Etiquette Hell

A Civil World. Off-topic discussions on a variety of topics. Guests, register for forum membership to see all the boards. => Time For a Coffee Break! => Topic started by: jpcher on October 07, 2011, 02:01:12 PM

Title: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jpcher on October 07, 2011, 02:01:12 PM
Somebody brought a dish of meatballs in bbq sauce to my party as an appetizer last Saturday.

Last night I was foraging in my fridge for something to eat. "Oh. Meatballs. Hmmm, it's been 5 days. Are they still good?" I smelled them and tasted one. Smelled good, tasted good too. So I warmed up a few. They were yummy!

I woke up in the middle of the night. I'm not going into details, suffice it to say it wasn't fun.

My stomach is still bothering me. (I'm okay, not running a fever, just upset innards. Enough to keep me home from work today.)

Then it dawned on me that those meatballs had been sitting out for a looooong time during the party. Why-o-why did I even put them in the fridge? They should have been tossed while I was cleaning up! (Actually, the person that brought them wanted to take her dish home so she put the meatballs in a tupperware when she left and I just put them aside in my kitchen.)

Stupid brain-burp mistake and now I'm paying for it.




What about you? Any stories about brain-burp stupidity? Where you thought doing something would be okay but turned out to be not so okay? (Doesn't have to be food related.)

Please let me know that I'm not alone in this world. ;D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: TheDisappeared on October 07, 2011, 02:28:54 PM
I made wonderfully delicious homemade marshmallows.  Too bad I forgot to grease and dust the pan first. 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Betelnut on October 07, 2011, 02:35:32 PM
I made chocolate chip cheesecake one time and started taking off the springform pan before the cake had completely cooled--as a matter of fact, it was still pretty warm.  The cheesecake just started oozing out and down.  Luckily, I was able to slam the sides of the pan back onto the cake.  It wasn't pretty anymore but still tasted good!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: amylouky on October 07, 2011, 02:47:09 PM
I bought two beautiful shell rings on a trip to the beach many years ago. I took them off once and set them on the bathroom counter.. when I came back one was missing, and I couldn't find it anywhere. So, thinking maybe it had fallen on the floor and bounced somewhere, I decided to knock the OTHER one off, to see which way it would bounce.

Yeah. It shattered. Shells don't bounce so well.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: SisJackson on October 07, 2011, 04:10:56 PM
I'm an occasional victim of the "ohnosecond" - that infinitesimal slice of time where you realize you've done something dumb but it's too late to stop yourself.

Most recently I was hauling a huge armload of stuff out to my car and as I struggled to click the unlock button on my keyfob, open the door with one finger, and ease the pile onto the seat, my keys fell to the floor of the car. Then my elbow bumped the lock button on the door, locking all the doors of the car.  As I shoved the door shut, I had the "ohnosecond" and tried to grab it before it slammed home, but it was no use.  My car doors were all locked, my handbag (and phone) inside, and my spare key was locked inside my house.  To make matters worse, my external garage door opener's battery was dead.

I knocked on the doors of all the neighbors I know, but none were home, as it was in the middle of the day on a weekday.  Thankfully a woman soon appeared with her dog and I was going to ask her to call a pop-a-lock place for me, but she instead let me come to her home around the corner where she loaned me a 9V battery which allowed me back into the house.  I got my keys and returned the neighbor's battery (and I have since replaced the one in the external door opener) but I was about fifteen minutes late for my engagement.  That'll teach me.  I should have picked up the keys as soon as I had put everything else down.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: bansidhe on October 07, 2011, 06:40:15 PM
My shower head was getting all clogged up with hard water deposits, sending sprays of water in odd directions. It's not the type of shower head you can just unscrew: removing it would require some serious effort. I puzzled for a bit about how to solve this problem, when it suddenly occurred to me to fill a plastic sandwich bag with vinegar and tape it around the shower head to keep it in place. So that's what I did, figuring that leaving it in place for 24 hours ought to do the trick.

Fast-forward 24 hours. I've just finished a workout and hopped into the shower. By this time, I've completely forgotten about the baggie of vinegar. I turned on the water and pulled the knob to start the shower and...nothing. Annoyed, I made sure the knob was pulled out all the way. Still nothing. I cranked the water up higher - nothing. Cursing, I looked up at the shower head to see what the blankety-blank was wrong, just in time for the baggie to give way to the water pressure and explode in my face.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Aggiesque on October 07, 2011, 06:52:39 PM
I made meatballs the other night!

The garlic glurged on me. I thought it'd be ok. They were so garlicy it burnt your mouth >.<
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Kimblee on October 07, 2011, 07:01:22 PM
My shower head was getting all clogged up with hard water deposits, sending sprays of water in odd directions. It's not the type of shower head you can just unscrew: removing it would require some serious effort. I puzzled for a bit about how to solve this problem, when it suddenly occurred to me to fill a plastic sandwich bag with vinegar and tape it around the shower head to keep it in place. So that's what I did, figuring that leaving it in place for 24 hours ought to do the trick.

Fast-forward 24 hours. I've just finished a workout and hopped into the shower. By this time, I've completely forgotten about the baggie of vinegar. I turned on the water and pulled the knob to start the shower and...nothing. Annoyed, I made sure the knob was pulled out all the way. Still nothing. I cranked the water up higher - nothing. Cursing, I looked up at the shower head to see what the blankety-blank was wrong, just in time for the baggie to give way to the water pressure and explode in my face.

Oh geeze I needed this laugh, thanks so much.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Thipu1 on October 07, 2011, 07:03:28 PM
We had this kind of minor distress only last week.

There was a restaurant we used to frequent when we were dating.  It was named El Coyote.  The food was delicious but, after dinner there we just couldn't sleep.  We called the problem the 'El Coyote Syndrome'. 

Last week I made a taco pie for Dinner because we had some left over sweet corn that we didn't want to waste.  Like the food at El Coyote, the meal was delicious.  Like the food at El Coyote, we were both awake all night. 

We didn't feel ill.  We didn't have to make trips to the loo.  We just couldn't sleep.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Ferrets on October 07, 2011, 07:07:54 PM
I'm an occasional victim of the "ohnosecond" - that infinitesimal slice of time where you realize you've done something dumb but it's too late to stop yourself.

Do you ever stand there futilely shouting "Control-Z! Control-Z!"?

(I do. ::) )
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: POF on October 07, 2011, 07:12:13 PM
I have a delicious chicken taco soup recipe, its easy, yummy and calorie firendly. It calls for 2 tsp of chili powder.  iread it as 2 TBSP. Which would have been OK - I like spice.... but I used one TBSP of chipotle chili powder and 1 TBSP of mexican hot chili powder.
I LOVE spicy this was BRUTAL.

DS12 likes it though.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: robobecky on October 07, 2011, 07:17:44 PM
Just did one.  Was toasting my last bagel and forgot to keep an eye on it.  I had the toaster set on light, but my idea of light and the toaster's idea of light are 2 different things.  Yup, burnt bagel.  And the reason I forgot?  I was reading this thread. ::)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: siamesecat2965 on October 07, 2011, 07:42:13 PM
My shower head was getting all clogged up with hard water deposits, sending sprays of water in odd directions. It's not the type of shower head you can just unscrew: removing it would require some serious effort. I puzzled for a bit about how to solve this problem, when it suddenly occurred to me to fill a plastic sandwich bag with vinegar and tape it around the shower head to keep it in place. So that's what I did, figuring that leaving it in place for 24 hours ought to do the trick.

Fast-forward 24 hours. I've just finished a workout and hopped into the shower. By this time, I've completely forgotten about the baggie of vinegar. I turned on the water and pulled the knob to start the shower and...nothing. Annoyed, I made sure the knob was pulled out all the way. Still nothing. I cranked the water up higher - nothing. Cursing, I looked up at the shower head to see what the blankety-blank was wrong, just in time for the baggie to give way to the water pressure and explode in my face.

I must admit I giggled too, but because this is something I SO would do.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: lipli on October 07, 2011, 09:08:48 PM
I have two. 

My sink stopper came unhooked so it was difficult to get a seal.  I read online how to rehook it.  Step one was to unscrew the "finger" that goes through the ring at the bottom of the stopper which pulls/pushes it.  I do it and realize that there are bubbles in the sink from washing my hands.  I rinse them down so I can see the ring.  Yep, watered my sink cabinet. 

I have this amazing spinach casserole dish that requires onion soup mix (this is a multipart fail).  I realized too late that I didn't have the onion mix.  I look up on line how to make it.  I didn't have any of the onion ingredients but I had their garlic counterparts.  I love garlic so I thought this would be full of win.  Nope.  I can't even describe how bad it was.  A waste of delicious spinach.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: RegionMom on October 07, 2011, 09:30:26 PM
There is a great Mexican place in a town in New Mexico that we visit every couple of years when travelling.  They have a shrimp dish that melts in your mouth.  I took leftovers to our hotel.  two days later, I pulled them out of the fridge and made a hodge podge of several dished of leftovers for a family night in meal. 
oh, the shrimp was good!  I sorta knew I should not have eaten it, cuz I could tell it was not quite up to par anymore, and I paid for it all night long.  Fortunately, I had a collection of good vacation reads to keep me company on the bathroom floor! 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: siamesecat2965 on October 07, 2011, 09:58:35 PM
Not me, but my friend.  She had come back from the grocery store, and had put some of her bags on the floor in the back seat of her car.  Which got stuck, so she pulled as hard as she could to get them out, they gave way all of a sudden, and she smacked herself square in the nose, and broke it.  I still tease her about this today :) 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Mikayla on October 07, 2011, 10:01:10 PM
At my first "dress up" dinner party, I was making this yummy spinach-cucumber soup.  Just before the guests arrived, I put it all in the blender and ran it on high.  My only mistake was forgetting to put the lid on.  The kitchen looked like a crime scene.

My other one was showing off to a neighbor kid when I was 10 and telling him I could do better wheelies on his bike than he could.  I was right about the wheelies, but the price I paid for my competitiveness was a spiral fracture of my tibia that had me in various casts for 6 months.

And I had to pay an ER visit once because I super glued my eye shut.  I was trying to do fake fingernails and didn't read the instructions.  To this day, I don't know how it happened. 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: megswsu on October 07, 2011, 10:34:35 PM
Hmmmm.......you must be referring to my husband's birthday this last August. He wanted pizza for his birthday so I made some pizza dough and put it to rise in the oven like I always do. See where this is going? Yep, I preheat the oven to cook the pizza dough and right about when the oven hit 425 I realized the rising dough was still in the oven.  :o Sadly, there was no saving the dough, and I had to scrub the ehell out of the friggin bowl to get it clean. (as an added bonus, the bread sticks I made were god awful). My poor husband wound up w/Papa John's for his birthday pizza dinner.

The silver lining was that I had thankfully made the Boston Cream Pie the night before so at least I didn't ruin that!  :D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: MrsVandy on October 07, 2011, 11:06:19 PM
Not food related but very stupid. I was playing mini golf in an indoor glow in the dark putting place. We were all being very silly and then I hit my ball way too hard. It ricocheted  off of a bunch of things. Then it came back and hit me right in the nose! I was so happy it didn't hit any one else to even think about how bad it hurt.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: furrcats on October 07, 2011, 11:22:08 PM
Blow up my iPad and iPhone at the same time  :P don't put drinks or food in backpacks  ::) :P
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Kaora on October 07, 2011, 11:26:10 PM
Separately, I've washed my iPod (iPod 4th gen), dropped a cellphone in a full gutter (it lived), dropped cellphone in washing machine (it didn't), washed an High Ace Card for my Middle School.  That last one I still kick myself to this day >.< In my middle school, you could get Ace Cards and High Ace Cards for per-semester use.  It allowed you to leave class for lunch/ end of day early, and cut the lunchline to be first.  You got them for hard work and great grades.  Did I mention that High Ace was the harder of the two to get, and was INFINITE use?  Yeah >_<;; It was made of cardboard.  At least I got more Ace cards, just never a High Ace again.  :-\

I also have a habit of miscoordinating steps to complete a task XD Or, I'm a klutz.  I will just try to form the steps in my head, and then I accidentally let go of an object waaay before I'm supposed to.  I have dropped my purse, a bowl of cereal, a cat (cat lived :P ), and pens this way. :P
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Otterpop on October 08, 2011, 12:11:53 AM
Food related:  Came home from the market, put groceries away and couldn't find the London broil.  Figured I must have left it at the store.  Oh well, I have the receipt and will call and get a replacement when I have the time.  Three sweltering August days later there's a god-awful smell coming from my trunk.  The steak had crawled out of its bag, slipped into a dark corner and festered, ruining the carpet and everything.

Non food related:  I dropped my iPhone into a toilet.  As it was dropping, time stopped, I grasped the air in slow motion and followed that phone into the water (just used).  It didn't survive and I had to autoclave my arm up to the elbow.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: mbbored on October 08, 2011, 12:47:15 AM
Just did one.  Was toasting my last bagel and forgot to keep an eye on it.  I had the toaster set on light, but my idea of light and the toaster's idea of light are 2 different things.  Yup, burnt bagel.  And the reason I forgot?  I was reading this thread. ::)

Love!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Redsoil on October 08, 2011, 01:01:29 AM
Some years ago, when I was newly married, I tried the whole cooking thing.  To the extent of making jam. 

Now, being a Thoroughly Modern Milly, I decided to do my jam-making via microwave,  I even had a special microwave recipe book that had a section on such things!

Hulled the strawberries, washed them, chopped them, added sugar and stuff and whacked them in to nuke.  Problem was, I neglected to turn the microwave power down to 70 percent (or whatever it was supposed to be).  Being ever efficient, I got on with a few other chores.  Came back to a massive red explosion in the microwave, and burned jam sizzling down the front of the cupboards, gently "phhhttting" and stinking the whole place out.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Kitty Hawk on October 08, 2011, 06:41:47 AM
A number of year ago, I didn't know if a burner on the electric stove was not or not.  So I put my hand on it.

Yes, it was hot.....
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Morty'sCleaningLady on October 08, 2011, 09:28:12 AM
On Wednesday, I took the dog for a walk at lunch time.  I put her in her harness, clicked on the leash, check my jacket pockets for baggies and then, switched jackets.  My housekeys remained in my other jacket.  My door lock clicked as I pulled the door shut!  Drats!

Well, my neighbor Janice has a key.  She was at work and I don't have that number.  I run into another neighbor.  Charlie first asks if I'll reimburse him for the long distance call (of course I will!) and I call my Dad; Charlie doesn't have a computer, so I can't email Janice or my realtor.  Dad lives 80 miles away.  That's 90 minutes by car.  I walk the dog and a neighbor lets me into the lobby.  Dad lets me in.  He's the best!  I've debated stopping locking my unit door, but I don't trust the kids across the hall.  I think they'd come in, start watching tv, drink all my lemonade and use my computer.  (All things they've asked to do in the past.) 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Thipu1 on October 08, 2011, 10:06:08 AM
A while back, I was at work and Mr. Thipu was home making barley soup.  He was used to making pea soup and he's a good cook in general so, things seemed under control.

They weren't.

When making pea soup, you use the whole pound bag of dried peas.  Not being used to barley, he did the same thing when the recipe called for only half a cup.  Have you ever seen a  big soup pot completely filled with barley?  It's an awesome sight.

The soup did turn out well but, for a week, we were eating boiled barley with every meal.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Thipu1 on October 08, 2011, 10:28:56 AM
This is a family story that comes from the 1920s.  In the USA, that was Prohibition.

To beat the ban, Grandpa made his own beer.  These days, home brewing is both legal and scientific.  Back then, it was neither. 

The final fermentation was achieved by putting a few raisins in each bottle before it was capped.  In the family home, the bottles were then put out in the back lobby to finish brewing. 

On one batch, things went horribly wrong.  The raisins were potent and the bottles started exploding.  Because the back lobby also served as a larder for the family food supply, something had to be done.

A younger son was given the task.  He was 'armored' with a saucepan on his head, a pillow strapped to his chest, heavy gloves, and towels wrapped around his arms.  His job was to open the lobby door and throw the bottles into the back yard. 

Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Solanna Dryden on October 08, 2011, 10:41:14 AM
A few weeks ago on a Monday night, I was trying to cook fish sticks at my apartment in Kingston (my university town. So, not at home.) I had never used the oven before, not even last year (always just used the burners) so I wasn't prepared for how small the interior was - the cookie sheet barely even fit in there, and in fact it got stuck a bit and I had to wiggle it to get it in.

That wasn't the mistake. The mistake was that I didn't notice the potholder AND the oven mitts that were...um...hanging right next to the stove, so I tried to use dishtowels to shield my hands. It worked the first time, and when I was getting them out to turn them.

When I went to put them back in, however, it was a different story. I wrapped the dishtowels around my hands and tried to put the cookie sheet back in.

It got stuck.

I couldn't get it in or out. I wiggled it and yanked in vain, but it was completely stuck. I wiggled again, and the sheet TIPPED. The fish fell out and fell on the rack and the element, and the dishtowel came unraveled from my hand and hit the element and caught fire. :o I yelled a bevy of swear words and shook the towel. Luckily the flames went right out! Unfortunately, in the midst of doing this, my hand it the rack, leaving a nice burn on my finger, which oddly enough didn't even hurt at the time.

Now the flames were gone, but there were still fish sticks all over the bottom of the oven, around the element. For obvious reasons, I was a little scared to stick my hand in there around a piece of metal that had previously been heated to 425 degrees! So I left the oven door open for awhile to let it cool, then carefully extracted them with a fork.

The fish was delicious, if not a little charred. And to this day, my housemates have never asked me why there is a charred hole in the bottom of one of the dishtowels.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: nutraxfornerves on October 08, 2011, 10:51:01 AM
Quote
A younger son was given the task.  He was 'armored' with a saucepan on his head, a pillow strapped to his chest, heavy gloves, and towels wrapped around his arms.  His job was to open the lobby door and throw the bottles into the back yard. 
Did he look like this?

(http://www.gallery.oldbookart.com/main.php?g2_view=core.DownloadItem&g2_itemId=28959&g2_serialNumber=2)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Amara on October 08, 2011, 11:04:26 AM
These are funny. Mine, however, is just embarrassing. (Okay, it might be funny to others.)

One night about 11:30 pm, I heard something outside. I don't normally go out by myself after dark, and especially not this late, but I needed to. (I can't remember the reason now, but it may have had to do with the extremely heavy wind, which I do NOT like, and getting things put where they wouldn't blow away.) So I am on the patio doing [whatever] when simultaneously two things happen: (1) I realize I left my keys in the house just as (2) the wind slams the door shut.

So there I am outside at 11:30 pm, the wind is howling up a storm, I am dressed in nothing but a short nightshirt, and the door is disturbingly un-openable. In fact, it is firmly shut and stuck. Even though it's not locked, I can't budge it. Believe me, I tried. Repeatedly.

I have no cell phone--and who would be up at 11:30 at night anyway?--and I can't go to the hotel down the street (un)dressed like this. I can't do anything except tug and pull at the door with increasing numbers of tears, and mounting fears and frustration.

In desperation I look around. There is the bathroom window. Of course it's not especially large. But maybe I can get in that if I really try. I know it's not yet locked so I tug it open. I figure maybe, just maybe, I can crawl through that. So I go around the dark property nervously, pull up several items I find there until I discover a plastic patio chair that will hoist me far enough off the ground to begin my wiggle. Which I do. Until I am about halfway in. It's then I realize that if I keep going I will plunge headfirst and uncontrollably onto a table that will collapse with me to the floor where I will likely break at least one thing (including maybe my neck on the sink) or I can re-try from the other end but that means I could just as easily crash head first onto the patio deck while trying to get my legs in the window. We are talking serious personal damage here either way.

I give up this idea and consider sleeping in the car. But I really don't feel safe out there, and the house isn't locked up and the bathroom window is open even though the kitchen door is slammed firmly shut. I try to stifle my increasing panic, which leads me to need to go to the bathroom desperately. And even if I sleep in the car, what the hell am I going to do in the morning? I can't wander the neighborhood near naked. Not. A. Good. Situation.

By this time the tears and self-directed rage are going full force along with the wind. I decide to try the door again, breaking it if I have to. And by god, this time it works! I have thrown my full body against it with such force that it opens! I go in to that wonderful light and warmth and safety, absolutely sobbing with relief. I hit the bathroom--but not until after firmly locking the door. I think it took me hours to get to sleep so pent up was I.

(I wish I could say that was the first time I locked myself out the house but, alas, it was not. At least the other time was during the day and I had a pair of still-wet leggings drying on the patio I could put on under the (same) night shirt while I got a ladder, took the screen off the kitchen window, used a very long-handled fruit picker to grab the jailer-sized key ring off the inside door handle and, with only one heart-stopping drop, bring them to me.)

I am a real danger to myself.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Kimblee on October 08, 2011, 11:17:31 AM
Non food related:  I dropped my iPhone into a toilet.  As it was dropping, time stopped, I grasped the air in slow motion and followed that phone into the water (just used).  It didn't survive and I had to autoclave my arm up to the elbow.

Oh man! That sucks.

I have a talent for catching electronics I've dropped just before some horrible fate befells them. Occasionally this includes other people's fumbles. I once caught my mom's cell as it dropped toward the crocodile water at the zoo... through the railings. Not as impressive as it sounds though, since my hand was already through the rails to drop food. I dropped the food, Mom gasped when her phone dropped, I snatched the phone then held it for a minute going "Wow... wish that was on film..." Its rarely a concious thing, i just happen to either be in the right place at the right time, or incredably lucky with my grabs.

So far its never failed, at least for me dropping things. I once made a swipe at my brothger's thrown phone and missed. (He tripped over a goat and fell, throwing his phone.) Of course now that I have shared my secret talent I'm gonna drop something and not catch it, aren't I?

ON-Topic: Last night I ate spagetti that had been in the fridge several days straight, thinking it'd be fine. Half-way through it i found a dead moth so I threw the rest out. This morning I am VERY sick and i doubt its the late moth's fault. And my cousin's wedding is at 3.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Otterpop on October 08, 2011, 10:43:12 PM
Ha, ha Kimblee.  Where were you when I needed you?!

  Hope you're feeling better.  A few tums, bicarbonate of soda and you should survive the wedding.  Oh, it's already over isn't it...Well, backwards good vibes.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Diane AKA Traska on October 08, 2011, 11:16:04 PM
I eat borderline food all the time.  It's kind of a talent... toughening up my stomach in case of emergency... you're not always going to be near a well-stocked fully-powered fridge.  But it has come back to bite me a few times.

Most notably, I was a teenager.  As a teenager, I had an appetite (lunch was more of a ritual than a meal... I'd eat enough to last me all day sometimes.)  We had the fixings for ham and cheese, and I love a good ham and cheese sandwich.  I also hadn't had breakfast, so I had three (3) sandwiches.  In my defense, I was hungry.  Believe it or not, we've not reached the stupid part.

See, what I hadn't really paid attention to at the time was that the ham had a strange multicolored sheen to it.  I thought this a trick of the light and oh isn't that kind of pretty and okay I'm really hungry now.  So I scarf down sandwich number one.  I scarf down sandwich number two.  I eat sandwich number three a little more leisurely, and my hunger is sated, and I am once again pleased with the world.

For a half hour.

Thirty minutes later, my stomach is pleading with me to pay attention.  Something is terribly, desperately wrong here.  I run downstairs (run may not be the right word for this... it was half-sprinting, half-stumbling) until I reach the back door.  I fling it open, take two steps, and promptly paint the back stairs a lovely shade of pink and white.  I have never, ever, vomited with that kind of force before or since.  I'd like to believe that were I mugged, I could successfully chase my attacker away with whatever were in my stomach that day, but alas.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Betelnut on October 09, 2011, 07:40:57 AM
 A couple of weeks ago, I take out my lawn mower to finally mow the lawn.  After weeks of rain (hello Irene and Lee!), my lawn is disturbingly tall and needs attention.  I confidently try to start the lawn mower.  Nada--no spark, not working.  I try again and again.  It is a new mower!  It can't be already not working!  I don't want to pay for someone to fix it!  It is charged!  I almost feel like crying.

It wasn't until the next morning when I was driving to work that I realized something.  Duh!  It is an electric lawn mower.  I really do need to use the key to start it!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: The703 on October 09, 2011, 08:19:40 AM
We had this kind of minor distress only last week.

There was a restaurant we used to frequent when we were dating.  It was named El Coyote.  The food was delicious but, after dinner there we just couldn't sleep.  We called the problem the 'El Coyote Syndrome'. 

Last week I made a taco pie for Dinner because we had some left over sweet corn that we didn't want to waste.  Like the food at El Coyote, the meal was delicious.  Like the food at El Coyote, we were both awake all night. 

We didn't feel ill.  We didn't have to make trips to the loo.  We just couldn't sleep.

Is the restaurant mexican themed? My FIL recently said that after he eats mexican he can't sleep. He thinks it's due to the salt content in the food. He's in his 60's now.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: m2kbug on October 09, 2011, 08:57:52 AM
My shower head was getting all clogged up with hard water deposits, sending sprays of water in odd directions. It's not the type of shower head you can just unscrew: removing it would require some serious effort. I puzzled for a bit about how to solve this problem, when it suddenly occurred to me to fill a plastic sandwich bag with vinegar and tape it around the shower head to keep it in place. So that's what I did, figuring that leaving it in place for 24 hours ought to do the trick.


I'm in tears laughing at this one!   ;D  And thanks for the baggie idea.  Such a simple solution that never occurred to me!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: turtleIScream on October 09, 2011, 10:25:43 AM
It was a somewhat chilly day, so I decided to fix myself a mug of hot cocoa.  I had the perfect blend of chocolate, milk, and vanilla, and went to grab some cinnamon.  Yeah, that jar of brownish red spice in my cabinet was NOT cinnamon; it was seasoned salt!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Julia Mercer on October 09, 2011, 10:44:48 AM
It was a somewhat chilly day, so I decided to fix myself a mug of hot cocoa.  I had the perfect blend of chocolate, milk, and vanilla, and went to grab some cinnamon.  Yeah, that jar of brownish red spice in my cabinet was NOT cinnamon; it was seasoned salt!

DOI!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Thipu1 on October 09, 2011, 11:06:24 AM
Quote
A younger son was given the task.  He was 'armored' with a saucepan on his head, a pillow strapped to his chest, heavy gloves, and towels wrapped around his arms.  His job was to open the lobby door and throw the bottles into the back yard. 
Did he look like this?

(http://www.gallery.oldbookart.com/main.php?g2_view=core.DownloadItem&g2_itemId=28959&g2_serialNumber=2)

Actually according to the family story, he did resemble that illustration, even though no one in the family had seen that image at the time.  When, as a small child, I was given a copy of 'Through the Looking Glass'. My mother looked at the picture and said, 'Yes.  That looks like X throwing out the beer bottles.'

When he grew up, that little boy Became a Minister.  It was always speculated that his childhood experience put the 'Fear of Dog' into him. 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Apricot on October 09, 2011, 11:31:15 AM
I've never had food poisoning, even though I sometimes eat questionable foods. My boyfriend has gotten food poisoning from things I've eaten with no problem.

Once, though, I went to set a brand new costco-size jar of sauce down on the counter and completely missed. Like, I let go when it wasn't over the counter at all. It was everywhere--even inside my shoes.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Diane AKA Traska on October 09, 2011, 11:47:10 AM
I've never had food poisoning, even though I sometimes eat questionable foods. My boyfriend has gotten food poisoning from things I've eaten with no problem.

Yes!  This is what I mean about toughening up your stomach!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: QueenofAllThings on October 09, 2011, 12:12:12 PM
Aside from trying to catch a falling iron, you mean?

Or trying to put out several flaming votives with a garden hose? (water + flaming wax = bad idea)

But my personal favorite - not my duh! moment but my eldest son's: he's at a mall, and sees a clothes steamer at Brookstone. They are demo-ing it, and he'd like to see how it works. So he aims it at his t-shirt (which is ON him at the time) and gives himself massive steam burns across his stomach ....  ::)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Fleur-de-Lis on October 09, 2011, 12:31:04 PM
It was a somewhat chilly day, so I decided to fix myself a mug of hot cocoa.  I had the perfect blend of chocolate, milk, and vanilla, and went to grab some cinnamon.  Yeah, that jar of brownish red spice in my cabinet was NOT cinnamon; it was seasoned salt!

Oh, :hugs:  I live in fear of doing something similar to myself - cinnamon, cumin, potato, potahto, right? 

Today's not so brilliant move was to leave margarine out overnight to soften.  Still in the wrapper.  In the microwave, so the cats couldn't get to it, but just on the microwave plate, not on a separate plate or bowl. 

It could have been worse.  I could have put the milk in the microwave for my cafe au lait without removing the margarine.  As it is, I just put the wrapped margarine back into the refrigerator (I won't be making cookies until later anyway) and I will try again later. 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jpcher on October 09, 2011, 12:42:11 PM
Aside from trying to catch a falling iron, you mean?

Or trying to put out several flaming votives with a garden hose? (water + flaming wax = bad idea)

But my personal favorite - not my duh! moment but my eldest son's: he's at a mall, and sees a clothes steamer at Brookstone. They are demo-ing it, and he'd like to see how it works. So he aims it at his t-shirt (which is ON him at the time) and gives himself massive steam burns across his stomach ....  ::)

For the win! You can't really blame the kid because it seemed like a good idea at the time. After all, his mother tried to catch an iron! ;D

Please don't take offense, QueenofAllThings . . . I'm not laughing at you . . .

It's the "DOH!" moments that I really have to laugh at myself about. Thanks for posting, everyone. At least I know that I'm not alone in this world! ;D



P.S. Queen -- I hope your son was okay and where on earth were those demo people when he tried to do this? ::)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: QueenofAllThings on October 09, 2011, 03:25:21 PM
Oh, he was fine - too busy laughing at himself to be in much pain. And I'm not offended (occasionally I try to catch knives too - why do I only drop them when cooking barefoot?). You have to be able to laugh at yourself!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: White Dragon on October 09, 2011, 03:43:39 PM
I work for MegaCorp. Not sure if this is stupid stuff or Professional Darwinism, but I'm still kicking myself - hard!

MegaCorp has a website that contains all the marketing information for each branch office. Quantities, day of service, method of delivery etc.
Clients access this website and use the information to plan their purchases and buying campaigns.
It's a really, really, really big deal. Clients include major retailers, agencies etc.
Huge deal.

Branch offices are responsible for making sure the website info is correct. In our office, this is my job and I maintain the data for several offices. Thankfully, there haven't been any major changes lately because I've been busier than a chihuahua on a triple espresso.

I got a phone call from a client. They had some questions about one of the branch's data. I had a massive, massive, fundemantal brain spasm and gave them the information for the wrong office. I did not realize this until the next day, because...

Cue an email next day from UberHighLevelNationalMarketing Client. It said, essentially

"Thanks for letting us know that the information on MegaCorp's website on BranchBlue was incorrect. Please send the correct information to janedoe@megacorp and she'll handle your update. We have a meeting with MegaCorp next week and we're going to use this set of data as an example of why we don't like to use the website, it's always wrong.  :o  :o  :o

Sweet petunia monkey fritters!

I then wrote the most apologetic, humble, fall-on-my-sword-shoot-me-I'm-stupid email I have in my entire life.
I gave them the correct data. Told them the website was essentially correct, aside from a few tweaks (data attached).

Now I have to wait until Tuesday to see if I've staved off disaster.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: bansidhe on October 09, 2011, 04:27:38 PM
My shower head was getting all clogged up with hard water deposits, sending sprays of water in odd directions. It's not the type of shower head you can just unscrew: removing it would require some serious effort. I puzzled for a bit about how to solve this problem, when it suddenly occurred to me to fill a plastic sandwich bag with vinegar and tape it around the shower head to keep it in place. So that's what I did, figuring that leaving it in place for 24 hours ought to do the trick.


I'm in tears laughing at this one!   ;D  And thanks for the baggie idea.  Such a simple solution that never occurred to me!

It worked really well, too - apart from the whole "completely forgetting it was there" part.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: amanda_tlg on October 09, 2011, 04:54:07 PM
Ooh, ooh, I can play this game!

I am the lawn-care-expert in our house. DH hasn't mown or used the weedeater in about 3 years. I inherited my weedeater/weedwhacker from my father, because it was too old, too heavy and too hard to start. Remember that....too hard for a grown man to start. I developed some tricks and can usually get it started. However, one of the tricks involves me calling the weedeater and it's mother both an extraordinary amount of, um, unsanitary names and insulting its heritage, social class, everything. Believe it or not, the weedeater will.not.start until I have done this. I usually wear my earbuds with the music up LOUD while I cut, but I always pull them out when starting the mower or weedeater. Well one day apparently I had forgotten, and did my normal cursing-swearing-insulting at the weedeater with the music still blasting in my ears and so was talking WAY WAY louder than I ever meant to. Look up. Yeah. Neighbor, his wife and his brother in law are on their deck (which overlooks our yard) and wearing identical looks of amused amazement that not only did I KNOW those words, but was using them at the volume I had been. Thankfully they were not offended or insulted, and double thankfully it happened during school hours and no impressionable school age children had to be subjected to that.

For my "ohnosecond" moment. I was taking DS5 to school because we were already late and had missed the bus. Got in the car, realized I forgot my keys. Went to shut the door and at the last second I saw my keys on the floor and didn't need to go in the house after all. Tried to grab door. Instead I shut my thumb and first two fingers in the door. And I don't mean the door just hit really hard and bounced off. The door actually LATCHED with a good portion of my right hand stuck inside. Managed to not scream and scare the daylights outta DS5. Barely. End result: Dislocated my thumb and index finger at the knuckles, chipped a bone on my middle finger and lost the nails on all three. This happened last spring and they are just now back to full length.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: GreenEyedHawk on October 09, 2011, 05:43:52 PM
Ok, my first story is pretty gross.

Back when I was still working in a particular grooming shop, I used to go to the Tim Hortons in the same strip mall for lunch frequently.  I'd get a sandwich and come back to work.  The shop owner's daughter had an Amazon parrot she used to bring to the shop sometimes.  He'd walk along the divider between the professional side and DIY side, high enough that most of the dogs in the shop never even noticed he was there.  One day I went to grab my sandwich and noticed a smear on the wrapper.  Thinking it was just excess sauce from my sandwich, I scooped it up with my finger and licked it off.  About a split second later, I realised it was bird poo.  Needless to say, I rather lost my appetite after that.

My "ohnosecond" was when I was actually WORKING at Tim Hortons when I was about 17 or so.  The bagels came pre-cooked but frozen, loose in boxes which we kept in the walk-in freezer.  When I was on sandwich counter, it was part of my job to make sure warm bagels stayed stocked so I'd have to go into the freezer, get whatever kind of bagels we were low on, and put them in the oven to reheat.  The freezer shelves had just enough space between them to store the boxes, but not open the tops, a problem we solved by just cutting a v-shaped hole in the box fronts so we could just reach in and grab what we needed.  I was doing just this, cutting a V in the front of a box with a box cutter, the knife in my right hand and using my left hand to keep the box from sliding off the shelf.  The knife was sort of dull-ish, you see, and was not a typical box cutter but more like a lino cutter, hooked like a cat's claw.  It kept getting stuck and it was REALLY effin cold in the freezer and I was rapidly losing my patience with the dang knife. It would get stuck, I would yank it out, work it back in and keep cutting, getting closer and closer to my left hand, still bracing the box.  One yank of the knife too many; I knew this time as soon as I yanked on the knife that I was going to cut myself, but it was too late to stop.  Sure enough, I opened a gash on the inside of my left wrist, wide enough that I got a shockingly good look at the tendons in my wrist.

I immediately dropped the knife, covered the wound with my free hand and ran out of the freezer to find my supervisor.  She had our delivery guy run me to the doctor for stitches (8 in total) but in the meantime, of course my co-workers were wondering why I'd suddenly vanished and asked the supervisor, who added insult to injury by telling everyone, "GEH slit her wrist in the freezer!" prompting a wildfire of rumours that I had tried to commit suicide in the walk-in freezer.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Apricot on October 09, 2011, 06:07:00 PM
GreenEyedHawk, you reminded me: I was at the park with my sister, her friend, my boyfriend, and our dogs. I had Elsie, my dog, on a retractable line, and sat down in the middle of a field. Elsie wanted to keep racing around, so I sat down on the box part of the lead. Well, the line wrapped around my ankle and went ZIP! My sister knew I was really hurt because I didn't yell--I said "No, nononono--" softly as I tried to jump away from my leg. I ended up with a rope burn that went completely through the skin. It was deeper than the line was thick, and didn't hurt at all for the first 24 hours. Then it didn't stop hurting for 14 days. I will have a scar for the rest of my life--it looks like someone tried to cut off my foot.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Miss March on October 09, 2011, 07:00:15 PM
I've told this story before, but once when I was a young teenager, I rode a horse to my house. My mother brought me a glass of lemonade since it was such a hot day. I stood next to the horse, drinking from the glass, and it brought its nose up and gave a sudden inquisitive shove against the glass- which shattered into my face. It's a wonder I didn't lose an eye.

I can't believe I was so careless to be using glassware right next to a horse.  :-[
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Fleur-de-Lis on October 09, 2011, 08:34:15 PM
Eating raw cookie dough.  It's lovely, but especially if you haven't done it for a while, your body may not be happy about it.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Kimblee on October 09, 2011, 08:34:36 PM
Ha, ha Kimblee.  Where were you when I needed you?!

  Hope you're feeling better.  A few tums, bicarbonate of soda and you should survive the wedding.  Oh, it's already over isn't it...Well, backwards good vibes.

It wasn't so bad, but its only today that the queasyness has gone away. lol

And yeah, its a gift. And a useful one because i am a major klutz.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Firecat on October 09, 2011, 08:49:22 PM
Eating raw cookie dough.  It's lovely, but especially if you haven't done it for a while, your body may not be happy about it.

I solve this by buying the pasteurized eggs. Raw cookie dough, and no tummy trouble. It's beautiful.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Morticia on October 09, 2011, 09:40:52 PM
Eating raw cookie dough.  It's lovely, but especially if you haven't done it for a while, your body may not be happy about it.

I solve this by buying the pasteurized eggs. Raw cookie dough, and no tummy trouble. It's beautiful.

I just buy the cookie dough.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Kaora on October 10, 2011, 05:08:43 AM
I eat borderline food all the time.  It's kind of a talent... toughening up my stomach in case of emergency... you're not always going to be near a well-stocked fully-powered fridge.  But it has come back to bite me a few times.

Most notably, I was a teenager.  As a teenager, I had an appetite (lunch was more of a ritual than a meal... I'd eat enough to last me all day sometimes.)  We had the fixings for ham and cheese, and I love a good ham and cheese sandwich.  I also hadn't had breakfast, so I had three (3) sandwiches.  In my defense, I was hungry.  Believe it or not, we've not reached the stupid part.

See, what I hadn't really paid attention to at the time was that the ham had a strange multicolored sheen to it.  I thought this a trick of the light and oh isn't that kind of pretty and okay I'm really hungry now.  So I scarf down sandwich number one.  I scarf down sandwich number two.  I eat sandwich number three a little more leisurely, and my hunger is sated, and I am once again pleased with the world.

For a half hour.

Thirty minutes later, my stomach is pleading with me to pay attention.  Something is terribly, desperately wrong here.  I run downstairs (run may not be the right word for this... it was half-sprinting, half-stumbling) until I reach the back door.  I fling it open, take two steps, and promptly paint the back stairs a lovely shade of pink and white.  I have never, ever, vomited with that kind of force before or since.  I'd like to believe that were I mugged, I could successfully chase my attacker away with whatever were in my stomach that day, but alas.

I think the sheen might have been coincidental.  The same thing once happened with a ham we had just served-- it had a sheen like a Mother of Earl.  Asked dad, dad said it was probably oxidized, but otherwise okay.  We ate it anyways.  Didn't get sick a bit.  Still, better safe then sorry?  :)

As for cookie dough?  There's recipes out there for eggless cookie dough, which is only meant to be eaten in its doughy state.  Absolutely delicious snacky food.  :)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Silversurfer on October 10, 2011, 05:18:51 AM
Last weekend i  cooked a delicious roast chicken for sunday dinner. We have a roast most sundays, then use the meat for lunches during the week.
I pull the pan out of the oven and the roast looks amazing- its crispy on the outside and the inside is roasted to perfection.
I slide the knife inside the chicken to pick it up.
Underneath the chicken was the plastic absorber thing, that had infused itself into the bird!
We did not eat the contaminated chicken!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Firecat on October 10, 2011, 07:52:55 AM
Eating raw cookie dough.  It's lovely, but especially if you haven't done it for a while, your body may not be happy about it.

I solve this by buying the pasteurized eggs. Raw cookie dough, and no tummy trouble. It's beautiful.

I just buy the cookie dough.

I'm spoiled. To me, most of the purchased stuff has a sort of chemical aftertaste - it's better once they're baked, but I really taste it in the dough.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: cicero on October 10, 2011, 08:04:34 AM
once i had a temporary crown. i was dozing and the crown came out. instead of taking it out of my mouth and putting it somewhere safe, i figured that i'll just stick it back in. yup, i swallowed it... thankfully it was just a temp...
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Irishkitty on October 10, 2011, 10:00:11 AM
I'm an occasional victim of the "ohnosecond" - that infinitesimal slice of time where you realize you've done something dumb but it's too late to stop yourself.

Do you ever stand there futilely shouting "Control-Z! Control-Z!"?

(I do. ::) )

Wow, I was just talking to DH the other week and he mentioned that he does that! Well, he does "Command-Z" or the mac equivalent :)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: GreenEyedHawk on October 10, 2011, 10:32:14 AM
Re: eating cookie dough.

I used to have a recipe for cookie dough...not cookies, cookie dough...that had no eggs in it and was meant to be eaten raw. You could bake it and the cookies were good, but it was specifically created for those more interested in eating raw cookie dough.  I'll try and find it if anyone's interested.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Lady Snowdon on October 10, 2011, 10:58:34 AM
In college, my DH lived with a bunch of other guys, only one of whom knew anything about cooking.  One night, at the end of the year, my DH and one of the other guys who didn't know how to cook were trying to clean out the fridge and freezer and decided to cook some ground beef and make tacos.  They thought the ground beef looked a little weird, but decided to cut off the greenish looking bits and cook the rest.  I think they were going off the idea that you can do that with cheese.  ::)

I'm sure everyone reading this can guess where the story is going, right?  DH and friend were miserable for a couple days, everyone who knows anything about cooking was disgusted, and the first thing I taught DH about cooking was how to tell if meat was still good to eat. 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: LadyMisha on October 10, 2011, 11:20:53 AM
I'm sure everyone reading this can guess where the story is going, right?  DH and friend were miserable for a couple days, everyone who knows anything about cooking was disgusted, and the first thing I taught DH about cooking was how to tell if meat was still good to eat.

Oh... my....   :-X

Poor guys - thank goodness he found you!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: doodlemor on October 10, 2011, 11:43:31 AM
I brushed my teeth with Desitin.  Twice.  It tastes appalling, and it's very hard to get the stuff out of one's toothbrush.

I now make sure that the Desitin is not stored any where near the tooth cleaning things or the sink.


[For those of you not in the US - Desitin is a heavy cream in a tube sold for use on baby bums, to prevent diaper rash.]
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: JustEstelle on October 10, 2011, 12:35:58 PM
I was eating some chocolate Riesens once while waiting on a movie to start.  Just chomping and smacking away.  Had a thought of, "I sure hope this gooey stuff doesn't pull of my crown" just seconds before - you guessed it - I pulled off the crown.  It was a Sunday and my dentist wasn't available.  So it was off to the store for some denture adhesive for a quick fix.  Later told my dentist about it and he laughed his bottom off at me.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: CuriousGeorge on October 10, 2011, 12:42:54 PM
Re: eating cookie dough.

I used to have a recipe for cookie dough...not cookies, cookie dough...that had no eggs in it and was meant to be eaten raw. You could bake it and the cookies were good, but it was specifically created for those more interested in eating raw cookie dough.  I'll try and find it if anyone's interested.

Yes! Yes!  A thousand times yes!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: GreenEyedHawk on October 10, 2011, 12:49:44 PM
    1/2 cup unsalted butter/shortening
    1/4 cup sugar
    1 teaspoon vanilla
    3/4 cup all-purpose flour, plus 3 tablespoons all-purpose flour
    1/8 teaspoon baking powder
    1/2 cup chunky chocolate pieces or chocolate chips.  M&Ms are good too
    1/4 cup pecan halves, salted, roasted (optional)

Cream butter and sugar together in a bowl, beat in vanilla, add flour and baking powder.  Stir in chocolate chips/chunks/candy/nuts/whatever.
  If you're actually interested in baking them, the recipe says the dough balls should be quite large, about lemon-sized (!!!), bake at 300F for 45 minutes or until the cookies are nicely browned around the edges.  You can substitute margarine for butter with no issues.  Dough is perfectly safe to eat raw.  It's also good in vanilla ice cream.




Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Irishkitty on October 10, 2011, 01:27:58 PM
Not me but a friend:

Accidentally mistook the hair removal cream tube for the toothpaste.

Gagcht! She was rinsing her mouth out for 30 mins. What I think made it worse was that when it happened we were on a sleep-over at a friends so it wasn't even her own cream... ick.   


Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: lilfox on October 10, 2011, 01:30:14 PM
I may have posted this before, but my worst recent "ohnosecond" was going through a drive-up ATM.  I remembered to retrieve my card.  I did not remember to retrieve my cash.  Well, until I was out on the road again - made an immediate turn back but it was too late.   :-\  At least I made someone's day!

(Karma is pretty fair, though, in the past couple of years I've found at least as much money on the ground as I left sitting in the ATM.)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: pierrotlunaire0 on October 10, 2011, 01:31:34 PM
One time I went in to catch up on paperwork on a Saturday.  I hear someone banging on the outer door, and I glance out there to see a police officer motioning for me to come to the door.  The office has 2 doors, and I exit making sure that the outer door will not lock behind me.  But I forgot about the inner door.  The policeman had been responding to a call of an abandoned car in the parking lot, and when he saw someone working at the DMV, he assumed I had made the call, hence him knocking for me to come out.

The officer was nice enough to make some calls for me, but I had such a D'oh! feeling when I realized that the inner door was locked, and my purse was inside.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Scottie on October 10, 2011, 01:50:54 PM
My poor child was the victim of one of my "doh" moments. He was almost 2 and was playing naked in our (back, fenced) garden. He wanted to go down the slide but Ii told him it wouldn't work because his bottom wouldn't be slippery enough.

Aha! I thought. I can pour water down it while he slides. He slid alright. Like greased lightning - and shot a good 10 metres or so along the grass at the end. Poor kid didn't know whether to laugh or cry and did a bit of both. I was mortified. Thankfully the grass burns were not too bad :-(
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: cicero on October 10, 2011, 02:02:31 PM
My poor child was the victim of one of my "doh" moments. He was almost 2 and was playing naked in our (back, fenced) garden. He wanted to go down the slide but Ii told him it wouldn't work because his bottom wouldn't be slippery enough.

Aha! I thought. I can pour water down it while he slides. He slid alright. Like greased lightning - and shot a good 10 metres or so along the grass at the end. Poor kid didn't know whether to laugh or cry and did a bit of both. I was mortified. Thankfully the grass burns were not too bad :-(
i'm sorry but i can't stop laughing at this.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: bansidhe on October 10, 2011, 03:08:39 PM
once i had a temporary crown. i was dozing and the crown came out. instead of taking it out of my mouth and putting it somewhere safe, i figured that i'll just stick it back in. yup, i swallowed it... thankfully it was just a temp...

I'll bet that came back to bite you in the butt later. Literally.  ;D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: blueyzca01 on October 10, 2011, 03:25:16 PM
Hmmmm.......you must be referring to my husband's birthday this last August. He wanted pizza for his birthday so I made some pizza dough and put it to rise in the oven like I always do. See where this is going? Yep, I preheat the oven to cook the pizza dough and right about when the oven hit 425 I realized the rising dough was still in the oven.  :o Sadly, there was no saving the dough, and I had to scrub the ehell out of the friggin bowl to get it clean. (as an added bonus, the bread sticks I made were god awful). My poor husband wound up w/Papa John's for his birthday pizza dinner.


I did this but with cheesecake!  I was in a hurry to get started, and the blocks of cream cheese weren't quite at room temperature, so I put them in a bowl and stuck it in the unheated oven, figuring it would speed up the process. 

Then I decided to make the cookie crumb crust, and Ding Ding turned on the oven to preheat it.  I remembered the cream cheese about 10 minutes later.  And while it was runnier than I believe the recipe author intended it to be, I wasn't about to throw out 3 containers of cheese, which were not on sale.  (I thank/blame my beloved Irish grandma for the cheapness!  ;D)

Fortunately, the cheesecake turned out great, but now I'm paranoid about checking the oven before touching anything.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: pierrotlunaire0 on October 10, 2011, 03:37:46 PM
This was years ago.  At the time I lived in an apartment complex where fresh air was not allowed to intrude.  It was Christmas, and I was visiting my parents, in their so-drafty-it-feels-like-a-gale-force-wind house.  I make bread all the time, and my mother asks me to make Stollen for Christmas morning.

The dang dough just doesn't want to rise.  I pat the top of the dough, and realize that it feels cold, refrigerated cold.  So my mother and I find a better spot, and finally it starts to rise.

I should have trashed it then, because the bread was doomed.  After baking, the cat (who was never interested in bread before) gets up on the counter and starts to nibble on one end.  We shoo her off, cut off the cat nibbles spot, wrap in plastic and place in the by now cold oven to be safe through the night.

My father gets up in the morning and decides to make pancakes.  To keep them warm, he turns on the oven.  We rescue the Stollen before the plastic wrap melts completely on it, although the cat nibbles spot is now augmented by the Saran wrap frosting at that end.

And it didn't taste that great, but after all that drama, I am not surprised.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Midge on October 10, 2011, 03:43:43 PM
My shower head was getting all clogged up with hard water deposits, sending sprays of water in odd directions. It's not the type of shower head you can just unscrew: removing it would require some serious effort. I puzzled for a bit about how to solve this problem, when it suddenly occurred to me to fill a plastic sandwich bag with vinegar and tape it around the shower head to keep it in place. So that's what I did, figuring that leaving it in place for 24 hours ought to do the trick.

I keep meaning to do this with our shower head; it's soo gunked up.

Fast-forward 24 hours. I've just finished a workout and hopped into the shower. By this time, I've completely forgotten about the baggie of vinegar. I turned on the water and pulled the knob to start the shower and...nothing. Annoyed, I made sure the knob was pulled out all the way. Still nothing. I cranked the water up higher - nothing. Cursing, I looked up at the shower head to see what the blankety-blank was wrong, just in time for the baggie to give way to the water pressure and explode in my face.

And now I KNOW this is what will happen when I do.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Snooks on October 10, 2011, 03:48:51 PM
Not me but a friend:

Accidentally mistook the hair removal cream tube for the toothpaste.

Gagcht! She was rinsing her mouth out for 30 mins. What I think made it worse was that when it happened we were on a sleep-over at a friends so it wasn't even her own cream... ick.

Cousin's daughter was staying at her house and forgot to bring her toothbrush, reached under the sink for mouthwash and took a swig of Dettol.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: CakeBeret on October 10, 2011, 03:54:12 PM
Back when I wore contacts, I was at my mother's house and something was irritating my eye, badly. I went to her bathroom and grabbed a bottle of solution, as she wears contacts also. I couldn't see much thanks to the previous irritant, but it was shaped and colored just like a regular solution bottle, so I squirted some in my eye. It began burning like all the fires of Hades almost immediately, and it took two people to help me rinse it out. I had poured some sort of lens cleaner in my eye, something that was very much not meant to go in the eye. Thankfully there was no lasting damage.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Snooks on October 10, 2011, 03:57:11 PM
Back when I wore contacts, I was at my mother's house and something was irritating my eye, badly. I went to her bathroom and grabbed a bottle of solution, as she wears contacts also. I couldn't see much thanks to the previous irritant, but it was shaped and colored just like a regular solution bottle, so I squirted some in my eye. It began burning like all the fires of Hades almost immediately, and it took two people to help me rinse it out. I had poured some sort of lens cleaner in my eye, something that was very much not meant to go in the eye. Thankfully there was no lasting damage.

DH did that with some stuff my old housemate had.  Housemate had been told that contact lens solution would be fine for cleaning her new piercing so she bought some on the way home, only problem was she didn't wear lenses so didn't know there were different types, she bought the bleachy stuff.  It didn't occur to me to check that she'd bought saline.  DH had a very red eye after cleaning his lens with that stuff and putting it back in his eye.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Midge on October 10, 2011, 04:02:06 PM
I've attempted homemade chicken stock two times, and I will never try again.

The first time, I don't know what happened, but I just ended up with slightly salty, greasy water.

But the second time, that was my masterpiece.

It's on the stove, looking good and it's time to cool it off and skim the fat. So, following the instructions, I take it off the stove and pour the stock into a big bowl that is set in an ice bath in our sink. Now, I don't know if I missed the "let it cool a while first" instruction, but boiling hot stock + very cold bowl = booom!

What looked like very nice stock is now mingling with ice cubes, water, and shards of a very nice mixing bowl in my clean-but-sure-as-heck-not-clean-enough-to-eat-out-of sink.

I now buy stock. It's cheaper than buying mixing bowls.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: pwv on October 10, 2011, 05:05:30 PM
Not me, but my father did this years ago.  He was always complaining about the containers of leftovers in the refrigerator, so one day when he was home alone he decided to make his lunch from all the leftovers.  He ended it with the leftover banana cream pudding.  The serving spoon was still in the bowl, so he took a big mouthful....of pancake batter.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: kareng57 on October 10, 2011, 05:37:45 PM
Not me but a friend:

Accidentally mistook the hair removal cream tube for the toothpaste.

Gagcht! She was rinsing her mouth out for 30 mins. What I think made it worse was that when it happened we were on a sleep-over at a friends so it wasn't even her own cream... ick.

Cousin's daughter was staying at her house and forgot to bring her toothbrush, reached under the sink for mouthwash and took a swig of Dettol.


I once brushed my teeth with contraceptive-jelly.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Diane AKA Traska on October 10, 2011, 05:40:05 PM
Not me but a friend:

Accidentally mistook the hair removal cream tube for the toothpaste.

Gagcht! She was rinsing her mouth out for 30 mins. What I think made it worse was that when it happened we were on a sleep-over at a friends so it wasn't even her own cream... ick.

Cousin's daughter was staying at her house and forgot to bring her toothbrush, reached under the sink for mouthwash and took a swig of Dettol.


I once brushed my teeth with contraceptive-jelly.

Yes, but contraceptive jelly would make a better tooth cleaner than Crest would a contraceptive.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Kaora on October 10, 2011, 06:45:46 PM
    1/2 cup unsalted butter/shortening
    1/4 cup sugar
    1 teaspoon vanilla
    3/4 cup all-purpose flour, plus 3 tablespoons all-purpose flour
    1/8 teaspoon baking powder
    1/2 cup chunky chocolate pieces or chocolate chips.  M&Ms are good too
    1/4 cup pecan halves, salted, roasted (optional)

Cream butter and sugar together in a bowl, beat in vanilla, add flour and baking powder.  Stir in chocolate chips/chunks/candy/nuts/whatever.
  If you're actually interested in baking them, the recipe says the dough balls should be quite large, about lemon-sized (!!!), bake at 300F for 45 minutes or until the cookies are nicely browned around the edges.  You can substitute margarine for butter with no issues.  Dough is perfectly safe to eat raw.  It's also good in vanilla ice cream.

Yeah, that's the recipe I was going to post.  :-\
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Anniissa on October 11, 2011, 05:36:59 AM
I've attempted homemade chicken stock two times, and I will never try again.

The first time, I don't know what happened, but I just ended up with slightly salty, greasy water.

But the second time, that was my masterpiece.

It's on the stove, looking good and it's time to cool it off and skim the fat. So, following the instructions, I take it off the stove and pour the stock into a big bowl that is set in an ice bath in our sink. Now, I don't know if I missed the "let it cool a while first" instruction, but boiling hot stock + very cold bowl = booom!

What looked like very nice stock is now mingling with ice cubes, water, and shards of a very nice mixing bowl in my clean-but-sure-as-heck-not-clean-enough-to-eat-out-of sink.

I now buy stock. It's cheaper than buying mixing bowls.

My best friend finally decided she would take the plunge and make some homemade stock. After lovingly simmering it for three or four hours she takes it to the sink to strain it. Somehow she completely forgot the need to put something under it to strain the stock into and only realises as she watches all the lovely stock drain straight down the sink whilst she's left with the colander of bones and wilted veg. Strangely enough she's never attempted it again  ;)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Eisa on October 11, 2011, 06:22:19 AM
Blow up my iPad and iPhone at the same time  :P don't put drinks or food in backpacks  ::) :P

This reminds me of something. :P One time at university, I discovered the food place now had apple streudel [or something similar] in the little plastic containers reserved for cinnamon rolls, etc. Yum! Only I couldn't finish it, so I carefully placed the closed container in my backpack.

Only to discover hours later that the syrupy stuff had leaked EVERYWHERE...all over my notebooks and school books. :-[ Oops.

Needless to say, everything was very sticky and apple-smelling the rest of the year.



In high school, I felt very silly about this. I came back after Christmas break one year and tried to open my locker. Wouldn't open. I put in my combination quite carefully. STILL wouldn't open. Had to go to my homeroom teacher and miss my first class just to try and get my locker open, and I think even then the janitor had to help so I could get stuff for my first classes.

Finally get the combination. Turned out the combination I had memorized was wrong. :P The last digit was off by a couple. Since I'd been going by "sort of" just spinning the combo through the first semester, it worked. Only when trying to put it in perfectly did it fail... :D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: hermanne on October 11, 2011, 07:26:18 AM
Re.: forgetting things in the oven.

I was cured early of that. I think I was pre-teen at the time, when someone left one my mom's plastic bowls in the oven. (Why, I don't know.) Sure enough, the oven was turned on to preheat, and when I went to put dinner in I saw the bowl. It was white plastic, and the rim had turned translucent.

I grabbed a towel to get the bowl out. The rim ended up bumpy with the towel weave imprinted on it. Since it was just the rim that deformed, we kept using the bowl.

Now I check the oven every time before I turn it on.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Miss March on October 11, 2011, 08:07:58 AM
Quote
My best friend finally decided she would take the plunge and make some homemade stock. After lovingly simmering it for three or four hours she takes it to the sink to strain it. Somehow she completely forgot the need to put something under it to strain the stock into and only realises as she watches all the lovely stock drain straight down the sink whilst she's left with the colander of bones and wilted veg. Strangely enough she's never attempted it again  ;)

Oh, your poor friend, but man, did that make me laugh!  :D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Midge on October 11, 2011, 09:04:19 AM
I've attempted homemade chicken stock two times, and I will never try again.

The first time, I don't know what happened, but I just ended up with slightly salty, greasy water.

But the second time, that was my masterpiece.

It's on the stove, looking good and it's time to cool it off and skim the fat. So, following the instructions, I take it off the stove and pour the stock into a big bowl that is set in an ice bath in our sink. Now, I don't know if I missed the "let it cool a while first" instruction, but boiling hot stock + very cold bowl = booom!

What looked like very nice stock is now mingling with ice cubes, water, and shards of a very nice mixing bowl in my clean-but-sure-as-heck-not-clean-enough-to-eat-out-of sink.

I now buy stock. It's cheaper than buying mixing bowls.

My best friend finally decided she would take the plunge and make some homemade stock. After lovingly simmering it for three or four hours she takes it to the sink to strain it. Somehow she completely forgot the need to put something under it to strain the stock into and only realises as she watches all the lovely stock drain straight down the sink whilst she's left with the colander of bones and wilted veg. Strangely enough she's never attempted it again  ;)

And that's probably what would have happened if I'd gone for Attempt #3! :)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Anniissa on October 11, 2011, 09:21:00 AM
The "stock in the sink" incident did make me laugh a lot too (and her...eventually  ;D) Now I guess it's only fair I tell one about myself. I can't remember what I was cooking, possibly lamb rump or some such, but it was something that you needed to start by browning in a frying pan on the hob and then transfer to the oven to finish cooking through. Fortunately, I had frying pans with metal handles that can also go in the oven so it saves on washing up (always a good thing!). The key thing is to remember that the handle will be very hot so you need to use oven gloves when getting it out of the oven. This time, as always, I was v careful to have the oven gloves ready and use them to remove pan from oven to put it on the hob so I could get at the meat. I turn round to get a plate and then realise I need to move the pan a bit - it was only the second my hand was touching the handle to move it that I remembered it had just come out of the oven  :( Fortunately, I didnt make too much contact so it could have been worse. Boy did I feel stupid though!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: LB on October 11, 2011, 09:28:28 AM
I was preparing a dinner to take over to my parent's house one night. I needed to slice some potatoes, and I have a mandoline slicer that I had only used a few times. I sliced the first potato with no problem. I grabbed the second and got it halfway done, but the last half was being difficult. It kept slipping in the guard and I couldn't keep it in place to slice. So...I decided to try to slice it without the guard. On my first slide down the blade, the potato slipped out of my hand and I ran my thumb down hard on the blade. Dinner was pretty much ruined, since no one would have wanted those potatoes.  :P And besides, I was pretty late coming home from the emergency room. It was cut pretty deep, but at least they were able to glue it together, rather than stitching it up.

If you have a mandoline slicer, always use the hand guard!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Wonderflonium on October 11, 2011, 09:33:25 AM
If you have a mandoline slicer, always use the hand guard!

Preach on! I have a scar on the middle finger of my left hand that's a testament to that.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Xallanthia on October 11, 2011, 09:52:54 AM
I have burned myself more times than I like to think about, in the kitchen.  I only really regret two of them, because they've caused me to get awkward questions--they look like self-injury scars.  One is a thick line across all the tendons on my wrist (friend's frying pan was taller than mine) and the other is a thin line that goes down the middle of my arm from elbow to wrist (cookie sheet).

I've come very close to pouring out all the lovely stock, before.  I poured about 1/2 cup before my brain went "WAIT NO STOP!" and I fixed it.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: portiafimbriata on October 11, 2011, 10:51:04 AM
About three weeks ago DH and I bought a 1/2 bushel of hot peppers to can (sweet crackers are they beautiful this year!). I laid out gloves for DH and admonished him all mother-like to make sure he wears gloves while slicing/seeding the peppers.  He was careful to never take them off once during the whole process.

I however, am stuffing peppers into quart jars and mumbling "get in there already!...pesky gloves..." and tossed my right glove aside so I could stuff the jars unencumbered. I put the glove back on in a few minutes and thought nothing of it.

Capsaicin burns hurt. Hours later I've slathered my poor hand in everything from Noxema to toothpaste. I've soaked it in icewater, milk, half-n-half, vegetable oil, and aloe vera. NOTHING worked.

You bet your sweet bippy I only needed to make that mistake once.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: mariejkt on October 11, 2011, 10:52:05 AM
I was preparing a dinner to take over to my parent's house one night. I needed to slice some potatoes, and I have a mandoline slicer that I had only used a few times. I sliced the first potato with no problem. I grabbed the second and got it halfway done, but the last half was being difficult. It kept slipping in the guard and I couldn't keep it in place to slice. So...I decided to try to slice it without the guard. On my first slide down the blade, the potato slipped out of my hand and I ran my thumb down hard on the blade. Dinner was pretty much ruined, since no one would have wanted those potatoes.  :P And besides, I was pretty late coming home from the emergency room. It was cut pretty deep, but at least they were able to glue it together, rather than stitching it up.

If you have a mandoline slicer, always use the hand guard!

I did the exact same thing.  Except it was at my own apartment and I did leave a note for my husband when I drove myself with our toddler to the ER.  He kinda freaked when he got home and seen all the blood and no me or our son.  We only had one car so he ran to the Emgernecy Room.  It was no big deal to me as I am big klutz!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Bexx27 on October 11, 2011, 11:13:46 AM
Not food-related, but definitely stupid. Two years ago, while suffering from new baby sleep deprivation, I renewed my car's registration through 2011 and got new stickers to put on the license plates. There were 2 stickers marked "11" for the expiration year; one for the right side of the front license plate, one for the right side of the back license plate. The left side of both license plates has the month, which never changes. I put one of the stickers on the right side of the back license plate. Then somehow my sleep-deprived brain decided that the other sticker must be for the month (it was November), so I stuck in on the left side.

I didn't have an ohnosecond - the mistake didn't even occur to me until I was on the road. I tried to peel off the left sticker, but it would only come off in shreds after extensive scraping with my key. So until I renew the registration again next month, my front license plate still says "09." I was reminded of that this morning when I was pulled over for it. D'oh.

Actually, I did a lot of pretty stupid things during those sleep-deprived months when I had a young baby. Like setting down my purse - keys, cell phone, and all - in my trunk before loading the groceries in, clearly thinking to myself, "remember to get your purse before you close the trunk," and then closing the trunk anyway with the purse inside.  ::) And DH still makes fun of me for the time I poured the pasta into the sink to drain (at least I remembered the collander!) while aiming the pot toward me so I got a faceful of steam, then wailing, "I just poured boiling water in my face!"
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: blueyzca01 on October 11, 2011, 11:37:52 AM
If you have a mandoline slicer, always use the hand guard!

Preach on! I have a scar on the middle finger of my left hand that's a testament to that.

I did this, also with potatoes, the very first time I used one.  Man, my thumb just.would.not.stop bleeding.  Guards are your friends!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Ginger G on October 11, 2011, 12:19:14 PM
Just last night, my boyfriend decided to make himself a sundae with mint chocolate chip ice cream and hot fudge sauce.  Too bad he ended up with mint chocolate chip ice cream with chinese hoisin sauce topping!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Fleur-de-Lis on October 11, 2011, 01:01:36 PM
Just last night, my boyfriend decided to make himself a sundae with mint chocolate chip ice cream and hot fudge sauce.  Too bad he ended up with mint chocolate chip ice cream with chinese hoisin sauce topping!

