Etiquette Hell

General Etiquette => Etiquette of the Rich and Famous => Topic started by: Arianoor on July 30, 2012, 04:44:55 PM

Title: Dirty Laundry
Post by: Arianoor on July 30, 2012, 04:44:55 PM
So, I've been out of touch with the flu for the last week and I came back to the world today to find that the worst thing ever has occurred!  *Heavy, heavy, heavy sarcasm*  Kristen Stewart has cheated on Robert Pattinson and they have broken up!   :'(

Now, here's the rude part, IMO, she releases this statement about how her "momentary indiscretion (that apparently lasted months)" has harmed her favorite person and how she loves him, loves him, loves him . . . blah blah blah.  Now, I know that it is de rigueur for celebrities to do this sort of thing for damage control, but did she really need to go into that kind of detail?  Wouldn't something like, "I have made a terrible mistake, which I regret bitterly," *full stop* have been a more polite option?  Telling someone that you are sorry you cheated on them and love them, love them, love them, doesn't seem like something you should splash across US Weekly.

Airing dirty laundry is rude, right?

ETA: Changed the title.  No mod response, but multiple people disagreed with it, so I stand corrected.   :D 
Title: Re: Tramp-ire Dirty Laundry
Post by: Venus193 on July 30, 2012, 05:00:10 PM
Rude, but sadly fashionable.
Title: Re: Tramp-ire Dirty Laundry
Post by: Judah on July 30, 2012, 05:07:12 PM
Airing dirty laundry is rude, right?


Since when has that stopped anyone?  The thing is that regular, ordinary people do this everyday; it's just that they're not famous, so it's not splashed all over the tabloids. 
Title: Re: Tramp-ire Dirty Laundry
Post by: thedudeabides on July 30, 2012, 05:07:59 PM
It's cool to call someone a tramp here?
Title: Re: Tramp-ire Dirty Laundry
Post by: Arianoor on July 30, 2012, 05:17:09 PM
It's cool to call someone a tramp here?

I was actually quoting an article.  Sorry, should have made that clear.
Title: Re: "Tramp-ire" Dirty Laundry
Post by: Jones on July 30, 2012, 05:19:06 PM
Once the laundry is aired, by gossips or papparazzi or whatever, the only thing the target can then do is come out with an apology. That, or be silent on the whole thing and let the gossips/magazine writers say whatever they want.
Title: Re: Tramp-ire Dirty Laundry
Post by: thedudeabides on July 30, 2012, 05:31:20 PM
It's cool to call someone a tramp here?

I was actually quoting an article.  Sorry, should have made that clear.

Yeah... Although I actually don't think that makes it any more appropriate for a site like this, but okay.

As for the etiquette of publicly apologizing for cheating on someone, I've realized I just don't care.  If she'd just said she was sorry, someone would be on her for not being sorry enough; she said more than that, so people are criticizing her for not just apologizing and being done.  There wasn't a way to win, and honestly the person whose opinion really matters in this situation is the person who was cheated on.
Title: Re: Tramp-ire Dirty Laundry
Post by: Arianoor on July 30, 2012, 05:38:11 PM
It's cool to call someone a tramp here?

I was actually quoting an article.  Sorry, should have made that clear.

Yeah... Although I actually don't think that makes it any more appropriate for a site like this, but okay.


I disagree and think it's funny and ironic.  However, I have reported myself to the mods to ask.

Quote
As for the etiquette of publicly apologizing for cheating on someone, I've realized I just don't care.  If she'd just said she was sorry, someone would be on her for not being sorry enough; she said more than that, so people are criticizing her for not just apologizing and being done.  There wasn't a way to win, and honestly the person whose opinion really matters in this situation is the person who was cheated on.

There may not be a way to "win" with the public.  But, I still believe that it is rude to publish details of someone else's life, which is what she is doing.  She may not be able to help that the pictures were put out there, but she can help making public something that should be a private communication.


Edited to fixed quoting mishap.
Title: Re: "Tramp-ire" Dirty Laundry
Post by: Amava on July 30, 2012, 05:47:17 PM
I think it is inappropriate to discuss other people's private lives, whether they are celebrities or not.

In my ideal world, the media would not be talking about this at all. 

Each time I see something like this mentioned on the internet or in a newspaper as if it is "news", I raise an eyebrow and think: "Why is this supposed to be interesting?"

I guess I just don't get it. 

