The Baby Shower That Came With A Bill

by admin on March 30, 2015

Last year I was invited to a “gift card” baby shower. According to the emailed invitation, it was hosted by the daddy-to-be’s sister and the mother-to-be’s friend at a modestly priced restaurant over the brunch hour.

There were about 15 of us in total, including the guest of honour, and the baby’s two grandmothers. We were seated at a series of pushed together tables at the back of the restaurant, but not in a private section, so lots of other patrons around us. The cards and little bags we brought were put into a corner for safety and not acknowledged at all. There were three tiny balloons on little stands on top of the set of tables as “decoration”.

We all ordered our breakfasts from the regular menu and basically just chatted for about an hour or so. No games, no special menu, no speech from the mother-to-be, nothing at all.

At the end of the meal, the waitress came around and handed out individual bills for each of us. My jaw probably hit the floor at that point, but what could I do? At that point in time, the two grandmothers “fought” over the mother-to-be’s bill because she had also been presented with a bill! I quietly paid for my breakfast, wished the mother-to-be luck and left.

What could I have done? I definitely feel like a bait and switch had been pulled on me. When an event is hosted, doesn’t that mean that they are paying for the guests to eat? Had I known I would have been paying my own way I would have declined, or at least decreased the dollar amount of my very generous gift card. 0324-15

I hate to say it but in this day and age, I think it is wise to presume people are rude boors and go prepared to pay your own way.    If the hosts actually pay for the meals, it will be a delightful and unusual surprise.

{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }

Cheryl April 14, 2015 at 3:30 pm

I hate, hate, hate when this happens. This is what needs to happen, but due to the newer generations old traditions have been lost, when you host, especially when it is two people you host which includes providing food and drinks, sometimes little favors are given to the guests but you don’t hand them a bill. What was done was rude, unless specified by the hostesses to the guests when they RSVP or called about the gift list. If you can’t afford a restaurant then either cook at your own house of have it catered at your own place, therefore, it is more intimate, the presents can be opened and if the mother wants it, you can play games.

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c July 23, 2015 at 12:17 pm

Did you go to support your friend or for the free meal you thought you would get?

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Vrinda August 13, 2015 at 9:46 am

So it’s okay to host a party, invite people, and make them pay for their own meal – because that’s “genuine” proof that they’re there to support the guest of honor?

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