Etiquette Hell

General Etiquette => Etiquette of the Rich and Famous => Topic started by: C0mputerGeek on June 13, 2012, 03:14:57 PM

Title: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: C0mputerGeek on June 13, 2012, 03:14:57 PM
Link to article: Model Melissa Stetten Live-Tweets Married Actor Brian Presley’s Attempt To Hit On Her (http://tinyurl.com/7rxjehq)

During a plane ride, Melissa Stetten found herself seated next to a man that: (1) Identified himself as an actor; (2) Wore a wedding ring; and (3) Kept hitting her.

Annoyed by his advances, Melissa tweeted the conversation with this man. She provided his first name, Brian. Her tweets are public. Based on the information she tweeted, someone in her Twitter stream identified the actor in question. Brian is actor Brian Presley. He is married, with a five-year-old kid.

Brian Presley denies the encounter took place.

Melissa has gotten some backlash over the whole thing. The Daily Mail called her out as a liar based on a joke she tweeted about winning the lottery and the fact that she lies about her age (this is fairly common amongst models).

IIRC, etiquette does not permit one to out a cheating spouse. I would assume this extends to live tweeting a conversation with enough details for the public to identify the celebrity in question. I do not feel sorry for the actor. He is married and should not be hitting on other people. Melissa did not provide his last name, someone else did.

What say you eHellions?
Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: #borecore on June 13, 2012, 03:22:49 PM
First, I thought the tweets were hilarious and I find Stetten's blog pretty witty, too.

BUT from an etiquette standpoint, what she did was uncouth and inappropriate. That's probably why it's funny.  ???
Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: JoieGirl7 on June 13, 2012, 03:30:15 PM
I don't see anything wrong with what she did.
 
He had no expectation of privacy with a stranger on an airplane.  And it's a redeye, he was being rude to her and everyone else around them by trying to socialize so much.
Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: Judah on June 13, 2012, 03:45:43 PM
As long she had been clear with him that she wasn't interested I actually don't see anything wrong with what she did.
Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: StuffedGrapeLeaves on June 13, 2012, 04:10:21 PM
What is she doing tweeting while on a plane ride?  I thought you're not supposed to use the wireless capabilities on your phone or computer while flying.

If it's true, I don't think she did anything wrong.  I would think differently if she encourages him to talk just for the purpose of tweeting about it and making fun of him. 
Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: WillyNilly on June 13, 2012, 04:11:37 PM
She didn't do it to ruin him, or even out him, she was being hit on by an annoying guy and tweeted.  Such is life.  That someone else identified him, oh well.

I mean would this have been different if it happened 10, 20, 40 years ago and she had been a guest on The Tonight Show and told the country about the annoying guy simply named "Brian" who would not shut up and opened a sunny window on a redeye flight?  Same situation different forum, same outcome. 
Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: Yvaine on June 13, 2012, 04:14:25 PM
I don't see it as all that bad--from the tone of her tweets, I don't think she even actually believed he was a real actor at first, and Brian is a pretty common name; I think she just thought she was tweeting about Lying Dork Brian Nobody and not someone who could actually be identified. The tweets remind me of our tales on here of the various "Jasons" we've known who are ninja Navy SEAL computer hackers.

And he shouldn't hit on other women in a public place if he wants privacy!
Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: jedikaiti on June 13, 2012, 04:42:29 PM
And, of course, he's saying she lied about the whole thing.

I doubt he's any kind of angel, but I also doubt she is, either.
Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: WillyNilly on June 13, 2012, 04:46:48 PM
And, of course, he's saying she lied about the whole thing.

I doubt he's any kind of angel, but I also doubt she is, either.

Well considering her last Tweet was about him opening the window blind and included a photo of the open window blind, I've gotta say I at least in large part believe her.
Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: hobish on June 13, 2012, 04:49:32 PM
And, of course, he's saying she lied about the whole thing.

I doubt he's any kind of angel, but I also doubt she is, either.

Well considering her last Tweet was about him opening the window blind and included a photo of the open window blind, I've gotta say I at least in large part believe her.

What a cad!

Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: Bramble on June 13, 2012, 05:40:12 PM
What is she doing tweeting while on a plane ride?  I thought you're not supposed to use the wireless capabilities on your phone or computer while flying.

Electronic devices only need to be completely off for takeoff and landing, and many planes these days have WiFi on board.   Most of the smartphones have an "Airplane mode", where the cellular signal is off but it allows WiFi to be used.
Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: Allyson on June 13, 2012, 06:30:02 PM
I don't seen an issue with what she did--she didn't go out of her way to identify him and post details. She just posted about some annoying guy sitting on the plane next to her. It's not like she got his last named and Facebooked his wife.

