and Silly Mistakes)
Jan-Jul 2003 Archive
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My husband and I were married in '98. At the time we had a
preacher working at my company and I requested that he perform the ceremony
since we didn't attend a specific church. He and his wife already had a vacation
planned for that day but he was kind enough to refer us to a new preacher at his
church. We would be the first wedding ceremony that this new preacher performed,
which I thought was wonderful!! The day came and everything went
perfectly. My little sister was married 2 years later and decided to
use the same preacher. Of course he remembered my husband and I since we were
his first wedding and we spent some time catching up before my sister's ceremony
began. Everything was going wonderfully until it came time for "Do you ____
take _____"........Yes, when speaking to my BIL he said my husband's name!!
Everyone there caught it and started giggling out loud. He stopped, completely
red faced, corrected himself and finished the ceremony without any other
problems. After it was over he apologized profusely to all of us, my husband and
myself, my sister and BIL, all of our parents. We assured him that it was
no problem at all, that we actually found it quite amusing and that at least we
had this great story to tell. To this day my husband will still tease my sister
& BIL and refer to her as his "other" wife!!
I’m currently planning my own wedding and, as many other
brides do, have been perusing wedding magazines and books (including yours!)
just about as fast as they come in. I was fairly stunned to find this
example of shocking tackiness from a wedding featured in a major wedding
magazine headlined by the name of a very famous homemaker/ex-con.
This wedding appeared to be a lovely and high brow affair at a
very expensive New York City hotel. The story repeated multiple times how
the bride and groom wanted to incorporate their senses of humor into the wedding
and had many cute examples of how they did so. That’s a fine idea, since
EHell is full of examples of how people can be way too serious about weddings
for their own good! However, let’s not confuse humor with tastelessness
and inappropriate timing… according to the story, in order to put guests “at
ease,” the bride & her father did not walk down the aisle to a traditional
wedding song. No, instead, they walked in to “Wild Thing” by Tone Loc!
For anyone unfamiliar, no that’s NOT the song that goes, “Wild Thing! You
make my heart sing!” No, in Tone Loc’s version, “wild thing” is an
act, not an individual, and the song sweetly includes the line, “I get paid to
do the…” I was horrified and mortified for them. I can
understand cheekily playing that song as you & your new husband leave the
reception… that would be a sense of humor. But walking down to the aisle
to your own wedding ceremony, holding your father’s arm, to a tune all about
raunchy sex? That is tackiness supreme! And the worst part is, the
whole marrying world is now reading about it!
I'd like to submit to you a wedding near-disaster story for
your website. My own wedding is in less than two weeks now and so far, so good
(knock on wood!) but I had to share what I did at my own brother's wedding. I
would like to say that I am hardly ever this ditzy but for some reason, I lost
my brain cells that day and this was the result.......
A year and a few months ago was my brother's wedding. I was a
bridesmaid There was one other girl who was a MOH. I was told my dress should be
a darker blue, and hers would be a light blue since she was the MOH. So I went
and got the dress and had the alterations made and got the shoes and wrap to
match.now, the wedding itself is at a location 4-plus hours away from my apt.
the day before the wedding I am to drive from my apt to my parent's house (hour
and a half away), pick up some of the relatives at my parent's house, then
follow my parents car to the hotel (3 hour drive). I pack up an overnight bag
and grab my dress bag that has the dress in it (or so I think!) Night before the
wedding, aunt asks to see my BM dress. I didn't want to unzip the dress out of
the bag so I just show her the fabric that peeks out from the underneath of the
Next morning I get up at 8 AM. Wedding is at 11 am. I go to
unzip the bag.... AND IT'S JUST THE WRAP. No dress!!!! I am horrified
beyond belief. I can't believe I did something so dunderheaded and now remember
the fact there were TWO dress bags... one had the wrap in it, one had the dress.
