Etiquette Hell

General Etiquette => Life...in general => Topic started by: MOM21SON on February 01, 2013, 02:04:32 PM

Title: I got in line the wrong way.
Post by: MOM21SON on February 01, 2013, 02:04:32 PM
I was inline at the store today and there are two registers.  The registers are side by side and the way they are, the cashiers face out into the store.  There were 2 people ahead of me.  when the cashiers were finishing they were saying, "who's next?" and the next person would walk up.

When I was waiting to be next I saw someone pushing a cart to the far right, for lack of nothing else to do I glanced over and saw the very faint sign, that said, "line begins here."  So since both cashiers were finishing up, I just stayed.

"who's next?"  was called and the 2 guys in line the correct way gave me the go ahead.  So I did.

Cashier:  Were you next?
Me:  Yes, I was right behind that lady.
Cashier:  I had to ask because the line starts there and people are coming from all directions.
Me:  Sorry, I didn't see the sign.

The guy at the correct spot said, "she was next."

THEN, the other cashier yelled, "SHE WAS NEXT BUT HE IS IN THE CORRECT PLACE FOR A LINE.!"

I was so humiliated.

Did I really deserve such treatment?
Title: Re: I got in line the wrong way.
Post by: BeagleMommy on February 01, 2013, 02:10:23 PM
I think the cashier was rude for yelling.  That is completely uncalled for behavior.  The gentleman let you go, the cashier questioned it, he verified it; case closed.  No need for the attention-grabbing outburst.
Title: Re: I got in line the wrong way.
Post by: TootsNYC on February 01, 2013, 02:21:33 PM
The gentlemen obviously considered that you WERE "in line"--you just didn't know where the line was. "In line" is a metaphorical concept sometimes, and the cashier is too literal-minded to get it.

No, you didn't deserve that treatment, and if it's any consolation, those guys "behind" you "in line" assuredly thought the cashier was rude.

And she ruined their fun, bcs they were probably feeling very good about being so cooperative and community-minded with you. (bcs you waited for the go-ahead, they gave it, everybody feeling good all around--until the cashier yells! Party pooper!)
Title: Re: I got in line the wrong way.
Post by: Two Ravens on February 01, 2013, 02:26:45 PM
This humilated you? I can see it being awkward for a moment, but clearly everyone agreed that you were next. I'd do my best to shrug it off.
Title: Re: I got in line the wrong way.
Post by: MOM21SON on February 01, 2013, 02:39:52 PM
This humilated you? I can see it being awkward for a moment, but clearly everyone agreed that you were next. I'd do my best to shrug it off.


Yes it did.  It has been shrugged off, just asking a question.
Title: Re: I got in line the wrong way.
Post by: LeveeWoman on February 01, 2013, 02:45:22 PM
Crivens! What was her problem?
Title: Re: I got in line the wrong way.
Post by: Moray on February 01, 2013, 02:50:53 PM
This humilated you? I can see it being awkward for a moment, but clearly everyone agreed that you were next. I'd do my best to shrug it off.


Yes it did.  It has been shrugged off, just asking a question.

I generally reserve feelings of humiliation for inadvertent pantslessness in public :) Glad you got over it.

Of course you didn't deserve to be yelled at. You don't even have to ask to know that was wrong! Are you sure she was yelling at you and not calling out to the other cashier?
Title: Re: I got in line the wrong way.
Post by: lowspark on February 01, 2013, 03:42:00 PM
I think there are some cashiers who take a perverse pleasure in making people feel stupid if they don't stand in "the" line as marked. And those markings are not always obvious.

I once stood in what I thought was the line for a particular cashier at a round cashier station. The station was a circle (or an oval maybe) with registers all around so walking up to one of them seemed natural. While I stood there waiting for the cashier to ring up the customer in front of me, said cashier not only saw me, she acknowledged my presence with a nod. Then after the several minute wait, she proceeded to tell me that I had to get in line on the other side of the oval where there was apparently a sign indicating the "line starts here". Well, I have no idea if there were people there before I got in line or not but there were a couple of people there now. No way to know if I was line cutting or not at that point.

I'll never understand why she didn't just tell me as soon as she saw me where the line was. Since it was on the other side of the oval, it was certainly not obvious or intuitive at all. I was pretty miffed and considered leaving the merchandise and walking out but instead I just went to a different cashier station in another part of the store where there turned out to be no line.

