Etiquette Hell = Where the ill-mannered deserve to go

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"I think this site is so underrated and everyone needs to read a few posts and learn how not act. This whole site serves as a wonderful cautionary tale of what not to do. "

Guestzillas

2000 Archive
Jan-Jun 2000 Archive
Jul-Dec 2000 Archive
2001 Archive
2002 Archive
Jan - Jul 2003 Archive
Jul - Dec 2003 Archive
Jan-Jun 2004 Archive


 

Three years ago this coming August, I went to the wedding of two very close friends of mine. I am reminded of this story now because of an upcoming anniversary party, planned to allow the bride and groom to relive their wedding reception.

Now let me go back, to the day of the wedding. My then BF and I arrived at the church on time, and walked in amongst all the other guests. One seemed to have appointed himself usher (let it be known that the couple chose not to have bridesmaids, a best man or ushers due to lack of money for dresses and such). The busybody asked us if we were friends of the Bride or the Groom. I answered truthfully that we were friends of both, and a frown appeared on his face. "You'd better wait until last then!", he said and turned his attention to the next guests. 

The lack of ushers to seat guests is a considerable error in planning.  They do not need to be finely dressed in tuxes to perform this duty.  A nice suit or a button down shirt, tie and dress pants will be fine, too.  It's a shame a guest felt there was enough chaos to justify his intervention.

Somewhat peeved, my BF and I sat down with some college friends of mine, and tried to be inconspicuous. The ceremony itself was going fine until the minister asked the couple to exchange rings (they'd written their own vows up to this point) for some reason, most everybody stood up and began loudly cheering and whooping. The couple looked excruciatingly embarrassed and the minister had to wait at least five minutes before he could say; "I now pronounce you husband and wife." This done, the couple kissed and the minister said pointedly: "Now you can clap!" I couldn't believe how rude everyone had been, during the sincere and beautiful service.

The last straw came later at the reception. The couple were (and still are) Salsa dancing teachers, and so were a lot of their guests. The DJ catered for both dancers and non-dancers alike, but my BF and I (who are very keen Salsa dancers) were infuriated by the attitude of the other guests. They stood on the dance floor, smoking and drinking, making it completely impossible for anyone to dance. The bride had designed her dress with a pair of lace pants so that their first dance could be fittingly, an energetic salsa display. However, these rude guests didn't give them any space to dance, and they were confined to a close-hold thing barely moving their feet. The annoyance on their faces was obvious, and this was compounded by the fact that these particular guests have the nerve to complain about: "Too much stupid salsa music!"

My first thought was, "Was there enough seating and open area off the dance floor for these guests?"  Most people prefer to sit while chatting and drinking and the presence of so many people milling about on the dance floor does raise suspicions in my mind that perhaps there was nowhere else for these guests to be.  And the DJ can clear the floor with one announcement of the first dance. If this was done and the guests absolutely refused to move off the dance floor , either the bride and groom have chosen to associate themselves with some rather boorish people or there simply was no other place for these people to go.  

Truly ignorant and utterly rude guests from hell, don't you think? Now they're consigned forever to Ehell! P.S. Strangely enough, I am reluctant about 'reliving' the night!

Guests0706-04


My wife told me about your site and we agreed we had to write our tale of the guest from hell at our wedding in 1999. Let me give you a little background. My wife's parents are fairly wealthy people, but very down to earth (they worked for their money) as is my MIL's brother; my MIL's sister "Hattie" is another story. She is twelve years younger than my MIL and a spoiled brat and a snob who has never worked a day in her life. Her husband "Lewis", a person of limited social skills, lives on a trust fund and, because of this, she thinks she is old money and the picture of class. 

When my wife and I got engaged, Hattie and Lewis were horrified. They berated me for my background (solid middle class) and my profession (police officer). They told her that I was too uneducated and too provincial to measure up. My wife reminded them that we both have degrees from the University of Texas (Hook 'em, Horns- sorry, I had to get that in), that I am a former Marine with combat experience in Panama and Kuwait and that both Hattie and Lewis flunked out of college. Well, that set them off. 

