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Kids Only Drinks

Hi! Not sure if I was at wrong here, but I did feel kind of bad at the end of the day.

We had gone to a friend’s house for a cookout one afternoon. We knew one other couple there, the host, and my boyfriend knew everyone else, but I didn’t. There were about 3 other little families with 2 kids each.

Towards the end of the day, everyone was starting to leave, some people were still there, and we were all hanging out. I got thirsty and went into the cooler to get a drink and saw that they had CapriSuns.. oooo! I thought, “I haven’t had one of these in ages.” I took one, popped in the straw, and started drinking it. As soon as I turned around, one of the couples that had kids said, “Hey!!! Those are for the kids!” His tone was in the not-so-kidding sound. I didn’t know what to say, so I said something like, “Well, I’m a kid, too, haha!”, then kind of turned around and changed topics. I felt really bad after getting the drink, but I had noticed that there were still some left, and this was way after everyone ate their lunches, etc, and most of the kids had left or were either winding down.. Should I not have taken the drink? The person that said this to me was related to the host. My mind didn’t even THINK about the kids at that moment and I felt really bad. Let me know if I’m in eHell!! 0926-13

CapriSuns would not qualify as “child only”, imo.    Tiny juice boxes would.  If they are all mingled in the same cooler with other drinks, and there was no note advising guests to reserve the CapriSuns  for the kids, I would assume that whatever is in the cooler is free for the taking by any guest.


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  • Margo October 1, 2013, 6:30 am

    Assuming that the nature of the event meant it was OK for you to et your own drink from the cooler rather than waiting to be offered one, then you were absolutely fine. IMO it was rude of the guy to make a comment, especially as he was not the host.

  • Lex October 1, 2013, 6:40 am

    I don’t think you were in the wrong here – the host has provided drinks, as a guest you are entitled to help yourself to anything the host has provided. The other couple were very much in the wrong for making a scene about it. If they had brought the drinks themselves they should have marked them. But it is very poor form to restrict access to drinks to kids only – IMO a host should provide soft drinks and (optionally) alcoholic drinks for ALL guests (obviously age restrictions and local laws apply) as not everyone wants wine/beer/cider/cocktails etc. Some will be driving.

    The fact that you were thirsty at all says more about their inattentive hosting than anything else. If the host said ‘Help yourself’ then don’t stress it, the other couple were the rude ones in this story.

  • Lo October 1, 2013, 6:49 am

    The only way I could even remotely understand why someone would say something to you is if maybe he had been the one to bring the Capri Sun for the kids and had worried about whether there were enough and even then I wouldn’t begrudge an adult one Capri Sun.

    There are adults only drinks. There is no such thing as a kids only drink. And the assumption is always that what’s in the cooler is up for grabs by all the adults. If they are worried about having enough drinks for the kids then a second cooler or a note like admin mentioned would easily fix this problem.

    Anyone assuming an adult is not going to take a Capri Sun is kidding themselves. I don’t drink them anymore but in my family if someone put Capri Sun out plenty of adults would be availing themselves of it because they’re delicious.

  • Kate October 1, 2013, 7:24 am

    What an ungracious person! I know she was only related to the actual host, but I would never dream of telling someone at someone else’s party that they couldn’t have something! I remember when I was in elementary school, we had a picnic, and all of the classes brought treats. I ate one that belonged to another class, and one of the teachers yelled at me, and told me that it was for her class. Thirty odd years later I still feel bad about it.

  • Green123 October 1, 2013, 7:24 am

    Oh dear. Parental protectionist entitlement in action! As long as the kids weren’t taking booze out of the cooler, and as long as no-one’s drinking someone’s expressed breast milk (yes, I speak from experience…) or little Jonny’s specially-labelled diabetic soda, it’s none of their business who’s drinking what!

  • josie October 1, 2013, 7:28 am

    I had a cooler of Capri Suns at my son’s grad party…definitely not a” kid only” drink. Besides, once you had put the straw in the pouch, its kinda a done deal.

  • Coralreef October 1, 2013, 7:52 am

    If the drinks were in the “help yourself” cooler, you did nothing wrong. I find the idea of a “kid only” beverage strange. “Adult only” because of alcohol, no problem. But adults like non-alcohol drinks too, if the success of my carbonated fruit punch is any indication.