But in the not-so-ideal world we live in, from the point of view of a celebrity... whether to make statements about their private lives or not? Damned if they do, damned if they don't, I suppose. I certainly have the most respect for those who don't. For those who do,well, I try to avoid reading about it. And if I do come across a story, I a. don't care and b. take everything the media says with a pound of salt.
Title: Re: "Tramp-ire" Dirty Laundry
Post by: Sharnita on July 30, 2012, 06:26:40 PM
I am not impressed with cheaters but I have  to say that I think an effusive public apology is better than effusive public bragging about how cheating has led to making you happier than ever before. A lot of stars do that.
Title: Re: "Tramp-ire" Dirty Laundry
Post by: shadowfox79 on July 31, 2012, 05:57:21 AM
Sadly, this is the sort of thing that's expected these days, although personally I don't much care.

She needs to be effusive, I imagine, because not only has she cheated on Robert Pattinson (as a million young girls faint) but she's caused pain to her director's wife and children. (As has he, of course, and I gather he also posted a suitably contrite statement.) So she's probably been told to sound as apologetic as possible.
Title: Re: "Tramp-ire" Dirty Laundry
Post by: BeagleMommy on July 31, 2012, 07:35:34 AM
I just wish she'd go away.  I don't think her apology sounded sincere.  "Methinks the lady doth protest too much"
Title: Re: "Tramp-ire" Dirty Laundry
Post by: Shopaholic on July 31, 2012, 07:42:52 AM
I think it is inappropriate to discuss other people's private lives, whether they are celebrities or not.


Seeing as many celebrites use their private lives for PR (which gets them jobs, which gets them money), I don't. They put it out there for the world to discuss, they can't complain when the world discusses unfavorably.

I just wish she'd go away.  I don't think her apology sounded sincere.  "Methinks the lady doth protest too much"

ITA.
Title: Re: "Tramp-ire" Dirty Laundry
Post by: Fleur on July 31, 2012, 08:02:27 AM
I think it is inappropriate to discuss other people's private lives, whether they are celebrities or not.


Seeing as many celebrites use their private lives for PR (which gets them jobs, which gets them money), I don't. They put it out there for the world to discuss, they can't complain when the world discusses unfavorably.

I just wish she'd go away.  I don't think her apology sounded sincere.  "Methinks the lady doth protest too much"

ITA.

I agree as well. I also have to admit that I looked at the so called scandalous pictures, and I've never seen anything look more staged. I strongly suspect that there is no affair at all and that the whole thing was put on to bring the Pattinson/Stewart showmance to a convincing end while at the same time drumming up custom for Snow White and The Huntsman 2. If this 'scandal' doesn't boost ticket sales, then I will eat any item of headgear.
Title: Re: Tramp-ire Dirty Laundry
Post by: nyarlathotep on July 31, 2012, 08:06:03 AM
It's cool to call someone a tramp here?
I was actually quoting an article.  Sorry, should have made that clear.
Yeah... Although I actually don't think that makes it any more appropriate for a site like this, but okay.
I disagree and think it's funny and ironic.  However, I have reported myself to the mods to ask.
Sorry, but I have to agree with thedudeabides. Not an appropriate term to use.
Title: Re: Tramp-ire Dirty Laundry
Post by: Scuba_Dog on July 31, 2012, 08:10:59 AM
It's cool to call someone a tramp here?
I was actually quoting an article.  Sorry, should have made that clear.
Yeah... Although I actually don't think that makes it any more appropriate for a site like this, but okay.
I disagree and think it's funny and ironic.  However, I have reported myself to the mods to ask.
Sorry, but I have to agree with thedudeabides. Not an appropriate term to use.

Adding my POD to that.  I think it's very childish and distasteful - especially for an etiquette site.  (OP, I know you only quoted the article)
Title: Re: "Tramp-ire" Dirty Laundry
Post by: Twik on July 31, 2012, 08:27:13 AM
Actually, I feel a little sorry for her. She's very young, in a society (Hollywood) that preaches "if it feels good, do it!". Self-denial in the interest of long-term happiness is not a virtue taught there. So, she's learning for the first time that actions have consequences.

I'm even sorrier for Pattison, and his career. It's unfortunate, but I think he'll be tarred as "the man who couldn't keep Kristen Stewart satisfied," and that will hurt his leading man credibility.
Title: Re: "Tramp-ire" Dirty Laundry
Post by: Piratelvr1121 on July 31, 2012, 08:31:09 AM
How would you tell if she's satisfied or not? The girl has like two expressions, if that.
Title: Re: "Tramp-ire" Dirty Laundry
Post by: Scuba_Dog on July 31, 2012, 08:40:41 AM
Actually, I feel a little sorry for her. She's very young, in a society (Hollywood) that preaches "if it feels good, do it!". Self-denial in the interest of long-term happiness is not a virtue taught there. So, she's learning for the first time that actions have consequences.

