When DH and I got married a few years ago, it truly was the best day of my life. Everything was perfect and all of the stress we’d been managing just melted away.
One of our persistent stressors was one of my bridesmaids. Laura was a total sweetheart and was also perhaps one of the most clueless people we’d ever encountered. Her husband was one of the groomsmen and the four of us were close. We figured that she would be a fun addition to the party and she was thrilled when we asked her.
I had four ladies in my party. One was tall and stocky. One was short and had very large hips. One was extremely small. And one would be breastfeeding and have given birth about six months before the wedding. The odds of finding one dress that everyone liked and could afford were small so I decided to just ask the ladies to wear little black cocktail dresses. As long as they were about knee length and not strapless or long sleeved, we were good.
MOH found an adorable dress on ETSY. BM1 found one on sale that she actually was able to wear again over the years as did BM2. And then there was Laura.
We went to visit Laura and her boyfriend one night and she excitedly showed me the things she had bought that day. Her purchases included a cute sundress. It was white with bright purple flowers on it and it was perfect for a summer day. Not for an elegant fall wedding with an evening reception like she intended. I tried to be diplomatic and I explained that her dress was adorable and that it would look gorgeous on her but that everyone else would be wearing little black dresses. She mock pouted and said that that’s what her boyfriend had told her too but that it didn’t hurt to check. It didn’t but I began to worry a little.
A few weeks before the wedding, Laura wanted to accompany me to my first dress fitting. We had a great time and decided to go for a drink afterwards (she had given birth and wasn’t breastfeeding). And then she told me about her second dress purchase.
It was black. It was knee length. And it was strapless.
Ok well we could throw a wrap on for photos. I wasn’t going to stress.
Oh and it didn’t fit at all.
She hadn’t tried it on in the store and she had bought the wrong size. The store wouldn’t let her exchange it because it had been on clearance. She was accusatory as she began telling a friend we ran into about it. She acted as if I was a bridezilla who was making her find a new dress when she already had this amazing sundress. (Did I mention that she was in her late thirties?)
I gave it a couple of days and then, the next time we went to visit, I offered to bring some dresses for her to borrow. I’ve been different sizes over the years and I’ve got a lot of little black dresses
She was pleased and she promised to try them on right away.
A week passed. And another. And another.
Two weeks before the wedding, she still hadn’t tried in a single dress. My other ladies were starting to get annoyed with her and her boyfriend was starting to fret (he’d been amazing with helping the guys sort the tuxes). She didn’t care. She was super excited about the wedding but she did not care about making sure a dress fit. And in the meantime, she had all of my dresses held hostage hahaha.
Two days to go and she still hadn’t tried on a dress. We were all annoyed at this point especially because she kept mentioning the stupid sundress.
She was an hour late the day of the wedding. No worries. I’d planned for that and we still had a good hour to finish getting ready. She had lucked out and was able to wear the newest of the dresses and it looked great!
She’d also had her hair done the day before and had slept on it. MOH was a hairdresser and she offered to touch it up. Laura rejected her offer and said that her hair was just fine. It wasn’t. Her sleek, long bob was all matted in one side. MOH tried again to offer and finally just told her to hold still because she was fixing things.
And the kicker? She liked the black dress so much that I let her keep it and the sundress was forgotten.
Laura is a great person. She’s kind and funny and she’s got a beautiful heart. She’s a good mother and partner. She just happens to be a terrible bridesmaid. 0406-17