Etiquette Hell

A Civil World. Off-topic discussions on a variety of topics. Guests, register for forum membership to see all the boards. => Time For a Coffee Break! => Topic started by: violinp on April 04, 2012, 02:41:16 PM

Title: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: violinp on April 04, 2012, 02:41:16 PM
This story is a couple of years old, but here goes:

BG: I was bullied a lot in school. A middle school teacher of mine - let's call her Umbridge - was complicit in and joined in the bullying, and her treatment of me was partially the set - off for my deep depression. After my eighth grade year, she was moved around to several schools, but I didn't keep track of her whereabouts (I only knew because I saw her at several elementary schools when the orchestra visited). /end BG.

I was taking an elective literature class my senior year of high school. On the first day of the semester, I walked into the room before class was due to start, and I saw...Umbridge. A teacher who was one of my biggest bullies was sitting there at the teacher's desk doing work. The classroom was empty but for we two. I think I froze for a bit - I was too in shock to say anything - but I managed to sit down in a desk that faced away from her so I could collect myself. I was panicking, thinking that the schedule had been changed, and now I would have to refuse to take this class, because there was no way I was going to put myself through another minute of having that woman as my teacher.

Suddenly, other kids came in, and so did the teacher who was scheduled to teach the class. Apparently, Umbridge had been teaching a class scheduled in that room before my class and was just finishing up some paperwork. I secretly breathed a sigh of relief...until Umbridge was leaving and walked past me. She gripped my shoulder and said to my teacher, "And this one is really good at writing, aren't you?...aren't you?" My hands started to shake, and every evil thing I'd thought about her came into my mind, but I knew it wouldn't look good to bawl out a teacher, especially in front of a bunch of people who didn't know me or my history with this teacher. So all I did was clench my jaw and nod.

It may not have been cathartic, but at least I came out smelling like roses and not Dungbombs.
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: SeptGurl on April 04, 2012, 04:08:26 PM
It's good that you were able to maintain your composure. This is the sort of thing that makes you wonder why some people wind up teaching.

I had a similar experience with my high school geometry teacher, Mr. Ick. He had no use for students who didn't understand the subject and would torment those of us who struggled with it. And by torment, I mean that we were the ones who were called to the board to work problems in front of the class. When we couldn't complete them, he'd make fun of us. If he called on us and we didn't know the answer, he would humiliate us by implying we were too stupid to grasp the material. Needless to say, I wasn't doing well in the class. My parents were informed that I was having trouble, and they required me to stay after class under the assumption that Ick would help me learn geometry concepts.

Well ... Ick had already decided that the problem was that I just wasn't doing my homework. He told me in no uncertain terms that I was expected to get my homework done, and he was going to the lounge. So, instead of helping me, I wound up sitting alone in his classroom in an odd detention/study hall situation in which I was expected to complete the homework by myself. Of course, I couldn't do the work. I didn't understand it. And that's why I was there for help. It took a few attempts at this for my parents to understand that it wasn't me. It was him. We agreed that I would do the best I could in the class and leave it at that.

Flash forward about 6 years, and I was at my university's student union taking care of some business right before graduation. Out walks Ick. He took one look at me and said, "What are you doing here?" as if it were beyond comprehension that I might be in college. I told him that I was graduating. His response, "Really?!" Ugh.

Silence was about all I could muster in that situation.
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: JacklynHyde on April 04, 2012, 05:06:14 PM
When I was in elementary school, I was constantly teased by a teacher who wasn't even mine.  Apparently, on my sixth birthday, I accidentally said I was five.  Miss Keller heard it, and for the rest of the time I was at that elementary school, I was "Jacklyn Five", said in a ridiculous manner.  It would get me so annoyed!  I was bullied enough by my classmates and didn't need it from a teacher.  Finally, at the end of my time in elementary school, I ran into Miss Keller again in the hallway.  She wiggled her fingers and, again, teasingly called me "Jacklyn Five".  I simply stared at her, with my best 11-year-old expression of complete exasperation.  Miss Keller finally blinked, walked away, and never spoke to me again.  Good.
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: DottyG on April 04, 2012, 05:53:03 PM
This thread really makes me angry.




(at these "teachers" - not at y'all)

Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: missmolly on April 04, 2012, 05:59:37 PM
This thread really makes me angry.




(at these "teachers" - not at y'all)

POD. I'm currently training to be a teacher, I could never imagine being so cruel to a child.
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: Nikko-chan on April 04, 2012, 09:14:27 PM
Had a teacher in sixth grade that was MEAN! She would yell at me for reading ahead (quick reader :)), yell at me for forgetting homework (I forgot because her yelling made me too anxious to remember). I ended up getting a D in that class (Reading) one of my best subjects!
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: Diane AKA Traska on April 04, 2012, 09:20:58 PM
For my freshman year of high school, I had an art teacher and an English teacher who were involved.  Apparently they would get together at the beginning of the year, pick a student they both had at random, and that student would be their "project" for scorn.