DOH! Dress is 4 plus hours away hanging on the back of my bathroom door in my
Cringing inside, I go to tell my mom and my aunt who both look
at me horrified. My brother (the groom) overhears and starts laughing. I
get someone to call his fiancé and tell her I'm running late but I'll be at the
wedding on time. I feel really bad because it's not like there was an abundance
of BMs at the wedding... just me and a MOH so it would look really obvious if I
had to cancel out at the last minute. Also there were various issues between her
in-laws and my folks, and this would have been the straw to break the camel's
back, so to speak. My mom fears that the bride will think we had planned this on
purpose and is horrified at my mistake. We run down to the front desk and
ask if there is a David's Bridal anywhere near the hotel (where we had
originally gotten the dress). No luck, but there IS a mall across the street
which is open at 9am. My mom and aunt and I pile in the car and my mom is
freaking out and driving erratically while we go to the mall. I am hoping a cop
does not pull us over because my mom is driving like a madwoman. We run into the
dept stores as soon as they open and start looking at ANY blue dresses in my
size. Nothing at the one store. Run to the other store, and find a sales rack of
prom dresses. I found one dress there that looks like it would work. It's
the EXACT color of the MOH's dress AND In my size AND was marked down from 100
dollars to 7 DOLLARS because of various sales discounts.!!!! Tried it on and it
fit almost perfectly (shoulder straps a little lose but hey!). RAN to the
car and drove like hell to the church. Ended up matching the other girl
perfectly and nobody knew that wasn't my original dress. The bride didn't
say anything to me which is probably just as well. ;)
I'm getting married in May to a wonderful man. He (and his
family) have their little quirks, but don't we all? This story is about his
mother, my FMIL. FMIL is a self-described socialite originally from South
Carolina. She is also a natural blonde, and well, now I see why blonde jokes are
The background: DF and his family are Caucasian. I'm Japanese.
This is NOT an issue (no tension, no "defiling the blood" type
feelings). My FSIL has two adorable kids - a boy and a girl, who I've asked to
be the ring bearer and flower girl. In fact, we had a family visit a while ago
(me, DF, his sister and her two kids were visiting their parents, my future ILs).
Bear in mind that they ran away screaming from my DF (their blood uncle) but
took to me like a duck takes to water. Their mom was amazed "she NEVER goes
to anyone!" Not a single mention that I look kind of different from
everyone else. And you know kids, if they were thinking it, they would have said
Fast forward a few weeks. I guess FMIL had been chatting with
FSIL and suggesting that they take the kids to more Asian restaurants "so
they'll get used to seeing Asian people and won't freak out at seeing so many
Asian people at the wedding." When FSIL told DF, he said he didn't know if
he should pass it along to me or not. He was mortified. I was more amused than
anything. The wedding is next month and I guess we'll see how the kids react at
being surrounded by so many Asians!
My now-husband and I had
been dating for about four years when we got engaged. My family loves
him, and his family had always been extremely warm and welcoming toward me.
Everyone knew we would be married eventually, so it wasn't much of a
shock to anyone when he proposed. Even so, I thought we would have
received a warmer reaction from my now mother in law. Instead of the
usual congratulatory remarks when we told her (both of us, together, in
person), she said, "Well, I hope you paid cash for the ring!"
My cousin "Kevin" was finally marrying his
girlfriend of many years, "Loretta." The wedding was
designed to be an intimate affair in the town where Loretta's parents lived,
which was a 2-day drive from where most of my side of the family was
located. After a lot of poking and prodding, his Aunt (my mother)
"Belinda" and my youngest brother agreed to make the drive to the
wedding. My fiancé and I were to meet them at the wedding, as we
lived in another state.
I had never met Loretta before (and had not seen my cousin in
years), but it was obvious as soon as I got there that Kevin was
positively glowing with love for Loretta and excitement over the
marriage. It was also obvious that Kevin and his mother (may Aunt)
"Candice" were positively thrilled that we had been able to make
it to the wedding. The ceremony was absolutely beautiful, and I can
only hope my fiancé and I look as happy and in love as Kevin and Loretta
did. You could not help but be thrilled for the both of them.
Belinda is not a person that is fond of weddings.
She has had several failed ones, and she has not openly embraced my upcoming
marriage (a story for another time). As the wedding reception wound
down, Kevin came to our table to catch up on old times. He and I are
the same age, and it was fun to trade stories about where life had taken us.
I was particularly happy to fill him in on how my professional career was
going, as I had not spoken to him since graduating law school and becoming
After trading small talk, Kevin asked how my practice was
going and whether I had made the decision to specialize in a particular
field of law. Immediately Belinda pipes up, saying, "He doesn't
specialize in divorces yet." I was mortified, but at least Kevin
took it in stride. I am only glad that Loretta was not around to hear
it and that we all quickly left the reception. With a year to go until
my wedding, I can only imagine what Belinda has up her sleeves for us.
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