For the next year, they tried to sabotage our plans and, when that didn't work, they tried to buy their way in, offering my in-laws, who graciously paid for the wedding, financial assistance. Luckily, my in-laws did not fall off the turnip truck.     
Fast forward to the wedding. It was a beautiful March day in Dallas and we had the ceremony and reception in my brother's spacious house. Surprisingly, Hattie and Lewis, although not happy about our nuptials, were surprisingly quiet. However, they did not come through the receiving line and at the reception and at the reception, they told anyone who would listen that our marriage would not last. However when they unknowingly repeated this to my uncle, he gave them a piece of his mind. Then my MIL got wind of this, took her to a private place and tore into her. Soon afterwards Hattie and Lewis made a quiet exit and left the rest of the guests to have a blast at the reception.      

But, wait, there's more. Hattie would intermittently call my MIL and asked when we were going to get divorced. She also had to divorce lawyer call my wife at her work. But the kicker came when Lewis called me after my daughter (who, along with my wife, is the light of my life) was born and suggested a paternity test. I snapped and told him that he and Hattie were to never call me again. When my in-laws heard of this, they told the gruesome twosome that they would have the police haul them off if they ever came on their property.

Guests0712-04


My husband and I were married on a yacht. Although this sounds expensive the rental cost was very competitive to may other venues we looked at. To cut down costs we did not have a formal dinner but had very hearty and tasty hors d' oeuvres and we also had an open bar. I think that may have been our only mistake. 

The ceremony was beautiful, everything we could have hoped for, because the yacht had limited room the ceremony was on the top deck and when it was over everyone went to the bottom deck for drinks while they broke down the chairs and set up some tables and cleared room for the dance floor and hors d' oeuvres back up on the top deck. We know that our friends like to drink so we were wary of the open bar but thought that everyone would be on their best behavior, after all it is a wedding. 

This we could have never predicted. The boat only had 2 restrooms, one of which was very hard to find so some of our guests just couldn't wait and decided to drop their undies and hang their butt over the side and pee off the top deck. This actually happened on 2 different occasions throughout the night by 2 different people. Needless to say that the people on the lower deck got quite a shock and a peep show including my preteen brother when they looked up to see if it was raining. Luckily I did not know this was going on and was told later by my MOH who had to console some disturbed, yet amused guests. It could have turned out worse but luckily our friends and family (and us) have a good sense of humor, a warning though, be careful who you invite to a wedding especially if it's an open bar!

Guests0713-04


I have been dating the same man for 3 years, I'll call him Jack.  When we first started dating Jack introduced me to a friend of his named Scott.  Jack and I live in different cities and on occasion I would share a meal or phone conversation with Scott.  We became friends on our own accord.  He confided in me, I confided in him and we enjoyed each others company.  During the 3 year relationship with Jack, Jack would temporarily break up with me for 1 day to one week at a time.  We would always get back together...that is a story in itself.  

Here is why I'm writing though.  Scott met a girl and became engaged.  At the time he and his bride to be were picking out invitations, he phoned me to ask how he should send out mine and Jack's wedding invitation.  I thanked him for asking me and asked him to send Jack an invitation and send me my own invitation.  I didn't want Jack to need a break the day of the wedding and not take me, which has happened before...which is why Scott asked me what he did.  The invitations were mailed and Jack got his, I received nothing.  Jack's invitation was addressed to "Jack and Guest"....I never received anything.  I was humiliated and embarrassed.  Turns out Scott said, if we were broken up, he would rather have Jack at the wedding versus me.  Jack has invited me to go to the wedding, I profusely declined! 

Guests0709-04


I was married last year and an acquaintance of mine came to the wedding with her new boyfriend. They had met on the internet about 2 weeks prior. She told me the day before the wedding that they were also getting married and had joked with each other that they should ask me if we could all have a "double" ceremony since we had already made all the plans and were ready to get married! The wedding day came and the friend and "fiancé" were a little late so they were in the balcony above where the ceremony was held. I was told by some of my guests that they made out during the whole wedding...not just kissing but REALLY getting into it.   The reception was at the same location and they continued to basically grope, molest and try to have a live sex show ALL during the reception. I did witness it myself on two occasions (and they were in different spots each time!)  

But the kicker was when we got our wedding video back and were watching a part of the dancing....what can you see plain as day in the background?,,, that's right....the liplocked couple getting after it!  And just to put the icing on the cake, these people are BIG people and were VERY noticeable by not only their size but their actions.....how embarrassing!