  • Ergala October 1, 2013, 8:03 am

    I think the guy was out of line. I have children and I don’t sit there and say “That’s a juice box…those are ONLY for the children!”….if the host supplied them or it was a pot luck and everyone supplied something there was nothing off limits. I could see him becoming upset if it was his own personal cooler and he brought drinks for his own family but from the sounds of it that wasn’t the case. You aren’t in Ehell….he is.

  • Young at Heart October 1, 2013, 8:06 am

    I agree wholeheartedly with admin. If the host wanted those Capri Suns to be for children only, the host should have left a note or told every guest as such. And also I love your response. Release your inner (polite!) child!

  • Wild Irish Rose October 1, 2013, 8:14 am

    I’m with Admin. If the hosts had wanted a separation of “kid” drinks from “adult” beverages, then they should have had them in separate coolers with a note saying which was which. Also, not every adult drinks alcohol, so if they didn’t have soft drinks for the adults, then shame on them and the Capri Suns should have been offered to everyone.

  • Cat October 1, 2013, 8:17 am

    Unless you were told that some of the drinks were off-limits to adults, you did nothing wrong. I do have an issue with the man who saw you had already begun drinking the Caprisun and still decided to reprove you. Did he expect you to put it back after you had opened it?
    I would have said, “Sorry, no one told them these were off-limits.” and let it go.

  • PM October 1, 2013, 8:18 am

    You were fine. The drinks were set out for guests. You were a guest. Frankly, the kid who called you out was a bit rude to chastise an adult in that way for something that was pretty innocuous.

  • PrincessButtercup October 1, 2013, 8:34 am

    Unless you had been told before hand that you can have anything but the capri sun then you are not at fault. I have a drink fridge and when friends come over I tell them, “You can have anything on the bottom shelf or in the drawers. Anything else, ask first.” If you never received any instruction like that than you can’t be expected to be a mind reader and it was rude of the person to call you out in front of everyone.

  • Mae October 1, 2013, 8:36 am

    I would say, no, you are not in E-hell. If no one said or made a note that the CapriSuns were for the kids only, you would not know.

  • Sarah October 1, 2013, 8:45 am

    Unless the OP went into his personal cooler and took one of his drinks, or the drinks literally had names written on them, he had no right to say anything.

  • INeedANap October 1, 2013, 8:56 am

    Hey OP, I would say that comment was really weird. If there is an item or foodstuff that is being reserved for one or a few people at the event, then they need to be separated out. For example, if I am hosting a dinner party for 10 with 2 vegetarians, I won’t necessarily make enough vegetarian entrees for everyone, only about 3 or 4, and simply give plates of food to the right folks. If it was all in the same cooler, then it’s free for all.

    Most importantly — he was not the host. It was rude of him to 1) dictate arbitrary rules without checking with the host, 2) snap at you in front of others rather than having a private side conversation later. Let it go, you’re fine.

  • Amber October 1, 2013, 8:58 am

    What a ridiculous over-reaction on the fellow’s part. This is why I’m against splitting food and drink into adults/kids at events where food is served (saving alcoholic beverages, of course). For instance, adults get steak, kids get chicken nuggets or I suppose in this instance adults get soda kids get juice.

    Aside from the fact that the juice or the nuggets are no more healthy than the soda or the steak (the only viable reason I can think for serving children something different from adults), food and drink preferences don’t necessarily fall along some magical age line. Some kids will absolutely scarf down a steak while some adults would most definitely prefer a plate full of nuggets. This kiddie menu mentality needs to stop.

  • Jinx October 1, 2013, 8:58 am

    OP, don’t feel bad. They had a cooler out, and I assume the cooler didn’t say “kids drinks” on it (which I have seen at some parties). It makes me wonder what the adults were meant to drink at your party (were you meant to drink water or beer and no delightful juices?)

    There was no guidance about what you were supposed to be drinking, and it’s not as if you purposefully thought to yourself “haha.. I will take this delicious juice pouch from those children who don’t appreciate the taste of it anyway bwahaha”

    Really, the person who corrected you should feel bad, but probably doesn’t. The juice had been opened, you’d already used the straw. What did he hope to accomplish by what he said. Also… it wasn’t his house, so that’s also a little overstepping his boundaries to chastise a guest (not that ANY host should do that).