The person who did seek out his details and figure out who it was might have done something more questionable.

And so what if she isn't an angel? Only perfect people can be in the right?
Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: Hawkwatcher on June 13, 2012, 06:45:24 PM
And, of course, he's saying she lied about the whole thing.

I doubt he's any kind of angel, but I also doubt she is, either.

Why do you think that she is not an angel?
Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: kherbert05 on June 13, 2012, 06:47:40 PM
Haven't other people on the plane called her out as being the liar, saying he was asleep most of the time. I go the impression she threw a snit because he didn't recognize her.
Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: C0mputerGeek on June 13, 2012, 07:58:14 PM
Haven't other people on the plane called her out as being the liar, saying he was asleep most of the time. I go the impression she threw a snit because he didn't recognize her.

The Daily Mail published an article stating that Andy Levy disputed her claims. Is that what you're talking about? Levy says he believes what Melissa tweeted really happened.
Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: Cosmasia on June 14, 2012, 04:30:26 AM
I have zero issues with anything she did.  :)

It's not women's/the world's/everyone else's job to protect this man against getting bad reputations due to his bad actions.
It's up to him to not try to cheat/hit on an uninterested woman/and so on, if he doesn't want it getting out. She has every right to share what happened with whoever she pleases and he needs to suck it up.

She has no responsibility towards his or his family's reputation, he does.
Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: HenrysMom on June 14, 2012, 10:46:28 AM
Let this be a lesson to behave properly or be the subject of a tweet.
Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: Winterlight on June 15, 2012, 11:13:09 AM
Agreed.
I don't see it as all that bad--from the tone of her tweets, I don't think she even actually believed he was a real actor at first, and Brian is a pretty common name; I think she just thought she was tweeting about Lying Dork Brian Nobody and not someone who could actually be identified. The tweets remind me of our tales on here of the various "Jasons" we've known who are ninja Navy SEAL computer hackers.

And he shouldn't hit on other women in a public place if he wants privacy!

Agreed. If he hadn't been hitting on her, then he wouldn't be embarrassed now.
Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: wonderfullyanonymous on June 20, 2012, 10:52:30 AM

Haven't other people on the plane called her out as being the liar, saying he was asleep most of the time. I go the impression she threw a snit because he didn't recognize her.


I read this part, too. That she was mad because she was actually hitting on him and he wasn't taking the bait. If I remember correctly, he told her he was married.
Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: O'Dell on June 20, 2012, 11:16:53 AM
Even if she was tweeting the truth, I still see her actions as distasteful. Why go on and on about someone who is annoying? I wouldn't think much of a celebrity doing this in another public forum such as an interview especially including any sort of identifying details. Twitter is no different.

It's hardly a new thing married men lying that they are single while hitting on an attractive woman. Doesn't seem Twitter worthy let alone multiple tweets.
Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: BabylonSister on June 20, 2012, 02:01:00 PM
Even if she was tweeting the truth, I still see her actions as distasteful. Why go on and on about someone who is annoying? I wouldn't think much of a celebrity doing this in another public forum such as an interview especially including any sort of identifying details. Twitter is no different.

It's hardly a new thing married men lying that they are single while hitting on an attractive woman. Doesn't seem Twitter worthy let alone multiple tweets.


I agree. If you find out someone is cheating, I can see, maybe, with much caution, letting the spouse know. The rest of the world? No. I don't think that what a person does in his/her private life should be in the public eye unless he/she wishes to share. I think the young woman was just looking for free publicity.
Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: C0mputerGeek on June 20, 2012, 03:14:35 PM
Even if she was tweeting the truth, I still see her actions as distasteful. Why go on and on about someone who is annoying? I wouldn't think much of a celebrity doing this in another public forum such as an interview especially including any sort of identifying details. Twitter is no different.

It does not seem strange at all to me. I send out about 30 tweets a day during San Diego Comic Con. If an annoying man kept hitting on me - married or no - I would totally tweet about it.
Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: Ceallach on June 20, 2012, 06:40:18 PM
I think she was trying to be entertaining, and assumed that nobody would ever know exactly who she was talking about (she'd never heard of him, so perhaps didn't occur to her that internet followers *love* verifying that type of information!)

