Etiquette Hell

General Etiquette => Family and Children => Topic started by: VltGrantham on December 03, 2012, 09:03:25 AM

Title: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: VltGrantham on December 03, 2012, 09:03:25 AM
We had dinner at my Mom's house on Saturday and in addition to our regular party (myself, DH, our DD, her, and my father--they are divorced) she invited an elderly neighbor, Ms. Brenda, who doesn't get out much.

I was seated next to Ms. Brenda and the meal was extremely stressful for both myself and DH.  She kept grilling us, but most especially me, all evening long.  I tried bean-dipping, I tried to pretend I hadn't heard her, I tried changing the subject--nothing worked.

To make matters worse, my Mom encouraged the problem by giving information we didn't particularly want shared.

For example:

Ms. Brenda (to me):  Are you going to have more children?
Me:  Oh no, I don't think so.
Her:  Why not?  Don't you want to give your mother some more grandchildren?
Mom:  Oh, they had some fertility issues so we're very grateful for the grandchild we do have.
Her:  What kind of fertility issues?

Thankfully, Mom remained silent on that subject and my DH spoke up and said "that's not really something we discuss with other people."

She asked me about our finances, whether DH or I ever argued about money, if we had known each other long before marriage, and at one point, whether DH had ever been tempted to cheat on me or did I worry about it when he was traveling.  (He travels a lot.)

DH reminded her that our DD was sitting at the table and that wasn't an appropriate topic of conversation in her presence.

Normally I would have shut it down quick or said something about how I found her questions to be invasive and personal.  However, since she's my elder, my Mother's guest, in my Mom's home--I tried using alternatives, but couldn't get my point across.  Typically we stay for coffee and dessert and I help my Mom clean up, but that night we left as soon as dinner was done.

Since the typical suggestions didn't work, what do you do in a situation like this?
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: Hmmmmm on December 03, 2012, 09:09:45 AM
Oh my.... what a busy body.  I was expecting closer to my aunt who grills people but it is not nearly to that extent. 

It doesn't matter that she was a guest of your Mother's.  You were too and have just as much right to an enjoyable experience as any other guest.  You would have been well within your right to shut her down or treat her questions as humor and laugh.  But I believe turnabout is fair play.  "My Miss Busybody, you've got a lot of questions.  How about you?  Did you cheat on your husband?  No, then he must have had a wandering eye.  How did you learn about it?  How many kids did you have.  Well that doesn't sound like nearly enough for your generation.  Why didn't you have more?"
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: Black Delphinium on December 03, 2012, 09:10:44 AM
I'm pretty cool with respecting my elders, but if they're being disrespectful to me, not so much.

Let people think me rude, I would have clammed up and my dinner would have been the most interesting thing in the world at that point.
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: RingTailedLemur on December 03, 2012, 09:13:06 AM
First I would have rubbed my chin, because it would have hurt after dropping onto the table so hard.

Normally I would have shut it down quick or said something about how I found her questions to be invasive and personal.

I'd have done this, or left much earlier than you did.  I am appalled at your mother's behaviour, too.


Quote
However, since she's my elder, my Mother's guest, in my Mom's home--I tried using alternatives, but couldn't get my point across. 

That wouldn't make any difference to me.  It's not rude to stand up for yourself because it can be done in a polite way.

I'd have said, "Brenda, your insistence on interrogating us on intimate details of our lives is intrusive and makes us very uncomfortable.  Please stop."
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: rose red on December 03, 2012, 09:15:14 AM
DH spoke up and said "that's not really something we discuss with other people."

I would just say that to each and every question.  For questions like cheating, I would say "That is completely inappropriate." and keep repeating it.

I don't care if she is older or your mother's guest.  You and your family are guests too and don't deserve to be grilled by another guest.
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: Shopaholic on December 03, 2012, 09:55:54 AM
DH spoke up and said "that's not really something we discuss with other people."

I would just say that to each and every question.  For questions like cheating, I would say "That is completely inappropriate." and keep repeating it.

I don't care if she is older or your mother's guest.  You and your family are guests too and don't deserve to be grilled by another guest.