Guess who won that lottery?
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: Kaesha on April 05, 2012, 01:20:23 PM
I got 'revenge' on one of my mean teachers (first grade).  She told us that we were not allowed to read ahead our workbooks, and she yelled at a kid who accidentally broke his plastic ruler and made him cry.  I found out that we were moving and I would have to change schools, so on my very last day I filled out the last page of my workbook and broke my plastic ruler on purpose.  Sweet, sweet revenge for a 5 year old soul...  >:D
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: JacklynHyde on April 05, 2012, 09:56:45 PM
If it makes you feel better, I became a teacher specifically to work with those kids who need a little extra attention and protection.  My kids know I'm a safe haven.  That is so important to me!
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: Asharah on April 08, 2012, 12:54:42 PM
To OP, I wonder what Umbridge would have done if you had responded with a blank stare and "Do I know you?" as if you didn't even remember her because she was so insignificant.  Might have thaken the wind right out of her sails.  ;)
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: violinp on April 08, 2012, 02:12:52 PM
To OP, I wonder what Umbridge would have done if you had responded with a blank stare and "Do I know you?" as if you didn't even remember her because she was so insignificant.  Might have thaken the wind right out of her sails.  ;)

Oh, she thought quite a lot of herself; I'm sure it would've taken her aback. However, I didn't trust myself to speak without spewing every bit of venom I had on the woman.

I truly despised her by this point, not only for stuff for she did to me, but for things she did to others - she had forced all of us to give our vocab books "back" to her at the end of the year, which we paid for, simply because she assumed we would sell them to upcoming students, complained that we were such a burden to teach, because she had to teach us both literature and grammar (the horror! ::)),  sent kids to the principal for supposedly starting a hand sanitizer fight, when they were the ones attacked by a bully (she wouldn't even listen to them), and even interrupted another teacher's class to bully one of my sister's classmates.

I've had some pretty bad teachers, but that woman was one of the worst. In case any of you were wondering, she's no longer in my hometown school system. Whether she's in another system I don't know, but I'm glad she's at least out of this one.
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: violinp on April 08, 2012, 02:26:44 PM
If it makes you feel better, I became a teacher specifically to work with those kids who need a little extra attention and protection.  My kids know I'm a safe haven.  That is so important to me!

 :D I'm glad there are good teachers out there! I rarely had any teachers that actually protected me. My fifth grade teacher was one of those.

When I was scolded by my fourth grade teacher, and I started to cry, she would tell me, "You can't cry in fifth grade! They'll send you to the principal!" Yes, that's what was supposed to stop me from freaking out and crying. I was also a sensitive plant, and would cry if anyone was being scolded near me, because yelling and loud voices scared me.

One day in fifth grade, she was telling off the class, and I started to cry. I put my head down so I wouldn't be seen and taken to the principal. The teacher thought I was laughing and told me to put my head up. When she saw my red and swollen face, she asked me, "Violinp, what's wrong?" I begged her, "Just don't send me to the principal's office," and told her what had been told me. She immediately told me that was a horrible lie, and she would never send me to the principal for crying.

This was at the beginning of the day. When my sister got to my teacher's class at the end of the day, my teacher was still mad that I had been told such a dirty lie. She actually came up to Cabbage and said, "Cabbage, I am so sorry for what your sister had to go through." The next semester, my old fourth grade teacher had been reassigned to teaching first grade. I don't know what exactly happened, but I'm sure my fifth grade teacher had a hand in it.
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: cabbagegirl28 on April 08, 2012, 03:31:59 PM
To OP, I wonder what Umbridge would have done if you had responded with a blank stare and "Do I know you?" as if you didn't even remember her because she was so insignificant.  Might have thaken the wind right out of her sails.  ;)

Oh, she thought quite a lot of herself; I'm sure it would've taken her aback. However, I didn't trust myself to speak without spewing every bit of venom I had on the woman.

I truly despised her by this point, not only for stuff for she did to me, but for things she did to others - she had forced all of us to give our vocab books "back" to her at the end of the year, which we paid for, simply because she assumed we would sell them to upcoming students, complained that we were such a burden to teach, because she had to teach us both literature and grammar (the horror! ::)),  sent kids to the principal for supposedly starting a hand sanitizer fight, when they were the ones attacked by a bully (she wouldn't even listen to them), and even interrupted another teacher's class to bully one of my sister's classmates.

I've had some pretty bad teachers, but that woman was one of the worst. In case any of you were wondering, she's no longer in my hometown school system. Whether she's in another system I don't know, but I'm glad she's at least out of this one.

