My husband and I got married a couple of months ago, it was a very small wedding with only close friends. We went away the week after for our honeymoon and after we arrived back my friend came over to visit us. And didn’t leave for about 3 weeks.
This friend was at the wedding, she split up with her ex in December and had since been living at her parents’ house, rent free, and they paid off her debts. So basically she had over 3 months to save up money to find her own place.
Whilst staying with us she borrowed money from me, managed to quit her job, fell out with her parents, went about bitching about me (not my husband). We did not invite her to stay with us – she moaned to a mutual friend that she thought it was inappropriate that me and my husband cuddled on the couch to watch TV in the evening, her words were, “I don’t need to see that, they should have more respect for me when I am a guest in their home.”
She left my house one night and sent me a bitchy text about the way I apparently spoke to her. I apologized and found out while she was away she had told a lie that caused trouble between my BIL and his flat mate. I stopped answering her calls because I was too angry to speak to her and she sent me a text telling me I had to “justify” myself to her. I replied that she had crossed a line and she told me I would regret speaking to her that way. She also Facebooked my mum to ask her about me.
Whilst talking to a mutual friend (who has had a fallen out with her due to her borrowing her car, lying about insuring it for her to use and drink driving in it) I suddenly pieced together why she was staying with me – it wasn’t for me, it was for my husband. She had taken sneaky photos of him and even started referring to him by a pet name I use for him!
She owes me about £200, should I just write that off or ask for it back? 0425-14
OP, you and your husband are doormats and everything that has happened to you is due entirely to your lack of a spine of any kind. You have “Walk All Over Me” written in invisible ink on your foreheads. When this “friend” tried to overstay her welcome on her first visit to see you after you arrived home from the honeymoon, you should have politely but firmly shown her the door while yawning uncontrollably. Under no circumstances should her luggage have walked through the door without an incredulous, “What is that?”, followed by an equally incredulous, “You are doing what in our house?”
Boundaries are a good thing. Ponder and consider your personal and married boundaries and then enforce the boundaries. Not caving in to an uninvited house guests, no lending money to deadbeats, no photos of us in our home, would be a good start to the list of boundary lines. Forget the $200 since trying to retrieve it would involve interacting with a loon and give fodder for more drama. Some things in life just aren’t worth the price of the theatrical drama. Chalk it up to the price of a lesson learned.
Dear readers, is there anyone out there who can make me a custom image of an Ehell doormat? I really, really need one because it is submitted stories such as this that are just screaming to receive an official Ehell Doormat Award. In the interim, I’ll just have to link to these images…..