I'm even sorrier for Pattison, and his career. It's unfortunate, but I think he'll be tarred as "the man who couldn't keep Kristen Stewart satisfied," and that will hurt his leading man credibility.

As far as the entire story is concerned - Twik summed up how I feel about it. 

Honestly, all of the "fans" seem to be having too much "fun" with this whole thing.  It's pathetic.
Title: Re: Tramp-ire Dirty Laundry
Post by: Winterlight on July 31, 2012, 08:51:05 AM
It's cool to call someone a tramp here?

I was actually quoting an article.  Sorry, should have made that clear.

Yeah... Although I actually don't think that makes it any more appropriate for a site like this, but okay.

As for the etiquette of publicly apologizing for cheating on someone, I've realized I just don't care.  If she'd just said she was sorry, someone would be on her for not being sorry enough; she said more than that, so people are criticizing her for not just apologizing and being done.  There wasn't a way to win, and honestly the person whose opinion really matters in this situation is the person who was cheated on.

All of this. I don't think there was a "good" option. I think she should now refrain from making more public statements, but if she hadn't said anything she'd be trashed for that too.
Title: Re: "Tramp-ire" Dirty Laundry
Post by: Miss Misery on July 31, 2012, 09:40:57 AM


Now, here's the rude part, IMO, she releases this statement about how her "momentary indiscretion (that apparently lasted months)" has harmed her favorite person and how she loves him, loves him, loves him . . . blah blah blah.


Translation: She's "sorry" she got caught.
Title: Re: Tramp-ire Dirty Laundry
Post by: Arianoor on July 31, 2012, 10:52:31 AM
It's cool to call someone a tramp here?

I was actually quoting an article.  Sorry, should have made that clear.

Yeah... Although I actually don't think that makes it any more appropriate for a site like this, but okay.

As for the etiquette of publicly apologizing for cheating on someone, I've realized I just don't care.  If she'd just said she was sorry, someone would be on her for not being sorry enough; she said more than that, so people are criticizing her for not just apologizing and being done.  There wasn't a way to win, and honestly the person whose opinion really matters in this situation is the person who was cheated on.

All of this. I don't think there was a "good" option. I think she should now refrain from making more public statements, but if she hadn't said anything she'd be trashed for that too.

I still think that a simple, "I have made a terrible mistake and am terribly sorry," would suffice in the apology department.  Going on and on is just so distasteful in my opinion, she hurt him enough (unless the whole thing was staged as another poster theorized) without making a giant circus of her grief and utter dejection.  I don't follow celebrity culture as a rule, in fact I'm hopelessly behind most of the time, but haven't cheaters in the past gone the route the simple apology-and-please-respect-the-privacy-of-the-injured-party?  Of course, as Twik said, she is terribly young, perhaps the publicist is more to blame.

The other thing is, as far as etiquette, celebrities are people too and should have to follow the rules that everyone else does.  If it would be rude for me to stand up in church/work/school and make that announcement, then it is rude for her to do it, too.  Of course, it would be rude for me to even give the simple apology that I have been advocating, so I guess I'll have to change my tune!
Title: Re: Dirty Laundry
Post by: nyarlathotep on July 31, 2012, 11:09:09 AM
ETA: Changed the title.  No mod response, but multiple people disagreed with it, so I stand corrected.   :D

BBelle, that was highly considerate and graceful. Thank you!
Title: Re: "Tramp-ire" Dirty Laundry
Post by: RingTailedLemur on July 31, 2012, 11:29:35 AM
I think it is inappropriate to discuss other people's private lives, whether they are celebrities or not.


Seeing as many celebrites use their private lives for PR (which gets them jobs, which gets them money), I don't. They put it out there for the world to discuss, they can't complain when the world discusses unfavorably.

I just wish she'd go away.  I don't think her apology sounded sincere.  "Methinks the lady doth protest too much"

ITA.

I agree as well. I also have to admit that I looked at the so called scandalous pictures, and I've never seen anything look more staged. I strongly suspect that there is no affair at all and that the whole thing was put on to bring the Pattisnon/Stewart showmance to a convincing end while at the same time drumming up custom for SWANTH 2. If this 'scandal' doesn't boost ticket sales, then I will eat any item of headgear.

SWANTH 2?
Title: Re: "Tramp-ire" Dirty Laundry
Post by: Arianoor on July 31, 2012, 11:32:50 AM
I think it is inappropriate to discuss other people's private lives, whether they are celebrities or not.


Seeing as many celebrites use their private lives for PR (which gets them jobs, which gets them money), I don't. They put it out there for the world to discuss, they can't complain when the world discusses unfavorably.