I agree with this completely.
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: TurtleDove on December 03, 2012, 09:57:23 AM
I would say "That is completely inappropriate." and keep repeating it.

This.  Depending on your personality, try to make it a joke, as if the busybody could not possibly have seriously intended her question to be taken seriously or answered.  When this has happened to me, I don't get angry, I get amused (or at least I don't act angry, I act amused).  It has worked to shut people down because they can see their busybodiness doesn't get them answers and doesn't bother me because it is so absurd to me I think they are joking.
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: demarco on December 03, 2012, 09:58:58 AM
The same thing happened to my DH at Thanksgiving when an in-law three times removed grilled him relentlessly.  This is outrageous and there is no excuse for it.  I think that the questioners are counting on the fact that their targets want to keep the peace and don't want to embarrass anyone and so will answer the invasive, inappropriate questions. 

This is what I try to do when someone puts me on the spot this.  (I say "try" because a question ambush sometimes takes me by surprise and I forget about my stock response.)  I say, " why do you ask?"  It doesn't really matter what "the griller" says in response.  If he or she provides a reason for the question, I say nothing.  If he or she just gives me a look, I say nothing. If he or she issues a self pittying mumur, I say nothing.  If he or she persists with questions, I say nothing.  I do not believe this is rude.  Etiquette does not require that your life be an open book, especially to people you barely know. 

Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: MrTango on December 03, 2012, 10:15:30 AM
"What makes you think this is an appropriate topic for conversation?"

I personally take delight in watching someone squirm in uncomfortable silence while trying to come up with an answer to that question.  >:D
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: BeagleMommy on December 03, 2012, 10:20:35 AM
I think  a stock answer such as "That's personal" would work fine.  For the cheating question I would try "Why would you ask that?".  She was being inappropriate and you would not be rude to put her on the spot.

I would also be highly miffed at my mother for getting into the fertility issue.  I would have had to pull her aside and say "Mom, please don't discuss our fertility with anyone."
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: veryfluffy on December 03, 2012, 10:21:11 AM
she invited an elderly neighbor, Ms. Brenda, who doesn't get out much.

"So, Brenda, do you think there any particular reason that no one ever invites you out a second time?"
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: VltGrantham on December 03, 2012, 10:41:29 AM
Quote
I would have had to pull her aside and say "Mom, please don't discuss our fertility with anyone."

I told Mom yesterday that I knew she was trying to help, but that we normally don't discuss that with anyone outside the family.  (At least, at least not under the guise of the relative anonymity of the internet.)  She said she knew she shouldn't have said anything but was just trying to help, but promised she wouldn't again.

She also said she wouldn't be inviting Brenda anymore--at least not while we were there.  I don't think it would happen again, but I wanted to be prepared in the event I find myself in a similar situation.
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: weeblewobble on December 03, 2012, 11:04:38 AM
First I would have rubbed my chin, because it would have hurt after dropping onto the table so hard.

Normally I would have shut it down quick or said something about how I found her questions to be invasive and personal.

I'd have done this, or left much earlier than you did.  I am appalled at your mother's behaviour, too.


Quote
However, since she's my elder, my Mother's guest, in my Mom's home--I tried using alternatives, but couldn't get my point across. 

That wouldn't make any difference to me.  It's not rude to stand up for yourself because it can be done in a polite way.

I'd have said, "Brenda, your insistence on interrogating us on intimate details of our lives is intrusive and makes us very uncomfortable.  Please stop."

POD.  I think the concept of "respect your elders" goes out the window when those elders don't behave in a way that deserves respect.  I cannot believe she thought it was appropriate to discuss whether DH would cheat on you in front of your daughter!

ETA: Edited heavily after saw the response from your mom.
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: Zilla on December 03, 2012, 11:14:04 AM
It makes me wonder what your mother has told her in "confidence" and she thinks it's alright to ask you directly.  I would also have been highly uncomfortable and done what you have done.  I then would have sharp words with your mother and ask her why she felt it was alright to share that private information and if she has told neighbor anything.
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: VltGrantham on December 03, 2012, 11:34:38 AM
Quote
It makes me wonder what your mother has told her in "confidence" and she thinks it's alright to ask you directly.  I would also have been highly uncomfortable and done what you have done.  I then would have sharp words with your mother and ask her why she felt it was alright to share that private information and if she has told neighbor anything.

