If you thought listing registries in wedding and party invitations is bad, how about just sending out the registry? Someone I know apparently thought it would be a good idea to throw the archaic correlation between parties and gifts to the wind: instead of hosting a birthday party for herself (a faux pas in itself) in order to get presents, why not cut out the middle-man and the expense and just demand the presents, well, simply because she’s alive?
Below is the actual text of an email I received from a “friend.” In all reality, I never really got to know this woman very well. She is a friend of someone I used to date but no longer have much contact with. I will see this woman out occasionally, and we are always civil, but even when I was dating her friend, she and I were never really close. Apparently, though, she thought that she and I were close enough of friends to send me the email below insinuating the expectation of a birthday present from me. The fact that she thought it unnecessary to buy me a birthday present last November is in itself inconsequential (like I said, we were never very close friends, and it didn’t even cross my mind until I received her email), but it adds an amusing element to this story.
The email started off innocently enough, with the subject, “Aren’t you glad I was born?” I thought perhaps it was a forwarded email joke. I was sadly mistaken.“My birthday is upon us…” My first indication of who she is really thinking about when writing this email.
“…in 10 days…” Ah, her birthday. Could this be an invitation to a birthday party perhaps? Again I was sadly mistaken.
“…and back by popular demand and at the request of many…” Who these “many” are, I do not know, but I certainly was not among this group.
“… here are my wish lists. Know what I want and that I’ll like it but still let it be a surprise. You don’t even have to leave your computer to do it!” How thoughtful of her to try and make gift-giving as painless on the givers as possible!
Next, she lists two links to online wishlists – one on amazon.com and the other on a website I’m not familiar with. I don’t know what was listed on either list because I had no desire to find out what types of things this woman expected she “deserved” to receive on her birthday.
“Please forward —— to anyone else who might want to spread some joy on July 10th! Thanks!” …followed by her signature. As if practically insisting that I buy her a birthday present isn’t enough, she would like me to spread the tackiness – ahem – “the joy” by forwarding her shameless grab for gifts on to others.
Ultimately, I decided not to feed this particular gimme pig, and chose not to even dignify the email with a response. 08-06-08