To make it even better, Umbridge was my homeroom teacher. We had to eat grits and listen to "I Am A Rock, I Am An Island" because it was so "deeeep". Now, I love Simon and Garfunkel, but I still can't take that song or grits seriously because of that woman.

The lit and grammar thing, one of my classmates asked her, "Well, if it was so much easier at your old school, why don't you just go back?" It truly was asked innocently; that person doesn't have a mean bone in his body. But I had to put my head down so I didn't laugh and get in trouble along with the kid.

From stuff she said in class, I know she had it out for certain students. I was one of the lucky ones she didn't treat poorly. Oddly enough, the kid who stood on a table and called himself Jesus Christ, which was an actual issue, didn't bother her, but my classmate being unable to write or draw (in her eyes) deserved to be tortured in the next class (yes, the kid violinp talked about for whom she disrupted another teacher's class).

She was all kinds of weird, and should not have been teaching. That's the nicest thing I can say about her.
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: jeni on April 13, 2012, 03:43:30 AM
I agree, some people should just never be teachers.  Sad to read about some of these experiences.  It brings back memories.

When I was in fourth grade the teacher I had used to point out individuals at random to test them on the times tables, if you got it wrong, you got another chance (at a different sum) and if you got it wrong again you had to go up to the front of the class and get whacked on the back of the legs by a big wooden ruler (like a half metre long ruler, not the small kind).  That was over 30 years ago now (yikes, how time flies).

This teacher also insisted that the word 'fridge' was incorrect and that the correct abbreviation and term was 'frig' (as in twig) since there was no 'D' in the word refrigerator. LOL, my goodness.

Anyway about 25 years after primary school, I read in the local newspaper that she and her husband were running a small corner store in one the suburbs of this city and that she was subject to an assault by a would-be thief.  I couldn't help but wonder if he was a former student.

When I read the story it brought back bad memories and I had no sympathy for her at all.  Not sure what kind of person that makes me.  I am generally very sympathetic, but not on this occasion.

Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: Hollanda on April 13, 2012, 04:56:25 AM
My Science teacher yelled so hard in my ear that he burst my ear drum.  ITA,some people really should not be teachers!  >:(   OP, it sounds to me as though your teacher did actually have a lot of respect for your writing and thought you had talent. That goes no way to excusing her behaviour - she was intimidating and unnecessarily so. She's clearly got issues, you dealt with that just fine!  :)
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: violinp on April 13, 2012, 09:27:45 AM
My Science teacher yelled so hard in my ear that he burst my ear drum.  ITA,some people really should not be teachers!  >:(   OP, it sounds to me as though your teacher did actually have a lot of respect for your writing and thought you had talent. That goes no way to excusing her behaviour - she was intimidating and unnecessarily so. She's clearly got issues, you dealt with that just fine!  :)

No, she just wanted to take credit for having a smart student, probably. And the way she did it felt like an intimidation technique - who seriously grips a kid's arm (to be fair, I was almost 18, but still) while talking about them normally?
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: Hollanda on April 13, 2012, 10:12:14 AM
My Science teacher yelled so hard in my ear that he burst my ear drum.  ITA,some people really should not be teachers!  >:(   OP, it sounds to me as though your teacher did actually have a lot of respect for your writing and thought you had talent. That goes no way to excusing her behaviour - she was intimidating and unnecessarily so. She's clearly got issues, you dealt with that just fine!  :)

No, she just wanted to take credit for having a smart student, probably. And the way she did it felt like an intimidation technique - who seriously grips a kid's arm (to be fair, I was almost 18, but still) while talking about them normally?

Never thought of it that way... :( I thought over enthusiastic and inappropriate...
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: whatsanenigma on April 13, 2012, 10:47:43 AM
I am really enjoying following this topic and probably will eventually contribute, but I am afraid it is getting off the topic of "complete silence".  Would anyone object to asking a mod to move this thread to "time for a coffee break" (or whereever else the mod might find appropriate) so we don't end up getting a very good thread locked? I'm not the OP so I didn't want to overstep my bounds here, but I'd really like to not lose this thread as it's going and I don't think it would be of benefit to "just get it back on track" as IMHO we have exhausted that aspect of it.
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: DottyG on April 13, 2012, 12:14:05 PM
I've "reported" it to see if it should be moved.  We'll see if it can, so it can be kept open. :)

Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: whatsanenigma on April 13, 2012, 01:03:43 PM
Great, thanks!
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: snowflake on April 13, 2012, 01:37:04 PM
Silence is the best response.

My mother has a mental illness.  She had good years and bad years and everyone knew it during the bad ones.  I want to say for the record that she was a PAIN to reason with/ work with/ etc.  I have a couple of older siblings and they knew from the start that I was the crazy woman's daughter.  I'm sure some of my old teachers would find the SS thread and post to no end about my mother.