Guests0806-04


 

Our wedding was held in my hometown though my husband, his family and I lived in another state. Invitations went out, RSVP's came in from his immediate family saying they would travel the distance to attend. His brother was to be our best man. We flew in early and during a pre-wedding dinner for my close family and friends a few days before the wedding, my husband calls his family to check on their travel progress (they drove). The only cell number he has is his older sister's. Where are you, he asks. Oh, I'm on [road by her house]. What? Why are you on [road by your house]? Didn't they tell you? I'm not going to your wedding. Brother didn't show up either. My husband was crushed and his brother and sister still haven't told him why they didn't go to our wedding, or apologized for their strange behavior. The weird thing is, his whole family knew the brother and sister RSVP'd yes but never planned to go and they DIDN'T TELL US. Needless to say, in-law relations are a bit strained for me.

Guests1216-04


 

 I was at a wonderfully elegant wedding reception that had a delicious champagne brunch. Carrot cake was served for dessert, tastefully in keeping with the brunch flavors and theme. Guests "Pat" and "Tricia" said to the other guests, "We drove 800 miles to attend her wedding, and she's not even serving us regular wedding cake! How inconsiderate!"

Guests0908-04


#1) The guest who was so ecstatic about attending that she RSVP’d immediately, and then the day before the event, told me she couldn’t come because she had to baby-sit her grandchildren.

#2) The co-worker who confided to a bridesmaid (also a coworker) that she couldn’t attend because she didn’t have the funds for a gift, and after she was assured that my future husband and I didn’t care about that (correct) she then announced that she would only come if her 12 year old daughter was invited, and the night before the wedding, demanded that her daughter’s friend be invited so her daughter would have someone to talk to at the wedding.  We compromised and said only the daughter could come. The friend came alone, after we paid the caterer for her daughter’s meal.

#3) All the guests at a table who took an entire disposable camera’s film taking photos of one of the women’s cleavage. Not to mention the four cameras that were NEVER returned.

#4) The BM who was also my sister who trumpeted frequently how she was the most beautiful woman in the wedding party.

#4) The BM who said she couldn’t afford a dress, after I had asked her at the time I asked her to be a BM, if this was a cost she would be able to handle, not to mention the fact that my only requirements were that my BM’s wear any pale green, tea length dresses, and white or pale shoes, and when I pulled strings with a local dressmaker and he made a dress as a favor to me at cost, SHE STILL COMPLAINED.

#5) The DJ who had a tantrum because the restaurant owner wouldn’t let him do some minor thing, leaving him to stomp his feet and run over to us, the newlywed’s, as soon as we walked through the door.

#6) My brother who rather than take the directions to the restaurant with him, decided to follow the limo from where we had our photos taken, and got lost, drove back to the hotel, and returned shouting at the top of his lungs about the ‘retard’ limo driver who ‘made an illegal turn’ (he hadn’t) while we, the happy couple, were being announced to the guests.

#7) The pastor who told us a week before the wedding that he decided he couldn’t marry us because my husband-to-be was divorced, and while it wasn’t against our faith, it was against his personal beliefs.

#9) My FH’s foster brother who brought a date to FH’s bachelor dinner.  At a steakhouse. And said date was a hostile vegan who voiced her contempt at all meat eaters within earshot. At a steakhouse. Nice. She didn’t wear a bra to the reception either. Tacky.

#10) Special thanks to the florist who arrived hours late, with all the flowers moments before we were to leave my parents’ home, and after we had spent well over $1000.00 in flowers, more business than he had ever seen, reminded us that we owed him for two extra long-stem roses and expected to be paid immediately.

#11) The photographers, a husband and wife team, who demanded to know where THEIR place cards were, who were asked to make sure they took photos of a favorite aunt and uncle (who had paid for part of the wedding) and managed to not get them in ANY of the photos.

Also, the wife half of the team was told not to enter my bedroom yet because I didn’t have my bra on, and proceeded to shout ‘c’mon, c’mon, we don’t have time to wait for you’ and broke the door in.

#12) My FH supervisor who was the ONLY guest from my husband’s company, demanded that we invite his sister-in-law, and possibly his mother-in-law, because they couldn’t be separated from his wife for 5 hours. The SIL came. The MOL stayed home to watch the kids. Who would have come uninvited with all the rest of them, if my FH hadn’t mentioned the adults only rule, that his supervisor somehow missed the first several times my FH mentioned it.

Another note: We got married in the beautiful Pennsylvania Pocono mountains, knowing that even the summers could be chilly, and thought it might rain (but is good luck in my family) in mid-May but didn’t expect snow showers, which began when we stepped outside the church, as if the angels were throwing confetti! It really was beautiful!

