Etiquette Hell = Where the ill-mannered deserve to go

Contents

Main Page/Home
 

The Faux Pas Archives
Wedding Etiquette

Bridesmaids and Beastmen
Bridal Showers
Bridezillas and Groomonsters
Faux Pas of the Year
Gimme, Gimme, Gimme
Guests From Hell
Tacky Invitations
Ooops!
Wedding Rugrats
Just Plain Tacky
Tacky Toasts
Thank You Notes From Hell
Tacky Vendors
Wedding From Hell
Wicked Witches of the Wedding
Perfect Bride
Bridesmaid Dress Incinerator

 

 

Everyday Etiquette

Baby Showers
The Dating Game
Ooops! Foot in Mouth Disease
Funeral Etiquette
Gimme Hell
Guests
Holiday Hell
Neighbors
Just Plain Tacky
It's all Relatives
Every Day RugRats
Road Rage

Business Etiquette

Bad Business Etiquette
Co-workers
Merchants of Etiquette Hell
Bad Bosses
Customers

Faux Pas of the Year

 

Web


EtiquetteHell.com

 

Press Room/Contact

 

Gimme Gimme

1999 Archive
Jan-Jun 2000 Archive
Jul-Dec 2000 Archive 1
Jul-Dec 2000 Archive 2


 

 A few years ago while my husband was in graduate school a classmate of his became engaged to a very nice woman from a very wealthy family. As the wedding - an extremely lavish affair rumored to cost somewhere in the high two hundred thousand dollar range - was to be held a thousand miles away and most if not all of the financially challenged students would be understandably unable to attend, the bride-to-be decided to hold a local, pre-wedding reception/dinner party to share their joy with their many friends. The event was take place at a very expensive, trendy restaurant at six p.m. We were on time and among the first to arrive, before the "buffet" had even been set out, and we ordered drinks. Which we were informed we would have to pay for. I ordered a soda, and had to pay $3.50 for it. The "buffet" consisted of cheese, crackers, and grapes, enough to provide a snack for perhaps half of the invitees, most of whom had not eaten in anticipation of an actual meal. Time passed and no appearance was made by the bride and groom to be, and the owner of the restaurant - who had somehow been led to believe that we would all be ordering expensive actual meals on our own and had closed the restaurant to the public and was therefore losing vast amounts of money - began asking US if we knew where they were. Finally, a good two hours late, the couple arrived, cheerfully announcing they had stopped on the way to have a special, romantic dinner. They stayed for perhaps half an hour, gathered up their gifts and left. The kicker? Never got a thank you for the stupid expensive gift we couldn't afford but gave anyway, because we were embarrassed the bride, being so wealthy, would think we were cheap. I did not make this up. Love, love, LOVE the website, especially as I now prepare to be my sister's Matron of Honor! Thanks.     gimme0102-01


My best childhood friend recently got married and the whole affair was so riddled with greed that it makes me sick to think about it still. The bride, who I will call Kelly, had always been kind of a princess, but I was utterly shocked at the lengths she and her fiancé, I'll call him Kevin, went to during this time of supposed bliss. Although there were many instances of blatant overkill, I will stick to what happened with the wedding gifts. Although they were not paying one dime for the cost of the wedding, for months I was subjected to hearing about how much they expected everyone to spend on their gifts. It seemed that regardless of a person's monetary situation, Kevin and Kelly expected each person to double the cost of their plate, as well as their guest's, for the gift (which by the way was no small expense due to the hall that they chose) Well, the wedding day came and things went well (meaning that the two keep their greediness to themselves) until the end. They were so anxious to open their gifts that they LEFT THEIR OWN WEDDING EARLY, totally ignoring the fact that their was a gift opening party planned for the next day. Well, when the happy couple finally finished, they joined the members of the wedding party in the designated after-hours hotel room and proceeded to tell everyone just how much they had gotten in gifts! At this point I didn't want to give them my gift, but felt it was rude not to, so the next afternoon I brought it over to their house anyway. As soon as I gave them the gift, Kevin says, "We don't even need to open it-it's the punch bowl set." It seems that they had been looking up their gift registries a few times a week to see what had been bought for them, and by process of elimination, knew what my gift was. After that I hardly received a thank you, which was equally frustrating as I am at university right now and don't really have the money to be buying expensive punch bowl sets. Needless to say, I don't speak to them anymore, though I did receive a thank you card sometime after the wedding-which totally excluded extending any thanks to my live-in boyfriend.
Gimme0217-01


I got married on the beach in Bermuda in June 2000-we'll call me June. It was a great wedding with just our immediate family. We held a reception in July at my parent's home. One of my grade school girlfriends came to the party, we'll call her Cruella :-), she had also just been married, a week after my wedding. I soon found out that she wasn't much of a friend at all. As the party wound down and just close friends remained, we opened gifts. In one box we received four tumblers in a pattern that was like nothing we had registered for-- and the lady who gave them was there when we opened them. She said, "Oh, how strange, the store must have switched the boxes- that was the present for Cruella!" The lady who had given the presents has been a friend of my mom's for over 10 years & had bought a pretty nice present for my husband & I. She had only known Cruella's mom for about a year and had bought her a nice, but less expensive gift. We later found out that when Cruella opened (my) present she said, "Oh, this is June's pattern." But then instead of giving it back to her Mom's friend (since it was obviously the wrong present), she took it back to the department store. When we went to the department store to exchange the stuff intended for Cruella, the clerk said she remembered Cruella. The clerk told her that the boxes must have been switched and what was in each box. Cruella realized that the box she had was worth more than the one she was intended to have. She exchanged my present for a bunch of her own china. I still can't believe that her greed overwhelmed her ability to do the right thing. I'm just sad that she teaches- I hope she doesn't pass on her ethics to anybody's children.   Gimme0104-01