I don't doubt that there's some truth to her tweets, but the best lies are always close to the truth.    I think she was exaggerating for entertaining effect, and using him as her patsy.   So yes, it was rude.   I read a few accounts and from what I can see there was no overt "hitting upon" anyway - as he noted in his response, they made small talk, then he watched the movie.  He never asked her out or implied in any way they should get together.  Her tweets make him out to be a bit of a douche, which may well be true.  However, since when is it ok to publicly mock the person sitting next to you, just for your own amusement?   Definitely rude IMHO, regardless of where the truth lies.  She let the information be too revealing and not generic enough.  If she'd kept it completely generic and not identifiable I'd be fine with it, but she basically left the guy open to public ridicule just for her own amusement.
Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: Virg on June 25, 2012, 03:12:56 PM
Cosmasia wrote:

"It's not women's/the world's/everyone else's job to protect this man against getting bad reputations due to his bad actions.
It's up to him to not try to cheat/hit on an uninterested woman/and so on, if he doesn't want it getting out. She has every right to share what happened with whoever she pleases and he needs to suck it up."

The flip side of this is that she didn't give any firm proof that what she said is really what happened, and he denied the truth of her account.  That means that the problem is that she managed to accuse him without evidence in a way that allowed the public to identify and condemn him for something he may not have done.  I don't see any reason to believe either of them more than the other so I have to say that "his bad actions" is unsupported.

Virg
Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: crella on June 25, 2012, 06:33:58 PM
The only picture that I've seen shows him asleep. It doesn't really bolster what she's saying, and she's been caught fabricating stories in the past.
Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: C0mputerGeek on June 27, 2012, 04:02:12 PM
The only picture that I've seen shows him asleep. It doesn't really bolster what she's saying, and she's been caught fabricating stories in the past.

The lottery ticket was an April Fool's joke.
Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: lilfox on June 28, 2012, 10:45:02 AM
Doesn't seem Twitter worthy let alone multiple tweets.

I admit I don't follow Twitter at all, but my understanding is that just as it has been used to break news stories as they happen, people also frequently use it to broadcast the most mundane aspects of their lives, like what color socks they have on or what they ate for breakfast or worse, TMI-level things.  I'm not sure the bar for "Twitter worthy" is all that high for a large number of people.   ;)

I think this is one of those examples where someone's reputation can be so easily trashed without recourse, which is rude if not libelous.  I don't know that the airplane qualifies as a truly public forum - if they were having a quiet conversation, I believe they each had some expectation of privacy.  Maybe she voluntarily broke it but he didn't.  Would she have been as amused if someone in a neighboring seat overheard/eavesdropped and live-Tweeted the conversation?  Probably not, since she wouldn't be controlling the information or more importantly, the attention.
Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: crella on June 28, 2012, 04:07:18 PM
Quote
Why go on and on about someone who is annoying?

Yes, why not shut him down once and for all? Tweet after Tweet about how she can't believe this guy? After a very sharp "I said I'm not interested" how many men would go on in the close confines of a plane? I go the impression that she let him go on and didn't try to stop him (if what she says is true) in order to keep Tweeting.

Chatting someone up isn't cheating (yet). It still isn't proof he's the scum of the earth. He's in AA so there's no proof he was drinking either. It's obvious that she had no idea who he was. The whole thing smacks of 'this loser dared to talk to me'. There have been people who were on the plane denying the majority of it happened.



Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: Garden Goblin on June 28, 2012, 09:07:26 PM
After a very sharp "I said I'm not interested" how many men would go on in the close confines of a plane?

Unfortunately, entirely too many.  Maybe not continue flirting, but then go on for an hour about what a b**** you are.  Easier sometimes to continue some light disinterested flirting than to deal with the behavior some guys exude when you fail to recognize what an awesome catch they are   ::)
Title: Re: Celebrity Cheater Outed Via Twitter
Post by: mbbored on July 08, 2012, 05:17:03 PM
After a very sharp "I said I'm not interested" how many men would go on in the close confines of a plane?

Unfortunately, entirely too many.  Maybe not continue flirting, but then go on for an hour about what a b**** you are.  Easier sometimes to continue some light disinterested flirting than to deal with the behavior some guys exude when you fail to recognize what an awesome catch they are   ::)

I flew for work last week and thought of this situation. You see, before we took off, the guy beside me, also dressed for business and carrying a briefcase, started talking about himself. I replied that's nice, but I have work to do. I pull out some papers and start reading, and he kept talking. When I was allowed to use my electronics, I got out my laptop to work on spreadsheets, and he continued talking at me for the next two hours. TWO HOURS. He was trying to convince me that he was really, really awesome. He did neglect to tell me whether or not his wife was equally awesome, even though he was wearing a wedding ring. For the record, after I told him I needed to work, I didn't say a single word to him. Those two hours were a complete monologue.

When we got off the plane, my boss, who was seated behind me, caught up to me and apologized on behalf of being a man.