Guests0808-04


 

My wedding was originally planned for the month of my parent’s wedding, as it was a family custom. My mother (my best friend) was diagnosed with terminal cancer, and had been given less than a year to live, so my future husband and I moved our wedding date up from 11 months to three months.

We hustled, but with the help of my MOH and no help whatsoever from my sister and another ‘good’ friend (who in all fairness was 7 months pregnant) who were my two bridesmaids, my wedding day arrived with little trouble, save that my poor mother could barely stand, and I was on meds for panic attacks, due to my mother’s illness. 

A couple that my mother and I had been friends with since I was a child were invited, along with several other couples from our old church. They were very spiritual, fundamentalist, and while I had drifted away from that particular church, per se, I had never stopped having a relationship with God, although they certainly thought I had, and it was cause for tension between us. They soon moved from being ‘spiritual’ to off-the-deep-end cult-like, but I had hoped they would behave themselves.  I seated them all at a table in the corner, with the minister who married us (bless his heart, as you will see soon) in a tiny country chapel near my parent’s home.

The husband of my friend, unbeknownst to me was tucking religious tracts into all of our floral centerpieces, which were to be given as ‘prizes’ at the end of the reception. He also literally littered the men’s room with tracts. From what I understand, the wife did as well.

While we were dancing in a conga line around the room, he stopped the DJ at the head of the line and told him LOUDLY that what he was doing was wrong, he knew it was wrong, and that he should stop his line of work.  Also, that the music was from the pit of hell, or some such nonsense.

Later, while my husband and his brother were having a heart to heart discussion just outside the restaurant, under the awning, the same man confronted my new husband, and told him how he had to keep me in line, that he should never have ALLOWED me to plan such a sinful wedding reception, and that as the head of our family, he had to keep in charge, keep me right with God.

He sat with another religious husband at that table and clucked about all the lost souls at the reception and how obviously I had lost my way and my new husband had better keep a tight rein on me.  Together, they went from table to table and passed out tracts to my other wedding guests.

Unbeknownst to him, my mother had to witness all of these events, as the parents’ tables were seated near the ‘religious’ table.  My mother had been unable to eat or drink anything and by the grace of God and her own steel will, remained gracious throughout.

These guests left early, and thankfully none of our other guests were offended.

At the end of the night I finally sat down with my parents as I was to go home with them, and my husband planned to collect his things at the hotel, pick me up, and we were to head off to our honeymoon (local due to Mom’s illness.)

At this point my parents recounted the behavior of the guest, which I had been oblivious to due to my very busy photographer, pulling my new husband and I here and there. I was dismayed about the guest’s rudeness, but more than anything upset that my mother saw the whole thing.

Two weeks later, while I was staying at my parent’s house, tending to my mother, that wedding guest called up asking to speak with my father. He offered an extremely lame apology and my father said, you owe my wife an apology and my daughter and her husband an apology, and hung up in disgust.

When my mother died, people came from all over to pay their respects, many traveling hundreds of miles. This man and his wife, who were our dear friends so long ago, never even made a phone call.  Months later, the wife called me to say hello. She never mentioned my mother, or acknowledged her death (I was the one who made sure they were notified) and never apologized for her husband’s horrible behavior at our wedding.

There is a time and place for everything. I guess that verse wasn’t in their Bible.

Guests0808-04


 

I just love reading all the stories on your site! The following tale comes under the heading “Guest From Hell”. There were many other bad behaviors exhibited at this wedding reception (by the bride), but this is the worst.   

My close childhood friend “C” asked me to play some music at her wedding. I volunteered to write a song for her and the groom (whom I had never met) and performed it with a mutual friend during the ceremony as requested. I also recorded this song and presented the CD to the couple as their wedding gift. C asked me to be in the wedding pictures after the ceremony, which were being taken in a park next to the catering hall.   

While these pictures were being taken, C’s sister’s new husband (“K”) was drinking several beers in the parking lot. Fast forward an hour or so and my fiancée “B” was dancing on the dance floor with some of the other guests when K ran over to him and slapped his butt. I don’t just mean a tap, I mean an after-scoring-the-touchdown-that-won-the-game painful SLAP. Now keep in mind that the only time they had met or spoken was the night before for a two-minute conversation.  B was obviously surprised as K ducked behind some other guests trying to hide (K is not actually 8 years old, but in his mid-30s). B asked K not to do that again. 