I don't want to accuse Mom because I've never had reason to believe that she shares really personal information with anyone.  I think what she did share, while irksome, was shared in an attempt to get Brenda to leave me alone.  She spoke quickly without thinking--I've done the same thing myself so I'm willing to cut her a little slack.

It's no secret DH travels alot and there is plenty of gossip and rumor in our small town anyway about our marriage.  DH's family has made it clear over the years that they think we will divorce (first it was in a year, then less than five, apparently now it's when DD is grown and out of the house) and that I supposedly married DH for his money.  Rumors have made it back to my parents, in particular my Mom who is not very socially active (unlike my Dad who is).

If she's heard anything (highly likely), it's probably more from DH's family, than Mom.
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: SamiHami on December 03, 2012, 11:50:25 AM
How about a shocked/dismayed look and "Why would you need to know such extremely personal information about us?"
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: GratefulMaria on December 03, 2012, 12:02:28 PM
Quote
It makes me wonder what your mother has told her in "confidence" and she thinks it's alright to ask you directly.  I would also have been highly uncomfortable and done what you have done.  I then would have sharp words with your mother and ask her why she felt it was alright to share that private information and if she has told neighbor anything.

I don't want to accuse Mom because I've never had reason to believe that she shares really personal information with anyone.  I think what she did share, while irksome, was shared in an attempt to get Brenda to leave me alone.  She spoke quickly without thinking--I've done the same thing myself so I'm willing to cut her a little slack.

It's no secret DH travels alot and there is plenty of gossip and rumor in our small town anyway about our marriage.  DH's family has made it clear over the years that they think we will divorce (first it was in a year, then less than five, apparently now it's when DD is grown and out of the house) and that I supposedly married DH for his money.  Rumors have made it back to my parents, in particular my Mom who is not very socially active (unlike my Dad who is).

If she's heard anything (highly likely), it's probably more from DH's family, than Mom.

Well, that adds a whole layer of not-nice.  I am so sorry.

DH and I tend to field intrusive questions like that with a cheerful, "Oh, we consider that private."  I've also said nothing, just let the silence build . . . under these circumstances, it is certainly not my problem to keep the conversation going.
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: O'Dell on December 03, 2012, 12:06:05 PM
I'm pretty cool with respecting my elders, but if they're being disrespectful to me, not so much.

Let people think me rude, I would have clammed up and my dinner would have been the most interesting thing in the world at that point.

I would have done something similar. Anyone or anything else at the table would have become fascinating, but Brenda would have gotten the cold shoulder.
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: Deetee on December 03, 2012, 12:13:35 PM
When someone is that outrageous, it can get easier (though maybe not at the first dinner-It's hard because you assume the other people are not jerks).

From now on, you are forewarned and can go with whatever approach serves you best.

1) Bean dip, nothing but bean dip.

Ms Nosy "So is your husband tempted to cheat when he travels so much?"
You *stare at her calmly and bemused, count to 5 in your head, turn away* "Mom, how is your garden this year?"


2) Attack

Ms Nosy "So is your husband tempted to cheat when he travels so much?"
You "What an odd question. Do you often cheat on your husband?"
(warning: some people just answer these questions"

Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: snowdragon on December 03, 2012, 12:24:50 PM
I would have told her that none of these things are her business and if she didn't back off I would have told her that She has no business prying in these areas of anyone's life, and I would not care about the fall out. 
   I don't answer invasive questions about such things no matter what the person's age and I don't believe that respecting your elders gives them license to pry into private areas of someone's life.
   I'd also recommend talking to your mom about how her friend treated you and that you should have been able to expect her to shut her friend down in your defense.
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: Zilla on December 03, 2012, 12:26:18 PM
Quote
It makes me wonder what your mother has told her in "confidence" and she thinks it's alright to ask you directly.  I would also have been highly uncomfortable and done what you have done.  I then would have sharp words with your mother and ask her why she felt it was alright to share that private information and if she has told neighbor anything.

