I have a quick submission for you, I’m curious to see if I’m overreacting at all. This afternoon someone I work with sent the following company-wide e-mail:
Bringing my boat tomorrow and need 10 spaces on the far west end on the front row of the back lot.
Thanks for your cooperation!
Have a great day!
I appreciate the senders addition of “thank you” and “have a great day” but I feel the first sentence is quite rude. Parking spaces are always at a premium here, and this isn’t stated as a polite request but rather as a statement of fact, that this is what’s going to happen. Additionally, this is not for a work-related need, and he did not seek approval from any manager or authority prior to sending the message.
Several coworkers of mine contacted me (unsolicited) and agreed that they find the e-mail rude, but they’re not bothered by it because the sender is very commonly associated with this type of behavior. I’m not making a big stink out of this at work or anything, but I was curious to get the opinion of you and your readers on both the e-mail as well as the idea of excusing someone’s behavior because that’s “just how they are”. 0423-13
Update: As funny as this video is, it appears the couple are professional actors who have appeared on Pumpcast News 2 years ago.
Would you sing a song for a man speaking from a gas pump? Will did — and his impromptu performance so impressed the Tonight Show pranksters behind the stunt that he ended up entertaining millions in an NBC studio.
Using two-way camera mounted at the pump and other cameras in surrounding vehicles, Will and his wife happily sang for a free tank of gasoline when asked.
Jay Leno was so impressed that he invited the couple on his show. He said it was rare to see a couple so happy together.
I’m looking for some advice on whether I am the victim of poor etiquette or just being overly sensitive. I am a social person but I also have a polite spine. I am not afraid to say no to a social activity if it is not conducive to my schedule or an emergency arises. In recent weeks I passed on two dinners. One was a fundraiser connected to my work, we had plenty interested in going and a limited ticket budget so I passed so some of the new staff members could attend. The other was dinner with a group of girlfriends that I was excited to attend but unfortunately became ill so I stayed home to rest and keep my germs at bay from others.
Following each of these dinners I received messages from people who went saying “You missed a great time!” My first reaction was to feel hurt. I did want to go to these dinners but stayed home for good reasons, is it fair to rub it in that I couldn’t partake in the fun? I am always sensitive to others who aren’t included no matter the reason. I think it is okay to share how much fun you had but not to say how much fun the others missed.
Am I too sensitive about this? Perhaps over analyzing the meaning of the message? Or is it reasonable to be offended that others brag about what I missed? 0502-13
It would have been better if they had said, “You were missed! We had a lovely time but your absence was felt.” That conveys the thought that they were thinking of you, and encourages you to come the next time because they enjoy your company.
I, personally, would not take offense and prefer to view it as they are awkwardly expressing their belief that you would have enjoyed the evening with them. I’d rather have someone acknowledge in some clumsy way that they thought of me and how much fun they knew I would have had, then the alternative which is completely putting me mentally on the shelf without a further thought.
Some wealthy Manhattan moms have figured out a way to cut the long lines at Disney World — by hiring disabled people to pose as family members so they and their kids can jump to the front. By hiring non-Disney disabled tour guides, otherwise able bodied families benefit by jumping to the head of lines because handicapped guests in scooters or wheelchairs and up to six family members are often sent straight to an auxiliary entrance at the front of each attraction.
I use a scooter when I go to theme parks because my hip would never survive an entire day of walking. I last visited EPCOT in 2011, rented a three wheeled scooter but I don’t recall being shuttled to the head of the line. There were special gates for easier access by wheelchairs and scooters to the attraction and some rides require a cast member to move the scooter/wheelchair from the entrance area to a totally different exit area. However I recall waiting in line just like everyone else until we reached the head of the line. Particularly at Living Seas where I wound my way through the long lines with the rest of the waiting guests. Ditto for Test Track, the water ride in the Mexican pavilion and Norway’s Maelstrom. It may be different at the Magic Kingdom but 2 years ago at EPCOT I did not experience any benefit of being in a scooter other than the obvious one of sitting through most of my visit as opposed to standing. Considering that the article contains an obvious rant against the “1%”, I question whether this story is even accurate based on the bias being demonstrated instead of straight, factual reporting.
Etiquettehell.com LLC has, for years, been very supportive of various health awareness issues and charities. Very often the issues we support have a personal connection to me or someone within my family or circle of friends. I was diagnosed with malignant melanoma in September 2009 resulting in surgery for wide local excision of the melanoma and sentinel lymph node biopsy. Happily my melanoma was caught early enough that it had not spread. Since then PSAs on the Ehell forum has saved lives as people have discovered their own nascent melanomas. Early detection saves lives.
In 2008, my dear husband, aged 44, died on the couch at home after a prolonged illness. We lived in one state, his father and sister in another. Over the course of his two-year deterioration, they visited twice.
As I had no family in town, I was blessed to have a dear friend who went with me to make the cremation and funeral arrangements. With her loving support, I was able to make the decisions that needed to be made and was able to plan the memorial service that I knew my dear, late husband would have wanted. He and I had discussed such things.
The memorial service was lovely: 21-gun salute, a violin solo, bagpipes, dear friends telling stories about him… My late husband had been in the Air Force, so I was presented with an American flag. Odd as it may seem, I even had a friend tell me, in a rather embarrassed way, that it was the best funeral she had ever attended.
My late husband’s sister and father chose not to attend the memorial service I had for my late husband. Rather, they ran a separate, inaccurate, obituary (not the one that I had lovingly written) in the town where his father lived, and planned a $5,000 funeral there. A pastor who never knew my late husband performed the service. It was, from all I heard, a very sterile, somber event. An American flag was presented to his sister. They had the funeral home produce a video of pictures from my late husband’s life with generic piano music for the soundtrack, as the beautiful one I had independently produced with my late husband’s favorite songs, and had given to them in time for the second funeral, wasn’t to their taste. They asked me if I wanted a copy of their video. I said “thank you and yes.” I did not attend that funeral.
Less than a month later, I received a bill from the funeral home that orchestrated the second funeral. It was for the full amount of the second funeral, and included on the bill was a charge for the video! A note came with the bill stating that my father-in-law told them to bill me and have it come out of my late husband’s estate. Although I was aware of the second funeral, I had no input on it and never signed a contract with the second funeral home. I let that funeral home know in no uncertain terms that I was not legally obligated to make payment and therefore no payment would be forthcoming from me. I then filed a complaint with the Funeral Directors Association. The billing funeral director was required to take a “communicating with the family” course as well as, at my suggestion, an ethics course. I sent the video back. 0513-13
In the 15 to 18 years I have owned EtiquetteHell.com I have never heard of anyone having the audacity to plan a second funeral and pass the costs on to the widow. It is a first.
I had an odd experience where I offered a gift to someone, they refused, and then offered that gift immediately to someone else. The first time I was at work, walking down the hall and I had a special treat with me, a caramel-filled chocolate bar in my bag. I spotted a work colleague from [...]