Howdy! I love the site, and after reading I
have to share this, this. . .thing -- tucked into a baby shower invitation I received last
year (and needless to say didn't attend) from a friend of ours. Names/locations have
been changed. I think it speakes for itself:
Ms. Daphne Tucker, renowned local area Psychic has offered to do Tarot Readings for
attendees at the shower. All proceeds will go to Will & Sarah for the
Baby. So bring your checkbooks or cash, you will have great fun and be delighted by
Daphne's amazing insight (and Will & Sarah will love the "special gift")
$25.00 per reading (approx. time per reading is 15 minutes)
Call ahead to schedule your time for a reading, or do so at the party. To
preschedule, call XXXXX
Prepare to have fun!! I look forward to seeing you all at the party and hearing from
some of you before hand to set your time slot with "Daphne."
(Look for articles in the newspaper on Daphne, there should be some new ones out
soon. Daphne normally charges a min. of $150.00 per hour for parties, and personal
sessions normally start ta $85.00. This is an honor to have her come and offer her
services to us to benefit our new Baby!)
I have a friend, lets say her name is Liz. Liz was expecting a baby and had picked out
two sets of godparents for her baby. These people where friends of hers and they had been
close for years. They decided to give her a baby shower. She agreed to let them give her
the shower but she quickly took over the planning and ordering the most expensive
invitations, decorations and souvenirs but did not hand over any money. Friends and family
decided to cook so that she could save on the cost of a caterer. The four godparents were
to split all of the expenses which were quite high.
Liz and her husband ended up getting custom made matching outfits and shoes made Mr.
Liz paid for his but Ms. Liz swindled her friends into giving her money for hers under the
guise that it was for something else. One of the godparents spent at least $1500 dollars
on her share of the goods and services.
At the last minute Liz decided she needed to run out and get a few simple items such as
scotch tape and paper towels well she managed to spend $160 on these things. She notified
her godparents that they each owed her $40. Everyone paid up except one girl who told Liz
that she would have to pay her at a later date because she had just received an eviction
notice because she had spent rent money twice paying for this shower. Well, low and behold
Liz stopped speaking to her over $40 and is refusing to let her see the baby until she
pays up. Mind you, Mr. and Mrs. Liz both have good paying jobs and are doing very well.
They cleared nearly $2000 in cash gifts and they will not have to buy anything for their
baby except formula for at least 9 months. Six months later Liz is still going
around tell everyone who will listen what a cheapskate her friend is. PS. I
can vouch for her friend spending this amount of money be cause I went of shopping trips
with her and I have also seen receipts.
I had to tell someone about this. I was
invited to my new cousin-in-laws baby shower and so was my new mother-in law. Everything
was going fine until my mother-in-law taps me on the sholder and informs me her friend has
arrived and she will be right back. She invited one of her friends to the shower on her
own! Even worse they went into the other room of the restaurant and spent the rest of the
shower caching up with each other. She even ordered food and didn't touch it and my new
cousin was paying for everything. I even had to go let them know it was over. I asked for
a to go box for the food and spent the rest of the day apologizing for her! Some People!
I went to my cousin-in-law's baby shower last
month. My sisters-in-law andI chipped in and got lots of small/medium gifts. On the day of
the shower, I had to run out and get more wrapping paper, since I had run out when
wrapping the gift the night before. (There were about 3 med/lg items to wrap). I picked
out 2 special bows, and made the packages look very nice.
Well, when it was time to open the gifts, it was like a free for all! All the
Mom-to-be's helpers were unwrapping the gifts, and handing them to her to announce what
she got! I was so annoyed that I took the time to make the packages look nice, and she
didn't even see them! She didn't have the "thrill" of taking off the wrapping
paper to see what she had gotten! I had forgotten that those "helpers" did the
same thing at her Bridal shower!!! And in all the confusion, I never received a thank you
until one of my sister's in law mentioned it to her! Still no thank you for the Baby
Shower, but it's only been about a month!
I wanted to host a baby shower for Louise, one of my dearest friends. I
had already begun to plan it, when I heard via the grapevine that Jerlyn, another of
Louise's friends didn't like the timing of the shower I was planning. Now even though I
hardly know Jerlyn, I decided to be the bigger person and call Jerlyn to get her input.