I don't want to accuse Mom because I've never had reason to believe that she shares really personal information with anyone.  I think what she did share, while irksome, was shared in an attempt to get Brenda to leave me alone.  She spoke quickly without thinking--I've done the same thing myself so I'm willing to cut her a little slack.

It's no secret DH travels alot and there is plenty of gossip and rumor in our small town anyway about our marriage.  DH's family has made it clear over the years that they think we will divorce (first it was in a year, then less than five, apparently now it's when DD is grown and out of the house) and that I supposedly married DH for his money.  Rumors have made it back to my parents, in particular my Mom who is not very socially active (unlike my Dad who is).

If she's heard anything (highly likely), it's probably more from DH's family, than Mom.
Now knowing the backstory, I would have been a bit stiffer with her and looked at her incredously or remarked a bit much.
Such as to the more children, "We have a grown daughter out of our home and quite enjoying the peace. Why on earth would I disturb that?"  As for the money, "Excuse me, we don't discuss financial issues.  That is deeply personal." Cheating,  This would have just earned a point blank stare, "Again, very personal." and turn to husband or mom and talk of something else.  She sounds like an incredibly uncouth person to be around.  I would also decline future invites if she is included and telling your mom why if she asks.
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: bopper on December 03, 2012, 01:05:10 PM
To quote Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-Nev.) :


"That's a clown question, bro."


I believe he was quoting 19-year-old baseball phenom Bryce Harper, who said:

"I'm not going to answer that. That's a clown question, bro.

Either works in all awkward situations.
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: DaDancingPsych on December 03, 2012, 01:15:43 PM
Actually, when I read the OP, I thought that the DH had appropriate ways of handling the situation.

"That's not really something we discuss with other people."

DH reminded her that our DD was sitting at the table and that wasn't an appropriate topic of conversation in her presence.

It seems that he has knack for handling situations in an e-Hell approved manner. I would take his lead and even borrow his phrases (as well as the other great ones offered here.)
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: GSNW on December 03, 2012, 01:34:21 PM
WOW.  Others have all made outstanding suggestions.  I cannot believe the level of this woman's intrusive rudeness.  I would tell my mother that I will not be attending any dinner/event/etc in the future where this woman is present.  Not only are you not obligated to answer questions like that, you are not obligated to expose DD to this (I can't imagine what I would have thought of questions like this at a young age) regardless of how many bean-dipping and outright shut-down phrases you have at the ready.  It's my experience that people (no matter their age) that feel entitled to ask questions like this will rarely get the net and change their ways.
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: VorFemme on December 03, 2012, 01:39:37 PM
If you were Catholic, you could make a joke about discussing the answers to those questions with her after she was ordained and bound by the confessional.......but I get the impression that any "joke" would sail right over her head.  Grandpa was a preacher and asked those same questions of his children and grandchildren.....more often after his stroke than before (whatever busybody tendencies he had were greatly exaggerated after his health began to deteriorate).

If you are anywhere near the national capitol - I suppose you could try "that's classified" - but again, she probably wouldn't get that it was a joking reference to her getting way too nosy.....
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: BarensMom on December 03, 2012, 01:59:31 PM
I would also make it clear that Ms. Brenda is not to be in your daughter's presence when she is visiting her grandmother alone.  If this woman thinks those questions are appropriate for Thanksgiving dinner, what would she say to your daughter?
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: GSNW on December 03, 2012, 02:39:27 PM
I would also make it clear that Ms. Brenda is not to be in your daughter's presence when she is visiting her grandmother alone.  If this woman thinks those questions are appropriate for Thanksgiving dinner, what would she say to your daughter?

This this this.  Having personal questions asked is traumatic enough as an adult, moreso when a younger person doesn't necessarily have the coping skills to avoid/answer vaguely.  My dad had a friend that, when I was a teenager, would always ask me two questions:
1.  Are you dating anyone?
2.  If yes, is he a white boy?