Ten minutes later, K slaps B again, and again ducks behind some other guests. B again calmly asks K not to do that. Half and hour later as B is waiting at the bar to get a drink, K comes over and pinches B’s nipple. Now B is understandably upset. C’s cousin sees this happening from across the room and takes B outside to cool down. I follow them, wondering what is going on. The cousin explains that this is how K behaves and we shouldn’t hold it against C. Then K comes up to B, the cousin and I and asks B “do you want to roll around on the ground or are you going to apologize?”. B calmly says “Are YOU going to apologize?” and K reluctantly says “sorry” while looking at his shoes at holding out his hand, which B shakes.  

 I was quite upset at the treatment that B was getting from the bride’s family. I felt that although they didn’t know B, they had known me for 20 years and B and I deserved at least a modicum of respect. I walked over to C’s sister and told her the story as I believed that she should be aware of her husband’s behavior. She accused me of trying to ruin her sister’s wedding for her. She then tried to say that B started it and wanted to fight K. I told her that HER husband started it. She said that this is how K behaves. I told her that his behavior was “immature, inappropriate and unacceptable”.   

A few minutes later, the groom took me aside. He told me that C’s sister told him that B said “negative things” about the military to her. Of course he couldn’t tell me what those “negative things” were. Now, keep in mind that C had just finished serving in the military and her groom was also in the military, as were most of their friends. B and I had in fact been having a great time with these guests, and they all seemed to like us.  I told the groom this, and said that we would never say anything negative about the military, especially in present company, and besides that B had never spoken to C’s sister in his entire life. I told the groom what K had been doing to B and how B had handled it.   The groom now told me that he didn’t know who to believe – his bride’s sister or her oldest friend. He asked me not to tell C about this. He also suggested that we stay away from K, who even at that moment was sending evil looks in B’s direction. B and I felt so uncomfortable that we left the reception.  

A month or so later, after C’s honeymoon, after she had settled in to her new home overseas with her husband, I emailed C and asked her if I could tell her about something that was bothering me. She (as always) replied that I could tell her anything anytime. I then told her the story of K and his behavior. C apologized profusely and said that I should have told her at the time so she could have done something about it. 

Guests0812-04


 

My partner and I planned a commitment ceremony and naturally wanted to invite our dearest friends. In order to plan accordingly, we requested RSVPs. We planned on a ceremony at the state capital and a lovely 1920's themed sit down dinner at an Art Deco restaurant. One guest responded by notifying us the he was bringing 4 extra guest (3 who we did not even know and 1 was his boss) I have never particularly cared for her and had not seen her in over 20 years. 

Our friend explained that he knew a couple who enjoyed theme parties and had invited them. I explained that this was a special event and not some general party, as such they were not invited. He continued to say that his boss (a tart at best) would not give him the day off unless she could come. I expressed my understanding and regret that he would not be able to attend. 

Several months later, he called and apologized for his faux pas. It seems that he had developed a snitty attitude after my refusal to acquiesce to his demands of bring his boss. I actually had informed him that he and his boss/date were welcome, but he refused to come. At some point, he had brought the matter up in vulgar conversation to some other long time friends who had the good form to explain that the error was his and not mine. I am quite sure his poor judgment was quite an embarrassment to him especially as he self -righteously spoke of his ill will toward me for retracting the invitation. 

Guests0816-04


 

Overall, my wedding was wonderful.  It was only that one of my guests, my friend Judy, loved to drink.   And the fact that we had an open bar was especially attractive.   Judy was never in very good health, (type I diabetic) and so having so much to drink was not the best idea for her.  But, no matter, Judy loved to live each day as though it was her last.  That must have been why she drank until she puked.  When we spoke days later she even remembered getting sick and it never occurred to her that she'd done anything the least bit unattractive; and offered no apologies.  She could be very entertaining to be around, and so those at her table must have helped her get drunk because she was blind and never could have gotten the drinks herself. 

Guests0903-04


 

My story is about my college roommate, “Molly,” and her wedding. The wedding was going to be in the couple’s hometown (six hours' drive from the university), where everyone worked in the steel mills together, and everyone knew each other. We arrived at the location, the wedding and the reception were to both be in one room that was not actually big enough for the number of people invited. We sat down at the round tables where dinner would be served, and watched the wedding from there, (which meant that at least 4 or 5 tables could not see the actual wedding because the backdrop of the ceremony blocked their vision). 