Ohhh noo!

A friend of mine received a "chocolate" sundae.  Unfortunately, it was ice cream and balsamic vinegar.  :(
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: alegria on October 11, 2011, 01:09:57 PM
If you have a mandoline slicer, always use the hand guard!

Preach on! I have a scar on the middle finger of my left hand that's a testament to that.

Annnnd this is why I won't buy a mandolin slicer....
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: shadowfox79 on October 11, 2011, 01:44:15 PM
My best friend finally decided she would take the plunge and make some homemade stock. After lovingly simmering it for three or four hours she takes it to the sink to strain it. Somehow she completely forgot the need to put something under it to strain the stock into and only realises as she watches all the lovely stock drain straight down the sink whilst she's left with the colander of bones and wilted veg. Strangely enough she's never attempted it again  ;)

I did this the first time I attempted tom yam goong. Fortunately I had enough ingredients for a second attempt - and then I didn't like it.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: TheDisappeared on October 11, 2011, 01:54:58 PM
Hmmmm.......you must be referring to my husband's birthday this last August. He wanted pizza for his birthday so I made some pizza dough and put it to rise in the oven like I always do. See where this is going? Yep, I preheat the oven to cook the pizza dough and right about when the oven hit 425 I realized the rising dough was still in the oven.  :o Sadly, there was no saving the dough, and I had to scrub the ehell out of the friggin bowl to get it clean. (as an added bonus, the bread sticks I made were god awful). My poor husband wound up w/Papa John's for his birthday pizza dinner.


I did this but with cheesecake!  I was in a hurry to get started, and the blocks of cream cheese weren't quite at room temperature, so I put them in a bowl and stuck it in the unheated oven, figuring it would speed up the process. 

Then I decided to make the cookie crumb crust, and Ding Ding turned on the oven to preheat it.  I remembered the cream cheese about 10 minutes later.  And while it was runnier than I believe the recipe author intended it to be, I wasn't about to throw out 3 containers of cheese, which were not on sale.  (I thank/blame my beloved Irish grandma for the cheapness!  ;D)

Fortunately, the cheesecake turned out great, but now I'm paranoid about checking the oven before touching anything.

I have set my oven on fire a few times doing this.  Once I had a store bought plastic tub of cookies in the oven and went to bake a pizza.  The plastic melted and some of the melty bits flamed in the bottom of the oven.

I've also accidentally set a piece of paper on a hot burner and lit my stove on fire.  I've turned on the wrong burner and set and burned up a box of pasta too.

I set my kitchen on fire frighteningly often.  I keep a huge thing of salt by my stove for putting out fires now.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: TheDisappeared on October 11, 2011, 01:59:03 PM
I have burned myself more times than I like to think about, in the kitchen.  I only really regret two of them, because they've caused me to get awkward questions--they look like self-injury scars.  One is a thick line across all the tendons on my wrist (friend's frying pan was taller than mine) and the other is a thin line that goes down the middle of my arm from elbow to wrist (cookie sheet).

I've come very close to pouring out all the lovely stock, before.  I poured about 1/2 cup before my brain went "WAIT NO STOP!" and I fixed it.

I've had some good duh moments that resulted in burns too.  Once I was cooking something in a dutch oven in a 400f oven.  I took it out of the oven, put it on the stove, turned around to put my oven mitt down and then grabbed the very hot dutch oven.

I was trying to boil sugar once, but my candy thermometer said it wasn't getting hot and it wasn't boiling at that point so I brilliantly stuck my finger into the pot to see if it was hot.  It was.  I ended up sleeping with a piece of Aloe on my finger.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Luci on October 11, 2011, 02:36:07 PM
About 5 years ago, I left my credit card at a restaurant in Key West as we were leaving town. We run 2 credit cards, so it was easy, but scary, to cancel the one I left. (Of course I've done that in town, but it is so easy to go back to get it that it's now worth telling.)

A year ago last spring, I had been to the doctor 25 miles away, got some bad news, went to McDonald's to calm down with a breakfast burrito (or 2), locked my keys in the car. So I called my husband and he grabbed his keys to come help. He got there, and it turned out he had grabbed the motorhome keys, not my extra set for the car I was driving.

About 6 years ago, we were on the ferry to Vancouver Island and parked our tiny motorhome right next to the of the wall, so I had to get out of the driver's door - that is pretty hard, not just scootching across a seat. For some peculiar reason, my husband left his keys in the ignition, and I, who always make it a habit to carry an extra set in my pocket, had thrown mine on the floor in all my maneuvers to get out of the driver's door, and then out of habit slapped the doorlock while shutting the door. Security didn't seem too upset, but we did miss about half of that lovely ride in the bowels of the ferry watching them try to unlock our vehicle instead of in the observation lounge.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Yvaine on October 11, 2011, 02:42:47 PM

I've had some good duh moments that resulted in burns too.  Once I was cooking something in a dutch oven in a 400f oven.  I took it out of the oven, put it on the stove, turned around to put my oven mitt down and then grabbed the very hot dutch oven.


I had one kind of like this too. I was working in a cafeteria and was baking cookies. We had crummy old oven mitts that were falling apart--this is important later. I went to get a cookie sheet out of the oven and, since they were light, only put one oven mitt on since I only needed one hand to carry the tray.

...Except that mitt was developing a hole in the spot between the thumb and forefinger. Yeouch! So what did I do? Did I do the sensible thing and just let the tray drop? Oh, no. I grabbed it with my bare hand. Mega yeouch. Then I dropped the tray. From that point on, my co-workers thought I was weird, because I would never handle anything hot without mitting up both hands.

You never realize how much you use that space between your thumb and forefinger until you have it burned on both hands at the same time. Washing my hair was particularly...interesting. Fortunately it didn't scar, though I have plenty of other food-service scars.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: LadyClaire on October 11, 2011, 02:45:58 PM
DH went to the doctor and found out that he has high cholesterol. So he went on a strict diet, and started supplementing with things that are supposed to help lower cholesterol, like Metamucil. I went out and bought him a big canister of Metamucil to stir into his drinks. The first night he used it, I hear him stirring the glass of liquid and then he said "wow, this stuff is really thick..."

I went in there to take a look, and discovered that he'd misread the directions, which are "one teaspoon up to three times a day in liquid". DH read it as "three tablespoons", and had just fixed himself a glass of metamucil laced juice so thick it looked more like oatmeal.

Luckily I stopped him before he drank it..I can't imagine what havoc that would have wreaked on his digestive system.

Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: LadyClaire on October 11, 2011, 02:51:04 PM
I was eating some chocolate Riesens once while waiting on a movie to start.  Just chomping and smacking away.  Had a thought of, "I sure hope this gooey stuff doesn't pull of my crown" just seconds before - you guessed it - I pulled off the crown.  It was a Sunday and my dentist wasn't available.  So it was off to the store for some denture adhesive for a quick fix.  Later told my dentist about it and he laughed his bottom off at me.

This is why I do not let myself have Riesens, though I love and adore them. I have three crowns and multiple fillings, and I just KNOW I'd end up pulling something off/out.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Hijinks on October 11, 2011, 02:52:54 PM
I'm an occasional victim of the "ohnosecond" - that infinitesimal slice of time where you realize you've done something dumb but it's too late to stop yourself.

Do you ever stand there futilely shouting "Control-Z! Control-Z!"?

(I do. ::) )

I totally do!  I bought a sketchbook and was sketching while curled up on the couch and told my husband, that instead of going for the pencil, I had a very quick "control Z!" moment (I use Photoshop a lot for digital scrapbook designing).
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Maujer on October 11, 2011, 02:55:13 PM
Just last night, my boyfriend decided to make himself a sundae with mint chocolate chip ice cream and hot fudge sauce.  Too bad he ended up with mint chocolate chip ice cream with chinese hoisin sauce topping!

Ohhh noo!

A friend of mine received a "chocolate" sundae.  Unfortunately, it was ice cream and balsamic vinegar.  :(

This is actually very good with good vanilla ice cream, fresh strawberries, and sugar. Or at least I think so.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Eeep! on October 11, 2011, 02:59:27 PM
When I was in college I decided to fix myself a bagel that I thought was thawed.  So I set about slicing it, holding it with my left hand and cutting it towards my palm.  You know, pretty much exactly how your mother told you not to do.  So, I'm cutting away and I hit the center portion of it which apparently was still frozen and the knife veered wildly into my thumb. 

I had to walk to the clinic with my hand held above my head.  Turns out I just missed hitting my tendon, which is good, plus it was fascinating looking at the various layers of my skin while I waited to get in, but I was worried what my roomate would think coming home to find a kitchen with a lovely huge arch of blood splattered across the wall.

Turns out roomate didn't come home before I had time to clean it, I still have a scar [mumble mumble] years later and I have never cut a bagel that way again. (At least not a frozen one.  >:D)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: CakeBeret on October 11, 2011, 03:52:47 PM
I just remembered this.

Last winter, we had had a decent snowfall. Probably 3-4 inches. DH was doing something in the garage and called me to move one of the cars. I was very reluctant and said I didn't want to get dressed and go outside in that weather. He said don't bother getting dressed, just run out here and hop in the car. So I complied, wearing a t-shirt, shorts, and flip-flops.

He wanted to switch the positions of our 2 cars, so I had to back one car out onto the street, wait for him to pull his car out, and then pull my car in. So I pull my car out into the street, and DH decides that it's a fantastic time to start doing something else. Minutes tick by. I honk at DH occasionally and he makes "just a minute" gestures. Finally another car comes down the street, and I can't keep blocking it, so I decide to drive down the street, turn around, and drive back home.

I turn around on an intersecting street, which apparently got MUCH more snow than my street did. My car is stuck. I am still wearing shorts and flip-flops. I do not have my cell phone, as DH insisted that this would just take a second. Home is half a block away, uphill. It takes me half an hour to maneuver my car off the side street and get back home. When I got home and told DH what happened, he said "Well what did you do that for?" ::)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Fleur-de-Lis on October 11, 2011, 03:55:37 PM
I just remembered this.

Last winter, we had had a decent snowfall. Probably 3-4 inches. DH was doing something in the garage and called me to move one of the cars. I was very reluctant and said I didn't want to get dressed and go outside in that weather. He said don't bother getting dressed, just run out here and hop in the car. So I complied, wearing a t-shirt, shorts, and flip-flops.

He wanted to switch the positions of our 2 cars, so I had to back one car out onto the street, wait for him to pull his car out, and then pull my car in. So I pull my car out into the street, and DH decides that it's a fantastic time to start doing something else. Minutes tick by. I honk at DH occasionally and he makes "just a minute" gestures. Finally another car comes down the street, and I can't keep blocking it, so I decide to drive down the street, turn around, and drive back home.

I turn around on an intersecting street, which apparently got MUCH more snow than my street did. My car is stuck. I am still wearing shorts and flip-flops. I do not have my cell phone, as DH insisted that this would just take a second. Home is half a block away, uphill. It takes me half an hour to maneuver my car off the side street and get back home. When I got home and told DH what happened, he said "Well what did you do that for?" ::)

If *he* wanted to switch the two cars, why did you move your car first? 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: CakeBeret on October 11, 2011, 04:02:25 PM
If *he* wanted to switch the two cars, why did you move your car first? 

I really don't remember, but I think it made sense at the time. :)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: mmmchocolate on October 11, 2011, 04:27:56 PM
A million years ago in my way younger days I decided to have a baked potato for dinner.  Turned the oven to 400, popped the tater in and left.  About 45 minutes later went to check it and realized I had forgotten to light the oven.  So I lit the match and held it close and VAROOOOOOOOOOOOM a huge fireball exploded out and singed off my eyebrows, eyelashes, bangs and the hair at the side of my face.  Also?  burned eyeballs feel like they have an entire beach of sand in them.

That was a fun ER trip!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: SiotehCat on October 11, 2011, 04:28:29 PM
The winter before last, we got an incredible amount of snow. I didn't go into work that morning and was enjoying my sleep when my dh calls me. His usual thirty minute walk to work took him two hours and when he finally got there, he found a note on the door saying they were closed.

So, I run to the car in my pajama shorts and slippers. I brush all the loose snow with my arm and then start scrapping the ice off my wind shield. I was thinking of how stupid I looked and how cold I was when I realized that it wasnt my car.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Kimblee on October 11, 2011, 04:53:55 PM
The winter before last, we got an incredible amount of snow. I didn't go into work that morning and was enjoying my sleep when my dh calls me. His usual thirty minute walk to work took him two hours and when he finally got there, he found a note on the door saying they were closed.

So, I run to the car in my pajama shorts and slippers. I brush all the loose snow with my arm and then start scrapping the ice off my wind shield. I was thinking of how stupid I looked and how cold I was when I realized that it wasnt my car.

Aww, that's awful! It sounds like something i would do.

But just think what a nice surprise it was for whoever came out for a drive and found their car already de-iced! (Does that make you feel better?)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Julia Mercer on October 11, 2011, 04:57:05 PM
I posted this in another thread a while back, but had to share on this one, lol

I was eating cream of mushroom soup one day and usually slop a bit on my shirt and scrape it off with my spoon and eat it, well this time I had just put hand cream on and you guessed it, got some cream on my shirt and scraped it off with my spoon, thinking it was soup, needless to say, hand cream and cream of mushroom soup have TWO totally different flavors, lol, I was gagging for a while after that, lol!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Eisa on October 11, 2011, 05:20:31 PM
Let's see. My mom did this once. She was heating up some lasagna and neglected to check the bottom of the pan--a piece of paper had gotten stuck. It's always great to look into the kitchen and see that it's COMPLETELY filled with smoke... :P

And this would be bad, if I did not know myself. I like getting blocks of cheddar cheese and I will cut off pieces to nom. I use a plastic knife to do so. My aunt asked me one time why I didn't use a proper knife, and I didn't really have an answer. After doing this repeatedly, I now have an answer. I would be bleeding all over the place if I used a proper knife, considering the amount of times I hit some part of my hand with the plastic knife's business edge. ::)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: JustEstelle on October 11, 2011, 07:04:22 PM
Just remembered another one I did. 

I was visiting my parents and decided to make a coconut cream pie.  I put the coconut in a pan to toast it in the oven . . . and left it a little too long.  I started to smell it and opened the oven to check on it.  Introducing oxygen to the hot coconut caused it to burst into flames . . . which went up the front of the stove and melted one of the knobs.  I did a jog-in-place "oh, holy carp!"dance, going, "Oh!  Oh!  Oh!"

My mother ran into the kitchen, went straight to the pantry, grabbed a huge box of baking soda and dumped it on the fire.

Mom and Dad were living in an apartment and I had to be the one to go 'fess up to the manager, who was a close family friend.  She about fell out of her chair laughing at me but gave us a replacement knob to repair the stove.

I have never attempted another coconut cream pie since.   :-\
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Pinky830 on October 11, 2011, 08:16:00 PM
I've pretty much stopped toasting almond slivers because I never seem to be able to watch them and keep them from going from "toasted" to "incinerated."

I once took my gorgeous, perfectly seasoned Pampered Chef pizza stone out of the fridge (where I'd had a pizza crust doing a cold rise) and put it straight into a 550-degree oven.

I had just an "ohnosecond" to think, "Did I really just do that?" before it went KAPOW into 3 or 4 shards.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Kaora on October 11, 2011, 09:42:02 PM
Here's one  :-X

Mum has taken to freezing and then defrosting  entire, store bought gallons of milk.  Maybe that's okay with some people, but to me, a milk aficionado, yuck.  :-X  It tastes like the freezing separates the lactose from the cream and from the fat, leaving it very sickly sweet.

I have a terrible headache, and thought it'd be nice to have some strawberry milk instead of water with Advil for once.  I take the milk, it was oddly heavy and kind of colder than normal, but thinking brain is hurting, so I didn't think anything of putting Strawberry Quik in it.

Remember how I said it was really, sickly sweet now?  Make it frozen, ill-inducing strawberry drink, practically.  Ugh.  :-X

I probably wouldn't be so sensitive, either, if I didn't have a headache and got woken up by a certain sibling when I was taking a nap, hoping it'd go away.  ::) Tired, hurting, and in a state of consciousness I equate to being flattened by a truck...

I have more to post, just later.  :-\
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: AylaM on October 11, 2011, 11:13:03 PM
I was visiting family who lived in a high rise apartment.Bored one afternoon I decided to walk down the steps (30 floors).  Between the parking-levels and the living-levels was a fence/door.

Before I went down through it, I decided to check to see if it locked.  Because I knew I hadn't brought the key, and all the parking-level exit doors needed a key to open from the stairwell.  If the fence/door locked behind me I'd be locked in the stair case.  It did lock.  And I went through anyways.  I don't know why.  I guess maybe in the back of my head I thought I could reach through the fence to turn the door knob from the other side?  While it wasn't a concious thought, that is what I tell myself to make me feel less stupid.

I was pounding on the exit doors for a while and no one wanted to open them for me.  Was locked in the staircase for a while until someone else came in.

To this day I can't figure out why I did that. Obviously I was smart enough to check to see if it locked...
 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: GreenHall on October 12, 2011, 10:49:04 AM
KayMarie's story made me think of my own. (The thought about it being a bad idea, then followed through on doing it)

At work, I needed to get a toner pod for the copy machine. I went downstairs where the extras were stored. (small office being used as a storage room).  Toner is on the top shelf.  I use a chair to get up to it.  Chair tries to tip as I get the toner. (ooh bad idea...)
There are 2 cartridges in the box, so I open it, get the one toner I need, and....step back onto the SAME chair to put the extra toner back where I found it....yah, this time it didn't 'start' to 'try' to tip - it dumped my on the floor (and a few boxes, etc scattered around as well.  I was glad the room was somewhat isolated, based on my immediate, non-ehell, non ANY polite company outburst.  Had some really pretty bruises for a very long time, but couldn't really show them off without risking a sexual harassment case....
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: MonteCristo on October 12, 2011, 02:07:47 PM
I have one of those big metal hooks on my keychain, and I also have a bad habit of shutting my door my the door lock, since I have to push it down anyway.  Those two things combined led to me closing the door by the little knob with the keys in the same hand resulting in the hook catching on the knob as I closed the door and me having my keys being ripped out of my hand as I closed and locked the door in one motion!  It was a little embarassing standing by my car and see the keys hanging right there on the lock.  :-[

The first time I got locked out of my house was the day I moved in.  I had just finished unloading the last of my furniture from the trailer and was heading back to my Dad's house.  Of course I reached in my pocket to check that I had the keys before carefully locking my door...unfortunately I didn't remember until right after the door was locked that the keys I had in my pocket were to my Dad's truck that I was driving.  My keys were still inside.  Had to get a locksmith because I hadn't even had time to give my Dad a spare key.   ::)

ETA - I just remembered another big one.  To save myself the typing I'll just copy and paste from the blog it was originally posted in....

Okay, so I'm not totally fed up with life, but I'm certainly not too thrilled about it. I have been trying to bake a cake for our church potluck tonight, but everything has gone wrong. It started yesterday morning when I made the first one. I never should have used that stupid daisy cake pan because since it was so deep, the cake turned out raw in the middle, and all the petals fell off (aaarrgghh!!). I have a slight (well maybe not so slight, but I'm working on it, honestly!) anger problem, so by this time I'm already rather put out. But I pulled myself together and started another one. This one I managed to cook long enough so that the middle was done, and I carefully placed on a completely flat surface so I wouldn't have to worry about the petals. Then I just couldn't get the icing colors to work right, and had to make several batches of icing. (  ) So I finallly get the icing right, and start icing the cake. Well I'm not very good with the decorating tools yet, so that took a long time. Then came the disaster, right when I was putting the last zig-zaggy thingamabob on, THE CAKE FELL OFF THE KITCHEN COUNTER!!!!! I have NO idea how that could have happened. And let me tell you, when a cake hits the floor, IT REALLY HITS THE FLOOR. That stupid cake smashed into thousands of crumbs!!! That is when I lost it. Thankfully I have been working on my anger enough to retain some control, so I went out in the backyard, got a sledge hammer, and demolished an old crate that we were getting ready to burn. It is now in nice little kindling bits.  Anyway, we will NOT be having a cake at the potluck tomorrow, and it will be a jolly long time before I try to make another.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: philliesphan on October 12, 2011, 03:37:36 PM
I kind of love this thread, because it makes me feel less alone in my stoopidity.

Most recent boneheaded error: DH and I were visiting my in-laws over Labor Day weekend. I went out for a run in the wee hours of Saturday morning. I didn't take a key because they normally leave the front door unlocked for me when I'm out running.

I came back to find the door locked. I rang the bell. A confused-looking man answered it. "Can I help you?" This should have been my first clue. But oh no, I assumed he was visiting. "I'm [myname]," I explain. When this doesn't get me any farther I say, "I'm [DH's name]'s wife." When this STILL doesn't get any reaction, I say, "You know, he's [FIL's and MIL's names]'s son!" wondering when is their houseguest going to let me the Sam Hill in the door.

Finally recognition dawns on his face as he tells me, "I think you want the house next door." In my defense, I had just run 15 miles in 80% humidity, but still!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Diane AKA Traska on October 12, 2011, 03:56:49 PM
I kind of love this thread, because it makes me feel less alone in my stoopidity.

...

Finally recognition dawns on his face as he tells me, "I think you want the house next door." In my defense, I had just run 15 miles in 80% humidity, but still!

Ah, Philly weather in summer.  (For the non-Philadelphians, we have four seasons here:  Summer, Summer, Summer, and Blizzard.)  Also, love to see a phellow Phillies Phan on the phorums!  (Okay, I'll phinally stop now.)  Too bad the Phillies' season ended so abruptly.  Good news now is it's Flyers season.  :D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: philliesphan on October 12, 2011, 03:59:25 PM
Ah, Philly weather in summer.  (For the non-Philadelphians, we have four seasons here:  Summer, Summer, Summer, and Blizzard.)  Also, love to see a phellow Phillies Phan on the phorums!  (Okay, I'll phinally stop now.)  Too bad the Phillies' season ended so abruptly.  Good news now is it's Flyers season.  :D

Ha! I actually live in NYC these days (and the ILs are in another state entirely; that weekend was miserable in lots of places, it seems!), but I am still phlying the Phillies phlag. Even after last Phriday.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Diane AKA Traska on October 12, 2011, 04:09:47 PM
Ah, Philly weather in summer.  (For the non-Philadelphians, we have four seasons here:  Summer, Summer, Summer, and Blizzard.)  Also, love to see a phellow Phillies Phan on the phorums!  (Okay, I'll phinally stop now.)  Too bad the Phillies' season ended so abruptly.  Good news now is it's Flyers season.  :D

Ha! I actually live in NYC these days (and the ILs are in another state entirely; that weekend was miserable in lots of places, it seems!), but I am still phlying the Phillies phlag. Even after last Phriday.

Well of *course* you're going to continue to root for the Phitins.  Who else would you root for?  The Yankees (an AL team, so they've got the DH rule... gah), the Mets (okay, you can stop laughing now)?
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Eastsider on October 12, 2011, 04:35:15 PM
DH and I used to keep 2L bottles of soda on a set of shelves that are underneath the hooks where we keep our coats.  The shelves are at the top of our basement stairs.  Occasionally when taking a jacket off the hooks, the jacket would hit a bottle and it would tumble down the stairs.  No big deal just don't open it for a while right? 

Until one day... I am standing in the landing and I grab my coat and knock a bottle off the shelf.  It teeters on the edge of the top step and then tumbles down the stairs until it hits the basement.  The next thing I know, the bottle comes flying back up the stairs, spraying everything (including me) with soda.  IT WAS AWESOME.

I was laughing so hard I couldn't breathe and my poor DH was concerned I'd been hit by the flying bottle (he was hiding behind the door, the coward).  Luckily it was diet soda so it wasn't sticky.  We stopped keeping soda on the shelf after that.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Diane AKA Traska on October 12, 2011, 04:58:44 PM
DH and I used to keep 2L bottles of soda on a set of shelves that are underneath the hooks where we keep our coats.  The shelves are at the top of our basement stairs.  Occasionally when taking a jacket off the hooks, the jacket would hit a bottle and it would tumble down the stairs.  No big deal just don't open it for a while right? 

Until one day... I am standing in the landing and I grab my coat and knock a bottle off the shelf.  It teeters on the edge of the top step and then tumbles down the stairs until it hits the basement.  The next thing I know, the bottle comes flying back up the stairs, spraying everything (including me) with soda.  IT WAS AWESOME.

I was laughing so hard I couldn't breathe and my poor DH was concerned I'd been hit by the flying bottle (he was hiding behind the door, the coward).  Luckily it was diet soda so it wasn't sticky.  We stopped keeping soda on the shelf after that.

That's why you don't store your Mentos on the last step.

(I'm dyin' over here!)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Eeep! on October 12, 2011, 05:33:26 PM
DH and I used to keep 2L bottles of soda on a set of shelves that are underneath the hooks where we keep our coats.  The shelves are at the top of our basement stairs.  Occasionally when taking a jacket off the hooks, the jacket would hit a bottle and it would tumble down the stairs.  No big deal just don't open it for a while right? 

Until one day... I am standing in the landing and I grab my coat and knock a bottle off the shelf.  It teeters on the edge of the top step and then tumbles down the stairs until it hits the basement.  The next thing I know, the bottle comes flying back up the stairs, spraying everything (including me) with soda.  IT WAS AWESOME.

I was laughing so hard I couldn't breathe and my poor DH was concerned I'd been hit by the flying bottle (he was hiding behind the door, the coward).  Luckily it was diet soda so it wasn't sticky.  We stopped keeping soda on the shelf after that.

That's why you don't store your Mentos on the last step.

(I'm dyin' over here!)

I read this at first as saying you should store your Mentos there.  Which made total sense to me, because I envisioned the dramatic spraying of the bottle followed by the OP casually picking up the Mentos and popping one in her mouth and offering them to her DH.   ;D

Edited because "pooping" is very different from "popping".  :-X
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jpcher on October 12, 2011, 05:49:19 PM
When I was growing up, we didn't have a fire extinguisher in the kitchen -- I was taught the "slap a pot lid on it" method of extinguishing. We had a gas stove, so we knew water was usually a bad idea. Didn't have one in my twenties either.  At around age 35 or so, however, I moved in with a new roommate who was big on fire extinguishers -- she hung one up right next to the electric stove.  I knew it was there; it was in plain sight, and I had to reach over it all the time to get things in and out of the pantry cupboard.

One morning, I was making breakfast for overnight guests.  It was New Years Day, so you can imagine my state of, ah, alertness. ;)  I had started preheating the oven and was rolling out biscuits when I smelled smoke.

I looked over and saw flames inside the oven. 

I reached up, shut off the power to the oven, reached over some big red thing to open the cabinet, grabbed the box of baking soda, ripped off the top, reached around the big red thing to open the oven with one hand, tossed in the soda with the other, shut the oven door, put the baking soda box in the trash…

…big red thing…

Big. Red. Thing.

Oh. 

*facepalm*

Okay, yeah, it was a perfectly acceptable solution to the problem, and I didn't burn the house down -- or even ruin the biscuits.  But, really, reaching around the fire extinguisher twice before I noticed it?

Actually, I think you did the really smart thing here. Using that big red thing would have cause major clean-up problems.

And it would have ruined the biscuits! ;D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Seraphia on October 12, 2011, 06:09:56 PM
I had a couple ohnoseconds today at work.

I'm a contractor at DataCorp, which means I'm working offsite through my computer. So, I come in today, ready to do a full day's work. I plug in my laptop, update itunes so I can listen while I work, run my registry cleaner, and click Log In.

Computer: No.
Me: Log In.
Computer: No. Can't make me.
Me: Log In!!
Computer: No. Don't like you.
Me: Uninstall, reinstall, log in!
Computer: Neener neener neener! No.
Me: Uninstall, reboot, clean registry, fresh install, LOG IN!
Computer: No. You smell funny.
Me: AAAAA!

My registry cleaner, for the first time ever, interfered somehow with the login procedure. Which, since it had never happened before, meant I hadn't backed up the changes. That meant two hours on the phone with tech support getting it fixed. Finally though, we got it sorted out. I log in and go to pick up where I left off yesterday. Except last night, all data was refreshed (wiped) in that area. Ok, no big deal, I'll just reload the data I need. Except I forgot one thing. If you click "Load All," the computer doesn't just load everything. It also wipes out everything in there previously. And once you click OK, the process is unstoppable. That's why the program purposely blanks that button out on all levels (except the one I was on). AAAA! I had to sit and watch as my computer merrily cleaned out eleven extremely important files, then calculated all my data based on now completely incorrect numbers. I swear it blew a raspberry as it finished.

I spent an hour and a half rebuilding those files. Based on one!! misclick. <Sigh> Not my finest moment.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: KimberlyM on October 12, 2011, 06:24:45 PM
First one is my mom's.  She hasn't eaten white flour or sugar in longer than I can remember.  Every summer she buys crates of fruit at the local orchard and makes sugar free pie fillings that she freezes by lining a pie pan with saran wrap and foil, pouring in the filling and freezing.  Then in the winter if she wants a peach pie she pulls out a pie shaped disc of filling, pops it in a whole wheat (or gluten free, depending on her mood) crust, throws it in the oven and its done.  Really a great idea actually.  For my youngests first birthday she decided to do a gluten free one for her and a good friend of ours who has a million food allergies including sugar and gluten.  She brings over the pie still frozen and throws it in my oven.  A while later she goes to cut and serve it while the rest of us were eating cake only to discover she had removed the foil, but not the saran wrap so she has pie crust filled with melted plastic and peaches!  They did not get dessert.


Mine is car related and hubby still likes to tell people about this. 

We had a used mercedes that I loved, but it was old and broke down ALL THE TIME.  It was an automatic, our second car was a little toyota that was a stick.  At one point the mercedes was in the mechanics shop for over a month.  During that time I drove the toyota.  We finally got the mercedes back and I took it to do some shopping.  Once done in the store I went to start my car and it wouldn't start, no matter what I did.  I was furious, it had just gotten out of the shop.  This was before I had a cell phone, so I went to a pay phone to call hubby and the line is busy because this is also during the time of dial up internet.  Hubby and I argued constantly that he spent too much time on the internet and no one could ever get through on the phone.  After trying over and over again I gave up and began my 2 mile walk home in the rain and had plenty of time to get more angry.

By the time I got home I was really mad and yelled at him for making me walk home in the rain and that bleepity bleeping car (unreasonable I know, it was a long time ago).  He ended up calling a tow truck and met him at the car.  They went to attach it to the tow truck and discovered it was in neutral...automatics wont start if they aren't in park, but since I'd been driving the stick I had gotten used to just turning it off and setting the hand brake...I didn't even look to see if it was in park...$80 later (the fee for the tow truck just showing up) hubby had way more reason to be ticked at me than I did at him.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Kaora on October 12, 2011, 07:17:59 PM
One time, our parents were looking for potential houses to move into.  While they never did move, they did bring us along on all the trips with the realtors, so we could see what the houses look like.

We were at one possible house, in the middle of a grand tour, and I distinctly remember seeing the sliding glass doors a little open on the last house we visited, so when I saw the backyard of the one we were currently seeing, I thought they must have left the doors open for us to walk out in the backyard and see it, again.  My brain lapsed and I didn't ever realize that the doors are see-thru and closed.

I didn't have an ohnosecond, I just walked merrily into the glass doors and realized my error the second my mouth and nose began feeling a great deal of pain.  I was fine, no harm done anywhere, but my sister wondered what was wrong with me.  I think I mumbled some excuse about really clean windows and slunk off. :P Realtors weren't mad, at all, and they said we were really well behaved later. :)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: DistantStar on October 12, 2011, 07:30:52 PM
KimberlyM, my mother once did the same thing when she borrowed my car; the nice tow truck guy showed up, put the car in park, and started it up.  You're not alone.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Bandu on October 12, 2011, 08:39:54 PM
My most glorious what-have-I-done? moment came while living in Guam, which has earthquakes. I am a Texan, so was not used to such geological tomfoolery.

I was in my half of a little duplex that, thankfully, was one of only two houses on the road, the second far away. It was 2 or 3 a.m. and the dogs and I were sound asleep when a big one hit, a 7.0 of long duration.

I SHOT out of bed in a complete panic and began to make my way to the front door, cleverly grabbing my purse and keys. The dogs and I could NOT get out of the house fast enough.

I'm outside, gasping, shaking, and it's pitch dark (whole island lost power pretty much instantly). The dogs are beside themselves with fear. The quake is still going on.

It's then I realize I'm standing there, purse on my shoulder, keys in hand ... and nekkid as a jaybird!

I ran back inside, to the dog's great dismay, grabbed a sarong, and thanked the deity the guy living in the other half of the duplex hadn't been home to see the other "natural disaster" the island experienced that night!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: MinAvi on October 12, 2011, 09:07:50 PM

Computer: No.
Me: Log In.
Computer: No. Can't make me.
Me: Log In!!
Computer: No. Don't like you.
Me: Uninstall, reinstall, log in!
Computer: Neener neener neener! No.
Me: Uninstall, reboot, clean registry, fresh install, LOG IN!
Computer: No. You smell funny.
Me: AAAAA!

*snip* I swear it blew a raspberry as it finished.


I am really sorry you had such a horrid day, but I was rolling around laughing at this. I can just imagine a computer with its tounge out!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: bansidhe on October 13, 2011, 12:23:41 AM
Then came the disaster, right when I was putting the last zig-zaggy thingamabob on, THE CAKE FELL OFF THE KITCHEN COUNTER!!!!! I have NO idea how that could have happened. And let me tell you, when a cake hits the floor, IT REALLY HITS THE FLOOR. That stupid cake smashed into thousands of crumbs!!!

Oh noooo! I apologize for laughing.  :D

And that reminds me of two stories.

One: I made a lovely apple pie for a potluck dinner. I still have no idea how this happened, but when I took it out of the oven to put it on the cooling rack, the entire pie - crust, filling, and everything - flew out of the pie plate and landed on the floor several feet away in a broken, steaming, sticky heap.

Two: On a very busy workday evening, I was supposed to bake a cake for some affair at my husband's place of work. I got the cake started after feeding animals, then while it was in the oven, started on the evening housework. Being in a rush I was not in the best mood and while dust-mopping the kitchen, I grumbled to myself, "What the hell are those eggs doing on the kitchen counter?" There were three mystery eggs, just sitting there.

Several minutes later, I realized that those eggs were supposed to be in the cake. In my haste, I'd neglected to add them. As it turns out, eggs are vital to the structural integrity of cakes.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Musicwoman on October 13, 2011, 01:02:17 AM
Not me, but a tenant in my rental house.

I got a panicked phone call about 9pm, telling me there was water going everywhere from the back of the toilet.  It was an outside toilet in a little wooden outbuilding several metres from the house, with the water supply running up the outside of the back wall (important later).  Sure enough, water was fountaining everywhere from a burst hose.  I turned off the tap but it was too dark to see anything, so I told the tenant I'd have it fixed tomorrow and went home.

The next day, the handyman told me in bemusement that we were quite lucky - the toilet had almost burned down!

What???

Turns out the tenant had emptied the ashes from the wood heater just behind the toilet.  The ashes had started the wooden frame smouldering, but it was alright - the fire had burnt through the water hose and the water had put the fire out!  The tenant was mortified beyond description but I laughed so hard I was almost sick.

I still picture what it would have been like if the outbuilding had actually burned down in the night.  The poor tenant, staggering out the back door first thing in the morning to go to the loo, only to be confronted with a pedestal standing in the smoking ruins...   
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Redsoil on October 13, 2011, 07:03:02 AM
Computer: No.
Me: Log In.
Computer: No. Can't make me.
Me: Log In!!
Computer: No. Don't like you.
Me: Uninstall, reinstall, log in!
Computer: Neener neener neener! No.
Me: Uninstall, reboot, clean registry, fresh install, LOG IN!
Computer: No. You smell funny.
Me: AAAAA!


Love this!  Love it even more because I've just finished reading Mercedes Lackey's series on Shipcats (SKitty etc), and it struck a chord.   ;D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: 2littlemonkeys on October 13, 2011, 11:24:06 AM
I'm an occasional victim of the "ohnosecond" - that infinitesimal slice of time where you realize you've done something dumb but it's too late to stop yourself.

[snip]

Oh yes.  BTDT.  Always say, "Well, that was stupid."  My most memorable one to date was the day I accidentally flushed some underpants down our toilet.  YDD was PT and we were doing the hard core underpants-only drill.  She made a mess and I was trying to minimize the damage by swishing them around the toilet to clean them off before the soaking and washing.  I inexplicably hit the flush lever and they got sucked right out of my hand.  I was halfway through the flush when I realized what I'd done but they were already gone.

Our pipes leave much to be desired, so it was much more than just a lost pair of underwear.  Fortunately, we have our own rodder and a plumber was not necessary but DH was not exactly thrilled to be spending his afternoon cleaning out drains...

I'm ADHD so I have a lot of moments where I'll be doing something and the good part of my brain is warning me, "You know, you probably shouldn't do it that way."  Sometimes I'm able to stop and listen but other times...

[snip]

By the time I got home I was really mad and yelled at him for making me walk home in the rain and that bleepity bleeping car (unreasonable I know, it was a long time ago).  He ended up calling a tow truck and met him at the car.  They went to attach it to the tow truck and discovered it was in neutral...automatics wont start if they aren't in park, but since I'd been driving the stick I had gotten used to just turning it off and setting the hand brake...I didn't even look to see if it was in park...$80 later (the fee for the tow truck just showing up) hubby had way more reason to be ticked at me than I did at him.

LOL, I did something like that with my mom's car once.  And I can't even blame it on being used to a stick.  I don't know where my brain was that day.  A work friend and I were going to go out after she finished her shift.  I had driven my mom's car to pick her up and got there a little early so I could grab a bite to eat.  When I got there, I couldn't figure out why I couldn't get the key out of the ignition.  Turns out that it helps a whole bunch if you put the car in park first.   ::)  I must have spent 20 minutes messing with it before I figured it out.  This was LONG before cell phones and it was late, so I was very reluctant to call her.  I'm glad I didn't, LOL.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: nutraxfornerves on October 13, 2011, 11:48:46 AM
I make stock all the time and I've dumped stock down the sink more than once. I've got a pot brewing now and i guess I'd better attach a sticky note reminding myself that stock and spaghetti are two different concepts.

This is one of my favorite brain burps as it was actually a folie à deux. I was hunting for drain cleaner in a big box home improvement store & asked a clerk for help. He took me to the right section and I pulled out two jugs. They looked alike except for the color so I asked the clerk "what's the difference between these?"

The two of us stood there for several minutes comparing the jugs. Except for the color, they seemed pretty identical--same ingredients, same kinds of claims for efficacy, same kinds of instructions. I finally figured out the difference. We had both missed the obvious: they were two completely different brands. We were so busy reading the fine print, we hadn't looked at the great big brand names.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Seraphia on October 13, 2011, 11:54:07 AM
Computer: No.
Me: Log In.
Computer: No. Can't make me.
Me: Log In!!
Computer: No. Don't like you.
Me: Uninstall, reinstall, log in!
Computer: Neener neener neener! No.
Me: Uninstall, reboot, clean registry, fresh install, LOG IN!
Computer: No. You smell funny.
Me: AAAAA!


Love this!  Love it even more because I've just finished reading Mercedes Lackey's series on Shipcats (SKitty etc), and it struck a chord.   ;D

I'm glad you got a laugh out of it. It's a lot funnier now than it was yesterday, although methinks the computer is pouting. My connection, which previously was a pretty standard speed, has suddenly and inexplicably slowed down to nothing. Apparently, I'm mean for making it do work with the internet connection, and it wants to be looking at kitty pictures and reading bad date stories.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Nora on October 13, 2011, 12:56:15 PM

Computer: No.
Me: Log In.
Computer: No. Can't make me.
Me: Log In!!
Computer: No. Don't like you.
Me: Uninstall, reinstall, log in!
Computer: Neener neener neener! No.
Me: Uninstall, reboot, clean registry, fresh install, LOG IN!
Computer: No. You smell funny.
Me: AAAAA!


I just about died from this! It's like you are me, and your computer is the same evil people-hating laptop that I own! ;D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: LadyClaire on October 13, 2011, 01:10:08 PM

Computer: No.
Me: Log In.
Computer: No. Can't make me.
Me: Log In!!
Computer: No. Don't like you.
Me: Uninstall, reinstall, log in!
Computer: Neener neener neener! No.
Me: Uninstall, reboot, clean registry, fresh install, LOG IN!
Computer: No. You smell funny.
Me: AAAAA!

*snip* I swear it blew a raspberry as it finished.


I am really sorry you had such a horrid day, but I was rolling around laughing at this. I can just imagine a computer with its tounge out!

Me too..the whole computer dialogue made me laugh.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: MonteCristo on October 14, 2011, 08:08:12 AM

Computer: No.
Me: Log In.
Computer: No. Can't make me.
Me: Log In!!
Computer: No. Don't like you.
Me: Uninstall, reinstall, log in!
Computer: Neener neener neener! No.
Me: Uninstall, reboot, clean registry, fresh install, LOG IN!
Computer: No. You smell funny.
Me: AAAAA!

*snip* I swear it blew a raspberry as it finished.


We had a printer that behaved like that.  The only thing that fool printer understood was violence.  If you picked it up and slammed it down on the desk it would work, or if you hit it really hard with your fist.  It met its demise when Dad dropped it out the upstairs window.  (Yes, my family has a bit of an anger problem with inanimate objects, why do you ask?   ;D)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Wonderflonium on October 14, 2011, 08:09:40 AM
"PC Load Letter? What the *expletive* does that mean?"
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: amanda_tlg on October 14, 2011, 08:16:37 AM
"PC Load Letter? What the *expletive* does that mean?"

I really really really need that rolling on the floor laughing smiley thing


Count me in as another one who had a stupid "ohno" accident *because* of this thread

was making my guilty pleasure lunch of jalepeno poppers. Heard the timer go off. Opened the toaster over...grabbed the baking sheet. As my fingers touched the 450 degree metal I said, out loud,  "I should have a potholder"
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: snowfire on October 14, 2011, 10:49:06 AM

We had a printer that behaved like that.  The only thing that fool printer understood was violence.  If you picked it up and slammed it down on the desk it would work, or if you hit it really hard with your fist.  It met its demise when Dad dropped it out the upstairs window.  (Yes, my family has a bit of an anger problem with inanimate objects, why do you ask?   ;D)

 ;D  I do understand!!!  After pulling jammed bits of paper out of the printer at work for about the 10th time in one day, I told the boss that I was coming in with my friend Mr. 12 gauge tomorrow if she didn't get a new printer ASAP.  She knew that I was deadly serious.  I had a new printer by the end of the day.  (The offending printer would jam about 5 sheets for every one that it would run through.  The entire printer had to be opened up and the offending pieces pulled out with pliers since it would tear each sheet into multiple chunks which would get crammed into the most improbable places.)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Seraphia on October 14, 2011, 10:55:50 AM

We had a printer that behaved like that.  The only thing that fool printer understood was violence.  If you picked it up and slammed it down on the desk it would work, or if you hit it really hard with your fist.  It met its demise when Dad dropped it out the upstairs window.  (Yes, my family has a bit of an anger problem with inanimate objects, why do you ask?   ;D)

 ;D  I do understand!!!  After pulling jammed bits of paper out of the printer at work for about the 10th time in one day, I told the boss that I was coming in with my friend Mr. 12 gauge tomorrow if she didn't get a new printer ASAP.  She knew that I was deadly serious.  I had a new printer by the end of the day.  (The offending printer would jam about 5 sheets for every one that it would run through.  The entire printer had to be opened up and the offending pieces pulled out with pliers since it would tear each sheet into multiple chunks which would get crammed into the most improbable places.)

I had a hideous glutton of a printer too. You had to feed it one piece of paper at a time, or it would eat seven or eight in a stack, print one or two lines of text on each sheet, spit most of them back out, and jam. That one occasionally responded to threats, but it seems to be far more afraid of my husband than me. He never has any problems printing. ::)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Snooks on October 14, 2011, 10:56:46 AM
My smugness at catching the cat from in the bushes this morning was over-turned when I realised that it was wet and he'd been in the bushes so his muddy little paws were making a lovely mess on my nice clean top.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: pierrotlunaire0 on October 14, 2011, 11:20:28 AM
I did something really ditsy.  About a month ago, I ordered some books from Amazon.  They were shipped in 2 different shipments.  I received one, but the other seemed to be taking forever.  Then a neighbor brought me the torn shreds of the missing box along with the torn shreds of the books in it.  I think a kid saw the book sitting on my porch, stole it, was disappointed that there was only some books inside and destroyed it.

Now this package only put me out a little money, but I do on occasion order some expensive stuff.  I can't receive personal packages at work (HR policy), but there is a post office about 1/4 mile away from where I work.

I rent a PO box at the post office, and do another order.  I wait, and wait, and wait.  I check my status on Amazon, and it shows delivered last Saturday.  So I talk to the clerk at the PO, and she points out that on my address that I was using has the wrong city.  Although I work in Town A, the PO just down the road is Town B.  My stuff was delivered to a PO in Town B.  That PO is about 5 miles away.  And my PO box number is rented by someone else, and therefore my books have been returned to Amazon.

Despite the fact that my box rental agreement says Town B, and the sign at the PO itself says Town B.  What a ditsy thing to do.

(PS - Amazon has been so nice about it.  They immediately credited my account, and gave me free shipping on the reorder although I told them it was my fault)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: cabbagegirl28 on October 14, 2011, 06:51:12 PM
I've decided to make some letters-shirts for my little, since I didn't give her as many as I'd like. BG for those who don't know what I'm talking about: When I say letters-shirts, I mean shirts with the Greek letters of my fraternity.

However, I had several facepalmy moments.

A. I couldn't iron one set of letters unless I wanted to give Little what were fuzzy snowman letters that got melted by my iron. Still ended up accidentally ironing one of the letters and needing to replace it.
B. I accidentally ironed a small part of my carpet (It's my personal carpet, not my roommate's or the school's, thank goodness!).
C. I had to completely restitch one letter on the unironable letters-shirt because it looked like I sewed it on while I was on stuff I have never consumed in my life.

That's not my first issue with sewing though. I've had major thread knot disasters and a burn on my hand (which is still visible) from not putting the iron on the piece of cardboard serving as an ironing board. I've stuck my needle in my leg because I forgot I was wearing shorts instead of jeans (I put the needle in my jeans to hold it), I've "found" 5 of my needles while cleaning in my bare feet, and I came somewhat close to threading my lip.

I swear, I'm not this ridiculous all the time.  ;D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: kareng57 on October 14, 2011, 07:25:40 PM
KimberlyM, my mother once did the same thing when she borrowed my car; the nice tow truck guy showed up, put the car in park, and started it up.  You're not alone.


There's something about driving an unfamiliar car, isn't there?  Once a friend and I traded vehicles for a few days (both automatic) and like a PP I couldn't figure out how to get the keys out of the ignition.  I was at work, and luckily the "light" came on after a few minutes.  I was all set to go in and ask one of the guys for help - I would have been the office laughingstock for years......

And the time I drove Dh's new car to work for the first time, I managed to lock the keys in it.  It too is an automatic, but it's got the centre pull-up parking brake rather than the van's foot-pedal parking brake so you end up doing things in kind of a different order.  Of course I'd also left my purse in prominent view on the passenger seat.  Luckily it was his day off so he came to the rescue in about a half hour but he wasn't too impressed.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: White Dragon on October 14, 2011, 08:30:03 PM
I have taken the car to the shop because "the door only works if you open it from the outside, not the inside."
The shop charged me $35 to' fix' it, and showed me where the clearly marked child safety latch was.  :P

DH's boss took her car to the shop. It was making a strange sound in the back end every time she went around a corner.
The sound wasn't on one side, it changed depending on which way she was turning.
The fix? $50 and a notation that said "Removed log from trunk."
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: siamesecat2965 on October 14, 2011, 09:17:31 PM
Mine was last night and today.  I have a laptop, but no wi fi at home.  just never got around to switching.  I'm away, with my mom, and and the hotel has free wi fi.  which i cannot connect too, and the trouble shoot says "turn on the wi fi button"  Which I CANNOT find.  I'm really irritated, so last night i said the heck with it, and left it alone.  today, i tried again, and FINASLLY realized the button right. next. to. the power button is the wi fi button.  the same one i play with all the time and have no clue what it is.  needless to say, i am now connected via wifi
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: bansidhe on October 14, 2011, 09:39:57 PM
I can add two stupid car stories.

One: I was 18 when I got my very first car, and shortly after I acquired it, it developed a rather alarming problem. Every so often, it would just keel over dead. This frequently happened just as a traffic light turned green and I started to accelerate. It would then start right back up again.

I told my father about it and he agreed that we'd better take it to the shop so I scheduled an appointment for the next day. Because it happened so often at traffic lights, I decided to sit in the driver's seat and go through the motions of shifting gears and accelerating like you would do when a light turned green to see if I could turn up any clues. The third time I went through the motions, as I let out the clutch, my right knee hit the largish decorative soccer ball on my keychain, which in turn hit the key hard enough to turn it in the ignition and shut the car off.

Yep...that's what had been happening all along and in my haste to re-start the car, I just hadn't noticed that the key was turned.  :-[

On the plus side, it was a cheap fix. On the minus side, I felt like a complete moron.

Two: Same car as above. I was running errands one evening in my college days when my battery died. I found a pay phone (yes, this was a long time ago) and called my roommate, who showed up with jumper cables. Neither of us really knew what we were doing, but we did manage to get my car started - immediately after which I turned it off because I "didn't want to waste the charge on the battery."

Had to call roadside assistance after that and replace the battery.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: parrot_girl on October 15, 2011, 06:51:28 AM
Mine's from two months ago.
I went out the door
and pulled the door shut, making sure the latch was in and that the door was locked
and THEN checked that I had my house keys.

I didn't.

Sigh.
I went around the house to the laundry window, which I'd left open earlier when I'd been running the dryer, and clambered through. This required some amazing acrobatics on my part, as at the time I was 8 months pregnant.

Oh, and I did EXACTLY THE SAME THING two days ago! You'd think I'd learn. It was, however, far easier getting through the window; I left the baby parked in his pram at the door waiting for me. :)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Redsoil on October 15, 2011, 06:51:47 AM
I'm glad others have done evil things to printers and the like. 

I admit to being gleeful on the day I could finally lay my old computer to rest.  I'd had it up to HERE with the thing, and it had been driving me 'round the twist for months with glitches, sloooooooow loading, rude noises and general attitude.  So I got everything off it that was needed, took it out the back, and shot it.  Repeatedly. 

Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Betelnut on October 15, 2011, 08:24:26 AM
I got a shipment from Amazon the other day and realized that for the third time, I had ordered a DVD twice.  What I tend to do is put something on "pre-order" then, once the item comes out, order it again, forgetting that I've already got the dang thing ordered.  My local library loves me!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Zenith on October 15, 2011, 08:28:22 AM
Mine was last night and today.  I have a laptop, but no wi fi at home.  just never got around to switching.  I'm away, with my mom, and and the hotel has free wi fi.  which i cannot connect too, and the trouble shoot says "turn on the wi fi button"  Which I CANNOT find.  I'm really irritated, so last night i said the heck with it, and left it alone.  today, i tried again, and FINASLLY realized the button right. next. to. the power button is the wi fi button.  the same one i play with all the time and have no clue what it is.  needless to say, i am now connected via wifi

Whenever my computer/wifi stuff up happens I get Little Britain 'Computer says no'. :P
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: amanda_tlg on October 15, 2011, 10:00:57 AM
I'm glad others have done evil things to printers and the like. 

I admit to being gleeful on the day I could finally lay my old computer to rest.  I'd had it up to HERE with the thing, and it had been driving me 'round the twist for months with glitches, sloooooooow loading, rude noises and general attitude.  So I got everything off it that was needed, took it out the back, and shot it.  Repeatedly.

When our old printer finally died my husband took a video (unknown to me) of me re-enacting the scene from Office Space.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: kitty-cat on October 15, 2011, 10:43:45 AM
Re.: forgetting things in the oven.

I was cured early of that. I think I was pre-teen at the time, when someone left one my mom's plastic bowls in the oven. (Why, I don't know.) Sure enough, the oven was turned on to preheat, and when I went to put dinner in I saw the bowl. It was white plastic, and the rim had turned translucent.

I grabbed a towel to get the bowl out. The rim ended up bumpy with the towel weave imprinted on it. Since it was just the rim that deformed, we kept using the bowl.

Now I check the oven every time before I turn it on.

Same here- only it was mom that did it. I wasn't allowed to come in the house for a while so the fumes could go away. We had to resort to using the self clean function to just burn it off. And I was out of the house for that too.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: LB on October 15, 2011, 12:44:22 PM
I don't know if this really qualifies as stupid, but it's definitely one of those brain glitch moments. After I had a baby, it was drilled into me by several people to make sure I had everything baby would need before I left the house with him. So one day, I was getting ready to leave with baby and I did a mental checklist:

Extra diapers? Yes.
Extra clothes? Yes.
Wipes? Yes.
Burp rag? Yes.
Booties? Yes.
Pumped milk, just in case? Yes.
Formula in case I run out of milk? Yes.
Binky? Got it.
Toys (even though he has no interest yet)? Several.
Okay, everything in the baby bag, bag on my shoulder, baby in the car seat, lets go.

I stepped outside and closed the door. Realized I had everything for baby, but I didn't have my wallet, keys, phone or shoes.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: RegionMom on October 15, 2011, 05:57:39 PM
Hey, I thought you were going to say that you forgot the baby! :)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: kareng57 on October 15, 2011, 06:02:52 PM
Hey, I thought you were going to say that you forgot the baby! :)


So did I!  And I know someone who actually did this (though she figured it out after driving only a couple of blocks).

I did the reverse, once.  My kids were only a year apart in age, and I was accustomed to having them in different preschool classes on different days.  So basically, I was accustomed to always having the sibling in the car whenever I had to take one of them anywhere.  So, the first day that I dropped of DS #1 at Kindergarten (it was every day) and DS #2 at his preschool, I proceeded on the way to the fitness-centre myself, chattering away.  It didn't dawn on me till I was at the gym that there was no one else in the car, this time.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: kitty-cat on October 15, 2011, 06:10:20 PM
I've decided to make some letters-shirts for my little, since I didn't give her as many as I'd like. BG for those who don't know what I'm talking about: When I say letters-shirts, I mean shirts with the Greek letters of my fraternity.

However, I had several facepalmy moments.

A. I couldn't iron one set of letters unless I wanted to give Little what were fuzzy snowman letters that got melted by my iron. Still ended up accidentally ironing one of the letters and needing to replace it.
B. I accidentally ironed a small part of my carpet (It's my personal carpet, not my roommate's or the school's, thank goodness!).
C. I had to completely restitch one letter on the unironable letters-shirt because it looked like I sewed it on while I was on stuff I have never consumed in my life.

That's not my first issue with sewing though. I've had major thread knot disasters and a burn on my hand (which is still visible) from not putting the iron on the piece of cardboard serving as an ironing board. I've stuck my needle in my leg because I forgot I was wearing shorts instead of jeans (I put the needle in my jeans to hold it), I've "found" 5 of my needles while cleaning in my bare feet, and I came somewhat close to threading my lip.

I swear, I'm not this ridiculous all the time.  ;D

How to solve this problem: http://www.designergreek.com/designshop.html (http://www.designergreek.com/designshop.html)

I have a hoodie from there with my letters on it.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Outdoor Girl on October 15, 2011, 07:34:28 PM
I have two...

I had my 2nd storey deck replaced early this summer and I have a rain barrel set up, with extra ones to transfer the water into.  So one morning before work, I head out to transfer the water while it is raining.  In flip flops.  I took the first step and went flying, landing mostly on my left buttock but with stair imprints on my lower back and shoulder blade, as well as a nasty bruise above my left elbow.  Fortunately, I didn't land on any boney parts and was OK in about 10 days.

And the latest one was just this week.  I had to drive 6 hours to a funeral for a friend of mine's mother.  I was late leaving so when I realized about 20 minutes away from home that I'd forgotten to bring something for another friend I'd be seeing, as well as a few other things, and I decided I wouldn't turn around and I'd just keep going.  Then about 30 minutes later, I realized that I'd left all the maps I'd carefully printed sitting on my kitchen table, as well as my address book for the numbers where my friends were staying with their parents.  I have their regular numbers in my phone but not their parents!  I just kept going - I knew I could get to the generally neighbourhood where they lived and figured I could ask for directions.  I got there!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Kaora on October 15, 2011, 08:31:31 PM
I'm glad others have done evil things to printers and the like. 

I admit to being gleeful on the day I could finally lay my old computer to rest.  I'd had it up to HERE with the thing, and it had been driving me 'round the twist for months with glitches, sloooooooow loading, rude noises and general attitude.  So I got everything off it that was needed, took it out the back, and shot it.  Repeatedly.

This guy and I must have the same printer-- we have the exact same problems (It's an Epson 660 Workforce :P It's good when it prints, almost never jams, BUT...):

http://syacartoonist.com/inconvenienced-2
http://syacartoonist.com/inconvenienced-3

Our old HP 800C was probably our best printer, our past two HPs have been extremely finicky and like making faces at our futile attempts to print.  Le sigh  :P ::)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: cabbagegirl28 on October 15, 2011, 08:52:15 PM
I've decided to make some letters-shirts for my little, since I didn't give her as many as I'd like. BG for those who don't know what I'm talking about: When I say letters-shirts, I mean shirts with the Greek letters of my fraternity.

However, I had several facepalmy moments.

A. I couldn't iron one set of letters unless I wanted to give Little what were fuzzy snowman letters that got melted by my iron. Still ended up accidentally ironing one of the letters and needing to replace it.
B. I accidentally ironed a small part of my carpet (It's my personal carpet, not my roommate's or the school's, thank goodness!).
C. I had to completely restitch one letter on the unironable letters-shirt because it looked like I sewed it on while I was on stuff I have never consumed in my life.

That's not my first issue with sewing though. I've had major thread knot disasters and a burn on my hand (which is still visible) from not putting the iron on the piece of cardboard serving as an ironing board. I've stuck my needle in my leg because I forgot I was wearing shorts instead of jeans (I put the needle in my jeans to hold it), I've "found" 5 of my needles while cleaning in my bare feet, and I came somewhat close to threading my lip.

I swear, I'm not this ridiculous all the time.  ;D

How to solve this problem: http://www.designergreek.com/designshop.html (http://www.designergreek.com/designshop.html)

I have a hoodie from there with my letters on it.

I would, but I can sew my own letters for cheaper, since I got a bunch of fabric from my big and sweatshirts are $8, t-shirts $3 at Wal-Mart. But I'll probably get one in the future.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: LadyMisha on October 16, 2011, 02:08:33 AM
The next thing I know, the bottle comes flying back up the stairs, spraying everything (including me) with soda.  IT WAS AWESOME.

<hooting with laughter>

Oh, you reminded me of a similar incident!  We used to keep our 2 liters of sodas on top of the fridge.  My DD pulled open the freezer door and one of the bottles apparently hadn't been pushed back quite enough and was just enough on the door to cause it to fall straight down to the tile floor, burst in a SPECTACULAR blaze of glory and shot across our entire den to come to rest at the front door.  My DD and I looked at each other and laughed like hyenas on catnip!  Like yours, our was diet, but we were finding little splatters for weeks that we'd missed.   ;D

** edited because I find I cannot spell correctly at 3 am!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Midnight Kitty on October 16, 2011, 02:50:03 AM
Aside from trying to catch a falling iron, you mean?

Or trying to put out several flaming votives with a garden hose? (water + flaming wax = bad idea)

But my personal favorite - not my duh! moment but my eldest son's: he's at a mall, and sees a clothes steamer at Brookstone. They are demo-ing it, and he'd like to see how it works. So he aims it at his t-shirt (which is ON him at the time) and gives himself massive steam burns across his stomach ....  ::)
A long time ago I tried to catch a falling hot iron and somehow, I don't remember how, I burned the back of my shoulder.

I know I'm a klutz.  I've put the container filled with hot liquid down just inches shy of the counter too many times to count.  But really, how could I burn the back of my shoulder?  My husband at the time was abusive, so no one believed I did it to myself.  Usually correct, but this time it was me. :-[ I still have a faint scar & I still can't remember how I did it.  :P
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Nora on October 16, 2011, 07:30:50 AM
Most recent and continual stupidity is that I keep putting too much stuff on top of the fridge and I keep getting beaned by the dog treats. Then I have to chase the dog around the house before she eats 1/4 kilo of dried liver and throws up after getting hyper off the iron and vitamins.


I've so BTDT! You'd think I'd learn to put the treats somewhere else!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: squeakers on October 17, 2011, 07:15:04 AM
Be careful buying generic medicine: facial cleanser is not the same as diaper cream and does not help with chafing one bit.  Or one's ego when family find out what you did.

Exact same tube, coloring and size.. nasty irritation instead of blissful soothing. 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Xallanthia on October 17, 2011, 01:07:56 PM
Had a great pratfall at my BFF's home this weekend...  Sitting on a very lightweight folding chair at her kitchen table, I was trying to reach the pieces to the board game we were playing and sat forward just a touch too much.  I sat on the veeery edge of the chair, which tipped forward, dropping me square on my bottom, and then collapsed, hitting me rather hard at the base of my skull (right where my head meets my neck).

I sat there for a good 15-20 seconds trying to process what had happened, whether or not I was badly hurt, and how I could react to either without further terrifying their 8-month-old son, who was also rather startled by how fast I had crashed into his space--he was playing under the table.  Hubby and my friends were trying to get my attention during this time without much success.

Once I got back up and had determined that it was sort of funny, I felt a little rattled but it didn't really hurt much (I do have a nice big bruise now though), and the baby was soothed, my BFF's husband commented that he now had a real-life example of the roleplaying mechanic "Stunned for two rounds."
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: blueyzca01 on October 17, 2011, 04:13:30 PM
Just last night, my boyfriend decided to make himself a sundae with mint chocolate chip ice cream and hot fudge sauce.  Too bad he ended up with mint chocolate chip ice cream with chinese hoisin sauce topping!

Ohhh noo!

A friend of mine received a "chocolate" sundae.  Unfortunately, it was ice cream and balsamic vinegar.  :(

This is actually very good with good vanilla ice cream, fresh strawberries, and sugar. Or at least I think so.

Off topic, but worthwhile:  try sliced strawberries, balsamic vinegar and a little freshly ground black pepper...so. good.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Firecat on October 17, 2011, 05:15:46 PM
Had a great pratfall at my BFF's home this weekend...  Sitting on a very lightweight folding chair at her kitchen table, I was trying to reach the pieces to the board game we were playing and sat forward just a touch too much.  I sat on the veeery edge of the chair, which tipped forward, dropping me square on my bottom, and then collapsed, hitting me rather hard at the base of my skull (right where my head meets my neck).

I sat there for a good 15-20 seconds trying to process what had happened, whether or not I was badly hurt, and how I could react to either without further terrifying their 8-month-old son, who was also rather startled by how fast I had crashed into his space--he was playing under the table.  Hubby and my friends were trying to get my attention during this time without much success.

Once I got back up and had determined that it was sort of funny, I felt a little rattled but it didn't really hurt much (I do have a nice big bruise now though), and the baby was soothed, my BFF's husband commented that he now had a real-life example of the roleplaying mechanic "Stunned for two rounds."

I hope you don't mind that I laughed out loud at this. Because, if my DH or I trips or stumbles or something, we're apt to say something like "Oops....blew that reflex save!"
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Midnight Kitty on October 17, 2011, 05:52:55 PM
One of our memorable "ohnomoments" was when we were on vacation in DH's hometown in the Midwest.  We house/pet sat for friends.  They have a house with a detached garage in the back; Two different buildings, two different keys.  We were leaving, locking up carefully.  We made sure we had everything with us because once we locked the keys in the kitchen, we would not be able to get back into the house.

Suitcases - check!
Purse - check! 
Car keys - check! 

OK, put the keys on the kitchen table, close door, check to make sure it is locked.

Now how do we get into the garage?  The key is on the ring with the house key ... on the kitchen table ... locked in the house (http://bestsmileys.com/doh/2.gif)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Xallanthia on October 17, 2011, 06:06:59 PM
Had a great pratfall at my BFF's home this weekend...  Sitting on a very lightweight folding chair at her kitchen table, I was trying to reach the pieces to the board game we were playing and sat forward just a touch too much.  I sat on the veeery edge of the chair, which tipped forward, dropping me square on my bottom, and then collapsed, hitting me rather hard at the base of my skull (right where my head meets my neck).

I sat there for a good 15-20 seconds trying to process what had happened, whether or not I was badly hurt, and how I could react to either without further terrifying their 8-month-old son, who was also rather startled by how fast I had crashed into his space--he was playing under the table.  Hubby and my friends were trying to get my attention during this time without much success.

Once I got back up and had determined that it was sort of funny, I felt a little rattled but it didn't really hurt much (I do have a nice big bruise now though), and the baby was soothed, my BFF's husband commented that he now had a real-life example of the roleplaying mechanic "Stunned for two rounds."

I hope you don't mind that I laughed out loud at this. Because, if my DH or I trips or stumbles or something, we're apt to say something like "Oops....blew that reflex save!"