That said, I still don't get why some of the teachers took it out on me.  Twenty years later, I've worked a few years as an aide in a "special" classroom and I've fostered children of the mentally incompetent.  So I really do get it that some adults can't function in the world and drive you up the wall.  And yeah, I know that society is not interested in paying people enough to deal with them.  But really?

But why the heck would you take it out on the children???

The only answer I could find (after seeing this cycle repeated) was that some teachers still want to be popular.  So they'll go along with whatever the crowd thinks so they don't look like a responsible kill-joy. 
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: Hijinks on April 13, 2012, 01:55:51 PM
Never had a teacher be mean to me per se, but one was used as part of my abuse.

We had a long-term sub in 8th grade science.  She didn't care for me and was tired of me whispering to my one friend (in practically the whole school lol) so she made me change seats and sit up at a table in front of her desk, with my back to the rest of the class.

Well this just made my tormentors absolutely gleeful in that they could pick on me all class long.  They started asking her if she liked bacon, pork chops, etc.  She'd respond "yes" and then they'd say something like "well there's a big ol' one sitting right there!!"  (I was fat and have a pug nose)  I don't know if she ever figured out what they were doing - she usually just rolled her eyes or ignored them - but I'd usually just sit there and cry.
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: DottyG on April 13, 2012, 02:11:21 PM
I hate that we have to have this thread. :(  I wish none of this had happened to everyone here and that there wasn't even a reason for the thread to begin with.

Hijinks, that's just so wrong. :(  I wish I could hug that 8th grader in you.

Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: *new*mommyagain36 on April 13, 2012, 02:31:16 PM
I had a second grade teacher who was so very horrible.  I'll call her Mrs. Frankenstein, because she was a monster to me and because her last name is similiar.
She never had a pleasant word to say to me.  I have no idea why.  Honestly, I can remember thinking "what did I ever do to you lady?" every time she made a snide remark. 
For Spelling class you had to write a sentence containing the words for the week.  She would read from my paper and then comment "no" or "that is ridiculous" just really snotty comments.  It never occurred to me to say anything to anybody about it.  I just thought she was *mean* and figured I could escape from her class when I went on the third grade.
When my Mom went to conferences she would tell me all the positive things Mrs. F had said and that Mrs. F thought I was a very good student.  So, She was smiling and saying nice things to my Mom but then acting ridiculous to me all day, every day.
When Mrs. Frankenstein retired I was in high school.  Each class was asked to write a memory of her for a book the school was presenting as a gift.  I flat out refused.  I can remember the school secretary calling me and asking for my contribution.  I told her no way.  When she asked me why I told her that Mrs. F was hands down the meanest, rudest, nastiest teacher I had ever had to endure and there was no way I was participating in creating a gift for her.  The secretary was silent for a moment and then said, "ok"
I secretly hoped that my words somehow got back to Mrs. F but I have no idea if the did or not.

I am sad that others had endured the mean actions of their teachers.  It just should never happen to any kid, ever.
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: Cami on April 13, 2012, 02:44:26 PM
When I was in kindergarten, I had a teacher whose only interaction with  living creatures should have been slopping hogs. Vicious young woman. She loathed me.  My mother had told her that I didn't do naps, but I woud lie quietly on my blanket. The woman exploded and insisted that all of her kids would sleep.  My mother pointed out that you cannot actually force someone to sleep. So when it was naptime, she would stand over me, tap her foot and hiss, "Are you asleep? Are you? You need to sleep. I'm not  leaving until you sleep. What's wrong with you? You're not normal." When we had treats, we would always "run out" of them before she got to me. When it was time for show and tell, I always had to go last and we always ran out of time before it was my turn.  When the entire class would win a prize, she'd announce, "Everyone gets a prize except for Cami. She never deserves a prize because she's a bad bad girl." One time I had a massive ear infection and started to cry because it hurt so badly. She refused to let me go to the nurse until other kids in the class started to cry in sympathy with me and a boy basically started to yell at her for being mean. Then she shoved me out the door and told me, "Get away, you big crybaby. Go cry cry cry somewhere else."  Her name was Miss Hoffman and I hope she's roasting somewhere toasty.

Note that my parents never believed me about her. My father was bamboozled by the fact that she was a young and pretty female who was always flirting with him. My mother... who knows?

When my dd was in 2nd grade, she was put into a classroom with a teacher everyone hated. I didn't know it because we were new to the town. She was HORRIBLE. A horrible human being, who  like my kindergarten teacher, should not be allowed around living creatures.  The good thing was that she picked on almost everyone -- an equal opportunity bully. But she ended up not picking on my dd because I told dd to talk back to her and if there was a problem, I'd go to the mattresses for her on it.  Interestingly, when my dd started to talk back to her, the woman totally backed down and then was sweet as pie to her.

Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: Clareish on April 13, 2012, 03:32:02 PM
I never really had any really bad teachers. I do remember a french teacher who gave us lists and lists of verb conjugations, and then we had to take weekly tests on them. If you got perfect, you could sit out the remaining tests for the year. I have a horrible memory for language. Guess who got to write the last few weeks worth of tests all by herself in a class of 30 while the other students got to play games and have snacks? That was grade 8. Funny thing was, I did like that teacher, just not his style.

The worst thing I have experienced is seeing teachers who should not be teachers in my university placements. I have never been placed under their supervision, but you see them with their students in the class and wonder why they ever decided on this career when it is clear they actively dislike kids? Even more upsetting, their behaviour is rarely a shock to the other teachers or administrators. In my province, the teachers unions are so strict and difficult, that it is pretty impossible to fire a teacher. Problem teachers might get shifted to another school, but that's about it. There's really nothing that can be done, and it is so incredibly frustrating watching kids get treated this way. (for the record, I'm not talking about physical abuse, but rather no patience with children, no understanding of learning styles, etc.)

Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: doodlemor on April 13, 2012, 04:18:09 PM
I also became a teacher partly in reaction to being treated poorly by a teacher.  I can remember when I was a little girl thinking that when I grew up I would be a *nice*teacher. 

Her name was Miss Gong, and she must have been an incredibly unhappy person.  She specialized in making her first and second graders stand beside their desks while she yelled and ridiculed and *balled them out.*  Any child who made a comment in self defense was yelled at more.  For some offenses the child would be subjected to this more than once a day over a period of several days.  Her comments[interrogations]  were cutting and cruel.  I remember being reprimanded for things my *brother* did, for goodness sake.  At some point in my teens I read about living in a totalitarian society, and realized that Miss Gong's classroom had been like that.

There were no controls on this woman, as she was also the building principal of a small school.  The other teacher in the building was basically kind, but Miss Gong tended to enter her classroom and do the whole sadistic routine for many of the "offenses" committed there.  Unfortunately I was in that small school for five years, grades 1 - 5, and thought of teachers as enemies when I left.

I did do a mischievous thing to get even with her *pet* when I was in second grade.  There was one little girl who was a family friend of Miss Gong, and used to call her Aunt Gert even though they were not blood relatives.

After our Art class we were required to clean up the little scraps of paper and blobs of old fashioned paste from the floor around our desks.  Then we had to *sit tall* and straight with our hands folded.  One day I cleaned my area and sat in the approved way, only to be yelled at for leaving scraps and paste under my desk. 

As Miss Gong yelled at me that day I realized that she was fallible, that she could be wrong.  The little pile under my desk was in the exact shape that a child's hand uses when scootching a little pile of scraps and paper together to pick up off the floor.  I was really surprised that Miss Gong didn't realize this, but didn't dare tell her.  It was obvious to me that someone had planted the mess under my desk.

Her favorite pet, Harriet, sat beside me.  As I stood there being yelled at and ridiculed she sat very tall and didn't look my way.  I decided, rightly or wrongly, that Harriet had set me up.

The next time we did cutting and pasting in Art I waited until Harriet was done cleaning her area, and was sitting tall with her hands folded looking straight ahead.  Then I carefully tossed all of my paper scraps and paste blobs under her desk, being careful to distribute them evenly in case Miss Gong had figured out about the hand shape thing.

Harriet did get reprimanded, but not nearly as hard as everyone else always did.  I can still remember her saying, "But Aunt Gert....."

Miss Gong finally did get some just desserts, of a sort.  When I was in college a little boy was in her classroom who came from a very sad background.  When he used inappropriate language she literally *washed his mouth out with soap.*  I don't know all the details - the whole situation ended being headlines in our small town newspaper.  Miss Gong apparently washed his mouth out several times.  One morning the poor little 5 or 6 year old decided not to go to school, and he started walking the other way.  Someone who sighted him on the highway several miles out of town was concerned enough to stop and check on him, and the whole terrible story became front page news.

Miss Gong didn't lose her job immediately, but she did retire at the end of the year.  I never did hear any backstairs gossip about the whole thing, so I don't know what all of the repercussions may have been for the school district.
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: ShanghaiJill on April 13, 2012, 06:20:43 PM
I had a fourth grade teacher who hated me so much that other kids noticed and consoled me. 

Funny thing, she married some VIP.   Our city had a downtown mall where the high school kids hung out after school.  There was  a portrait studio, where Hateful Teacher's family portrait was among the display photos on the wall.   Someone had taken a pen and poked the eyes out on her picture.

I felt vindicated, I wasn't alone. :)
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: Soprych on April 13, 2012, 08:54:58 PM
I attended a Catholic school and for whatever reason Sister Mary Kenneth - may her poor tormented soul rot in hell - hated me.  I broken my left arm and she took it personally, somehow it was because I did not want to learn to print nicely.  Because of my tongue is very large, think Gene Simmons, I spoke with a pronounced lisp, Sister Mary Kenneth felt it was because I was pretending to be tweet bird.   Worse I committed the ultimate cardinal sin that a first grader could commit.  I could read.