    If he really felt it was a problem, he should have said “Oh, OP, I’m sorry I didn’t show you this delicious brandy, no need to drink those kiddy juices with this tasty adults only drink around” or something that implies that he was wrong for not directing you to the correct drinks if he is taking the role of beverage coordinator. Why use language that purposefully creates blame on a guest who doesn’t have evil motives, just thirst?

    If the cooler isn’t labelled, and no one *politely* directs you towards what you are required to drink, how would you possibly know? As Admin mentioned, tiny juiceboxes would have been a great clue, but this is a casual backyard get-together, not a mystery game. I know people who are well beyond their childhood who would still get a kick out of a pouch of caprisun.

    I guess in the future, if you see these people, I would specifically ask which bevs are “kids only”, though if you ever come to a party at my place, anything I have available that you want to drink, you may have.

  • Elizabeth October 1, 2013, 9:01 am

    LoL! How rude of the guest to decide what is for whom – regardless of his relationship to the host. A possible response: ‘There seem to be plenty here so perhaps they are for all,” and then bean dip.

    You were not wrong to have the drink and your response was polite in the face of rudeness.

  • InNM October 1, 2013, 9:02 am

    I don’t think that juice boxes say children only, but that’s be because I’ve gone too way too many university events where there is a cooler of Capri sun. The OP did not arrive at the party and immediately commandeer all the Capri suns, depriving the children of any. She did say it was near the end of the event, most of the children had left, and there were extra Capri sun. It sounds to me like someone was marking the food and drink (for whatever purpose) when it was unneeded.
    At a small gathering, it can be awkward to find an appropriate response if called out like that, and a rude response would be awkward. Ignoring the drinks martial would be one approach, another would be going to the host and asking quietly if, now that the kids had fulfilled their Capri sun appetites if the adults could partake. That way if/when you reached for Capri Sun #2 and are publicly chastised, you can calmly respond that the host has given permission.

  • Wendy B. October 1, 2013, 9:03 am

    We’ve had parties in the past where my mom purchased Hugs (I don’t know if they’re universal or regional or not, but they’re “juice” drinks in little plastic barrels.) We would laugh at the number of adults who would see Hugs and grab one and the kids would go for something else. 🙂

    I think in this case you were okay.

  • AMC October 1, 2013, 9:04 am

    Unless there was signage indicating that those drinks were specifically for the kids, I don’t think you did anything wrong. You’re not psychic. It’s the host’s fault for not keeping kid and adult drinks separate or otherwise making sure all guests were aware of those arrangements.

  • viviennebzb October 1, 2013, 9:40 am

    I would say the person raising their voice to chastise you (assuming they were not joking) was the rude one here. You were perfectly fine and I love your “still a kid” response.

  • DGS October 1, 2013, 9:51 am

    You were thirsty, so you helped yourself to a drink at a cook-out that you were invited to; I’d say the only person in error was the rude parent of one of the kids.

    Off topic, but Capri Suns and tiny juice boxes are full of sugar…it might be a good idea to avoid giving them to kids and instead, offer water or milk.

  • startruck October 1, 2013, 10:18 am

    oh my goodness, you didnt do anything wrong. specially after the party was winding down and all the kids had already had their fill of drink. this guy was rude to call you out like that. i mean, who does that?

  • Ashley October 1, 2013, 10:31 am

    And I bet most of the kids had passed up the Capri-Sun in favor of soda instead…

    I see nothing wrong with what you did, especially if they were all in one big cooler with the other drinks. There is no such thing as a kid only drink. Depending on what else was available (I don’t drink soda) I might have done the same thing. Capri-sun and juice boxes still amuse me about as much when I was a kid.

  • Abby October 1, 2013, 10:45 am

    Unless the scolding man in question watched the OP hip-check a small child in order to claim the last capri sun pouch, I’d say he was out of line. When you add the fact that the party was winding down, there were plenty pouches left, and he didn’t say anything until after OP opened one up (so clearly nothing could be done about it, he just called OP out to embarrass her) I’d be far more inclined to send him to E-hell.