My fiancé and I arrived earlier than most guests, and since there were no place-markers, we simply sat down on the bride’s side of the room. It was soon very obvious that we were the only people from out of town. Every time people would sit down at our table, someone they knew would come in the door, and the entire group would then stand up and move to another table so that they could sit together. This happened no less than 7 times! I was beginning to feel like no one would sit with us, and we would be the only couple with a table all to ourselves. Finally, 2 minutes before the wedding began, another couple sat down across from us, but this was because the table with their friends was full, and they spent the entire evening leaning back so that they could talk with the people at the other table. My fiancé and I spent the evening talking only to each other.

The hall was segregated. Darren is black, and though I knew Molly’s immediate family had no issues with the racial differences, NO attempts were made at mingling throughout the evening. The black people sat on Darren’s side and the white people sat on Molly’s side, and the only time anyone went over to the other side was to get to the restroom. That was not the only form of segregation, however. The wedding was “evening formal,” and everyone in the wedding party was dressed to the T. So was Darren’s side of the hall. Molly’s side of the hall, on the other hand, tended toward torn jeans and NASCAR t-shirts (literally), with the most formal attire being a teenage boy who came in a sweater. Before the wedding even began, Molly’s friends and family lit up their cigarettes, and demanded that the waiters find some ashtrays for the table. By the time the wedding began, the smoke was so thick that all the photos I took actually came back visibly foggy. I am allergic to cigarette smoke, and right then I began calculating how long I would have to stay without hurting Molly’s feelings while still making the six-hour drive there and back worth my while.

The real kicker came when dinner was served. My fiancé and I are both vegetarians. Molly knew this and promised there would be enough vegetarian food for us. And there would have been, but the dinner was served “family style,” and the couple across the way decided that instead of splitting all the dishes, they would just keep half the food on their side and we could keep half on ours – we got the fried chicken half. I tried to tell them we were vegetarians, and could they pass some sides, but they said they couldn’t hear me over the music (which was devastatingly loud). My fiancé and I left directly after cake was served. We couldn’t take it another minute.

I would like to say in defense of the situation that Molly was a wonderful bride. During the ceremony, she looked at Darren as though there was no one else in the room. Afterwards, she made all her rounds graciously, so in love that despite the surroundings, I left the party feeling that Molly had really made the right decision marrying Darren. Years later, they’re still happily together.

Guests1214-04


 

My sister, her husband, my husband and myself attended a cousin's wedding in 2002.  It was an absolutely lovely and classy evening, from beginning to end, held in an old mill, where we could mingle inside and out.  They went to great lengths to make sure every guest had a perfect time. (Background, the MOG is our cousin).

When it came to seating at the reception, my sister and I were pleasantly surprised to find that our table was one of the front ones, near the bridal party.  We looked at the other tables and realized that the parents of bride and groom were right in front, with grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins at tables fanning out on either side.  We agreed that we felt 'honored' for being placed so close to the front and that they'd obviously spent time with the seating plan and considering family.  The food was set up near the other end of the hall and near that was the dance floor.

At our table was also the sister of the FOG and her two daughters.  The daughters were fun to talk to but their mother did nothing but complain (loudly) that we were "Stuck right up under the horse's a**" because we were not seated near the dance floor!  She kept saying "What the h*** kind of planning is this, making us sit so far from everything?  Right up under the horse's a**!" over and over.  My sister and I both said that we were seated close to the bridal table and that we felt honored and thought it was nice, but she just didn't get it.  What a miserable guest!

I was very thankful when the evening went to socializing with everyone mingling and moving to different tables to visit!

Guests1114-04


 

 Uncle gets remarried in an out of state wedding.  She is a divorcee, he a widower.  No one is invited to their wedding, even their grown kids.  Fast forward 3 months to my wedding and she has the nerve to show up in her wedding outfit, a white silk skirt suit.  No one wears white to a wedding except the bride! If she wanted to be "the bride" she should have had a larger wedding, not used mine as an excuse to wear her "dress".  More people need to read your site.

Guests1005-04


 

My friend, Darcy, was at a wedding this weekend in Minnesota.  The couple getting married no longer live in Minnesota but decided to hold the event there because the groom's family was still there.   