I did have my "I did the only thing I could do moment".  I cannot drink milk.  I told Sister that so she gave me chocolate milk and a tuna fish sandwich.  I told her I can't eat or drink this but she would hear none of that.  I eat it told sister I didn't feel well promptly walked to the front of the room and projectile vomited all over her.  It truly was the only thing I could do.  I never had to drink milk or eat tuna again though.
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: Diane AKA Traska on April 13, 2012, 09:08:40 PM
I had a second grade teacher who was so very horrible.  I'll call her Mrs. Frankenstein, because she was a monster to me and because her last name is similiar.

You had Mrs Fronkensteen too?
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: gramma dishes on April 13, 2012, 09:15:12 PM
 :(  I was a second grade teacher.  Good grief!  I hear these stories!  They're awful!  Yet, it's scary.  I have to wonder what my second graders are saying about me now nearly 50 years later!  I LOVED my kids.  I hope they knew that.
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: Kimblee on April 13, 2012, 09:42:50 PM
:(  I was a second grade teacher.  Good grief!  I hear these stories!  They're awful!  Yet, it's scary.  I have to wonder what my second graders are saying about me now nearly 50 years later!  I LOVED my kids.  I hope they knew that.

I bet they knew. My first grade teacher was a saint. She was a little old lady with a cane and the tiniest, sweetest voice and she had very old fashioned ideas. Like handwriting lessons and reading to us out of books like The Wizard of Oz and Winnie the Pooh. The originals, not the picture books.

The only time she ever raised her voice was when she was praising us, scolding was done out in the hall and in a whisper. (ex: "Now Kimblee, its not nice to throw glue sticks. I know you were upset at Billy, but you can't do that. And Billy, Kimblee didn't like being pushed anymore than you liked getting hit with a glue stick. You are classmates and should be helping each other not fighting. Now appologize and go sit down. i won't have to punish you will I? No? Because you've learned? Good... Very good.") But do something she was proud of and the next county might hear. lol

Even though she was quiet and gentle, she ran a tight ship. I remember over hearing the prinicipal commenting that all year he hadn't heard any complaints about her students. Everyone loved her, and we knew we were loved back. I just wish everyone could have such a good teacher.
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: doodlemor on April 13, 2012, 10:06:26 PM
:(  I was a second grade teacher.  Good grief!  I hear these stories!  They're awful!  Yet, it's scary.  I have to wonder what my second graders are saying about me now nearly 50 years later!  I LOVED my kids.  I hope they knew that.

I taught grades 1 through 5 at various times, and I LOVED my kids, too.

 
I had a second grade teacher who was so very horrible.  I'll call her Mrs. Frankenstein, because she was a monster to me and because her last name is similiar.

I taught with a nasty 2nd grade teacher like that, with a similar name.  Was this in upstate NY?  She once asked me to watch her class for a few minutes.  I went in and talked to them a bit, and then I told them how good they were.  A sweet little girl raised her hand and said something like

"She tells us we're very bad."

This broke my heart, but as a 2nd year teacher there was little I could do about it.  The witch  woman was near retirement, and the principal was a doofus who didn't want to do his job, [or rock the boat.]

We had a screaming, nasty 5th grade teacher, about four principals and almost 20 years later.  This guy knew what was going on, but seemed unable to confront her because she was very pretty and rather sexy.  Fortunately she moved away.  Hopefully her next principal was a woman who was immune to her *charms.*
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: Asharah on April 15, 2012, 11:13:52 AM
When I was in elementary school, I was constantly teased by a teacher who wasn't even mine.  Apparently, on my sixth birthday, I accidentally said I was five.  Miss Keller heard it, and for the rest of the time I was at that elementary school, I was "Jacklyn Five", said in a ridiculous manner.  It would get me so annoyed!  I was bullied enough by my classmates and didn't need it from a teacher.  Finally, at the end of my time in elementary school, I ran into Miss Keller again in the hallway.  She wiggled her fingers and, again, teasingly called me "Jacklyn Five".  I simply stared at her, with my best 11-year-old expression of complete exasperation.  Miss Keller finally blinked, walked away, and never spoke to me again.  Good.
Somebody should have told Miss Keller that an elementary school teacher taunting a child is like somebody teaching a pig to sing. It accomplishes nothing except to make the person look like an idiot.  >:(
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: Thipu1 on April 15, 2012, 12:14:34 PM
I suppose I've been fortunate but I never had a really bad teacher until I was in Graduate Library school. 

She taught an advanced cataloging course and gave the craziest assignments.  She would take sentences from the NY Times and require us to provide Library of Congress cataloging records for them.   An example was, 'New York University is digitizing its slide collection'.  Each weekly assignment included at least a dozen of these doozies. 