I just wish she'd go away.  I don't think her apology sounded sincere.  "Methinks the lady doth protest too much"

ITA.

I agree as well. I also have to admit that I looked at the so called scandalous pictures, and I've never seen anything look more staged. I strongly suspect that there is no affair at all and that the whole thing was put on to bring the Pattisnon/Stewart showmance to a convincing end while at the same time drumming up custom for SWANTH 2. If this 'scandal' doesn't boost ticket sales, then I will eat any item of headgear.

SWANTH 2?
Snow White and the Huntsman II

It took me a few minutes, but I got it!  I think that the N is an extra.
Title: Re: "Tramp-ire" Dirty Laundry
Post by: Amava on July 31, 2012, 11:39:02 AM
I think it is inappropriate to discuss other people's private lives, whether they are celebrities or not.


Seeing as many celebrites use their private lives for PR (which gets them jobs, which gets them money), I don't. They put it out there for the world to discuss, they can't complain when the world discusses unfavorably.

Whether they "can complain" or not, was not really my point.
What I'm saying is that it is tacky all around: the celebrities who make their dirty laundry an attraction, the "journalists" who plaster it all over the media, and the public that buys into it and discusses it.

I am still waiting for someone to explain to me *why* the public takes such an interest in the private life of celebrities and *why* it sells. Like I said, I don't *get* it. 

Then again, I don't get most sports either, so it might just be me.  ;D
Title: Re: Dirty Laundry
Post by: Calypso on July 31, 2012, 11:39:26 AM
I have no opinion whatsoever on this story, but as someone who loves the English language in all its awesome and wacky permutations, may I just thank you for two great new words, "trampire" and "showmance"? (maybe not new to you, but I hadn't heard them before).

So delicious. I must find a way to use them today. ;D Shakespeare would've been able to do it, methinks.
Title: Re: "Tramp-ire" Dirty Laundry
Post by: Fleur on July 31, 2012, 11:45:18 AM
I think it is inappropriate to discuss other people's private lives, whether they are celebrities or not.


Seeing as many celebrites use their private lives for PR (which gets them jobs, which gets them money), I don't. They put it out there for the world to discuss, they can't complain when the world discusses unfavorably.

I just wish she'd go away.  I don't think her apology sounded sincere.  "Methinks the lady doth protest too much"

ITA.

I agree as well. I also have to admit that I looked at the so called scandalous pictures, and I've never seen anything look more staged. I strongly suspect that there is no affair at all and that the whole thing was put on to bring the Pattisnon/Stewart showmance to a convincing end while at the same time drumming up custom for SWANTH 2. If this 'scandal' doesn't boost ticket sales, then I will eat any item of headgear.

SWANTH 2?
Snow White and the Huntsman II

It took me a few minutes, but I got it!  I think that the N is an extra.

Yes, you're right. On both counts, I'll go back and edit to make it clearer.
Title: Re: "Tramp-ire" Dirty Laundry
Post by: StuffedGrapeLeaves on July 31, 2012, 12:19:18 PM
Actually, I feel a little sorry for her. She's very young, in a society (Hollywood) that preaches "if it feels good, do it!". Self-denial in the interest of long-term happiness is not a virtue taught there. So, she's learning for the first time that actions have consequences.

I agree with Twik on this part.  She is learning her lessons is a very public way.  I also don't think she can win - she will be publicly trashed no matter what she does. 
Title: Re: "Tramp-ire" Dirty Laundry
Post by: Twik on July 31, 2012, 12:56:42 PM
I agree as well. I also have to admit that I looked at the so called scandalous pictures, and I've never seen anything look more staged. I strongly suspect that there is no affair at all and that the whole thing was put on to bring the Pattinson/Stewart showmance to a convincing end while at the same time drumming up custom for Snow White and The Huntsman 2. If this 'scandal' doesn't boost ticket sales, then I will eat any item of headgear.

Considering that the director is married, with three small children, this would make him quite something of a monster.

"Don't cry, darling, Daddy isn't REALLY going to leave Mommy for that other girl. It's just for the papers, see? And it'll make Daddy a lot of money, and he'll buy you a new pony."
Title: Re: "Tramp-ire" Dirty Laundry
Post by: Fleur on July 31, 2012, 02:20:00 PM
I agree as well. I also have to admit that I looked at the so called scandalous pictures, and I've never seen anything look more staged. I strongly suspect that there is no affair at all and that the whole thing was put on to bring the Pattinson/Stewart showmance to a convincing end while at the same time drumming up custom for Snow White and The Huntsman 2. If this 'scandal' doesn't boost ticket sales, then I will eat any item of headgear.