No, it's definitely really funny--at least, his comment is.  It took me a while to be un-stunned enough to really process it, but I was still giggling about it writing that post.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Sirius on October 18, 2011, 11:26:55 AM
Years ago I was sitting on one of those chairs that has a tube in place of the four legs.  I was typing on my word processor, when I noticed that I was sitting further and further away.  Suddenly the chair's tube bent in half, and I ended up on the living room floor.  It was a slow fall so I wasn't injured, but I was laying there laughing my head off when my cat's face entered my field of view.  He had a concerned expression like, "why are you laying on the floor laughing?"  (He was a semi-Ragdoll, and they have blue eyes and very expressive faces.)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Midnight Kitty on October 20, 2011, 01:46:43 PM
Moral of the story: when you lose your spare set of car keys, get a new one - don't leave it a year and a half *facepalm*
We bought a lockbox, similar to what real estate agents use when showing a property, and put it on our front door.  Your neighbors might express concern at first that they are losing their favorite neighbor, but once you tell them it's your "lockout insurance," they'll be reassured and probably buy their own! ;D

Our spare keys to everything are hanging on a rack right inside the front door.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: General Jinjur on October 20, 2011, 08:17:19 PM
GreenEyedHawk, you reminded me: I was at the park with my sister, her friend, my boyfriend, and our dogs. I had Elsie, my dog, on a retractable line, and sat down in the middle of a field. Elsie wanted to keep racing around, so I sat down on the box part of the lead. Well, the line wrapped around my ankle and went ZIP! My sister knew I was really hurt because I didn't yell--I said "No, nononono--" softly as I tried to jump away from my leg. I ended up with a rope burn that went completely through the skin. It was deeper than the line was thick, and didn't hurt at all for the first 24 hours. Then it didn't stop hurting for 14 days. I will have a scar for the rest of my life--it looks like someone tried to cut off my foot.

That happened to me too, only mine was across the backs of both knees. Such pain, I could hardly walk for a week. Just one of the many reasons I loathe retractables.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: General Jinjur on October 20, 2011, 08:34:40 PM
About three weeks ago DH and I bought a 1/2 bushel of hot peppers to can (sweet crackers are they beautiful this year!). I laid out gloves for DH and admonished him all mother-like to make sure he wears gloves while slicing/seeding the peppers.  He was careful to never take them off once during the whole process.

I however, am stuffing peppers into quart jars and mumbling "get in there already!...pesky gloves..." and tossed my right glove aside so I could stuff the jars unencumbered. I put the glove back on in a few minutes and thought nothing of it.

Capsaicin burns hurt. Hours later I've slathered my poor hand in everything from Noxema to toothpaste. I've soaked it in icewater, milk, half-n-half, vegetable oil, and aloe vera. NOTHING worked.

You bet your sweet bippy I only needed to make that mistake once.

Have you tried soaking it in red wine? That helped me.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Brentwood on October 20, 2011, 08:37:05 PM
Don't open your car's boot (trunk) and then put the keys on the parcelshelf while you switch from your pumps to your boots because you will shut the boot, leaving the keys on the parcelshelf.  This means you are then locked out of your car because you opened the boot before unlocking the rest of the car and you are also locked out of your house.  You then end up ringing your breakdown insurance company who tell you that your cover has expired so you'll have to pay the recovery man when he arrives which will be in an hour.

This means you have to sit outside in the freezing cold and dark waiting for the recovery man to arrive.  Your landlord will arrive at the same time as the recovery man and will try not to laugh at the girl in a skirt and tights with wet hair who has been sitting outside.


Moral of the story: when you lose your spare set of car keys, get a new one - don't leave it a year and a half *facepalm*

On the plus side: you hadn't locked your phone in the car too. ;)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: GreenEyedHawk on October 20, 2011, 08:42:48 PM
GreenEyedHawk, you reminded me: I was at the park with my sister, her friend, my boyfriend, and our dogs. I had Elsie, my dog, on a retractable line, and sat down in the middle of a field. Elsie wanted to keep racing around, so I sat down on the box part of the lead. Well, the line wrapped around my ankle and went ZIP! My sister knew I was really hurt because I didn't yell--I said "No, nononono--" softly as I tried to jump away from my leg. I ended up with a rope burn that went completely through the skin. It was deeper than the line was thick, and didn't hurt at all for the first 24 hours. Then it didn't stop hurting for 14 days. I will have a scar for the rest of my life--it looks like someone tried to cut off my foot.

That happened to me too, only mine was across the backs of both knees. Such pain, I could hardly walk for a week. Just one of the many reasons I loathe retractables.

Don't even get me STARTED on retractable leashes...they're at best annoying and at worst downright dangerous...as you both found out.  I was once at a local event called Pets in the Park...it's like a giant outdoor pet-related tradeshow, with animals welcome. There are always TONS of dogs and one year there was a guy with a young (not puppy but not adult) rottweiler on a retractable.  The dog was excitedly galloping through the crowd and the owner had NO control over him...the leash was clotheslining people and gave me a wicked burn across my fingers because when the dog came charging by me, I did a Stupid Thing™ and tried to grab the leash.  Event coordinators eventually asked the guy to either purchase a regular leash (TONS of them for sale at all the booths) or he had to leave.  I noticed the following year on all the adverts for the event, "No retractable leashes allowed" was added on.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Tierrainney on October 20, 2011, 11:28:49 PM
Don't open your car's boot (trunk) and then put the keys on the parcelshelf while you switch from your pumps to your boots because you will shut the boot, leaving the keys on the parcelshelf.  This means you are then locked out of your car because you opened the boot before unlocking the rest of the car and you are also locked out of your house.  You then end up ringing your breakdown insurance company who tell you that your cover has expired so you'll have to pay the recovery man when he arrives which will be in an hour.

This means you have to sit outside in the freezing cold and dark waiting for the recovery man to arrive.  Your landlord will arrive at the same time as the recovery man and will try not to laugh at the girl in a skirt and tights with wet hair who has been sitting outside.


Moral of the story: when you lose your spare set of car keys, get a new one - don't leave it a year and a half *facepalm*

On the plus side: you hadn't locked your phone in the car too. ;)

I did almost exactly this with a rental car. I was putting a few things in the trunk preparing to go to the airport and home. Fortunately, I had my purse in hand with cell phone and the rental car agreement I had just pulled out. I didn't have roadside assistance with the rental company, but the person on the desk phone was nice enough to give me the number of several local locksmiths her company used. The guy was able to get the door open and pop the trunk lock from inside the car. And since I'm very paranoid about missing a flight, I had been packing the car early enough that I still had time to get to the airport and check in with a little time to spare.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jpcher on October 21, 2011, 04:50:11 PM
About three weeks ago DH and I bought a 1/2 bushel of hot peppers to can (sweet crackers are they beautiful this year!). I laid out gloves for DH and admonished him all mother-like to make sure he wears gloves while slicing/seeding the peppers.  He was careful to never take them off once during the whole process.

I however, am stuffing peppers into quart jars and mumbling "get in there already!...pesky gloves..." and tossed my right glove aside so I could stuff the jars unencumbered. I put the glove back on in a few minutes and thought nothing of it.

Capsaicin burns hurt. Hours later I've slathered my poor hand in everything from Noxema to toothpaste. I've soaked it in icewater, milk, half-n-half, vegetable oil, and aloe vera. NOTHING worked.

You bet your sweet bippy I only needed to make that mistake once.

Have you tried soaking it in red wine? That helped me.

Soaking what in red wine? The hand or the stomach?  ;D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Schmoopie3928 on October 21, 2011, 06:36:11 PM
Here's a doozy I did.
http://www.etiquettehell.com/smf/index.php?topic=60399.msg1433733#msg1433733 (http://www.etiquettehell.com/smf/index.php?topic=60399.msg1433733#msg1433733)

Another time, I worked in a bakery/deli shop very similar to Panera.  I was the manager and one horrible Saturday I had two emps call out sick and one quit. That left me with one emp, the owner, his wife and their 13 yo son.
We were slammed at lunchtime. I'm frantic trying to get prep done, wait on customers and keep the place from going under. My only emp cut her hand on a knife. Owner has to take her to the hospital. This leaves me, Owners wife and son.
I'm about in tears by this point. I race to the back to cut more cucumbers and I'm slicing them on the meat slicer. To do this, you hold it in your hand and stop before you get to your fingers. Son is with me holding a bowl to take them as soon as I get some cut. He's watching me and says "isn't that dangerous?" I look at him while slicing say "yeah, you have to be really careful so you don't cut yourself" and pow! I nick a hunk of my thumb on the blade. I show it to him and say "see? Like that!" and promptly burst into tears. Luckily one of my guys that was off that day came in. Bless his heart. He told me it was the saddest thing he'd ever seen to find me sitting with a blood soaked towel and a tear and blood smeared face.
Mom had to get me as there was no one to take me go the hospital. No stitches, got cauterized. I get back to my car and I'm going to go home. I grab the keys and tried to turn them. With my bad thumb. Doh! And OWIE!!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: General Jinjur on October 21, 2011, 07:44:47 PM
About three weeks ago DH and I bought a 1/2 bushel of hot peppers to can (sweet crackers are they beautiful this year!). I laid out gloves for DH and admonished him all mother-like to make sure he wears gloves while slicing/seeding the peppers.  He was careful to never take them off once during the whole process.

I however, am stuffing peppers into quart jars and mumbling "get in there already!...pesky gloves..." and tossed my right glove aside so I could stuff the jars unencumbered. I put the glove back on in a few minutes and thought nothing of it.

Capsaicin burns hurt. Hours later I've slathered my poor hand in everything from Noxema to toothpaste. I've soaked it in icewater, milk, half-n-half, vegetable oil, and aloe vera. NOTHING worked.

You bet your sweet bippy I only needed to make that mistake once.

Have you tried soaking it in red wine? That helped me.

Soaking what in red wine? The hand or the stomach?  ;D

Well, both, obviously!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: furrcats on October 22, 2011, 02:06:28 AM
I took the car lighter and put hot end on my thumb  ??? Yes it was hot.  ::) yeah that one hurt for awhile  :P 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Cuddlepie on October 22, 2011, 04:21:31 AM
Have laughed myself silly reading this thread with a few ooooo nos thrown in for good measure.



When DD1 was about 5 months old, she loved being thrown up into the air and caught by her dad.  Being a nervous new mum I used to cringe and worried that he would miss.  Dropping the baby should have been the least of my worries as I should have been warning him to look up prior to playing this game.

We were visiting my aunt on a hot day. Dad tossed DD1 up..... into the ceiling fan.  Luckily fan was on the slow setting and by some miracle baby and fan blades did.not.touch. 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: GreenEyedHawk on October 22, 2011, 09:38:38 AM
Oh my GOD, Cuddlepie, I would have had a heart attack!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Apricot on October 22, 2011, 10:53:39 AM
GreenEyedHawk, you reminded me: I was at the park with my sister, her friend, my boyfriend, and our dogs. I had Elsie, my dog, on a retractable line, and sat down in the middle of a field. Elsie wanted to keep racing around, so I sat down on the box part of the lead. Well, the line wrapped around my ankle and went ZIP! My sister knew I was really hurt because I didn't yell--I said "No, nononono--" softly as I tried to jump away from my leg. I ended up with a rope burn that went completely through the skin. It was deeper than the line was thick, and didn't hurt at all for the first 24 hours. Then it didn't stop hurting for 14 days. I will have a scar for the rest of my life--it looks like someone tried to cut off my foot.

That happened to me too, only mine was across the backs of both knees. Such pain, I could hardly walk for a week. Just one of the many reasons I loathe retractables.

Don't even get me STARTED on retractable leashes...they're at best annoying and at worst downright dangerous...as you both found out.  I was once at a local event called Pets in the Park...it's like a giant outdoor pet-related tradeshow, with animals welcome. There are always TONS of dogs and one year there was a guy with a young (not puppy but not adult) rottweiler on a retractable.  The dog was excitedly galloping through the crowd and the owner had NO control over him...the leash was clotheslining people and gave me a wicked burn across my fingers because when the dog came charging by me, I did a Stupid Thing™ and tried to grab the leash.  Event coordinators eventually asked the guy to either purchase a regular leash (TONS of them for sale at all the booths) or he had to leave.  I noticed the following year on all the adverts for the event, "No retractable leashes allowed" was added on.

Retractable leashes have no place in public.

That said, a best, they're great for hiking in heavy brush, since they stay over the grass and stuff, where the long line is more likely to get tangled. Despite that, I still use the long line now, most of the time.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: EmmaJ. on October 22, 2011, 01:53:55 PM
I had a bad experience with a retractable leash.  While walking my dog, he spied a squirrel and took off galloping so fast I was pulled off my feet (and I'm not a lightweight!) and my shoulder slammed onto the sidewalk.  Two surgeries so far and I still have pain.

Everyone - throw those dang things away!  They're evil!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: EmmaJ. on October 22, 2011, 02:03:38 PM
About three weeks ago DH and I bought a 1/2 bushel of hot peppers to can (sweet crackers are they beautiful this year!). I laid out gloves for DH and admonished him all mother-like to make sure he wears gloves while slicing/seeding the peppers.  He was careful to never take them off once during the whole process.

I however, am stuffing peppers into quart jars and mumbling "get in there already!...pesky gloves..." and tossed my right glove aside so I could stuff the jars unencumbered. I put the glove back on in a few minutes and thought nothing of it.

Capsaicin burns hurt. Hours later I've slathered my poor hand in everything from Noxema to toothpaste. I've soaked it in icewater, milk, half-n-half, vegetable oil, and aloe vera. NOTHING worked.

You bet your sweet bippy I only needed to make that mistake once.

Me too.  I was making cheese-stuffed poppers for a picnic and was cleaning 30 or 40 jalapenos.  It took a while for the pain to kick in but when it did whoooooeeeeeeee.  I tried washing my hands with soap, detergent, olive oil, salt, lemon juice, hand cream - nothing helped. 

I finally googled it and the most popular recommendation was "soak your hands in milk"  Well, I don't normally have milk on hand, being lactose intolerent.  But way in back of the fridge I did find an old carton of sour cream.  An old OLD carton.

So there I am, sitting on the couch with my hands covered in stinky rotten sour cream. :P   I don't know which was worse, the jalapeno pain or the sour milk smell. 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Outdoor Girl on October 22, 2011, 04:25:42 PM
I had a bad experience with a retractable leash.  While walking my dog, he spied a squirrel and took off galloping so fast I was pulled off my feet (and I'm not a lightweight!) and my shoulder slammed onto the sidewalk.  Two surgeries so far and I still have pain.

Everyone - throw those dang things away!  They're evil!

This one is my Dad's.  When he was in his early 20's, he had a large German shepherd.  So one night, after a really bad ice storm, Dad put his skates on to take the dog for a walk.  He stayed upright for about 3 strokes and then spent the rest of the walk being dragged behind this large, strong dog.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Thipu1 on October 22, 2011, 04:34:57 PM
I had a bad experience with a retractable leash.  While walking my dog, he spied a squirrel and took off galloping so fast I was pulled off my feet (and I'm not a lightweight!) and my shoulder slammed onto the sidewalk.  Two surgeries so far and I still have pain.

Everyone - throw those dang things away!  They're evil!

Aargh, the retractable leash!  It's a hazard to pedestrians. 

We have many dogs in the neighborhood.  For the most part, they're well-behaved but their owners walk them along the streets with retractable leashes. 

The dog owner is sitting on a bench outside a coffee house or bakery enjoying the paper. The bench is right up against the building. The dog, however, is over by the curb.  Especially in the evening, when visibility is low, the leash becomes a real and present danger to people walking home from work. 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Pinky830 on October 23, 2011, 01:25:04 PM
I had a bad experience with a retractable leash.  While walking my dog, he spied a squirrel and took off galloping so fast I was pulled off my feet (and I'm not a lightweight!) and my shoulder slammed onto the sidewalk.  Two surgeries so far and I still have pain.

Everyone - throw those dang things away!  They're evil!

This one is my Dad's.  When he was in his early 20's, he had a large German shepherd.  So one night, after a really bad ice storm, Dad put his skates on to take the dog for a walk.  He stayed upright for about 3 strokes and then spent the rest of the walk being dragged behind this large, strong dog.

My son used to put on Heelies, take the dog out on her leash, and throw the ball down the street, trying to get her to pull him on his Heelies. It never quite worked as well as he wanted it to.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Shopaholic on October 23, 2011, 03:32:29 PM
OK, I love this thread! But I haven't read all 14 pages yet :)

I am past mistress of stupid things. Sometimes I wake up in a cold sweat thinking of them...

Off the top of my head:

I once had a cleaning frenzy and scrubbed the bathroom top to bottom with bleach. It took me about an hour, and then I got bored. So I decided to dye my hair with a  DIY kit (something I had done many times before). I very carefully covered all surfaces with newspaper or plastic bags. When the time was up I stepped into the shower to rinse my hair, and then I decided to flip my hair to get the water out of my eyes. The water got out of my eyes, but the stains never got off the ceiling :).

Apparently liquors do go bad... just ask anyone who tasted my chocolate balls with added Cassis liquor. Tasted like old gym socks.

I had a friend convince me to "pop" a blister once. I named the scar after him.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Black Delphinium on October 23, 2011, 04:14:18 PM
I had a bad experience with a retractable leash.  While walking my dog, he spied a squirrel and took off galloping so fast I was pulled off my feet (and I'm not a lightweight!) and my shoulder slammed onto the sidewalk.  Two surgeries so far and I still have pain.

Everyone - throw those dang things away!  They're evil!

This one is my Dad's.  When he was in his early 20's, he had a large German shepherd.  So one night, after a really bad ice storm, Dad put his skates on to take the dog for a walk.  He stayed upright for about 3 strokes and then spent the rest of the walk being dragged behind this large, strong dog.

My son used to put on Heelies, take the dog out on her leash, and throw the ball down the street, trying to get her to pull him on his Heelies. It never quite worked as well as he wanted it to.
He's lucky he didn't end up in the hospital.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: eport on October 24, 2011, 09:43:29 AM
Have laughed myself silly reading this thread with a few ooooo nos thrown in for good measure.



When DD1 was about 5 months old, she loved being thrown up into the air and caught by her dad.  Being a nervous new mum I used to cringe and worried that he would miss.  Dropping the baby should have been the least of my worries as I should have been warning him to look up prior to playing this game.

We were visiting my aunt on a hot day. Dad tossed DD1 up..... into the ceiling fan.  Luckily fan was on the slow setting and by some miracle baby and fan blades did.not.touch.

My dad's family tells the story about when I was a baby how my dad was throwing me up in the air and catching me while moving from one room to the other (dining to family room after dinner). He thew me up and my head hit the top of the archway from one room to the next. Hysterical reactions ensue.

We say it explains alot about me now.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: pierrotlunaire0 on October 24, 2011, 11:13:56 AM
This one happened to a guy I used to work with.  He came in on Monday, walking very carefully, and carrying a donut to sit on. 

He had just gotten in line skates and had gone to the park to use them.  He had adjusted quickly, and was moving at a very fast pace.  As he was speeding along, he saw up ahead a light pole.  Ooh, how cool!  He decided to snag the light pole with his right arm, whip around 180 degrees, and speed off in the opposite direction.  He would look so cool!

So he snagged the light pole with his right arm, and as he whipped around the pole, he realized that his feet were level with his head.  How did his feet get up there? he asked himself just before he slammed his rear end into the pavement.  Cracked his tail bone, and was out of commission for skating for a few weeks.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: LadyClaire on October 25, 2011, 08:15:42 AM
This one happened to a guy I used to work with.  He came in on Monday, walking very carefully, and carrying a donut to sit on. 

He had just gotten in line skates and had gone to the park to use them.  He had adjusted quickly, and was moving at a very fast pace.  As he was speeding along, he saw up ahead a light pole.  Ooh, how cool!  He decided to snag the light pole with his right arm, whip around 180 degrees, and speed off in the opposite direction.  He would look so cool!

So he snagged the light pole with his right arm, and as he whipped around the pole, he realized that his feet were level with his head.  How did his feet get up there? he asked himself just before he slammed his rear end into the pavement.  Cracked his tail bone, and was out of commission for skating for a few weeks.

I'm sorry, it must have been so terribly painful, but..I can't stop laughing at the mental image this story gives me.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Saint Abby on October 28, 2011, 01:45:38 PM
This is one happened at work to some of my co-workers. 

It was at the end of the day and I got a call from T on my office line.

T:  Can you come help K?  She locked the keys out of the car?
Me: Sure, I'll get the hanger  . . . <pause while brain processes> . . . wait, can you repeat that?
T:  Yeah, K locked the keys out of the car and can't get them.
Me:  She locked the keys OUT of the car?
T:  Yeah.
Me:  Where is she?
T:  Inside the car, she called me on her cell phone to help her get out of the car.
Me:  Where are you?
T:  Out by her car.
Me:  And she can't get out of the car?
T:  No, the door is locked and the keys are out here on the ground.
Me:  Ok, well you can pick up the keys and unlock the door for her, or she can flip the switch on the inside of the door and unlock it herself.
T:  Oh, ok.  Thanks.  I'll unlock the door.

We all laughed about the next day.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Midnight Kitty on October 28, 2011, 03:13:58 PM
Me:  And she can't get out of the car?
T:  No, the door is locked and the keys are out here on the ground.
Me:  Ok, well you can pick up the keys and unlock the door for her, or she can flip the switch on the inside of the door and unlock it herself.
T:  Oh, ok.  Thanks.  I'll unlock the door.
(http://bestsmileys.com/doh/2.gif)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Wonderflonium on October 28, 2011, 05:06:03 PM
On "Family Guy," they did a cutaway in which Peter locked his keys out of his car. The cutaways are supposed to be completely ridiculous. I can't believe this actually happened! (Not that I don't believe Abby.... you know what I mean.)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Luci on October 28, 2011, 05:49:19 PM
One time our dog and I went to get gasoline. I left my keys in the car while I pumped the gasoline and Scarlet was bouncing around inside the car and managed to lock the driver's door. I started the walk of 3 blocks to our house to get the spare set when I heard someone yell, "Hey, Lady!" I turned around and one of the attendants had the back door of the car open. She hadn't locked that one.

Right after that, there was a story in Reader's Digest about the woman who had called her husband to drive the half hour from home to bring her keys to get her into her car. Someone noticed that the back door was unlocked, so she immediately locked it. She explained that the husband would be pretty angry if he got there and found he had wasted the trip.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: bansidhe on October 28, 2011, 06:27:34 PM
One time our dog and I went to get gasoline. I left my keys in the car while I pumped the gasoline and Scarlet was bouncing around inside the car and managed to lock the driver's door. I started the walk of 3 blocks to our house to get the spare set when I heard someone yell, "Hey, Lady!" I turned around and one of the attendants had the back door of the car open. She hadn't locked that one.

Right after that, there was a story in Reader's Digest about the woman who had called her husband to drive the half hour from home to bring her keys to get her into her car. Someone noticed that the back door was unlocked, so she immediately locked it. She explained that the husband would be pretty angry if he got there and found he had wasted the trip.

Oh...that reminds me: Some time back, a friend of ours came over with her eight-year-old daughter. We were talking about cars when her daughter said excitedly, "Hey mom! Remember when we were at the store and the car doors were locked and you didn't have your keys? And you had to call dad and he had to drive all the way to the store to help us? And then dad saw the keys on the roof of the car because you put them there and forgot about them? And he was really mad?"

My friend just muttered, "Thanks for sharing, honey" and changed the subject.  :D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: kareng57 on October 28, 2011, 10:11:58 PM
This is one happened at work to some of my co-workers. 

It was at the end of the day and I got a call from T on my office line.

T:  Can you come help K?  She locked the keys out of the car?
Me: Sure, I'll get the hanger  . . . <pause while brain processes> . . . wait, can you repeat that?
T:  Yeah, K locked the keys out of the car and can't get them.
Me:  She locked the keys OUT of the car?
T:  Yeah.
Me:  Where is she?
T:  Inside the car, she called me on her cell phone to help her get out of the car.
Me:  Where are you?
T:  Out by her car.
Me:  And she can't get out of the car?
T:  No, the door is locked and the keys are out here on the ground.
Me:  Ok, well you can pick up the keys and unlock the door for her, or she can flip the switch on the inside of the door and unlock it herself.
T:  Oh, ok.  Thanks.  I'll unlock the door.

We all laughed about the next day.


LOL.  I tried to post a link, but it didn't work.  You might like to just google "blondestar".
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Dazi on October 29, 2011, 03:21:49 PM
My DH suggested insisted I post this.

I had a pan that I semi burnt food in.  I washed it, but there was still some stuck on bits.  I put a thin layer of dishsoap on and forgot about it. 

I loaded the dishwasher this morning after cleaning the fridge out.  I had just enough room to put pan in the dishwasher.  I came back in about ten minutes later to suds escaping.

poopadities!  I forgot about the dishsoap on the pan.  Luckily the suds didn't get that far. 

So I had to unload the dishwasher, scoop out most of the water and suds, then run 1/2cup of olive oil through it (per manufacturer instructions).  Surprisingly, the oil worked.  No more suds.

I still feel kind of stupid though...I am sure I'll find it funny soon.  ;)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: LB on October 29, 2011, 07:57:35 PM
Last Christmas morning I was cooking breakfast. I had scrambled eggs on the stove and bacon in the microwave. I had one of those bacon cookers with the plastic lid. I finished the eggs, turned off the burner and took them to the table. Then I went back for the bacon. I took it out of the microwave, took off the lid and placed it upside down right onto the hot burner.  We had finished breakfast and were chatting over coffee before I realized what I had done.  That lid was stuck like I had super glued it!

DH and I were standing there trying to figure out how to get it off without breaking the glass cooktop. FIL came into the kitchen and DH asked him "Got any ideas?" FIL said "Yeah. Turn the burner back on for a minute or two."

Duh.   :-[
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Dazi on October 29, 2011, 08:30:18 PM
LB, I did that recently with a lunchmeat bag.  It was thin enough that it just peeled off nicely with some help from my stoneware scrapper.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Pinky830 on October 29, 2011, 09:13:46 PM
One time our dog and I went to get gasoline. I left my keys in the car while I pumped the gasoline and Scarlet was bouncing around inside the car and managed to lock the driver's door. I started the walk of 3 blocks to our house to get the spare set when I heard someone yell, "Hey, Lady!" I turned around and one of the attendants had the back door of the car open. She hadn't locked that one.

Right after that, there was a story in Reader's Digest about the woman who had called her husband to drive the half hour from home to bring her keys to get her into her car. Someone noticed that the back door was unlocked, so she immediately locked it. She explained that the husband would be pretty angry if he got there and found he had wasted the trip.

Oh...that reminds me: Some time back, a friend of ours came over with her eight-year-old daughter. We were talking about cars when her daughter said excitedly, "Hey mom! Remember when we were at the store and the car doors were locked and you didn't have your keys? And you had to call dad and he had to drive all the way to the store to help us? And then dad saw the keys on the roof of the car because you put them there and forgot about them? And he was really mad?"

My friend just muttered, "Thanks for sharing, honey" and changed the subject.  :D

When my son's Cub Scout den was working on their storytelling achievement, they each had to tell a story. They were told to have a beginning, middle, and end. Well, the boys just would not focus. I think they were in 3rd grade, old enough to tell a basic story, but each of them was saying things like, "Once upon a time the end! Bwah hahahaha!"

So they got to DS, and I watched anxiously. DS is very quiet in groups, and he has an expressive language delay, so there was no telling. He might refuse to say a word, he might say something like the above, or he might mumble a few sentences that didn't make any sense.

He said, "Well, once upon a time I had some school work I'd brought home. I left it on the center island, and Mom didn't see that it was touching the stove burner, and she set my papers on fire! She grabbed a pan lid and set it on top of the fire and put it out, and there was a big burned circle in my stuff. Good thing it wasnt my homework, or I would have had to tell my teacher that my mom burned up my homework!"

The boys cracked up. The other parents HOWLED.

On the way home I said, "Honey, you did a great job telling your story. Next time maybe you can pick on that doesn't focus on me being a ditz..."
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jpcher on October 31, 2011, 05:51:22 PM
I took my DDs car in for service today. There was something with the brake peddle, it is "squishy" was the way I described it to the mechanic. The car also needed an oil change and two new tires. Mechanic called me to tell me that he found something else wrong with the car . . . to the tune of almost $900 (a must fix if I want to keep the car). Yikes!

Back to the brakes . . . he told me it had something to do with the anti-lock system. Blah, blah, blah, he explained about possible causes and it might be close to $300, maybe not so much, depending on what he found.

I asked the mechanic if we could by-pass the anti-lock brakes. I know many cars out there don't have this feature.

He told me that if I knew which fuse to pull it was my right to do so. But, legally, he was not allow to do this.


Then it dawned on me. I was actually asking my mechanic to disengage a safety feature on my DDs car. Just to save a few bucks.

Yeah. I felt pretty stupid. ::)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: mbbored on October 31, 2011, 08:40:06 PM
My evening:

I come in the front door with my arms full of groceries, and decide to put the milk away first so I don't leave it out all night. I then run up the stairs to let the pup out, and take him for a quick walk before ToTers take over the neighborhood. Except, I never bothered to close the front door.

So, he got a good run, the kids and their parents got a good laugh and I met a guardian angel who helped me heard him into a corner and tackle him.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Saint Abby on November 02, 2011, 01:44:19 PM
This is one happened at work to some of my co-workers. 

It was at the end of the day and I got a call from T on my office line.

T:  Can you come help K?  She locked the keys out of the car?
Me: Sure, I'll get the hanger  . . . <pause while brain processes> . . . wait, can you repeat that?
T:  Yeah, K locked the keys out of the car and can't get them.
Me:  She locked the keys OUT of the car?
T:  Yeah.
Me:  Where is she?
T:  Inside the car, she called me on her cell phone to help her get out of the car.
Me:  Where are you?
T:  Out by her car.
Me:  And she can't get out of the car?
T:  No, the door is locked and the keys are out here on the ground.
Me:  Ok, well you can pick up the keys and unlock the door for her, or she can flip the switch on the inside of the door and unlock it herself.
T:  Oh, ok.  Thanks.  I'll unlock the door.

We all laughed about the next day.


LOL.  I tried to post a link, but it didn't work.  You might like to just google "blondestar".

That is awesome.  The first one I found was of a girl locked IN her car . . . with the keys in the ignition.  It sounded vaguely familiar  ;)

I also saw that Family Guy episode after the above incident.  My DH and I thought it was hysterical.

I have more from the same workers.  Like the time they called my voice mail, and left a hysterical message that they were being attacked by water buffalo and I needed to call security to help them get out of the building.  Yup, a water buffalo . . . in Boston.  (The terrifying animal in question was a gopher).  I did not call security and advised them to leave through the side door 20 feet down if they were concerned about the gopher.

Dear ladies, and I love them to death.  They keep work entertaining  ;D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Fleur-de-Lis on November 02, 2011, 01:54:42 PM
When you cannot deny the evidence that the milk has turned, even if you are a week out from the "best by" date, go ahead and throw away the box of milk, not just the cup you made your cafe au lait with. 

(Fortunately I caught the error before I tried to use the milk again.)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: blueyzca01 on November 02, 2011, 06:14:05 PM

Right after that, there was a story in Reader's Digest about the woman who had called her husband to drive the half hour from home to bring her keys to get her into her car. Someone noticed that the back door was unlocked, so she immediately locked it. She explained that the husband would be pretty angry if he got there and found he had wasted the trip.

oh, I had something similar happen!

DF and I were moving in together.  He needed to drive to a city about 1 hour away to pick up some stuff and then come back.  I locked myself out of the new apartment, and called DF to please hurry back.  No one was around and it was cold and dark, and our building had been burgled recently. 

While I was sitting outside, my neighbor (who’s RARELY home) arrived and invited me in to wait it out.  And offered me some wine and we got to talking.  So, no more emergency, right? 
I NEVER CALLED DF. 

He arrives at the front door about 30 minutes later, heard me laughing and found out I was perfectly safe and happy and drinking wine. After he sped like a batoutofhe!! to get to me.  And then he got to hear that I just plumb forgot about him.   Yeah, I’ve never seen him that angry. 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: MizB on November 03, 2011, 12:18:33 AM
We used to work split shifts at my job. One day I came home and was doing dishes in my work clothes but wearing slippers. It was time for me to leave and I grab my keys and go. I was over halfway to work when I realized I never put my work shoes back on.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: laud_shy_girl on November 03, 2011, 05:31:05 AM
This is one happened at work to some of my co-workers. 

It was at the end of the day and I got a call from T on my office line.

T:  Can you come help K?  She locked the keys out of the car?
Me: Sure, I'll get the hanger  . . . <pause while brain processes> . . . wait, can you repeat that?
T:  Yeah, K locked the keys out of the car and can't get them.
Me:  She locked the keys OUT of the car?
T:  Yeah.
Me:  Where is she?
T:  Inside the car, she called me on her cell phone to help her get out of the car.
Me:  Where are you?
T:  Out by her car.
Me:  And she can't get out of the car?
T:  No, the door is locked and the keys are out here on the ground.
Me:  Ok, well you can pick up the keys and unlock the door for her, or she can flip the switch on the inside of the door and unlock it herself.
T:  Oh, ok.  Thanks.  I'll unlock the door.

We all laughed about the next day.

This person might benefit from rading this thread.

http://cars.failblog.org/2011/10/25/funny-car-photos-britsh-columbia-car-thief-locks-in/ (http://cars.failblog.org/2011/10/25/funny-car-photos-britsh-columbia-car-thief-locks-in/)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: wonderfullyanonymous on November 03, 2011, 08:37:19 AM
I don't like canned frosting, so when time permits, I make my own. A couple weeks ago, I made a killer cream cheese frosting. Last week, I wanted to make an equally killer vanilla frosting. The recipe calls for extra milk to make the frosting more spreadable. I wanted to add a dash more vanilla.

Since I like to just eyeball my measure, I started to tip the bottle, I made my dash, went  to tip the bottle up, and bumped my elbow. Lovely, just lovely, I now have something close to a drizzle but doesn't look nearly as appetizing. I am out of powedered sugar, so I finished mixing it, and put it in the fridge to thicken (hopefully) a little.

I frosted my cake, apologized to my guys for my mistake and said eat it or not.

They liked it, surprisingly me, not so much, but I am my own worst critic. The extra vanilla added a cinnamony flavor, which kind of made up for my mistake, kind of.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Sterling on November 03, 2011, 08:54:40 AM
Yesterday was a very very bad day at work and my fiance was sick at home.  He offered to go pick up dinner but I said no we should save the money and eat it.  I would just make something fast.  Well oneo f the itemms I decided to make was  mac and cheese.  he loves it and I can tolerate it thought I prefer to make it from scratch.  Last night though I made the boxed kind with the orange powder.

I was still fuming over the bad day I had so I guess I didn't pay much attention to what I was doing until Leo came in to eat and asked me why the mac n cheese looked brown.  I had used my organic chocolate like to mix it up  ::)

At that point I just looked at him and we ordered pizza.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: MrTango on November 03, 2011, 09:35:44 AM
My DH suggested insisted I post this.

I had a pan that I semi burnt food in.  I washed it, but there was still some stuck on bits.  I put a thin layer of dishsoap on and forgot about it. 

I loaded the dishwasher this morning after cleaning the fridge out.  I had just enough room to put pan in the dishwasher.  I came back in about ten minutes later to suds escaping.

poopadities!  I forgot about the dishsoap on the pan.  Luckily the suds didn't get that far. 

So I had to unload the dishwasher, scoop out most of the water and suds, then run 1/2cup of olive oil through it (per manufacturer instructions).  Surprisingly, the oil worked.  No more suds.

I still feel kind of stupid though...I am sure I'll find it funny soon.  ;)

When I was six years old, I was down in the basement playing with the ping-pong table when I noticed water dripping down from the ceiling.  My sisters (11 & 12) were babysitting me while my parents were at work.  I ran up to the living room (1/2 level up in our split-level house) and told my sisters what was happening, but they didn't believe me.  I then went up another half flight to the kitchen and noticed suds about 6 inches deep on the kitchen floor.

Finally, one of my sisters came up and saw the mess, and they managed to get about half of it cleaned up before our mom got home from work.

Turns out they filled both of the dishwasher's soap trays full of Dawn.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Twik on November 03, 2011, 11:57:39 AM
I ate a live bug once, because I was told they were a local snack. That was probably pretty dumb, now I think back on it.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: General Jinjur on November 03, 2011, 12:20:25 PM
Um...what kind of bug?
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Luci on November 03, 2011, 12:24:46 PM
Where?
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Brentwood on November 05, 2011, 05:34:55 PM

When I was six years old, I was down in the basement playing with the ping-pong table when I noticed water dripping down from the ceiling.  My sisters (11 & 12) were babysitting me while my parents were at work.  I ran up to the living room (1/2 level up in our split-level house) and told my sisters what was happening, but they didn't believe me.  I then went up another half flight to the kitchen and noticed suds about 6 inches deep on the kitchen floor.

Finally, one of my sisters came up and saw the mess, and they managed to get about half of it cleaned up before our mom got home from work.

Turns out they filled both of the dishwasher's soap trays full of Dawn.

Awww...I'm thinking of how awful my own 11-year-old daughter would feel if she'd done something like that...especially if she was only trying to do what she was supposed to do.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: General Jinjur on November 05, 2011, 08:48:57 PM
Last night as I was readying the Nom for bed, I stripped him naked before his bath. Then realized...whoops, I forgot to run the bathwater. No problem, I figured, I'll just put him in a cloth diaper for a couple of minutes and go fix the bath. I had forgotten he knows how to open the velcro ones  ::) I came back in to find the diaper on the floor, and the Nom with his arms raised in triumph, like woo hoo! freedom!

Fortunately, he had peed in the diaper before taking it off. Unfortunately, there was something more solid directly after. One minute of dumb and suddenly I'm doing laundry....
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: cabbagegirl28 on November 05, 2011, 09:30:53 PM

When I was six years old, I was down in the basement playing with the ping-pong table when I noticed water dripping down from the ceiling.  My sisters (11 & 12) were babysitting me while my parents were at work.  I ran up to the living room (1/2 level up in our split-level house) and told my sisters what was happening, but they didn't believe me.  I then went up another half flight to the kitchen and noticed suds about 6 inches deep on the kitchen floor.

Finally, one of my sisters came up and saw the mess, and they managed to get about half of it cleaned up before our mom got home from work.

Turns out they filled both of the dishwasher's soap trays full of Dawn.

Awww...I'm thinking of how awful my own 11-year-old daughter would feel if she'd done something like that...especially if she was only trying to do what she was supposed to do.

violinp and I tried to "help" Dad by washing his van...with his body soap.  ::) at self
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: kareng57 on November 05, 2011, 09:54:46 PM

When I was six years old, I was down in the basement playing with the ping-pong table when I noticed water dripping down from the ceiling.  My sisters (11 & 12) were babysitting me while my parents were at work.  I ran up to the living room (1/2 level up in our split-level house) and told my sisters what was happening, but they didn't believe me.  I then went up another half flight to the kitchen and noticed suds about 6 inches deep on the kitchen floor.

Finally, one of my sisters came up and saw the mess, and they managed to get about half of it cleaned up before our mom got home from work.

Turns out they filled both of the dishwasher's soap trays full of Dawn.

Awww...I'm thinking of how awful my own 11-year-old daughter would feel if she'd done something like that...especially if she was only trying to do what she was supposed to do.

violinp and I tried to "help" Dad by washing his van...with his body soap.  ::) at self


Dh "helped" his dad wash the car with an SOS pad, 50+ years ago.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Harriet Jones on November 05, 2011, 09:58:35 PM
My middle daughter "drew" all over our minivan with a rock.  She got every single panel.  The insurance inspector asked "Do you have an enemy?"  I answered, "No, I have a 3 year old."  :-\
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: GreenEyedHawk on November 06, 2011, 08:20:09 AM
My sister once put laundry soap in the dishwasher, I guess figuring that powdered soap was powdered soap.  There were a lot of suds.  I laughed, because I'm a jerk.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: hermanne on November 06, 2011, 08:43:43 AM
Last night as I was readying the Nom for bed, I stripped him naked before his bath. Then realized...whoops, I forgot to run the bathwater. No problem, I figured, I'll just put him in a cloth diaper for a couple of minutes and go fix the bath. I had forgotten he knows how to open the velcro ones  ::) I came back in to find the diaper on the floor, and the Nom with his arms raised in triumph, like woo hoo! freedom!

Fortunately, he had peed in the diaper before taking it off. Unfortunately, there was something more solid directly after. One minute of dumb and suddenly I'm doing laundry....

"You canna take away me freedom!"
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: cicero on November 06, 2011, 09:43:17 AM
If you have a mandoline slicer, always use the hand guard!

Preach on! I have a scar on the middle finger of my left hand that's a testament to that.

Annnnd this is why I won't buy a mandolin slicer....
annnnnd this is why i threw mine out. i never cut myself on it but i got so freaked out about the fact that i might someday cut myself that i set it free
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: GreenEyedHawk on November 06, 2011, 01:30:39 PM
Okay, I did something stupid.  Stupid stupid.  And it hurt a LOT.

I'm making chicken gumbo today, which involves, among other things, chopping up jalapenos.  I thought about what a few of you here have mentioned, rubbing your eyes and stuff, and was careful not to touch the insides of the peppers, and was doubly careful about not touching my eyes or face.  However, I did get a little jalapeno juice on my fingers, so I wiped them off (til I could properly wash my hands) on my opposite forearm.

Which was just tattooed.  Yesterday.

Cue a LOT of squealing and the Angry Pain Dance™.  I'm also pretty sure I scared the beans out of every living thing in the house.  Both dogs fled for the living room, all three cats fled to the basement.  Sorry everyone, I'm an idiot.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Nora on November 06, 2011, 02:02:40 PM
That hurt me just by reading it!!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: CakeBeret on November 06, 2011, 03:38:29 PM
I'm cringing and clutching my recent tattoo in horror.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Doll Fiend on November 06, 2011, 06:32:10 PM
If you have a mandoline slicer, always use the hand guard!

Preach on! I have a scar on the middle finger of my left hand that's a testament to that.

Annnnd this is why I won't buy a mandolin slicer....
annnnnd this is why i threw mine out. i never cut myself on it but i got so freaked out about the fact that i might someday cut myself that i set it free

Kevlar gloves. Not that I know the best place to get them but Alton Brown swears by them when using his mandolin.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Otterpop on November 06, 2011, 09:03:00 PM
I'm wincing just reading about a mandolin.  Was using my aunt's to slice tomatoes and brushed my fingertip against the blade accidentally.  Quickly checked finger, *phew* no pain, no blood.  Must have been lucky.  Begin slicing tomatoes again, boy these are juicy...oh, my...cue throbbing and fainting.  Mandolin was so sharp I didn't feel it until minutes later.  Took seven stitches to close the wound.  Never touched one again.  I know they're handy but I.just.can't.  Took me awhile to eat a tomato again too.

I do love my Cuisinart food processor though.  Use a little plastic plunger to push veggies against the blade in an enclosed container.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Solanna Dryden on November 06, 2011, 09:04:13 PM
In the shower today, happily daydreaming about something else. I shaved my underarms. Then I poured the shampoo into my hand...and applied it to my underarms. I was like, "this shaving cream feels weird." Then I realized what I'd done, and smacked myself.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: GreenEyedHawk on November 06, 2011, 09:12:39 PM
In the shower today, happily daydreaming about something else. I shaved my underarms. Then I poured the shampoo into my hand...and applied it to my underarms. I was like, "this shaving cream feels weird." Then I realized what I'd done, and smacked myself.

I did the same thing once, but it was with Clearasil.  And I put it in my hair.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Zenith on November 06, 2011, 11:43:40 PM
In the shower today, happily daydreaming about something else. I shaved my underarms. Then I poured the shampoo into my hand...and applied it to my underarms. I was like, "this shaving cream feels weird." Then I realized what I'd done, and smacked myself.

I did the same thing once, but it was with Clearasil.  And I put it in my hair.

I superglued my lips together thinking it was lip balm. That is now why I only use lip balm in lipstick tubes now.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: cabbagegirl28 on November 06, 2011, 11:47:01 PM
In the shower today, happily daydreaming about something else. I shaved my underarms. Then I poured the shampoo into my hand...and applied it to my underarms. I was like, "this shaving cream feels weird." Then I realized what I'd done, and smacked myself.

I did the same thing once, but it was with Clearasil.  And I put it in my hair.

I superglued my lips together thinking it was lip balm. That is now why I only use lip balm in lipstick tubes now.

Ouch! That sounds painful! :(
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Rohanna on November 06, 2011, 11:47:34 PM
You know those tubes of conditioner you get in home hair dye? When you're really sleepy, it's perfectly possible to mistake them for your toothpaste  :-X
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: hannahmollysmom on November 07, 2011, 01:00:28 AM
I have too many to list!
This one was a joint effort between ex-DH and I. With 2 daughters and myself having long hair, the drain for the tub was running real slow.

It had been suggest to us to open the pipe under the tub and clean it out. We were down cellar, and I was holding the bucket as he unscrewed the flat plate at the elbow area. Well, after it was loose, he kept it flat and all the stinky stuff (ewww)  hit the plate and with the natural law of physics, it splashed out all over the two of us. None went in the bucket! So we proceeded over to the washer to strip. Then realized we had to make it upstairs to the bathroom to finish cleaning up with teenagers and their friends sitting in the living room just outside the cellar door. And of course, for once I had brought all the laundry up and put it away so nothing to cover with. Still don't know if they saw white blurs crossing the hall or not. No one said anything!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Doll Fiend on November 07, 2011, 01:47:53 AM
In the shower today, happily daydreaming about something else. I shaved my underarms. Then I poured the shampoo into my hand...and applied it to my underarms. I was like, "this shaving cream feels weird." Then I realized what I'd done, and smacked myself.

I did the same thing once, but it was with Clearasil.  And I put it in my hair.

I superglued my lips together thinking it was lip balm. That is now why I only use lip balm in lipstick tubes now.

I know of two instances like this. One person used earmite medicine instead of eyedrops. (Painful but no lasting damage) and the second used superglue instead of eyedrops. (eyedrops of different medicines come in different kinds of packaging.)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Mayor Maynot on November 07, 2011, 03:17:04 AM
This one is my Dad's..

I was around 6 years old when this happened.  My parents wanted to watch one of the Star Wars movies so we were getting all settled in with popcorn and pajamas to watch.  My dad went to put the oil in the cast iron pot to pop the popcorn and decided he had to time to go shave while he waited on the oil to heat up.  He was humming to himself when he noticed the orange glow from the corner of his eye.  The oil had gone beyond hot and caught fire.  He ran into the kitchen and not knowing what else to do, grabbed the pot and slung it to the floor... cue the fire spreading to the linoleum.  My mom had 3 Tupperware containers on the counter at the time.  The small one held sugar, the medium one held flour and the large one held....Cheerios (my dad's favorite cereal)  He grabbed what he thought was the flour to drown the flames but grabbed the Cheerios instead.  Wheat is flammable...
Mom had us kids in the yard and was shouting instructions to my dad through the kitchen window and he finally got the fire out.  -- a month later, my mom had that new kitchen she had been wanting...  :P :o
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Nora on November 07, 2011, 03:38:49 AM
That is an awesome story! Trying to put out a fire with cheerios...not so great.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Harriet Jones on November 07, 2011, 06:06:22 AM
This one is my Dad's..

I was around 6 years old when this happened.  My parents wanted to watch one of the Star Wars movies so we were getting all settled in with popcorn and pajamas to watch.  My dad went to put the oil in the cast iron pot to pop the popcorn and decided he had to time to go shave while he waited on the oil to heat up.  He was humming to himself when he noticed the orange glow from the corner of his eye.  The oil had gone beyond hot and caught fire.  He ran into the kitchen and not knowing what else to do, grabbed the pot and slung it to the floor... cue the fire spreading to the linoleum.  My mom had 3 Tupperware containers on the counter at the time.  The small one held sugar, the medium one held flour and the large one held....Cheerios (my dad's favorite cereal)  He grabbed what he thought was the flour to drown the flames but grabbed the Cheerios instead.  Wheat is flammable...
Mom had us kids in the yard and was shouting instructions to my dad through the kitchen window and he finally got the fire out.  -- a month later, my mom had that new kitchen she had been wanting...  :P :o

Isn't flour flammable too?
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Luci on November 07, 2011, 07:48:05 AM
That would have been even worse,  more like an explosion with it powdery.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Firecat on November 07, 2011, 02:41:55 PM
This one is my Dad's..

I was around 6 years old when this happened.  My parents wanted to watch one of the Star Wars movies so we were getting all settled in with popcorn and pajamas to watch.  My dad went to put the oil in the cast iron pot to pop the popcorn and decided he had to time to go shave while he waited on the oil to heat up.  He was humming to himself when he noticed the orange glow from the corner of his eye.  The oil had gone beyond hot and caught fire.  He ran into the kitchen and not knowing what else to do, grabbed the pot and slung it to the floor... cue the fire spreading to the linoleum.  My mom had 3 Tupperware containers on the counter at the time.  The small one held sugar, the medium one held flour and the large one held....Cheerios (my dad's favorite cereal)  He grabbed what he thought was the flour to drown the flames but grabbed the Cheerios instead.  Wheat is flammable...
Mom had us kids in the yard and was shouting instructions to my dad through the kitchen window and he finally got the fire out.  -- a month later, my mom had that new kitchen she had been wanting...  :P :o

Isn't flour flammable too?

Flour dust is so flammable it's basically explosive. There's a semi-famous disaster in my area where one of the old flour mills blew up, and a number of workers were killed or injured. http://www.mnhs.org/library/tips/history_topics/73washburn.html (http://www.mnhs.org/library/tips/history_topics/73washburn.html)

Salt or baking soda will work well for putting out a kitchen fire.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Harriet Jones on November 07, 2011, 03:27:52 PM
That was what I was thinking.  It's probably *better* that he grabbed the Cheerios than the flour!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: bansidhe on November 07, 2011, 03:45:42 PM
I superglued my lips together thinking it was lip balm. That is now why I only use lip balm in lipstick tubes now.

 :o   That sounds awful (but I'm still laughing - sorry).

I haven't done that, but after several unfortunate incidents, I started keeping the Lysol and the hairspray in separate cabinets.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Black Delphinium on November 07, 2011, 05:29:54 PM
I superglued my lips together thinking it was lip balm. That is now why I only use lip balm in lipstick tubes now.

 :o   That sounds awful (but I'm still laughing - sorry).

I haven't done that, but after several unfortunate incidents, I started keeping the Lysol and the hairspray in separate cabinets.
Mmmmm, lemon-y fresh.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: bansidhe on November 07, 2011, 11:51:53 PM
This is something my husband did.

When he was in his early college years, one of his favorite things to eat were those Pillsbury cinnamon rolls that come in a tube. These things: http://www.babylovingmama.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/Pillsbury-Cinnamon-Rolls.jpg (http://www.babylovingmama.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/Pillsbury-Cinnamon-Rolls.jpg).

He could eat a whole tube of them at a sitting and ate them on a regular basis for a couple of years.

Then one day, while bored, he actually read the text on the outside of the tube before opening it and was surprised to discover that you're supposed to bake them before you eat them.  :-X

Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: iradney on November 08, 2011, 01:44:08 AM
Why you shouldn't shower when you're tired:

I washed my face with menthol shampoo. My skin was VERY awake after that.

I used body wash as shampoo.

Shaved the same armpit twice, and forgot to do the other one.

These all happened on 3 seperate occasions.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Nora on November 08, 2011, 02:48:12 AM
Why you shouldn't shower when you're tired:

I washed my face with menthol shampoo. My skin was VERY awake after that.

I used body wash as shampoo.

Shaved the same armpit twice, and forgot to do the other one.

These all happened on 3 seperate occasions.

Sister!  :-[  ;D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Harriet Jones on November 08, 2011, 05:54:45 AM
This is something my husband did.

When he was in his early college years, one of his favorite things to eat were those Pillsbury cinnamon rolls that come in a tube. These things: http://www.babylovingmama.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/Pillsbury-Cinnamon-Rolls.jpg (http://www.babylovingmama.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/Pillsbury-Cinnamon-Rolls.jpg).

He could eat a whole tube of them at a sitting and ate them on a regular basis for a couple of years.

Then one day, while bored, he actually read the text on the outside of the tube before opening it and was surprised to discover that you're supposed to bake them before you eat them.  :-X

I like the taste of the raw dough, but I don't think I could eat a whole tube.  :P
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: General Jinjur on November 08, 2011, 09:59:16 AM
This morning I made myself a cappuccino and then promptly dumped it down the sink. Luckily I caught myself before much went down, but still. I guess I need a cup of coffee before I can handle my first cup of coffee.

This is something my husband did.

When he was in his early college years, one of his favorite things to eat were those Pillsbury cinnamon rolls that come in a tube. These things: http://www.babylovingmama.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/Pillsbury-Cinnamon-Rolls.jpg (http://www.babylovingmama.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/Pillsbury-Cinnamon-Rolls.jpg).

He could eat a whole tube of them at a sitting and ate them on a regular basis for a couple of years.

Then one day, while bored, he actually read the text on the outside of the tube before opening it and was surprised to discover that you're supposed to bake them before you eat them.  :-X

I love raw dough. I could probably do the same thing.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: 2littlemonkeys on November 08, 2011, 10:41:20 AM

I love raw dough. I could probably do the same thing.

Me too!  In fact, whenever I make sweet dough, biscuits or pie crust, I try my very hardest to save a little for myself.

Though I'm not sure I could eat a whole can in one sitting. 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: General Jinjur on November 08, 2011, 11:02:10 AM
At least, not without experiencing intense regret.

Bansidhe, does your DH still eat raw dough, or was he just an accidental dough nibbler?
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Irishkitty on November 08, 2011, 11:08:51 AM
More in line with the meatballs - just ate 4-day-old birthday chocolate biscuit cake. It had been sitting, uncovered, in the fridge.

Hmm... Not feeling so well now...

:(
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Betelnut on November 08, 2011, 11:19:17 AM
More in line with the meatballs - just ate 4-day-old birthday chocolate biscuit cake. It had been sitting, uncovered, in the fridge.

Hmm... Not feeling so well now...

:(

I don't think a cake would go off after only 4 days would it, especially if it was in the fridge?
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Irishkitty on November 08, 2011, 11:23:34 AM
It had nuts, biscuit, marshmallow in it. I dunno. Maybe it was just too rich for me. I'm hoping that's all!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: General Jinjur on November 08, 2011, 11:25:30 AM
All of that stuff is loaded with preservatives and will probably last until you have to chisel it out of the pan. Most likely it was just too heavy.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: bansidhe on November 08, 2011, 11:35:00 AM
Bansidhe, does your DH still eat raw dough, or was he just an accidental dough nibbler?

He seriously had no clue they were supposed to be baked.

I love raw dough, too. Not whole tubes of it on a weekly basis for a couple of years, however. I'm surprised his digestive tract didn't rebel violently.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: EmmaJ. on November 08, 2011, 12:06:31 PM
Bansidhe, does your DH still eat raw dough, or was he just an accidental dough nibbler?

He seriously had no clue they were supposed to be baked.

I love raw dough, too. Not whole tubes of it on a weekly basis for a couple of years, however. I'm surprised his digestive tract didn't rebel violently.

So what is his preference?  Raw or baked?  I'm giggling over the whole scenario - him opening the tube, putting the dough on a plate, carefully spreading the icing..... 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: GreenEyedHawk on November 08, 2011, 07:05:20 PM
Why you shouldn't shower when you're tired:

I washed my face with menthol shampoo. My skin was VERY awake after that.

I used body wash as shampoo.

Shaved the same armpit twice, and forgot to do the other one.

These all happened on 3 seperate occasions.

Sister!  :-[  ;D

Me too.  I totally space-cased in the shower once and scratched an itchy eyebrow with what I happened to be holding in my hand at the time.

A razor.

It took me awhile to decide whether I should shave my other eyebrow wonky to match, shave them both completely off and redraw them with makeup if I had to, or just leave it be to grow back in normally and let my friends laugh at me.  In the end I decided to just leave well enough alone and let it grow back in normally on its own.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Pinky830 on November 08, 2011, 07:09:11 PM
Whoa! I'm all about raw cookie dough, but raw YEAST dough could get you in serious trouble. :-X
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: VorFemme on November 08, 2011, 07:09:28 PM
VorGuy grew up getting a taste of cake batter, icing, and cookie dough when his mother or grandmothers baked.  A scraping of what was left in the mixing bowl after the rest was baking in the oven, it was common in the 1950s, 1960s, and even 1970s - until public awareness about salmonella in raw eggs became a concern.

The first thing he did when he moved out on his own was make a bowl of cake batter (mix) and eat the whole thing.  Then he got frosting (mix or can, I do not remember) and ate that whole bowl, too.

He enjoyed doing it - until the stomache ache set in about the time he finished the bowl of frosting...........apparently that ONE time did fulfill his childhood fantasies, because ever since he's been satisfied with the scrapings of the mixing bowl (although he has suggested that I leave an extra spoonful in the bowl........).

I think the stomach ache convinced him that there was a reason that you didn't eat the whole cake, frosting & all, by yourself - whether it had been baked or not..............
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: bansidhe on November 08, 2011, 10:53:07 PM
So what is his preference?  Raw or baked?  I'm giggling over the whole scenario - him opening the tube, putting the dough on a plate, carefully spreading the icing.....

I had a suspicion, which I've now confirmed with my husband. The conversation went like this:

Me: When you used to eat raw cinnamon buns, did you put them on a plate?
Him: No! [looking at me like I'm insane for asking]

He ate them right out of the tube.  :D

Nowadays he does prefer them baked, at least.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: WestAussieGirl on November 10, 2011, 04:52:00 AM
Whoa! I'm all about raw cookie dough, but raw YEAST dough could get you in serious trouble. :-X

Why?  My kids eat the bread dough all the time! Am I poisoning them?? Eek!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: exitzero on November 10, 2011, 06:10:01 AM
Many years ago I had a cat. If I called him, he would always come running.

One night I called him, nothing. I went outside to look for him, and there he was up against the house, kind of hidden in the shadows. He had a new little friend with him.

I was talking baby talk to him, telling him how nice it was that he had a new friend, when somewhere in the back of my mind a voice said, "I don't think his new cat friend should have a white stripe down his back".

The brain figured out long before the body did that this new friend was not a cat. I couldn't move fast enough to avoid both of us getting full on sprayed by a skunk.

Neither of us was very happy.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: mechtilde on November 10, 2011, 06:11:56 AM
I'm just about to have warmed up meatballs for lunch...
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Xallanthia on November 10, 2011, 09:43:48 AM
exitzero, I'm having visions of Pepe le Pew...
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: supernova on November 10, 2011, 11:13:21 AM
exitzero, I'm having visions of Pepe le Pew...

Lol!  Me too!  I actually "heard" the last bit of that post in a French accent.

"Oh, ze Mademoiselle, she is playing ze hard to get!"   ;D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jedikaiti on November 10, 2011, 01:56:48 PM
I have set my oven on fire a few times doing this.  Once I had a store bought plastic tub of cookies in the oven and went to bake a pizza.  The plastic melted and some of the melty bits flamed in the bottom of the oven.

I've also accidentally set a piece of paper on a hot burner and lit my stove on fire.  I've turned on the wrong burner and set and burned up a box of pasta too.

I set my kitchen on fire frighteningly often.  I keep a huge thing of salt by my stove for putting out fires now.

I once made a tray of brownies in a glass pan. I've done it a million times, no problem. They bake just fine, and I put the pan on the stove to cool.

I have no idea HOW I managed this, but apparently I bumped a knob and turned the burner on.

Roomie & I are hanging out in the living room, and suddenly BOOOM! The brownies exploded. Broken glass (mostly in nice big pieces, thank goodness) and brownie bits everywhere, and flaming brownies on the burner.

That was the day I learned the fire extinguishers make a BIG MESS. I was cleaning that up for a week, and finding bits I'd missed for far longer.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: parrot_girl on November 12, 2011, 08:55:15 PM
I can add another one. I decided to sterilise Baby Budgie's dummies (pacifiers, for North American ehellions) by boiling them on the stovetop. No dramas, I thought, I'll just put them on to boil and set the timer for 5 minutes and go and change the Budgie's nappy in the meantime.
I can't hear the timer from the Budgie's room
and I forgot about the dummies
and by the time I remembered, and went sprinting back to the kitchen, the saucepan had boiled dry and the outside part of the dummies had melted and was starting to char, and acrid white smoke had filled the kitchen. One ruined saucepan and two ruined dummies! Not to mention having every single window and door open as well as every fan I could find going.
The amusing part was that the silicon teats hadn't melted at all, so what was in the saucepan was a puddle of white, slightly burned on one side, with two teats poking up out of it. It looked like slightly obscene fried egg. :)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: kareng57 on November 12, 2011, 08:57:02 PM
I can add another one. I decided to sterilise Baby Budgie's dummies (pacifiers, for North American ehellions) by boiling them on the stovetop. No dramas, I thought, I'll just put them on to boil and set the timer for 5 minutes and go and change the Budgie's nappy in the meantime.
I can't hear the timer from the Budgie's room
and I forgot about the dummies
and by the time I remembered, and went sprinting back to the kitchen, the saucepan had boiled dry and the outside part of the dummies had melted and was starting to char, and acrid white smoke had filled the kitchen. One ruined saucepan and two ruined dummies! Not to mention having every single window and door open as well as every fan I could find going.
The amusing part was that the silicon teats hadn't melted at all, so what was in the saucepan was a puddle of white, slightly burned on one side, with two teats poking up out of it. It looked like slightly obscene fried egg. :)


I know that you probably didn't take pictures, but if you had it would have been interesting!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Fleur-de-Lis on November 12, 2011, 09:10:31 PM
I can add another one. I decided to sterilise Baby Budgie's dummies (pacifiers, for North American ehellions) by boiling them on the stovetop. No dramas, I thought, I'll just put them on to boil and set the timer for 5 minutes and go and change the Budgie's nappy in the meantime.
I can't hear the timer from the Budgie's room
and I forgot about the dummies
and by the time I remembered, and went sprinting back to the kitchen, the saucepan had boiled dry and the outside part of the dummies had melted and was starting to char, and acrid white smoke had filled the kitchen. One ruined saucepan and two ruined dummies! Not to mention having every single window and door open as well as every fan I could find going.
The amusing part was that the silicon teats hadn't melted at all, so what was in the saucepan was a puddle of white, slightly burned on one side, with two teats poking up out of it. It looked like slightly obscene fried egg. :)

OH!!!  I'm so glad that was the only damage.  A friend of mine had a small kitchen fire because she left the kettle on.  I am not fully conversant with the details, but apparently the kettle boiled dry and the heating element just kept going until the pan the water was in (a very low quality aluminum) melted.  I think something plastic - the handle maybe - touch the heating coil and melted to it while part of it burned. 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Sirius on November 12, 2011, 10:38:23 PM
I know all this talk about mandolins has to do with the mandolin slicers, but I keep picturing the mandolin string instrument and trying to play one in Kevlar gloves.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Irishkitty on November 14, 2011, 04:37:37 AM
I don't know how I did this but...

I hit myself in the head with my hairdryer.

How? It's a long/large hairdryer and I have short arms.

It's actually amazing that I've never done this before in the 2.5 years I've owned it (unless I'm shrinking!)

It hurt, I now have a very tender spot on my forehead  :( Luckily no visible bruising.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Mal on November 14, 2011, 04:46:31 AM
I don't know how I did this but...

I hit myself in the head with my hairdryer.

Don't worry, I've done this countless times, and my hairdryer is very very small. Okay, then again, I am a clutz...
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Nora on November 14, 2011, 10:28:48 AM
I don't know how I did this but...

I hit myself in the head with my hairdryer.

Don't worry, I've done this countless times, and my hairdryer is very very small. Okay, then again, I am a clutz...

Totally BTDT. Burned the t-shirt.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Reader on November 14, 2011, 11:00:42 AM
Misjudging the amount of space you have to back up in when you park on the street.  Did that this morning and backed into my renter's truck.  No damage at all to my renter's tuck at all, but I now have a small hole in my back bumper from a tow hook he had on the front.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Kaesha on November 14, 2011, 12:15:41 PM
I've got 2, and they both take place at my parents' house In The Middle of Nowhere.

My parents were out of the state and needed me to get some of my brother's belongings that were being stored in their garage.  They made a copy of the key and sent it to me in the mail.  So I drove for 4 hours, and when I get there, the key doesn't work (for the house or the garage).  I tried everything I could think of to get in, but alas.  I got the idea to check with the neighbors, maybe they had a spare key?  I drove the 1/2 mile to the closest neighbors and nope, they don't have a key, but the two men, father (around 80) and son (around 40 or so) came back to the house to see if they could find a way to get me in.  There was no way in Hades that I would drive that far and not finish my errand. 

Well, there was an air vent in the wall of the garage WAYYYY up (about 15 or so) feet off the ground.  I drove my jeepsky right up the wall and wormed by way in through this tiny vent.  The men were watching me, and they couldn't believe I had done that.  I did end up getting my brother's stuff, and the old man talked about it until the day he died.   8)

The second one was the other weekend, my stepdad was grilling some salmon and ran out of propane for the barbecue, so the fish would have to cook the rest of the way in the oven.  He went out on the patio to get the fish (without a hotpad  ::) ) and walked back in the house with the pan of fish saying, "hot! hot! hot!  Get the door!"  I got up and closed the sliding glass door, and he said, "not that door, the oven door!  hot! hot! hot!"

Later, I had to run out to the garage to grab something from the car and my stepdad reminded me to turn the outside light on, but I cracked up and said that I would go out and say, "dark! dark! dark!"   ;D >:D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: bansidhe on November 14, 2011, 12:59:20 PM
I don't know how I did this but...

I hit myself in the head with my hairdryer.

How? It's a long/large hairdryer and I have short arms.

It's actually amazing that I've never done this before in the 2.5 years I've owned it (unless I'm shrinking!)

It hurt, I now have a very tender spot on my forehead  :( Luckily no visible bruising.

Don't feel bad. I once was curling my bangs with a curling iron and dropped the stupid thing in my eye. I'm still not sure how it happened, but it happened fast enough that I didn't have time to blink and thus burned my eyeball.

A visit to the hospital ensued, but there was no permanent damage. I had to wear an eye patch for several days but as this was long before pirates were popular, I just just looked like a ninny.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Wonderflonium on November 14, 2011, 01:05:05 PM
Don't feel bad. I once was curling my bangs with a curling iron and dropped the stupid thing in my eye. I'm still not sure how it happened, but it happened fast enough that I didn't have time to blink and thus burned my eyeball.