I'd been doing original cataloging for about ten years before taking the course.  I was an 'amateur' cataloger but I showed my work to 'professional' catalogers and they assured me what I did looked fine to them.  However, with this woman, I could do nothing right. 

For every course in Grad School, it was always my practice to arrange a meeting with the Prof in which we could talk about differences of opinion in a professional manner.  This usually worked out well.  It was not the case with this woman.  She informed me that I was a 'classic B student'. 

Excuse me, you don't take elective courses in Grad School to earn a B. 

She was also very interested in my Uber-Boss (can you say 'pumped' me for information?)

This Prof. came along about the time of Umbrage and also looked like Umbrage.  She was vile on many levels.   
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: SeptGurl on April 15, 2012, 02:58:16 PM
:(  I was a second grade teacher.  Good grief!  I hear these stories!  They're awful!  Yet, it's scary.  I have to wonder what my second graders are saying about me now nearly 50 years later!  I LOVED my kids.  I hope they knew that.

I bet they knew. My first grade teacher was a saint. She was a little old lady with a cane and the tiniest, sweetest voice and she had very old fashioned ideas. Like handwriting lessons and reading to us out of books like The Wizard of Oz and Winnie the Pooh. The originals, not the picture books.

The only time she ever raised her voice was when she was praising us, scolding was done out in the hall and in a whisper. (ex: "Now Kimblee, its not nice to throw glue sticks. I know you were upset at Billy, but you can't do that. And Billy, Kimblee didn't like being pushed anymore than you liked getting hit with a glue stick. You are classmates and should be helping each other not fighting. Now appologize and go sit down. i won't have to punish you will I? No? Because you've learned? Good... Very good.") But do something she was proud of and the next county might hear. lol

Even though she was quiet and gentle, she ran a tight ship. I remember over hearing the prinicipal commenting that all year he hadn't heard any complaints about her students. Everyone loved her, and we knew we were loved back. I just wish everyone could have such a good teacher.

My high school band director ran a very tight ship. His expectations were very high, and if we didn't meet them, we knew it. He was strong in his leadership, but he wasn't mean. I learned more from him about discipline, responsibility, team work, and pride in accomplishment than I learned from any other teacher I ever had. I count him among my strongest influences. The lessons I learned from him followed me well into adulthood.

Flash forward 25 years ... DH and I joined a new church. Just by coincidence my band director and his wife also are members. I'm beyond thrilled to spend time with him again and to know he'll have an influence on my DS, too.

As a teacher myself (college instructor), one of the best compliments I ever received from a student was that I am tough but fair. I have high expectations of my students just like my band director had high expectations of us, and I expect my students to take responsibility for their performance. Knowing that I am perceived as fair was rewarding to hear.
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: siamesecat2965 on April 15, 2012, 03:53:15 PM
I just remembered the music teacher in my elementary school.  For whatever reason, I don't think she really cared for me.  I don't know why, other than the fact I was and am completely devoid of any musical talent whatsoever. 

Does anyone remember the orff instruments? Kind of like a xylophone?  I don't remember too many of the details, but I believe me and a couple of other kids were supposed to go to the music room and meet with her at lunch to practice for some upcoming concert.  This was what she "allowed" the non-talented or her not favorite students to do.  Now I lived 2 blocks from school, so I went home.  But this day I brought my lunch and stayed, went to her room, and no one showed up, not even the teacher!  I don't know what happened, and probably was too shy to try and find out, so I sat and ate my lunch, and waited for lunch to be over when I could go back to class.
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: Night_owl on April 15, 2012, 04:08:11 PM
My eighth grade math teacher told me I was so stupid I would be lucky to be get a GED and be a waitress or a hair stylist (I don't why she had a hatred of the those jobs).  I wasn't stupid, I have dyslexia.  I was diagnosed at 17.

When I graduated from college with a 3.9 average, I sent her a college announcement and thank her for encouraging me by giving me a chance to prove her wrong.  I took great pleasure in being her nurse several years ago.  I made sure to treat her with respect and professional courtesy.
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: whiterose on April 15, 2012, 04:48:25 PM
Funny "only thing I could do" happened at a Spelling Bee when I was in the 4th grade. The word they gave me was "waltz". It was NOT on the list. I had not heard of it- keep in mind English was our 2nd language. So I misspelled it and was out. The only thing I could do at the moment was pull out my loose tooth and gross everyone out!

English teacher apologized to me later that week since that word turned out to NOT be in the list- yup, my mother and I looked up the list later. I wonder if an apology from her was enough- or if there should have been another run-down in the spelling bee, but what I wanted as compensation at the moment was a new toy.