Considering that the director is married, with three small children, this would make him quite something of a monster.

"Don't cry, darling, Daddy isn't REALLY going to leave Mommy for that other girl. It's just for the papers, see? And it'll make Daddy a lot of money, and he'll buy you a new pony."

Oh, I totally agree. Plus I know that my theory sounds a bit tinfoil hat: however, from looking at the pictures, the way the two of them look out for paps screams 'look at us' rather than 'gee, hope nobody can see us'. I also just can't believe that they would be so naive as to go so far in a public spot. Something just doesn't add up with the whole 'caught in the tide of passion' story that is being built up. Plus, it is said that Liberty Ross has already forgiven him, which would fit in with the whole thing being fake.
Title: Re: "Tramp-ire" Dirty Laundry
Post by: Redneck Gravy on July 31, 2012, 02:29:00 PM
Actually, I feel a little sorry for her. She's very young, in a society (Hollywood) that preaches "if it feels good, do it!". Self-denial in the interest of long-term happiness is not a virtue taught there. So, she's learning for the first time that actions have consequences.

I agree with Twik on this part.  She is learning her lessons is a very public way.  I also don't think she can win - she will be publicly trashed no matter what she does.

I completely disagree - what did Elizabeth Taylor learn from her very public affair with Debbie Reynolds' husband?  That if you are beautiful/rich enough you get a pass? 

I could name others, but why bother, Hollywood is a place of mystical morals.   

I don't expect Kristin to be publicly trashed (for long anyway).

Title: Re: "Tramp-ire" Dirty Laundry
Post by: Shopaholic on July 31, 2012, 04:03:29 PM

Whether they "can complain" or not, was not really my point.
What I'm saying is that it is tacky all around: the celebrities who make their dirty laundry an attraction, the "journalists" who plaster it all over the media, and the public that buys into it and discusses it.

I am still waiting for someone to explain to me *why* the public takes such an interest in the private life of celebrities and *why* it sells. Like I said, I don't *get* it. 

Then again, I don't get most sports either, so it might just be me.  ;D

I think it's a viscuous circle with all three parties benefiting. The celebs get PR, the journalists get paid and the consuming public gets a break from reality.
Once the public will lose interest, the industry will dry out. However, human nature being what it is the chances of that happening are slim to none.
Why are we so interested in celebs? Because they're living our fantasy, at least to us outsiders. They get paid a lot of money to jet-set around the world, wear beautiful clothes and go to parties. Their line of work seems infinitely more glamorous than ours, and they look good doing it.

Now, there are people who are genuinely talented, or have a very interesting life or line of work - so we would like to know more about them. On the other hand, you have people like the Kardashians who are famous for being famous... I don't get humans, either.
Title: Re: Dirty Laundry
Post by: WillyNilly on July 31, 2012, 04:46:56 PM
My problem is that she didn't actually apologize, or focus at all on hurting anyone else, just went on about herself.  I love him, I love him, I love him, the person I love the most, etc, etc.  How about I'm so sorry for the hurt I caused.  How about I'm sorry for the trouble I've caused.  How about thinking about someone other then yourself - because to me all those I love hims, weren't about hurting him, but about how she hurt herself, how she feels bad for herself that her boyfriend kicked her out, how she messed up her life.
Title: Re: Dirty Laundry
Post by: C0mputerGeek on July 31, 2012, 11:01:34 PM
Disclaimer: I work in the Entertainment Industry. I am on the IT (Information Technology) side, but I do keep up to date with productions and castings and other trends because it's part of my job.

1. I actually don't think the affair was something appropriate to be reported on. "Robsten" have been fairly low key about their relationship. For the longest time, they denied that they were even a couple.

2. Once a celebrity has been caught been doing something untoward, standard PR practice is to have them make the rounds on the media circuit and apologize. Think: Hugh Grant doing interviews when he was caught with the prostitute. His round of mea culpas is the rule, not the exception and is considered a standard on what to do if you're famous and caught being bad.

The only exception I can think of for #2 is when it's a rather heinous unsubstantiated rumor (Example: Denise Richards meeting Charlie Sheen because she was one of Heidi's girls) that has not been reported by mainstream media. In that case, the celebrity should not engage.

3. As for this being part of a planned media blitz, I highly doubt it. Twihards will support the last installment of the Twilight movie franchise regardless. The only thing this would effect would be the number of death threats Kristen Stewart receives from crazed fans for daring to date Rob. Snow White and the Huntsman is practically gone from the theaters, and any decisions on Snow White and the Huntsman II will be made on international ticket sales, domestic movie sales, and DVD sales.

