≡ Menu

It’s His Birthday And He’s Got A LOOONG List

I recently received this email.  The sender is the new wife of my husband’s cousin. We have only met the cousin (turning 21) twice.  We met his new wife at a wedding (not theirs) two months ago.  We spent all of 15 minutes with her at the reception. We live across the country from them, so we won’t see them again soon.  She is almost 40 and should know better!  Here is the email (sent to a large list of us, including his parents).  Names changed -and at least she closes it with “thank you”.

Hey guys I am sending this to you for Jake so that you know what he would like for his birthday!!! That and he can’t remember his password for his email address….

1) King size mattress
2) Revolving 22 hand gun
3) GMC Safari
4) New couch- if used in good condition…
5) Wolverine Origins or Transformers 2 Revenge of the Fallen
6) Gift Cards- For clothes (underwear LOL) Big and Tall or Casual Male
XL, Red Lobster
7) Down Payment for a car!!!
8) Vaccum cleaner (dison ball or the one like his parents have) if you
feel generous enough……
9) Butcher Knives (you can find at any knife store)
10) Stereo
11) Size 13 New Balance Shoes
12) Surround sound system
13) 12 cup Coffee Maker
14) Alarm Clock
15) MP3 player
16) Digital Camera/Video Recorder
17) Any kind of fishing gear (Fishing Pole for regular fishing)
18) Electric Shaver
19) MONEY MONEY single bills preferably
Oh and for those of you that don’t live here , here is our address full address and cell phone numbers

thank you and love you all


{ 18 comments… add one }
  • Caroline November 12, 2009, 8:37 am

    At least she provided a wide price range. 🙂

  • vintage_schwinn November 12, 2009, 10:19 am

    I usually buy people cars for their birthday, so consider the GMC Safari off the list. lol

  • Erica November 12, 2009, 12:36 pm

    A GMC Safari? You have GOT to be kidding!

  • flora November 12, 2009, 4:58 pm

    I put the blame on the wife, not Jake. Considering that most of this stuff is pretty gender neutral, who knows if he knows that she sent this out on his behalf? On another note, I’d be pretty embarressed if my husband suggested people get me gift cards for new underwear.

  • Brenda November 13, 2009, 6:52 pm

    The last one, asking for single bills, is that so he has plenty of money to spend at the local strip club, or did she put up a pole in the bedroom? I am so glad I have no idea what these people look like.

  • Alexis November 14, 2009, 3:49 pm

    For my birthday I’d like a pony and a Ferarri.

  • kitchenscratch November 15, 2009, 2:47 pm

    I took “single bills” to mean “one single bill”, so I’m sure that Jake would like my present of $1.

  • Claire January 6, 2010, 6:55 pm

    It’s interesting that the vacuum cleaner gets a special “if you’re really generous” designation, whereas I guess making a down payment on a car would just be more of a gesture.

  • Fanboy Wife January 25, 2010, 7:55 pm

    What adult is still making birthday wish lists? Additionally, is it even legal to give guns as gifts? Don’t guns have to be registered to the owner?

  • Izzy February 7, 2010, 6:56 am

    ew a 40 year old cougar with a 21 year old guy? that screams ick already
    Not that all age gaps mean insta-failure, but this one…something about it suggest a unhealthy relationship
    Uh, I can’t really think of a time this might be appropriate. I mean, maybe hinting over the phone what he wants might work (i know I sometimes ask people what they want for their birthday) but a list? Sheesh…quite ambitious there.
    And omg a dyson vacuum? That’s the brand the queen uses! They’re SUPER expensive (But sooooooooooo worth it, it’s very clean). But dyson ball? ur wasting your money, it doesn’t really get into corners, or under furniture, is more fragile and verrrrry heavy. Like, might-give-you-carpal-tunnel heavy. Hope nobody wastes $500+ on that piece of junk. Fork out some more money for a real vacuum, otherwise you’re wasting your time.

  • Cady March 23, 2010, 5:00 pm

    Fanboy Wife: It depends on what state you live in, but in some states you don’t have to register a gun at all if it’s given as a gift. We live in Idaho, and he called the state licensing office to ask how to register the gun, since he got it from a friend, and they told him he didn’t have to register it at all. In fact, I don’t think you actually have to register handguns at all in Idaho.

  • Age March 24, 2010, 7:01 pm

    It’s gotta be a joke. No one is actually this silly.

    ….I hope

  • MrsAdorkable March 26, 2010, 7:40 pm

    This feels more like an overzealous mommy throwing her son his first birthday party.

  • kingshearte April 21, 2010, 12:40 pm

    “It’s interesting that the vacuum cleaner gets a special “if you’re really generous” designation, whereas I guess making a down payment on a car would just be more of a gesture.” ~ Claire

    Nevermind the downpayment on a car; there’s a whole damn car on this list, too!

  • Michelle Prieur May 31, 2010, 2:43 am


  • N Monster July 28, 2010, 3:36 pm

    Seriously, I think the gun and the butcher knives are not wise requests. And who needs to be informed that butcher knives can be purchased at a knife shop? Age does not equal experience, I guess.. or brains, or manners.

  • DaisyChain October 14, 2010, 4:26 pm

    Maybe the sender got confused and thought their friends were Oprah? “You’re getting a car! And you’re getting a car! And you’re getting a car!”

    Easy mistake to make…

  • Donna February 9, 2011, 10:28 am

    I guess he got quite a few electric shavers and gift cards for undies. I’m guessing he wanted money in bills to pose with.

Leave a Comment

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Next post:

Previous post: