A while ago, one of my friends, Laura, introduced a new girl, Tracey, into our group. Initially she seemed nice and funny. After spending some more time with her, though, I realized she was often rather unpleasant, making snide comments about people she didn’t consider to be her equal. It should be noted that Tracey is lucky enough to come from a very privileged background. I only mention this because of the importance she placed on this – comments such as, “I have to marry a rich man, because I will never earn enough to keep me in the comfort I’m used to”, were, sadly, not uncommon. I was also very unimpressed when she snubbed my boyfriend upon meeting him, and when she made a list of upcoming society events, with a corresponding list of names of people she could hit up for invitations to said events. No big deal, it’s a big group, it was easy for me to avoid her. Laura really liked Tracey, and was very impressed by her background, so would usually invite her along to everything. I therefore ensured that if I wanted to spend time with Laura, I would just organize a one on one event, coffee or the like, so she wouldn’t feel the need to invite Tracey. I’m sure Laura knew my feelings towards Tracey were on the cool side, but we never talked about it, and all was fine.
Now, one of the people Tracey would make snide comments about was Laura, and Laura’s family. I found it revolting, but it was so subtle that it was difficult to tell whether she truly realized how hurtful she was being, and Laura always laughed it off, so I never said anything. However, recently Laura told me, almost in tears, that she had been spending time at an event with Tracey and Tracey’s friends (who are from similar backgrounds to Tracey) when they began discussing whose families had holiday homes, and where. Tracey turned to Laura and asked her, apparently not very kindly, how many houses Laura’s family had. Laura was mortified, not only because her family doesn’t have a holiday home, but also because this was an exact repeat of what had happened only a few days previous. Yes, Tracey had orchestrated the exact same conversation, to deliberately try to embarrass Laura about her family (and no, Laura should not have been embarrassed, of course, but she is young and as I say, was very impressed by Tracey). Yes, they are still friends, despite the fact that they are not equals – Laura has far more grace and class than Tracey.
I was disgusted, I just thought that was cruel, and very catty. Still, I probably wouldn’t have submitted, but a week or so ago, I saw that Tracey had posted an open invitation to her birthday party on Facebook. I don’t think I will attend, for many good reasons, including the fact that the invitation is entitled “Celebrate Me!” and “jokingly” suggests, “If you don’t know what to get me – cold hard cash is a winner!”. Yuk. That was the straw that broke the camel’s back, for me. 1019-10
With Friends Like This…
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