Etiquette Hell = Where the ill-mannered deserve to go


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They're armed, they're unprofessional and they're going to ruin your wedding day if you aren't careful.  (And stories of victimized vendors.)

Jan-Jun 2000 Archive


My fiancee and I were in the process of registering at one our local department store.   As we were walking around with the scanner we were approached by a saleslady in the crystal section who had some "excellent" suggestions for us.  She said she had noticed that a bride recently registered for eight matching ring trays and was confused until it occurred to her that she was registering for her bridesmaid's gifts.   She went on: "And I thought, what an excellent idea! That way, you're not out-of-pocket for all of those bridesmaids gifts!" Sheesh. As if it's not bad enough to have your friends have to fly across the country, buy a dress they'll never wear again, buy you a shower gift and then go buy you a wedding gift off your registry, only to receive that gift along with the other bridesmaids, who may have done the same thing? What a way to con someone into buying a gift, for herself, so you aren't out-of-pocket for all those expensive pesky gifts for your closest friends. My wedding is near my sister's birthday, maybe I should register for a birthday gift for her.... the possibilities are endless!  Evend0508-00

My sister is getting married. She has already chosen her wedding dress. She and my mother went to a local store to look at bridesmaids' dresses (mind you, NOT wedding gowns).

The salesperson assumed that they were looking at wedding dresses and told my sister and mother that my sister should come back for three fittings. The last of which should be no sooner than one week before the wedding. My mother was confused and thought that one week before the wedding was a little too close to the wedding date to assure that alterations were complete.  Now keep in mind that they went looking for bridesmaids' dresses not a gown for my sister.)

The salesperson responded quite matter-of-factly that they require the one week since of course my sister will be pregnant by then!

My mother was appalled! We are a VERY Catholic family and so is the groom, so I am sure that you understand how out of place the implication was. My mother responded to the effect that that would not be the case.

The salesperson patted her on the arm and told her not to kid herself. She said that more than 95% of her clients are pregnant before they are married. Then told her that as much as she would like to believe that my sister is not going to be pregnant that mothers just want to accept the facts, and again insisted that my sister will be pregnant before she says "I do".

My mother and sister walked out without another word, leaving the salsperson with a confused look on her face having no idea why they were leaving.  Evend0308-00

My bride and I spent a lot of time interviewing flower vendors and photographers for our wedding. We found this very nice woman with long blond hair who spent a lot of time with us going over her portfolio of wedding pictures. She even served tea and cookies. We were very impressed. On the day of the wedding here comes this women with a short, I would say butch, haircut dyed orange. It was the same women! It took me some time to recognize her. She was wearing black jeans and a tan shirt covered by a vest with all her equipment. To add to this little farce, she brought along a helper. A short Asian girl with long black hair who would not look up.  This helper was constantly answering the photographer with "no mistress" and "yes mistress." If it wasn't our wedding I would have been on the floor laughing.

We got the pictures and they were horrible. I don't know how it was done but the pictures were half black and white. Literally the top half of the picture would be in color and the bottom half in black-and-white. My wife was in tears. I finally found a place that could reprocess the pictures and blend in the color. I went to the photographer and asked for a few negatives. I picked the best five and had the process done to see how it would turn out. Luckily it work, we had some items from the wedding the lab could use to determine the proper colors, and we got some good pictures. I went back for the rest of the negatives but she told me she had thrown them out. This, despite the fact she knew I was working to fix the problem. Needless to say we did not pay the rest of the money.    evend0629-00

Eighteen years ago, my dear brother, aged 36, died very suddenly. It was a great shock to our family which consisted of my husband, my mother, and I. Being so young, my brother had not foreseen the need for life insurance.   My mother had little income, and my husband and I had just put all of our money into a new house. Nonetheless, we pooled our resources and planned the funeral.  The three of us visited the florist my mother had patronized for over 15 years.  We decided on a lovely spray to cover the casket and inquired about the price.  It was very expensive and we wanted to have about half of the red rose buds substituted with red carnations.  This would still maintain the beauty of the spray at a reasonable price.   Much to my shock and horror, one of the clerks began to chastise us, severely, about "being cheap". She said she had never heard of people substituting flowers in a funeral spray.  This went on for several, very long minutes.  I wanted to leave, but my mother could not handle going to another florist and starting the process over again.  So, I gritted my teeth, asked the clerk to please stop her commentary, and we made the arrangements.

To this day, it still irks me that anyone would be so tacky and thoughtless to a grieving family.  I guess her greed just got the best of her. What also shocked me, was that no one else working there saw a problem with this woman's tirade. Needless to say, our family found another florist for our future business. Evend0407-00

The professional DJ at our wedding dance played the song "Going Through the Big D (And Don't Mean Dallas)", a song about a guy getting divorced. I guess I should have given him a play list instead of leaving it up to his discretion.    Evend0328-00

It is about the lady who made the dresses for my wife's bridesmaids.  Well, it was a simple pattern (the pattern shown to me from my wife). Violet dress with a beautiful pattern across the chest, cut low in the back to about the midback or so.  Anyway, the dresses were plain o'dress.  No fancy bows, no ugly shawls, just a plain and simple yet beautiful gown.  Well, the dress maker kept asking my wife about adding a pink ribbion around the waist and one around the end of the dress (bottom). My wife told her repeatedly, " No".   Well to make a story short, at the wedding the dresses had pink ribbions and my wife was pissed. She never seen the dress because the bridesmaids went for fittings and we figured the correct dress was being made. The girls never questioned the dress since they figured it was a addition made at the last minute by my wife. 

To top it off the dress maker told my wife that she had no taste and she wanted to save her an embarassment with the dress. Well we sued the dress maker for the money for each dress. And to top it all of the dress maker didn't charge us for the ribbion, but at the court she stated to the prosacuter that she wanted to be paid 100 dollars for each dress for the ribbion and the hours to sew it onto each dress. Well, to make the ending better we won the lawsuit, and we had a great wedding. And to help us feel better, for our one year anniversary the bridesmaids burned the dresses in  a bon fire for us!  Evend0525-00