I have 3 grown children. My daughter is married with two young children who are a gift to me with just their presence. Her family is struggling to make ends meet so Christmas gifts other than to her children are hard to do. My youngest son is single with a girlfriend and he is the most generous person. He bought me a new fridge for this Christmas because mine was on its last legs and I was totally surprised. My oldest son is hardworking and giving of his time and actions but really hates to shop. He usually doesn’t give gifts at all. Both my sons earn the same pay.
I was planning to treat them equally on gifts this year but would really like to get youngest son something very nice, not because of his gift but because of his loving, generous spirit. I would appreciate having your opinions to consider. 1205-13
Youngest son gets you a refrigerator and he’s the one child you would bestow “something very nice”to reward his “loving, generous spirit” but you appear to diminish the oldest son’s “giving of his time and actions” as unworthy. Anyone can order a refrigerator online from the local home store in a matter of minutes. But gifts of time and deeds takes a considerable personal investment that far exceeds the value of a store bought item. You, dear madam, are defining generosity by material standards. Pity your poor daughter who is busy with your precious grandchildren but she’s too poor to ever meet your definition of generosity.
If you were my mother, words cannot express how disheartening it would be to realize that you judged me and each sibling by such a petty yard stick.