My husband and I love, love, love to travel. We take 2 trips per year, always by ourselves for our anniversary and then sometimes with my family for the other ones.
We would travel regardless of my family but they love to travel as much as I do and we enjoy traveling together very much. My husband’s family has expressed hurt feelings that we have never taken a trip with them. This surprised me because none of them travel often and also traveling takes some planning and not a single one of them are good at planning.
My husband has decided that we will take a family cruise this year. His thought is that this way no one has to be the hostess and with a large group we can be together as much or as little as we like, separating during the day to do activities we enjoy but eating together in the evening.
I think this is a fantastic way for a large family to travel and I think this would be a lot of fun.
Now to the problem. My husband’s family is from another country. Although they have all lived in the U.S for close to 20 years and speak English fluently on a daily basis, when they are together they speak in their native tongue. I understand why but this often leaves me feeling like an outsider and frustrated. My husband, try as he might, always forgets to translate as they speak and I have to constantly nudge him. I finally gave up on that and often just sit with a large group of people feeling like I’m just listening to noise. I’m learning the language but it is extremely difficult and I only catch words here and there and can’t follow the conversation.
They have even done this in my home, which is very rude in my opinion, and my husband had to keep reminding them to speak English. He feels comfortable doing this in our home but not anywhere else. (I need to add he is the youngest and quite shy).
When I think of spending a week of my hard earned money and time sitting there in a huge group not knowing what’s going on, I can hardly stand the thought. How miserable I would be!! As it is now I only have to put up with it a few hours at a time.
I have asked my husband if I could invite my family along so I would have someone to talk to and he thinks his family would be upset by that because we would be intruding on their family time. I explained why and he understands but thinks it would cause tension.
I only get to travel twice per year and I am not willing to give up one of those trips to be cut off from communication.
Any advice for how to approach this? 0425-17