A visit to the hospital ensued, but there was no permanent damage. I had to wear an eye patch for several days but as this was long before pirates were popular, I just just looked like a ninny.

Do you have a scar? I got a cigarette in my eye when I was a kid. (I was at a party at someone's house, trying to get into the living room, when a woman took her cigarette out of her mouth and held it behind her while she went up on her toes to kiss her husband [yes, at the entry of the living room; so unnecessary]. When she came back down, she backed up and put the cigarette right in my eye.) I also had an eye patch and after that sunglasses. I have a little brown scar on my eye to this day.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Julia Mercer on November 14, 2011, 01:12:01 PM
I tripped on a curb and broke a small bone in my foot once, ended up I was within hobbling distance to emergency room, so I hobbled over there, and got checked out, ended up having to wear a cast, NOT FUN! Still don't know HOW I tripped, let alone broke the bone (right around my baby toe), but I did. I also dropped my end of a solid wood headboard on my big toe when I was a teenager, broke the toe and lost the toenail, so I have a funky toenail now, lol!

Jules
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: LadyClaire on November 14, 2011, 01:35:31 PM
Not me, but DH. The post about getting into the garage via air vent reminded me of this.

We used to live in a place that relied on wood burning stoves for heat in winter. The house had a hatch in the front that you could load firewood into from outside the house, and it dropped into a basket in the kitchen.

One day, DH was chopping some firewood and loading it into the hatch. He realized a short while later that he had, in fact, locked himself out of the house, and no one else was home. The windows were all locked, so he got an idea. He would wriggle into the house through the wood hatch. DH is not a small man. The wood hatch is a fair bit narrower than DH's waist is. He got his head, shoulders, and most of his torso through the hatch when he became firmly lodged half in and half out of it. His rear end and legs were sticking out of the front of the house, and his head, arms, and shoulders were in the kitchen. He wriggled and scrambled around but nothing helped..he was STUCK stuck, good and tight.

At long last after much thrashing and wriggling he did manage to free himself, but not before ripping up his jacket and his pants in the process.

He was very careful about not locking himself out after that.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Pinky830 on November 14, 2011, 04:51:22 PM
When I was first married, I decided to learn to cook like a proper wife. I pretty much lived on spaghetti and Lean Cuisine when I was single. The hardest thing for me to learn was getting it all done at the same time. I was really bad about forgetting dinner rolls in the oven, and night after night I would yank their blackened remains out.

Well, one night I remembered them in time, and I happily set them down ON THE STOVE while I was getting stuff onto the table. It was an electric stove, and yep, I had left a burner on. I came back in to find the pan turning black and the rolls starting to smoke.

I was so disgusted I grabbed the pan and set the whole thing out on the apartment balcony. By the time DH came home, I'd actually forgotten about it, so I didn't mention it. When he saw the pan out on the balcony, he said, "So, what god did you make a burnt offering to this time?"
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: bansidhe on November 14, 2011, 05:19:42 PM
Do you have a scar? I got a cigarette in my eye when I was a kid. (I was at a party at someone's house, trying to get into the living room, when a woman took her cigarette out of her mouth and held it behind her while she went up on her toes to kiss her husband [yes, at the entry of the living room; so unnecessary]. When she came back down, she backed up and put the cigarette right in my eye.) I also had an eye patch and after that sunglasses. I have a little brown scar on my eye to this day.

No scar on that eye, luckily, but there's a small one on the other eye from another, earlier incident (not involving a curling iron).

I wonder how much self-restraint it took your parents not to do violence to the woman with the cigarette. They must have used up a lifetime supply.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: siamesecat2965 on November 14, 2011, 05:40:34 PM
I did this many moons ago.  I was living at home, and had an ancient Volvo station wagon.  Well, I had a habit of sticking stuff in the ashtray, which the gearshift was right in front of when in park, essentially blocking it, so you had to put the car in drive to open the ashtray.

So one day I lost something, and went out to see if I had stuck it there.  So I get in, put the car in drive, look and apparently got out and went back in the house.  Next thing I know I get a call from my neighbor across the street; was everything ok with my car?   i said yes, and why?  well, i hadn't put it back in park, so it rolled slowly down the driveway, across the street backwards, and the back wheels were on the curb of the neighbors house!  OOPS.  I was quite embarassed and had to go retrieve my car!  Thankfully it wasn't hit and didn't hit anyone other car in its little trip!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Wonderflonium on November 14, 2011, 06:22:50 PM
I wonder how much self-restraint it took your parents not to do violence to the woman with the cigarette. They must have used up a lifetime supply.

My mom was probably too busy panicking while trying to keep me from doing so. Luckily, my dad wasn't there; I really, REALLY don't think that would have gone well, and I wouldn't have wanted my daddy in jail. I can't imagine how the phone call went when mom called him from the hospital.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: turtleIScream on November 14, 2011, 07:30:46 PM
Speaking of eye injuries...

I was out shopping, and decided to try on sunglasses. I wasn't having much luck finding a pair that fit and looked good on my face. I was about to give up, when I spotted a nice looking pair that had been mistakenly placed on the children's rack. In my excitement to try them on, I forgot to move the tag that was attached to the nose bridge. Yep, it tore into my eye, which immediately started bleeding. I felt so stupid describing the incident to the doctor at the urgent care clinic.

And, yes, I bought those sunglasses.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Pinky830 on November 14, 2011, 07:53:22 PM
I did this many moons ago.  I was living at home, and had an ancient Volvo station wagon.  Well, I had a habit of sticking stuff in the ashtray, which the gearshift was right in front of when in park, essentially blocking it, so you had to put the car in drive to open the ashtray.

So one day I lost something, and went out to see if I had stuck it there.  So I get in, put the car in drive, look and apparently got out and went back in the house.  Next thing I know I get a call from my neighbor across the street; was everything ok with my car?   i said yes, and why?  well, i hadn't put it back in park, so it rolled slowly down the driveway, across the street backwards, and the back wheels were on the curb of the neighbors house!  OOPS.  I was quite embarassed and had to go retrieve my car!  Thankfully it wasn't hit and didn't hit anyone other car in its little trip!

I did something similar once, and the fun part is that this was at my old house, where I lived at the top of a steep hill. The car rolled down the driveway, across the street and into the ditch in the neighbors' front yard. Caused quite a stir. Thank goodness it didn't hit anyone. I had to get a tow truck to get it out. It had a couple of medium-sized dents, and due to the stage of life that car was in at the time, I just never got them fixed.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: southern girl on November 14, 2011, 09:15:43 PM
I have a couple, but neither are mine.

A friend of mine's car popped out of gear, rolled backwards down his (steep) driveway and gave the neighbors across the street a brand new "window" in the front of their house.

Years ago, one of my cousins and a friend of hers were riding on the beach in an MG Midget.  Her friend decided to drive between two palm trees.  My cousin thought, "Oh no, we're not gonna make it!" and put her hand out to grab the tree and stop the car.  Nice broken bone and a great story to tell.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: GreenEyedHawk on November 15, 2011, 01:43:23 PM
I have a cigarette burn story too.

I was at my aunt's 40th birthday party.  Now, 40th birthdays are a big deal in our family for some reason and the parties are always pretty big.  My aunt's happens to be in the summertime so they'd rented a hot tub and everyone was drinking and fooling around in the hot tub and just in general being silly drunks.  I was in my late teens at the time.  I was sitting in the hot tub beside my dad, who was still a smoker at that time. (he's since quit, I'm so proud of him!) He had his hands hanging over the side of the tub behind him, so I went to do the same thing, not realising he had a cigarette in his hand at the time and putting the palm of my hand right against the ember. 

Then just to add insult to injury, my first reflexive move was to plunge my burnt hand into the water...the hot hot tub water.  Didn't help, as you might imagine.  I spent the rest of the night periodically taking chunks of ice from the beer cooler and just keeping them clenched in my hand.  Still have a little divot there too, in the palm of my hand between my index and middle fingers.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: 2littlemonkeys on November 15, 2011, 03:48:26 PM
I was trying to change the channel on the TV last night.  Our satellite box is being uncooperative lately and is refusing to talk to the remote.*  So, of course, the only way to fix this is to shake the remote vigorously.   ::)

It didn't help with the communication issue.  I did manage to crack myself in the forehead though.  (double  ::))

*We know it's the box and not the remote because of our scientific experiments.  We tried the remote on the other boxes we own and they work fine.  But none of the other remotes work on this particular box. 

When I was in HS, we had a small pleasure farm and my chores included making sure the horses had clean water every day.  We'd bring the hose over the fence and fill it.  Usually, we'd turn the power off (thus de-electrifying the fences).  On this day, my dad started filling the trough but didn't get a chance to turn the fence off because he was busy with something else.  He said, "2LM, that fence is hot.  Turn the power off before you take out the hose."  I said, "Okay!" and promptly noticed the trough was full.  So I grabbed the hose to take it out of the trough.  *facepalm*  I didn't get hurt or anything but it sure isn't a nice feeling.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Xallanthia on November 17, 2011, 03:07:24 PM
Today my husband, who has been out of work for a long time, has a phone interview, and I went home for a late lunch to give him a bit of encouragement.  I took my shoes off when I walked in the door.

After we talked for a bit and I worked to calm him down, he asked if I would run and grab him some fast food quickly, as he hadn't eaten yet and was hungry.  I said sure and, since I was in a hurry, threw on my black rubber-soled slippers (fabric inside and upper, obviously not a real shoe), since I was only going through the drive-thru.  When I got back, I gave him the food, chatted with him for about 5 minutes while I ate my own food, kissed him, and got out of his way.

As I walked back into my office I realized: I'm still wearing my slippers.  I'll just be hiding my feet under the desk for the rest of the day....
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: thunderroad on November 17, 2011, 03:43:15 PM
I did this many moons ago.  I was living at home, and had an ancient Volvo station wagon.  Well, I had a habit of sticking stuff in the ashtray, which the gearshift was right in front of when in park, essentially blocking it, so you had to put the car in drive to open the ashtray.

So one day I lost something, and went out to see if I had stuck it there.  So I get in, put the car in drive, look and apparently got out and went back in the house.  Next thing I know I get a call from my neighbor across the street; was everything ok with my car?   i said yes, and why?  well, i hadn't put it back in park, so it rolled slowly down the driveway, across the street backwards, and the back wheels were on the curb of the neighbors house!  OOPS.  I was quite embarassed and had to go retrieve my car!  Thankfully it wasn't hit and didn't hit anyone other car in its little trip!

I did something similar once, and the fun part is that this was at my old house, where I lived at the top of a steep hill. The car rolled down the driveway, across the street and into the ditch in the neighbors' front yard. Caused quite a stir. Thank goodness it didn't hit anyone. I had to get a tow truck to get it out. It had a couple of medium-sized dents, and due to the stage of life that car was in at the time, I just never got them fixed.

When I first started driving a stick-shift car, I did not realize that it was best to leave the car parked in gear, with the emergency brake on.  So I put it in neutral, put on the emergency brake, and went into the office. 

Later that afternoon I was looking out the window of my colleague's office, and said, where's my car????? It had rolled forward and was resting against the curb close to the building, luckily not having hit any other cars. 

I told myself it was lonely for me. 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: TinyVulgarUnicorn on November 17, 2011, 03:50:12 PM
My husband and I were cleaning the cat litter box and I was having trouble separating the clumps off the side of the litter box so I decided it would be a good idea to let go of the cat box and let it hit the ground so that it would dislodge the clumps.  The cat box broke in half.    ::)



Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Wonderflonium on November 17, 2011, 04:36:00 PM
Today my husband, who has been out of work for a long time, has a phone interview, and I went home for a late lunch to give him a bit of encouragement.  I took my shoes off when I walked in the door.

After we talked for a bit and I worked to calm him down, he asked if I would run and grab him some fast food quickly, as he hadn't eaten yet and was hungry.  I said sure and, since I was in a hurry, threw on my black rubber-soled slippers (fabric inside and upper, obviously not a real shoe), since I was only going through the drive-thru.  When I got back, I gave him the food, chatted with him for about 5 minutes while I ate my own food, kissed him, and got out of his way.

As I walked back into my office I realized: I'm still wearing my slippers.  I'll just be hiding my feet under the desk for the rest of the day....

There was a time at my old job when I was working a ridiculous amount of overtime and I was completely exhausted. Between that and the stress, I was sleeping maybe 4 hours a night. I was completely worn out. I got to work one day and realized I was wearing 2 different shoes. VERY different shoes. Both were ballet flats; one was black, the other was pale yellow with brown flowers. Yeah. It was baaaaaaaaaaaad. Luckily, we had a casual office. A friend had an extra pair of sneakers in her desk. They were a size and a half too small, but I wore them!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: alegria on November 17, 2011, 05:10:18 PM
Oh, the car stories reminded me of something incredibly stupid I did last winter.  I had to drive to work for some reason, probably the weather (I ride my motorcycle to work unless weather/road conditions are dangerous), and as I was backing the car out of the garage I realized my sunglasses were inside the truck.  So I backed up the driveway and stopped next to the truck, unlocked the truck with my keys, and dashed out to grab my sunglasses.  As I was leaning inside the truck, motion out of the corner of my eye caught my attention - the car was MOVING!!

So what did I do?  Run AROUND the truck and around the back of the (reversing and slowly speeding up car) to dive for the brakes in the (door open) drivers seat.   ::)  It didn't even occur to me that my car could've run me over and broken my leg (it did bang my shin as I rounded the back drivers corner, all I could think of was getting it stopped before it hit my neighbor's car.   The adrenaline shock wearing off was NASTY, especially since I hadn't had breakfast yet...

I think what happened is while I was fumbling for my truck key, the car was perfectly balanced on the curve of my driveway so that it wasn't moving even though it was in reverse, so my brain figured it was in park and safe to leave.  Last time I ever do that...the time or two since then I've needed to grab something out of the truck, I've parked and turned off the car!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Julia Mercer on November 17, 2011, 05:31:46 PM
Today my husband, who has been out of work for a long time, has a phone interview, and I went home for a late lunch to give him a bit of encouragement.  I took my shoes off when I walked in the door.

After we talked for a bit and I worked to calm him down, he asked if I would run and grab him some fast food quickly, as he hadn't eaten yet and was hungry.  I said sure and, since I was in a hurry, threw on my black rubber-soled slippers (fabric inside and upper, obviously not a real shoe), since I was only going through the drive-thru.  When I got back, I gave him the food, chatted with him for about 5 minutes while I ate my own food, kissed him, and got out of his way.

As I walked back into my office I realized: I'm still wearing my slippers.  I'll just be hiding my feet under the desk for the rest of the day....

There was a time at my old job when I was working a ridiculous amount of overtime and I was completely exhausted. Between that and the stress, I was sleeping maybe 4 hours a night. I was completely worn out. I got to work one day and realized I was wearing 2 different shoes. VERY different shoes. Both were ballet flats; one was black, the other was pale yellow with brown flowers. Yeah. It was baaaaaaaaaaaad. Luckily, we had a casual office. A friend had an extra pair of sneakers in her desk. They were a size and a half too small, but I wore them!

LOL, TWICE, that nearly happened to me, the first time, I was working at KFC, and got ready for work, and headed out the door, halfway out the door I realize, I'm not wearing my work shoes, lol, so I ran back in and changed shoes, lol, same thing a couple months later, walking down the hall to the elevator when I realize I'm wearing my slippers, LOL! OOPS!

Jules
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Xallanthia on November 17, 2011, 05:35:45 PM
I think what happened is while I was fumbling for my truck key, the car was perfectly balanced on the curve of my driveway so that it wasn't moving even though it was in reverse, so my brain figured it was in park and safe to leave.  Last time I ever do that...the time or two since then I've needed to grab something out of the truck, I've parked and turned off the car!

Oh!  You reminded me of when I did the same thing once...  it was the fall after I graduated college and one of my best friends was coming for a visit.  When I picked him up at the airport I was in such a hurry to give him a hug that I forgot to put the car in park.  Fortunately my friend is 6'4" and just stepped into my car onto the break.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: *new*mommyagain36 on November 18, 2011, 10:22:21 AM
My ex-MIL was actually a decent cook but gravy was not her forte.  One evening she made a big bowl of gravy and as we sat down to eat a fly flew over it and dropped dead right in the bowl! Literally it was flying along, healthy and fine, and then just as it flew over the gravy it dropped dead.  We laughed until we cried.  She had a good sense of humor about it and laughed too.  it was a running joke for years.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: 2littlemonkeys on November 18, 2011, 10:38:10 AM
Today my husband, who has been out of work for a long time, has a phone interview, and I went home for a late lunch to give him a bit of encouragement.  I took my shoes off when I walked in the door.

After we talked for a bit and I worked to calm him down, he asked if I would run and grab him some fast food quickly, as he hadn't eaten yet and was hungry.  I said sure and, since I was in a hurry, threw on my black rubber-soled slippers (fabric inside and upper, obviously not a real shoe), since I was only going through the drive-thru.  When I got back, I gave him the food, chatted with him for about 5 minutes while I ate my own food, kissed him, and got out of his way.

As I walked back into my office I realized: I'm still wearing my slippers.  I'll just be hiding my feet under the desk for the rest of the day....

HA!  I was driving to Target one day with the-infant YDD. Half way there, I noticed my feet were REALLY hot (it was August).  I looked down and realized I never changed out of my slippers.  I can't stand having bare feet, so I was running around the house in those fuzzy moccasin type slippers and forgot to take them off.  The worst part was, I decided going home to change was too much of a hassle and went to the store anyway.  At least they were brown and no one probably noticed.  And frankly, I've seen some interesting fashion choices where I live and at worst, I was probably considered a bit eccentric by those who did notice, LOL.

And right after I went back to work after having ODD, I got half way down the block before I realized I wasn't wearing shoes.  Only these were worse, they were the mule type and bright red.  No hiding those.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: LB on November 18, 2011, 11:52:00 AM
I seem to have too many stories to contribute to this thread.

Two years ago on Thanksgiving morning, I had everything ready or just about ready as far as food goes, so I decided to take my dog for a walk.

My dog has a ticklish spot on his side, and if you tickle him there, it puts him in the mood to play or run. We were walking along and I decided it would be fun to tickle him and get him in a playful mood. I made this decision as I was walking over a particularly icy stretch of sidewalk.  ::)

I reached down, tickled him, he jumped and of course yanked his leash. I slipped and turned my ankle. I walked a couple of steps and realized I'd never be able to make it back home. Thankfully I had brought my cell phone with me. I called DH to come pick me up and sat on the curb to wait. I was rubbing my ankle and my dog sat on the sidewalk watching me. Usually he's very sympathetic if I'm hurt or sick. I can usually get some cuddles out of him if I tell him I'm not feeling well or something hurts. So as I sat there I told him, "Puppy, mama's hurt!" He gave me a look that said "Your fault." Then he heaved an exasperated sigh and looked away.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: paige =^..^= on November 18, 2011, 12:43:13 PM
My little story involves name-brand garbage bags from the 99¢ store.  They had a large display of big boxes of extra stretchy/strong bags, boxes that usually run $5 or $6 each.  We assumed they must have had some minor flaw, but figured we could use them for kitty litter scoopings, bathroom or bedroom garbage cans, things that wouldn't stress the bags too much.  We knew it was a gamble, but what the heck  :).

Later that night, just before bedtime, I scoop the box, dropping the clumps into the bag, its bottom resting on the ground.  I tie it up, pick it up, and feel the bag contents shift .... and rip out the seam along the bottom of the bag.

Did I mention wearing the peeptoe cloth slippers? 

My brain seized at that moment, unable to comprehend the clumps of wet clay between my toes or that the fragile seam was along the bottom of the bag.  Who ... ? Why ... ? But they ... Eeeewwwwwwwwwwwwww  :-X

Ended up taking a second shower that night when I really really wanted to boil my feet. 

The slippers had to be thrown out, couldn't get the ammonia smell to fade completely.  In the end, we shredded the bags to use as packing material, but now I wish I would have cut them into strips and crocheted tote bags.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: White Dragon on November 20, 2011, 09:26:02 PM
I'm currently on a business trip, watching TV in my hotel room.

It dawns on me that I hear running water - like someone *in my room* is having a shower.
Since I am alone in Mr room, this is odd, so I go check it out.

It is raining in my bathroom.
As in, water coming down from above.

Startled, I walk down to the font desk to tell them it is raining in my room.
The front desk clerk is just getting off the phone.

It seems the person in the room above me was talking in the phone and left the water running in his room.
Sigh. No harm done, but now I need fresh towels.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Diane AKA Traska on November 21, 2011, 06:50:18 AM
So it's trash day, and I, being an idiot, do the trash on the morning of trash day instead of, you know, the night before like a sensible person.

Did I mention I'm also sick?  Yeah, there's that.

Okay, so we have two cats (we used to have more, ::sigh::).  So I'm cleaning their litter trays, dumping them to put in fresh.  And I missed the bag.  Twice.  Used litter, on the floor, twice.  Did I mention that one of them is on carpet?  Yeah, used litter, on carpet.  Thank GOD that cat's litter clumps perfectly, like bricks.  I'm talking you could build a house with them.  A brick house.  A brick shhhhyeah, not going there.

I am so annoyed at myself right now.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Wonderflonium on November 21, 2011, 07:40:30 AM
So it's trash day, and I, being an idiot, do the trash on the morning of trash day instead of, you know, the night before like a sensible person.

Did I mention I'm also sick?  Yeah, there's that.

Okay, so we have two cats (we used to have more, ::sigh::).  So I'm cleaning their litter trays, dumping them to put in fresh.  And I missed the bag.  Twice.  Used litter, on the floor, twice.  Did I mention that one of them is on carpet?  Yeah, used litter, on carpet.  Thank GOD that cat's litter clumps perfectly, like bricks.  I'm talking you could build a house with them.  A brick house.  A brick shhhhyeah, not going there.

I am so annoyed at myself right now.

Out of curiosity, what litter?
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Diane AKA Traska on November 21, 2011, 12:42:47 PM
Store brand scoopable stuff.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Solanna Dryden on November 24, 2011, 07:44:29 PM
I don't know if this is stupid or just sadly impulsive, but I just bought a whole whack of Christmas cards...

...

...and I just remembered I don't really have anyone to send them to. So uh...if you want a Christmas card, feel free to let me know, lol....
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Optimoose Prime on November 24, 2011, 08:40:35 PM
Back onto food:  If the Crisco looks funny, do not make cookies with it.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: VorFemme on November 24, 2011, 08:49:15 PM
Back onto food:  If the Crisco looks funny, do not make cookies with it.

That goes double for pie crust (we ate the filling but trashed the crusts)............
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Rohanna on November 24, 2011, 08:51:13 PM
I don't know if this is stupid or just sadly impulsive, but I just bought a whole whack of Christmas cards...

...

...and I just remembered I don't really have anyone to send them to. So uh...if you want a Christmas card, feel free to let me know, lol....

You could send them to soldiers or nursing homes through some of the charity organizations and brighten someone's day :)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Sneezy on November 24, 2011, 10:02:02 PM
I don't know if this is stupid or just sadly impulsive, but I just bought a whole whack of Christmas cards...

...

...and I just remembered I don't really have anyone to send them to. So uh...if you want a Christmas card, feel free to let me know, lol....

I did that a few years ago with some funny ones I found and I don't even celebrate Christmas.  PM me if you want on my Christmas card list!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Dazi on November 25, 2011, 12:47:02 AM
Back onto food:  If the Crisco looks funny, do not make cookies with it.

That stuff can go bad?  I have never seen that happen before...it's has to have at least a 2-3 year shelf life? Right?
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: violinp on November 25, 2011, 01:38:43 AM
Back onto food:  If the Crisco looks funny, do not make cookies with it.

That stuff can go bad?  I have never seen that happen before...it's has to have at least a 2-3 year shelf life? Right?

Yup. However, stores can mess up and sell expired product, like this woman who bought a turkey that had been expired 4 years (http://www.foxnews.com/us/2011/11/24/woman-crying-fowl-over-turkey-with-2007-expiration-date/).
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Eisa on November 25, 2011, 04:03:53 AM
Let's see, I don't think I have mentioned any of these.

I was making a cup o' noodles one night. I got the water nice and hot in the microwave (thankfully not boiling temperature, however). Brought the water over to the dining room table instead of doing this over the sink (NEVER AGAIN). ....managed to pour a good dollop of very, very hot water all over my thigh. :o Ouch. Thankfully, it only left a red mark and didn't blister or anything. But...yikes!

A stove story. The other week, I wanted to make dinner for my mom. I haven't really cooked in a while. I was going to make pork chops for her, shells and cheese, and then corn for myself. I was running around like a chicken with its head cut off. I had finally decided the pork chops were done...and I set the spatula down on the stove. I thought in a safe place. My mom had been in the bathroom, came out to see if I needed anything, and discovered...I had put the spatula down where the handle shifted onto the hot burner where the corn pot was. :-/ Yes, it melted a little bit. Fortunately, however, she discovered it in time for no real damage to be done to spatula or stove. :-[

And an eye injury, although I couldn't really prevent this one at all. Was outside one Labor Day weekend, and it was windy. Something blew into my eye. Well...I couldn't get it out (or so it felt). I tried everything, even standing in the shower and trying to pour water across my eye lol. Finally, I just got my mom to take me to urgent care. Turned out I had 4 scratches on my cornea. Ow.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Dazi on November 25, 2011, 09:26:04 AM
I am telling on my DH. 

Last week I was baking a chicken.  I had an errend to run (grocery emergency), so I turned down the temp a little to slow the cooking.  I get a panicked phone call about 45 minutes later (you know how crazy grocery stores are the week before Thanksgiving ??) from DH asking me how to tell when the chicken was done.  I told him it had at least 40 minutes, not to worry.

Well he peeked at it, decided it didn't look done enough and cranked the temp up/turned on the confection.  Sweet monkey fritters!! I had it set intentionally, so that it would be done and rested when the rest of dinner was ready. 

I admit I yelled at him to turn the oven OFF and to put the chicken on the stovetop and not to touch anything until I got home and he had no business (Oh, I'm a pottymouth extraordinaire!) with my oven. 

Seriously,  the man can burn water.  He has ruined umpteen sets of pots.  He can't cook anything that isn't premade/frozen/microwaveable (i.e. frozen pizza, chicken nuggets, fish sticks, ramen noodles, hot pockets etc.) with the exception of grilling steaks. He has never cooked a whole chicken in his life. Why that day he decides he can gauge the doneness of a chicken is beyond me.

I am still flummoxed as to why he just didn't call me prior to cranking my chicken up.  He is lucky he called me when he did another 10 minutes and it probably would have been burnt to a crisp. I had to broth the pieces and whip up gravy for it...in 20 years I have never had to gravy chicken. And he had the nerve to tell me he checked the oven manual before he did and he googled it. 

He has made a solemn oath he will never change the oven settings without asking...he is forgiven, but I am still not amused.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: ShanghaiJill on November 25, 2011, 09:49:12 AM
This is a family story that comes from the 1920s.  In the USA, that was Prohibition.

To beat the ban, Grandpa made his own beer.  These days, home brewing is both legal and scientific.  Back then, it was neither. 

The final fermentation was achieved by putting a few raisins in each bottle before it was capped.  In the family home, the bottles were then put out in the back lobby to finish brewing. 

On one batch, things went horribly wrong.  The raisins were potent and the bottles started exploding.  Because the back lobby also served as a larder for the family food supply, something had to be done.

A younger son was given the task.  He was 'armored' with a saucepan on his head, a pillow strapped to his chest, heavy gloves, and towels wrapped around his arms.  His job was to open the lobby door and throw the bottles into the back yard.

My dad made beer in the early 50's.    Alas, when you took the caps off, green vapor came out.    Mom and Dad left his brother alone in the house with it.

When they returned home, he had passed out from drinking it.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Ereine on November 25, 2011, 10:13:41 AM
I just remembered an incudent in which I did very stupid things, at least twice. I was making something that started with heating oil in a pot. For some reason I thought that it was a good idea to go to another room to check my emails while it was heating and when I came back the oil had started to smoke, though fortunately there were no flames yet. I was young and stupid and bad in a crises (still am) and panicked. After taking the pot off the burner I didn't know what to do, I was afraid that it was going to burst into flames or something. And the best thing to do seemed to be to set it down. But not on any reasonable surface, like stainless steel that was next to me, no, it to be the floor. The plastic floor. If the pot wasn't ruined by the oil the melting plastic did it. It also sort of ruined the floor.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: DoubleTrouble on November 25, 2011, 11:55:47 AM
From many years ago, I had a boss who was a great person but a bit scatterbrained. One day she walked into the office & told me she needed a new pager. Why? Because she accidentally knocked her pager off of her belt, into the toilet ... & flushed the toilet! ;D Once I stopped laughing I had IT send us a new pager which was 1/3 smaller then the pager she had flushed. I always wondered if she flushed the new one after I left that job.

A few months ago I was making my boys' birthday cake, a six layer rainbow cake to be exact, with only two cake pans. Doing this the night before the party after you've spend the day at the doctor's office for their yearly appointment plus driving 4 hours round trip to see Thomas the Tank Engine in 90+ degree heat is not the best idea. I got the first two layers done & was getting ready to put the second set in the oven when I thankfully spotted an important oops. I totally forgot to grease & flour the pans which would have ruined those two layers as I'm a total klutz in getting cake out of pans plus I had only just enough eggs to make the cake & frosting & if I had sent anyone out to get more eggs there would have been a riot on my hands. SO i had to pour the batter into bowls, wash, dry, regrease & reflour the pans before putting the batter back into said pans.

Lesson learned, make the cake at least 2 nights before the party when I'm less tired, it'll be fine!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: DoubleTrouble on November 25, 2011, 12:37:44 PM
I was visiting family who lived in a high rise apartment.Bored one afternoon I decided to walk down the steps (30 floors).  Between the parking-levels and the living-levels was a fence/door.

Before I went down through it, I decided to check to see if it locked.  Because I knew I hadn't brought the key, and all the parking-level exit doors needed a key to open from the stairwell.  If the fence/door locked behind me I'd be locked in the stair case.  It did lock.  And I went through anyways.  I don't know why.  I guess maybe in the back of my head I thought I could reach through the fence to turn the door knob from the other side?  While it wasn't a concious thought, that is what I tell myself to make me feel less stupid.

I was pounding on the exit doors for a while and no one wanted to open them for me.  Was locked in the staircase for a while until someone else came in.

To this day I can't figure out why I did that. Obviously I was smart enough to check to see if it locked...
 

DH did that at work once. You had to have a key card to open the stairwell doors from inside but you could get into the stairwells without a key in case of fire. One day he had left his wallet in his office & then took the staircase down to the next floor. And couldn't open the door. Tried to go back up & couldn't get in. Pounded on the door for a while but since most people took the elevator they didn't hear him. So he had to walk down 30 flights to get outside & then convince the security guard to let him back into the building. ;D Bad wife that I am I told him at least he got some exercise!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Musicwoman on November 25, 2011, 09:53:18 PM
I tell on a boss I had a long, long time ago.

It was 1988 and I was living and working in a pub in the West Australian outback (Meekatharra, to be exact).  All the staff lived at the pub and fixed our own breakfast in the industrial kitchen.  The manager was a moron.  One morning he loaded up a cast iron pan with bacon, set the industrial gas burner on as high as it would go...and wandered off to answer the phone.

I meandered into the kitchen an unknown time later to find the pan pouring smoke, and it burst into flames before my eyes.  I flicked it into the metre-deep pan scouring sink, and covered the whole mess with the fire blanket.  The emergency was thus over - the fire was completely contained and could be safely left to burn itself out without further interference.  There wasn't even any damage done.  Sweet, right?

Until Moron Manager came back in, freaked to find the place full of smoke, and freaked worse to learn the pan was still on fire underneath the fire blanket.  He began screaming at me to turn on the taps and "put water on it!" I tartly replied that if he wanted to put water on a fat fire that was his affair, but let me get out of the room first.

Then he started screaming that the fire blanket would be damaged.  The fire blanket?  The fire blanket which is specificially designed to smother firesThat fire blanket?

He yelled I was treating him like a moron.  I yelled he was acting like a moron.  He stormed off.  By the time I had finished my breakfast the fire was out and everything was cool enough to touch.  I repacked the (slightly smoke-blackened but in no way damaged) fire blanket, washed the pan and sink, and went about my business.

The cook had a good deal to say about the damage to his pan, but the manager and I never spoke of the incident again. 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: dawnfire on November 26, 2011, 06:56:01 PM
I've taken to using canned oil in my frying in an effort to cut back on oil consuption. The first time I used it, I did my normal stuff. popped the fry pan on the heat to warm up and then i started to spray. Next thing i knew there was  big phoomp and a fireball. Stupid me forgot heat+flammable gas=fire.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: artk2002 on November 26, 2011, 08:40:13 PM
I've taken to using canned oil in my frying in an effort to cut back on oil consuption. The first time I used it, I did my normal stuff. popped the fry pan on the heat to warm up and then i started to spray. Next thing i knew there was  big phoomp and a fireball. Stupid me forgot heat+flammable gas=fire.

A friend of my ex got very offended when I freaked out at her spraying a pan while the gas was on.  I told her that I preferred to not have explosions in my kitchen.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: guihong on November 26, 2011, 11:11:04 PM
I've taken to using canned oil in my frying in an effort to cut back on oil consuption. The first time I used it, I did my normal stuff. popped the fry pan on the heat to warm up and then i started to spray. Next thing i knew there was  big phoomp and a fireball. Stupid me forgot heat+flammable gas=fire.

Is "canned oil" the same as cooking spray or Pam?  I've never heard of Pam exploding around gas (but I have electric). 

My "oops": I thought I was so smart baking a turkey breast in one of those big aluminum foil roasting pans.  First of all, it helps to turn on the oven  ::).  Second, when I went to lift the pan out of the oven, the turkey slid down to one side and the whole thing folded in half.  Fortunately, I rescued the turkey and it was in a baking bag, so juice didn't go all over the place.

Believe it or not, I also forgot to turn on the burner under the peas, and then wondered why they hadn't boiled in half an hour.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Dazi on November 27, 2011, 09:36:59 AM

My "oops": I thought I was so smart baking a turkey breast in one of those big aluminum foil roasting pans.  First of all, it helps to turn on the oven  ::).  Second, when I went to lift the pan out of the oven, the turkey slid down to one side and the whole thing folded in half.  Fortunately, I rescued the turkey and it was in a baking bag, so juice didn't go all over the place.

Believe it or not, I also forgot to turn on the burner under the peas, and then wondered why they hadn't boiled in half an hour.

I always line my aluminum pan with a layer of foil.  The one year I forgot there was a pinhole in the bottom....hmmmm, burned turkey juice all over the bottom of the oven.

PSA:  Always put a baking pan under aluminum pans and use that to pick it up with when it's done. 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: artk2002 on November 27, 2011, 11:39:11 AM
I've taken to using canned oil in my frying in an effort to cut back on oil consuption. The first time I used it, I did my normal stuff. popped the fry pan on the heat to warm up and then i started to spray. Next thing i knew there was  big phoomp and a fireball. Stupid me forgot heat+flammable gas=fire.

Is "canned oil" the same as cooking spray or Pam?  I've never heard of Pam exploding around gas (but I have electric). 

Any flammable material (and Pam is flammable) in mist form around an open flame is bad news.  That's why flour mills explode occasionally -- very fine flour dust in suspension in the air.  The military do that with gasoline -- it's called a fuel-air explosive (FAE.)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Mal on November 29, 2011, 04:26:14 AM
Reminds me of the time when I tried out a tea candle holder where two candles were placed above one another and the one on top melted and caught flame in its entirety. Guess what... burning molten wax is the same as burning oil. Can't be put out by spraying water on it. But the resulting cloud of fire will make a grown woman scream like a super hero movie damsel in distress.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: guihong on November 29, 2011, 02:21:52 PM
Did you all know that if you allow one of those frozen steamable bags of vegetables to thaw, it's best to just throw it out as a wash?  Bet you didn't know that attempting to microwave it will cause the bag to swell up like a pufferfish, eventually bursting all over the inside of the microwave.  And I'm here to tell you that rice is hard to wipe up.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: siamesecat2965 on November 29, 2011, 02:50:22 PM
I've taken to using canned oil in my frying in an effort to cut back on oil consuption. The first time I used it, I did my normal stuff. popped the fry pan on the heat to warm up and then i started to spray. Next thing i knew there was  big phoomp and a fireball. Stupid me forgot heat+flammable gas=fire.

I did something similar, but with a gas grill.  I dog and housesit for friends, who have a nice house, pool, patio, and grill.  I had friends over, and we were going to bbq.  I will add I'm afraid of the grill, so I stand to the side when I hit the ignition button. 

So I open the gas tank, and rather than turning on ONE switch, then hitting the ignite button, I turned all three on, hit ignite, and WHOOOOMP - a giant fireball flew out of the front of the grill.  But because I'm afraid of it, I stood to the side, so it missed me.  Oops.  I was too busy chatting with my friends and not paying attetnion.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: blue2000 on November 30, 2011, 07:38:49 AM
Did you all know that if you allow one of those frozen steamable bags of vegetables to thaw, it's best to just throw it out as a wash?  Bet you didn't know that attempting to microwave it will cause the bag to swell up like a pufferfish, eventually bursting all over the inside of the microwave.  And I'm here to tell you that rice is hard to wipe up.

You can open it up and microwave it on a covered plate if you want. I have done that with a few that I have bought - I never cook them in the bag.

(I confess to being highly amused at the image of a microwave pufferfish spitting rice at you. ;D )
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Redsoil on November 30, 2011, 08:01:55 AM
Stupid things I've done?  Lots!

However, one incident which comes to mind harks back to childhood.  We had just had a shiny new upright freezer installed at home, and it was plugged in to freeze up nicely prior to food being put in it.  For some reason, my mother thought it a good idea to warn me "now make sure you don't open the freezer up and stick your tongue on the bars!"  Whiskey, Tango, Foxtrot???  I'd have never even thought of it had she not explicitly and very precisely ensured by those words that this curious 7 year old would do just that! 

Of course, she freaked when I did, and got stuck fast by my tongue.  She proceeded to YANK my head back, to free me.  Several layers of tongue were left behind, quite a lot of bleeding ensued, and a trip into town to the doctor was required.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: MrTango on November 30, 2011, 08:22:25 AM
Did you all know that if you allow one of those frozen steamable bags of vegetables to thaw, it's best to just throw it out as a wash?  Bet you didn't know that attempting to microwave it will cause the bag to swell up like a pufferfish, eventually bursting all over the inside of the microwave.  And I'm here to tell you that rice is hard to wipe up.

You can open it up and microwave it on a covered plate if you want. I have done that with a few that I have bought - I never cook them in the bag.

(I confess to being highly amused at the image of a microwave pufferfish spitting rice at you. ;D )

Or you could just put the bag on a plate and poke a small vent hole in the top to keep it from exploding.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: General Jinjur on November 30, 2011, 10:39:06 AM
Right now the Nom is fascinated with turning knobs and such, but for some reason it hadn't occured to me that he'd play with the box fan - that was Stupid Thing #1. Once he switched it on, (and stuck his finger in it), I quickly reached around and unplugged the thing - and in the instant I took my eyes off him, he stuck his finger in again, much further this time, which was Stupid Thing #2. Luckily the blades had slowed enough that there was no damage....
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Bookgirl on November 30, 2011, 11:39:03 AM
My wedding day.

We're up early and out at the venue, setting things up.  I'm in jeans and tshirt, hair in curlers.  We finish setting up and I head back to our house to shower and start the getting ready process.

I take the car we rented for the wedding, leaving soon to be DH with the keys to my car. 

The keys with my house key on them.......

Yeah, I had to break into my own house on my wedding day. 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: lilfox on November 30, 2011, 02:31:17 PM
Bookgirl, you just reminded me of a few of my own.

These two things happened at the same apartment, which was one of four in a building, and our unit was mostly below ground - we had windows at ground level but the front door and sliding glass door (along the same wall) were down a half flight of steps and out of sight of the street.  Fortunately.

Stupid thing 1:  Over one summer, my roommate was gone for the week and wouldn't be returning til after the weekend.  My vacation was staggered with hers so I left the Friday of that weekend.  While packing my car, I went in and out the sliding door because it was slightly easier.  After I left, the apartment was empty for two days.  Roommate arrives home to find the sliding glass door sitting wide open.  She about had a heart attack thinking we'd been robbed, but lucky for us it was just my stupidity and no one from the street could see the open door.

Stupid thing 2:  I had moved away to take an internship but left all my stuff in the apartment and continued to pay rent.  After several months, I came back to visit for a weekend and was planning to stay at the apartment.  Once again, roommate was going to be gone for that weekend, which I knew in advance.  So I can't remember why I didn't feel it would be important to bring my key with me.  Unfortunately for me, roommate was not so scatterbrained so there were no unlocked (much less open) doors.  However, I knew I had never locked my bedroom windows...

Let me describe the bedroom windows.  They were the kind that open outward with a handcrank - these were installed so the hinges were along the top edge, so the bottom edge pushed out.  And as I mentioned, they were at ground level.  Meaning that the bottom edge pushed out over the rock garden and its row of prickly hedges that lined the back edge of the building.

So the process of entering was thus:
1) crouch down in the middle of the prickly hedges
2) pull the bottom window edge outwards inch by frustratingly slow inch
3) lie down on the rocks and scooch through the narrow opening, and oh yeah
4) kick in the screen.

It did make me feel better about never locking those windows - I doubt any break-and-enterers would bother coming in that way!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Athos_000 on November 30, 2011, 04:53:43 PM
I make these cookies that have to be fried. One year around Christmas time I was home from college and decided to make some while everyone else was at work. I am a terrible Klutz. After I got the cookies made I was trying to move the pan of hot oil over to cool and somehow jerked it too hard. The boiling hot oil spilled out over the side of the oven and down both my bare legs (I was wearing shorts, brilliant me!). This caused me to REALLY jerk the pan, so now the boiling hot oil was all over the stove and burst into flames... I grabbed for something to smother it.... should have grabbed baking soda... unfortunately I used flour. The flames shot even higher...I had horrible visions of burning down my parents house for Christmas... Finally got it smothered with a dish towel and the baking soda. In the mean time my legs have oil trails from the insides of my thighs to my ankles that ended up taking the skin off. I should never be left alone with hot oil or sharp knives lol.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: General Jinjur on November 30, 2011, 05:13:19 PM
I just want to know more about these fried cookies.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Wonderflonium on November 30, 2011, 05:14:32 PM
Me too! Fried cookies sound fascinating!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: random numbers on December 01, 2011, 12:02:16 AM
Rosettes?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rosette_%28pastry%29
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Dazi on December 01, 2011, 06:25:48 AM
Rosettes?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rosette_%28pastry%29

I haven't had those in years.  I used to really like them when I was a kid, but you don't find them where I live now.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Trogdor on December 01, 2011, 12:56:17 PM
Quote
Me too! Fried cookies sound fascinating!

Fattigmann?
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: White Dragon on December 01, 2011, 01:45:57 PM
Not sure if I told this story before.

The paper towel dispenser in our ladies restroom is "locked".
When you want to replace the paper towel, you need a special little metal tab (stick in the slot and rotate) to get the thing open.

Naturally, we lost this little tab. For several months, we made do with a paper clip.
Well, I made do because no one else seemed to have knack for jimmying open a paper towel dispenser. (Cause that's such an important skill, doncha know!  ;D )

Finally, I made a concerted search of our (industrial) building looking for a suitable replacement.
To no avail.

Unfortunately, I ended up frustrated because I could not find a thin, shaped piece of metal that would suit.

Then I went "D'oh!"

The company next door to us is a locksmith...  ::)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Seven Ate Nine on December 01, 2011, 02:55:14 PM
I've taken to using canned oil in my frying in an effort to cut back on oil consuption. The first time I used it, I did my normal stuff. popped the fry pan on the heat to warm up and then i started to spray. Next thing i knew there was  big phoomp and a fireball. Stupid me forgot heat+flammable gas=fire.

I did something similar, but with a gas grill.  I dog and housesit for friends, who have a nice house, pool, patio, and grill.  I had friends over, and we were going to bbq.  I will add I'm afraid of the grill, so I stand to the side when I hit the ignition button. 

So I open the gas tank, and rather than turning on ONE switch, then hitting the ignite button, I turned all three on, hit ignite, and WHOOOOMP - a giant fireball flew out of the front of the grill.  But because I'm afraid of it, I stood to the side, so it missed me.  Oops.  I was too busy chatting with my friends and not paying attetnion.

I blew up my grill twice.  On our old grill, the ignitor didn't work.  I would light the lighter, turn on the gas, and stick the lighter in the "ignitor hole"  I was doing this on a very cold day, and couldn't find the firestarter, so I was using a BIC lighter (which is double dumb, I know... I also used to light Bunsen burners with a BIC.  I am an idiot).  Well, I couldn't keep the lighter lit.  I repeatedly turned the gas on and off in an attempt to not have a huge amount of it flame up, but alas, that didn't work so well.  Fireball in my face.  Didn't actually cause burns to my face (I did ask DH if I was missing an eyebrow), but my skin felt warm for a few hours and I was shaking for a bit.

So this year we get a new grill.  I heated it up, then realized that new grill = new grill plates = not seasoned = everything will stick.  So I grabbed the can of PAM.  More fireball.  Thankfully it didn't really leave the grill base, so no damage done, but it freaked me out a bit.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: 2littlemonkeys on December 01, 2011, 04:52:45 PM
Stupid things I've done?  Lots!

However, one incident which comes to mind harks back to childhood.  We had just had a shiny new upright freezer installed at home, and it was plugged in to freeze up nicely prior to food being put in it.  For some reason, my mother thought it a good idea to warn me "now make sure you don't open the freezer up and stick your tongue on the bars!"  Whiskey, Tango, Foxtrot???  I'd have never even thought of it had she not explicitly and very precisely ensured by those words that this curious 7 year old would do just that! 

Of course, she freaked when I did, and got stuck fast by my tongue.  She proceeded to YANK my head back, to free me.  Several layers of tongue were left behind, quite a lot of bleeding ensued, and a trip into town to the doctor was required.

And I bet you never did that again!  I got mine stuck on my next door neighbor's screen door.  I dunno, it seemed like a good idea at the time.  ::)  Fortunately, NDN Mom just poured warm water over my tongue and I got to keep all of it. 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Outdoor Girl on December 01, 2011, 07:18:29 PM
I was making squash soup tonight.  The final step is to blend it smooth.  I used my hand blender to start and then my regular blender.  I filled the blender about half full, set it on pulse and hit 'Puree'.  It came out around the plug in the lid so I grabbed a cloth and put it over the top, holding onto the lid.  Not well enough.  When I hit 'Puree' again, hot soup sprayed out all over my chest and face.  Thank deity that I'd just taken my contacts out and put my glasses on.  I have first degree burns on my chest and face.  I'm hoping they don't turn into second degree burns.

Someone just pass me my sign, would you?

(Yes, I've been icing my chest and face but the face is still burning!)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Silversurfer on December 02, 2011, 04:05:11 AM
Oh my goodness!!!  (((((Outdoorgirl)))) that is terrible!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Dazi on December 02, 2011, 06:29:44 AM
I was making squash soup tonight.  The final step is to blend it smooth.  I used my hand blender to start and then my regular blender.  I filled the blender about half full, set it on pulse and hit 'Puree'.  It came out around the plug in the lid so I grabbed a cloth and put it over the top, holding onto the lid.  Not well enough.  When I hit 'Puree' again, hot soup sprayed out all over my chest and face.  Thank deity that I'd just taken my contacts out and put my glasses on.  I have first degree burns on my chest and face.  I'm hoping they don't turn into second degree burns.

Someone just pass me my sign, would you?

(Yes, I've been icing my chest and face but the face is still burning!)

Just some burn care FYI, you really shouldn't put ice on burns.  It is actually one of the worst things you can do.  http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/first-aid-burns/FA00022
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Outdoor Girl on December 02, 2011, 08:09:47 AM
I call it ice but it is really just a cold compress - a soft, gel ice pack wrapped in a tea towel.

I have one small patch of 2nd degree on my forehead at the hair line but the rest seems to be 1st degree, since most of the redness is already gone.

I made this same soup 2 weeks ago and this did not happen with the blender!  I don't know what was different this time - maybe it was more liquid?  Next time, let the dang soup cool before blending, stupid.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Black Delphinium on December 02, 2011, 09:42:04 AM
I call it ice but it is really just a cold compress - a soft, gel ice pack wrapped in a tea towel.

I have one small patch of 2nd degree on my forehead at the hair line but the rest seems to be 1st degree, since most of the redness is already gone.

I made this same soup 2 weeks ago and this did not happen with the blender!  I don't know what was different this time - maybe it was more liquid?  Next time, let the dang soup cool before blending, stupid.
A good stick blender is about $20 and so worth it for pureeing soups.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: LadyClaire on December 02, 2011, 10:13:17 AM
Stupid thing the vending machine company did at work.

They're remodeling the cafeteria at work, so they've removed the vending machines. The vending machine company came in to take their machines, and decided that instead of wheeling the machines down the hall and using the ramp that lets out into the parking lot (the cafeteria is in the basement level of the building), they'd take the machines up the elevator and wheel them out through the main entrance. Except they failed to measure the entryway of the small lobby that the elevator lets out into on the main floor, and as it turns out, the entryway is smaller than the vending machine. The vending machine got stuck. They ended up tearing out chunks of the drywall trying to dislodge it.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Outdoor Girl on December 02, 2011, 10:59:29 AM
A good stick blender is about $20 and so worth it for pureeing soups.

It's on my Christmas list!   :)

I have one but it just didn't do much, hence using the regular blender.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: General Jinjur on December 02, 2011, 11:04:25 AM
I was making squash soup tonight.  The final step is to blend it smooth.  I used my hand blender to start and then my regular blender.  I filled the blender about half full, set it on pulse and hit 'Puree'.  It came out around the plug in the lid so I grabbed a cloth and put it over the top, holding onto the lid.  Not well enough.  When I hit 'Puree' again, hot soup sprayed out all over my chest and face.  Thank deity that I'd just taken my contacts out and put my glasses on.  I have first degree burns on my chest and face.  I'm hoping they don't turn into second degree burns.

Someone just pass me my sign, would you?

(Yes, I've been icing my chest and face but the face is still burning!)

I did the same thing...twice. Not realizing that if you put hot soup in the blender, it will go boom.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Jelaza on December 02, 2011, 09:17:11 PM
Just did this tonight.

I just took the garbage out to throw it into the dumpster.  I had the bag of garbage and my keys in the same hand.  Tossed the bag in....and my keys.  Keychain had the building key, the key to my unit and the key to my mailbox on in (glad I keep the car keys on a separate keychain).  I can actually see the keys, right on top of the bag I just threw in, but cannot reach them.

I climbed into the dumpster grabbed the keys and climbed back out.  I had to tear the garbage bag, because the reason the keys went in with the bag (when they never have before) is because the plastic bag had somehow gotten twisted into the keychain while I was carrying them.

And I ripped a ginormous hole in my pants.  Good thing I was just wearing sweatpants and not anything nice.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: TOLady on December 05, 2011, 02:32:02 PM
This didn't happen to me, but my older brother.

For some reason, I decided to just "drop in" on my brother, which I had never done before. We lived in the same city, but didn't get together too often (we're not that close). I didn't have to ring up to the apartment, so he was completely not expecting me. I wasn't even sure if he'd be home.

I knocked on the door and heard some cursing and fumbling at the door. He opened it and I was confronted by my older brother dressed only in his scivvies. I was, of course I was completely taken aback, but he hurriedly ushered me in with the rather strange question - What do you put on a grease fire?

I ran into the kitchen to face an inferno in his kitchen. He had been making french fries on the stove top and had lit the oil on fire. I asked him where his baking soda was, and of course it was in the cupboard - directly above the flames.

I grabbed the box and doused the flames (only getting the hairs burnt off my arms, so not too bad) and from then on was allowed to drop by any time I wanted. Next time I visited, it was with a fire extinguisher and an electric deep fryer.

We got closer after that until he moved to the other side of the country, but we still talk about that.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jedikaiti on December 05, 2011, 02:44:51 PM
Kitchen Catastrophe as Family Bonding! I love it!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Fleur-de-Lis on December 05, 2011, 06:40:44 PM
Don't eat the cheese-flavored crackers when you're actually hungry. You will end up munching on 3-5 servings of them, and then feel wretched afterward when your body remonstrates you for the attack upon it.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Sirius on December 06, 2011, 04:04:25 PM
This just happened a couple of days ago.

I was sitting at my computer working, when I happened to notice a dark item out of the corner of my eye.  My cats are both dark grey tabbies, so I thought it was one of them and reached over to pet it.  I didn't realize until I touched the dark item that I had just petted my purse.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: 2littlemonkeys on December 06, 2011, 04:08:24 PM
LOL!

My MIL has a coat with a faux fur rimmed hood.  The fur is black.

I "Psst"d and shooed at it for a good few seconds before I realized I was yelling at her coat.  I thought the cat was laying on it.   ::)  It still fakes me out sometimes.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: tiff019 on December 06, 2011, 06:33:13 PM
Don't open your car's boot (trunk) and then put the keys on the parcelshelf while you switch from your pumps to your boots because you will shut the boot, leaving the keys on the parcelshelf.  This means you are then locked out of your car because you opened the boot before unlocking the rest of the car and you are also locked out of your house.  You then end up ringing your breakdown insurance company who tell you that your cover has expired so you'll have to pay the recovery man when he arrives which will be in an hour.

This means you have to sit outside in the freezing cold and dark waiting for the recovery man to arrive.  Your landlord will arrive at the same time as the recovery man and will try not to laugh at the girl in a skirt and tights with wet hair who has been sitting outside.


Moral of the story: when you lose your spare set of car keys, get a new one - don't leave it a year and a half *facepalm*

On the plus side: you hadn't locked your phone in the car too. ;)

I did almost exactly this with a rental car. I was putting a few things in the trunk preparing to go to the airport and home. Fortunately, I had my purse in hand with cell phone and the rental car agreement I had just pulled out. I didn't have roadside assistance with the rental company, but the person on the desk phone was nice enough to give me the number of several local locksmiths her company used. The guy was able to get the door open and pop the trunk lock from inside the car. And since I'm very paranoid about missing a flight, I had been packing the car early enough that I still had time to get to the airport and check in with a little time to spare.

This is exactly the reason why when I open my trunk, I leave the keys in the lock on the trunk. After 2 or 3 times of locking my keys in the trunk, I figured if I leave them there, I CAN'T lock them inside. =)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Cutenoob on December 06, 2011, 07:56:53 PM
Don't try to change the sheets just after you've painted your nails. Even if it's been half an hour, they are NOT DRY. *derp*
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: kitty-cat on December 06, 2011, 08:53:47 PM
Don't open your car's boot (trunk) and then put the keys on the parcelshelf while you switch from your pumps to your boots because you will shut the boot, leaving the keys on the parcelshelf.  This means you are then locked out of your car because you opened the boot before unlocking the rest of the car and you are also locked out of your house.  You then end up ringing your breakdown insurance company who tell you that your cover has expired so you'll have to pay the recovery man when he arrives which will be in an hour.

This means you have to sit outside in the freezing cold and dark waiting for the recovery man to arrive.  Your landlord will arrive at the same time as the recovery man and will try not to laugh at the girl in a skirt and tights with wet hair who has been sitting outside.


Moral of the story: when you lose your spare set of car keys, get a new one - don't leave it a year and a half *facepalm*

On the plus side: you hadn't locked your phone in the car too. ;)

I did almost exactly this with a rental car. I was putting a few things in the trunk preparing to go to the airport and home. Fortunately, I had my purse in hand with cell phone and the rental car agreement I had just pulled out. I didn't have roadside assistance with the rental company, but the person on the desk phone was nice enough to give me the number of several local locksmiths her company used. The guy was able to get the door open and pop the trunk lock from inside the car. And since I'm very paranoid about missing a flight, I had been packing the car early enough that I still had time to get to the airport and check in with a little time to spare.

This is exactly the reason why when I open my trunk, I leave the keys in the lock on the trunk. After 2 or 3 times of locking my keys in the trunk, I figured if I leave them there, I CAN'T lock them inside. =)

And this is why I love the fact we figured out the code on my truck for the old "keyless entry" from the days where it was buttons u pushed on the door. I've locked them in my car a few times since then, but I've never had to call mom about it.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Eeep! on December 08, 2011, 11:36:27 AM
This just happened a couple of days ago.

I was sitting at my computer working, when I happened to notice a dark item out of the corner of my eye.  My cats are both dark grey tabbies, so I thought it was one of them and reached over to pet it.  I didn't realize until I touched the dark item that I had just petted my purse.

Ha!  I have done this before with a sweatshirt on the foot of the bed - reached down to pet my kitty. hee.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: blueyzca01 on December 08, 2011, 12:44:51 PM
Just did this tonight.

I just took the garbage out to throw it into the dumpster.  I had the bag of garbage and my keys in the same hand.  Tossed the bag in....and my keys.  Keychain had the building key, the key to my unit and the key to my mailbox on in (glad I keep the car keys on a separate keychain).  I can actually see the keys, right on top of the bag I just threw in, but cannot reach them.

I climbed into the dumpster grabbed the keys and climbed back out.  I had to tear the garbage bag, because the reason the keys went in with the bag (when they never have before) is because the plastic bag had somehow gotten twisted into the keychain while I was carrying them.

And I ripped a ginormous hole in my pants.  Good thing I was just wearing sweatpants and not anything nice.

I did this one time too many before discovering these:  http://www.nextag.com/Baumgartens-Key-Reels-Keychains-527611080/prices-html

They have saved me multiple times since.

Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: eclecticgrrl on December 08, 2011, 12:45:16 PM
EclecticGuy just pulled one of these and will be mocked for months accordingly.

Our bathroom faucet had developed a leak.  Bad.  Our grandson was washing his hands and the leak suddenly turned into a sort of sideways spritz.  Worse.  So no more using the upstairs bathroom sink.

EclecticGuy was at a football game for this revelation and came home a little on the inebriated side.  I was on the computer when he came upstairs and I called out "Hey!  Don't use the bathroom sink, okay?  It's broken!"

eGuy says "But I can still use the toilet, right?" 

Me:  "um...  yeah.  But you can't wash your hands in the sink."

Him:  "No problem."

He disappears into the bathroom and there's some rustling noises and I'm thinking "I should probably remind him about the sink.  But he's a grown up.  He knows I said not to use it.  He doesn't need reminded..."

Then I hear the sound of water spraying everywhere and eGuy yelling obscenities and I come rushing in to see water spraying from the top of the faucet up to the ceiling like Old Faithful as I scream "What part of DON'T USE THE SINK didn't you understand?!?"

Poor eGuy.  We ended up having to turn the water off in the basement because the handle under the sink also didn't work and he had to call his friend to come over and help him do emergency plumbing.  It was an epic fail.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Betelnut on December 08, 2011, 02:10:53 PM
This just happened a couple of days ago.

I was sitting at my computer working, when I happened to notice a dark item out of the corner of my eye.  My cats are both dark grey tabbies, so I thought it was one of them and reached over to pet it.  I didn't realize until I touched the dark item that I had just petted my purse.

Ha!  I have done this before with a sweatshirt on the foot of the bed - reached down to pet my kitty. hee.

Many times I've slept all wonky and twisted because I swore my cat was at the foot of the bed--only to realize that it wasn't the cat at all.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: ica171 on December 08, 2011, 04:42:02 PM
This just happened a couple of days ago.

I was sitting at my computer working, when I happened to notice a dark item out of the corner of my eye.  My cats are both dark grey tabbies, so I thought it was one of them and reached over to pet it.  I didn't realize until I touched the dark item that I had just petted my purse.

I do this all the time (did it last night with a pair of black shorts DH left on the floor), but it reminds me of another story. I live in an area known for having black squirrels everywhere. I also have a black cat with a fluffy tail. At least twice I have mistaken the cat for a squirrel (I don't know how I thought the squirrel got inside) and started freaking out. The most embarrassing time has to be the first time. I was sleeping and heard a thud. I opened my eyes to see the cat hanging from the windowsill. The window was open and she had tried to jump up but didn't make it and was hanging by her front paws. I started screaming "There's a squirrel on the window!" DH woke up, looked over and started laughing. He said it was just the cat, but I was still partially asleep so it took me a minute to wake up enough to believe him. He's never going to let me live that down.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: siamesecat2965 on December 09, 2011, 01:00:32 PM
This just happened a couple of days ago.

I was sitting at my computer working, when I happened to notice a dark item out of the corner of my eye.  My cats are both dark grey tabbies, so I thought it was one of them and reached over to pet it.  I didn't realize until I touched the dark item that I had just petted my purse.

I do this all the time (did it last night with a pair of black shorts DH left on the floor), but it reminds me of another story. I live in an area known for having black squirrels everywhere. I also have a black cat with a fluffy tail. At least twice I have mistaken the cat for a squirrel (I don't know how I thought the squirrel got inside) and started freaking out. The most embarrassing time has to be the first time. I was sleeping and heard a thud. I opened my eyes to see the cat hanging from the windowsill. The window was open and she had tried to jump up but didn't make it and was hanging by her front paws. I started screaming "There's a squirrel on the window!" DH woke up, looked over and started laughing. He said it was just the cat, but I was still partially asleep so it took me a minute to wake up enough to believe him. He's never going to let me live that down.

I mistook an animal for a  cat once too, only it was the black and white stinky kind!  I was walking home from the bus one night, and it was dark.  My eyesight isn't the best to begin with, and in the dark its worse.  I see this animal wandering down the sidewalk and I think "oh,  cute kitty cat" and start to move towards it. Then I realized not only was it black with a white stripe down its back, it didn't move QUITE like a kitty.  Oops.  I quickly crossed the street and ran!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Outdoor Girl on December 09, 2011, 01:52:28 PM
I mistook an animal for a  cat once too, only it was the black and white stinky kind!  I was walking home from the bus one night, and it was dark.  My eyesight isn't the best to begin with, and in the dark its worse.  I see this animal wandering down the sidewalk and I think "oh,  cute kitty cat" and start to move towards it. Then I realized not only was it black with a white stripe down its back, it didn't move QUITE like a kitty.  Oops.  I quickly crossed the street and ran!

I'm known as the skunk whisperer in my office, as I trapped one by mistake (I was trying to get rid of some racoons) and successfully let it go without me or my car getting sprayed.

Here's the secret:  Don't make any sudden movements.  Talk to it calmly in a quiet voice while you slowly back away.  If they're not frightened or startled, they won't spray.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Pinky830 on December 09, 2011, 03:23:43 PM
This just happened a couple of days ago.

I was sitting at my computer working, when I happened to notice a dark item out of the corner of my eye.  My cats are both dark grey tabbies, so I thought it was one of them and reached over to pet it.  I didn't realize until I touched the dark item that I had just petted my purse.

Ha!  I have done this before with a sweatshirt on the foot of the bed - reached down to pet my kitty. hee.

DH did the opposite. He reached into the back of a dark closet and thought he was picking up a black shirt. He put his hand on the cat, who liked to sleep in there. So when he touched something warm and furry that moved, he almost died.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: sevenday on December 09, 2011, 04:28:24 PM
RE: touching the cat in the closet-  been there, done that.  I have the trifecta of cats - one mostly white, one tuxedo, and one tortoiseshell, so almost all the color ranges are covered.  The hallway that leads from my room to the rest of the house is the least-lit spot in the entire place due to the layout of furniture in the living-dining-kitchen-room.  I can't tell you how many times I have tripped/stepped on (or nearly so) a cat, particularly the tuxedo.  I have also had moments of "something's watching me" and not see anything - until a previously motionless cat perched on some random item moves and startles the heck out of me.  To make it worse - we have a black hutch, an ivory recliner, and a brown table. They are all perfect camouflage spots for each cat, you can guess which ones belong to which.  My tuxedo has also discovered, with the addition of a new cat tree, how to get to the top of a set of cabinets along the long wall.  I did not know he had discovered this until he sailed down from atop them into the middle of a puzzle I was working on.  It took me a long time to get my heart rate down, then collect the scattered pieces.

Here's my "stupid thing" -- I once put something in the oven - I don't remember what.  Either a pizza or something like fish sticks.  I put the tray into the oven and walked away. Came back and went "... why does it smell odd in here?"  Opened it and discovered green goop all over the bottom of the stove.  After much panic, I discovered that my ex had apparently had cinnamon rolls or something with a substance that was sticky, and then for some unknown reason moved the empty tray atop it so that they were stuck together.  It took... a very long time... to scrape the solidifed plastic goo off the bottom of the stove AND the wire racks.  You can bet I made him help me.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Luci on December 09, 2011, 06:44:14 PM
We will never, ever discuss the time I lit the camper oven and - mouse, dead but at least fresh, not dehydrated....the biscuits were discarded........... Now, I know how to check the oven before I try to cook...... sigh....Luci..
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: doodlemor on December 10, 2011, 07:38:54 PM
I made a big mess tonight.  Here is what not to do:

When making fresh cranberry sauce in a blender with orange and cider for processing, don't use a wooden spoon to push the berries down to blend.  If you push it too far down it will hit the blades, and when the wooden spoon hits the blades most of the cranberry mixture will be expelled from the top.

It will be all the way from the ceiling to the floor, and you will be wearing some of it, and your hair will have bits in it. 

Now I'm going to get into the shower.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: zyrs on December 24, 2011, 05:55:45 PM
If the zipper doesn't unzip the first time, don't keep zipping up the jacket trying to see why it's not unzipping.  Especially do not bend your head forward trying to see and ending up zipping your beard into the zipper that you shouldn't be zipping up, because it doesn't unzip.