Apparently the bride and groom booked a church  that was quite small, and they could not accommodate all of their guests.  So they sent out two versions of the wedding invitation; A list -  people who were invited to both the church service and reception and B list - people only invited to the reception.  There was only one problem with their plan - - they did not explain the situation to the B list people.  The B list invitation just said the whole event started at 5 PM.   My friends, Darcy and Matt, were on the B list.  

They showed up at the event in this huge reception space and found that there were only 30 other people there.  They all stood around for an hour, figuring out the situation, and waiting for the wedding party and other guests to show up.    When the other guests and wedding party arrived (one hour late), they all acted like nothing unusual had happened.  No one mentioned the church service at all.   My friends went through the buffet and were about to sit at a table when a rude guest (and friend of Darcy and Matt) informed them that they had to sit "over there".  Apparently they were relegated to a B list table rather than be allowed to sit with the A list folks.           

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Not sure if this would fall under "Tacky Invitations" or "Guests from Hell" as it is technically a tacky response. Most hosts have at least one individual who responds that they will be in attendance with an uninvited guest. Shame on you who do this!!!!l But this particular guest deserves to be banished to inner most circle of e-hell.

My wedding invitations included a map & accommodations card, which included driving directions from major points north and south of the wedding location, as well as the names of several hotels at which discounted rates had been arranged. Save-the-date cards, with the same information, had been sent seven months prior to the wedding. On the back of one response card, returned 8 days before the wedding (and two weeks after a response should have been given), a female friend of my fiancée's family had composed the following:

"I have examined my travel options, and have ruled out flying or taking a train. I have decided to drive. Have John* (my fiancé's father) make me a hotel reservation for Friday and Saturday evening. I will be bringing my boyfriend, Jane* and Brandon*, and possibly a relief driver."

* Names were changed to protect the guilty

Sure enough, this "friend" is at my wedding, with her boyfriend and (presumably his) two children, Jane and Brandon. The invited guest-from-hell spills her glass of wine (white, thank goodness) down the front of my dress as she's being introduced to me at the reception, and WALKS AWAY!!!!! She was flustered, so instead of saying "oops, I'm so sorry" or offering me a napkin, she cuts herself off mid-sentence and slinks away, like maybe I wouldn't notice the wine dripping down my dress! I wasn't even mad about the wine, accidents happen. Maybe I could have told her if she hadn't run away from me.

Burn, burn burn!!!!

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The day I announced my engagement several of my "friends" told me my husband did not really love me. When he was out of the country they told me things along the line of he's not coming back and if he does it's only for a green card. I repeatedly tried to tell my so called friends that this was not true and proceeded to make my wedding plans. My maid of honor told me to my face that she hated my husband, without being married in the church God would never bless the marriage, and that the dress I picked out had to cost 600 dollars plus to look nice. Some of my acquaintances even said "I bet you $25 that the marriage ends in divorce after 2 months when they heard I was engaged." I bought a thirty dollar white dress on sale with the help of my mother's discount. My mother said "if he doesn't show up at least you'll have a nice white dress." 

The pastor of our church refused to marry people without marriage counseling, and my husband who was shy about his English refused marriage counseling on the grounds that he couldn't understand what he was saying because of the pastor's accent. The pastor in the end claimed that God had not told him that he approved the marriage and so he couldn't marry us. 

Meanwhile my family decided they did not believe I was actually getting married so I had to pay for the whole wedding myself while going to college for my bachelor's degree. The bride's maid became so rude and insulting I finally told her not to bother and that I no longer wanted to be friends. In the end I switched churches, the new church refused to do the ceremony there also because of lack of pre-marriage counseling but they agreed to let us have the reception there to celebrate the wedding. My mother two weeks before the ceremony called and told me we should have the reception at her house and that she had nothing to wear. The invitations had already been sent out. 

My husband arrived and we got married in the fall at a small wedding chapel after getting legally married at the courthouse. This was looked down on but we did it because we were extremely tight on money and we wanted a honeymoon. It's been nearly 2 years and my husband and I are in a lovely house now. The only real request I made was that nobody wear black and that everyone enjoy themselves at the wedding and reception. I couldn't invite more than ten people to the wedding because of financial problems and several people were offended. I explained as best I could and even showed them the INS papers, a certain amount of savings was required, and the chapel brochures. I invited a lot of people to the reception but still several people were offended. As it was my husband's work permit came through but had it not we would have needed the money for food and rent. After all this time all I can say is I learned who my real friends were and they were wonderful!!!  

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Page Last Updated May 15, 2007