  • The Elf October 1, 2013, 10:46 am

    I agree with the Admin and other posters; you did nothing wrong. I might have had a few qualms if you took the last one, or if it was very early in the party, but considering this happened during the “winding down”, the kids had plenty of opportunity to get them, and there was quite a few left after you took yours, I’d say you were definitely in the clear.

    I love your “I’m a kid” response too!

  • Reno October 1, 2013, 11:08 am

    I’m with the others. I think you were fine. The day was winding down and you couldn’t possibly be leaving them in a position that the kid’s drinks were going to run out.

    I think the guys response was rude. First, you are an adult and were taking something out of a shared cooler. Second, you were already drinking it. What did he expect you to do? Personally, I wonder if he’s been chastised by his wife for drinking the kid’s drinks one to many times 🙂

  • Charliesmum October 1, 2013, 11:17 am

    I wonder what the odds are that the person who called you on the drink was hoping to take the rest home to put in his ‘fridge for his own kids.

  • MichelleP October 1, 2013, 11:18 am

    You definitely did nothing wrong. The guy was rude. I can’t stand the food police. I would say that to a guest, especially when I was a guest.

    I had a relative in my family who was a “food patrol” self-appointed cop. We never had a lack of food at any family gathering, but she couldn’t stand for anyone to actually eat what she brought. One Christmas she brought two platters of deviled eggs to our family gathering (not at her house). She put one in the fridge (“hid it”-her words) and put the other on the counter. She complained about people taking more than one, (did that at other events when she brought them), and when I went to bring out the one in the fridge when the tray was empty, she stopped me! I was always embarassed by her behavior about food.

    I wouldn’t be caught dead running out of food or fussing at guests for getting what’s available.

  • MichelleP October 1, 2013, 11:19 am

    Oops, should have put “I wouldn’t say that to a guest”! Sorry!

  • Stacey Frith-Smith October 1, 2013, 11:20 am

    I don’t think anyone should be casually chastising another adult- but in this case, it wasn’t even the host. I don’t know, OP, it seems to me that you don’t owe an explanation to any random body that chooses to micromanage your conduct.

  • Angel October 1, 2013, 11:30 am

    The person who “called you out” was the rude one, not you. People who do this make it awkward for everybody else. It’s not as though you ripped a CapriSun out of a child’s hand for goodness sakes!

  • LR October 1, 2013, 11:57 am

    I think that the idea of “kids only drinks” is rather unusual. Certainly there could be “adults only” drinks, like alcohol, coffee, etc., but why shouldn’t an adult drink juice? Silly.

  • Hello! October 1, 2013, 12:10 pm

    So sad when an adult embarrasses another like that. Let’s say the cooler belonged to the man (the only reason I can think of where he put himself in charge of the drinks) and he saw you take one. He should NOT have said a word, but should have then picked up the cooler and put it back in his car, or under his table, or something to keep it out of public view.

  • Ergala October 1, 2013, 12:22 pm

    DGS I don’t think having a Caprisun at a cook out is going to rot their teeth or make them incredibly hyper (which by the way has been disproven). I’d be more concerned about the mold found in them and sometimes the little worms that can end up in the pouches. It’s one of the HUGE reasons we don’t buy them. We do Almond Milk and Water ourselves…if they kids want juice I have a juicer or I slice a lemon and pop a wedge in their water after squeezing it a little. Never a complaint.

    I have a friend who will visit and literally go through an entire bag of coffee and container of creamer in 1 day. It’s all he drinks. Usually a thing of coffee will last me a month if not longer. I have a french press. I tried to explain that I wanted my coffee to last since it was the really expensive stuff, I wanted it as a treat on the mornings my kids are more than their usual crazy. He drank it all and I had no idea. I went to make a pot of it when I realized the canister was completely empty. I had just opened it too and it was full when he got there. He was already gone at that point. Now I have to hide stuff in our home from visitors and it makes me sad.