Jerlyn informed me that SHE was planning to do a shower and so I needn't bother, as she
was planning to invite all the same folks I'd be inviting. She said that if I wanted to
co-host the shower with her, I was more than welcome to do so as she didn't have two
pennies to rub together and would welcome the financial help (needless to say, she said
nothing about just thinking it would be fun to co-host with me--it was all about money to
her, apparently). So I swallowed my pride and agreed to co-host with Jerlyn.
Several days before the shower, I ordered flowers to be sent to Jerlyn as a thank-you
from me for having the shower at her teeny-weeny cramped apartment. I asked that the
flowers be delivered the day before the shower, after making certain that Jerlyn would
actually be there to accept them.
I arrive at Jerlyn's house several hours before the party, at her request, to help her
put the "finishing touches" on the shower games, food, etc. Bear in mind that I
had already made 3/4 of the food at home (I work as a chef, so she asked me to do this and
I happily agreed). I already felt that I had done an awful lot of work, but as Jerlyn was
physically hosting the shower, I did want to help her get last-minute things done before
the guests arrived. Well, the "finishing touches" she'd referred to on the phone
turned out to include picking up dirty socks off the living room floor, dealing with her
two-year old bratty niece who she was babysitting that morning at her apartment (!),
vacuuming the apartment, scrubbing the kitchen floor, Windexing the bathroom, and helping
Jerlyn's husband paint their front door! Not exactly what I was dressed for or prepared to
do, but I gritted my teeth and pitched in even though I felt these were exceedingly
unreasonable things to ask and should have been done ahead of time by Jerlyn herself. Not
a single word was said about the flowers (several dozen tulips)--not even when Jerlyn
asked me to arrange them in a vase did she even acknowledge that they were from me or
thank me for them!
The shower guests arrive, including the guest of honor, my dear friend Louise. Louise
is very dear, and bills and coos over every gift. I remembered when I had my twins that I
wished someone had taken the time to get ME a gift, instead of only gifts for the baby--so
I'd spent the money to buy not only three baby outfits, but had also bought Louise a
$50.00 gift certificate at her favorite clothing store so she could buy herself something
pretty after the baby was born. She LOVED this and went on and on about it.
The shower eventually ends, the guests go home, Jerlyn and I clean up, and I depart.
Days go by, weeks go by, over a month goes by. I hear NOTHING from either Jerlyn or Louise
in terms of settling up our financial commitment (Jerlyn) or in terms of a thank-you note
for the gifts (Louise). Finally, over seven weeks later, I get a cursory thank-you from
Louise in which she doesn't even refer to the gift certificate, and I get a check with no
note from Jerlyn. I think that will be the last baby shower I ever give, on my own or
co-hosting with someone else. It ain't worth the grey hair!
Hello all. Well, I've been reading your page with interest today and have to post
this story. My brother got married a few years ago and did an elopement sort of
thing. No big deal, they just thought the money spent would be a waste (which I can
attest to!). So when they were pregnant with their first child, my sister-in-law's
sister, me and my sister decided to give her a really nice baby shower. We had it at
my house. I got a sitter for my kids. We had an evening shower with a
gourmet spread (made by US), including watermelons carved as baby carriages, marinated
& grilled aparagus, a shrimp tower and cocktails for the non-pregnant guest. We
had over 50 in attendance. It cost us hundreds of dollars.
My sister-in-law's mother shows up LATE. She brought one stupid K-Mart outfit for
her grandchild. Never lifted a finger to assist with a thing, got drunk with another
guest none of us really knew and LEFT EARLY. People are replusive creatures.
My husband's brother got married several years
ago. His wife, Lori, is nice enough but seems a bit lost on proper social niceties, etc.
They had a big wedding and invited every person remotely related to them on both
sides of the family. One year later, it is time for Lori's baby shower. Her
relatives plan a huge shower for her, to be held in a community hall because no one had
room to accommodate all the people they invited (we're talking far-flung distant
relatives, old-lady aunts in nursing homes, anyone in any way related to this couple was
invited to this shower!). We (meaning our MIL, her daughters and other DILs) RSVP'd
promptly and chipped in together to buy a fancy and pricey baby stroller, and each of us
also bought small gifts to give individually.
During this time, our MIL is getting more and more disgusted with Lori because all
these relatives from our side of the family are calling her complaining about "the
nerve" of Lori's family to expect them to come out there with yet another gift when
they hadn't heard anything about the wedding gift they had given a year earlier! That's
right, Lori had never sent out thank-you notes for her wedding, and now, a year later,
these relatives finally hear from Lori again only to be invited to give another gift. (It
should be noted that this was not a surprise baby shower, Lori was in on the plans and
provided the guest list for her husband's side of the family.)