If I were to judge the "rudeness" I not say it's from Kristen Stewart but from the magazine that reported the issue in the first place.
Title: Re: Dirty Laundry
Post by: Twik on August 01, 2012, 09:22:01 AM
I'd disagree on one point - I think it is rude to publicly engage in infidelity, knowing that your partner will be hurt and humiliated when (and it's when, not if, in such cases) they find out.

I agree that the magazine was rude, in the terms of the regular world, for reporting on a private situation. However, this type of publication is part of the machinery that drives the entertainment industry these days, and generates those multi-million dollar profits. Gossip fills the coffers.

Perhaps it would have been best for all of us, back in the early days of the film industry, if they'd followed the tenets of the early producers who refused to name their stars - Mary Pickford was "The Biograph Girl", to her early fans, not a "name". But actors (and directors) have benefited financially from becoming celebrities. I'm not sure Stewart would give up her considerable earnings to be just an ordinary 22 year old girl in a love triangle. It's a case of live by the (fame) sword, die by the sword.
Title: Re: Dirty Laundry
Post by: C0mputerGeek on August 01, 2012, 01:08:41 PM
I'd disagree on one point - I think it is rude to publicly engage in infidelity, knowing that your partner will be hurt and humiliated when (and it's when, not if, in such cases) they find out.

I agree with you on the act of infidelity itself being inappropriate, but rude doesn't really seem like a good word to describe breaking a committed, monogamous relationship. It's not expansive enough, if that makes sense.

Point of clarification: Florence Lawrence was the first actress associated with the moniker "The Biograph Graph Girl."

Florence was the one who pushed to be known by her name so she could demand a higher wage. I agree that this can be considered the start of the celebrity culture and people being obsessed with stars. However, it should be noted that people were truly interested in Florence long before she became known by her name; fans would write the studio and ask who The Biograph Graph Girl was.

Having said that, all actors are not celebrities. Many stars - see Jodie Foster - manage to score plum roles and still remain under the radar.

There are actors that do invite the public into their private life. For those that don't, I think the media should respect their privacy.
Title: Re: Dirty Laundry
Post by: Venus193 on August 01, 2012, 07:25:57 PM
The culture of celebrity has always been with us.  People would head to the ampitheatre in Ancient Rome when Mnester was starring in something, people crowded the King's Theatre in Haymarket in the 18th century to hear Farinelli, and Franz Liszt had groupies.

The only thing those guys didn't have is electronic media to spread the word of their successes -- and their pecadillos -- in a New York minute.
Title: Re: Dirty Laundry
Post by: Twik on August 02, 2012, 09:02:37 AM
I'd disagree on one point - I think it is rude to publicly engage in infidelity, knowing that your partner will be hurt and humiliated when (and it's when, not if, in such cases) they find out.

I agree with you on the act of infidelity itself being inappropriate, but rude doesn't really seem like a good word to describe breaking a committed, monogamous relationship. It's not expansive enough, if that makes sense.


Well, there is a good point that adultery goes beyond rude, into moral issues. However, I think that adultery can at least be carried out discretely. Doing it in such a way that "everyone knows your business" - if deliberate, it's cruel, if done simply out of carelessness, I'd call it, among other things, rude to one's partner.

And may I say that one reason I love e-Hell is that I can be corrected about Mary Pickford vs. Florence Lawrence?  ;D
Title: Re: Dirty Laundry
Post by: Arianoor on August 02, 2012, 10:09:21 AM
I'd disagree on one point - I think it is rude to publicly engage in infidelity, knowing that your partner will be hurt and humiliated when (and it's when, not if, in such cases) they find out.

I agree with you on the act of infidelity itself being inappropriate, but rude doesn't really seem like a good word to describe breaking a committed, monogamous relationship. It's not expansive enough, if that makes sense.


Well, there is a good point that adultery goes beyond rude, into moral issues. However, I think that adultery can at least be carried out discretely. Doing it in such a way that "everyone knows your business" - if deliberate, it's cruel, if done simply out of carelessness, I'd call it, among other things, rude to one's partner.

I completely agree.  Many issues have a moral imperative, but they also have the side that involves people interacting with other people, that is where rudeness can come in to it.

Title: Re: Dirty Laundry
Post by: C0mputerGeek on August 02, 2012, 11:23:57 PM
However, I think that adultery can at least be carried out discretely. Doing it in such a way that "everyone knows your business" - if deliberate, it's cruel, if done simply out of carelessness, I'd call it, among other things, rude to one's partner.
I completely agree. I think if someone is going to cheat, the very least they can do is be discrete. Eddie Cibrian and Leann Rimes were so public about their affair.