I couldn't figure out why this mattered until my dad confessed to me that his pal was kind of (not kind of, I thought) racist.  My dad was pretty embarrassed about this and I didn't see much of this friend after I told my dad I thought his questions were asinine.
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: JeanFromBNA on December 03, 2012, 03:07:31 PM

DH spoke up and said "that's not really something we discuss with other people."


That's the policy policy, and it works very well for the topic at hand.  Obviously, it doesn't keep people from leaping to other NOYB questions, to which the answer is the same. 

If the grilling continues, I think it's fine to say, "Can we change the subject?  I don't feel that all of these personal questions are appropriate."

I think that "I beg your pardon!" is an appropriate response to such questioning.  Age has nothing to do with it.  She should know better.
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: kckgirl on December 03, 2012, 04:22:06 PM
Someone here once posted a stock answer to inappropriate or personal questions "It is the policy of the United States Navy to neither confirm nor deny the existence of nuclear weapons aboard its vessels."

The sentence had nothing to do with what was asked, but was a great distractor.
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: FauxFoodist on December 03, 2012, 04:39:09 PM
"What makes you think this is an appropriate topic for conversation?"

I personally take delight in watching someone squirm in uncomfortable silence while trying to come up with an answer to that question.  >:D

I would go with this.

I was grilled at a party earlier this year by DF's best friend's mother (BF and his wife were hosting the party).  I was so irritated by it that I looked over at DF, and he immediately asked me if I wanted to leave, which we did.  Fortunately, I didn't get the level of personal questions the OP did, but I was really put off by the interrogation, nonetheless (the woman also had the gall to tell DF she'd like to attend our wedding; I might've had a less then e-Hell appropriate response to that...but not AT DF, TO him, so it was okay).  I had just met her at that party and, afterwards, I did comment to DF that it's no wonder BF's wife can't stand her MIL.
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: Faerydust on December 03, 2012, 04:48:28 PM
Lately, my stock response to personal questions is "that's an interesting question, what makes you ask?" or instead of answering, I ask them the same question, if it applies, then once they answer I ask more questions so the focus is on them and they eventually forget about it.  ;)
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: LeveeWoman on December 03, 2012, 04:50:20 PM
I've asked "Why do you want to know?" of people who've asked intrusive questions.
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: Venus193 on December 03, 2012, 05:01:48 PM
Quote
POD. I think the concept of "respect your elders" goes out the window when those elders don't behave in a way that deserves respect. I cannot believe she thought it was appropriate to discuss whether DH would cheat on you in front of your daughter!

I'll take it a step further than that.  You are now an adult.  Whether this neighbor knew you as a child or not you have the absolute right to adult boundaries, including with your parents.  You do not need to tell them anything that is none of their business just because they are older than you are, or your parents' guest.

The other suggestions are excellent.  I personally would start with the raised eyebrow and "I beg your pardon" and escalate from there with anyone who doesn't get it.
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: nuit93 on December 03, 2012, 06:11:27 PM
she invited an elderly neighbor, Ms. Brenda, who doesn't get out much.

"So, Brenda, do you think there any particular reason that no one ever invites you out a second time?"

I like it :)
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: jedikaiti on December 03, 2012, 06:26:53 PM
Someone here once posted a stock answer to inappropriate or personal questions "It is the policy of the United States Navy to neither confirm nor deny the existence of nuclear weapons aboard its vessels."

The sentence had nothing to do with what was asked, but was a great distractor.

I have GOT to remember this!
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: sweetonsno on December 03, 2012, 07:17:51 PM
Someone here once posted a stock answer to inappropriate or personal questions "It is the policy of the United States Navy to neither confirm nor deny the existence of nuclear weapons aboard its vessels."

The sentence had nothing to do with what was asked, but was a great distractor.

I have GOT to remember this!

I also love this response.

As for this particular situation, I took a cue from the thread title and came up with, "If I wanted grilling at the table, I'd go for teppanyaki."
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: jane7166 on December 03, 2012, 08:19:19 PM
I would also make it clear that Ms. Brenda is not to be in your daughter's presence when she is visiting her grandmother alone.  If this woman thinks those questions are appropriate for Thanksgiving dinner, what would she say to your daughter?