Understand that while trying to remove your beard from the zipped zipper is going to hurt, it will still be better than having to call your wife to help you get out of the predicament you have gotten yourself into.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Black Delphinium on December 24, 2011, 06:30:41 PM
If the zipper doesn't unzip the first time, don't keep zipping up the jacket trying to see why it's not unzipping.  Especially do not bend your head forward trying to see and ending up zipping your beard into the zipper that you shouldn't be zipping up, because it doesn't unzip.

Understand that while trying to remove your beard from the zipped zipper is going to hurt, it will still be better than having to call your wife to help you get out of the predicament you have gotten yourself into.
I got you beat, I caught my eyelid in the zipper of a windbreaker.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Diane AKA Traska on December 24, 2011, 07:42:36 PM
If the zipper doesn't unzip the first time, don't keep zipping up the jacket trying to see why it's not unzipping.  Especially do not bend your head forward trying to see and ending up zipping your beard into the zipper that you shouldn't be zipping up, because it doesn't unzip.

Understand that while trying to remove your beard from the zipped zipper is going to hurt, it will still be better than having to call your wife to help you get out of the predicament you have gotten yourself into.
I got you beat, I caught my eyelid in the zipper of a windbreaker.

Y'ever get that full body shudder, where it's accompanied by an involuntary "ugh-ugh-ugh" kind of sound?  Yeah...
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: zyrs on December 25, 2011, 04:44:53 AM
If the zipper doesn't unzip the first time, don't keep zipping up the jacket trying to see why it's not unzipping.  Especially do not bend your head forward trying to see and ending up zipping your beard into the zipper that you shouldn't be zipping up, because it doesn't unzip.

Understand that while trying to remove your beard from the zipped zipper is going to hurt, it will still be better than having to call your wife to help you get out of the predicament you have gotten yourself into.
I got you beat, I caught my eyelid in the zipper of a windbreaker.

Oh ouch.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Black Delphinium on December 25, 2011, 10:20:33 AM
If the zipper doesn't unzip the first time, don't keep zipping up the jacket trying to see why it's not unzipping.  Especially do not bend your head forward trying to see and ending up zipping your beard into the zipper that you shouldn't be zipping up, because it doesn't unzip.

Understand that while trying to remove your beard from the zipped zipper is going to hurt, it will still be better than having to call your wife to help you get out of the predicament you have gotten yourself into.
I got you beat, I caught my eyelid in the zipper of a windbreaker.

Oh ouch.
They brought over the student nurses to see while I was in the ER, they'd never had a woman in that was caught in a zipper...men, but not women.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jpcher on December 25, 2011, 01:43:10 PM
just trying to figure out how you would get your eyelid caught in a zipper . . .

my mind is going through all sorts of contortions right now . . .




If the zipper doesn't unzip the first time, don't keep zipping up the jacket trying to see why it's not unzipping.  Especially do not bend your head forward trying to see and ending up zipping your beard into the zipper that you shouldn't be zipping up, because it doesn't unzip.

Understand that while trying to remove your beard from the zipped zipper is going to hurt, it will still be better than having to call your wife to help you get out of the predicament you have gotten yourself into.
;D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Black Delphinium on December 25, 2011, 04:04:23 PM
1)Pull winderbreaker over head

2)Realize that the zipper is still up

3)Try to pull down zipper without removing windbreaker

4)Pain and panic
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Pinky830 on December 26, 2011, 08:41:11 PM
I had a fishing rod in the back seat of my car once. I reached back to move it over for some reason, and felt that telltale ZING in my hand.

I forced myself to very calmly slow down, pull over, and carefully remove the hook from my hand. Thank goodness the barb hadn't caught on it, just poked myself with the point. I can't tell you how hard I was fighting the urge to scream and thrash my hand around.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Otterpop on December 26, 2011, 10:13:54 PM
Ooooh, ouch!  That reminds me of the time my daughter was playing with the knife drawer (she was obsessed with the sliding, metal sound).  I scolded and shooed her out of the kitchen.  However, she had wedged a pair of scissors in the open position so the drawer wouldn't shut.  I remember telling her that she could get hurt as I carefully (and blindly) hooked my index finger around the top of the scissors and tugged.  The scissors shut and my middle finger slammed down on a knife tip.  Panicked, I yanked my hand out of the drawer.  The knife ripped through the tip, of course.  Lots of blood and many stitches later (all witnessed by said daughter) she never opened that drawer again.  If I'm ever pierced again, I'll remember to stay cool, collected and remove the flesh in the least injurious manner (hopefully).

Good thinking Pinky830.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Yvaine on December 26, 2011, 11:31:27 PM
This just happened a couple of days ago.

I was sitting at my computer working, when I happened to notice a dark item out of the corner of my eye.  My cats are both dark grey tabbies, so I thought it was one of them and reached over to pet it.  I didn't realize until I touched the dark item that I had just petted my purse.

I may have already posted this years ago and forgotten about it.

In college, I had burgundy slippers. My phone (this was a land line) was also burgundy, and the receiver for some types of phone is roughly the size of a foot.

Roommate and I often kept the phone on the floor, because we'd sit in the beanbag chair to talk on it.

Phone rang while I was napping. I woke up, groggy and sans spectacles, and "answered" one of my slippers.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Sirius on December 26, 2011, 11:49:22 PM
One morning the alarm clock went off, and I picked up the phone receiver and said, "Hello?"  I then noticed that the noise hadn't stopped.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: JolieFille on December 27, 2011, 03:14:41 AM
I shouldn't have sharp objects. I just shouldn't.

In 8th grade art, we were making prints. Our teacher allowed us to scan and trace pictures we liked so I picked a book cover that had a scorpion on it. I'm happily cutting away with my hand in the path of the blade when I slip. And gouge my little finger. I lifted my hand up and the most awesome river of red was running down it. So I walk past my wide eyed teacher who's gone slightly pale to the nurse. The teacher sent another student after me, as it really was an impressive amount of blood. On the way out of the classroom, a group of people who liked to mock me for reasons I still don't quite know, dared me to lick the blood that was dripping down my arm. I did. I thought it was amazingly funny that the entire room was pale. I think this could be why no one was ever sure if I was a vampire or not after that. I can quite assure you that I'm human, but they didn't believe it.  And they stopped mocking me. Yeah, the school nurse took one look at that, and started washing my arm and hand and called my mom to come and get me.  I made sure to let the nurse know about the trail I'd left on my way there, so the janitor could mop it up. I now have a triangular grove missing from my little finger on my left hand. And it was all my fault too, had I not had my hand in the way.

Scissors. I was playing around one day a few months ago, with a pair of scissors absentmindedly opening and closing them in front of my face. I was reading and not paying attention when I go. . "Why is there wet stuff running down my face?" I cut my lip. with the scissors.  ::)


I'm also not allowed to play doge ball. I knew it was a bad idea the second we started playing, but I just went with it, because well it was gym and that's part of it. Until I turned my head. For a fraction a second. A much larger guy had just thrown a ball and it hit me right on the side of my face, so hard that my earring popped out and flew the other way. (yes, i probably shouldn't have been wearing it, but they never enforced those rules, because our lockers were barely big enough for a pair of shoes). The guy who threw it felt so bad, and I'm standing there laughing, because I knew this would happen. He was falling over himself apologizing, and I told him it was okay, but I'd love it if he could find my earring. The teacher then made me go sit down, as I couldn't hear very well out of that ear, and she never made me play doge ball ever again.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Nora on January 01, 2012, 11:23:02 AM
I shouldn't have sharp objects. I just shouldn't.

In 8th grade art, we were making prints. Our teacher allowed us to scan and trace pictures we liked so I picked a book cover that had a scorpion on it. I'm happily cutting away with my hand in the path of the blade when I slip. And gouge my little finger. I lifted my hand up and the most awesome river of red was running down it. So I walk past my wide eyed teacher who's gone slightly pale to the nurse. The teacher sent another student after me, as it really was an impressive amount of blood. On the way out of the classroom, a group of people who liked to mock me for reasons I still don't quite know, dared me to lick the blood that was dripping down my arm. I did. I thought it was amazingly funny that the entire room was pale. I think this could be why no one was ever sure if I was a vampire or not after that. I can quite assure you that I'm human, but they didn't believe it.  And they stopped mocking me. Yeah, the school nurse took one look at that, and started washing my arm and hand and called my mom to come and get me.  I made sure to let the nurse know about the trail I'd left on my way there, so the janitor could mop it up. I now have a triangular grove missing from my little finger on my left hand. And it was all my fault too, had I not had my hand in the way.



I know this was not what I was supposed to take away from this story, but what an AWESOME way of dealing with bullies!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: JolieFille on January 01, 2012, 05:22:58 PM
I shouldn't have sharp objects. I just shouldn't.

In 8th grade art, we were making prints. Our teacher allowed us to scan and trace pictures we liked so I picked a book cover that had a scorpion on it. I'm happily cutting away with my hand in the path of the blade when I slip. And gouge my little finger. I lifted my hand up and the most awesome river of red was running down it. So I walk past my wide eyed teacher who's gone slightly pale to the nurse. The teacher sent another student after me, as it really was an impressive amount of blood. On the way out of the classroom, a group of people who liked to mock me for reasons I still don't quite know, dared me to lick the blood that was dripping down my arm. I did. I thought it was amazingly funny that the entire room was pale. I think this could be why no one was ever sure if I was a vampire or not after that. I can quite assure you that I'm human, but they didn't believe it.  And they stopped mocking me. Yeah, the school nurse took one look at that, and started washing my arm and hand and called my mom to come and get me.  I made sure to let the nurse know about the trail I'd left on my way there, so the janitor could mop it up. I now have a triangular grove missing from my little finger on my left hand. And it was all my fault too, had I not had my hand in the way.



I know this was not what I was supposed to take away from this story, but what an AWESOME way of dealing with bullies!

Lol I guess they didn't expect me to actually do it. They were really odd too. One girl liked to come up behind me and shout in my ear so I jumped. Another liked to put her hands on my feet so I would almost trip. She got a lecture about if I fell and got broken because of her, I would hold them responsible. And then that happened and I guess they decided I was too much trouble to pick on anymore.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: KenveeB on January 02, 2012, 07:09:14 PM
This is going to go down as a famous Christmas in my mother's book.  I told her about Amazon.com wishlists, and she thought this was an awesome idea. I emailed her the link to my list, and she asked my brother and his girlfriend to make lists as well.  Brother's GF is quite hard to get to know, so Mom was happy to have stuff that she knew GF would like.  Come Christmas morning, and GF starts opening things. She has a puzzled expression at the first two books, and finally confesses that neither of them were on her list.  It took a while to figure it out, but we finally realized that all the books had either a main character or an author who shared GF's first name.  And we realized that instead of searching for a wishlist, Mom had just entered GF's name in the regular Amazon search bar and got a bunch of books featuring those names!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Melde on January 02, 2012, 09:15:06 PM
I am still not entirely sure of the exact order of events, but I once ended up accidentily gluing a still smoldering and red matchhead to my finger. And they say that the Girl Guides are too soft!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Adelaide on January 03, 2012, 03:48:28 AM
The other day I was helping my mom unload the groceries. I went to take a plastic bag from her and clearly remember thinking that I had a grip on it through the handles and that my fingers would catch in the loop. As I was not, in fact, gripping the handles, the bag fell on the ground. It was 2 liters of ginger ale and as a teeny tiny hole had been broken in it, the pressurized bottle spun around and around, soaking my mother, myself, and the car with ginger ale. We only had one liter of ginger ale that night, but it turned out to be enough.  ::)

When I was in high school, we had a history teacher who was known for giving out ridiculous, "read-between-the-lines" short-answer homework that went way in-depth. We all had a habit of looking over everyone's completed work to see if we were on the same page about everything and so we could discuss it if we weren't (The teacher gave her blessing and said she wanted us to "think outside the box" and "collaborate with one another"). The teacher would come around every morning, scan the homework, and make a check mark in her notebook if we'd done everything. "Hannah" was in the 1st class and I was in the 3rd. I had borrowed her homework to compare it the night before and had promptly forgot that I was supposed to return it before school. Imagine my horror when I open up my AP Psychology book in my 1st class to see her homework. I was terrified that Hannah was going to murder me for the zero I had undoubtedly gotten her. I asked to go to the bathroom in Psychology and sprinted down the hall, knocking on my history teacher's door and holding up the work. I stuttered some lame explanation about how I had found it in the hall, and was this anybody's homework? Hannah shot me the Look of Death the entire time I was in that class, but the teacher, at least, bought my excuse.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Midnight Kitty on January 03, 2012, 02:47:31 PM
Slightly brain dead:  When putting a cup under the tap to fill it with water, make sure the cup is right side up.  Because I was apparently sleep walking when I put the cup under the tap to get a drink of water and ended up getting a bit of a shower instead.

FWIW - This was yesterday morning and I decided that was my clue to go back to bed for another hour. ;D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: SeptGurl on January 03, 2012, 03:36:16 PM
I was getting out of the car at work one morning, when my hand slipped as I was locking the door. Somehow, I managed to drop the keys on the ground and lock my right hand in the door simultaneously. I couldn't get my hand out, and I couldn't reach the keys. I stood there waiting for someone to walk by so they could hand me my keys. A man came by, and he handed me the keys. I calmly took them, thanked the man, unlocked the door, and freed my hand.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: guihong on January 03, 2012, 03:47:35 PM
When you're frying hamburgers, it's probably a good idea not to put them directly into a Zip-Lock bag.  If you decide to do this, make sure the bag doesn't have a hole in it.  You will drop said hamburger on your (bare) foot, causing you to yell, "YAHHH!", scaring the cats, and sending both hamburger and the spatula flying across the kitchen, splattering grease  ::).
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Luci on January 03, 2012, 04:43:07 PM
I was getting out of the car at work one morning, when my hand slipped as I was locking the door. Somehow, I managed to drop the keys on the ground and lock my right hand in the door simultaneously.

How do you lock your hand in a door? I can see catching a sleeve or the tip of a glove, but a hand?
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Hollymom1229 on January 03, 2012, 04:55:08 PM
When you buy a previously owned house remember to clean everything, even the not obvious stuff, like the fan over the stove.  Because when your husband flambees something on that stove the first time, and the fan catches on fire because of the built up grease from the previous owner's cooking, you don't want that to be the moment you realize you haven't bought a fire extinguisher yet.

On the up side it spun on fire for a horrifying ten seconds and then the whole thing just collapsed onto the stove and went out on its own.  DH did save dinner prior to the collapse and it was a truly lovely meal.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jpcher on January 03, 2012, 05:43:08 PM
I was getting out of the car at work one morning, when my hand slipped as I was locking the door. Somehow, I managed to drop the keys on the ground and lock my right hand in the door simultaneously.

How do you lock your hand in a door? I can see catching a sleeve or the tip of a glove, but a hand?

I managed to slam the car door on my thumb once. Fortunately the door wasn't locked, but I did have to drop my cello which resulted in a broken bridge.

I was amazed that there weren't any broken bones, but I do still have a scar.

Coley -- hope your hand is okay!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: SeptGurl on January 03, 2012, 05:51:03 PM
I was getting out of the car at work one morning, when my hand slipped as I was locking the door. Somehow, I managed to drop the keys on the ground and lock my right hand in the door simultaneously.

How do you lock your hand in a door? I can see catching a sleeve or the tip of a glove, but a hand?

Literally, it was all four fingers on my right hand. I was holding onto the doorframe, and the door closed faster than I was expecting. The whole thing was very surprising and rather humorous. Sort of like the time I stapled my thumb when I was a kid. I just stood there looking at the staple in my thumb and wondering how it happened.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: SeptGurl on January 03, 2012, 05:57:00 PM
I was getting out of the car at work one morning, when my hand slipped as I was locking the door. Somehow, I managed to drop the keys on the ground and lock my right hand in the door simultaneously.

How do you lock your hand in a door? I can see catching a sleeve or the tip of a glove, but a hand?

I managed to slam the car door on my thumb once. Fortunately the door wasn't locked, but I did have to drop my cello which resulted in a broken bridge.

I was amazed that there weren't any broken bones, but I do still have a scar.

Coley -- hope your hand is okay!

Oh no! A broken bridge is no fun at all. In my case, my hand was just fine, which is one of the reasons why the whole situation was so surprising. I have slammed my hand in the car door before and it hurt like crazy, but this time it wasn't like that. The door just closed and latched to a point that I couldn't slide my hand out, and it was locked, so I was really stuck. No pain or anything. Just a very weird position to be in.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: White Dragon on January 03, 2012, 09:24:42 PM
I got a little kitchen mandolin for Christmas and decided to try it out yesterday.

I was just slicing a clove of garlic so clearly it was too small to use the hand guard.

Yeah.
I made the rest of the turkey and stuffing with a very bandaged thumb and only one hand.


edited to replace fun with thumb.  I do not know how one bandages a fun - or even what one is!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Eeep! on January 04, 2012, 11:19:09 AM
This is going to go down as a famous Christmas in my mother's book.  I told her about Amazon.com wishlists, and she thought this was an awesome idea. I emailed her the link to my list, and she asked my brother and his girlfriend to make lists as well.  Brother's GF is quite hard to get to know, so Mom was happy to have stuff that she knew GF would like.  Come Christmas morning, and GF starts opening things. She has a puzzled expression at the first two books, and finally confesses that neither of them were on her list.  It took a while to figure it out, but we finally realized that all the books had either a main character or an author who shared GF's first name.  And we realized that instead of searching for a wishlist, Mom had just entered GF's name in the regular Amazon search bar and got a bunch of books featuring those names!

Ahahahahaha! This one made me almost laugh at loud at work.  That is so hilarious!  If GF had a common name, your mom must have been impressed by the extensive list that GF had! (Out of curiousity, I put my name in and it came up with like 20,000 hits off of my first or last name- but only 2 based on my full name. One of which is a German book since my last name is German.) I can totally see my MIL doing something like this. (My mother avoids computers entirely.)
Thanks again for the good morning laugh!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: tiff019 on January 04, 2012, 11:23:09 AM
This is going to go down as a famous Christmas in my mother's book.  I told her about Amazon.com wishlists, and she thought this was an awesome idea. I emailed her the link to my list, and she asked my brother and his girlfriend to make lists as well.  Brother's GF is quite hard to get to know, so Mom was happy to have stuff that she knew GF would like.  Come Christmas morning, and GF starts opening things. She has a puzzled expression at the first two books, and finally confesses that neither of them were on her list.  It took a while to figure it out, but we finally realized that all the books had either a main character or an author who shared GF's first name.  And we realized that instead of searching for a wishlist, Mom had just entered GF's name in the regular Amazon search bar and got a bunch of books featuring those names!

Ahahahahaha! This one made me almost laugh at loud at work.  That is so hilarious!  If GF had a common name, your mom must have been impressed by the extensive list that GF had! (Out of curiousity, I put my name in and it came up with like 20,000 hits off of my first or last name- but only 2 based on my full name. One of which is a German book since my last name is German.) I can totally see my MIL doing something like this. (My mother avoids computers entirely.)
Thanks again for the good morning laugh!

Oooh... with my name i might end up with some awesome jewelry or lamps =) haha
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Rohanna on January 04, 2012, 11:31:21 AM
Erm.... My first result is a "scrabble toy"   :o
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Diane AKA Traska on January 04, 2012, 12:17:02 PM
Aaaaand we have a new forum game!

My first hit is a book on Lincoln.  (This may need to be split off...)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: EmmaJ. on January 04, 2012, 12:34:27 PM
This is fun!  My first hit is Bible stories.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jedikaiti on January 04, 2012, 12:38:18 PM
We have a spinoff thread: http://www.etiquettehell.com/smf/index.php?topic=112155.0
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Thipu1 on January 04, 2012, 12:47:02 PM
When I first started Googling my name, I got the work references I expected.  I also got tuned into a Scottish illustrator.  I never knew she existed but I find I like her work very much.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Miss Understood on January 04, 2012, 01:13:49 PM
If you have very long hair, always remember to put it up before vacuuming the stairs with a hand vacuum.   :-[
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: alkira6 on January 04, 2012, 02:00:53 PM
Frying bacon naked.  No romantic brekkie in bed that morning.  I still have a quite impressive freckle/scar on my left boob from the splatter.

Driving with no pants. even if the drivethrough is only 1/4 of a mile from home. You will be pulled over. The nice policeman will  laugh himself breathless and let you go home. You will still be hungry but too embarrassed to go back out with pants.

Eat kittie food on a dare. not tasty at all and the taste stays with you for days. Dog food on the other hand can be quite tasty, particularly if it's the kind in the little clear plastic tubs that is labeled as chicken stew.

Grab a rosebush for transplanting with your bare hands. Bonus points if you have yanked at it and have all of the thorns come off in your hand.

Floor skate in socks in front of a fireplace that is lit.  I had to have all of my hair trimmed to one length to match what burned off the front.

Bonus points if you do this all after 30, because sometimes you don't learn.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Sirius on January 04, 2012, 02:57:27 PM
I got a little kitchen mandolin for Christmas and decided to try it out yesterday.

I was just slicing a clove of garlic so clearly it was too small to use the hand guard.

Yeah.
I made the rest of the turkey and stuffing with a very bandaged thumb and only one hand.


edited to replace fun with thumb.  I do not know how one bandages a fun - or even what one is!

Every time someone talks about a mandolin, I'm picturing someone standing in the kitchen playing the stringed instrument.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Sirius on January 04, 2012, 03:00:40 PM
This is going to go down as a famous Christmas in my mother's book.  I told her about Amazon.com wishlists, and she thought this was an awesome idea. I emailed her the link to my list, and she asked my brother and his girlfriend to make lists as well.  Brother's GF is quite hard to get to know, so Mom was happy to have stuff that she knew GF would like.  Come Christmas morning, and GF starts opening things. She has a puzzled expression at the first two books, and finally confesses that neither of them were on her list.  It took a while to figure it out, but we finally realized that all the books had either a main character or an author who shared GF's first name.  And we realized that instead of searching for a wishlist, Mom had just entered GF's name in the regular Amazon search bar and got a bunch of books featuring those names!


Ahahahahaha! This one made me almost laugh at loud at work.  That is so hilarious!  If GF had a common name, your mom must have been impressed by the extensive list that GF had! (Out of curiousity, I put my name in and it came up with like 20,000 hits off of my first or last name- but only 2 based on my full name. One of which is a German book since my last name is German.) I can totally see my MIL doing something like this. (My mother avoids computers entirely.)
Thanks again for the good morning laugh!

I got a movie starring Elizabeth Taylor that I've never heard of.

Edited to actually add my comment this time.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Amara on January 04, 2012, 03:48:49 PM
alkira6, that is hilarious! Those experiences sound awful--actually, I have experience with #1--but you sure make them funny. Thanks for the laughs.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Cutenoob on January 04, 2012, 11:14:28 PM
Go blackberry/berry picking without snips. Or wearing jeans that you LIKE. Or a rain jacket.
Yeah. Finger stains, found a pair of jeans I wanted to shred, and realized that when it's sunny, it's great picking weather.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Redsoil on January 05, 2012, 06:27:56 AM
Back in the old farmhouse, we had a wood-burning stove which put out a wonderful amount of heat.  However, overnight, it was banked, so in order to warm up the next morning you needed to stand quite close to it. 

Given that the rest of the house was like an icebox, I would get dressed in front of the stove.  Putting my jeans on one morning, I bent over, only to realise in a very painful way that I was a little TOO close to the stove.  Yeeeeeeeeeeoooooowwwwww!!!!!!

Blisters on the bum make life very awkward.  Blisters on the bum when one has to wear jeans, even worse.  Blisters on the bum, whilst wearing jeans and mustering cattle on a motorbike in a rough paddock?  Indeed...
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: 2littlemonkeys on January 05, 2012, 11:12:12 AM
Back in the old farmhouse, we had a wood-burning stove which put out a wonderful amount of heat.  However, overnight, it was banked, so in order to warm up the next morning you needed to stand quite close to it. 

Given that the rest of the house was like an icebox, I would get dressed in front of the stove.  Putting my jeans on one morning, I bent over, only to realise in a very painful way that I was a little TOO close to the stove.  Yeeeeeeeeeeoooooowwwwww!!!!!!

Blisters on the bum make life very awkward.  Blisters on the bum when one has to wear jeans, even worse.  Blisters on the bum, whilst wearing jeans and mustering cattle on a motorbike in a rough paddock?  Indeed...

I did that on the radiator in the teeny bathroom of my first apartment.  Minus the mustering cattle on the motorbike bit, LOL.  It likely wasn't as bad as burning it on a hot wood stove but it made sitting down quite uncomfortable for a time.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: MinAvi on January 06, 2012, 04:16:28 AM
Back in the old farmhouse, we had a wood-burning stove which put out a wonderful amount of heat.  However, overnight, it was banked, so in order to warm up the next morning you needed to stand quite close to it. 

Given that the rest of the house was like an icebox, I would get dressed in front of the stove.  Putting my jeans on one morning, I bent over, only to realise in a very painful way that I was a little TOO close to the stove.  Yeeeeeeeeeeoooooowwwwww!!!!!!

Blisters on the bum make life very awkward.  Blisters on the bum when one has to wear jeans, even worse.  Blisters on the bum, whilst wearing jeans and mustering cattle on a motorbike in a rough paddock?  Indeed...

Musy be an Aussie thing! My little sister did the same thing to the slow combustion heater and left 2 perfect circles on the glass front, one from each cheek. Mum could never get it clean!

Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: zyrs on January 06, 2012, 02:13:55 PM
I just remembered one!

During my hippy years of wearing a hat everywhere I was in a state where prickly pear cactus grew.  I had read that they were tasty, and wanted to try them so went to pick some.  Of course, I used me hat to pick them in.  Then when I got home and dumped them out, I put the hat back on my head...
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jpcher on January 06, 2012, 05:01:34 PM
When you are completely out of toilet paper, you can be proud of yourself for actually remembering to stop at the store on your way home from work to buy TP.

However, you will not feel so proud when you get home and run to the bathroom . . . without bringing said TP with you.


(Shhh. Don't tell anyone. :-[)


 ::)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Mediancat on January 06, 2012, 10:27:56 PM
One time, I was cooking dinner for me and my Dad. First to go in were some oven fries, followed a couple of minutes later by some breaded shrimp. And since the temperature was the same and the fries just took a few minutes longer, we used the same baking pan.

So I pulled the pan out of the oven after a couple of minutes and put the shrimp on it.

As to what happened next, I figure I looked at the pan, saw the uncooked shrimp and the still cold fries, and thought,  "That pan's still cold, I can just pick it up with my bare hands."

No. I couldn't. I had some lovely burns on the tips of the fingers of my left hand for the better part of a week.

Rob
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: ica171 on January 06, 2012, 10:55:46 PM
I haven't finished reading, but I had to contribute my story to the group. 

First of all, I have learned to ALWAYS make sure that I'm LOOKING at the keys in one hand whilst closing the door with the other.   Granted, this is a lot easier if you're not holding children or piles of stuff, but if I can't hold them, I stuff them in that nice space in the middle of my bra so I can at least FEEL them.  Haven't locked myself out since then.

--snip--

I have never locked myself out (that I can remember) but I am obsessed with making sure I have the keys in my hand or in sight (like if DH has them I like to see them). I know the house keys and van keys are on the same ring, and I know that if DH is putting the kids in the van that he has to have the keys, but I still have to ask every time. He probably thinks I'm half-crazy.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jedikaiti on January 06, 2012, 11:03:56 PM
When I was in college, I locked my keys in my car so many times my friends just started holding their doors open until I showed them the keys in my hand. One friend in particular would call out "Missouri!" and I would have to show her the car keys. :-)

*for non-US eHellions, Missouri is known as the "show me" state.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Dazi on January 06, 2012, 11:25:29 PM
I have locked my keys in my car while it was running.  I actually didn't notice until I came out of the grocery store with a cart full of stuff.

I went back inside to put my cart in the back freezer then went to get my assistant to let me in my office to call my DH (yeah, I worked there...and my work keys were on the keychain locked in my car...sigh). 

My DH drives across town only for me to realise I had a spare key in my purse.   ::)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Luci on January 07, 2012, 08:16:45 AM

I have never locked myself out (that I can remember) but I am obsessed with making sure I have the keys in my hand or in sight (like if DH has them I like to see them). I know the house keys and van keys are on the same ring, and I know that if DH is putting the kids in the van that he has to have the keys, but I still have to ask every time. He probably thinks I'm half-crazy.

But we all know that the first time you don't ask is the one time he didn't have the keys.

I have locked my keys in my car while it was running.  I actually didn't notice until I came out of the grocery store with a cart full of stuff.

I went back inside to put my cart in the back freezer then went to get my assistant to let me in my office to call my DH (yeah, I worked there...and my work keys were on the keychain locked in my car...sigh). 

My DH drives across town only for me to realise I had a spare key in my purse.   ::)

One time I locked my keys in the car 25 miles from home. (I had gotten some bad news from the doctor and stopped at McDonald's to calm down as I knew I shouldn't be driving.) I called Lucas, he drove the van all the way over, then found he had brought the motohome keys instead of the SUV keys.

The guy serving papers on the next door neighbor had parked in the driveway, left the car running, locked the keys in the car, served the papers, then realized what he had done. Actually, it looked like the renter was very nice about it and let the server call from the home phone.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: KenveeB on January 07, 2012, 09:41:40 AM

I have never locked myself out (that I can remember) but I am obsessed with making sure I have the keys in my hand or in sight (like if DH has them I like to see them). I know the house keys and van keys are on the same ring, and I know that if DH is putting the kids in the van that he has to have the keys, but I still have to ask every time. He probably thinks I'm half-crazy.

But we all know that the first time you don't ask is the one time he didn't have the keys.

I would always ask my college roommate, and she'd yell at me.  The first time I didn't ask, she locked the keys in the car.

My dad and I were traveling across Europe once, and he used to get annoyed because I always asked him if he had his passport whenever we'd go to a new place.  So I didn't ask when we got on the train to go from Germany to Austria.  Sure enough, he'd left his passport behind.  ::) He got off the train at the next stop, went back to our hotel in Germany (Austria was a day trip), and got his passport, but he missed pretty much the whole trip.  I still don't know how he got back into Germany without his passport.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jpcher on January 07, 2012, 01:50:24 PM
I, too, have locked my keys in my car while the car was still running.

Snowy day after work. I started up my car, turned on the heat and defrost then went to scrape the windows and brush off the car. Once that was done, I tried to open my door . . . ARGH!

Fortunately the security staff was able to use a jimmy-bar(?) type of thing and open my door. I was really glad that it wasn't one of those days that I was running on empty in my gas tank because it took almost an hour for them to get to my car.

I now have a disconnect key chain where I have the ignition key on one end and the remote opener on the other end.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Miss Understood on January 07, 2012, 03:21:38 PM
I have locked my keys in the car while the car was still running and my skirt stuck in the door.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Cutenoob on January 07, 2012, 07:30:01 PM
Today I did a DERP. I wanted to dry my towel on my step stool, it's a good way to air something out. So I draped the towel over the still-folded step stool, then tried to expand/unfold it. I stuck my fingers in a part that moves and caught 4 of my fingers inside the catch where you fold and unfold it. OW. And, well, if the towel hadn't been on it, I would have seen what I was doing. After hollering OWOWOWOW for a bit, I calmed down and released the catch. The fingers still hurt.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: White Dragon on January 07, 2012, 09:32:32 PM
I got a little kitchen mandolin for Christmas and decided to try it out yesterday.

I was just slicing a clove of garlic so clearly it was too small to use the hand guard.

Yeah.
I made the rest of the turkey and stuffing with a very bandaged thumb and only one hand.


edited to replace fun with thumb.  I do not know how one bandages a fun - or even what one is!

I decided to give the mandolin another try today.
Needless to say, I was very careful about what I was doing and where my hands were.

10 minutes later, I called DH into the kitchen.

The look on his face when he took in the mandolin on the counter, me holding my thumb (yes, same thumb) in paper towel and my look of chagrin...

DH says I am "mandolin impaired".
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Elfmama on January 08, 2012, 09:22:45 PM
Whoa! I'm all about raw cookie dough, but raw YEAST dough could get you in serious trouble. :-X

Why?  My kids eat the bread dough all the time! Am I poisoning them?? Eek!
Looks like no one ever answered this one.

A tiny bit of raw yeast dough should not be a problem. The normal stomach acids will kill any yeast.  However, a large amount (as a guess, let's say a chunk any bigger than an egg) can be, especially if you have a kid who will swallow big lumps nearly whole.  A large ball of dough is dense enough that the stomach acids can't reach to the middle of it.  And if you do yeast baking, you know what happens when yeast is in a nice warm place -- it doubles and expands.  A large ball of indigestible bread dough expanding in your stomach is not a comfortable thing...

(Many years ago, in the very early days of 911, there was an American TV program called Emergency.  It drew in part from real-life stories of things that emergency responders had handled.  One was a call from a woman whose teenage son had eaten a whole loaf of raw cinnamon bread dough.  His belly looked like he was pregnant, and his stomach was quite literally near to bursting.) 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Nora on January 09, 2012, 11:10:56 AM
I got a little kitchen mandolin for Christmas and decided to try it out yesterday.

I was just slicing a clove of garlic so clearly it was too small to use the hand guard.

Yeah.
I made the rest of the turkey and stuffing with a very bandaged thumb and only one hand.


edited to replace fun with thumb.  I do not know how one bandages a fun - or even what one is!

I decided to give the mandolin another try today.
Needless to say, I was very careful about what I was doing and where my hands were.

10 minutes later, I called DH into the kitchen.

The look on his face when he took in the mandolin on the counter, me holding my thumb (yes, same thumb) in paper towel and my look of chagrin...

DH says I am "mandolin impaired".

Oh, Hon! Give the evil thing away already!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: WolfWay on January 11, 2012, 12:23:20 AM
My ex-MIL was actually a decent cook but gravy was not her forte.  One evening she made a big bowl of gravy and as we sat down to eat a fly flew over it and dropped dead right in the bowl! Literally it was flying along, healthy and fine, and then just as it flew over the gravy it dropped dead.  We laughed until we cried.  She had a good sense of humor about it and laughed too.  it was a running joke for years.
My Grandpa was not familiar with the inside of kitchen at all. Grandma did ALL the cooking.

Every Sunday the family had a roast dinner and one weekend she was sick in bed, but determined to have the roast dinner nevertheless. So she was organizing a roast dinner from her bed (by sending cooking instructions through the kids). When everything was ready, she came through to eat lunch, and found out she hadn't been specific enough in the instructions for making gravy. Grandpa had followed her every instruction, but she had forgotten to mention adding the gravy powder in, so the "gravy" was a white sauce, rather than an actual brown gravy. At no point in the making of the gravy did Grandpa question the unusual colour of it.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: 8cowwife on January 11, 2012, 10:43:50 PM
I'm with White Dragon.  Mandolins are evil. I have enough problems with a regular cheese grater.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: snowfire on January 12, 2012, 12:18:53 AM
Yup, mandolins are truly carnivorous!  I have the scar on my thumb to prove it...and i was even using the food grabber handle.  My zucchini was a silly millimeter to wide for the mandolin, and it stuck.  Using your thumb to try to work it through is a BAD IDEA. 

The next time I was at the restaurant supply store and saw a kevlar glove for the kitchen, I bought it in a flash.  Love it!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: WolfWay on January 12, 2012, 03:23:52 AM
Had one of those OhNoSeconds when I was trying to open a tin can and I was using a really useless old tin opener. I could only get it to grip and cut into about three quarters of the lid edge and ended up levering up the half removed lid with a butter knife. It wasn't quite enough to get the contents of the tin out, so I thought "I'll just push the lid back a little more with my finger". As I was putting my finger on the tin edge I clearly thought to myself "This is so stupid, I'm likely to cut myself on the sharp edge of the lid!".

Guess what I promptly did?
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: purplemuse on January 12, 2012, 07:17:12 AM
I was scoring the inside of an acorn squash a while back. I was holding the squash in my hand, and drawing the knife across it, toward my thumb.

Just as I thought, "you know, this is probably a bad idea..." the knife slipped and went through my thumb. Fortunately, I hadn't been pressing very hard, and only needed a bandaid.

Mostly I've been lucky though, given that I tend to cut/peel toward myself, which used to freak my mom out. It doesn't feel right the other way though. I just figure that part of my being a lefty was learning a bunch of simple tasks backwards.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: SeptGurl on January 12, 2012, 10:50:31 AM
Another one on keys and in keeping with my earlier post ... I once locked myself in the house. Yes, in the house. Both the front and back doors had deadbolts that had to be locked with a key from both sides. I was in college, and I needed to get to class. I was sure they were in my purse, so I dumped it out. No keys. I wandered all over the house, looking in every possible nook and cranny. I checked the refrigerator, the bathroom, my closet, my shoes, the pockets of all my coats. No keys. I kept going back to my purse and checking it. No keys. Of course, I couldn't have locked the doors if I didn't have the keys, so they had to be in there somewhere.

I decided to climb out a window to get out of the house (I was panicked by that point), but I checked my purse one last time first. The keys fell right out on the couch. From that point on, I have sworn that there is a key ghost that follows me. It also must've been there the day I locked my hand in the car.  ;D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: nalapuppy on January 13, 2012, 09:27:49 AM
Last night, I had the potential to have a very bad experience...luckily it turned out good.  My kids gave me a rotisserie for christmas, and we decided to try it out.  After cooking the pork tenderloin (which turned out fantastic!) I used the special tool to take it out of the rotisserie, but it still had the metal skewer running through it.  Without thinking, I grabbed the skewer with my bare hands. 

For some reason, the metal wasn't super hot.  I am happy to say I wasn't burnt!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: exitzero on January 13, 2012, 10:43:47 AM
Another one on keys and in keeping with my earlier post ... I once locked myself in the house. Yes, in the house. Both the front and back doors had deadbolts that had to be locked with a key from both sides. I was in college, and I needed to get to class. I was sure they were in my purse, so I dumped it out. No keys. I wandered all over the house, looking in every possible nook and cranny. I checked the refrigerator, the bathroom, my closet, my shoes, the pockets of all my coats. No keys. I kept going back to my purse and checking it. No keys. Of course, I couldn't have locked the doors if I didn't have the keys, so they had to be in there somewhere.

I decided to climb out a window to get out of the house (I was panicked by that point), but I checked my purse one last time first. The keys fell right out on the couch. From that point on, I have sworn that there is a key ghost that follows me. It also must've been there the day I locked my hand in the car.  ;D

I once got locked in my apartment, but it wasn't a lack of keys.  The doorknob simply refused to turn. It was STUCK.  I called maintenance, and while waiting for them, got my screwdriver and started to remove the doorknob.  Maintenance arrived and worked on it from his side, until we had a hole in the door.  The deadbolt simply Would Not Move.  (By this time I was laughing so hard that I could barely stand)   So he said, "Stand back", and did the whole 'manly shoulder against the door' thing, and BROKE the door frame!   
I grabbed my purse and said, 'I have to get to work!' and headed off.
The door was fixed when I got back.
That is one of the funniest things that ever happened to me in an apartment.

The same thing happed to me! Except I own my condo, so there was no maintenance to call! I live on the 10th floor, so it wasn't like I could climb out a window. My boyfriend had gone out into the hallway to test the door because it had been acting weird, and then couldn't get bck in. He and neighbor tried everything, and finally ended up just smashing the door knob to pieces.

At one point I called a lock smith and he said, "Is this a lock-out?" I probably puzzled him when I said, "No it's a lock IN"!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: VorFemme on January 13, 2012, 06:46:49 PM
We have one door that is getting stuck like that - I think it is related to settling after a year long drought..................but we do have three other doors into the house (front, side - which is the one that sticks, back, and master bedroom).   But I'm starting to look at getting all new locks for the four doors because the side door has two locks - we don't have the key for the doorknob lock (it is the only door with two locks)............or possibly just replace the door knob with a lock that we have a key for so we can get back in (it is the easiest to get to from the driveway).

I hate wrestling with a stubborn door............
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: kareng57 on January 13, 2012, 07:04:29 PM
Another one on keys and in keeping with my earlier post ... I once locked myself in the house. Yes, in the house. Both the front and back doors had deadbolts that had to be locked with a key from both sides. I was in college, and I needed to get to class. I was sure they were in my purse, so I dumped it out. No keys. I wandered all over the house, looking in every possible nook and cranny. I checked the refrigerator, the bathroom, my closet, my shoes, the pockets of all my coats. No keys. I kept going back to my purse and checking it. No keys. Of course, I couldn't have locked the doors if I didn't have the keys, so they had to be in there somewhere.

I decided to climb out a window to get out of the house (I was panicked by that point), but I checked my purse one last time first. The keys fell right out on the couch. From that point on, I have sworn that there is a key ghost that follows me. It also must've been there the day I locked my hand in the car.  ;D


I believe that this is why many fire departments advise against this type of lock.  They may seem to be extra-secure, but no one wants to be running around looking for keys when they need to exit the house very quickly.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: MinAvi on January 13, 2012, 08:18:27 PM
My sister is coping a beating in this tread, but I am going to tell on her again... (I hope she doesn't ever find this site!)

When she was 8 months pregnant with my nephew she got locked in the bathroom while taking a shower.

Just to set the scene, my sister is 5'1 and had a 11.9 pound baby (HUGE kid) so her preggy belly was HUGE as well. She went to take a shower and as she finished realised that there was no towel. She called for her DH to bring her one. He told her to open the door, but it wasn't locked.... uh oh...

The door has locked closed and they could.not.get.it.open

She ended climbing up the sink, and pulling the louvers out of the teeny tiny bathroom window, 6 foot off the ground. Her DH went outside and caught her as she came though, butt naked, head first.

I would have paid really good money to see that  >:D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: violinp on January 14, 2012, 10:29:40 AM
My sister is coping a beating in this tread, but I am going to tell on her again... (I hope she doesn't ever find this site!)

When she was 8 months pregnant with my nephew she got locked in the bathroom while taking a shower.

Just to set the scene, my sister is 5'1 and had a 11.9 pound baby (HUGE kid) so her preggy belly was HUGE as well. She went to take a shower and as she finished realised that there was no towel. She called for her DH to bring her one. He told her to open the door, but it wasn't locked.... uh oh...

The door has locked closed and they could.not.get.it.open

She ended climbing up the sink, and pulling the louvers out of the teeny tiny bathroom window, 6 foot off the ground. Her DH went outside and caught her as she came though, butt naked, head first.

I would have paid really good money to see that  >:D

Must...not...laugh...
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: GreenEyedHawk on January 14, 2012, 12:02:49 PM
Another one on keys and in keeping with my earlier post ... I once locked myself in the house. Yes, in the house. Both the front and back doors had deadbolts that had to be locked with a key from both sides. I was in college, and I needed to get to class. I was sure they were in my purse, so I dumped it out. No keys. I wandered all over the house, looking in every possible nook and cranny. I checked the refrigerator, the bathroom, my closet, my shoes, the pockets of all my coats. No keys. I kept going back to my purse and checking it. No keys. Of course, I couldn't have locked the doors if I didn't have the keys, so they had to be in there somewhere.

I decided to climb out a window to get out of the house (I was panicked by that point), but I checked my purse one last time first. The keys fell right out on the couch. From that point on, I have sworn that there is a key ghost that follows me. It also must've been there the day I locked my hand in the car.  ;D


I believe that this is why many fire departments advise against this type of lock.  They may seem to be extra-secure, but no one wants to be running around looking for keys when they need to exit the house very quickly.

Just about everyone I know who has this type of lock keeps the key in it (on the inside) at all times so they don't have to go looking in an emergency, but I agree...I don't think these locks are such a good idea.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Pinky830 on January 16, 2012, 08:17:40 PM
I locked myself in the shower room at a youth hostel in Cardiff, Wales. I still don't quite know what happened, I just remember a lot of kerfuffle in the hallway as everyone conferred on how to free the semihysterical American. Did I mention that I not only hate being the center of attention when I've done something dumb, but I'm quite claustrophobic? It was one of the worst moments of my life.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: kareng57 on January 16, 2012, 09:21:43 PM
Another one on keys and in keeping with my earlier post ... I once locked myself in the house. Yes, in the house. Both the front and back doors had deadbolts that had to be locked with a key from both sides. I was in college, and I needed to get to class. I was sure they were in my purse, so I dumped it out. No keys. I wandered all over the house, looking in every possible nook and cranny. I checked the refrigerator, the bathroom, my closet, my shoes, the pockets of all my coats. No keys. I kept going back to my purse and checking it. No keys. Of course, I couldn't have locked the doors if I didn't have the keys, so they had to be in there somewhere.

I decided to climb out a window to get out of the house (I was panicked by that point), but I checked my purse one last time first. The keys fell right out on the couch. From that point on, I have sworn that there is a key ghost that follows me. It also must've been there the day I locked my hand in the car.  ;D


I believe that this is why many fire departments advise against this type of lock.  They may seem to be extra-secure, but no one wants to be running around looking for keys when they need to exit the house very quickly.

Just about everyone I know who has this type of lock keeps the key in it (on the inside) at all times so they don't have to go looking in an emergency, but I agree...I don't think these locks are such a good idea.


My understanding (quite possibly faulty) is that these locks are considered to be better security - the idea being that standard deadbolt locks (with the knob on the inside) could be accessible by burglars breaking the glass and then turning the inside knob.  But if people who have the two-way key lock just keep the key permanently in the inside lock, then there's little difference, isn't there?
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: kethria on January 17, 2012, 08:39:43 AM
Another one on keys and in keeping with my earlier post ... I once locked myself in the house. Yes, in the house. Both the front and back doors had deadbolts that had to be locked with a key from both sides. I was in college, and I needed to get to class. I was sure they were in my purse, so I dumped it out. No keys. I wandered all over the house, looking in every possible nook and cranny. I checked the refrigerator, the bathroom, my closet, my shoes, the pockets of all my coats. No keys. I kept going back to my purse and checking it. No keys. Of course, I couldn't have locked the doors if I didn't have the keys, so they had to be in there somewhere.

I decided to climb out a window to get out of the house (I was panicked by that point), but I checked my purse one last time first. The keys fell right out on the couch. From that point on, I have sworn that there is a key ghost that follows me. It also must've been there the day I locked my hand in the car.  ;D


I believe that this is why many fire departments advise against this type of lock.  They may seem to be extra-secure, but no one wants to be running around looking for keys when they need to exit the house very quickly.

I do know when we rented our townhome the realtor checked and said that if we had that type of lock we would have had to change it because it would be a violation of fire codes in our county.


Just about everyone I know who has this type of lock keeps the key in it (on the inside) at all times so they don't have to go looking in an emergency, but I agree...I don't think these locks are such a good idea.


My understanding (quite possibly faulty) is that these locks are considered to be better security - the idea being that standard deadbolt locks (with the knob on the inside) could be accessible by burglars breaking the glass and then turning the inside knob.  But if people who have the two-way key lock just keep the key permanently in the inside lock, then there's little difference, isn't there?
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: MrTango on January 17, 2012, 08:49:57 AM
Speaking of keys and locks...

I once stepped out of the vehicle we used for campus security in order to grab some paperwork out of the trunk to give to one of our guards (the building where he was working was out of blank forms).  Since it was winter, I didn't bother to shut off the vehicle.

The wind blew the driver's door closed. (no big deal, I've got the remote clipped to my belt).  Nope.  The remote had fallen off my belt when I got out of the car, and I could see it sitting on the driver's seat.

Fortunately, one of the other supervisors was only a few blocks away with another key.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: WhiteTigerCub on January 17, 2012, 11:47:57 AM
Another one on keys and in keeping with my earlier post ... I once locked myself in the house. Yes, in the house. Both the front and back doors had deadbolts that had to be locked with a key from both sides. I was in college, and I needed to get to class. I was sure they were in my purse, so I dumped it out. No keys. I wandered all over the house, looking in every possible nook and cranny. I checked the refrigerator, the bathroom, my closet, my shoes, the pockets of all my coats. No keys. I kept going back to my purse and checking it. No keys. Of course, I couldn't have locked the doors if I didn't have the keys, so they had to be in there somewhere.

I decided to climb out a window to get out of the house (I was panicked by that point), but I checked my purse one last time first. The keys fell right out on the couch. From that point on, I have sworn that there is a key ghost that follows me. It also must've been there the day I locked my hand in the car.  ;D


I believe that this is why many fire departments advise against this type of lock.  They may seem to be extra-secure, but no one wants to be running around looking for keys when they need to exit the house very quickly.

Just about everyone I know who has this type of lock keeps the key in it (on the inside) at all times so they don't have to go looking in an emergency, but I agree...I don't think these locks are such a good idea.


My understanding (quite possibly faulty) is that these locks are considered to be better security - the idea being that standard deadbolt locks (with the knob on the inside) could be accessible by burglars breaking the glass and then turning the inside knob.  But if people who have the two-way key lock just keep the key permanently in the inside lock, then there's little difference, isn't there?

In my area is not illegal to have these kind of locks.

I have windows right next to my door handles so I need these kind of locks to keep safe.  I keep the key on a hook that is out of reach of the window but readily accessible in the event of a fire.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Moray on January 17, 2012, 11:53:15 AM
Don't, in your hurry to scrape the windows, hop into your car, and get to work on time, forget about the large patch of ice that formed on the ground near your passenger side door. You know, that patch of ice that you saw as you pulled in yesterday, thought about salting and then decided not to, because "Hey, I get in the driver's side, so I won't have to be over there at all." Yeah, *that* patch of ice.

You will fall (spectacularly), rip a hole in the knee of the one pair of dress pants you actually like, and be late to work because you had to change.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: KimberlyM on January 17, 2012, 12:14:54 PM
I have a lock like that on my front door as the top half of the door is a window so a deadbolt with a knob is pointless.  We have a hook next to the door out of reach where the key hangs. 

My mom is a tad overly cautious when it comes to security, so I'm used to those, I've never lived anywhere without one. 

As for what not to do...today I discovered keeping a bowl of hardboiled eggs in the fridge next to the raw eggs is not the best plan, especially if you're still half asleep when you throw your breakfast into your briefcase, if you should knock several hardboiled eggs out of the bowl be sure when you put them all back that you've put a cooked egg in your bag or you may end up with raw egg all over your desk when you decide to eat breakfast...
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: alkira6 on January 17, 2012, 12:22:51 PM
Do not take cold medicine in the dark because you don't want the light to wake your DH.  You WILL wind up taking nyquill gelcaps and fight all day to stay awake. Yawning and slurring words is not attractive while teaching...
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Reader on January 17, 2012, 12:58:41 PM
Left my lights on yesterday and came out to a dead battery.  Had to be jumped by a coworker.  Haven't done that in over ten years, so I felt pretty silly.  The kicker was when I was on my second job, and took a break like I always do.  Since I always sit in my car to smoke, I turned the key to listen to the radio, but didn't turn on the car. So I ended up draining what power I had from driving to work to only need a jump again.  Then no one had cables and one of the workers (I clean a manufacturing plant) got a couple of others workers so we could push the car so we could pop the clutch to get it to start.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Sirius on January 17, 2012, 01:01:27 PM
Another one on keys and in keeping with my earlier post ... I once locked myself in the house. Yes, in the house. Both the front and back doors had deadbolts that had to be locked with a key from both sides. I was in college, and I needed to get to class. I was sure they were in my purse, so I dumped it out. No keys. I wandered all over the house, looking in every possible nook and cranny. I checked the refrigerator, the bathroom, my closet, my shoes, the pockets of all my coats. No keys. I kept going back to my purse and checking it. No keys. Of course, I couldn't have locked the doors if I didn't have the keys, so they had to be in there somewhere.

I decided to climb out a window to get out of the house (I was panicked by that point), but I checked my purse one last time first. The keys fell right out on the couch. From that point on, I have sworn that there is a key ghost that follows me. It also must've been there the day I locked my hand in the car.  ;D

I did this once.  My mobile home had double-sided deadbolts in the door, which is great if you live alone and have glass windows in the doors, as I did, not so great if you lose track of where your keys are.  After that incident I had some copies made of the keys, which I hung by the door close enough to grab if I needed to get out fast, but not so close that someone could break the window and reach in and grab it.  (The one that was hung close to floor level turned out to be a bad idea, because my kitten played with it, and you know what happens when a kitten plays with something.  It vanishes.)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Sirius on January 17, 2012, 01:09:09 PM

Just about everyone I know who has this type of lock keeps the key in it (on the inside) at all times so they don't have to go looking in an emergency, but I agree...I don't think these locks are such a good idea.

I felt it was a good idea in my situation - a woman living alone in a mobile home with doors with glass windows in them.  Plus, I lived on the edge of the trailer park which when I moved there was on the edge of town, and although no unsavory characters (that I know of) tried to break in, on at least one occasion a drunk pounded on my door.  I opened a window and asked him what he wanted.  Turned out he had the wrong lot number.  It might be the only situation where such locks are a good idea, though.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Sara Crewe on January 17, 2012, 01:50:27 PM
My insurance company requires me to have deadbolt locks of a certain type as a condition of my contents insurance.  Apparently the other sort are too easy to burst open (allegedly, I'm no expert).

I keep the key in the lock which has the added benefit that no one can use a key to open the door when I am in which I find reassuring.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: alkira6 on January 17, 2012, 01:54:24 PM
My insurance company requires me to have deadbolt locks of a certain type as a condition of my contents insurance.  Apparently the other sort are too easy to burst open (allegedly, I'm no expert).

I keep the key in the lock which has the added benefit that no one can use a key to open the door when I am in which I find reassuring.

I'm required to have one in the garage but nowhere else. Don't know why, but ya gotta do what ya gotta do...
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: snowfire on January 17, 2012, 07:45:17 PM
Yesterday evening my Mom & I had to go up unexpectedly to her cabin to do a winter shut down. (We normally keep it up and running in the winter, but there were some serious water problems that can't be dealt with until it warms up.)

I picked my Mom up at her house and drove to my house to get my overnight bag.  When I was closing the front door I was concerned about the cats getting out and I had my hands full of stuff so I didn't have my keyring in my hand as I usually do.  Just as the door clicked shut I had a sinking feeling.  I checked all my pockets, no keys.  Well, no major problem, my Mom has a key to my house...in her purse....in the locked car...

Hmmmm, I have a key stashed in the garage, I think.  I use the combo pad to open the garage, and search and search and search.  No key.  And drat my efficiency, I had locked the door into the laundry room after I grabbed the cooler out of the garage.

Luckily, it was about the time that DH usually leaves work.  Unfortunately, I had to call him to explain that I had a brain belch and was locked out of both the house and the car, and it was below freezing.  :-[ 

First thing tomorrow I am making sure I have a house key in the garage, and that I have a spare key in my wallet for both the house and the car. (Normally, you CAN'T lock the car key inside the car.  It's electronic.  But a spare door key for the car would have saved me a lot of trouble.)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Miss Understood on January 17, 2012, 09:30:25 PM
Do not take cold medicine in the dark because you don't want the light to wake your DH.  You WILL wind up taking nyquill gelcaps and fight all day to stay awake. Yawning and slurring words is not attractive while teaching...

In a similar vein, don't, when groggy from getting up at 3:30 for a flight, put on earrings in the dark so as not to wake your DH.  You may end up with very different earrings (and people not telling you - what did they think it was a statement?   ???).
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: cabbagegirl28 on January 17, 2012, 11:04:22 PM
I should've bowed out of this movie night, but I'm an important part of the club holding it, so I felt I should go.

Silence of the Lambs is not for a person who can't handle most horror movies. I don't know what I was thinking. Thankfully, I had the good sense to cover my eyes at the bad parts.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Fleur-de-Lis on January 17, 2012, 11:35:20 PM
Do not take cold medicine in the dark because you don't want the light to wake your DH.  You WILL wind up taking nyquill gelcaps and fight all day to stay awake. Yawning and slurring words is not attractive while teaching...

In a similar vein, don't, when groggy from getting up at 3:30 for a flight, put on earrings in the dark so as not to wake your DH.  You may end up with very different earrings (and people not telling you - what did they think it was a statement?   ???).

I don't know about *now*, but I remember that in the 80s it was all the rage to wear a stud earring in one ear and a long drop earring in the other.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Irishkitty on January 18, 2012, 04:16:56 AM
Had to be jumped by a coworker.  Haven't done that in over ten years, so I felt pretty silly. 

 >:D Evil Irish Kitty is ROTFLMAO - that means something else to me entirely... :D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: WolfWay on January 18, 2012, 06:32:18 AM
Had to be jumped by a coworker.  Haven't done that in over ten years, so I felt pretty silly. 

 >:D Evil Irish Kitty is ROTFLMAO - that means something else to me entirely... :D
Ditto.  ;D  Bit like being "knocked up" can have different meanings.  ;)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Mediancat on January 18, 2012, 07:59:33 AM
I can think of three entirely disparate meanings to "being jumped by a coworker": The one in Reader's post, the one Irishkitty is obliquely referring to, or the one where they attack you by surprise.

Rob
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: kethria on January 18, 2012, 08:08:52 AM
Another one on keys and in keeping with my earlier post ... I once locked myself in the house. Yes, in the house. Both the front and back doors had deadbolts that had to be locked with a key from both sides. I was in college, and I needed to get to class. I was sure they were in my purse, so I dumped it out. No keys. I wandered all over the house, looking in every possible nook and cranny. I checked the refrigerator, the bathroom, my closet, my shoes, the pockets of all my coats. No keys. I kept going back to my purse and checking it. No keys. Of course, I couldn't have locked the doors if I didn't have the keys, so they had to be in there somewhere.

I decided to climb out a window to get out of the house (I was panicked by that point), but I checked my purse one last time first. The keys fell right out on the couch. From that point on, I have sworn that there is a key ghost that follows me. It also must've been there the day I locked my hand in the car.  ;D


I believe that this is why many fire departments advise against this type of lock.  They may seem to be extra-secure, but no one wants to be running around looking for keys when they need to exit the house very quickly.

I do know when we rented our townhome the realtor checked and said that if we had that type of lock we would have had to change it because it would be a violation of fire codes in our county.


Just about everyone I know who has this type of lock keeps the key in it (on the inside) at all times so they don't have to go looking in an emergency, but I agree...I don't think these locks are such a good idea.


My understanding (quite possibly faulty) is that these locks are considered to be better security - the idea being that standard deadbolt locks (with the knob on the inside) could be accessible by burglars breaking the glass and then turning the inside knob.  But if people who have the two-way key lock just keep the key permanently in the inside lock, then there's little difference, isn't there?
Wierd my quote got eaten... anyhow as I had typed, when we put our townhome for rent they checked because according to the realtor it was a fire code violation in our county to have these in a rental property.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: purplemuse on January 18, 2012, 08:43:08 AM
Do not take cold medicine in the dark because you don't want the light to wake your DH.  You WILL wind up taking nyquill gelcaps and fight all day to stay awake. Yawning and slurring words is not attractive while teaching...

If you don't mind the taste of the liquid stuff (I like the cherry flavor, myself), you can keep the liquid version of nyquil and the gelcap version of dayquil to make sure you don't confuse the two.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: alkira6 on January 18, 2012, 08:50:13 AM
Do not take cold medicine in the dark because you don't want the light to wake your DH.  You WILL wind up taking nyquill gelcaps and fight all day to stay awake. Yawning and slurring words is not attractive while teaching...



If you don't mind the taste of the liquid stuff (I like the cherry flavor, myself), you can keep the liquid version of nyquil and the gelcap version of dayquil to make sure you don't confuse the two.

Good advice, but the liquid makes me sleep immediately, as in I woke up on the kitchen floor once when I was in my teens..  I was soooo glad when they came out with the gelcaps because the stuff is effective.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Thipu1 on January 18, 2012, 09:14:21 AM
Do not take cold medicine in the dark because you don't want the light to wake your DH.  You WILL wind up taking nyquill gelcaps and fight all day to stay awake. Yawning and slurring words is not attractive while teaching...

In a similar vein, don't, when groggy from getting up at 3:30 for a flight, put on earrings in the dark so as not to wake your DH.  You may end up with very different earrings (and people not telling you - what did they think it was a statement?   ???).

When we were going on vacation I made the mistake of getting dressed in near darkness.  I thought everything was all right until we got to airport security.  When I took off my shoes, I discovered that one sock was purple and the other was brown.  The colors can look identical in low light. 

Oh well, I could say that I was doing it in honor of Dobbie.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Diane AKA Traska on January 18, 2012, 10:34:17 AM
Do not take cold medicine in the dark because you don't want the light to wake your DH.  You WILL wind up taking nyquill gelcaps and fight all day to stay awake. Yawning and slurring words is not attractive while teaching...



If you don't mind the taste of the liquid stuff (I like the cherry flavor, myself), you can keep the liquid version of nyquil and the gelcap version of dayquil to make sure you don't confuse the two.

Good advice, but the liquid makes me sleep immediately, as in I woke up on the kitchen floor once when I was in my teens..  I was soooo glad when they came out with the gelcaps because the stuff is effective.

In the words of John Pinette:  "NyQuil, the coughing, sneezing, aching, how the hell did I wind up on the kitchen floor medicine."
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Shopaholic on January 20, 2012, 01:52:22 AM
For some reason my husband puts leftover food that he doesn't want to put in the refrigerator in the oven.

Last night it was half a pack of Oreo Cakesters, including the foil wrapping and cardboard box.
Which I didn't discover until I pre-heated the oven for baking a pie this morning.

Why, why would someone put a cream-filled cookie in the oven? Why?

(I didn't check because I used the oven last night, and planned on using it again this morning).
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: minky on January 20, 2012, 07:54:09 AM
As for what not to do...today I discovered keeping a bowl of hardboiled eggs in the fridge next to the raw eggs is not the best plan, especially if you're still half asleep when you throw your breakfast into your briefcase, if you should knock several hardboiled eggs out of the bowl be sure when you put them all back that you've put a cooked egg in your bag or you may end up with raw egg all over your desk when you decide to eat breakfast...

Now that I've stopped laughing, let me suggest that you take a permanent marker and write HB in big letters on all of the hardboiled eggs before you put them in the refrigerator.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Diane AKA Traska on January 20, 2012, 07:56:50 AM
As for what not to do...today I discovered keeping a bowl of hardboiled eggs in the fridge next to the raw eggs is not the best plan, especially if you're still half asleep when you throw your breakfast into your briefcase, if you should knock several hardboiled eggs out of the bowl be sure when you put them all back that you've put a cooked egg in your bag or you may end up with raw egg all over your desk when you decide to eat breakfast...

Now that I've stopped laughing, let me suggest that you take a permanent marker and write HB in big letters on all of the hardboiled eggs before you put them in the refrigerator.

Or dye them.  PAAS, not just for Easter anymore.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: exitzero on January 20, 2012, 08:02:25 AM
As for what not to do...today I discovered keeping a bowl of hardboiled eggs in the fridge next to the raw eggs is not the best plan, especially if you're still half asleep when you throw your breakfast into your briefcase, if you should knock several hardboiled eggs out of the bowl be sure when you put them all back that you've put a cooked egg in your bag or you may end up with raw egg all over your desk when you decide to eat breakfast...

Now that I've stopped laughing, let me suggest that you take a permanent marker and write HB in big letters on all of the hardboiled eggs before you put them in the refrigerator.

Or dye them.  PAAS, not just for Easter anymore.

Or spin them, then stop them with a gentle touch. A raw egg will keep spinning, a cooked one will stop completely.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: LB on January 20, 2012, 09:16:14 AM
As for what not to do...today I discovered keeping a bowl of hardboiled eggs in the fridge next to the raw eggs is not the best plan, especially if you're still half asleep when you throw your breakfast into your briefcase, if you should knock several hardboiled eggs out of the bowl be sure when you put them all back that you've put a cooked egg in your bag or you may end up with raw egg all over your desk when you decide to eat breakfast...

Now that I've stopped laughing, let me suggest that you take a permanent marker and write HB in big letters on all of the hardboiled eggs before you put them in the refrigerator.

Or dye them.  PAAS, not just for Easter anymore.

Or spin them, then stop them with a gentle touch. A raw egg will keep spinning, a cooked one will stop completely.

Also, a cooked egg will spin evenly. A raw egg will wobble all over the counter.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Diane AKA Traska on January 20, 2012, 09:28:15 AM
As for what not to do...today I discovered keeping a bowl of hardboiled eggs in the fridge next to the raw eggs is not the best plan, especially if you're still half asleep when you throw your breakfast into your briefcase, if you should knock several hardboiled eggs out of the bowl be sure when you put them all back that you've put a cooked egg in your bag or you may end up with raw egg all over your desk when you decide to eat breakfast...

Now that I've stopped laughing, let me suggest that you take a permanent marker and write HB in big letters on all of the hardboiled eggs before you put them in the refrigerator.

Or dye them.  PAAS, not just for Easter anymore.

Or spin them, then stop them with a gentle touch. A raw egg will keep spinning, a cooked one will stop completely.

Also, a cooked egg will spin evenly. A raw egg will wobble all over the counter.

Oh, you can also toss them against the ceiling.  If the shell cracks, it's hard boiled.  If the egg doesn't come back down, it's raw.

/EvilTraska
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: KimberlyM on January 20, 2012, 10:50:26 AM
Now my office mate is looking at me like I'm crazy...I just snorted trying not to laugh at all that!  Thanks guys!  ;D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jpcher on January 21, 2012, 11:25:09 AM
Yesterday we had a pretty good snowfall. When I left work, I started up my car to warm it up while I went to scrape the windows and clean off the car.

I have a quick-disconnect key chain so that I won't lock myself out of the car any more (previous story). The only key in the car was the ignition key. On the other half, which I tucked securely in my pocket is the electronic-car-open-button-thingy and my house key.

I usually reconnect the key chain when I get back into my car, but decided to leave the other half in my pocket . . . just in case of whatever.

I finally made it home through horrible traffic, bad roads, etc. and had a bunch of stuff to carry inside with me. I took the house key out of my pocket, went inside and put my stuff down, sorting through everything in my hands so that I could reconnect the two pieces of my keychain.

I only had one key. Darn it all! What happened to the other half? I must have dropped it somewhere!

I looked through all the stuff, I looked on the floor, I double/triple checked my pockets.

