When I was 3 years old I was to be the flower girl at my uncle's wedding. I remember being really enthusiastic about the fact I was getting a "princessy" dress and my hair done. My job was to walk to the altar before the bride and groom with my 5-year-old cousin, wait nicely during the ceremony and then toss petals in the wake of the bride and groom as they walked back down the aisle.

The walking to the altar went nicely, but the sermon was a bit too long for my cousin, who started to scratch some sticker or something off the bottoms of my uncle's shoes as the bride and groom kneeled at the altar. Then, as the ceremony ended and the bride and groom began to walk back, I was tossing the petals quite professionally until I realized about halfway down the aisle that the pretty pink petals would be left on the church floor. I then proceeded to begin picking the petals up from the floor instead and collect them back into my basket!

Fortunately no-one got angry at me for trying to save the petals, but I am still reminded about this incident and it's been 17 years!

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When my sister was married, she insisted that all three of my daughters would be in her wedding.  They were 5, 3 and 18 months at the time.  We knew there'd be mishaps and my sister was more than prepared to deal with whatever happened.  The wedding itself had a couple minor upsets - normal behavior for such small children.

At the reception, the cake table was surrounded by an assortment of cookies.  People began to comment to me on how sweet my middle daughter was to hand out cookies to guests.  I watched with pride while she visited different tables and presented her gifts.  Towards the end of the night, however, someone informed us that they had also been watching her.  Apparently she was getting a cut of the action as well by licking each cookie before she approached her beneficiary!!

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The wedding took place in November 1988.  I was 8 years old at the time.  My father was in the wedding party.  My parents knew the couple for a long time and the groom was like a big brother to me and my sister.  My sister, mother and I were sitting in the pew of the church when this incident took place.

  The bride (Mary) decided to have the groom’s 3 year old niece (Becky) as her flower girl.  Becky was supposed to walk down the aisle right before the bride.  Unfortunately, Becky decided at the last minute that she did not want to walk down the aisle by her self.  Instead of her mother (Laura - who was in the wedding party) taking her hand, poor Mary was forced to walk down the aisle holding Becky’s hand.  And instead of walking normally, Becky glued herself to Mary’s side and walked attached to Mary’s leg and sort of behind her at the same time.  Becky was also crying.  Since Mary’s other hand held her bouquet, Mary’s father could not hold his own daughter’s hand.  It was a very awkward walk down the aisle.  Mary is a very sweet woman and managed to smile and keep quiet about the whole thing.

My advice to parents of flower girls and ring bearers:  any child under the age of 4 is too young!  They throw tantrums and their moods change very quickly.  They may look sweet and cute in their wedding finery, but a sobbing child throwing a tantrum is not the way a bride and groom want to remember their wedding.  Parents are responsible for their children wherever they are – including weddings.

  Though it was a small part of the wedding and it happened 18 years ago, I managed to remember it, though I was a child at the time.

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When my husband and I got married, we had 3 small children as our flower girls and ring bearer.  They were all 3 years old.  And we knew that anything could happen, we weren’t worried about whether they made it down the aisle, we just wanted them to be a part of our day.  Both of the two flower girls were my cousins and the ring bearer, Austin is the son of my MOH. 

The kids all got down the aisle great.  The problem started after the ceremony began.  After the flower girls made their way to the alter, they went over to the pulpit and sat on the stairs, they were able to whisper to each other and watch everyone sitting in the pews.  Austin , somehow got stuck standing next to our pastor, holding his hand.  

As the pastor was in the middle of praying for us, I hear Austin whisper to his mother (the MOH) that he had to go potty.  Now of course he went literally seconds before we walked down the isle, but what are you going to do, he’s 3.   He keeps repeating himself in whispers, my husband and I are trying not to laugh out loud. So now the MOH is trying to get her husband's attention (he’s sitting in the pews).  And then Austin yells…I HAVE TO GO POTTY!!!   And everyone breaks out into laughter.  So his father gets him and takes him in back to go potty. 

But it gets better, he didn’t have to go…he didn’t want to stand with the pastor anymore, he wanted to go play with the flower girls.  But how can you be mad at that cute little face, who every time he heard the church bells chime after the wedding (his house is around the corner from the church) would say that’s the church where he married Aunt Meagan.   He’s 8 now, and we love to tease him about that day.

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Page Last Updated July 30, 2007