My friend's daughter got married a couple of months ago. I asked where she was registered and got a list of five stores. I went to a discount store first and found the list there was 200-odd items long. They ranged from rubber spatulas to pricey patio furniture. There were more than one of some items listed. (Two different brands of food processors for example.) I decided to go to a national department store next. The list there had kitchen appliances, two different lawn mowers and two more brands of food processors. That got me curious, so I looked at each of the stores on the list. There were TV sets, furniture, carpets, and a refrigerator with all the bells and whistles. Also lots more of every small appliance imaginable. Now I like having a registry so I can tell what other people have gotten, but how are you supposed to sort that out when they register at several stores? Can they really seriously think that anyone is going to get them major appliances? I'm guessing that the total number of items requested at the five stores was well over 1000. Does anyone else fine that excessive?
Gimme0331-01


I was MOH at my "friend's" wedding. They were saving every penny for a new home, so my husband offered to do the photography. We bought six rolls of pro film, he spent all day taking pics. We paid for all the film processing (enlargements, no less) and when the pics were back, I called the bride. We made a dinner date for the four of us. They loved the pictures, absolutely saved the day for them (the photographer they hired was only for the ceremony and took the pictures in about 4 minutes [cheap Las Vegas chapel affair]). After dinner, they not only didn't offer to pay for the film processing (receipt on the front of the packages), but they also divided the dinner check. Never received a thank you card for our gift ($100), all the expenses for the wedding, or for our photo work. We were one of three guests that even bothered with a wedding gift. I can't even fathom this cheapness. One damn card, you can buy 'em at KMart in packs of 10 for $3.00. I am stunned by the lack of courtesy and respect. Don't hold your breath waiting for that housewarming present! Gimme0402-01


We have been invited to a wedding this weekend. My fianc√© is the best man. I have been ask to tend to the gift table.The groom called and told us that I am invited to the rehearsal dinner but I will have to pay for my food. They are only paying for people in the wedding.   Gimme0514-01


I was a bridesmaid in my (then) best friend's "Bea"'s wedding. A few months earlier, I had been married in a very small, private ceremony. From the time I arrived at the church, Bea continually commented how much nicer her enormous, and (in my opinion) garish wedding was than mine. Before the ceremony, she sent the bridesmaids out at least ten times to check how many presents were on the present table. The ceremony itself was god-awful, but in the usual tacky wedding kind of way. True tackiness set in when we got to the reception. They had a dollar dance, but not the usual kind where everyone contributes money and then gets a dance with the bride/groom. No, this was a dance where everyone threw in money and then only the last person got to dance with the bride. To this day, I'm still not sure of the theory behind this. Anyway, everyone worked it out so the adorable little five year old ringbearer would be the one to dance with the bride. Bea danced exactly 30 seconds with the kid, then walked over to the best man, grabbed the money away from him, and stood in the middle of the dance floor counting it over and over. Meanwhile, the groom "Jay" had gotten hopelessly drunk. Fortunately (ha) someone had the foresight to arrange for karaoke at this reception, so everyone had to sit for a half hour and listen to the drunk, out-of-tune groom warble away. I tried to leave, but was told that I couldn't because I was the bridesmaid. Finally, hubby and I snuck out. After this fiasco, Bea and I drifted apart. I just heard from her the other day. She and Jay are divorcing because he was sleeping with at least three other women. I'm glad I concentrated on picking the right groom instead of throwing the perfect huge wedding! Gimme0227-01


My husband used to be a wedding photographer before we were married. He now only on rare occasions takes pics of family members weddings, if asked. Well, he was never formally asked to take pics of his sister's step-sons wedding. It was assumed that since he was coming to the wedding (instead of attending a campout with the scouts) that he would take the wedding pics. He bought the film, worked hard at taking the pictures, had the film processed and bought an album to display the pics in and gave all this to the bride and groom. They looked at the pictures, made a comment that some of the pictures were blurry, then set it aside and said nothing further. My husband told them the the cost was $275.00. That was just the cost of the film, processing and the album. None of that price was a "fee" for taking the pictures. They said absolutely nothing. Nothing about paying him, not even a "thank you." In addition, we gave them a $50.00 check in a very nice card and have not received a thank you. Did they even get the card? I'm pretty mad about this. My husband is not saying much. He's annoyed but what can he do? I'm thinking if this couple can't even send a thank you note, I don't hold much hope of them reimbursing my husband for the cost of the wedding pictures. Thanks, had to get this off my chest. Gimme0710-01


I was a bridesmaid for one of my good friends. The wedding went perfectly, no problems. However, at the reception after dinner was served I noticed the bride & groom were missing. I asked where is Susie-Q to the maid of honor and was told they were in their room counting their wedding gift money. While the guests partied, the bride & groom were signing the gift checks!!!! If you see their wedding pictures, they are not in one from the reception!!! Gimme0819-01


Page Last Updated May 15, 2007