I went outside (leaving my front door open because I didn't have a house key) looked closely at the fresh snow for something that might look like a splotch where I dropped the keys. I checked my car, it was locked, so I went back inside to get the spare key. Searched my car. No luck. I started thinking "Did I drop it back at work while I was clearing off my car?"

I thought "Maybe if I gently shoveled the snow I might find it." I went back inside in order to get a shovel from my garage.

As I pushed my front door open, I looked down at the door knob.



There were my keys. Hanging in key slot of the door knob.



The really stupid thing? I never even thought about the fact that I had the key to get into my house in the first place. I just knew that my house key was missing. ::)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: White Dragon on January 21, 2012, 11:47:22 AM
Quote

In the words of John Pinette:  "NyQuil, the coughing, sneezing, aching, how the hell did I wind up on the kitchen floor medicine."

It's good that I'm the only one around right now because this is the first thing I've read in age that had me laughing out loud like a loon.
Thanks, I so needed that!!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Outdoor Girl on January 21, 2012, 11:50:14 AM
Or in my case, 'Nyquil, the coughing, sneezing, aching, keep me up all night' medicine.

I have the opposite reaction to the  drug that puts you to sleep.  Nyquil gives me horrendous insomnia.  So does Tylenol (acetominophen).  I'm up the creek if I ever need major painkillers because most of the heavy duty ones have acetominophen in the formulation.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: White Dragon on January 21, 2012, 11:57:51 AM
I got a little kitchen mandolin for Christmas and decided to try it out yesterday.

I was just slicing a clove of garlic so clearly it was too small to use the hand guard.

Yeah.
I made the rest of the turkey and stuffing with a very bandaged thumb and only one hand.


edited to replace fun with thumb.  I do not know how one bandages a fun - or even what one is!

I decided to give the mandolin another try today.
Needless to say, I was very careful about what I was doing and where my hands were.

10 minutes later, I called DH into the kitchen.

The look on his face when he took in the mandolin on the counter, me holding my thumb (yes, same thumb) in paper towel and my look of chagrin...

DH says I am "mandolin impaired".

Oh, Hon! Give the evil thing away already!

Not sure if this is stubborn or stupid, but I gave it another go.

I am pleased (and kind of surprised) to report that I managed to use the mandolin and leave the kitchen with all digits intact. Go me!

What are the odds I can keep my winning streak going? :P
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Sirius on January 21, 2012, 12:04:45 PM
I remember one time digging through my purse trying to find my car keys.  You'd have thought that the fact that the car was running at the time was a clue as to their location.  When I suddenly realized this I felt really dumb, and I just knew my dog was laughing at me.  She just sat there with her nose out the window and pretended not to notice.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: CuriousParty on January 21, 2012, 01:37:32 PM
Just the other day I was frantically patting all of my pockets, glancing around at the counters, looking in my coat pockets, searching for my precious iPhone.

In between glances, I was reading Facebook.

On my iPhone.

Clearly, I need more sleep.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: LB on January 23, 2012, 03:04:41 AM
There has actually been more than one time when I started frantically looking for my phone while I was talking to someone - on my phone.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: WolfWay on January 23, 2012, 06:36:32 AM
Funnily enough, what with all this talk about locking keys in cars, I just had to go rescue a coworker's husband who locked his keys in the boot of his car while standing in a shopping centre parking lot. ;D My good deed for the day.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Julia Mercer on January 23, 2012, 07:53:07 AM
There has actually been more than one time when I started frantically looking for my phone while I was talking to someone - on my phone.

I did that just the other day, I was in the car talking to my sister on my IPhone, while waiting for DF to finish in the car part store, when I decided I wanted to play the ever addicting Monopoly, so I was frantically searching thru my purse, taking everything out, and then just realized, mid conversation, that it would be just a tad difficult to play any games or anything on it, whilst it was in use as a phone, lol!

Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Pinky830 on January 24, 2012, 11:38:06 AM
Back in 1995 when the Internet was young, I was at my brother's house looking over his shoulder while he showed me something on a message board. He picked up the phone and it didn't work. It took us several seconds to realize that it was because since these were the days of 14 kbps dial-up, the computer was currently tying up the phone.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: iradney on January 25, 2012, 05:22:03 AM
There has actually been more than one time when I started frantically looking for my phone while I was talking to someone - on my phone.

Try desperately searching the house for your glasses.

While wearing them.

On your face - because you're blind as a bat without them (this was before I got contacts).

For a full 30 minutes.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Thipu1 on January 25, 2012, 09:27:38 AM
That happens to us all the time.

We also have another stupid thing we do.  One of us will start a conversation and the other will say, 'Wait a minute.  I can't hear you without my glasses'. 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: purplemuse on January 25, 2012, 11:24:23 AM
That happens to us all the time.

We also have another stupid thing we do.  One of us will start a conversation and the other will say, 'Wait a minute.  I can't hear you without my glasses'.

You know, I often feel like I can't hear as well without my glasses on. Not sure why.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Elfmama on January 25, 2012, 11:45:52 AM
For some reason my husband puts leftover food that he doesn't want to put in the refrigerator in the oven.

Last night it was half a pack of Oreo Cakesters, including the foil wrapping and cardboard box.
Which I didn't discover until I pre-heated the oven for baking a pie this morning.

Why, why would someone put a cream-filled cookie in the oven? Why?

(I didn't check because I used the oven last night, and planned on using it again this morning).
To keep the pets from getting them?  If that's the case, have him put them in the microwave, since that doesn't get preheated.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Miss Misha on January 25, 2012, 11:54:44 AM
For some reason my husband puts leftover food that he doesn't want to put in the refrigerator in the oven.

Last night it was half a pack of Oreo Cakesters, including the foil wrapping and cardboard box.
Which I didn't discover until I pre-heated the oven for baking a pie this morning.

Why, why would someone put a cream-filled cookie in the oven? Why?

(I didn't check because I used the oven last night, and planned on using it again this morning).
To keep the pets from getting them?  If that's the case, have him put them in the microwave, since that doesn't get preheated.

Only a person with a husky would come to that conclusion, Elfmama.   ;)  When I do that, I put a sticky note on the oven door so I remember that there is something in the oven before I turn it on.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Midnight Kitty on January 25, 2012, 01:06:24 PM
That happens to us all the time.

We also have another stupid thing we do.  One of us will start a conversation and the other will say, 'Wait a minute.  I can't hear you without my glasses'.

You know, I often feel like I can't hear as well without my glasses on. Not sure why.

Probably because we all tend to do a lot more lip-reading then we realize we do?
I can't hear without my glasses, either.
POD.  I'm more aware of my lip-reading because I know I'm deaf to low tones, especially the low register in which my DH mumbles. ???  If he's looking away from me, I can't discern words, just a rumbling noise.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Shopaholic on January 25, 2012, 02:05:19 PM
For some reason my husband puts leftover food that he doesn't want to put in the refrigerator in the oven.

Last night it was half a pack of Oreo Cakesters, including the foil wrapping and cardboard box.
Which I didn't discover until I pre-heated the oven for baking a pie this morning.

Why, why would someone put a cream-filled cookie in the oven? Why?

(I didn't check because I used the oven last night, and planned on using it again this morning).
To keep the pets from getting them?  If that's the case, have him put them in the microwave, since that doesn't get preheated.

Only a person with a husky would come to that conclusion, Elfmama.   ;)  When I do that, I put a sticky note on the oven door so I remember that there is something in the oven before I turn it on.

LOL. He's been doing that since before we had a dog, but it could be from the years growing up with a Labrador.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: DistantStar on January 25, 2012, 04:05:03 PM
I use the microwave to keep food away from animals.  It gets referred to as the cat-free zone, as right now I am owned by a cat.  I can see the regular oven working fine as a dog-free zone.  Particularly with a lab in the house!  Or a countersurfing Golden!  I've had both and learned quickly not to turn my back on anything I wanted to eat later.   ;D

Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Giggity on January 25, 2012, 04:19:58 PM
My old Dollycat, late former member of the Ferocious Feline Bebop Trio, fiended for bread. My bread lived in the microwave for her entire life.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: blueyzca01 on January 25, 2012, 04:44:11 PM
I got a little kitchen mandolin for Christmas and decided to try it out yesterday.

I was just slicing a clove of garlic so clearly it was too small to use the hand guard.

Yeah.
I made the rest of the turkey and stuffing with a very bandaged thumb and only one hand.


edited to replace fun with thumb.  I do not know how one bandages a fun - or even what one is!

Every time someone talks about a mandolin, I'm picturing someone standing in the kitchen playing the stringed instrument.


Every time someone talks about a mandolin, I shudder.  Violently.  Because the memory is still so fresh, as is the scar.  (right thumb & potatoes).

Repeat after me:  The Guard is Your Friend.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jpcher on January 25, 2012, 04:49:25 PM
Not really a stupid thing that I did . . . more like it was stupid of me not to notice.

Last fall, MIL gave me a really nice winter jacket. I've been wearing it for months!

Today, when I took it off the hanger, I noticed (for the first time) that there was an insignia sewn in on the inside . . . the same insignia that is on the outside, but on the left instead of on the right. I thought this was rather odd. Upon further investigation, I noticed there were pockets on the inside. Upon even further investigation . . . guess what?

My jacket is reversible!

No wonder the zipper pull tab flips completely to the other side (a thing that always irritated me, I was forever flipping it over so that I could zip the jacket.)

And, yes, the inside is a different color/material from the outside. I feel like I just got me a whole new jacket! ;D



I can't believe I've been wearing it for months and never noticed this before.  ::)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: caz on January 26, 2012, 03:13:48 AM
Yay!!  A new jacket!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: CG on January 26, 2012, 09:36:58 PM
When you're at an outdoor concert on roller blades...stop before you hit the cactus.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: cabbagegirl28 on January 26, 2012, 11:52:34 PM
When you're at an outdoor concert on roller blades...stop before you hit the cactus.

Ouch!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Elfmama on January 27, 2012, 01:05:15 PM
For some reason my husband puts leftover food that he doesn't want to put in the refrigerator in the oven.

Last night it was half a pack of Oreo Cakesters, including the foil wrapping and cardboard box.
Which I didn't discover until I pre-heated the oven for baking a pie this morning.

Why, why would someone put a cream-filled cookie in the oven? Why?

(I didn't check because I used the oven last night, and planned on using it again this morning).
To keep the pets from getting them?  If that's the case, have him put them in the microwave, since that doesn't get preheated.

Only a person with a husky would come to that conclusion, Elfmama.   ;)  When I do that, I put a sticky note on the oven door so I remember that there is something in the oven before I turn it on.
(http://www3.telus.net/smile/images/rofl-k2.gif)There wasn't enough room in the oven to keep all the food that Tasha used to get into!  One time DH and I were in the downstairs family room, and heard an odd thumping noise from upstairs.  Though "Oh, carp, someone left the kitchen trashcan out and Tasha's dragged out those chicken bones."  Nope, when we went upstairs to check, trashcan was in the cabinet under the sink where it belonged.  Back downstairs.

Thump, thump, thump.
dingdangity it, she's into something.  She was -- she'd managed to nose open the pantry and dragged out the 10-lb bag of potatoes that had been stuck in there instead of putting them in the bin, and she was in dog heaven.   Most of the remaining potatoes in the bag had toothprints on them, and she'd demolished at least 3 or 4. There were gnawed bits all over the floor. And not on the kitchen floor, either, where they could be cleaned up easily, but on the living-room rug. 

The cats were equally guilty.  Kirk would tear into a box of Twinkies and bite holes in all of them before selecting a victim to devour.  Mist was a starving stray when DD picked him up, so he would taste almost anything.  Produce seemed to be favorites, oddly enough; tomatoes, potatoes and bananas were his special victims.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Sirius on January 27, 2012, 01:19:23 PM
My old Dollycat, late former member of the Ferocious Feline Bebop Trio, fiended for bread. My bread lived in the microwave for her entire life.

Daisy munched on an onion earlier in the week.  The result wasn't pretty.  The onions now live in a cabinet she can't get to.

 (http://i257.photobucket.com/albums/hh202/siriuskitty/Daisy3od.jpg)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Outdoor Girl on January 27, 2012, 01:39:35 PM
I love that picture of Daisy.  Her expression is very much like my own.  'Mess with me at your peril!'

My Peggy is the most food oriented cat I've ever had.  Most of my previous cats would get into something left on the floor, like licking a plate but weren't ones for getting into stuff.  With Peggy, I've lost the better part of a sleeve of Saltines, a bag of chips, some bread.  She's like a dog in that she will eat stuff off of and lick the floor.  Fortunately, my counters are safe because she's too portly to be able to jump up on them.  But the kitchen table isn't!  That's where the chips were.  She hopped up on one of the chairs and then managed to snake around and jump up on the table from there.

Sassy, even though she can jump up on the counters, isn't a food surfer.  My plants, on the other hand...
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: violinp on January 27, 2012, 06:41:45 PM
When the ViolinFamily still had a dog, our Jack Russell puppy ate our sofa. I kid you not.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Nika on January 27, 2012, 06:51:32 PM
When the ViolinFamily still had a dog, our Jack Russell puppy ate our sofa. I kid you not.

I can beat that. My family once had a puppy eat the wall.

Oh, and Elfmama -- my Golden loves loves loves potatoes. She would break into the bags of potatoes all the time. Sometimes we'd let her have one because she is so pathetic and we would feel bad taking it away from her.  ::) In her case, her potato-fever is because she can carry them around in her mouth like a toy for a long time and slowly gnaw on them as she gets hungry.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Midnight Kitty on January 27, 2012, 07:10:02 PM
When the ViolinFamily still had a dog, our Jack Russell puppy ate our sofa. I kid you not.

I can beat that. My family once had a puppy eat the wall.
I had a terrier/spitz mix that got out and mated with a cockapoo and had adorable puppies.  I kept the runt, a sweet 5 pound girl.  Her adult canine teeth came in before her puppy teeth fell out, so she was teething something fierce.  She chewed on the concrete foundation and steps in the garage.  I don't think she swallowed anything, so she didn't eat the foundation, but she did break off lots of little pieces.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: mechtilde on January 27, 2012, 08:31:11 PM
Or in my case, 'Nyquil, the coughing, sneezing, aching, keep me up all night' medicine.

I have the opposite reaction to the  drug that puts you to sleep.  Nyquil gives me horrendous insomnia.  So does Tylenol (acetominophen).  I'm up the creek if I ever need major painkillers because most of the heavy duty ones have acetominophen in the formulation.

I also can't take Nyquil. It gives me the jitters & keeps me up all night. Nice to see I'm not the only one.

Sleeping tablets or sedatives make me completely hysterical too. Which makes it hard if I have to have an unleasant medical procedure...
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Pinky830 on January 27, 2012, 08:34:10 PM
When the ViolinFamily still had a dog, our Jack Russell puppy ate our sofa. I kid you not.

I can beat that. My family once had a puppy eat the wall.

Oh, and Elfmama -- my Golden loves loves loves potatoes. She would break into the bags of potatoes all the time. Sometimes we'd let her have one because she is so pathetic and we would feel bad taking it away from her.  ::) In her case, her potato-fever is because she can carry them around in her mouth like a toy for a long time and slowly gnaw on them as she gets hungry.

I have a client who kept finding potatoes all over the living room. They set up a webcam to figure out what was going on. Their greyhound was ripping open the potato bags and tossing them all over the room.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: GreenEyedHawk on January 27, 2012, 08:44:06 PM
Mambo loves any kind of people food.  I once caught her on the kitchen counter trying to abscond with a plastic bag that still had two buttery rolls left over from dinner the previous might.  If we eat chips (or anything in a package that crinkles) she will try and cram her head in to see what's there.  She LOVES grated cheese and plain potato chips broken up into small bits.  She'll pretty much try to eat anything we're eating.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Sirius on January 27, 2012, 09:06:41 PM
When the ViolinFamily still had a dog, our Jack Russell puppy ate our sofa. I kid you not.

I can beat that. My family once had a puppy eat the wall.

Oh, and Elfmama -- my Golden loves loves loves potatoes. She would break into the bags of potatoes all the time. Sometimes we'd let her have one because she is so pathetic and we would feel bad taking it away from her.  ::) In her case, her potato-fever is because she can carry them around in her mouth like a toy for a long time and slowly gnaw on them as she gets hungry.

My family raised Guide Dog puppies when my younger sister was a teenager, and the first one we got, a male yellow lab, ate a hole in the wall and also chewed up some of the linoleum by his tie-down area.  About the only advantage to this is that my parents got to deduct the cost of repairing these items off their income tax since it was the Guide Dog puppy who had done it.  I took pictures and included copies of receipts for repairs with my parents' tax forms, and it was never questioned.  We also got to deduct the cost of having a new cord put on my electric typewriter when I made the mistake of leaving it close enough for Jared the Chewer to get to it.  Fortunately it wasn't plugged in.  (If the IRS had questioned it, our pictures proved that the hole in the wall was way over the head of even our 18-inch sheltie, and it had obviously taken a lot more muscle than any of our shelties or our beagle had to rip up the linoleum.)   
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Luci on January 28, 2012, 08:42:03 AM
Or in my case, 'Nyquil, the coughing, sneezing, aching, keep me up all night' medicine.

I have the opposite reaction to the  drug that puts you to sleep.  Nyquil gives me horrendous insomnia.  So does Tylenol (acetominophen).  I'm up the creek if I ever need major painkillers because most of the heavy duty ones have acetominophen in the formulation.

I also can't take Nyquil. It gives me the jitters & keeps me up all night. Nice to see I'm not the only one.

Sleeping tablets or sedatives make me completely hysterical too. Which makes it hard if I have to have an unleasant medical procedure...

It's probably the diphenhydromine. It makes me crazy restless. Some nurses looked at like me like I was nuts, but now it seems to be an acceptable sensitivity. I always put it on my list of allergies but they still recommended it last time I left the hospital. (Doxolomine does work - it's in one of the Unisom varieties. Read the label!)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: blue2000 on January 28, 2012, 11:02:26 AM
Or in my case, 'Nyquil, the coughing, sneezing, aching, keep me up all night' medicine.

I have the opposite reaction to the  drug that puts you to sleep.  Nyquil gives me horrendous insomnia.  So does Tylenol (acetominophen).  I'm up the creek if I ever need major painkillers because most of the heavy duty ones have acetominophen in the formulation.

I also can't take Nyquil. It gives me the jitters & keeps me up all night. Nice to see I'm not the only one.

Sleeping tablets or sedatives make me completely hysterical too. Which makes it hard if I have to have an unleasant medical procedure...

It's probably the diphenhydromine. It makes me crazy restless. Some nurses looked at like me like I was nuts, but now it seems to be an acceptable sensitivity. I always put it on my list of allergies but they still recommended it last time I left the hospital. (Doxolomine does work - it's in one of the Unisom varieties. Read the label!)

Diphenhydramine is in sleeping tablets?!? I always feel like I just chugged a pot of coffee with that stuff. I thought that was normal!

Wow. Learn something new every day.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jedikaiti on January 28, 2012, 11:59:28 AM
Or in my case, 'Nyquil, the coughing, sneezing, aching, keep me up all night' medicine.

I have the opposite reaction to the  drug that puts you to sleep.  Nyquil gives me horrendous insomnia.  So does Tylenol (acetominophen).  I'm up the creek if I ever need major painkillers because most of the heavy duty ones have acetominophen in the formulation.

I also can't take Nyquil. It gives me the jitters & keeps me up all night. Nice to see I'm not the only one.

Sleeping tablets or sedatives make me completely hysterical too. Which makes it hard if I have to have an unleasant medical procedure...

It's probably the diphenhydromine. It makes me crazy restless. Some nurses looked at like me like I was nuts, but now it seems to be an acceptable sensitivity. I always put it on my list of allergies but they still recommended it last time I left the hospital. (Doxolomine does work - it's in one of the Unisom varieties. Read the label!)

Diphenhydramine is in sleeping tablets?!? I always feel like I just chugged a pot of coffee with that stuff. I thought that was normal!

Wow. Learn something new every day.

It IS many sleeping tablets.  Not just in, it IS, quite often, the active ingredient.

I tend to have some backwards reactions (ADHD - caffeine doesn't keep me awake, it allows me to sleep!), but diphenhydramine (aka Benadryl here in the US, IIRC) doesn't do a whole lot for me either way. Great decongestant, but if I'm up anyway, I'll stay up, and if I lie down, I'll sleep a little better and faster, but not much. My BF on the other hand, he takes one capsule and he is out. cold. For at least 10 hours.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: amylouky on January 30, 2012, 11:36:30 AM
When the ViolinFamily still had a dog, our Jack Russell puppy ate our sofa. I kid you not.

I can beat that. My family once had a puppy eat the wall.

Our Sadie (boxer/border collie mix with apparently a little billy goat too) ate our BATHROOM. Seriously.
This is strangely thread-relevant, because I stupidly left her in the bathroom since we didn't have a crate for her yet. We came home after a couple of hours to find:
The linoleum peeled up off the floor and shredded.
The wooden vanity chewed to within an inch of its life.
Both doorframes mauled, to about 5' up, and the pocket door itself chewed, scratched, and mutilated so that it wouldn't even open anymore.
This one's the best: a huge hole in the drywall, about 1.5' in diameter.. yes, she ate the wall.

We bought her a crate that day.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Giggity on January 30, 2012, 02:03:18 PM
I may have told this story on EH ... don't think I've done it in this thread, though.

Sometime last year, my fiance came downstairs to find one of his Crocs sitting on the living room floor, with a potato inside it.

Luke the giant kitten loves Crocs, and loves potatoes. We know he did it ... we're just not sure why. Was it some sort of signal, like a "We rise tonight!"? If so, who was he signaling? Bo's right there.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jedikaiti on January 30, 2012, 02:08:39 PM
BF adopted our dog, Pilsner, before we met. I wish I could have known Pilsner as a puppy, as he was both adorable and entertaining. He's still both, but I'm sure you get what I mean.

Apparently, when he was a puppy, he ate an entire big box of crayons. The whole thing.

Apparently, he poo'd rainbows for a few days after that.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: siamesecat2965 on January 30, 2012, 02:20:51 PM
For some reason my husband puts leftover food that he doesn't want to put in the refrigerator in the oven.

Last night it was half a pack of Oreo Cakesters, including the foil wrapping and cardboard box.
Which I didn't discover until I pre-heated the oven for baking a pie this morning.

Why, why would someone put a cream-filled cookie in the oven? Why?

(I didn't check because I used the oven last night, and planned on using it again this morning).
To keep the pets from getting them?  If that's the case, have him put them in the microwave, since that doesn't get preheated.

Only a person with a husky would come to that conclusion, Elfmama.   ;)  When I do that, I put a sticky note on the oven door so I remember that there is something in the oven before I turn it on.
(http://www3.telus.net/smile/images/rofl-k2.gif)There wasn't enough room in the oven to keep all the food that Tasha used to get into!  One time DH and I were in the downstairs family room, and heard an odd thumping noise from upstairs.  Though "Oh, carp, someone left the kitchen trashcan out and Tasha's dragged out those chicken bones."  Nope, when we went upstairs to check, trashcan was in the cabinet under the sink where it belonged.  Back downstairs.

Thump, thump, thump.
dingdangity it, she's into something.  She was -- she'd managed to nose open the pantry and dragged out the 10-lb bag of potatoes that had been stuck in there instead of putting them in the bin, and she was in dog heaven.   Most of the remaining potatoes in the bag had toothprints on them, and she'd demolished at least 3 or 4. There were gnawed bits all over the floor. And not on the kitchen floor, either, where they could be cleaned up easily, but on the living-room rug. 

The cats were equally guilty.  Kirk would tear into a box of Twinkies and bite holes in all of them before selecting a victim to devour.  Mist was a starving stray when DD picked him up, so he would taste almost anything.  Produce seemed to be favorites, oddly enough; tomatoes, potatoes and bananas were his special victims.

I KNOW this has been posted before, but I had to again - the potato story sooo reminded me of this: http://littera-abactor.livejournal.com/7748.html
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Diane AKA Traska on January 30, 2012, 04:11:58 PM
I may have told this story on EH ... don't think I've done it in this thread, though.

Sometime last year, my fiance came downstairs to find one of his Crocs sitting on the living room floor, with a potato inside it.

Luke the giant kitten loves Crocs, and loves potatoes. We know he did it ... we're just not sure why. Was it some sort of signal, like a "We rise tonight!"? If so, who was he signaling? Bo's right there.

Off topic... when'd you change your name?!

I'm the last to know everything.  ::Kicks pebble::
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Tierrainney on January 30, 2012, 04:46:44 PM
BF adopted our dog, Pilsner, before we met. I wish I could have known Pilsner as a puppy, as he was both adorable and entertaining. He's still both, but I'm sure you get what I mean.

Apparently, when he was a puppy, he ate an entire big box of crayons. The whole thing.

Apparently, he poo'd rainbows for a few days after that.

Oh dear, our dog did something similar to this once. My brother had a July birthday, so he would usually have an outdoor birthday party with slip n slide and water balloons. The year we got the dog, my father sent us out to pick up the back yard after the party. He was astonished to have return in minutes claiming there was nothing to pick up. He didn't believe us and went to check. There was nothing in the yard then. But we found all the bits and pieces of water balloons later in the dog poop!

This dog had an iron stomach and teeth. He also chewed through the wiring connecting the air conditioning to the house multiple times without getting electrocuted.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Giggity on January 30, 2012, 05:02:39 PM
I may have told this story on EH ... don't think I've done it in this thread, though.

Sometime last year, my fiance came downstairs to find one of his Crocs sitting on the living room floor, with a potato inside it.

Luke the giant kitten loves Crocs, and loves potatoes. We know he did it ... we're just not sure why. Was it some sort of signal, like a "We rise tonight!"? If so, who was he signaling? Bo's right there.

Off topic... when'd you change your name?!

I'm the last to know everything.  ::Kicks pebble::

Month, maybe two months ago? Not too long ... you didn't miss much.  ;D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jedikaiti on January 30, 2012, 05:40:35 PM
I KNOW this has been posted before, but I had to again - the potato story sooo reminded me of this: http://littera-abactor.livejournal.com/7748.html

I loooooooooooove that story.

Quick Threadjack, for those needing more humor in their day:

Dogs in Elk (http://jerrypournelle.com/reports/jerryp/dogsinelk.html)

And for the feline lovers: The Flying Mouse Affair
Part I (http://heresluck.dreamwidth.org/310847.html)
Part II (http://heresluck.dreamwidth.org/319547.html)

This concludes today's threadjack. Enjoy!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: moekosowl on January 30, 2012, 07:18:04 PM
I may have told this story on EH ... don't think I've done it in this thread, though.

Sometime last year, my fiance came downstairs to find one of his Crocs sitting on the living room floor, with a potato inside it.

Luke the giant kitten loves Crocs, and loves potatoes. We know he did it ... we're just not sure why. Was it some sort of signal, like a "We rise tonight!"? If so, who was he signaling? Bo's right there.
TheRevenant, Luke is apparently not the only cat that puts potatoes in shoes...Winston did it once too. I was getting dressed for work when I found a potato with fang marks in my left sneaker.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Giggity on January 30, 2012, 07:21:14 PM
WHEN WAS IT? Maybe they were coordinating!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: moekosowl on January 30, 2012, 07:52:56 PM
It was this year, I think a week or two weeks ago?
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: violinp on January 30, 2012, 08:11:56 PM
From the 2 weeks Mom was away on a trip, and it was just me and Dad:

1. When making shells and cheese, don't rest your arm on the rim of the pot you're cooking the pasta in. It will only end in pain.

2. When you are laying down 1600 pounds of concrete, it might be better to not do it all in one day, for the reason mentioned in making shells and cheese. (My dad is either awesome or crazy. Probably crazy - awesome.)

From last weekend, when Mom and Dad were up in CollegeTown to get Cabbage her car:

1. Don't read this article (http://www.cracked.com/article_16998_5-horrific-serial-killers-who-are-free-right-now.html?wa_user1=2&wa_user2=Weird+World&wa_user3=article&wa_user4=flashback) right before you go to bed all alone in a very creaky, old house. You will spend the rest of the night gripping your pocket knife and checking the locks on everything.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Elfmama on January 30, 2012, 08:49:06 PM
I KNOW this has been posted before, but I had to again - the potato story sooo reminded me of this: http://littera-abactor.livejournal.com/7748.html

I loooooooooooove that story.

Quick Threadjack, for those needing more humor in their day:

Dogs in Elk (http://jerrypournelle.com/reports/jerryp/dogsinelk.html)

And for the feline lovers: The Flying Mouse Affair
Part I (http://heresluck.dreamwidth.org/310847.html)
Part II (http://heresluck.dreamwidth.org/319547.html)

This concludes today's threadjack. Enjoy!
It's not a threadjack! Look at the topic -- Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.  Obviously, what one should not do is leave root vegetables and flying meese in the reach of our household pets.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: moekosowl on January 31, 2012, 03:47:50 AM
From the 2 weeks Mom was away on a trip, and it was just me and Dad:

1. When making shells and cheese, don't rest your arm on the rim of the pot you're cooking the pasta in. It will only end in pain.

*le snip*
OWWWWWWWW. You have my sympathies.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Gyburc on January 31, 2012, 08:11:26 AM
Following on from 'things you really shouldn't leave within reach of your pets', we have discovered the hard way that our ducks and geese are addicted to polystyrene boxes and will happily demolish them little by little. I'm not sure if they are actually ingesting the polystyrene, or just reducing it to little bits. 

The geese definitely do eat black plastic bin-bags. I've heard that chickens will eat plastic shopping bags as well. No idea why!

Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: JolieFille on January 31, 2012, 10:46:42 AM
If you have a small poodle mutt that you know is related to a Hoover vaccum, don't leave the large box of fruit snacks down. She will eat the whole box. The box that was bigger then her. You will then learn that hydrogen peroxide works to make dogs throw up. Thats what the emergency vet said to give her.. Of course this is the same dog that got s concussion. Over French fries.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jedikaiti on January 31, 2012, 03:39:46 PM
If you have a small poodle mutt that you know is related to a Hoover vaccum, don't leave the large box of fruit snacks down. She will eat the whole box. The box that was bigger then her. You will then learn that hydrogen peroxide works to make dogs throw up. Thats what the emergency vet said to give her.. Of course this is the same dog that got s concussion. Over French fries.

My friends had a dog we called Garbage Gut. He was quite large, even for a Golden Retriever, and would eat ANYTHING.

They learned quickly to tell all visitors to keep bags securely closed & out of reach. He could & did go digging through suitcases. He once unzipped a purse and dug out a bottle of prescription stimulants (he opened the bottle, but thankfully did NOT ingest any)! He was quite an education for the vet - after he ate a few antidepressant pills a guest had in their bag, the vet had to make some calls and do some research before calling my friend back to say "Good news - Garbage Gut just won't be depressed for a few days."* Eating a week's worth of vitamins for 2 adult humans was a bigger problem, however. That was how I learned (second hand) that, in the event of a poisoning, a big dose of salt can induce upchucking**, and that, should salt fail, a very very tiny amount of hydrogen peroxide should do it. Very tiny.

Awesome dog, but he had NO natural survival instincts - not when it came to anything he could get his mouth on!

*Not that I've ever heard of a depressed Golden, mind you.

** Think Daniel Craig as James Bond in Casino Royale.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Elfmama on January 31, 2012, 03:58:32 PM
One Xmas DD#2 left her stocking down where Tasha could reach it.  Tasha not only chewed the stocking up so  that she could eat all of the Hershey Kisses in it, but also found the Hershey Kiss Xmas ornaments on the tree that my mother gave the girls the Xmas before.  They smelled like chocolate, looked just like the Kisses that she'd just eaten (only larger) so she pulled one off the tree and chewed that up too. ::) Idiot dog.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: kherbert05 on January 31, 2012, 10:45:52 PM
This one is my Dad's..

I was around 6 years old when this happened.  My parents wanted to watch one of the Star Wars movies so we were getting all settled in with popcorn and pajamas to watch.  My dad went to put the oil in the cast iron pot to pop the popcorn and decided he had to time to go shave while he waited on the oil to heat up.  He was humming to himself when he noticed the orange glow from the corner of his eye.  The oil had gone beyond hot and caught fire.  He ran into the kitchen and not knowing what else to do, grabbed the pot and slung it to the floor... cue the fire spreading to the linoleum.  My mom had 3 Tupperware containers on the counter at the time.  The small one held sugar, the medium one held flour and the large one held....Cheerios (my dad's favorite cereal)  He grabbed what he thought was the flour to drown the flames but grabbed the Cheerios instead.  Wheat is flammable...
Mom had us kids in the yard and was shouting instructions to my dad through the kitchen window and he finally got the fire out.  -- a month later, my mom had that new kitchen she had been wanting...  :P :o
Your Dad was lucky. My parents were making Popcorn in August just before we moved. It caught fire.


Mom the Chemist took it off the burner and put a cover on it to smother it.


Dad - not a scientist grabbed it off the stove and tried to run out of the house with it. (he thought it could explode). He tripped. Started screaming in pain.


Mom yelled at me to run outside. She called neighbors. Medical type* neighbors got them to the hospital. Non medical types cleaned up the kitchen. Teenager was put in charge of me in the back yard. I asked what happened and the teenager told me. It got to hot and the popcorn caught fire.


Mom came home - don't remember if they kept Dad. He had burns all down his left arm/hand and left leg. 2nd maybe also 3rd.


For years I would scream in terror, then just leave any house that was popping corn. Then I would be ok with it. Then I would get all hysterical again.


One of my cousins figured out I got upset when it was hot outside. In my kid logic brain I thought "It got to hot" meant the Houston weather - not the temp of the stove.

*Kind of interesting in a sociological way. The women were all medical researchers/nurses they got Dad to the hospital. It was their husbands that took care of Sis and me and cleaned up the house. We kids used to really throw the teachers for a loop. They would start in on how "women can be scientist too" - like it was a big revelation. We would look at them like they were "revealing" the sky was blue and tell the of course women were scientists they bossed the doctors around - and did the math for the Dads.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Shopaholic on January 31, 2012, 10:58:59 PM
My friend's husband decided to surprise her and make dinner.
The pot he was cooking in caught fire, so he threw it out their third story window into the rain.

As far as he was concerned the pot could have stayed there, so my friend got to go find it and clean it up. It was a good pot :).
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: JolieFille on February 01, 2012, 12:23:47 AM
If you have a small poodle mutt that you know is related to a Hoover vaccum, don't leave the large box of fruit snacks down. She will eat the whole box. The box that was bigger then her. You will then learn that hydrogen peroxide works to make dogs throw up. Thats what the emergency vet said to give her.. Of course this is the same dog that got s concussion. Over French fries.

My friends had a dog we called Garbage Gut. He was quite large, even for a Golden Retriever, and would eat ANYTHING.

They learned quickly to tell all visitors to keep bags securely closed & out of reach. He could & did go digging through suitcases. He once unzipped a purse and dug out a bottle of prescription stimulants (he opened the bottle, but thankfully did NOT ingest any)! He was quite an education for the vet - after he ate a few antidepressant pills a guest had in their bag, the vet had to make some calls and do some research before calling my friend back to say "Good news - Garbage Gut just won't be depressed for a few days."* Eating a week's worth of vitamins for 2 adult humans was a bigger problem, however. That was how I learned (second hand) that, in the event of a poisoning, a big dose of salt can induce upchucking**, and that, should salt fail, a very very tiny amount of hydrogen peroxide should do it. Very tiny.

Awesome dog, but he had NO natural survival instincts - not when it came to anything he could get his mouth on!

*Not that I've ever heard of a depressed Golden, mind you.

** Think Daniel Craig as James Bond in Casino Royale.


My other dog ate an entire purse to get to my lipgloss. Ate through the zipper, then decided hey, this lipgloss was yummy .. the phone looks good too, and so do those headphones. . . I was NOT amused. My phone survived. I just had to get new headphones.

My Shasta doggie dug through my mom's purse and ate all the halloween candy she'd pillaged from me. Wrappers and sticks and all. Shasta was lucky it was all hard candies and not chocolate.

When my poodle mutt got her concussion, it was the most heartbreaking, and hysterical thing at the same time. She fell on the stairs and hit her head really really hard. I've never heard a dog scream and never want to again. She put her little paws on her head and just cried. We picked her up and brought her inside and there wasn't any blood or anything but fifteen minutes later she tried to jump on the couch. And failed miserably. Mom freaked out and took her to the emergency vet where they said what was wrong, and gave her pain pills and whatever it is you give someone who has a concussion. She's fine now. That happened years ago.  But it broke my heart to hear her cry like that.

She's amazingly accident prone to be honest. She's fell down the steps at least three or four times before mom got creative with a sharpie and drew patterns on them so she could differentiate them. And three months ago she had a giant bruise/scrape on her tummy. She never cried or anything and we felt absolutely horrible when we went to pet her and saw it. I think she's used to getting held for someone to put disinfectant on her various scrapes and mishaps.

Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Midnight Kitty on February 01, 2012, 02:08:27 AM
She's amazingly accident prone to be honest.
My mare is a complete klutz.  She has tripped over the shadow from an overhead telephone wire.  She has tripped on her own feet (I wonder if 4 feet is too many for her to keep track of).  She once bucked herself off her feet and managed to catch a slack wire on her nose, cutting down to the bone.  24 stitches.  Most recently, she banged up the inside of both front and rear legs on the left side so badly she was limping for 2 weeks.  We examined the wounds and asked each other, "How the heck did she get hoof marks on the inside of her legs?  She had to have done it to herself because there's no way any other horse would get it's hoof in there.  It's not like they're playing soccer in the pasture."

I always heard that Quarter Horses were surefooted.  Not this one ... :-[
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: gemma156 on February 01, 2012, 04:30:06 AM
Ohh I got one, don't whiz on the electric fence.  By the screaming and yelling of one of my friends it's a really painfull expeirence.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Redsoil on February 01, 2012, 04:40:14 AM
*Currently giggling like a loon a that one!*  ^
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Gyburc on February 01, 2012, 05:09:14 AM
Oh lord, that reminded me...

Women! If you're in the woods at night and need to go to the loo, take a torch and watch out for nettles. Eeeek.

 ;D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Vall on February 01, 2012, 08:30:29 AM
I've done so many stupid things that it's hard to know where to begin.  I really am an intelligent person but you certainly can't tell when it comes to domestic things---especially cleaning issues.

In my 30's I was single and working a lot of overtime.  I didn't do domestics very well so I paid a friend of mine to clean my apartment for me.  She liked the extra money and it worked great for us.  Usually she did the apartment while I was at work.  One day, I was home so I thought I'd help her clean the bathroom.  The walls and floor were tile.  So I sprayed everything down with the cute little scrubbing bubbles.  Then I got the *great* idea that it would be easier to rinse everything if I used the handheld shower thingy.  I had it on full blast and I had great water pressure.  By the time Friend made it to the bathroom, everything was drenched and covered in scrubbing bubbles (including me) and the water had flooded the bathroom and had soaked some of the carpet in the hallway.  Of course I lived in an upstairs apartment.  My friend pleaded with me to never try to help her again.

She wasn't the first or last person to ask me not to try to do domestic things.  My DH prefers that I not try to clean or cook (ruined microwave, ruined food, ruined cookware, various appliances catching on fire, etc)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Outdoor Girl on February 01, 2012, 08:33:40 AM
Oh lord, that reminded me...

Women! If you're in the woods at night and need to go to the loo, take a torch and watch out for nettles. Eeeek.

 ;D

Not personally, but watch out for poison ivy, too!  Especially if you are going all woodsy and using leaves as toilet paper.

Guy who worked with my Dad at summer camp did this.  The only relief he got was sitting in the leftover oatmeal from breakfast.

(Hmmm... maybe I should cross post this in the gross out thread?)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Dr. F. on February 01, 2012, 09:10:16 AM
Oh lord, that reminded me...

Women! If you're in the woods at night and need to go to the loo, take a torch and watch out for nettles. Eeeek.

 ;D

And snakes. We were both very startled.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Outdoor Girl on February 01, 2012, 09:12:58 AM
^ And moose!

I decided I didn't really need to go that badly.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Giggity on February 01, 2012, 09:39:57 AM
Oh Lordy. I've gotten a nettle sting or two for not wearing socks, and it's bad enough on the ankle. Oh LORD.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Thipu1 on February 01, 2012, 09:46:34 AM
^ And moose!

I decided I didn't really need to go that badly.

Excuse me but, if I encountered a moose, I WOULD have to go that badly. 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Outdoor Girl on February 01, 2012, 09:54:27 AM
LOL.  Yeah, I just waited for a few minutes.  I could tell by the crashing noises in the bush that I'd scared him just about as much as he'd scared me.  Once he'd cleared out, off I went again.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jedikaiti on February 01, 2012, 12:41:19 PM
My other dog ate an entire purse to get to my lipgloss. Ate through the zipper, then decided hey, this lipgloss was yummy .. the phone looks good too, and so do those headphones. . . I was NOT amused. My phone survived. I just had to get new headphones.

My Shasta doggie dug through my mom's purse and ate all the halloween candy she'd pillaged from me. Wrappers and sticks and all. Shasta was lucky it was all hard candies and not chocolate.

When my poodle mutt got her concussion, it was the most heartbreaking, and hysterical thing at the same time. She fell on the stairs and hit her head really really hard. I've never heard a dog scream and never want to again. She put her little paws on her head and just cried. We picked her up and brought her inside and there wasn't any blood or anything but fifteen minutes later she tried to jump on the couch. And failed miserably. Mom freaked out and took her to the emergency vet where they said what was wrong, and gave her pain pills and whatever it is you give someone who has a concussion. She's fine now. That happened years ago.  But it broke my heart to hear her cry like that.

She's amazingly accident prone to be honest. She's fell down the steps at least three or four times before mom got creative with a sharpie and drew patterns on them so she could differentiate them. And three months ago she had a giant bruise/scrape on her tummy. She never cried or anything and we felt absolutely horrible when we went to pet her and saw it. I think she's used to getting held for someone to put disinfectant on her various scrapes and mishaps.

Maybe we need a "Stupid Stuff Your Dog's Done" thread. :-)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Diane AKA Traska on February 01, 2012, 03:40:56 PM
My other dog ate an entire purse to get to my lipgloss. Ate through the zipper, then decided hey, this lipgloss was yummy .. the phone looks good too, and so do those headphones. . . I was NOT amused. My phone survived. I just had to get new headphones.

My Shasta doggie dug through my mom's purse and ate all the halloween candy she'd pillaged from me. Wrappers and sticks and all. Shasta was lucky it was all hard candies and not chocolate.

When my poodle mutt got her concussion, it was the most heartbreaking, and hysterical thing at the same time. She fell on the stairs and hit her head really really hard. I've never heard a dog scream and never want to again. She put her little paws on her head and just cried. We picked her up and brought her inside and there wasn't any blood or anything but fifteen minutes later she tried to jump on the couch. And failed miserably. Mom freaked out and took her to the emergency vet where they said what was wrong, and gave her pain pills and whatever it is you give someone who has a concussion. She's fine now. That happened years ago.  But it broke my heart to hear her cry like that.

She's amazingly accident prone to be honest. She's fell down the steps at least three or four times before mom got creative with a sharpie and drew patterns on them so she could differentiate them. And three months ago she had a giant bruise/scrape on her tummy. She never cried or anything and we felt absolutely horrible when we went to pet her and saw it. I think she's used to getting held for someone to put disinfectant on her various scrapes and mishaps.

Maybe we need a "Stupid Stuff Your Dog's Done" thread. :-)

It's called "Google"  :D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Leafy on February 01, 2012, 04:54:47 PM
Oh lord, that reminded me...

Women! If you're in the woods at night and need to go to the loo, take a torch and watch out for nettles. Eeeek.

 ;D

And snakes. We were both very startled.

Also, if you are on an incline, make sure both your feet are uphill from the 'stream'.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: siamesecat2965 on February 01, 2012, 07:43:56 PM
Oh lord, that reminded me...

Women! If you're in the woods at night and need to go to the loo, take a torch and watch out for nettles. Eeeek.

 ;D

And snakes. We were both very startled.

Also, if you are on an incline, make sure both your feet are uphill from the 'stream'.

Additionally if you happen to be wearing "Dr. Denton pjs" the one piece zip up with feet, don't just pull the back flap down and squat, because you WILL pee all down the leg.  it was not pretty, and not fun.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: mbbored on February 01, 2012, 10:59:34 PM
The final part was not me, but I was a full participant in the first.

Imagine, 2000 sparklers tied together. Imagine lighting just one of them. Imagine the explosion that followed. Imagine showing your manhood by peeing on not quite extinguished explosives. Imagine some very sensitive chemical burns.

Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Elfmama on February 02, 2012, 12:31:43 AM
Did he have a 'manhood' left to show?  >:D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Gyburc on February 02, 2012, 06:09:18 AM
Oh Lordy. I've gotten a nettle sting or two for not wearing socks, and it's bad enough on the ankle. Oh LORD.

Let's just say, after the initial pain there is a tingling sensation that goes on for at least an hour. Weirdest thing.

 ;D


Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Thipu1 on February 02, 2012, 09:18:26 AM
This is mild but we still laugh about it. 

Mr. Thipu's makes a dynamite hummus.  It's not a secret but he's never written it down.

One day, I was off work and we were going to have hummus as part of our dinner.  I phoned him and asked for the recipe. He said he'd email it to me and did.  Unfortunately, he hit the wrong button and sent it to virtually everyone in his company. 

Mr. Thipu is known to be a conservative sort who does not forward frivolous  things, so this was a surprise to the recipients.  He received a gentle email from his boss, 'Sounds delicious, Mr. Thipu but why are you spreading the gospel of hummus?' 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: AuntieA on February 03, 2012, 01:34:01 AM
Oh My, I should be in the hall of fame for stupid people tricks.

1. While outside my front door, using my rusty hedge clippers to trim back the evil shrub that almost completely blocks my door in the summer (not safe when you're coming home from work at 2330). Wind from the patio door, which I had opened to go out to the shed to fetch the clippers, blew the front door closed. I had the doorknob lock locked. No biggie, right? I could just go around to my yard and get back in the patio window. Unfortunately, the gate into my yard was locked with a padlock. On the inside. I had to squeeze my 5'7" 190+lb. self  through a teenytinyonlyaskinnycatcouldfitthrough gap in my huge monster hedge to get into my own yard. In addition to imagining myself stuck in there for days before the groundsmen came to mow the common lawn, I got really torn up by the branches.

2.  BF and I on vacation in a resort on the gulf coast of Mexico - northeast of Merida. First night there we used a lock thingy I had bought that slips between the tongue of the lock and the inside jamb of the door. Great until the tropical rainstorm during the night, which caused the (beach-facing and exposed) wooden door to swell. BF managed to call out from the 2nd-floor balcony and I explained to the worker who responded what the problem was. They had to take the door off its hinges! We paid about $75 USD for the repair, the staff got a huge kick out of the whole thing, and we became their favorite Canadian guests because we were able to laugh at ourselves and we offered upfront to cover any damages/labor costs.

3. Costa Rica this rime - again in a second-floor room with a balcony. BF had gone to walk on the beach, and I had been out on the balcony in a bathrobe, painting my nails. The balcony door self-locked when pushed shut (we did not know this). Fortunately, I caught the attention of a nice Italian family on one of the ground-floor units who heard me calling, "Ayudarme, por favor!" Mamma  Italian (thank goodness the family was multilingual) called the maid, then she went with the maid to my room to make sure I was safe once back inside.

4.  Christmas dinner 2004. BF and I were cooking it at my apartment, and my mother came over. Turkey - cooking wonderfully. BF could not seem to get the asparagus to the right shade of done-ness by steaming, and was cussing about that. Mother was well into her cups, and feeling no pain. I had in the oven, in addition to the turkey (covered), a covered Anchor Hocking baking dish of our family's ultra-rich potato casserole and a covered casserole of stuffing. BF turned the heat up on the oven to help the turkey cook faster, and shortly after we heard a boom! from the oven. Seems Anchor Hocking casserole dishes aren't heatproof enough for prolonged baking at moderately high heat. Thank goodness it was only the lid that exploded, and thank goodness the other two items were covered! No potatoes that Christmas.

There are probably a lot more. I inherited a klutz gene from my father.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: BabylonSister on February 10, 2012, 01:00:13 PM
Don't put your cell phone in the back pocket of your jeans and then sit on the toilet.


Thank goodness it was a cheap used cell phone. It had replaced the one from "Don't let your kid carry the cloth bag that contains your phone and plop it brutally on the cement porch." Which was also an old used one because the previous was the victim of "Don't handle your cell phone near a coffee cup."


My new (used) cell phone will arrive soon. I wonder what fate will await it.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Harriet Jones on February 10, 2012, 04:15:21 PM
Don't put your cell phone in the back pocket of your jeans and then sit on the toilet.

Same goes for any hat you might tuck into the back of your waistband.  :P
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jpcher on February 10, 2012, 04:52:43 PM
Don't put your cell phone in the back pocket of your jeans and then sit on the toilet.

Same goes for any hat you might tuck into the back of your waistband.  :P

Same goes for your car keys with a fancy-shmancy key chain that you like to dangle out of your pocket, just for show . . . especially when the toilet is super-powered-self-flush.

Yeah. And don't expect your husband not to laugh at you when you call him for a spare set of keys.

Especially! Don't tell your CWs about what just happened when they are listening to the talk show on the radio about the stupidest thing you've ever done. They will goad you into calling the radio station . . . you will be on air.


Wow! that was about 15 years ago . . . Thanks for the memories! ;D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: princessdolly on February 10, 2012, 04:53:46 PM
A number of year ago, I didn't know if a burner on the electric stove was not or not.  So I put my hand on it.

Yes, it was hot.....

I feel your pain. I still maintain that the cooker hypnotised me... ;)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: princessdolly on February 10, 2012, 05:34:51 PM
Also, once when I was in high school I decided that it would be nice to light a tealight in my oil-burner (w/o the oil) to help me relax and sleep. Fastforward several hours and I wake up to the entire burner aflame. I reach over and touch it for some reason, burning my hand. I blow at it but this seems to fan the flames. After thinking it over I then decide to GO BACK TO SLEEP. It was out in the morning...
I think I might have been half sleep-walking/firefighting (I usually remember some things that happen).
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: alkira6 on February 11, 2012, 09:09:09 PM
Also, once when I was in high school I decided that it would be nice to light a tealight in my oil-burner (w/o the oil) to help me relax and sleep. Fastforward several hours and I wake up to the entire burner aflame. I reach over and touch it for some reason, burning my hand. I blow at it but this seems to fan the flames. After thinking it over I then decide to GO BACK TO SLEEP. It was out in the morning...
I think I might have been half sleep-walking/firefighting (I usually remember some things that happen).

Um, wow, glad you're alive?  :o  I have no idea how to respond to that otherwise.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: White Dragon on February 12, 2012, 04:38:44 PM
Well, I ate the meatballs (why does that sound eerily like "I drank the kool-aid?"), but I still don't know if they were bad or not.
It's like this...

Last Wednesday, I started to feel ill at work. I was pretty sure I was coming down with a fever (aches, chills etc). By the time I got home, I felt pretty poorly, but thought I'd be okay to go to work if it didn't get worse.

As the night progressed, symptoms started to dogpile on me and it became clear that I would *not* be going into work the next day. By the time I realized this - about 3 am - I started to remember Important Time Sensitive Information (ITSI) that uberboss really needed for Thursday. Decisions had to be made, Direction had to be given.

Finally, about 5am I dragged myself out of bed and down to my computer. I seem to recall my reasoning being that an email would be more clear than a phone call - and that boss might figure that if I could call in all this information, I'm obviously lucid enough to come to work.
It's 5 am, and although our den is not near any bedroom, I really don't feel up to bright lights, so I turn on the itty bitty desk lamp. At this time, I suspect that if you'd stapled a temperature sensor to my forehead, it would probably be the brightest thing in the room, myself included.
I tried to compose the email, only find that my mouse isn't working. It's not working because one of the kids borrowed the laptop and, for reasons unknown, removed the dongle for the wireless mouse.
It's 5 am. It's very dark. I'm very feverish.
And I am *not* running around the house looking for random computer peripherals.
So I used the track pad, which I am horrible at under good circumstances. Typing and formatting suffered.

I composed the email, checked it for content, and sent it. Yeah, there were a few typos.
Boss must have gotten it, because he didn't call me on Thursday wondering where I was, and when I called in on Friday with the succinct "I'm still burning up and having trouble with the whole "keeping food down thing", I won't be in" his answer was "Okey Dokey".

But I'm pretty sure I'm going to be at work tomorrow, and I have no idea how boss actually felt about getting a strange 5 am email with instructions on stuff that "oh, by the way, you need to do this".

I really have no idea what I was thinking.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Rohanna on February 12, 2012, 05:44:31 PM
Or in my case, 'Nyquil, the coughing, sneezing, aching, keep me up all night' medicine.

I have the opposite reaction to the  drug that puts you to sleep.  Nyquil gives me horrendous insomnia.  So does Tylenol (acetominophen).  I'm up the creek if I ever need major painkillers because most of the heavy duty ones have acetominophen in the formulation.

I also can't take Nyquil. It gives me the jitters & keeps me up all night. Nice to see I'm not the only one.

Sleeping tablets or sedatives make me completely hysterical too. Which makes it hard if I have to have an unleasant medical procedure...

It's probably the diphenhydromine. It makes me crazy restless. Some nurses looked at like me like I was nuts, but now it seems to be an acceptable sensitivity. I always put it on my list of allergies but they still recommended it last time I left the hospital. (Doxolomine does work - it's in one of the Unisom varieties. Read the label!)

As a side note, if you ever need prescription painkillers: oxycoCET/percoCET etc means it contains tylenol. PercoDAN is the same active ingredient, mixed with asprin instead. So you can use narcotics you just need to ask to have the right formulation prescribed :) There are some new varieties that use ibuprofin as well :)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Pinky830 on February 12, 2012, 07:54:46 PM
Or in my case, 'Nyquil, the coughing, sneezing, aching, keep me up all night' medicine.

I have the opposite reaction to the  drug that puts you to sleep.  Nyquil gives me horrendous insomnia.  So does Tylenol (acetominophen).  I'm up the creek if I ever need major painkillers because most of the heavy duty ones have acetominophen in the formulation.

I also can't take Nyquil. It gives me the jitters & keeps me up all night. Nice to see I'm not the only one.

Sleeping tablets or sedatives make me completely hysterical too. Which makes it hard if I have to have an unleasant medical procedure...

It's probably the diphenhydromine. It makes me crazy restless. Some nurses looked at like me like I was nuts, but now it seems to be an acceptable sensitivity. I always put it on my list of allergies but they still recommended it last time I left the hospital. (Doxolomine does work - it's in one of the Unisom varieties. Read the label!)

As a side note, if you ever need prescription painkillers: oxycoCET/percoCET etc means it contains tylenol. PercoDAN is the same active ingredient, mixed with asprin instead. So you can use narcotics you just need to ask to have the right formulation prescribed :) There are some new varieties that use ibuprofin as well :)

That's really good to know. I am sensitive to the salicylates in aspirin. If I take anything with aspirin in it, I feel faint for 30-45 minutes.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: artk2002 on February 12, 2012, 08:59:56 PM
Not something I did, but something dumb that happened about 60 years ago.

In the Special Snowflake thread I mentioned that I knew the story of an airplane wing that went missing for 40 years. Here's what I know:

In the 1980s I was working for a division of Lockheed in Burbank, CA. What is now Bob Hope Airport was originally the Lockheed airfield and there were still many old buildings left over from WW II. A number of military aircraft were built in those facilities, including the P-38 Lightning. Lockheed finally sold the land and buildings to the surrounding communities and they began to tear down the buildings so that they could expand the airport.

Behind a wall in one of the factory buildings they found the wing of a P-38! A colleague whose father had worked for Lockheed during WWII told me that at the height of wartime production a P-38 wing had gone missing. This, of course, triggered a massive security search up and down the west coast -- the fear was that spies had somehow managed to steal the wing. But there it was, behind the wall all the time.

The speculation is that a work crew was ordered to build a wall there, for some reason. The wing was sitting there and they just built the wall in front of it. Wartime turnover being what it was, the crew that built the wall could have been called up for duty the next day, so they wouldn't be around for the search. I can just imagine the crew going to the boss saying "there's a wing there, what should we do?" and the boss responding "just build the g** d**** wall!"

As an aside, my colleague was walking down the corridor of one of the old office buildings before they tore it down. He stopped and looked at one of those glass cases where they post notices and such. There was a memo signed by his father, 40 years earlier, still posted!

A second aside: While taking down another building they found the wing spar from a Lockheed Electra.  It was being used as part of a crane in one of the factory buildings.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: 2littlemonkeys on February 13, 2012, 10:52:55 AM
Oh lord, that reminded me...

Women! If you're in the woods at night and need to go to the loo, take a torch and watch out for nettles. Eeeek.

 ;D

and poison ivy.   ::)

ETA: and I just realized I'm not the only one who has had this experience.   :P
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Outdoor Girl on February 13, 2012, 11:27:15 AM
My friend and I were going camping for the weekend.  We arrived pretty close to dark so I set her up to make dinner while I pitched the tent.

The next morning, while we were exploring the campground, we discovered that it had a lot of poison ivy around.  So we were taking all sorts of pictures of the different poison ivys they had there because my friend's boyfriend had gotten into some while climbing and had such a bad case of it that he had to get steroids to get rid of it.  We were trying to help him out  ;) and then arriving back at our campsite, I discovered that I'd pitched the back of the tent in patch of it!

Fortunately, I'm (so far) immune but it meant that I had to pack the tent up pretty much on my own.

Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jedikaiti on February 13, 2012, 12:29:55 PM
Not something I did, but something dumb that happened about 60 years ago.

In the Special Snowflake thread I mentioned that I knew the story of an airplane wing that went missing for 40 years.

Thanks for posting that!

That is funny, and I can totally see that happening, too.

Any chance your colleague managed to get & keep that memo his Dad had signed? That would be really neat to have.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: crankycat on February 17, 2012, 12:29:57 PM
Note to self: You know better than to leave the lid only partially closed on jars.  Of course, the time you slack on this basic knowledge is the day you drop the mayo jar on its way back into the fridge.  (Good thing it was a plastic jar.)

Currently trying to figure out how to get mayo off the ceiling, since I am not tall enough to reach it while standing on a chair.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Luci on February 17, 2012, 12:46:30 PM
Note to self: You know better than to leave the lid only partially closed on jars.  Of course, the time you slack on this basic knowledge is the day you drop the mayo jar on its way back into the fridge.  (Good thing it was a plastic jar.)

Currently trying to figure out how to get mayo off the ceiling, since I am not tall enough to reach it while standing on a chair.

Not recommended: using a Swiffer duster soaked with cleanser, which results in the mayo being cleaned off but a clean spot on the ceiling, which will result in having to clean the entire ceiling and having horrid streaks which means paint the ceiling. I do know, however, that if I use latex paint and mask and drape the cabinets well and diligently scrub other drips, I do not have to paint the entire kitchen. (My scenario was tomato sauce, by the way.)

Recommended: Just leave it. It will dry and just be another spot.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: guihong on February 17, 2012, 02:55:27 PM
Note to self: You know better than to leave the lid only partially closed on jars.  Of course, the time you slack on this basic knowledge is the day you drop the mayo jar on its way back into the fridge.  (Good thing it was a plastic jar.)

Currently trying to figure out how to get mayo off the ceiling, since I am not tall enough to reach it while standing on a chair.

Rubber band a big wet rag to the end of a broom handle, and try wiping that way?  You'll get drips, but those are reachable.  (says me, who dropped a two-liter of Orange Crush  ::))
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: JennJenn68 on February 17, 2012, 04:11:38 PM
Not something stupid I've done at the moment (although there have been plenty of those!) but something stupid my husband did about thirteen years ago.  The "mayonnaise on the ceiling" just brought it all back. 

Just after our son was born, I was suffering from serious PPD, and my gem of a husband stepped up to the plate and offered to make his speciality, Spanish Rice-A-Roni.  (Hey, at the time, anyone besides me cooking was a wonderful thing!)  His version involved a can of tomatoes.  I was in the kitchen marching around trying to get the baby to calm down.  (Baby only was calm when whoever was holding him was on the move.  Exhausting.  He's an only child, needless to say...)  DH was working fast, trying to get everything assembled and into the microwave because he could sense that I was just about at my limit and he wanted to take over.  (Sweet guy!)  He opened the can of tomatoes at breakneck speed, grabbed the can and... dropped it.  It landed bottom down on the floor, and the contents rose straight upward and covered a two-foot area of our ceiling, which is as high as most ceilings are.  I have to admit, it was particularly impressive-looking, this geyser of canned tomatoes going SPLAT! above his head...

Keep in mind that I had PPD.  He was terrified that I was going to lose it completely.  I do remember thinking for one second, "Dear God, how should I react to this?"  And then... I burst out laughing.  There was a hysterical tinge to it, I must admit, but I laughed, and I hadn't done that at all since the baby was born. 

I never was able to get the tomato stains out of the ceiling until Mr. Clean came out with the Magic Eraser.  Thank you, Mr. Clean!

(I'll 'fess up about my own stupid stuff if I can ever think of a sufficiently entertaining way of phrasing it...)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: mechtilde on February 17, 2012, 04:18:55 PM
Poison ivy- well we don't have it in England. At the age of 16 I went to a Girl Scout camp in the US and walked right through a big patch of it. I had absolutely no idea what it was!

Amazing luck- I wasn't allergic to it! The evil New Hampshire mosquitoes were another story though...
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Elfmama on February 17, 2012, 04:32:29 PM
Poison ivy- well we don't have it in England. At the age of 16 I went to a Girl Scout camp in the US and walked right through a big patch of it. I had absolutely no idea what it was!

Amazing luck- I wasn't allergic to it! The evil New Hampshire mosquitoes were another story though...
:o  How to ID poison ivy should have been one of the very first things the US GS  leaders taught you.

I did just that at a quilter's retreat in Tennessee.  I noted a patch of it in a flower bed, asked if everybody knew how to ID it, and gave a lesson on it then and there.  LOTS of poison ivy in the area, but no one came down with it!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: crankycat on February 17, 2012, 07:24:20 PM
Note to self: You know better than to leave the lid only partially closed on jars.  Of course, the time you slack on this basic knowledge is the day you drop the mayo jar on its way back into the fridge.  (Good thing it was a plastic jar.)

Currently trying to figure out how to get mayo off the ceiling, since I am not tall enough to reach it while standing on a chair.

Rubber band a big wet rag to the end of a broom handle, and try wiping that way?  You'll get drips, but those are reachable.  (says me, who dropped a two-liter of Orange Crush  ::))

This is actually pretty close to my solution.  I stood on a chair (and occasionally the counter) and used the dusting wand draped with a wet towel with dish soap to wipe it off.  Fortunately, my kitchen ceiling is covered in a textured, off-white wallpaper, so for now it seems to be clean.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jedikaiti on February 17, 2012, 07:35:45 PM
Poison ivy- well we don't have it in England. At the age of 16 I went to a Girl Scout camp in the US and walked right through a big patch of it. I had absolutely no idea what it was!

Amazing luck- I wasn't allergic to it! The evil New Hampshire mosquitoes were another story though...
:o  How to ID poison ivy should have been one of the very first things the US GS  leaders taught you.

I did just that at a quilter's retreat in Tennessee.  I noted a patch of it in a flower bed, asked if everybody knew how to ID it, and gave a lesson on it then and there.  LOTS of poison ivy in the area, but no one came down with it!

This reminds me of a Mythbuster's episode where they were testing Vodka as a cure for poison oak. Kari couldn't be a subject, as she was known to have had a Very Bad Reaction to it as a child, so they tried it on Grant and Tory. And Adam and Jamie. And on interns and any other crew member who was willing to be a guinea pig, before they finally found One Person who developed a rash. Nobody else had any reaction whatsoever.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Thipu1 on February 18, 2012, 10:48:59 AM
Poison ivy- well we don't have it in England. At the age of 16 I went to a Girl Scout camp in the US and walked right through a big patch of it. I had absolutely no idea what it was!

Amazing luck- I wasn't allergic to it! The evil New Hampshire mosquitoes were another story though...

Poison ivy is something a bit strange.  Repeated exposure will heighten the reaction.  On your first encounter you were probably safe.

However, the counselors should have told campers about the hazard. 

Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Sirius on February 18, 2012, 10:57:05 AM
Urushiol oil (the thing that makes poison ivy cause rashes) can be vicious stuff.  I read that in Japan, when a building was covered in a dome made of some type of precious metal, the builders painted the metal with lacquer made with urushiol oil to keep thieves from stealing the metal.  No word on how well it worked, though.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Julian on February 18, 2012, 04:23:33 PM
Even though it is still officially summer here, we have had some chilly nights, so I thought I would clean the flue of the wood heater so I could light the fire.  Unfortunately some wee birdies had nested in the end of the flue last spring, so there is a lot of grass and straw up there.

Cue Jules with the 4 metre brush, trying valiantly to clear the blockage from below.  I pushed, and slipped...  And my forearm banged hard onto the top of the opening.  Very hard.  I am on aspirin.  I now have a bruise half the length of my forearm and nearly the full circumference, and it is pretty red and purple, swollen and tender.  Owies!

And the blockage is still there...

To add insult to injury I went blackberry picking yesterday.  The thorns are more than capable of piercing leather gloves. 

Sigh...
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Gwywnnydd on February 18, 2012, 04:29:52 PM
BF adopted our dog, Pilsner, before we met. I wish I could have known Pilsner as a puppy, as he was both adorable and entertaining. He's still both, but I'm sure you get what I mean.

Apparently, when he was a puppy, he ate an entire big box of crayons. The whole thing.

Apparently, he poo'd rainbows for a few days after that.

Oh dear, our dog did something similar to this once.