And may I say that one reason I love e-Hell is that I can be corrected about Mary Pickford vs. Florence Lawrence?  ;D
..and here about Mnester in Ancient Rome on the same page. It is great!
Title: Re: Dirty Laundry
Post by: Allyson on August 05, 2012, 11:38:28 AM
I feel like once something like this happens, everyone tears apart the 'apology' and says it doesn't sound sincere, they should've used this word instead of that word, and there's pretty much no magic phrase that will ever make people go 'oh they are really sorry'! A lot of people just want to get righteous about these things no matter what, and Stewart particularly attracts a ton of hate even before this. 
Title: Re: Dirty Laundry
Post by: MissRose on August 06, 2012, 07:53:25 AM
The days are bygone where celebs could have their indiscretions and not have them splashed all over the mass media (at least not at the speeds of today even if some of them were published).  These days with the internet and social media, things can get spread quickly.  Can you imagine how people would have reacted if Liz Taylor and Richard Burton's news of their affair was spread via twitter?

Those who cheat on a significant other, can say "sorry" all they want in the media.  Most of them may not even think ahead of time of the implications a day or night of passion (or more) can cause issues in their personal and/or professional lives.
Title: Re: Dirty Laundry
Post by: nolechica on August 09, 2012, 02:34:58 AM
The days are bygone where celebs could have their indiscretions and not have them splashed all over the mass media (at least not at the speeds of today even if some of them were published).  These days with the internet and social media, things can get spread quickly.  Can you imagine how people would have reacted if Liz Taylor and Richard Burton's news of their affair was spread via twitter?

Those who cheat on a significant other, can say "sorry" all they want in the media.  Most of them may not even think ahead of time of the implications a day or night of passion (or more) can cause issues in their personal and/or professional lives.

Yep and fans vary in how willing they are to help a celeb out when the story breaks, regardless of the discretion.  Twihards probably haven't dealt with any real drama or they'd know not to make things worse.
Title: Re: Dirty Laundry
Post by: Piratelvr1121 on August 09, 2012, 07:22:34 AM
I had to laugh at Will Farrell's appearance on Conan when I saw it.
Title: Re: "Tramp-ire" Dirty Laundry
Post by: ydpubs on August 09, 2012, 11:39:23 AM
I am not impressed with cheaters but I have  to say that I think an effusive public apology is better than effusive public bragging about how cheating has led to making you happier than ever before. A lot of stars do that.

*cough*Brangelina*cough*
Title: Re: Dirty Laundry
Post by: Cosmasia on August 09, 2012, 05:37:37 PM
I hate cheaters, to be blunt. But I don't think there's anything wrong with being publicly happy with your new relationship, as "Brangelina" for example. At some point life goes on.

As for the topic I think it's fine to issue an apology. I don't think it's tacky but I also don't think it's necessary.
I think people need to deal with these things in whatever way works for them. :)
Title: Re: Dirty Laundry
Post by: katycoo on August 10, 2012, 01:40:57 AM
I think her statement was appropriate.  The news was outed by media, and if its being discussed in public, I believe she's entitled to make a one-off address.  Perhaps t could have been concise but its also a PR move - too concise would have left no opening for people to think her anything more than heartless.  As it is, she'll have a rough few months.  After that - wait and see.

I can't decide if I think its a scam.  I actually always thought her relationship with Pattinson was a scam (or at the very least, that they wouldn't last the distance).
IF its a scam, I can't decide which scenario is worse.  That she and director decided to go along with this despite the impact on his family, or that he was in the dark, and she screwed the lot of them over :(
Title: Re: Dirty Laundry
Post by: Winterlight on August 10, 2012, 09:18:29 AM
I can't decide if I think its a scam.  I actually always thought her relationship with Pattinson was a scam (or at the very least, that they wouldn't last the distance).
IF its a scam, I can't decide which scenario is worse.  That she and director decided to go along with this despite the impact on his family, or that he was in the dark, and she screwed the lot of them over :(

Rupert Sanders is still responsible for his actions, whatever her motivations may or may not have been. He's the one who made the decision to get involved with her. He is the one who's married with children. And he is the one whose choices landed him on the front pages of the tabloid press.
Title: Re: Dirty Laundry
Post by: Fleur on August 10, 2012, 11:40:47 AM
I can't decide if I think its a scam.  I actually always thought her relationship with Pattinson was a scam (or at the very least, that they wouldn't last the distance).
IF its a scam, I can't decide which scenario is worse.  That she and director decided to go along with this despite the impact on his family, or that he was in the dark, and she screwed the lot of them over :(