MIL is being so distant to Lori that finally another SIL takes Lori aside and tells her
what MIL is upset about. Lori reacts by giggling and saying, "Oh yeah, I never did
send thank-you notes for my wedding, did I?"
Cut to day of shower. We ILs arrive at the appointed place to find Lori's family
assembled and two cousins from our side of the family sitting way apart from everyone else
and looking terrified. Lori's family sits, stone-faced, staring straight ahead. One or two
look over when we come in, see that they don't know us, and turn their heads again without
a word. No one speaks to us, welcomes us in any way, introduces herself, nothing. They
just sit. Our cousins tell us that they have not said a word to them. One cousin says that
when they got there, they asked was this the shower for Lori. They say that one or two
people mouth "Yeah" without even looking at them. The rest just ignored them.
Then the cousins tried to introduce themselves and say that they were ignored! Completely!
Like, no one even acknowledged that they were speaking!
Anyway, we sit in silence for a while until Lori flounces in, complaining that this is
"too much running around" for her in her delicate condition, all the while being
flanked by her doting mother and sister who fuss over her like she is the only woman who's
ever been pregnant. Lori gets all settled and comfy and begins tearing into the gifts.
(No, "Hello, everybody, so nice of you to come.")
Finally, the present-opening is over and the guests go help themselves to the buffet.
After we return to our seats, Lori's family take their chairs and TURN THEIR BACKS TO US!
Completely. Leaving us sitting there looking at their turned backs. They then begin to
converse among themselves, quietly, so we couldn't hear. However, it didn't stay that way.
They begin to argue. It gets louder and louder. People are shouting, chairs are being
pushed aside, people are crying, storming out, etc. We ILs are just trying to figure out a
graceful way to exit, quickly! Lori comes over to us, tearfully complaining about
"these animals" she's related to. Our MIL, who is very outspoken, takes this
opportunity to inform Lori that more of our side of the family would have come if she had
thanked them properly for the wedding gifts last year and that thank-you notes are
expected this time. Then we get out of there as fast as we can!
About a month later, I get a card from Lori that says "Thank you for sharing in
the preparation for our newborn baby. Love, Lori and John." OK, I think, it's my
understanding that the thank-you note is supposed to be personal (i.e. "Dear
Mary") and should mention the specific gift, but at least she wrote one. Later, I am
at my MIL's house and see that she received a note too. She tells me to read it, and, sure
enough, it says "Thank you or sharing in the preparation for our newborn baby. Love,
Lori and John." Yes, it seems that Lori just wrote the same thing in all the
notes, to save herself time and trouble!
That's about all there is to the story. Except that Lori spent the next three years
complaining to us about the stroller we gave her. "It doesn't work right, it doesn't
fold right, it's such a pain, don't ever buy this kind again . . ." We were all
relieved when the kid finally outgrew it!
The Realms of Ingratitude know no bounds....
My SIL recently had a baby boy. Usually, our church provides meals for the first week
or two for new mothers and those in special circumstances. Well, I asked them if any
arrangements had been made, and they replied in the negative. So, I went to the store and
bought all the ingredients for a really nice and nutritious meal for the new family. I
spent about 4 hours making it all, complete with home made corn bread and desserts. I
called ahead to let them know that I was coming over, and to have someone have the door
open at the bottom of their secure apartment building.
I got out of the car and struggled with the hot dishes, and bags. I didn't have long to
wait before I see my SIL's father open the door for me. He didn't offer to take anything
off my hands - even though you could plainly see I was struggling. I had made enough food
to last them that day, and maybe some leftovers. After I had lugged all the food up the 3
flights of stairs, I found a crowd of my SIL's immediate family in the small apartment.
Her two youngest brothers (13 &15) were smack in the middle of the floor, playing
video games loudly. I had to step over them, since they refused o move, the whole time
loudly complaining that I was in the way.
My SIL's mother gestured vaguely that I could put the "stuff" in the kitchen,
and serve it to them out in the living room! Not only did I not get a thank you of ANY
sort, at the time or since, I was asked to leave "you're not staying to eat, are
you?" No, of course not. I also had asked if I could have my dishes back in a few
days - no need to drop them off, I'd pick them up. When I came to pick them up, she gave
them back to me still crusted up with old food. Thanks a lot.
Page Last Updated May 15, 2007