My BFF's daughter did this once. Ate an entire 64 color box of crayons.
Clearly she had eaten the like colors together, because that's how they came out...
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Irk Splee on February 18, 2012, 05:30:30 PM
Yesterday morning, I set up a pot of coffee, then went off to get ready for the day. I came back to a finished pot...

Then, in a half-awake haze, I took the pot, dumped it in the sink, and started a new pot.

Normally, I just drink coffee for the taste and don't need it to wake up, but clearly, yesterday was an exception!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Thipu1 on February 18, 2012, 06:25:48 PM
BF adopted our dog, Pilsner, before we met. I wish I could have known Pilsner as a puppy, as he was both adorable and entertaining. He's still both, but I'm sure you get what I mean.

Apparently, when he was a puppy, he ate an entire big box of crayons. The whole thing.

Apparently, he poo'd rainbows for a few days after that.

We had a dog who would slurp the tinsel off the Christmas tree like a kid eating spaghetti.  We thank the deity that the tinsel was plastic instead of lead.  Let us just say that the neighborhood was treated to extra holiday decorations when Pups was taken put for a walk. 
Oh dear, our dog did something similar to this once.

My BFF's daughter did this once. Ate an entire 64 color box of crayons.
Clearly she had eaten the like colors together, because that's how they came out...
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: catgal on February 18, 2012, 06:51:28 PM
Julian, you are making me miss picking juicy Tassie blackberries, then coming back tired and scratched and making pies and crumbles. There were many times when picking blackberries that the best ones would be in the middle of the patch, and I'd strech out to pick them, only to fall into the brambles and get caught and ripped to shreds.  Enjoy some for me :D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Julian on February 18, 2012, 11:46:36 PM
Hi Catgal

They were beautiful, well worth the scratches and puncture wounds! 

My friend said we should have brought a step ladder to get to the best ones, yeah, can just imagine me toppling off into the brambles! 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Sirius on February 19, 2012, 12:24:26 AM
BF adopted our dog, Pilsner, before we met. I wish I could have known Pilsner as a puppy, as he was both adorable and entertaining. He's still both, but I'm sure you get what I mean.

Apparently, when he was a puppy, he ate an entire big box of crayons. The whole thing.

Apparently, he poo'd rainbows for a few days after that.

We had a dog who would slurp the tinsel off the Christmas tree like a kid eating spaghetti.  We thank the deity that the tinsel was plastic instead of lead.  Let us just say that the neighborhood was treated to extra holiday decorations when Pups was taken put for a walk. 
Oh dear, our dog did something similar to this once.

My BFF's daughter did this once. Ate an entire 64 color box of crayons.
Clearly she had eaten the like colors together, because that's how they came out...

My sister's cat would eat the tinsel off the Christmas tree, then urp shiny piles.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Hollanda on February 19, 2012, 12:06:46 PM
When I was 12, I was boy crazy. Seriously. Yuck, such a turn off lol! Anyway, I can now laugh about it. Apart from this.

I wrote a love letter to the boy who lived up our road. It was...well...interesting. What possessed me to write it I don't know. Anyway, I thought it was a great idea to post it through his door. The "ohnosecond" came as soon as the paper hit the floor. I immediately rang the doorbell and sheepishly asked his mum to please give me the letter back. She said "What letter?" I mumbled, "That letter..." and pointed at the envelope on the floor. She said nothing, just gave me it back. I immediately tore the letter up and dumped it in the rubbish. Seriously silly thing to do. Especially as he was 14 at the time, and would have shown the letter to all his friends at school, thus giving everyone more ammunition to pick on me. My face still burns with the shame.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: HorseFreak on February 19, 2012, 12:52:03 PM
BF adopted our dog, Pilsner, before we met. I wish I could have known Pilsner as a puppy, as he was both adorable and entertaining. He's still both, but I'm sure you get what I mean.

Apparently, when he was a puppy, he ate an entire big box of crayons. The whole thing.

Apparently, he poo'd rainbows for a few days after that.

We had a dog who would slurp the tinsel off the Christmas tree like a kid eating spaghetti.  We thank the deity that the tinsel was plastic instead of lead.  Let us just say that the neighborhood was treated to extra holiday decorations when Pups was taken put for a walk. 
Oh dear, our dog did something similar to this once.

My BFF's daughter did this once. Ate an entire 64 color box of crayons.
Clearly she had eaten the like colors together, because that's how they came out...

My sister's cat would eat the tinsel off the Christmas tree, then urp shiny piles.


Just a PSA on Christmas tinsel (I only mention it because several posters have mentioned pets eating it): it is VERY DANGEROUS for pets, especially cats to eat tinsel! It can cause the intestines to scrunch up like an accordion and cause a lot of pain and damage, potentially leading to death or at least an expensive vet bill.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Elfmama on February 19, 2012, 03:54:29 PM

Just a PSA on Christmas tinsel (I only mention it because several posters have mentioned pets eating it): it is VERY DANGEROUS for pets, especially cats to eat tinsel! It can cause the intestines to scrunch up like an accordion and cause a lot of pain and damage, potentially leading to death or at least an expensive vet bill.
I was just about to mention it also.  Impacted guts full of tinsel are not good things.  I haven't used the stringy kind of tinsel in decades, because of the cat.  We use the rope kind.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Sirius on February 19, 2012, 04:14:29 PM
The cat I mentioned went to the Rainbow Bridge when he was 18. 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: DoubleTrouble on February 20, 2012, 10:30:37 AM
Stupid things I've done?  Lots!

However, one incident which comes to mind harks back to childhood.  We had just had a shiny new upright freezer installed at home, and it was plugged in to freeze up nicely prior to food being put in it.  For some reason, my mother thought it a good idea to warn me "now make sure you don't open the freezer up and stick your tongue on the bars!"  Whiskey, Tango, Foxtrot???  I'd have never even thought of it had she not explicitly and very precisely ensured by those words that this curious 7 year old would do just that! 

Of course, she freaked when I did, and got stuck fast by my tongue.  She proceeded to YANK my head back, to free me.  Several layers of tongue were left behind, quite a lot of bleeding ensued, and a trip into town to the doctor was required.

LOL I did that but outside on our metal railing. See it was time for Dad to take us to preschool/daycare & while usually we took the bus it was a nasty winter day so Dad called for a taxi. Right when the taxi got there I planted my tongue on the railing & naturally freaked out as did my brother. Dad does not suffer fools gladly & as we were running late yanked me back to free my tongue. Blood everywhere but again, we were running late so he stuffed my mouth with Kleenex & hustled me & brother into the taxi. According to Dad the taxi driver was freaking out that I was going to bleed to death via my tongue while Dad is telling him to just get going already! To this day that's still my Dad's favorite story to tell about me ;D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: DoubleTrouble on February 20, 2012, 10:55:39 AM
Still not finished with the thread but the knife & key stories reminded me of a couple.

Key #1 - When we changed the locks on our new house I wasn't really thinking about keeping all the keys on me while changing the locks around. I changed the backdoor lock then check it to make sure that it latched properly ... with the keys sitting on the steps ... inside ... with the dog who's now looking at me like "why are you out there, come & feed me!" I had to track down a random person in the neighborhood & beg to use their phone to call DH to come home which took 45 minutes. Thankfully it was fall & nice outside.

Key #2 - Our babysitter managed to lock herself out of the house while the boys were still inside & awake (they were about 1 1/2 at the time). She got back in to the house by knocking out the window in our backdoor but couldn't get it back in (it was plastic) & decided to call us at the restaurant to let us know. Really as long as she was back inside it could have waited until we got home!

Knife - DH was cutting a bagel one morning & not watching where he put his fingers in relation to the nice sharp bread knife. A yell & curse later DH is at the sink with cold water running over his cut finger. The funny part (once we determined he wasn't badly hurt) was that there was a spray pattern across the cabinets & even on the ceiling! We cleaned the cabinets but not the ceiling as it was most impressive.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Outdoor Girl on February 20, 2012, 11:05:57 AM
I still don't know how I did this.  While I was shaving yesterday, I somehow managed to cut through the nail on my baby finger.  It really hurt but when I looked at it, there was no blood and couldn't see anything.  Until I pressed on it.  Then it started to bleed.  Since it wasn't a fresh razor, I figured it was a good idea to bleed it a bit.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: wendelenn on February 20, 2012, 11:20:16 AM
Stupid things I've done?  Lots!

However, one incident which comes to mind harks back to childhood.  We had just had a shiny new upright freezer installed at home, and it was plugged in to freeze up nicely prior to food being put in it.  For some reason, my mother thought it a good idea to warn me "now make sure you don't open the freezer up and stick your tongue on the bars!"  Whiskey, Tango, Foxtrot???  I'd have never even thought of it had she not explicitly and very precisely ensured by those words that this curious 7 year old would do just that! 

Of course, she freaked when I did, and got stuck fast by my tongue.  She proceeded to YANK my head back, to free me.  Several layers of tongue were left behind, quite a lot of bleeding ensued, and a trip into town to the doctor was required.

LOL I did that but outside on our metal railing. See it was time for Dad to take us to preschool/daycare & while usually we took the bus it was a nasty winter day so Dad called for a taxi. Right when the taxi got there I planted my tongue on the railing & naturally freaked out as did my brother. Dad does not suffer fools gladly & as we were running late yanked me back to free my tongue. Blood everywhere but again, we were running late so he stuffed my mouth with Kleenex & hustled me & brother into the taxi. According to Dad the taxi driver was freaking out that I was going to bleed to death via my tongue while Dad is telling him to just get going already! To this day that's still my Dad's favorite story to tell about me ;D

I TRIPLE dog dare you. . .
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Irishkitty on February 20, 2012, 11:28:33 AM
I still don't know how I did this.  While I was shaving yesterday, I somehow managed to cut through the nail on my baby finger.  It really hurt but when I looked at it, there was no blood and couldn't see anything.  Until I pressed on it.  Then it started to bleed.  Since it wasn't a fresh razor, I figured it was a good idea to bleed it a bit.

Ack, I have done this so often I actually have to remind myself not to "brush" the razor over my nails when I'm shaving my legs.  ::)

Oh, and my latest - The nail on my big toe was a little jagged, so decided to cut my toenails with the closest thing to hand - a fingernail cutter. I was actually thinking "Huh, this is much more curved than the toenail cutter, I hope I don't cut the middle of my big toenail... ouch... oh, there's a little bit of blood too!"  ::)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jpcher on February 20, 2012, 04:47:51 PM
We have a Brita water tank (bigger than a pitcher) in our fridge. It was time to replace the filter, so I took it apart and ran it through the dishwasher. When the wash cycle was done the tank wasn't dry all the way so I put it upside down on a towel to let it drain/air dry.

This morning DD#2 went for a glass of water and asked me why I didn't fill the tank yesterday?

I said "It wasn't dry yet, so I just let it air dry."

DD#2: Um. Momma? . . . Why bother drying it? Isn't that sorta pointless when you're just going to fill it with that, you know . . . WET water?  ::)


Yeah. I didn't have an answer for that.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Shopaholic on February 21, 2012, 08:49:07 AM
The stupid thing I have done with a Brita water filter is to fill up the filter part and then immediately pour myself a glass of water...
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Reader on February 21, 2012, 03:01:21 PM
Forgot to remove my tube of chapstick from my jeans pocket and not only washed and dried the load, but I didn't even remember I had done that until the load had only 10 minutes left on the dry cycle. 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Twik on February 21, 2012, 03:19:23 PM
Poison ivy- well we don't have it in England. At the age of 16 I went to a Girl Scout camp in the US and walked right through a big patch of it. I had absolutely no idea what it was!

Amazing luck- I wasn't allergic to it! The evil New Hampshire mosquitoes were another story though...

Poison ivy is something a bit strange.  Repeated exposure will heighten the reaction.  On your first encounter you were probably safe.

However, the counselors should have told campers about the hazard.

Poison ivy is like many allergies - it requires an initial exposure to "take", so to speak. Of course, most people don't even notice they're in it the first time, so they have no recall of why on a subsequent exposure they're reacting horribly.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: StarFaerie on February 21, 2012, 05:57:44 PM
I just thought of another really dumb thing I did, and now that I'm all healed up, 3 weeks later..... 

I have this brand-new lovely SUV, manual shift.  It's a little bit bigger than I expected, and I'm a lot bigger than average, so it's kind of hard for me to reach the parking brake when I'm sitting in the seat.  I always leave it in gear, so I'd gotten into the habit of crawling halfway into the car, then popping the brake and climbing in.   

One Sunday after church, I start climbing into the car, and pop the brake. It's slipped out of gear and starts to roll (I'm on a hill!).  I can't reach the brake pedal in time, so the car knocks me down, drags me along the parking lot a bit, then rolls over my foot and heads for the treeline!!  Fortunately, there *was* a tree in the way, and it stops the car.  I'm on the ground, surrounded by people. 

The car has only a small crack in the rear bumper, and I have a big ouchie on one elbow, and bruises and batterings up and down my leg, but nothing's broken!!  (I had to call my dad and thank him for the Good Genes!).   
By the way, seeing a car roll like that is only funny on America's Funniest Home Videoes.  Not so funny when it's your brand-new car!

I now have a long shoelace tied to the parking brake release lever, and I am inside the car with foot firmly on brake before pulling the string.  Don't ask me why I didn't do this 3 months ago when I bought the car!

Wow, you're lucky to be alive. I knew a woman who tried to leap back in her car when it started to roll, it dragged her, she hit her head and died. So tragic.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Elfmama on February 21, 2012, 06:01:17 PM
Forgot to remove my tube of chapstick from my jeans pocket and not only washed and dried the load, but I didn't even remember I had done that until the load had only 10 minutes left on the dry cycle.
You should see what a purple crayon does to a load of laundry!  Not my mistake, though -- my toddler hid it in the toe of a sock, which then went through the washer and the commercial dryer.  It ruined a whole load of clothes, including DH's uniform shirts and Elfqueen's school blouses.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: kherbert05 on February 21, 2012, 07:21:31 PM
Poison ivy- well we don't have it in England. At the age of 16 I went to a Girl Scout camp in the US and walked right through a big patch of it. I had absolutely no idea what it was!

Amazing luck- I wasn't allergic to it! The evil New Hampshire mosquitoes were another story though...

Poison ivy is something a bit strange.  Repeated exposure will heighten the reaction.  On your first encounter you were probably safe.

However, the counselors should have told campers about the hazard.

Poison ivy is like many allergies - it requires an initial exposure to "take", so to speak. Of course, most people don't even notice they're in it the first time, so they have no recall of why on a subsequent exposure they're reacting horribly.


I once felt so bad for a neighbor. She let us pick mullberries out of a tree at the end of her property. One year she saw us and came to tell us to stay out just for now because she had noticed poison ivy around the tree. She wanted to get rid of it. She took one look at me - and insisted on rushing me home. I don't know if my skin was extra bad that time or bright because I was hot - or if this sweet lady had just overlooked the fact I pretty much had a rash 365 days a year and noticed it this one time because she was thinking about the poison ivy.


Mom calmed her down and got her to understand that the rash was normal for me. Our Dad and a couple of the other Dads went down and pulled all the posion ivy up for her. (They looked funny long sleeves with gloves long pants tucked inside socks or boots in 90 degree weather).
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Shopaholic on February 21, 2012, 10:57:06 PM
Poison ivy- well we don't have it in England. At the age of 16 I went to a Girl Scout camp in the US and walked right through a big patch of it. I had absolutely no idea what it was!

Amazing luck- I wasn't allergic to it! The evil New Hampshire mosquitoes were another story though...

Poison ivy is something a bit strange.  Repeated exposure will heighten the reaction.  On your first encounter you were probably safe.

However, the counselors should have told campers about the hazard.

Poison ivy is like many allergies - it requires an initial exposure to "take", so to speak. Of course, most people don't even notice they're in it the first time, so they have no recall of why on a subsequent exposure they're reacting horribly.

Not to be a know-it-all, but that is the definition of allergies, basically - repeated exposure exacerbates the immune response.
Nothing will happpen the first time you're exposed, because that is the first time the body is faced with the anitgen. The more you are exposed, the more immune cells are created, the quicker and more aggressive the immune response will be.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Kaora on February 22, 2012, 01:19:32 PM
If I posted this before, I blame it on me being ditzy.  So, forgive me. :)

A long time ago, I took a Computer / A+ Cert class in High School.  Part of the experience is learning how to solder.

I was working with my now BF on soldering practice (which is, really, building tons of tiny robots :) ) and he handed me the iron to use.

Instead of grabbing the nice, cool, grip, I somehow grabbed the barrel of the iron instead.

I just calmly handed it to BF, then ran out of the room to run my hands under the drinking fountain in the hall.  I'm pretty sure the teacher, a really cool guy, understood why I left in a rush.  Explained it on the way in.

Not seriously burned, but it was a stupid moment in itself. ::)

Though, the poison ivy talk has me curious.  If poison ivy is an attractive nuisance, why not, oh, say, Oleander, which is used in a lot of gardens in my town?  Ivy tends to just itch, nastily.  Oleander, ingested, kills.  Also, it bugs me because there is a lot of it just within pet or kid level. :o
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: 2littlemonkeys on February 22, 2012, 02:29:13 PM
Forgot to remove my tube of chapstick from my jeans pocket and not only washed and dried the load, but I didn't even remember I had done that until the load had only 10 minutes left on the dry cycle.
You should see what a purple crayon does to a load of laundry!  Not my mistake, though -- my toddler hid it in the toe of a sock, which then went through the washer and the commercial dryer.  It ruined a whole load of clothes, including DH's uniform shirts and Elfqueen's school blouses.

Ours was blue.  Both times.   :o  Fortunately, the clothes were underwear and socks and Dh's work shirts (and not the Brook Brother's sort.  More like the Hane's "so stinky it can walk to the washing machine itself" sort.)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Pinky830 on February 23, 2012, 07:58:30 PM
When I was 12, I was boy crazy. Seriously. Yuck, such a turn off lol! Anyway, I can now laugh about it. Apart from this.

I wrote a love letter to the boy who lived up our road. It was...well...interesting. What possessed me to write it I don't know. Anyway, I thought it was a great idea to post it through his door. The "ohnosecond" came as soon as the paper hit the floor. I immediately rang the doorbell and sheepishly asked his mum to please give me the letter back. She said "What letter?" I mumbled, "That letter..." and pointed at the envelope on the floor. She said nothing, just gave me it back. I immediately tore the letter up and dumped it in the rubbish. Seriously silly thing to do. Especially as he was 14 at the time, and would have shown the letter to all his friends at school, thus giving everyone more ammunition to pick on me. My face still burns with the shame.

In high school, I had a math teacher who would read notes out loud to the entire class if she took one up. I was writing a note to my BFF, an extremely incriminating note involving lots of exclaiming over our various crushes...and I got CAUGHT. Of all the times. I never, ever got caught writing a note.

The teacher read it silently for a few seconds while I pondered how my parents would feel if I suddenly demanded to be transferred to another school. She gave me an exasperated smile and handed it back to me. I wasn't much of a troublemaker, and I guess she decided the one time I got in trouble there was no reason to humiliate me as badly as reading that note would have. I bet she doesn't remember it anymore, but 25 years later I am still insanely grateful.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Silversurfer on February 23, 2012, 11:22:56 PM
Ok, I have something to add!
(probably have a lot to add, but this one happened only a few days ago and is fresh in my mind.)

I was holding my phone while opening the garage door and somehow it got water on it. I wiped the dirty, muddy water (like a drop) on my blac dress and got into the car. THe fact that my touch screen was a little bit wet meant the screen saver was going a bit funny.

So, i logically thought that if i wet it again, it would be ok. So i licked it.

As soon as I licked it I thought "What the hell?? Why did I do that?"

It worked, the screen saver went back to normal. But, seriously ewwwwwwwwww!!!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: afbluebelle on February 25, 2012, 11:46:50 AM
When I was 12, I was boy crazy. Seriously. Yuck, such a turn off lol! Anyway, I can now laugh about it. Apart from this.

I wrote a love letter to the boy who lived up our road. It was...well...interesting. What possessed me to write it I don't know. Anyway, I thought it was a great idea to post it through his door. The "ohnosecond" came as soon as the paper hit the floor. I immediately rang the doorbell and sheepishly asked his mum to please give me the letter back. She said "What letter?" I mumbled, "That letter..." and pointed at the envelope on the floor. She said nothing, just gave me it back. I immediately tore the letter up and dumped it in the rubbish. Seriously silly thing to do. Especially as he was 14 at the time, and would have shown the letter to all his friends at school, thus giving everyone more ammunition to pick on me. My face still burns with the shame.

In high school, I had a math teacher who would read notes out loud to the entire class if she took one up. I was writing a note to my BFF, an extremely incriminating note involving lots of exclaiming over our various crushes...and I got CAUGHT. Of all the times. I never, ever got caught writing a note.

The teacher read it silently for a few seconds while I pondered how my parents would feel if I suddenly demanded to be transferred to another school. She gave me an exasperated smile and handed it back to me. I wasn't much of a troublemaker, and I guess she decided the one time I got in trouble there was no reason to humiliate me as badly as reading that note would have. I bet she doesn't remember it anymore, but 25 years later I am still insanely grateful.

In situations like that, I was pretty well known for the "snatch, grab, and nom."  Saved many a reputation with my tolerance of the taste of ink and super active salivary gland.  bonus points for the teacher trying to pry my jaw open and me growling at him  ;D (Teacher and I got along very well, I wouldn't have actually bitten him.... hard >:D)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Firecat on February 25, 2012, 04:04:12 PM
When I was 12, I was boy crazy. Seriously. Yuck, such a turn off lol! Anyway, I can now laugh about it. Apart from this.

I wrote a love letter to the boy who lived up our road. It was...well...interesting. What possessed me to write it I don't know. Anyway, I thought it was a great idea to post it through his door. The "ohnosecond" came as soon as the paper hit the floor. I immediately rang the doorbell and sheepishly asked his mum to please give me the letter back. She said "What letter?" I mumbled, "That letter..." and pointed at the envelope on the floor. She said nothing, just gave me it back. I immediately tore the letter up and dumped it in the rubbish. Seriously silly thing to do. Especially as he was 14 at the time, and would have shown the letter to all his friends at school, thus giving everyone more ammunition to pick on me. My face still burns with the shame.

In high school, I had a math teacher who would read notes out loud to the entire class if she took one up. I was writing a note to my BFF, an extremely incriminating note involving lots of exclaiming over our various crushes...and I got CAUGHT. Of all the times. I never, ever got caught writing a note.

The teacher read it silently for a few seconds while I pondered how my parents would feel if I suddenly demanded to be transferred to another school. She gave me an exasperated smile and handed it back to me. I wasn't much of a troublemaker, and I guess she decided the one time I got in trouble there was no reason to humiliate me as badly as reading that note would have. I bet she doesn't remember it anymore, but 25 years later I am still insanely grateful.

In situations like that, I was pretty well known for the "snatch, grab, and nom."  Saved many a reputation with my tolerance of the taste of ink and super active salivary gland.  bonus points for the teacher trying to pry my jaw open and me growling at him  ;D (Teacher and I got along very well, I wouldn't have actually bitten him.... hard >:D)

The bolded just HAS to be a tag line at some point - LOL!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: squeakers on July 29, 2012, 01:59:57 AM
Listening to netflix (SVU from the beginning ;-) and suddenly only hear sound from one side.  Toss that set of ear buds and grab up a pair of slightly older ear plugs.  Same thing.  Irritation mounts until my oldest son offers me a set of ear phones.

Only one side.  grrr!

Son looks at me and pulls set and re-plugs them directly into my pc.  Bypassing my stereo speakers.

Huzzah! Sound in both ears!

Umm. Duh! My power pack gave up the ghost the other day and the router fried.  Both router and speakers were plugged into the pack.  Luckily the pc was/is fine.


Perhaps a first world annoyance: can't plug ear buds into my pc unless I want to lie down.  Ear phones are working but sit annoying on my head vs directly over my ear holes and not near as loud as I would prefer. Ehhh? (what did you just say?)


Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: aion on July 29, 2012, 06:56:14 AM
In my younger student days I was faced by a mess in the kitchen of epic proportions. I was out of dishwasher tablets, too dingdangity lazy to do the dishes by hand, and way too dingdangity lazy to walk the 5 minutes (return) to the store. I had liquid dish soap, so how different could it be to the stuff you are meant to put in the dishwashing machine?

40 minutes and a kitchen filled to bench height with soap bubbles I learnt: Very very different.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: tiff019 on July 30, 2012, 03:25:32 PM
Listening to netflix (SVU from the beginning ;-) and suddenly only hear sound from one side.  Toss that set of ear buds and grab up a pair of slightly older ear plugs.  Same thing.  Irritation mounts until my oldest son offers me a set of ear phones.

Only one side.  grrr!

Son looks at me and pulls set and re-plugs them directly into my pc.  Bypassing my stereo speakers.

Huzzah! Sound in both ears!

Umm. Duh! My power pack gave up the ghost the other day and the router fried.  Both router and speakers were plugged into the pack.  Luckily the pc was/is fine.


Perhaps a first world annoyance: can't plug ear buds into my pc unless I want to lie down.  Ear phones are working but sit annoying on my head vs directly over my ear holes and not near as loud as I would prefer. Ehhh? (what did you just say?)

You can get an extender cord at Radio Shack or the like. I used one on my old stereo with no problems for years to route my tv sound through it. Worked fantastic. I'ts pretty cheap too if I remember correctly.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: mbbored on July 30, 2012, 09:08:05 PM
Today I punched myself in the eye with my hairbrush and now it's distinctly swollen. Do I get the prize for the day?
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: guihong on July 30, 2012, 10:18:36 PM
Do NOT say "Oh, it's a cloudy day, won't get sunburned"  :'(.  Doubly dumb because I was at the pool. 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: kitty-cat on July 30, 2012, 11:22:56 PM
Do NOT say "Oh, it's a cloudy day, won't get sunburned"  :'(.  Doubly dumb because I was at the pool.

I once got a really bad sunburn in February on a not really too sunny day. It was unusually hot that day so I was wearing a tank top and flip flops. (the joys of Florida- it'll be super cold one day and pushing the upper 70's the next)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: squeakers on July 31, 2012, 12:27:25 AM

Umm. Duh! My power pack gave up the ghost the other day and the router fried.  Both router and speakers were plugged into the pack.  Luckily the pc was/is fine.


Perhaps a first world annoyance: can't plug ear buds into my pc unless I want to lie down.  Ear phones are working but sit annoying on my head vs directly over my ear holes and not near as loud as I would prefer. Ehhh? (what did you just say?)

You can get an extender cord at Radio Shack or the like. I used one on my old stereo with no problems for years to route my tv sound through it. Worked fantastic. I'ts pretty cheap too if I remember correctly.

We went with new speakers.  Just a cheap set but since I am getting old and losing hearing as long as I can hear netflix I am not missing out on anything (not like I am musically inclined or anything ;-)) So for when I want to cook or do dishes and be listening to my fav shows on netflix vs just sitting at my desk.

Considering the power pack which was also a surge protector lasted almost 10 years.. we got our moneys worth from it. Now to save up to buy another one: a power strip just does not seem as likely to save my electronics as the pack did. Then again.. I have went through a lot of ~middle priced pcs over the years.  I blame fur and bird dust.  Maybe it was the power pack?
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Shakira on July 31, 2012, 05:53:15 AM
Do NOT say "Oh, it's a cloudy day, won't get sunburned"  :'(.  Doubly dumb because I was at the pool.

I once got a really bad sunburn in February on a not really too sunny day. It was unusually hot that day so I was wearing a tank top and flip flops. (the joys of Florida- it'll be super cold one day and pushing the upper 70's the next)

I have the best relief for sunburns. Get the aloe gel and freeze it in your ice cube trays. Then you can let one melt on your skin! It's a little messy but the relief is worth it!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Midnight Kitty on July 31, 2012, 12:33:40 PM
Do NOT say "Oh, it's a cloudy day, won't get sunburned"  :'(.  Doubly dumb because I was at the pool.

I once got a really bad sunburn in February on a not really too sunny day. It was unusually hot that day so I was wearing a tank top and flip flops. (the joys of Florida- it'll be super cold one day and pushing the upper 70's the next)

I have the best relief for sunburns. Get the aloe gel and freeze it in your ice cube trays. Then you can let one melt on your skin! It's a little messy but the relief is worth it!
I like to use the aloe gel with lidocaine, or, as I like to call it, "soothe-o-caine." My most recent episode with the aloe gel was when we threw a Venus Transit party back in June.  It was 80% overcast which meant we spent a lot more time eating and talking than watching the transit.  I don't know why I wore a tank top and no sunscreen. :o I'm fair and blonde.  I know my skin will change color before your eyes if I'm out in direct afternoon sun.  I was so busy running around, I guess I thought I was moving too fast for the burning rays to penetrate.  ??? Not so much.  Ah-h-h-h, soothe-o-caine.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: snowflake on July 31, 2012, 03:06:34 PM
Today I punched myself in the eye with my hairbrush and now it's distinctly swollen. Do I get the prize for the day?

Ding! Ding! Ding!

This would be a prize I win all the time.  There was that time I was trying to pull one of those elbow supports over my elbow (after banging it after I slid all the way down some stairs and taking my new SIL out in doing so.  :-[)  You know how those pre-made supports are really tight and you have to pull really hard?  Well I lost my grip and punched myself in the nose.  It was black and blue for a week.  The dumb thing is that I doubt I could punch that well if my life depended on it.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: VorFemme on September 13, 2012, 05:42:39 PM
I had a previous coworker who missed work because, while trying to get ready for work after the birth of her first grandchild (& staying up all night) she managed to microsleep while holding her hot curling iron to her bangs....and she was lucky her eyelids were shut.  Because her other DD had to drive her to the ER due to the burn on her eyelids.

I've never used a curling iron while sleepy since.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: mbbored on September 13, 2012, 07:48:28 PM
This afternoon, I was playing hide and go seek with my dog and decided to hide in the coat closet. Except I tripped over something and fell hard, hitting the edge of the folded laundry rack with my ribs on the way down. Now I have a massive bruise, it hurts to lean back and breathe. Yay.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Pippen on September 13, 2012, 08:03:45 PM
This afternoon, I was playing hide and go seek with my dog and decided to hide in the coat closet. Except I tripped over something and fell hard, hitting the edge of the folded laundry rack with my ribs on the way down. Now I have a massive bruise, it hurts to lean back and breathe. Yay.

I hope you haven't cracked a rib. They hurt for about 6 weeks. No laughing for you.

Mine today. I have had to dig out my whole back garden along side the house so the plumber can redo my gully traps. I have unearthed some problems I really wish I hadn't. I will also have to completely resow the back lawn but at least I wasn't the idiot who decided to build a garden 3 feet deep over the drains and box the units with wood.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: mbbored on September 13, 2012, 11:04:56 PM
This afternoon, I was playing hide and go seek with my dog and decided to hide in the coat closet. Except I tripped over something and fell hard, hitting the edge of the folded laundry rack with my ribs on the way down. Now I have a massive bruise, it hurts to lean back and breathe. Yay.

I hope you haven't cracked a rib. They hurt for about 6 weeks. No laughing for you.

Mine today. I have had to dig out my whole back garden along side the house so the plumber can redo my gully traps. I have unearthed some problems I really wish I hadn't. I will also have to completely resow the back lawn but at least I wasn't the idiot who decided to build a garden 3 feet deep over the drains and box the units with wood.

Fun times with the garden. Do you at least know the idiot so you can admonish them appropriately?

As for me, I really hope I didn't crack a rib, though I think it was shock/extreme muscle soreness, since breathing hurts less now. The bruise is currently the size of my spread hand, with burst blood vessels in the morning.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: twiggy on September 14, 2012, 12:20:02 AM
I don't know what prompted this memory, but since it's in my brain, I'll put it in your brains as well.

Men, if you are observant, you will notice that after giving birth to a child who spends approximately 15 hours per day eating and another 5-7 hours shrieking, your wife may be extra stressed and exhausted. Surprising your stressed out, exhausted wife by mopping the floors and cleaning the bathroom (using a whole bunch of very effective, very chemically cleaners, including bleach) is a good and thoughtful idea. You might even succeed in you ulterior motive and your wife may reward your efforts by locking the kids downstairs with a movie so you and she can enjoy some special grown up time. Make sure that if this happens you wash your hands thoroughly!!!! Chemical burns in tender, intimate places are a good way to make sure that your stressed, exhausted wife will never let you touch her again.

Ok, I can't say never after all, said wife did give birth 17 months later.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: violinp on September 14, 2012, 12:35:00 AM
Oh, owwwwww!  :-\
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Amava on September 14, 2012, 02:31:36 AM


Better, even: if you're going to use cleaning products that are /that/ aggressive, best to wear cleaning gloves.
Especially if it is your first day on a student's job as a cleaner, and your supervisor has explicitly and repeatedly warned you to wear these gloves.
Yes, really. Even if "you always clean without gloves at home" or "you feel less handy with gloves".

If you're going to be stubborn and use the products you have been warned against, by the professional, with your bare hands anyway, at first you'll go: "See! Everything ok! It's not burning!"
But an hour after your job is done, and throughout the rest of the evening, small pieces of upper skin will start coming loose from your hands. Seriously, it was like a sort of "peeling" or something. I had never seen that before. And surprised that I was!!

Since then, if a bottle or a pro warns me to be careful with a product, I believe them.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: CrochetFanatic on September 14, 2012, 03:39:24 AM
I can't believe I'm about to tell these...  :-[  But!  I've got insomnia (again) and nothing better to do, so here goes!

This one didn't happen to me, but the poor girl turned beet red.  When I was in Health Class in 7th grade, we were learning about antigens and pathogens.  We were taking turns reading aloud from the textbook; working from one side of the room to the other, the first person in a row would read a paragraph, then the person behind would read the next one, until the row had all had a turn.  Then the next row would start.  Well, the girl sitting in front of me was reading, and the book said something about pathogens being "organisms".  Guess what she said instead of "organisms"?  ;D  The girl gasped and said, "I mean--", there was a split second of stunned silence, then everyone (even the teacher) was absolutely howling with laughter.  Even the girl had to laugh, but she was clearly embarrassed.

This one did happen to me, and it's not a big deal considering the room in which it happened.  It involves bodily functions, though.  One day in high school I was extremely gassy, but I was holding them in.  By the time 1:00 rolled around I was in a considerable amount of discomfort, and I asked for the hall pass.  I went into the bathroom, made sure the door was shut, and finally let myself pass gas.  It was loud, long, and quite a relief.  Next thing I know, I hear some girl smothering a laugh and golf-clapping in the furthest stall from the door.  I had forgotten to make sure I was alone in there...
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Gyburc on September 14, 2012, 05:32:16 AM
I have a new one from DH. He was recently helping his brother out with some landscaping using a rotavator. They were clearing some pretty thick brambles, and the machine was over-heating.

Without thinking, DH put his hand straight down on the engine casing... right onto the safety notice.

No serious damage, but he had 'CAUTION - MAY BE HOT' in reverse visible on his palm for several hours.

 ;D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: mbbored on September 14, 2012, 09:26:44 AM
I have a new one from DH. He was recently helping his brother out with some landscaping using a rotavator. They were clearing some pretty thick brambles, and the machine was over-heating.

Without thinking, DH put his hand straight down on the engine casing... right onto the safety notice.

No serious damage, but he had 'CAUTION - MAY BE HOT' in reverse visible on his palm for several hours.

 ;D

That is truly brilliant. A part of me is flinching for him and the other part is giggling imagining what if he had sat down on it.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: CrochetFanatic on September 14, 2012, 09:47:09 PM
Last month we went to my dad's company picnic.  They have it every year, and you need tickets to get in.  The tickets must be bought in advance, and this was done without a hitch.  The car ride was about 15 to 20 minutes long (give or take), and when we got there my mom asked my dad, "Got the tickets?" 

His response?  "Oh, son of a..."

We had to go back and get them.  To make matters worse, even though I don't get carsick, the road had a lot of bends and twists.  We got home, and I wasn't feeling too extra.  By the time we got back to the park, I was pretty green.  My dad, however, was red.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Adelaide on September 14, 2012, 09:55:10 PM
Today we had an exercise due in class. I have yet to figure out where/when these other people got this piece of paper, but we were discussing it in terms of categories. So people would say "I think it's related to issue 1" and the teacher would say "good, why not issue 2?" In other words, zero context clues.

I sat there holding my breath for an hour and pretending to scratch down notes on the assignment, which was actually my copy of the syllabus. Every now and then I would nod sagely as if I had a clue what was going on.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: KenveeB on September 14, 2012, 09:59:47 PM
Last month we went to my dad's company picnic.  They have it every year, and you need tickets to get in.  The tickets must be bought in advance, and this was done without a hitch.  The car ride was about 15 to 20 minutes long (give or take), and when we got there my mom asked my dad, "Got the tickets?" 

His response?  "Oh, son of a..."

We had to go back and get them.  To make matters worse, even though I don't get carsick, the road had a lot of bends and twists.  We got home, and I wasn't feeling too extra.  By the time we got back to the park, I was pretty green.  My dad, however, was red.

My dad and I were traveling in Europe, and he got annoyed with me when I asked him every time we left for somewhere "do you have your passport?" So as we got on the train from Munich to Salzburg, I didn't say anything. Halfway there, he suddenly realized that he had actually forgotten his passport. I got off at Salzburg as planned, and he rode all the way back to Munich and had to talk his way through to actually go get his passport from our hotel where he'd left it. (I didn't think they'd let him back!) I was in Salzburg for about 4 hours or so on my own waiting for him. 

He didn't get mad at me for asking if he had his passport the rest of the trip. :)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jpcher on September 15, 2012, 01:57:38 PM
Many years ago, before 9/11, LDH, the DDs and I were taking a trip via airplane.

During the rush of final packing and getting to the airport on time I kept asking LDH "You have the tickets, right?" To the point where it irritated him, so I finally kept my mouth shut.

One of the last things I did was switch out purses.

We get to the check-in point to check our luggage get seat assignments and boarding passes.

They asked for ID. I look in my purse, no drivers license. All I had was a marriage certificate (don't ask ::)) a couple of credit cards and a library card.

I'm not even going to try to describe the look on LDH's face as he quietly tapped on the tickets that I nagged him about.

Fortunately, like I said it was before 9/11 . . . the counter guy called over his manager who looked at the ID I had. Manager looked at the marriage certificate, then at my husband and asked him "Will you vouch for her as your wife?" LDH's response was a painful "Do I have to?"

They let me on the plane with a warning that I would need a photo ID for my return trip. They suggested that I go to a SAMs club at my destination, sign up for a membership in order to get a photo ID.


Yeah. I felt pretty stupid that day.



P.S. I was able to call the friend that was cat-sitting for us, told him where my drivers license was (with banking stuff I did the day before) and he fed-exed it to me for my return trip.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Luci on September 15, 2012, 04:36:15 PM
Son was in the university marching band and we were taking him to catch the bus to perform in a Bowl game, about a 3 hour drive from home to the university. Son was driving, husband was riding shotgun and I was peacefully crocheting in the back seat, when about 30 minutes into the the trip I said jokingly, "Did you pack your uniform?"

I don't know how we made it home and back to the bus in time!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: squeakers on September 23, 2012, 01:48:48 PM
We were headed to Des Moines to do Adventureland with my sister and her family.  2 vans full of kids and adults on a 3 hour trip.  An hour down the road we realized we had left the pre-paid gate tickets at home.  We pulled off the interstate, the menfolk jumped into one vehicle and went quickly home to get them. Adding 2 hours to our drive (sure, we women could have tried driving on and waiting for them.. but too many kids for 1 van and frankly we didn't even think about it until later that some of the older kids could have rode with the guys because the older kids were entertaining the younger kids.)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: greencat on September 23, 2012, 09:59:32 PM
Trying to flip a 40 pound board over while I was holding it parallel to the ground at chest height.  I lost my grip because of the way I was holding it and the way I tried to flip it, and dropped it.  I moved fast enough to avoid having it land on my feet and break something, but it bounced off my thigh and left a fairly impressive bruise - raised about half an inch and bigger than an egg!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Pippen on September 23, 2012, 11:52:45 PM
Trying to flip a 40 pound board over while I was holding it parallel to the ground at chest height.  I lost my grip because of the way I was holding it and the way I tried to flip it, and dropped it.  I moved fast enough to avoid having it land on my feet and break something, but it bounced off my thigh and left a fairly impressive bruise - raised about half an inch and bigger than an egg!

I was trying to take down some shelving in the attic and all the screws were different heads and so I had most of the out and couldn't be bothered faffing around so I thought 'Stuff it. I'll just kick it down' Cue the shelf coming flying back hitting me in the face and then taking off half my shin for good measure. I have no sympathy for myself. I am a horses rear end.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: GreenEyedHawk on September 25, 2012, 07:53:53 PM
Trying to flip a 40 pound board over while I was holding it parallel to the ground at chest height.  I lost my grip because of the way I was holding it and the way I tried to flip it, and dropped it.  I moved fast enough to avoid having it land on my feet and break something, but it bounced off my thigh and left a fairly impressive bruise - raised about half an inch and bigger than an egg!

I was trying to take down some shelving in the attic and all the screws were different heads and so I had most of the out and couldn't be bothered faffing around so I thought 'Stuff it. I'll just kick it down' Cue the shelf coming flying back hitting me in the face and then taking off half my shin for good measure. I have no sympathy for myself. I am a horses rear end.

I once went to put my parents' dog out on his long tie-out (back yard not fully fenced) which hung on a small hook low to the ground.  When I straightened up, I whacked my head on the doorknob.  Angry at both myself and the door, I yelled a not-very-polite word and kicked the door as hard as I could, breaking two toes.  The door rebounded and the knob nailed me right on the hip, leaving a huge bruise besides.

I am also a horse's rear end.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Pippen on September 25, 2012, 07:57:49 PM
Trying to flip a 40 pound board over while I was holding it parallel to the ground at chest height.  I lost my grip because of the way I was holding it and the way I tried to flip it, and dropped it.  I moved fast enough to avoid having it land on my feet and break something, but it bounced off my thigh and left a fairly impressive bruise - raised about half an inch and bigger than an egg!

I was trying to take down some shelving in the attic and all the screws were different heads and so I had most of the out and couldn't be bothered faffing around so I thought 'Stuff it. I'll just kick it down' Cue the shelf coming flying back hitting me in the face and then taking off half my shin for good measure. I have no sympathy for myself. I am a horses rear end.

I once went to put my parents' dog out on his long tie-out (back yard not fully fenced) which hung on a small hook low to the ground.  When I straightened up, I whacked my head on the doorknob.  Angry at both myself and the door, I yelled a not-very-polite word and kicked the door as hard as I could, breaking two toes.  The door rebounded and the knob nailed me right on the hip, leaving a huge bruise besides.

I am also a horse's rear end.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: siamesecat2965 on September 25, 2012, 08:00:23 PM
Trying to flip a 40 pound board over while I was holding it parallel to the ground at chest height.  I lost my grip because of the way I was holding it and the way I tried to flip it, and dropped it.  I moved fast enough to avoid having it land on my feet and break something, but it bounced off my thigh and left a fairly impressive bruise - raised about half an inch and bigger than an egg!

I was trying to take down some shelving in the attic and all the screws were different heads and so I had most of the out and couldn't be bothered faffing around so I thought 'Stuff it. I'll just kick it down' Cue the shelf coming flying back hitting me in the face and then taking off half my shin for good measure. I have no sympathy for myself. I am a horses rear end.

I once went to put my parents' dog out on his long tie-out (back yard not fully fenced) which hung on a small hook low to the ground.  When I straightened up, I whacked my head on the doorknob.  Angry at both myself and the door, I yelled a not-very-polite word and kicked the door as hard as I could, breaking two toes.  The door rebounded and the knob nailed me right on the hip, leaving a huge bruise besides.

I am also a horse's rear end.

All of these have me laughing like a hyena, not because of what you did, but HOW you did it, as I am the queen of klutzeness.

this one though, is courtesy of my mom.  she is in a wheelchair, and also hard of hearing so she wears hearing aids.  She also has bad allergies and post nasal drip, which will sometimes give her coughing fits in the middle of hte night.  so she has one, and sits up and is fumbling on her nightstand for a tissue to blow her nose.

She feels something go "ping" and onto the floor, but doesn't know exactly what.  In the morning, she gets up, gets into her chair, and CRUNCH, runs over that something she knocked on the floor.  Which turned out to be her hearing aid!  it was beyond repair and I cracked up hysterically when she told me, again, not what she did, but how she did it. After having to spend a couple thousand on a new one, she is now VERY careful as to where she puts them at night!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: katycoo on September 25, 2012, 10:51:15 PM
My personal best effort - I had just purchased a new cigarette lighter, but it didn't seem to be working.  It was one of those ones without a wheel - the safety was that you had to push in the latch to depress the spark.
Someone suggested I hold it up to my ear to hear if the gas was flowing.  So I held it up to my ear, and sparked it, where it promptly set fire to my hair.  Not in a serious manner, but still...

Now, I don't know if I missed the "let it cool a while first" instruction, but boiling hot stock + very cold bowl = booom!

This is very similar to something stupid I did.  Mine was a collective of stupid.  Myself, DH and 2 friends (ALL SOBER) were making mulled wine on the stove top.  Its finished, and we're getting ready to serve, and I toguht "wouldn't this be prettier if it was in a jug, and not a saucepan?"  So I grabbed a glass jug (and wedding gift) and poured the boiling hot liquid into it.

THe very thick base of the base blew off.  Thank goodness it was in the sink so we didn't all getcovered with glass and hot liquid!

I still can't fathom how not one of us didn't twig that it was a bad idead.

I was trying to boil sugar once, but my candy thermometer said it wasn't getting hot and it wasn't boiling at that point so I brilliantly stuck my finger into the pot to see if it was hot.  It was.  I ended up sleeping with a piece of Aloe on my finger.

I think we've all done that "Is this thing hot?" *touch* YES!

Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Bluenomi on September 25, 2012, 11:54:18 PM
Last month we went to my dad's company picnic.  They have it every year, and you need tickets to get in.  The tickets must be bought in advance, and this was done without a hitch.  The car ride was about 15 to 20 minutes long (give or take), and when we got there my mom asked my dad, "Got the tickets?" 

His response?  "Oh, son of a..."

We had to go back and get them.  To make matters worse, even though I don't get carsick, the road had a lot of bends and twists.  We got home, and I wasn't feeling too extra.  By the time we got back to the park, I was pretty green.  My dad, however, was red.

My dad and I were traveling in Europe, and he got annoyed with me when I asked him every time we left for somewhere "do you have your passport?" So as we got on the train from Munich to Salzburg, I didn't say anything. Halfway there, he suddenly realized that he had actually forgotten his passport. I got off at Salzburg as planned, and he rode all the way back to Munich and had to talk his way through to actually go get his passport from our hotel where he'd left it. (I didn't think they'd let him back!) I was in Salzburg for about 4 hours or so on my own waiting for him. 

He didn't get mad at me for asking if he had his passport the rest of the trip. :)

I once had a trip where I visited my parents for a few days before going overseas. On the morning Dad was going to drive me the hour or so to the airport I realised my passport was still at home, a 5 hour drive away.

Thank goodness my flat mate was at home and not doing anything with her public holiday that day. She grabbed my passport and drove to a town 2.5 hours from our place and Dad and I drove there to meet her. I got the passport off her (complete with a smack around the head for being a twit) and we raced to the airport and I just made check in on time.

Flatmate and Dad both got awesome presents when I got home!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: CrochetFanatic on September 26, 2012, 01:19:33 AM
I did something sort of absent minded tonight.  I have dinner planned for tomorrow; spaghetti with homemade sauce, and garlic cheese bread.  Well, I thought I'd make the garlic oil ahead of time so that I wouldn't have to do it tomorrow, and I was busy talking back and forth to someone in the living room as I was filling the blender.  For the garlic oil, it's about 8 cloves of garlic, the leaves from 6 to 8 fresh sprigs of parsley, and about a half-cup of olive oil.  I got distracted while I was talking, and I started the blender before I realized I had forgotten to peel the garlic.  Oops...

Probably wouldn't have hurt anyone to eat it, but I threw it away and started over.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: RebeccainGA on September 26, 2012, 08:22:36 AM
I will never live down my mother's hysterical laughter (as she wrapped my hand in a towel) after nearly cutting my finger to the bone with children's plastic safety scissors, at the ripe old age of 12.

Nor my father's look of horror when we were trying to pull in a boat to shore (small powerboat, beaching it to fix a problem with a bench) and I wrapped the rope around my hand for a better grip - except that I was on the FRONT of the line, not the back, and mom and sister were hauling away on the back end of said rope.

It's frankly a miracle I'm alive, and haven't accidentally decapitated myself with my moonroof or something.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Cami on September 26, 2012, 09:37:28 AM
Son was in the university marching band and we were taking him to catch the bus to perform in a Bowl game, about a 3 hour drive from home to the university. Son was driving, husband was riding shotgun and I was peacefully crocheting in the back seat, when about 30 minutes into the the trip I said jokingly, "Did you pack your uniform?"

I don't know how we made it home and back to the bus in time!

Many years ago, we were driving from our home to my parents' house to stay there overnight before dh had to go into large neighboring city the next morning for a job interview. The drive from our home to my parents' house was 4 hours. My dh is not the world's best packer, but had gotten frustrated with me asking him, "Do you have your belt/dress shoes/tie?" So when we were leaving the house that  morning and I asked, "Did you remember--" He interrupted me with a protest, "Stop asking me! I'm not a child." Okay, fine. So we get to my parents' house and are bringing our stuff in and my mother asks him, "So what suit are you wearing tomorrow?"

Dead silence.

He forgot the suit back home. It was now too late to go to a local store since it was past closing time. He had to get back into his car and drive four hours there and then four hours back.

I may have smirked a little.

The next time we're going somewhere, I again begin to ask him, "Did you remember--" And he -- foolish man -- cuts me off and insists he's got everything. About an hour into the drive, he lets out this deep sigh and pulls the car over to turn it around. I naturally ask what's wrong and he says, sheepishly, "I forgot my suit again."
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Diane AKA Traska on September 26, 2012, 09:41:42 AM
Son was in the university marching band and we were taking him to catch the bus to perform in a Bowl game, about a 3 hour drive from home to the university. Son was driving, husband was riding shotgun and I was peacefully crocheting in the back seat, when about 30 minutes into the the trip I said jokingly, "Did you pack your uniform?"

I don't know how we made it home and back to the bus in time!

Many years ago, we were driving from our home to my parents' house to stay there overnight before dh had to go into large neighboring city the next morning for a job interview. The drive from our home to my parents' house was 4 hours. My dh is not the world's best packer, but had gotten frustrated with me asking him, "Do you have your belt/dress shoes/tie?" So when we were leaving the house that  morning and I asked, "Did you remember--" He interrupted me with a protest, "Stop asking me! I'm not a child." Okay, fine. So we get to my parents' house and are bringing our stuff in and my mother asks him, "So what suit are you wearing tomorrow?"

Dead silence.

He forgot the suit back home. It was now too late to go to a local store since it was past closing time. He had to get back into his car and drive four hours there and then four hours back.

I may have smirked a little.

The next time we're going somewhere, I again begin to ask him, "Did you remember--" And he -- foolish man -- cuts me off and insists he's got everything. About an hour into the drive, he lets out this deep sigh and pulls the car over to turn it around. I naturally ask what's wrong and he says, sheepishly, "I forgot my suit again."

Revenge is a dish best served to those you love.  :D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: CakeBeret on September 26, 2012, 10:21:13 AM
I think we've all done that "Is this thing hot?" *touch* YES!

Reminds me of my 2-year-old when we were trying to teach him to stay away from the stove. I was cooking pancakes and he walked up and poked the skillet saying "Dat's hot". Then screeched, because the skillet WAS actually hot and he had burned his finger. ::)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Layla Miller on September 26, 2012, 10:48:15 AM
I think we've all done that "Is this thing hot?" *touch* YES!

Reminds me of my 2-year-old when we were trying to teach him to stay away from the stove. I was cooking pancakes and he walked up and poked the skillet saying "Dat's hot". Then screeched, because the skillet WAS actually hot and he had burned his finger. ::)

My best friend was once in the kitchen with her daughter (about a year and a half) and her niece (about three or four years old), cooking on the stove.  Niece kept messing around near the stove in spite of my friend's warnings to keep her distance, and her daughter even kept saying "Hot!  Hot!"

Niece ended up touching the stove and getting (minorly) burned, and we still find it amusing that a barely-even-toddler had figured it out where the old-enough-to-know-better had not.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Starchasm on September 26, 2012, 12:28:55 PM
My most memorable one to date was the day I accidentally flushed some underpants down our toilet.

I AM SO GLAD I'M NOT THE ONLY PERSON THAT'S DONE THIS!!!!  ;D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: curly sue on September 26, 2012, 12:47:31 PM
My most memorable one to date was the day I accidentally flushed some underpants down our toilet.

I AM SO GLAD I'M NOT THE ONLY PERSON THAT'S DONE THIS!!!!  ;D

I didn't flush the underpants down the toilet but I think mine is worse. I forgot to pull the underpants off before I used the potty. At least it was only pee! But, I have to be the only person on the whole earth to pee my  underpants while sitting on the toilet!!!!

I did have to take them off and throw them away. I had no way to clean them up because I was at work.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: alkira6 on September 26, 2012, 12:54:09 PM
My most memorable one to date was the day I accidentally flushed some underpants down our toilet.

I AM SO GLAD I'M NOT THE ONLY PERSON THAT'S DONE THIS!!!!  ;D

I didn't flush the underpants down the toilet but I think mine is worse. I forgot to pull the underpants off before I used the potty. At least it was only pee! But, I have to be the only person on the whole earth to pee my  underpants while sitting on the toilet!!!!

I did have to take them off and throw them away. I had no way to clean them up because I was at work.

Raised hand  :-[ I did this - long drive home. I rushed into the house, pulled down my pants, and sat down with a long sigh of relief only to realize that I forgot the undies.  DH still cracks jokes about that.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: curly sue on September 26, 2012, 12:59:46 PM
My most memorable one to date was the day I accidentally flushed some underpants down our toilet.

I AM SO GLAD I'M NOT THE ONLY PERSON THAT'S DONE THIS!!!!  ;D

I didn't flush the underpants down the toilet but I think mine is worse. I forgot to pull the underpants off before I used the potty. At least it was only pee! But, I have to be the only person on the whole earth to pee my  underpants while sitting on the toilet!!!!

I did have to take them off and throw them away. I had no way to clean them up because I was at work.

Raised hand  :-[ I did this - long drive home. I rushed into the house, pulled down my pants, and sat down with a long sigh of relief only to realize that I forgot the undies.  DH still cracks jokes about that.

Well, we can have some comfort in the fact that we are not alone in our moment of trouble.  ;)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: siamesecat2965 on September 26, 2012, 01:42:56 PM
I almost did something dumb, but at the last moment, avoided danger.  I was at the laundromat, and i liked to start the machine, let some water go in, add my detergent, and then add the clothes.  So one day I start it up,and see wht I think is a leaf in the bottom.  I reached in and went to pick it up when it MOVED.  It was a bat.  I screamed and ran away.  The laundromat attendant got it out, and then went about my merry way, since I had already put $$ in, and I wasn't going to waste it!  I figured the water would kill any bat germs.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Diane AKA Traska on September 26, 2012, 02:12:49 PM
I almost did something dumb, but at the last moment, avoided danger.  I was at the laundromat, and i liked to start the machine, let some water go in, add my detergent, and then add the clothes.  So one day I start it up,and see wht I think is a leaf in the bottom.  I reached in and went to pick it up when it MOVED.  It was a bat.  I screamed and ran away.  The laundromat attendant got it out, and then went about my merry way, since I had already put $$ in, and I wasn't going to waste it!  I figured the water would kill any bat germs.

I am vengeance!
I am the night!
I AM BAT GERMS!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: tiff019 on September 26, 2012, 02:23:33 PM
My most memorable one to date was the day I accidentally flushed some underpants down our toilet.

I AM SO GLAD I'M NOT THE ONLY PERSON THAT'S DONE THIS!!!!  ;D

I didn't flush the underpants down the toilet but I think mine is worse. I forgot to pull the underpants off before I used the potty. At least it was only pee! But, I have to be the only person on the whole earth to pee my  underpants while sitting on the toilet!!!!

I did have to take them off and throw them away. I had no way to clean them up because I was at work.

You're not... but I did it at home, so I could rinse them out and throw them in the wash...
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Moonie on September 26, 2012, 02:37:07 PM
I have mobility issues, so I use a cane to help me walk. I am also large, so the cane I have is a bariatric cane and is very heavy. One night I was in the recliner, and as I got up, the footrest wouldn't go back into position, so I got it down as far as I could, stood up, and went to use my cane to push the footrest the rest of the way in. I bent over, grabbed the cane, positioned it between my feet and whacked it. Only thing was, being bent over, I whacked myself in the side of the head....HARD. Hard enough to see stars!!! I had a knot on my right temple for a week. Now I know what to use as a weapon in case I get mugged.  ;D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Bijou on September 26, 2012, 03:01:03 PM
I forgot to refrigerate a Finnish stew that had milk, onions, potatoes and salted salmon in it and I ate some the next day.  I think it was in my stomach for, oh, maybe 30 seconds.  I was young and inexperienced but I still cannot believe I was that foolish.  I think that is why I am so very careful about food preparation and storage. 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Pippen on September 26, 2012, 03:05:19 PM
does anyone else have the experience of knowing it is a very poor idea as soon as you start but for some reason being unable to stop yourself? Almost like the rational and evolved part of your brain gets overridden by your critter brain.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: violinp on September 26, 2012, 03:36:02 PM
I have mobility issues, so I use a cane to help me walk. I am also large, so the cane I have is a bariatric cane and is very heavy. One night I was in the recliner, and as I got up, the footrest wouldn't go back into position, so I got it down as far as I could, stood up, and went to use my cane to push the footrest the rest of the way in. I bent over, grabbed the cane, positioned it between my feet and whacked it. Only thing was, being bent over, I whacked myself in the side of the head....HARD. Hard enough to see stars!!! I had a knot on my right temple for a week. Now I know what to use as a weapon in case I get mugged.  ;D

OUCH!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: bansidhe on September 26, 2012, 05:09:29 PM
My personal best effort - I had just purchased a new cigarette lighter, but it didn't seem to be working.  It was one of those ones without a wheel - the safety was that you had to push in the latch to depress the spark.
Someone suggested I hold it up to my ear to hear if the gas was flowing.  So I held it up to my ear, and sparked it, where it promptly set fire to my hair.  Not in a serious manner, but still...

That reminds me: A couple of years ago, I acquired a red-eared slider (aquatic turtle) who was a stray or had been dumped by her owners. She was a big girl - about a foot long. Her behavior made me suspect she might have an upper respiratory infection and when I picked her up to examine her, I thought I heard her wheezing a bit.

To verify that I'd heard wheezing, I held her head right up to my ear so I could hear better. She bit my ear, hard, and refused to let go for some time. There was blood involved. Good thing she was a slider and not a snapping turtle...
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Kimblee on September 26, 2012, 06:35:28 PM
My personal best effort - I had just purchased a new cigarette lighter, but it didn't seem to be working.  It was one of those ones without a wheel - the safety was that you had to push in the latch to depress the spark.
Someone suggested I hold it up to my ear to hear if the gas was flowing.  So I held it up to my ear, and sparked it, where it promptly set fire to my hair.  Not in a serious manner, but still...

That reminds me: A couple of years ago, I acquired a red-eared slider (aquatic turtle) who was a stray or had been dumped by her owners. She was a big girl - about a foot long. Her behavior made me suspect she might have an upper respiratory infection and when I picked her up to examine her, I thought I heard her wheezing a bit.

To verify that I'd heard wheezing, I held her head right up to my ear so I could hear better. She bit my ear, hard, and refused to let go for some time. There was blood involved. Good thing she was a slider and not a snapping turtle...

BWAHAHAAAA!

Sorry. I just am so glad I'm not the only person to be biten by a pet turtle because of my own darn foolishness.

I have a box turtle who is VERY bitey. Nasty fellow, pretty but nasty. He was poked a lot with a stick before he became mine. One day I decided I needed to make friends with my Nasty Fellow. So I did what I do any time I need to make friend with a box turtle and I grabbed a strawberry. I sat on the floor with him (and bare, red toenailed feet, this is important) and offered him the berry. He took a bite and I felt good. Then he took a bite out of my big toe. Not so good. I grabbed at my foot and he bit my thumb. I picked him up and held him in a way that he couldn't reach me any more (he tried though, poor guy. Very determined.) and laughed at him. Then I put him down for a minute to open the tank he spends his winters in to put him back (it takes two hands) and he bit my foot again.

Mean, Mean little turtle. Astonishingly I still love him. Pretty sure he doesn't feel the same.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Bluenomi on September 26, 2012, 06:43:50 PM
Son was in the university marching band and we were taking him to catch the bus to perform in a Bowl game, about a 3 hour drive from home to the university. Son was driving, husband was riding shotgun and I was peacefully crocheting in the back seat, when about 30 minutes into the the trip I said jokingly, "Did you pack your uniform?"

I don't know how we made it home and back to the bus in time!

Many years ago, we were driving from our home to my parents' house to stay there overnight before dh had to go into large neighboring city the next morning for a job interview. The drive from our home to my parents' house was 4 hours. My dh is not the world's best packer, but had gotten frustrated with me asking him, "Do you have your belt/dress shoes/tie?" So when we were leaving the house that  morning and I asked, "Did you remember--" He interrupted me with a protest, "Stop asking me! I'm not a child." Okay, fine. So we get to my parents' house and are bringing our stuff in and my mother asks him, "So what suit are you wearing tomorrow?"

Dead silence.

He forgot the suit back home. It was now too late to go to a local store since it was past closing time. He had to get back into his car and drive four hours there and then four hours back.

I may have smirked a little.

The next time we're going somewhere, I again begin to ask him, "Did you remember--" And he -- foolish man -- cuts me off and insists he's got everything. About an hour into the drive, he lets out this deep sigh and pulls the car over to turn it around. I naturally ask what's wrong and he says, sheepishly, "I forgot my suit again."

I always ask DH if he was remembered his shorts after one trip to my parents where he forgot them and had to spend a few hot sweaty days in jeans.  ;D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: White Dragon on September 26, 2012, 07:34:22 PM
Last month my coworker went out of town for two weeks.

Then he came home and ate the leftover spaghetti in his fridge.

Coworker's return to work was delayed due to the resulting food poisoning. :P
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Starchasm on September 26, 2012, 07:46:38 PM
I went to Vegas with my boyfriend.  It was supposed to be a great, romantic week.  We had a suite-ish type room that had a little wall that separated the sink area from the bedroom area.  The bathroom was in this little enclosure.  In the middle of the night, blind from being in the bathroom with the light on, I SMACKED into that little wall.  I broke my nose.  Dinner at Le Cirque with two black eyes?  Not so romantic.

At the beach I somehow managed to put sunscreen everywhere on my body except for my right shoulder.  By the time I figured this out I had a really impressive sunburn (I am SUPER pale).  You can even see my finger marks where I smudged around the other sunscreen.  NO IDEA how I didn't make it to that shoulder!

When I first got my second dog they used to fight a lot.  One morning they woke me up going at it really fiercely.  I (still wearing my sleep mask) misjudged the severity of the fight and tried to break them up.  With my hands.  There was a really weird sensation in my thumb where I thought, "Oh, THAT's not right," and the dogs stopped fighting immediately.

One of the dogs' canine teeth had gone straight through my thumbnail.  I managed to make it out of my bedroom before I got woozy.  I called my roommate from the living room floor so he could come take me to the ER.  The ER triage nurse acted like I was a wuss when I explained what happened until I took the towel off my hand.  His reaction?  "HOLY CRAP!"

It took a long time to heal but the dogs haven't fought since.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: katycoo on September 26, 2012, 11:20:18 PM
Last night, I had the potential to have a very bad experience...luckily it turned out good.  My kids gave me a rotisserie for christmas, and we decided to try it out.  After cooking the pork tenderloin (which turned out fantastic!) I used the special tool to take it out of the rotisserie, but it still had the metal skewer running through it.  Without thinking, I grabbed the skewer with my bare hands. 

For some reason, the metal wasn't super hot.  I am happy to say I wasn't burnt!

My husband does that every. time. without fail with the meat thermometer.  Remove meat from cooking thing with appropriate protection, then while looking at it on the bench think "That's needs to come out" and promptly grabs it with his bare hand.  Every time.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: turtleIScream on September 27, 2012, 04:26:05 PM
A few weeks ago, my sister and I took our sons for a walk, including a stop at the hardware store so she could get her mower blade sharpened. We made sure to instruct the boys to stay away from the sharp blade, and were careful to keep it out of their reach. I somehow forgot to apply this logic to me. Absorbed in a riveting story she was telling me, I forgot my sister was carrying a mower blade, and that she likes to talk with her hands. Suddenly, I see something metallic under my nose and go past my ear, missing me by about 3 inches. Always make sure hands-talkers aren't holding anything before starting a conversation!

Another stupid thing I've done - I was ironing, and bumped the ironing board. The iron started to fall to the hard tile floor. I didn't want either it or the tile to break, so I grabbed the iron mid-fall. Just not by the cool handle. Ow.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Dazi on September 27, 2012, 06:37:13 PM
I almost did something dumb, but at the last moment, avoided danger.  I was at the laundromat, and i liked to start the machine, let some water go in, add my detergent, and then add the clothes.  So one day I start it up,and see wht I think is a leaf in the bottom.  I reached in and went to pick it up when it MOVED.  It was a bat.  I screamed and ran away.  The laundromat attendant got it out, and then went about my merry way, since I had already put $$ in, and I wasn't going to waste it!  I figured the water would kill any bat germs.

That reminds me of a memorable evening from long, long ago, in one of my apartments.
I was sitting in the living room and saw a brownie crumb on the other chair, so I reached over to pick up up and throw it away.......and it wrapped it's little legs around my finger....