  • kingsrings October 1, 2013, 12:37 pm

    I drink Capri Sun all the time! And DGS – there are lower-sugar Capri Suns available. I usually drink them along with my lunch at work. I would never hesitate to take one at a party, either. The guest was very rude to chastise you. Like others have said, any food/drink items specifically for a certain group need to be marked as off limits. Otherwise, they’re for everyone! I used to socialize with a group from my former church that had young kids, and at our group parties, there was always a giant bowl of Kraft macaroni and cheese for the kids. It was never marked as ‘kids only’, and was such a giant bowl that I helped myself to it too, and so did some other adults. I’ll always love Kraft macaroni and cheese! We wouldn’t take a huge amount of course, being that there were other dishes to have as well. None of the parents ever complained that we were eating their kid’s dish.

  • Barbarian October 1, 2013, 1:01 pm

    The guy may have earmarked the Capri Sun drinks to take home after the party and was hoping to guard them before it ended. OP thwarted him.

  • Jane October 1, 2013, 1:33 pm

    I agree with the others – you did nothing wrong, especially given that it was at the end of the party. If they wanted “kid’s only” drinks, they should have had a separate cooler.

    Once I hosted an outdoor summer party and had plenty of sodas and waters in a cooler. Leave it to one guest who went inside my house and took juice from the refrigerator. That juice was for our breakfast through the week, so needless to say I was a little annoyed.

  • Jewel October 1, 2013, 1:46 pm

    While uncouth, I can see someone blaring that the drinks are only for the kids if the potluck guest reaching for the drink pouch had trampled on everyone’s last nerve all day long. So, if the guest didn’t bring a dish to contribute (but had no compunction about eating heartily from the potluck table anyway), had unappetizing mannerisms, insulted the other guests/hosts, and was just generally being annoying, I couldn’t really find fault with letting that guest know to keep her hands off the drinks.

    Assuming that wasn’t the case, though, I think the OP just ran into a garden variety boor. I would have been tempted to sweetly and repeatedly apologize while insisting that Mr. Boor allow me to pay for the drink (just to make him feel like a heel, of course).

  • Emmy October 1, 2013, 1:57 pm

    Unless not being able to read minds is now considered rude, you did nothing wrong. It sounds like the drinks were all together in one cooler and not labeled so there it is unreasonable for anyone to be expected to know that certain drinks were for the kids. The other guest was very rude for calling you out like that. You have no reason to feel bad.

  • sv October 1, 2013, 2:36 pm

    Unless this was a party where they had provided *exactly* one drink per child and this was understood by everyone, then I can’t imagine how the other guest felt it was okay to chastise you. It’s a drink, for heaven’s sake! Great response – keeping things light & polite 🙂

  • Marozia October 1, 2013, 3:35 pm

    If it’s in the cooler, it’s fair game for all.

  • LizaJane October 1, 2013, 4:37 pm

    I want a single key on my keyboard that would type, “WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOME PEOPLE?”
    I would use it a lot.

  • Angela October 1, 2013, 4:54 pm

    If it’ s the end of a cookout, I would MUCH rather a guest of mine take a Capri Sun than an alcoholic beverage, especially if alcohol has already been flowing. The person who called out the OP was WAY out of line. Now if the OP was a 15-year-old sneaking a beer, that might be different.

  • KitKat October 1, 2013, 6:28 pm

    I see nothing wrong also. And I think the answer was brilliant.

    I agree; kiddie menu mentality does need to stop. The only way you should have a kiddie menu is if it’s things “adults” eat but in smaller, appropriately sized portions for children.
    Growing up I ate a wide variety of things and was encouraged to try others. After my most recent food escapade involving sushi, my mother commented, “First [your brother] eats sushi and now you’re eating it. What kinds of children did I raise?” I simply said, “Adventurous eaters.” She laughed because it was so very true. My motto regarding food is “I’m not a picky eater; I’m just picky about how it goes together.” (I have taste/texture issues with certain foods.)

  • jojo October 1, 2013, 6:31 pm

    I presume a tap ( faucet) with water was near enough that anyone running out of refreshments could help themselves to that? In which case the drinks available are fair game. I always make sure my family have water to drink at all times, anything else is a bonus.

  • Lauren October 1, 2013, 6:49 pm

    You are such a sweety. I think you handled it better than I would have. I would have laughed in his face.

  • crebj October 1, 2013, 6:56 pm

    The guy was rude. I think you were flustered, and didn’t respond as well as you could have. It sounded defensive and like “screw you.” I’m sure you didn’t mean that. A simple “I’m sorry, I didn’t realize that” would have done.