Yes, exactly.  My mom did this to a friend of mine when we were teens.  Friend was over for dinner and Mom kept asking personal questions and Friend was answering vaguely and trying to be polite.  I finally said, "Does the prosecution rest?" to my mom, who looked surprised and then said, "Yes, the prosecution rests." 

I am surprised I didn't get in trouble for that one. 
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: LifeOnPluto on December 03, 2012, 08:34:50 PM
How appallingly rude! (Brenda, not you, OP). I wonder if she's somewhat senile, because I can't believe a rational person would behave that way.

I'd be tempted to give cheeky, silly answers. Eg:

Brenda: Has DH ever cheated on you whilst travelling for business?

You: Oh yes, he has a wife in every city. I'm actually Wife Number 23, for the record.

Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: doodlemor on December 03, 2012, 09:14:49 PM
..... I wonder if she's somewhat senile.....

Anything's possible.  However, I have known many older people, particularly women, who think that it is their deity given right to ask any question/say whatever they want.

If you are in a similar situation again, OP, I think that you can politely tell her to stop asking personal questions that don't concern her.  If she persists, I think that you should politely leave.

Your mother would be unhappy, but it would be a good example for DD.  You don't want to teach her that it is OK to let people bully her.
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: miranova on December 03, 2012, 09:39:40 PM
Our stock response when someone asks something too personal it's "that's classified information", said with a smile. 

Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: FauxFoodist on December 03, 2012, 11:36:13 PM
I was so shocked that it was happening and she was asking questions so rapidly that I didn't have time to recover.  The line of questioning I found super off-putting was asking me questions about my family members (I literally just met this woman like 5-10 minutes beforehand).  My family members?  Nowhere near here and only entered the conversation because the woman started interrogating me about them.  Fortunately, I am already rather private so I didn't answer her question.  I just repeated her question in a puzzled fashion and gave a non-answer and, I think, stated I found it a rather odd question.  Should I encounter here again, I'll be better prepared mentally to not answer her questions (I'd love to just tell her off, but the only place I'd encounter her is at her son's house so I can't).
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: VltGrantham on December 04, 2012, 08:43:33 AM
Thanks for the good advice everyone.  It is much appreciated!
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: bopper on December 04, 2012, 03:25:47 PM
Also, it may be that Miss Brenda is getting older and perhaps starting down the road to dementia or somesuch and is starting to lose her filter.  I would mention what happened to my mom and that it was not enjoyable.  The next time your mom invites you over, ask if Brenda is going to be there, and if she is, then tell your mom you would like to meet up with her another time.
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: Ms_Cellany on December 04, 2012, 03:41:18 PM
Someone here once posted a stock answer to inappropriate or personal questions "It is the policy of the United States Navy to neither confirm nor deny the existence of nuclear weapons aboard its vessels."

The sentence had nothing to do with what was asked, but was a great distractor.

I've used that one. It works like a charm!
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: jedikaiti on December 04, 2012, 04:19:04 PM
Someone here once posted a stock answer to inappropriate or personal questions "It is the policy of the United States Navy to neither confirm nor deny the existence of nuclear weapons aboard its vessels."

The sentence had nothing to do with what was asked, but was a great distractor.

I've used that one. It works like a charm!

I'm thinking a refusal to confirm or deny the existence of extraterrestrials on US soil could work very nicely, too.
Title: Re: Being grilled at the table.
Post by: Drawberry on December 04, 2012, 05:09:16 PM

Ms Nosy "So is your husband tempted to cheat when he travels so much?"
You "What an odd question. Do you often cheat on your husband?"
(warning: some people just answer these questions)

 >:D
That's almost evil. But sometimes people don't quite hear what comes out of their mouths and might need a 'turn around' in their direction to get the full impact.

On the topic of respecting elders:
I respect people who respect me. It does not matter to me if you have lived longer or shorter than myself, respect from me is earned with respect given. If no respect is given then none shall be dished out.