There was a lot of jumping and screaming, and I never knew where that little brown spider ended up, but I can't think about that moment without shuddering.

I just nearly fell out of my chair...just as I was reading the spider part, my sweet, rotten kitty nailed me with his tail just behind my knee.  Scared the beejeepers out of me.  He is sitting here with a rather bemused look. 

I really, really don't like spiders.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Outdoor Girl on September 27, 2012, 07:47:39 PM
As I was getting ready for bed last night, I happened to look at the toilet and saw a spot just at the edge of the seat at the back of the hole.  So I turned away to grab something to clean it with and when I looked back, it was gone.  I lifted the seat and there was a spider there!  I squished it with some toilet paper, threw it in the toilet, flushed, and then went to the bathroom.

*shudder*
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: greencat on September 27, 2012, 08:24:05 PM
My most memorable one to date was the day I accidentally flushed some underpants down our toilet.

I AM SO GLAD I'M NOT THE ONLY PERSON THAT'S DONE THIS!!!!  ;D

I didn't flush the underpants down the toilet but I think mine is worse. I forgot to pull the underpants off before I used the potty. At least it was only pee! But, I have to be the only person on the whole earth to pee my  underpants while sitting on the toilet!!!!

I did have to take them off and throw them away. I had no way to clean them up because I was at work.

Raised hand  :-[ I did this - long drive home. I rushed into the house, pulled down my pants, and sat down with a long sigh of relief only to realize that I forgot the undies.  DH still cracks jokes about that.

Well, we can have some comfort in the fact that we are not alone in our moment of trouble.  ;)

Due to being most of the way asleep and not realizing that one of the housemates had put the lid down, once I sat down on theclosed lid and started going.  Easier to clean up than undies though...
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Gyburc on September 28, 2012, 06:11:58 AM
I have a new one from DH. He was recently helping his brother out with some landscaping using a rotavator. They were clearing some pretty thick brambles, and the machine was over-heating.

Without thinking, DH put his hand straight down on the engine casing... right onto the safety notice.

No serious damage, but he had 'CAUTION - MAY BE HOT' in reverse visible on his palm for several hours.

 ;D

That is truly brilliant. A part of me is flinching for him and the other part is giggling imagining what if he had sat down on it.

 >:D >:D >:D

Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Dazi on September 29, 2012, 03:54:54 PM
A few weeks ago I bought a container of Oxi Clean while grocery shopping. 

I went to do a load of clothes and couldn't find it anywhere.  I gave up and went back to the store to buy another container.  I thought I must have forgot it or it didn't make it into my cart.

Digging around in the freezer, I came across a container still in the plastic bag.  I rarely buy junk food and was wondering when I bought icecream.  I didn't remember buying icecream, but it sounded like a nice treat on a hot day.

It wasn't icecream.  I'll give y'all one guess what it was.    :P  Oxi Clean and a half gallon iceream container look nearly identical through plastic.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: violinp on September 29, 2012, 04:36:45 PM
A few weeks ago I bought a container of Oxi Clean while grocery shopping. 

I went to do a load of clothes and couldn't find it anywhere.  I gave up and went back to the store to buy another container.  I thought I must have forgot it or it didn't make it into my cart.

Digging around in the freezer, I came across a container still in the plastic bag.  I rarely buy junk food and was wondering when I bought icecream.  I didn't remember buying icecream, but it sounded like a nice treat on a hot day.

It wasn't icecream.  I'll give y'all one guess what it was.    :P  Oxi Clean and a half gallon iceream container look nearly identical through plastic.

Please tell me you didn't eat it... *shudder*
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: greencat on September 29, 2012, 04:49:33 PM
A few weeks ago I bought a container of Oxi Clean while grocery shopping. 

I went to do a load of clothes and couldn't find it anywhere.  I gave up and went back to the store to buy another container.  I thought I must have forgot it or it didn't make it into my cart.

Digging around in the freezer, I came across a container still in the plastic bag.  I rarely buy junk food and was wondering when I bought icecream.  I didn't remember buying icecream, but it sounded like a nice treat on a hot day.

It wasn't icecream.  I'll give y'all one guess what it was.    :P  Oxi Clean and a half gallon iceream container look nearly identical through plastic.

Please tell me you didn't eat it... *shudder*

Although if you did, can you please tell us what it tasted like?  >:D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Dazi on September 29, 2012, 09:58:59 PM
No I didn't eat it   ;)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: violinp on September 29, 2012, 10:13:36 PM
No I didn't eat it   ;)

Whew! Good to know.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Luci on September 29, 2012, 10:26:18 PM
It tastes pretty much like powdered laundry detergent but a little sharper.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: CrochetFanatic on September 30, 2012, 05:52:59 AM
Okay, this sort of thing happens frequently with us if we don't go out with a shopping list.  In either case, we usually end up buying more than we intended to buy when we're grocery shopping.  Yesterday, my dad and I went out to get stuff for this week's meals.  We went out primarily with chicken breast in mind, but no shopping list.  We came home with everything else we needed, and then some, but no chicken breast.  I think we've got some in the freezer, though, so we're good.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: blue2000 on September 30, 2012, 07:19:30 AM
It tastes pretty much like powdered laundry detergent but a little sharper.


 ;D ;D ;D

And how exactly do you know that??
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: HorseFreak on September 30, 2012, 08:35:04 AM
I've decided I'm not allowed to make recipe substitutions anymore. My mom sent me a Duncan Hines Red Velvet cupcake mix so I decided to make it yesterday. It called for a 1/2 stick of butter to make the frosting and I don't normally keep butter at home. When I went grocery shopping they only had entire pounds for $3-4. I'm broke and refuse to have 3/4 of a pound of something I'm unlikely to use to I decided to substitute coconut oil. This was actually going fine and making a nice, creamy frosting until I added the water the recipe called for. Big mistake. The frosting starting to curdle into little pieces that resembled cottage cheese and sprayed everywhere with the electric mixer. I managed to squeeze them together in the bag, but it would not stick to the cupcakes no matter what I did and dried out in little white Cheeto-shaped chunks.

They're still delicious, but I have to add frosting chunks to each bite of my cupcakes. So much for bringing them to work so I don't eat them all!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Luci on September 30, 2012, 08:40:49 AM
It tastes pretty much like powdered laundry detergent but a little sharper.


 ;D ;D ;D

And how exactly do you know that??

I my younger days-------------I once opened a small sample of powdered laundry detergent with my teeth. I got a clean colon from that one, by the way.

Recently, I was using Oxyclean as a stain remover and didn't rinse my hands well enough before I ate a strawberry with my fingers. Yes, I, who am almost obsessive about clean hands, did that.

You were hoping for something more interesting, I bet.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Luci on September 30, 2012, 08:41:16 AM
It tastes pretty much like powdered laundry detergent but a little sharper.


 ;D ;D ;D

And how exactly do you know that??


I my younger days-------------I once opened a small sample of powdered laundry detergent with my teeth. I got a clean colon from that one, by the way.

Recently, I was using Oxyclean as a stain remover and didn't rinse my hands well enough before I ate a strawberry with my fingers. Yes, I, who am almost obsessive about clean hands, did that.

You were hoping for something more interesting, I bet.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: blue2000 on September 30, 2012, 01:27:01 PM
It tastes pretty much like powdered laundry detergent but a little sharper.


 ;D ;D ;D

And how exactly do you know that??


I my younger days-------------I once opened a small sample of powdered laundry detergent with my teeth. I got a clean colon from that one, by the way.

Recently, I was using Oxyclean as a stain remover and didn't rinse my hands well enough before I ate a strawberry with my fingers. Yes, I, who am almost obsessive about clean hands, did that.

You were hoping for something more interesting, I bet.

LOL! That's quite interesting enough! No need for any further taste tests. ;)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: QueenofAllThings on September 30, 2012, 03:14:17 PM
Yesterday I tried to start my car with the key to my liquor cabinet.

I'm not really sure WHAT that says about me.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: mbbored on September 30, 2012, 03:35:26 PM
Yesterday I tried to start my car with the key to my liquor cabinet.

I'm not really sure WHAT that says about me.

That you throw an awesome party.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: QueenofAllThings on September 30, 2012, 04:58:59 PM
 ;D ;D

I do indeed!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Sirius on September 30, 2012, 05:23:43 PM
Yesterday I tried to start my car with the key to my liquor cabinet.

I'm not really sure WHAT that says about me.

I've tried to open the front door with my car key and start the car with my front door key.  I'm sure we've all done that, but as a nondrinker I can honestly say I've never tried to start my car with a key to a liquor cabinet.  The most interesting thing on my key ring is the key to a place where I used to live, but I've had too many dreams about that particular key getting me out of trouble [no idea why I have dreams like that] to get rid of it. I know the people who bought it changed the locks, so it's really a key to nothing.   
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: kherbert05 on September 30, 2012, 06:45:02 PM
Many years ago, before 9/11, LDH, the DDs and I were taking a trip via airplane.

During the rush of final packing and getting to the airport on time I kept asking LDH "You have the tickets, right?" To the point where it irritated him, so I finally kept my mouth shut.

One of the last things I did was switch out purses.

We get to the check-in point to check our luggage get seat assignments and boarding passes.

They asked for ID. I look in my purse, no drivers license. All I had was a marriage certificate (don't ask ::) ) a couple of credit cards and a library card.

I'm not even going to try to describe the look on LDH's face as he quietly tapped on the tickets that I nagged him about.

Fortunately, like I said it was before 9/11 . . . the counter guy called over his manager who looked at the ID I had. Manager looked at the marriage certificate, then at my husband and asked him "Will you vouch for her as your wife?" LDH's response was a painful "Do I have to?"

They let me on the plane with a warning that I would need a photo ID for my return trip. They suggested that I go to a SAMs club at my destination, sign up for a membership in order to get a photo ID.


Yeah. I felt pretty stupid that day.



P.S. I was able to call the friend that was cat-sitting for us, told him where my drivers license was (with banking stuff I did the day before) and he fed-exed it to me for my return trip.


I was let into Canada and back into the US with my baptismal certificate once, in HS. I was traveling with my parents and only needed my birth certificates. The birth certificate was found on the bottom of the drawer when we got back. It must have fallen out of the envelope.


When I was a senior Mom, Dad, and Sis went on a cruise (I was in Scotland and England with my HS drill team). Mom had swapped out her purse and left her green card in Houston. They had to get my cousin to go to our house and overnight the green card to them. The cruise company arranged a flight to meet the ship at its first stop.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jpcher on October 06, 2012, 01:38:41 PM
Not sure if this should go here, in the Brain-Hurty thread or the Stupid Questions thread . . .

I'm putting this here because I think I've been really stupid. And my brain is hurting because of it.

I recently got a DVR box instead of a standard cable box. I figured out how to program shows that I wanted to record. It worked for a while and I was loving it!

Then it stopped working.

I reprogrammed my shows, confident that I did everything right. Next day? No recordings.

This morning I went to hunt down the instruction manual. Even before I found the manual, it dawned on me.

The power for the DVR box has to be on in order for it to record anything, right? (eta: That is a stupid question, right?)



I've been hitting the "All Off" button instead of just turning off the TV. ::)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Harriet Jones on October 06, 2012, 08:54:29 PM
Yes, the DVR needs to be on.  However, does "all off" mean that there's no electricity going to it?  I have a TiVo rather than a cable DVR, but it has an indicator light that shows that the device is on.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Outdoor Girl on October 07, 2012, 03:53:29 PM
I hit the power button on my DVR to turn it off and it still records just fine.  Now, there is still electricity going to the box.  If I turned off the power bar it is plugged into, it wouldn't record.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jpcher on October 07, 2012, 04:32:19 PM
When I hit the "All Off" button, there is no indicator light showing that the DVR still has power going to it.


Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Outdoor Girl on October 07, 2012, 04:34:24 PM
Mine still shows the clock and I think one other little light, which indicates there are recordings pending.

So maybe your 'all off' function is the issue.  Try leaving it on - it'll probably work.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jedikaiti on October 07, 2012, 10:41:49 PM
I've decided I'm not allowed to make recipe substitutions anymore. My mom sent me a Duncan Hines Red Velvet cupcake mix so I decided to make it yesterday. It called for a 1/2 stick of butter to make the frosting and I don't normally keep butter at home. When I went grocery shopping they only had entire pounds for $3-4. I'm broke and refuse to have 3/4 of a pound of something I'm unlikely to use to I decided to substitute coconut oil. This was actually going fine and making a nice, creamy frosting until I added the water the recipe called for. Big mistake. The frosting starting to curdle into little pieces that resembled cottage cheese and sprayed everywhere with the electric mixer. I managed to squeeze them together in the bag, but it would not stick to the cupcakes no matter what I did and dried out in little white Cheeto-shaped chunks.

They're still delicious, but I have to add frosting chunks to each bite of my cupcakes. So much for bringing them to work so I don't eat them all!

You know you can freeze butter, right? :-)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Rohanna on October 08, 2012, 02:25:55 AM
It's called a "paradoxical reaction"- my 4 year old had one to Versed. It was supposed to sedate him pre-surgery, but instead he ended up screaming, crying, kicking and broke a nurses rib on the way to the OR.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: mechtilde on October 08, 2012, 02:39:33 AM
It's called a "paradoxical reaction"- my 4 year old had one to Versed. It was supposed to sedate him pre-surgery, but instead he ended up screaming, crying, kicking and broke a nurses rib on the way to the OR.

Wow- and I thought I was bad when they tried to sedate me...

Although I think in my case they were able to get out of the way and I was too out of it to get up.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jpcher on October 08, 2012, 04:30:53 PM
re: DVR -- when I hit the all-off button there are no lights remaining on the DVR.

I haven't tried recording anything yet . . . I'll keep you posted.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: HorseFreak on October 08, 2012, 04:44:42 PM
I've decided I'm not allowed to make recipe substitutions anymore. My mom sent me a Duncan Hines Red Velvet cupcake mix so I decided to make it yesterday. It called for a 1/2 stick of butter to make the frosting and I don't normally keep butter at home. When I went grocery shopping they only had entire pounds for $3-4. I'm broke and refuse to have 3/4 of a pound of something I'm unlikely to use to I decided to substitute coconut oil. This was actually going fine and making a nice, creamy frosting until I added the water the recipe called for. Big mistake. The frosting starting to curdle into little pieces that resembled cottage cheese and sprayed everywhere with the electric mixer. I managed to squeeze them together in the bag, but it would not stick to the cupcakes no matter what I did and dried out in little white Cheeto-shaped chunks.

They're still delicious, but I have to add frosting chunks to each bite of my cupcakes. So much for bringing them to work so I don't eat them all!

You know you can freeze butter, right? :-)

Yes, but I never use it. 3/4 lb of frozen butter will probably just be tossed or given away when I move next and I don't have the extra cash to have something I don't need hanging around.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: NyaChan on October 08, 2012, 07:38:41 PM
I get it - my grocery store was giving away a free 2-liter of their generic soda with pizza.  The cashier simply could not understand why I didn't want it - I was going out of town, no one I know drinks the generic brand and I didn't want it just laying around my apartment.  She kept arguing with me and rolling her eyes like I was nuts :)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: CrochetFanatic on October 08, 2012, 09:24:03 PM
Today I seriously burned the roof of my mouth on molten cheese...right after warning someone else that it was hot.  Later, having forgotten about it, I got myself some hot coffee and re-burned my mouth.  It wouldn't have actually hurt at all, but the roof of my mouth was still tender from the pizza.  So yeah, that was kind of stupid.  That's like telling someone "Don't slip", then promptly landing on your behind.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Nora on October 09, 2012, 06:08:57 AM
So yeah, that was kind of stupid.  That's like telling someone "Don't slip", then promptly landing on your behind.

I am the Queen of this. Always tripping, dropping things, burning myself, all the while going "sweetheart, be careful" to someone nearby.  ::)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: KimberlyM on October 09, 2012, 10:35:19 AM
I stayed home with a migraine yesterday.  I got out of bed mid afternoon to get some water and take some more pain meds.  Lights were on, curtains open, tv on etc (husband and toddler were home).  Rather than being smart and asking hubby to bring them to me I figure I can squint through the light and just get what I need and get back to my blessedly dark and quiet room.  All went as planned, until I walked into the wall and gave myself a giant goose-egg on my forehead.  Not surprisingly, didn't help much with my headache.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: mbbored on October 09, 2012, 11:23:55 AM
That's like telling someone "Don't slip", then promptly landing on your behind.

ROFL!  Oh, I've done that!!  When I was working at a fast-food place, long, long ago, the person before me had not emptied out the grease trap to the grill.  So I emptied it, then mopped up the spilled grease so no one would slip on the greasy floor.
Then I promptly slipped on the wet floor.   And landed ON THE GRILL.

The burned arm took 2 years to heal properly.

I used to lead a team at Habitat for Humanity. One day I was giving my usual safety lecture, winding up as usual with "And don't get hurt because the nearest ER is 30 minutes away!", then promptly slipped and fell into a ditch filled with broken cement blocks. I gave myself a concussion and ripped a whole in my leg down to the muscle. Then I got to give an impromptu first aid course and directions to said nearest ER.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: 2doglady on October 09, 2012, 03:07:19 PM
This is from 30+ years ago.  I was sitting on the toilet at work and saw a stray thread.  I started pulling it, thinking it would be a short thread or stop.  Ended up pulling quite a bit of thread.  Finally I realized I had just unraveled the thread that was holding the elastic onto my panties.  I ended up having to take them off and throw them away since as soon as I stood up, they fell down.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jpcher on October 13, 2012, 02:33:57 PM
re: DVR -- sure enough. Several nights ago, I turned off my TV and left the power to my DVR on. When I went to watch TV last night? There were quite a few of my requested shows that had been recorded. ::)


This is from 30+ years ago.  I was sitting on the toilet at work and saw a stray thread.  I started pulling it, thinking it would be a short thread or stop.  Ended up pulling quite a bit of thread.  Finally I realized I had just unraveled the thread that was holding the elastic onto my panties.  I ended up having to take them off and throw them away since as soon as I stood up, they fell down.


LOL! I did this once with a sweater I was wearing at work. I went to the bathroom and saw a stray thread. I strongly pulled it off and before I realized that it was actually still attached, I ended up with a gaping 4+ inch hole in the side seam of my sweater. From the armpit down, clearly showing off my bra.

I went back to the office, grabbed a stapler, went back to the bathroom and stapled my sweater seam back together.


Yeah. Do not trust those stray threads.

Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Sebastienne on October 13, 2012, 07:37:04 PM
My husband's absolute favorite story to tell about me. Short and sweet:

Indian restaurant. Food comes out on a large metal hot plate. Waiter says, "Don't touch; it's hot." Immediately, what do I do? Touch the hot plate. A night of pain later, and I had to admit the  waiter was onto something.

My counter-story: We're in Brussels, walking down the sidewalk, holding hands. All of a sudden, my hand is a lot lower than it had been. I look over, and... You know how there are sometimes trees planted on the edge of city sidewalks, with metal grates around them? Well, one tree had been removed, and the grate hadn't. So my brilliant, Ivy-League educated husband? Walked straight into a hole.

He wasn't hurt, so therefore it's hilarious.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: mmswm on October 13, 2012, 08:28:30 PM
My most embarrassing "uh-oh" moment was at an all day long "drop-in" type BBQ I hosted for the local fire house and the people in my neighborhood (when I still lived in Florida). I had a buffet set up and kept hamburgers and hot dogs on the grill all day long, and members of my local fire and police departments were invited to drop by when they could and grab a bite to eat.  They were also invited to bring their families along to eat, swim and play games in the yard.  It was a great party and everybody had a lot of fun.

My Uh-Oh moment came about halfway through the party.  The couple that lived across the street from me were friends, and also members of the police and fire departments.  The husband was off duty that day and he spent most of the day hanging out having a good time.  The kids were having a water gun fight, and I got the bright idea to shoot my neighbor with one of the water guns.  His response to this was to shove me in the pool.  This would have been fine, except my phone AND my camera were in my pockets. Now, I know my old neighbor.  I knew the second I shot the water gun that it was a bad idea, but it was too late to take it back.  Ooops.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: VorFemme on October 21, 2012, 06:26:59 PM
re: DVR -- sure enough. Several nights ago, I turned off my TV and left the power to my DVR on. When I went to watch TV last night? There were quite a few of my requested shows that had been recorded. ::)


This is from 30+ years ago.  I was sitting on the toilet at work and saw a stray thread.  I started pulling it, thinking it would be a short thread or stop.  Ended up pulling quite a bit of thread.  Finally I realized I had just unraveled the thread that was holding the elastic onto my panties.  I ended up having to take them off and throw them away since as soon as I stood up, they fell down.


LOL! I did this once with a sweater I was wearing at work. I went to the bathroom and saw a stray thread. I strongly pulled it off and before I realized that it was actually still attached, I ended up with a gaping 4+ inch hole in the side seam of my sweater. From the armpit down, clearly showing off my bra.

I went back to the office, grabbed a stapler, went back to the bathroom and stapled my sweater seam back together.


Yeah. Do not trust those stray threads.



Took the hem right out of my very full gathered skirt....at work as a substitute teacher.  Fortunately, I did have a sewing kit in my purse - and spent my one period without students in the bathroom, hemming the skirt (couldn't hem it while wearing it and nothing else to wear with me)!

++++

Five years earlier, I'd been in the military and a member of the base commander's team (Junior Officers' Club representative) so I went to four quarterly meetings.  Someone complained about the chain stitch and clear monofiliment thread used to hem the military uniforms at the base dry cleaners.  The base commander (a one star general - 0-6) pulled his ankle up on his knee & pulled at a loose clear thread.........to have the hem on his pants unravel....  He knew immediately why the complaint had been filed.....
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Rohanna on October 21, 2012, 08:31:29 PM
I get it - my grocery store was giving away a free 2-liter of their generic soda with pizza.  The cashier simply could not understand why I didn't want it - I was going out of town, no one I know drinks the generic brand and I didn't want it just laying around my apartment.  She kept arguing with me and rolling her eyes like I was nuts :)

If your grocery store has a food bank bin like mine, you can always put unwanted free or 2 for 1 items in it. I've done that with cookies when I only want to eat the contents of one packet that week, not two  ::) While I wouldn't buy "junk" food for a food bank, if it's free then I figure someone might enjoy the treat.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jpcher on October 22, 2012, 05:11:55 PM
I get it - my grocery store was giving away a free 2-liter of their generic soda with pizza.  The cashier simply could not understand why I didn't want it - I was going out of town, no one I know drinks the generic brand and I didn't want it just laying around my apartment.  She kept arguing with me and rolling her eyes like I was nuts :)

If your grocery store has a food bank bin like mine, you can always put unwanted free or 2 for 1 items in it. I've done that with cookies when I only want to eat the contents of one packet that week, not two  ::) While I wouldn't buy "junk" food for a food bank, if it's free then I figure someone might enjoy the treat.

Ohhh . . . that's a great idea! My store has these bins mostly around the holidays and there's a lot of things that I don't get the 2-for-1 of. I'll make sure to look for a bin every time I shop, just in case.

Thanks! ;D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: mbbored on November 28, 2012, 10:07:44 PM
This evening I got a snack of cheese out of the refrigerator without turning on the lights. Later, I went back in to grab a glass of wine and turned on the lights to see the glass. With the light on, I noticed the tubberware of cheese was filled with mold. Ugh.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jpcher on November 30, 2012, 05:14:19 PM
Hopefully the piece you ate was the piece without any mold.


or


Did it taste like blue cheese? :-\


Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: mbbored on November 30, 2012, 08:59:50 PM
Hopefully the piece you ate was the piece without any mold.


or


Did it taste like blue cheese? :-\

Vaguely blue cheese-y. Fortunately 48 hours later, I still haven't felt any ill effects, so I think I'm in the clear.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: mmswm on November 30, 2012, 09:10:01 PM
When baking cookies, it is wise to use a pot holder to move the pan of cookies that you just took out and set down only long enough to move another pan that was in the way of where you wanted to put the first pan to begin with.  When you grab a pan that has only been out of the oven for 30 seconds with your bare hands, it HURTS. 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: mbbored on November 30, 2012, 10:32:56 PM
When baking cookies, it is wise to use a pot holder to move the pan of cookies that you just took out and set down only long enough to move another pan that was in the way of where you wanted to put the first pan to begin with.  When you grab a pan that has only been out of the oven for 30 seconds with your bare hands, it HURTS.

Thank you for sharing your wisdom as we approach the holiday baking season.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: TylerBelle on December 01, 2012, 12:05:52 AM
The other day I was getting some coke out of the refrigerator and while retrieving and opening the bottle, I absently sat my glass into one of the door shelves to hold it. I poured my drink then found I couldn't take it out of the door because it'd have to tilt somewhat and now, unlike before when it was empty, it was filled nearly to the brim. So the only thing I could immediately think to do was to stand there and take as many sips as possible until the liquid was low enough for the glass to tilt and could be removed without spilling. ???
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: siamesecat2965 on December 01, 2012, 07:32:19 AM
When baking cookies, it is wise to use a pot holder to move the pan of cookies that you just took out and set down only long enough to move another pan that was in the way of where you wanted to put the first pan to begin with.  When you grab a pan that has only been out of the oven for 30 seconds with your bare hands, it HURTS.

Ah yes. something my brain hasn't quite comprehended.  Although I did manage to avoid doing this at thanksgiving, when i was cooking and putting stuff in, taking it out, etc. But I had to stop and think each time!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: BabylonSister on December 10, 2012, 04:08:57 PM
This morning I took a walk to the thrift store to bring some donations in a bag. Once I was back at my front door, I realized I no longer had my house keys.  I went back to the store and found out that - pretty much as I suspected - I had absent-mindedly tossed my keys in the donation bag. Good thing the volunteers at the store know me well and allowed me to rummage in the bag.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: CrochetFanatic on December 10, 2012, 07:18:56 PM
I once locked my car keys in the trunk after I tossed them in there without thinking as I was getting something out of there.  I had an "Oh crap" moment as I realized just as the trunk slammed shut what I had done.  I had to call someone for the spare set.  :-[
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: tiff019 on December 10, 2012, 07:35:32 PM
I once locked my car keys in the trunk after I tossed them in there without thinking as I was getting something out of there.  I had an "Oh crap" moment as I realized just as the trunk slammed shut what I had done.  I had to call someone for the spare set.  :-[

I did the exact same thing once in college!! Had to get a friend to give me a pick me up, take me back to campus (where I had a spare) and back to the Target parking lot!! Oops!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Julian on December 10, 2012, 09:03:52 PM
This morning I took a walk to the thrift store to bring some donations in a bag. Once I was back at my front door, I realized I no longer had my house keys.  I went back to the store and found out that - pretty much as I suspected - I had absent-mindedly tossed my keys in the donation bag. Good thing the volunteers at the store know me well and allowed me to rummage in the bag.

A couple of months ago Housemate did this, only with several pairs of jeans she intended to take in to the drycleaner's to be taken up.  She also had a bag of donation clothes.  She got to the drycleaner with nothing to give them - about face to the thrift shop, where they had already priced them and hung them on the racks!  Fortunately they were very understanding, and returned them all.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Gwywnnydd on December 10, 2012, 10:11:26 PM
I once locked my car keys in the trunk after I tossed them in there without thinking as I was getting something out of there.  I had an "Oh crap" moment as I realized just as the trunk slammed shut what I had done.  I had to call someone for the spare set.  :-[

My best friend locked her baby in the car once. He had been given her keys to gnaw on (her key fob was a perfect teething toy), and she put his car seat in the car, slammed the door, and then realized she'd just locked herself out.
The doctor who she had just had an appointment with loaned her his car, and his office staff keptthe baby company, while she screamed home for the spare key :D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jpcher on December 19, 2012, 05:16:17 PM
We have a sliding glass patio door that was getting squeaky and hard to push.

No problem. Just clean off the track and put a little bit of oil down, right?

So I went to the garage and got my handy-dandy can of WD40, sprayed it on the track . . .

THEN! I stood there with my handy-dandy little hand-held whisk broom and thought . . . If I use the whisk broom now, it will be covered in oil and I won't be able to use for anything else.

 . . . I just did this backwards, didn't I. ::)


Sigh.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: alkira6 on December 19, 2012, 07:24:26 PM
We have a sliding glass patio door that was getting squeaky and hard to push.

No problem. Just clean off the track and put a little bit of oil down, right?

So I went to the garage and got my handy-dandy can of WD40, sprayed it on the track . . .

THEN! I stood there with my handy-dandy little hand-held whisk broom and thought . . . If I use the whisk broom now, it will be covered in oil and I won't be able to use for anything else.

 . . . I just did this backwards, didn't I. ::)


Sigh.

Hahahahahaha   :P

...and that's why I buy stuff at dollar tree.  I do stuff like that all. the. time.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: CrochetFanatic on January 30, 2013, 09:26:44 AM
Having some things on your mind + fixing microwave popcorn = absentmindedly hitting the "Quick Min." button instead of the "Popcorn" button and ending up with about a half cup of popcorn and a bunch of unpopped kernels. Oops. ;D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: CrochetFanatic on January 30, 2013, 01:35:27 PM
That's what I ended up doing, but I still felt pretty silly.  And I just thought of another one.  Two days in a row, I turned on the coffee pot only to come back to find it cold and empty.  I had forgotten to plug it in.  My brother got a good laugh out of that one.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: mmswm on January 31, 2013, 07:50:44 AM
That's what I ended up doing, but I still felt pretty silly.  And I just thought of another one.  Two days in a row, I turned on the coffee pot only to come back to find it cold and empty.  I had forgotten to plug it in.  My brother got a good laugh out of that one.

This is much better than my father's favorite trick.  The carafe for their coffee maker is solid stainless steel.  You can't see what's inside. It's also a 3 minute "quick brew" maker.  Once or twice a month, he goes to make the coffee, forgets to check if there's any old coffee in the pot and starts it.  The result is a huge mess of coffee all over the counter and floor.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Diane AKA Traska on March 08, 2013, 03:27:38 PM
The Six Month Double Cheeseburger

So today, I'm trying to figure out lunch, and I see (as I often do) a double cheeseburger we bought at least half a year ago.  It's been int he fridge (not the freezer) that entire time.  We keep passing it, and after a certain time it basically became One With The Fridge.  That is, it was almost decorative.  I decided enough was enough.  I was going to open it, and decide do I throw it away, or eat it?

I open it, and inspect for signs of decay.  Bun is soft and free of growth.  Cheese is pliable.  Meat smells normal.  So I plunk it into the microwave, figuring that if it smells off, I can chuck it.  It smelled good.  I don't mean not bad, I mean tasty.  So...

I ate it.

Give it a few hours, and I'll update with just how stupid this idea was, but I've eaten more questionable things in the past.  (As a teen, shimmery ham leaps to mind).
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: lilfox on March 08, 2013, 03:39:19 PM
Chopped an onion that was starting to get old with a knife that was much duller than I thought.  I went a little too quickly and the knife skidded across the surface and landed on my finger.  It only caused a little nick, and my first thought was "wow I'm glad it wasn't sharper!"

My second thought was "a sharper knife wouldn't have slipped in the first place.".  ::)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Outdoor Girl on March 08, 2013, 03:51:07 PM
The Six Month Double Cheeseburger

So today, I'm trying to figure out lunch, and I see (as I often do) a double cheeseburger we bought at least half a year ago.  It's been int he fridge (not the freezer) that entire time.  We keep passing it, and after a certain time it basically became One With The Fridge.  That is, it was almost decorative.  I decided enough was enough.  I was going to open it, and decide do I throw it away, or eat it?

I open it, and inspect for signs of decay.  Bun is soft and free of growth.  Cheese is pliable.  Meat smells normal.  So I plunk it into the microwave, figuring that if it smells off, I can chuck it.  It smelled good.  I don't mean not bad, I mean tasty.  So...

I ate it.

Give it a few hours, and I'll update with just how stupid this idea was, but I've eaten more questionable things in the past.  (As a teen, shimmery ham leaps to mind).

I think this should be cross posted in both the 'What Brave Things Have You Done' and the 'Gross out' threads.   :P
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Shalamar on March 08, 2013, 03:56:07 PM
I should tell my buddy about that burger.   He and I once went out for dinner, and a couple of days later I brought the leftovers from my meal for lunch.  They'd been in my fridge for the entire time.  He asked what I was having for lunch, and when I told him, he sputtered "Are you CRAZY?  You'll get food poisoning!"  "What?  Those leftovers are only two days old!"  "EXACTLY!  You should throw them out!"  "Uh, no, I'm not going to do that."

I ate 'em, and I was fine. 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: random numbers on March 08, 2013, 04:15:02 PM
The Six Month Double Cheeseburger

So today, I'm trying to figure out lunch, and I see (as I often do) a double cheeseburger we bought at least half a year ago.  It's been int he fridge (not the freezer) that entire time.  We keep passing it, and after a certain time it basically became One With The Fridge.  That is, it was almost decorative.  I decided enough was enough.  I was going to open it, and decide do I throw it away, or eat it?

I open it, and inspect for signs of decay.  Bun is soft and free of growth.  Cheese is pliable.  Meat smells normal.  So I plunk it into the microwave, figuring that if it smells off, I can chuck it.  It smelled good.  I don't mean not bad, I mean tasty.  So...

I ate it.

Give it a few hours, and I'll update with just how stupid this idea was, but I've eaten more questionable things in the past.  (As a teen, shimmery ham leaps to mind).

I give you a twelve year hamburger:

http://aht.seriouseats.com/archives/2008/09/12-year-old-mcdonalds-hamburger-still-looking-good.html
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: ica171 on March 08, 2013, 06:27:53 PM
Cooked hamburger patties are relatively low moisture, so that's why the McDonald's cheeseburger and Diane's didn't get moldy. I don't know that I'd eat a six month old cheeseburger even if I didn't see mold, though (but a cheeseburger wouldn't last six days in my house).
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Diane AKA Traska on March 08, 2013, 07:01:59 PM
UPDATE:

I still function!

More importantly, other than some minor gas, the burger does not seem to have negatively impacted me.  Yay for science!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: mbbored on March 10, 2013, 09:30:50 PM
Don't attempt to walk down stairs in stilettos while drinking from a glass bottle.

Fortunately I managed to fling the Coke bottle across my living room and throw my other hand out so I didn't slam my head into the door frame opposite my stairs. Now I have a sprained thumb, a series of bruises up one side of my body, a scraped shin (how I did that I don't know) and freshly mopped floors.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Amara on March 10, 2013, 09:36:39 PM
Don't attempt to walk down stairs in stilettos while drinking from a glass bottle.

Fortunately I managed to fling the Coke bottle across my living room and throw my other hand out so I didn't slam my head into the door frame opposite my stairs. Now I have a sprained thumb, a series of bruises up one side of my body, a scraped shin (how I did that I don't know) and freshly mopped floors.

Following up on that, I can add: Don't move a wine rack without emptying it first. If you do, you take a chance that it will snag on something, spill some of the bottles out whereupon one will break and spray (good) red wine all over the floor, counters, shoes, walls, and rugs. When you get down to clean it up, you will use at least one sheet, one bath towel, a full roll of paper towels, a cupful of vinegar, and even then you will have a cloud of red wine hanging about your head for two full days afterward, making you sick. Oh, and be sure to wash that bathrobe you were wearing. Alone. In cold water. First. Then throw out the bath towel and sheet. The trash collectors might have opinions about your lifestyle when they come on Monday mornings but never mind that.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: CrochetFanatic on March 10, 2013, 09:59:35 PM
Tonight I burned the rice because I forgot to turn the heat down to let it simmer.  I've never done that before (I swear!), and up until then I was feeling pretty pleased with how efficiently I was managing my time and three hot pots.  What I got was a nasty mess in one pan, a burned thumb, and a boiling temper.

The rest of the meal was good, though.  I didn't want rice anyway.  :P
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Gyburc on March 11, 2013, 06:51:43 AM
That's like telling someone "Don't slip", then promptly landing on your behind.

ROFL!  Oh, I've done that!!  When I was working at a fast-food place, long, long ago, the person before me had not emptied out the grease trap to the grill.  So I emptied it, then mopped up the spilled grease so no one would slip on the greasy floor.
Then I promptly slipped on the wet floor.   And landed ON THE GRILL.

The burned arm took 2 years to heal properly.

I used to lead a team at Habitat for Humanity. One day I was giving my usual safety lecture, winding up as usual with "And don't get hurt because the nearest ER is 30 minutes away!", then promptly slipped and fell into a ditch filled with broken cement blocks. I gave myself a concussion and ripped a whole in my leg down to the muscle. Then I got to give an impromptu first aid course and directions to said nearest ER.

I know of someone who teaches historical swordsmanship, and was giving a class, using live steel (a sharp replica sword). I believe he had just covered the safety aspects before he shifted from one stance into another, and in the process stabbed the sharp sword quite deeply into his own thigh.

I'm afraid to say the gentleman in question wasn't terribly popular, and as a result this has now become legend.  >:D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: siamesecat2965 on March 11, 2013, 09:45:15 AM
Mine is minor, but still very annoying. I cleaned on Sat, then went to work from 5-9. After I got home, all i had to do was put clean sheets on my bed. So its about midnight, and i set my clock ahead, making it almost 1am. I change my sheets, make the bed nicely, and go to put the "dirty" ones in the hamper. ONly to find the fitted sheet is missing. I had neglected to remove it and made the bed OVER it. I thought about it, then just pulled it all apart and started over. Note to self: change sheets when you're more awake.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Margo on March 11, 2013, 04:35:05 PM
I had a car-related one.

One day, my car's gearbox broke, and I couldn't get reverse gear. I was very proud of myself for managing to get out of the parking space I was in despite this, then  phoned Dave-at-the-garage who said to bring it straight down and he'd check it out for me. So, I drove back home, intending to drive pas t the house, and on down to the garage.  And then, on autopilot, turned in through the gateway at home and parked in my usual spot between the wall and my parents car.

At which point I remembered the part about having no reverse gear. And that the gateway is pretty narrow, so not one which the tow-truck fits through easily.



Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: mbbored on March 11, 2013, 11:06:40 PM
Don't attempt to walk down stairs in stilettos while drinking from a glass bottle.

Fortunately I managed to fling the Coke bottle across my living room and throw my other hand out so I didn't slam my head into the door frame opposite my stairs. Now I have a sprained thumb, a series of bruises up one side of my body, a scraped shin (how I did that I don't know) and freshly mopped floors.

A brief follow-up: don't start your work day filled with meetings and while wearing a white shirt by picking up a cup of very hot tea with your hand that has a sprained thumb.

I now have a new keyboard and am on the hunt for a new white tea.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: scotcat60 on March 12, 2013, 07:49:11 AM
I once mixed up mouthwash and pine scented disinfectant, they were both green. However, I was cleaning a comb which had fallen on the floor, so I did not rinse my mouth with disinfectant. I just wondered why the comb smelled of mint and not pine.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Rohanna on March 12, 2013, 09:51:28 AM
I once brushed my teeth with conditioner (the little tubes that come with hair dye? Yeh... at 530am my brain said "that tube MUST be toothpaste").... bleurgh :(
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Shalamar on March 12, 2013, 10:15:28 AM
I once grabbed a bottle of contact lens cleaner that looked a bit like my eye drops and squirted some in my eye.  "OW!  Geez!  That hurts!  What the heck?"  ... and then I did the same to the other eye.   ???
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: TylerBelle on March 12, 2013, 03:47:15 PM
One night I laid the tv remote beside my pillow and went on to sleep. Next day when needing the remote, I couldn't find it. I moved the pillows around, blankets, searched under and around the bed, every where in the room, and no remote. I even looked a bit around the house, wondering perhaps I picked it up without thinking. Nope, still no sign of it. It'd been missing for a few days when one night in bed, my hand came to rest on the pillow and there was something hard there at the end of it - the remote. Apparently, when I moved around the pillows earlier, the remote had gotten caught up into the pillowcase and slid all the way to the other end of it, and there it stayed while I searched and also slept next to it. ::)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: amandaelizabeth on March 12, 2013, 05:02:15 PM
Was having a bad day in a bad last week.  That morning, it wasn't until I went to put on clothes that I found I had used toothpaste not deodorant.  I had to have another shower which made my armpits fizz up in blue bubbles.  I think I will go back to toothpaste in a tube from now on.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Diane AKA Traska on March 13, 2013, 09:27:23 AM
Just as a word of warning to you folks out there:

When you're plugging in a lamp in a dark room, DO NOT touch the prongs to make it easier to guide the plug into the socket.   

I did this.  Twice.    I'm surprised I don't have curly hair.

Related: If you have an extension cord with a plastic housing at the end for the outlets, and that plastic breaks, make SURE it's unplugged before you pick it up to examine it.  M could hear my scream from downstairs, outside, in the car.  Luckily, it was a total reflex scream (current'll do that) and I dropped it QUICK.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: AfleetAlex on March 13, 2013, 10:58:38 AM
Was having a bad day in a bad last week.  That morning, it wasn't until I went to put on clothes that I found I had used toothpaste not deodorant.  I had to have another shower which made my armpits fizz up in blue bubbles.  I think I will go back to toothpaste in a tube from now on.

I'm so sorry, I can't help laughing at the visual. But I'm sorry you were having a bad week.  :-[
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: lilfox on March 13, 2013, 12:36:58 PM
Was having a bad day in a bad last week.  That morning, it wasn't until I went to put on clothes that I found I had used toothpaste not deodorant.  I had to have another shower which made my armpits fizz up in blue bubbles.  I think I will go back to toothpaste in a tube from now on.

I'm so sorry, I can't help laughing at the visual. But I'm sorry you were having a bad week.  :-[

The visual is really funny but can I ask, what form was your toothpaste in??  I'm only familiar with tube or powdered form toothpaste, and only familiar with spray, roll-on, or solid deodorants.

And to tell one on myself - I have two contact lens solution bottles.  One is effectively acid and has a bright red DANGER top on it, and the other is plain ol' saline in an all-white bottle.  Grabbing the first bottle to rinse a contact before putting it in my eye was a mistake I hope only happens once.   :'(
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: amandaelizabeth on March 13, 2013, 06:08:34 PM
I live in a land down-under that is not Australia.  With a small very diverse population we are often used as guinea pigs by multinational companies for consumer items that they think might do well.  So this toothpaste is in a metal container with a sort of spray nozzle on the top.  It only foams up if it hits water. 

Come to think of it I haven't seen any recently in the supermarket so maybe it was not the raging success they had hoped. Or there was an outbreak of blue foaming arm pits through out the country
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Dazi on March 13, 2013, 07:18:15 PM
I live in a land down-under that is not Australia.  With a small very diverse population we are often used as guinea pigs by multinational companies for consumer items that they think might do well.  So this toothpaste is in a metal container with a sort of spray nozzle on the top.  It only foams up if it hits water. 

Come to think of it I haven't seen any recently in the supermarket so maybe it was not the raging success they had hoped. Or there was an outbreak of blue foaming arm pits through out the country
Sounds like Synsdyne Proenamel toothpaste.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: amandaelizabeth on March 13, 2013, 08:35:01 PM
think Scotland
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Zenith on March 13, 2013, 09:03:21 PM
I once brushed my teeth with conditioner (the little tubes that come with hair dye? Yeh... at 530am my brain said "that tube MUST be toothpaste").... bleurgh :(

I did that with the bepanthanen tube last week. Hurk
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: VorFemme on March 24, 2013, 07:32:15 PM
Bid on a laptop with better specs than the one I have on eBay - won it.  This isn't too bad if I set a low maximum, but if I get caught up in a bidding war......

My bank account looses even if I win.

Although the way Windows 8 computers are taking over the stores - having a spare Windows 7 laptop around isn't the worst thing to spend less than $75 on.  Because I found out that the software to run my embroidery machine is NOT being updated to Windows 8 and VorGuy is not wild about spending $1000 plus on a new embroidery machine - whether it is going to be Windows 8 compatible or not.

I do not call him Scrooge McDuck because nobody goes up against Disney on copyright issues and wins, that I've heard of.  But you get the idea?

Love the guy - just don't love shopping with him - unless I've found a "bargain".

He is happy with my latest bargain - I found him a NEW leather wallet last week - less than $4 USA at the local Goodwill.......usual price would have been at least 5 or 6 times that, if not higher.  And his old one is showing a bit of wear......
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: andi on March 26, 2013, 09:04:50 PM
Cornbread mix WILL go bad if kept long enough past the expiration date  - just over two years will do it.  You can tell because there will be little odd colors "dots" in it that may or may not move. If you see there dos, you should not taste to see is everything is ok - it's not. You will get sick.

The same with Durkees French fried onions. Rancid oil will taste nasty and you will wnd up at the grocery store 5 minutes before it closes on thanksgiving afternoon while apologizing to your MIL
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jpcher on March 30, 2013, 01:41:19 PM
I just boiled 1 & 1/2 doz. eggs for easter egg coloring.

After they were done boiling, I brought them to the sink, ran cold water on them and gave the pot a couple of flips to toss the eggs so that the shells crack, making them easier to peel. Just like I always do when making deviled eggs.



Oh. Yeah.

I'm making easter eggs.

Not deviled eggs.

You don't peel easter eggs before coloring. Duh.



I guess I'm making deviled eggs after all. :P

Fortunately I had another dozen eggs, but still ::)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Dazi on March 30, 2013, 01:52:40 PM
Jpcher, I've done that not once, not twice, but just about everytime I've ever made Easter eggs.

For fun deviled eggs, you can go ahead and cut the eggs in half and pop out the yolks.  Rinse any extra yolk off and dye them along with the rest.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: mmswm on March 30, 2013, 02:08:44 PM
You can also leave them cracked and dye them anyway.  It makes a neat spider pattern on the eggs once you do peel them.  While I've made the same mistake dozens of times, I actually do it on purpose on Halloween.  I crack them so there's a good pattern all around, then soak them in red food coloring.  When I make deviled eggs out of them, I decorate them to look like eyeballs, and the red dye takes on a great blood shot eye pattern.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: jpcher on March 30, 2013, 03:40:19 PM
Thank you both, Dazi and mmswm!

Now that you mentioned it, I remember a thread in "entertainment and hospitality" where someone posted easter deviled eggs and they did just what you mentioned, Dazi!

I'll have to do that! ;D


Red food coloring and deviled egg eyes? How cool is that?



What a way to save a disastrous mistake!  ;D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Faerydust on March 30, 2013, 04:41:02 PM
TMI warning!

This was a few years ago, but I always wondered if anyone else has ever done this. I was having a very long day and it was also that time of the month. I went to the bathroom to change my tampon and as I removed it, I felt like something was still there. Apparently, sometime earlier in the day, I had put a new one in without taking the old one out. :o
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Amara on March 30, 2013, 07:43:21 PM
TMI! TMI!

I can top that one, Faerydust. Not by me, thank goodness, but I had a co-worker about three years ago who was complaining of pain in that area. Finally, she went to the doctor where it was discovered that she had a tampon in she had forgotten about. (That's why she had trouble getting a new one in.) The old one had been there for .... four months!

I nearly fainted out of ickiness when she told me that. How does anyone not know that??? (And please, if you know the answer don't tell me. I had forgotten about this until Faerydust posted her story.)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Nikko-chan on March 30, 2013, 07:46:06 PM
I am really really glad I was done eating, you two!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: CrochetFanatic on March 31, 2013, 06:54:38 AM
 :o It's a wonder she didn't get really sick!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Luci on March 31, 2013, 08:18:54 AM
Pelvic inflammatory disease.                            http://www.womensweb.ca/health/repro/std/pid.php

There were many, many warnings about this several years ago. It was one of those news stories that hit every newscast for about three days then is forgotten. After that, I noticed warnings on the product instructions to be sure to remove the final tampon.

I had no idea it could have any cause other than forgotten tampons or might be considered an STD until I read this article and a few others that I ran into looking for this one.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: greencat on March 31, 2013, 09:24:03 AM
I had a roommate tell me a similar story about a, um, partially lost personal hygiene article, but I'm pretty sure that one belongs in the gross-out thread.


Don't forget to tighten the bolts on the new seat you just installed on your bike.  It will go from being oriented correctly for sitting (horizontally) through several stages of diagonal and finally end up nearly vertical, while you attempt to ride it to work. 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Carotte on March 31, 2013, 10:01:25 AM
I won't tell on me, even if I've done some pretty stupid things, but a few things I like to hold above my SO's head, otherwise he start thinking he's never done anything stupid (and gets a bit arrogant when I do stupid things).

Don't start a drip coffee machine without checking the pot is actually under, and leave the kitchen. For his defense he doesn't use a drip machine and he hadn't had his coffee yet...
Don't play with the concert leaflet and set it up on the table, without noticing there's a tealight candle under.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: violinp on March 31, 2013, 02:22:44 PM
To myself:

When you go to church, silence your phone, please. That alarm for you to be at church going off in the middle of the reading (special service and my phone was set for service at the normal time) will be really, really embarrassing and make you want to sink into the choir loft.  :-[
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Amara on March 31, 2013, 02:54:32 PM
Quote
It's a wonder she didn't get really sick!

Actually, she did. That's how it was found, a visit to a specialist who was worried she might have tumor due to the pain. They were planning surgery.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: CrochetFanatic on March 31, 2013, 03:33:58 PM
Wow...
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Nikko-chan on April 01, 2013, 02:33:22 AM
I had a roommate tell me a similar story about a, um, partially lost personal hygiene article, but I'm pretty sure that one belongs in the gross-out thread.


Don't forget to tighten the bolts on the new seat you just installed on your bike.  It will go from being oriented correctly for sitting (horizontally) through several stages of diagonal and finally end up nearly vertical, while you attempt to ride it to work.

Are you gonna post the other story to the gross out thread?
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: VorFemme on April 14, 2013, 10:55:13 AM

Don't play with the concert leaflet and set it up on the table, without noticing there's a tealight candle under.


VorGuy was passing gas (something that he ate) and I lit a candle in a glass candle holder next to him to help with "freshening" the air (scented candle burning the methane was the idea).

He set the plastic lid to the chips container on top of the glass candle holder long enough for the corner to melt almost through......he was complaining about the odd BURNING plastic smell while eating his chips & sour cream dip (and passing more gas - Mexican food for lunch, if I recall what was the cause).  Then he had the unmitigated gall to complain that I hadn't told him that the candle was still burning......um, he was still passing gas......

I now know to keep burning candles further away from him.....
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Twik on April 14, 2013, 02:22:49 PM
He can't *see* the candle is burning? He has to be told?
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Elfmama on April 14, 2013, 10:08:46 PM
Do not try to cut through pins with the sewing scissors.  It will not do the pins any good, and it will seriously nick the scissors.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: mbbored on April 14, 2013, 11:09:21 PM
Don't decide that you can sneak into lab really quickly while wearing sandals, even though you know shoes are advised for a reason. Don't kick a door with metal edges when you're wearing said-sandals. Also, don't look at the pool of blood forming on the floor, look at the experiment you were supposed to set up and choose to set up the experiment first.

Fortunately my lab is equipped with really a good biohazard clean up kit in addition to the first aid kit.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Mad Goat Woman on April 15, 2013, 07:22:18 AM
Do not try to cut through pins with the sewing scissors.  It will not do the pins any good, and it will seriously nick the scissors.

Furthermore, don't iron fabric with pins still there. It'll melt the pinheads.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: StarDrifter on April 15, 2013, 08:57:40 AM
Do not try to cut through pins with the sewing scissors.  It will not do the pins any good, and it will seriously nick the scissors.

Furthermore, don't iron fabric with pins still there. It'll melt the pinheads.

Make sure *every* pin is removed before you try on a freshly sewn-and-ironed top - use a magnet if you have to because you will have missed a pin, it will be HOT from the iron and it will STICK into the skin unde your arm when you try the top on, burning and piercing you at the same time!

I have a lovely scar and the bloodstain never fully came out of that top.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: kymom3 on April 15, 2013, 09:55:37 AM
I made a pillowcase several years ago and left a pin in--OUCH!!

Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Luci on April 15, 2013, 10:03:01 AM
Do not try to cut through pins with the sewing scissors.  It will not do the pins any good, and it will seriously nick the scissors.

Furthermore, don't iron fabric with pins still there. It'll melt the pinheads.

Make sure *every* pin is removed before you try on a freshly sewn-and-ironed top - use a magnet if you have to because you will have missed a pin, it will be HOT from the iron and it will STICK into the skin unde your arm when you try the top on, burning and piercing you at the same time!

I have a lovely scar and the bloodstain never fully came out of that top.

This is why I use safety pins when making baby quilts! I was wadding one I had just finished to put into the washing machine, and...........well, just just say I'm glad it was me and not the baby, and the blood stain did come out (peroxide imediately!)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: siamesecat2965 on April 15, 2013, 10:55:33 AM
I nominate myself. Pay close attention to the date on the calendar as if you decide to go to the PO to mail a package on April 15 - it WILL be crowded. I guess since mine are done, and my refund received, it didn't even cross my mind. And this is after having an email conversation with a friend who works for an accountant, venting about today, and so on. I can only blame the fact that's its Monday and I'm tired.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Calistoga on April 15, 2013, 11:05:27 AM
So I have a pair of really good shoes for work. One day I noticed that my feet really hurt. I was working a double shift that day, and I figured a little time sitting down would do the trick. Came back from a 2 hour break and...man, my feet still hurt. At the end of the night I was so fed up with it I decided to just take my shoes off.

I looked down to untie my shoes.

And it was then that I realized I had put my shoes on the wrong feet that morning.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: alkira6 on April 15, 2013, 11:24:03 AM
Don't create the perfect wheat/egg/dairy free meal as per your new diet instructions and then pour yourself a big glass of milk to wash it down with. Yes, I did catch mydelf before drinking it and no, my husband has not stopped mocking me for it.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: ladyknight1 on April 15, 2013, 11:27:34 AM
Don't put the m&ms on the brownie batter before baking, as they will sink and disappear. We are having m&m surprise brownies at the work monthly birthday celebration today.  ::)
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: CrochetFanatic on April 15, 2013, 11:29:17 AM
When preparing to brush your teeth with a leftover tube of travel toothpaste, make sure that you're using toothpaste and not Preparation H...

That was a close one.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: alkira6 on April 15, 2013, 11:30:14 AM
When preparing to brush your teeth with a leftover tube of travel toothpaste, make sure that you're using toothpaste and not Preparation H...

That was a close one.

Well you wouldn't have to worry about swollen gums...
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Calistoga on April 15, 2013, 11:31:21 AM
The list of body parts not to touch after cutting up a jalapeno is rather extensive.

It's worth mentioning that this is definitely a situation in which one needs to wash their hands BEFORE going to the bathroom.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Eeep! on April 15, 2013, 11:40:45 AM

Don't play with the concert leaflet and set it up on the table, without noticing there's a tealight candle under.


VorGuy was passing gas (something that he ate) and I lit a candle in a glass candle holder next to him to help with "freshening" the air (scented candle burning the methane was the idea).

He set the plastic lid to the chips container on top of the glass candle holder long enough for the corner to melt almost through......he was complaining about the odd BURNING plastic smell while eating his chips & sour cream dip (and passing more gas - Mexican food for lunch, if I recall what was the cause).  Then he had the unmitigated gall to complain that I hadn't told him that the candle was still burning......um, he was still passing gas......

I now know to keep burning candles further away from him.....

I really thought this was going another direction - what with the whole lighting a match around a gas source.  Hee!  >:D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Eeep! on April 15, 2013, 11:42:19 AM
So I have a pair of really good shoes for work. One day I noticed that my feet really hurt. I was working a double shift that day, and I figured a little time sitting down would do the trick. Came back from a 2 hour break and...man, my feet still hurt. At the end of the night I was so fed up with it I decided to just take my shoes off.

I looked down to untie my shoes.

And it was then that I realized I had put my shoes on the wrong feet that morning.

Bwahahaha! Thanks so much for the Monday morning laugh!! ;D
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: EmmaJ. on April 15, 2013, 12:31:44 PM
The list of body parts not to touch after cutting up a jalapeno is rather extensive.

It's worth mentioning that this is definitely a situation in which one needs to wash their hands BEFORE going to the bathroom.

Been there, done that!  I prepared several dozen jalapenos to make poppers, THEN tried to take out my contacts.

Now I use disposable gloves, even if it's only one jalapeno.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Calistoga on April 15, 2013, 12:47:20 PM
So I have a pair of really good shoes for work. One day I noticed that my feet really hurt. I was working a double shift that day, and I figured a little time sitting down would do the trick. Came back from a 2 hour break and...man, my feet still hurt. At the end of the night I was so fed up with it I decided to just take my shoes off.

I looked down to untie my shoes.

And it was then that I realized I had put my shoes on the wrong feet that morning.

Bwahahaha! Thanks so much for the Monday morning laugh!! ;D


Hahaha...you're welcome! I had to laugh at myself for that one because I'm 23 and I've had that problem since I was a kid.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: mmswm on April 15, 2013, 02:32:27 PM
The list of body parts not to touch after cutting up a jalapeno is rather extensive.

It's worth mentioning that this is definitely a situation in which one needs to wash their hands BEFORE going to the bathroom.

Been there, done that!  I prepared several dozen jalapenos to make poppers, THEN tried to take out my contacts.

Now I use disposable gloves, even if it's only one jalapeno.

I learned this lesson after going to the bathroom after chopping a couple of jalapenos for bean soup.  It made for a rather, um, interesting next few hours.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: alkira6 on April 15, 2013, 04:53:50 PM
The list of body parts not to touch after cutting up a jalapeno is rather extensive.

It's worth mentioning that this is definitely a situation in which one needs to wash their hands BEFORE going to the bathroom.

Been there, done that!  I prepared several dozen jalapenos to make poppers, THEN tried to take out my contacts.

Now I use disposable gloves, even if it's only one jalapeno.

I learned this lesson after going to the bathroom after chopping a couple of jalapenos for bean soup.  It made for a rather, um, interesting next few hours.

What's interesting is trying to explain why you are whimpering and rubbing buttermilk on your lady parts with some amount of desperation.  That my friends is interesting.

*buttermilk neutralizes the burning oil in peppers, for those who went  :o
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Bottlecaps on April 15, 2013, 07:30:42 PM
The list of body parts not to touch after cutting up a jalapeno is rather extensive.

It's worth mentioning that this is definitely a situation in which one needs to wash their hands BEFORE going to the bathroom.

Been there, done that!  I prepared several dozen jalapenos to make poppers, THEN tried to take out my contacts.

Now I use disposable gloves, even if it's only one jalapeno.

I learned this lesson after going to the bathroom after chopping a couple of jalapenos for bean soup.  It made for a rather, um, interesting next few hours.

What's interesting is trying to explain why you are whimpering and rubbing buttermilk on your lady parts with some amount of desperation.  That my friends is interesting.

*buttermilk neutralizes the burning oil in peppers, for those who went  :o

I wish I would have known about the buttermilk trick before going to the bathroom after eating the extra hot wings at the local bar up home! (And of course I didn't wash my hands before, as I didn't think about it until it was too late and the burning had aready started!) Talk about hell down under. O.O
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: alkira6 on April 15, 2013, 07:53:06 PM
The list of body parts not to touch after cutting up a jalapeno is rather extensive.

It's worth mentioning that this is definitely a situation in which one needs to wash their hands BEFORE going to the bathroom.

Been there, done that!  I prepared several dozen jalapenos to make poppers, THEN tried to take out my contacts.

Now I use disposable gloves, even if it's only one jalapeno.

I learned this lesson after going to the bathroom after chopping a couple of jalapenos for bean soup.  It made for a rather, um, interesting next few hours.

What's interesting is trying to explain why you are whimpering and rubbing buttermilk on your lady parts with some amount of desperation.  That my friends is interesting.

*buttermilk neutralizes the burning oil in peppers, for those who went  :o

I wish I would have known about the buttermilk trick before going to the bathroom after eating the extra hot wings at the local bar up home! (And of course I didn't wash my hands before, as I didn't think about it until it was too late and the burning had aready started!) Talk about hell down under. O.O

One of the very few times in m y life where it only took one time for me to learn my lesson.  I buy gloves by the box to keep in the kitchen for everything - handling meat, cutting peppers, everything.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Mediancat on April 16, 2013, 07:09:33 AM
I didn't do that with jalapenos, but with jellyfish. When I was in college I worked a summer job for a guy doing some work on his property -- he lived off an inlet of the Chesapeake Bay -- and one day he came up to my coworker and me and asked us to stop what we were doing and get the jellyfish away from his dock.

When we were done, I instinctively reached my gloved hand up to wipe off my sweat, not realizing that a stray jellyfish tentacle remained on my glove.

Long red mark across my forehead for a few days. And it HURT.

Rob
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Nikko-chan on April 16, 2013, 08:55:13 AM
I um.... I did that with a jalepeno pepper yesterday... only it was near my eye and not my ladyparts... for those of you that don't know, buttermilk isn't the only thing that will work. Regular whole milk will work too.... yeah...
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Calistoga on April 16, 2013, 09:17:18 AM
Eyes. Lady parts. Mouth. Nose. I've done all of them. It got to the point where I told DH to just cut his own peppers, because I can not be trusted to remember.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: EllenS on April 16, 2013, 11:56:11 AM
When you're doing a formal event outdoors in the evening, take the time to aim the bug repellent at your legs - don't reach up under your skirt and spray willy-nilly.

There is no way to remain poised.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Shalamar on April 16, 2013, 12:45:00 PM
If you're eating a steak on a paper plate at a work barbeque, eat it on a table.  Not on your lap.  I cut right through the plate and put yucky greasy meat juice all over my white shorts.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: mmswm on April 16, 2013, 01:02:49 PM
When eating hot ramen noodles, take care not to dump the contents of the bowl down your shirt.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Midnight Kitty on April 16, 2013, 03:08:34 PM
If you're eating a steak on a paper plate at a work barbeque, eat it on a table.  Not on your lap.  I cut right through the plate and put yucky greasy meat juice all over my formerly white shorts.
There, fixed that for ya >:D

I may have mentioned it on another topic, but I once wore a pristine white skirt to work.  Unfortunately, my menstrual cycle started that morning.  I had some supplies at work (& in my purse, always be prepared!), so I took the normal precautions and a Midol and continued with my work day.  It must have been a Wednesday because a group of us always went to a sushi restaurant for lunch on Wednesdays.  On this particular day, the company president's wife joined us worker bees for sushi.  She sat next to me.  When I got up to leave at the end of lunch, it looked like I had sat in a red puddle.  The Midol worked and I had no idea the flow was that heavy.

The company president's wife was a classy lady.  She got an old blanket out of her car, wrapped it around me, took me to her home, and loaned me a black skirt to wear for the rest of the day while she treated the stains in my white skirt and washed it for me.  I was embarrassed when the company president returned my skirt to me.  He didn't know what my skirt was doing in his laundry and I didn't fill him in.  He was clearly curious as he handed me my skirt, but I just said, "Thank you" and went back to work. :-[
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Shalamar on April 16, 2013, 03:12:11 PM
I think I read somewhere that the definition of class is the ability to make anyone feel at ease in any situation.  Your president's wife obviously qualifies.  What a nice thing to do! 
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Diane AKA Traska on April 16, 2013, 03:24:14 PM
I think I read somewhere that the definition of class is the ability to make anyone feel at ease in any situation.  Your president's wife obviously qualifies.  What a nice thing to do!

My definition applies too... acting around those of a "lower station" as if you were on equal footing.
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: VorFemme on April 16, 2013, 09:07:03 PM
He can't *see* the candle is burning? He has to be told?

If you're asking about VorGuy, at the time he was almost legally blind without his glasses.....so, yeah, he might not have been able to see it (the room was fairly well lit and it was daylight outside).  It is more likely that he just set the lid to one side without thinking about it (I've joked about him being an absent minded professor, if he ever gets a Ph.D. - in the meantime, he only has two bachelor's degrees and two masters' degrees - and was working as an instructor at a university at the time).

He had Lasik (laser surgery) for the near-sightedness a little over couple of years ago.  He is very happy NOT wearing prescription glasses!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: VorFemme on April 16, 2013, 09:19:34 PM
Do not try to cut through pins with the sewing scissors.  It will not do the pins any good, and it will seriously nick the scissors.

Furthermore, don't iron fabric with pins still there. It'll melt the pinheads.

Make sure *every* pin is removed before you try on a freshly sewn-and-ironed top - use a magnet if you have to because you will have missed a pin, it will be HOT from the iron and it will STICK into the skin unde your arm when you try the top on, burning and piercing you at the same time!

I have a lovely scar and the bloodstain never fully came out of that top.

If "Grandma" sends a hand made outfit for the grandbaby - check it for sewn in pins.  She also thought that my washing red & green fabric before cutting & sewing it was a silly superstition......

Pin in the sewn shut elastic casing for a two year old.  Washed doll clothes with toddler clothes made from fabric she'd given me - left over from fabrics she'd just used to make a complete baby set (sheets, quilt, dust ruffle for under the crib, bumpers, etc. - back in the 1980s, so they still used bumpers in cribs).  The print was set off by a lovely bright crayon RED.....which bled everywhere on that load of clothes.

I warned MIL to rinse & keep rinsing the first time she washed the quilt, dust ruffle, and bumpers because if the fabric sat for any length of time or got stuck in the dryer....it would be permanent.

I don't remember if that dust ruffle, quilt, and crib bumpers ever got used again......it's been 25 years or so.....I suppose I could ask.  But I have a hunch that "no one would remember" or at least, no one would tell me......because she did start sharing that silly superstition about red and green quilt fabrics........

She really liked the feel of the crisp new fabric just off the bolt - washing it first made it feel "used" or something.  She quit using the bright reds and greens most likely to bleed dye.....or rinsed a small piece out by hand & put it on a white paper towel to "check" for bleeding before getting a lot of patches hand sewn together after that!
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: amandaelizabeth on April 17, 2013, 12:32:40 AM
"When you're doing a formal event outdoors in the evening, take the time to aim the bug repellent at your legs - don't reach up under your skirt and spray willy-nilly."

What was Willynilly doing under your skirt?

Sorry could not resist
Title: Re: Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.
Post by: Luci