Rupert Sanders is still responsible for his actions, whatever her motivations may or may not have been. He's the one who made the decision to get involved with her. He is the one who's married with children. And he is the one whose choices landed him on the front pages of the tabloid press.
I do think it is a scam, just based on how staged and stilted the pictures look. But I still 100% agree with this post: if it wasn't a scam, or was one just on her part, he still went along with it. If it is real, I find him more reprehenisble than her.
Title: Re: Dirty Laundry
Post by: Twik on August 10, 2012, 02:28:32 PM
I wonder if the "stilted" look is from her thinking, "Hmm, perhaps it's not a good idea getting my picture taken like this. But if I object, it'll look like I feel I'm doing something wrong. What to do? Act natural. And I don't have a script...."
Title: Re: Dirty Laundry
Post by: ydpubs on August 10, 2012, 03:04:55 PM
I hate cheaters, to be blunt. But I don't think there's anything wrong with being publicly happy with your new relationship, as "Brangelina" for example. At some point life goes on.

As for the topic I think it's fine to issue an apology. I don't think it's tacky but I also don't think it's necessary.
I think people need to deal with these things in whatever way works for them. :)

All I can say is, Pitt basically bashes Aniston and their marriage, then goes on in the same article gushing on and on about Jolie. (September 2011) He later backpedals and apologizes profusely.

Their emphatic statements about not committing adultery only to make total, contradictory statements in later interviews about how it all started on the set of Mr. & Mrs. Smith.

These two things combined I just find, classless, tacky, rude and insensitive. And for Jolie, who bashed and despised her father for his infidelity for years, the ultimate in hypocrisy.
Title: Re: Dirty Laundry
Post by: Sharnita on August 10, 2012, 04:32:04 PM
I hate cheaters, to be blunt. But I don't think there's anything wrong with being publicly happy with your new relationship, as "Brangelina" for example. At some point life goes on.

As for the topic I think it's fine to issue an apology. I don't think it's tacky but I also don't think it's necessary.
I think people need to deal with these things in whatever way works for them. :)

All I can say is, Pitt basically bashes Aniston and their marriage, then goes on in the same article gushing on and on about Jolie. (September 2011) He later backpedals and apologizes profusely.

Their emphatic statements about not committing adultery only to make total, contradictory statements in later interviews about how it all started on the set of Mr. & Mrs. Smith.

These two things combined I just find, classless, tacky, rude and insensitive. And for Jolie, who bashed and despised her father for his infidelity for years, the ultimate in hypocrisy.

They weren't even the people I was thinking of.  I think there are a lot of example of celebs who cheat and in the beginning of their new relationships gush about how they have never been this happy before.  I find it particularly unpleasant when the previous relationship included shared children.  I imagine that could be really confusing and hurtful for kids.
Title: Re: Dirty Laundry
Post by: katycoo on August 11, 2012, 03:07:35 AM
I can't decide if I think its a scam.  I actually always thought her relationship with Pattinson was a scam (or at the very least, that they wouldn't last the distance).
IF its a scam, I can't decide which scenario is worse.  That she and director decided to go along with this despite the impact on his family, or that he was in the dark, and she screwed the lot of them over :(

Rupert Sanders is still responsible for his actions, whatever her motivations may or may not have been. He's the one who made the decision to get involved with her. He is the one who's married with children. And he is the one whose choices landed him on the front pages of the tabloid press.

Oh absolutely!  Neither scenario excuses his behaviour. But if it was a genuine affair, they went into it equally. 
If it was a scam, and Kristen was the only one who knew, I think it makes her actions even more distasteful than if she merely hooked up with a married man.  If it was genuine, at least she had feelings for him, which is a very small something.
Title: Re: Dirty Laundry
Post by: Cosmasia on August 11, 2012, 08:37:19 AM
I hate cheaters, to be blunt. But I don't think there's anything wrong with being publicly happy with your new relationship, as "Brangelina" for example. At some point life goes on.

As for the topic I think it's fine to issue an apology. I don't think it's tacky but I also don't think it's necessary.
I think people need to deal with these things in whatever way works for them. :)

All I can say is, Pitt basically bashes Aniston and their marriage, then goes on in the same article gushing on and on about Jolie. (September 2011) He later backpedals and apologizes profusely.

Their emphatic statements about not committing adultery only to make total, contradictory statements in later interviews about how it all started on the set of Mr. & Mrs. Smith.

These two things combined I just find, classless, tacky, rude and insensitive. And for Jolie, who bashed and despised her father for his infidelity for years, the ultimate in hypocrisy.

I can see you and I definitely don't agree on this!  ;D