My in-laws prefer to receive lists of exactly what the recipient wants for gift-giving occasions such as birthdays and Christmas. My BIL and SIL have been married for ten years, and she has always before provided a wish list when asked for Christmas.
This year, my MIL (who is a very sweet lady and wouldn’t hurt a fly) asked SIL for a wish list in November. She told SIL that because they (my parents-in-law) were now on a fixed income, they needed extra time to budget gift-buying.
Apparently, my SIL took umbrage to being asked for a wish list in November, because she told MIL several stores at which SIL would like a gift card. She said that she refused to “even think about Christmas until after Thanksgiving.”
MIL, who preferred to buy actual gifts rather than gift cards (thinking, like me, that gift cards are a bit of a cop-out), asked if SIL had any actual things that she wanted to put on the list. MIL says that she told SIL, “If you don’t give me a list, I will buy what I think you’ll like, not what I know you’ll like.” Not the most etiquettely-approved move on MIL’s part either, I grant you.
SIL responded with, “That’s ok, my garbageman will take whatever I leave for him.”
So, this year, SIL will get to sit around the tree watching the rest of us open our gifts, while she holds a small stack of gift cards in her hand. 1222-10
Just as the gift giver has no rights to how his/her gift is disposed of after being given to the recipient, people on the receiving end of gift giving have an obligation to not go announcing that any gifts they deem unsuitable will be “regifted” to the trashman.