Did get my revenge the next year when I won :)

~~~~~

I do not recall any specific teachers bullying me on a regular basis...when I was a student, that is.

When I was a teacher at my first school, the principal made my life impossible. Not only that- but my teammates were no good either. One of them, the English teacher in our team, was the worst one. She constantly put me down and demoralized me. She said things like "principal is not going to renew your contract" and "the students do not respect you", as well as refusing to provide me any assistance. The other 3 teachers in our team followed her, but were not as offensive. But it's like everything I did- no matter how harmless it was- drove them up the wall. I wonder if they envied me because I had a Masters degree and they did not- the one lady in the team who did have one did NOT engage in active bullying. The lady who was in the process of getting it was not terrible. The man who did not have one was so-so, but he was only 30 years old. But the main offender may have had various reasons to envy me.

About a year after this, I was subbing at a new school. Both the English teacher and the Social Studies teacher from my old school's team were subbing there. And a former student had me come say hi to the SS one- but the English one we did not see. Which is moot, since before the end of the day, the substitute teacher HQ already had received a DO NOT SEND from that school. The HQ was surprised, since my record was pretty good otherwise. We investigated, but the school did not reply. I deduced it was that those two snitched about me.


~~~

Sadly, at that same first school, I was accused on picking on one particular student. He was the class clown- but in no way did I single him out unfairly, or put him down, or grade him harsher than others. I guess it was just a personality clash. Had I been terminated because of my specific issues with him, I would have understood. But the principal and the teammates bullied me so much: people on Ehell have deduced that they were bullying me on purpose in order to get me to quit voluntarily.
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: wendelenn on April 15, 2012, 07:38:54 PM
this whole thread makes me think of this song from A Chorus Line (and yeah, I know it's from the godawful movie version but. . .)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1awl3cqFYgY (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1awl3cqFYgY)
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: Daquiri40 on April 16, 2012, 09:02:54 AM
Quote
I did have my "I did the only thing I could do moment".  I cannot drink milk.  I told Sister that so she gave me chocolate milk and a tuna fish sandwich.  I told her I can't eat or drink this but she would hear none of that.  I eat it told sister I didn't feel well promptly walked to the front of the room and projectile vomited all over her.  It truly was the only thing I could do.  I never had to drink milk or eat tuna again though.
Ha!  When I was in 3rd grade, we stood in line and got our milk.  Every kid who got chocolate milk would walk back to their desk shaking it up.  It was just done!  :-)  Someone had put a pencil hole in my milk and as I shook it, chocolate milk shook all over Sr. Diane's nice clean black habit.  She started screaming at me and I burst into tears.  She immediately apologized and hugged me.  Ha!  Bursting into tears was the only thing I could do and it worked.
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: Outdoor Girl on April 16, 2012, 09:58:25 AM
My experience was in high school.

I was taking Grade 13 physics (back when we did 5 years of high school).  The teacher for the class was the vice principal of the school and was also running for mayor.  He was frequently late to class and was not a good teacher.  I had A's in all my subjects; I was scoring a D in his class.  But my parents refused to sign the drop form for the class.  I knew I didn't need it for university; I could take one Grade 13 equivalent course which counted towards my 40 course degree.

Then they had the parent teacher interview night.  VP wasn't at his table where he was supposed to be.  My parents finally caught up to him in the middle of the gym and proceeded to talk to him there.  This bacon-fed knave told my father that the reason I was doing so poorly in his class was that 'Girls can't do science'.  My drop form was signed that night.

I took the equivalency course at university and got 96%.  And I graduated with an Honour's BSc in Applied Biochemistry and I'm working in a science field.  But 'Girls can't do science'.
Title: Re: The Only Thing I Could Do...
Post by: weeblewobble on April 19, 2012, 01:13:55 PM
I was generally very well-liked by my teachers, but for some reason a middle school teacher decided I was a lazy, ungrateful wretch with a terrible attitude.  She pulled me out of class (with the door open, so the other kids could hear) to expound on the laundry list of my faults, both as a student and a person, several times.  She let me know in no uncertain terms, I was nothing special and would one day join the ranks of unskilled labor in a salt mine somewhere.

More than twenty years later, I have achieved some considerable, public success in a difficult-to-get-into artistic field.  Many of my teachers have come to my events and I am more than happy to let them know how much I appreciate them and how they contributed to my success.  (Seriously, my English teachers changed my life.)

I ran into Evil Middle School Teacher a few months ago, and she was super-sugary-sweet to me, telling me how PROUD she was of me, and how she ALWAYS knew I would going to make it big some day!  I could have returned her hug and nodded and lied about how she influenced me.  I could have said, "It's nice that you tell yourself that." or "Isn't it strange that someone with such a terrible attitude managed to accomplish something?"  But I didn't.

I stepped out of her hug. I gave her my classic "showing no teeth" tight-lipped smile and turned on my heel, walking away as fast as I could.