My sibling’s significant other does not RSVP to any invitation, whether the invitation is in print, emailed, or discussed person-to-person. Since I’m the one supplying the food and drinks, I need to know who’s going to be there, right? I want to call this person up and say, “ARE YOU ATTENDING OR NOT?” However, I don’t want to be pushy, or anger my sibling, or be rude. Frankly, though, I think that the significant other is being rude by not responding to an invitation. I never know whether this person will show up or not. Should I say anything to this person or just let it go? If I should say something to this person, what is the best way to say it? 0406-14
Not responding to an invitation is one of my personal peeves. As if my meal planning and preparation, shopping, getting the house ready and sending invitations wasn’t enough, these people appear to expect me to come begging them for an answer. Over the years I come to this conclusion, “If I have to contact you after the RSVP due date and beg you to give me an RSVP, any RSVP, to my invitation, I made a mistake inviting you.” And I don’t repeat that mistake twice. There is a reason why some people sit at home lonely and are social outcasts. Occasionally people have submitted stories to this site whining of having been left out of some cool event all their friends have been invited to and I wonder if the reason for the snub is they have been dismissive of previous invitations and what they are experiencing is the fallout of having been far too casual in RSVPing to prior invitations.
If you choose to continue sending invitations to your sibling’s SO, I would plan on setting the table for the exact number of guests who actually had the courtesy to respond to your kind invitation. If the SO deigns to attend your function, you greet him/her at the door thusly, “Oh…..when I didn’t hear from you I assumed you were not coming. Let me see if I can scrounge up an extra chair and place setting. ” I would make it obviously awkward for this rude guest who has so little respect for you that he/she cannot be bothered to inform you of an intent to attend.