I think it's great to have one line for multiple cashiers as it evens out the wait for everyone. But for goodness sake, why can't they make it obvious and politely inform people who don't see the sign right away?

In your case, especially since those in the right location for the line had not only motioned you on but verbally acknowledged that you were next, the cashier(s) should have had no further reason for comment.
Title: Re: I got in line the wrong way.
Post by: Knitterly on February 01, 2013, 03:47:59 PM
This humilated you? I can see it being awkward for a moment, but clearly everyone agreed that you were next. I'd do my best to shrug it off.


Yes it did.  It has been shrugged off, just asking a question.

I generally reserve feelings of humiliation for inadvertent pantslessness in public :) Glad you got over it.

Of course you didn't deserve to be yelled at. You don't even have to ask to know that was wrong! Are you sure she was yelling at you and not calling out to the other cashier?

I don't think the feeling of humilation is something that one can control that easily.

I know I've been in situations where I've wanted the ground to open up and swallow me whole - situations that someone else would be able to easily shrug off.  Being called out like that would certainly leave me feeling extremely embarrassed.

OP: You behaved fine.  The gentlemen behaved fine.  The cashier was extremely rude.  Her behaviour was absolutely uncalled for.

For goodness sake, how would that poor cashier react if someone had allowed someone to go in front of them for some other reason (like having only 1 item to their 50).  She was rude.  The gentlemen said you were next, ergo you were next. 
Title: Re: I got in line the wrong way.
Post by: MOM21SON on February 01, 2013, 03:52:20 PM
This was my third time in this store.  The last time 6-8 months ago.  The time before that was over a year ago.  The previous 2 times the line was right where I stood this time.  By the buy by the pound dog treats by the registers.

Moray, I don't really know who she was yelling to, she was literally yelling, not talking loud.

lowspark, that is exactly how I took it.  It made her feel good to be authoritative and call someone out.
Title: Re: I got in line the wrong way.
Post by: LeveeWoman on February 01, 2013, 03:57:46 PM
This was my third time in this store.  The last time 6-8 months ago.  The time before that was over a year ago.  The previous 2 times the line was right where I stood this time.  By the buy by the pound dog treats by the registers.

Moray, I don't really know who she was yelling to, she was literally yelling, not talking loud.

lowspark, that is exactly how I took it.  It made her feel good to be authoritative and call someone out.

It's a pity that she has such a meaningless life that she has to yell at customers who pay her wages in order to feel better about herself.
Title: Re: I got in line the wrong way.
Post by: MOM21SON on February 01, 2013, 04:06:31 PM
This was my third time in this store.  The last time 6-8 months ago.  The time before that was over a year ago.  The previous 2 times the line was right where I stood this time.  By the buy by the pound dog treats by the registers.

Moray, I don't really know who she was yelling to, she was literally yelling, not talking loud.

lowspark, that is exactly how I took it.  It made her feel good to be authoritative and call someone out.

It's a pity that she has such a meaningless life that she has to yell at customers who pay her wages in order to feel better about herself.

I would like to think she was just having a really bad day.  But, I also will never be back.
Title: Re: I got in line the wrong way.
Post by: LeveeWoman on February 01, 2013, 04:09:30 PM
This was my third time in this store.  The last time 6-8 months ago.  The time before that was over a year ago.  The previous 2 times the line was right where I stood this time.  By the buy by the pound dog treats by the registers.

Moray, I don't really know who she was yelling to, she was literally yelling, not talking loud.

lowspark, that is exactly how I took it.  It made her feel good to be authoritative and call someone out.

It's a pity that she has such a meaningless life that she has to yell at customers who pay her wages in order to feel better about herself.

I would like to think she was just having a really bad day.  But, I also will never be back.

I wonder how many she's chased off.
Title: Re: I got in line the wrong way.
Post by: Tabby Uprising on February 01, 2013, 04:09:52 PM
This humilated you? I can see it being awkward for a moment, but clearly everyone agreed that you were next. I'd do my best to shrug it off.


Yes it did.  It has been shrugged off, just asking a question.

I generally reserve feelings of humiliation for inadvertent pantslessness in public :) Glad you got over it.

Of course you didn't deserve to be yelled at. You don't even have to ask to know that was wrong! Are you sure she was yelling at you and not calling out to the other cashier?

That's what I was wondering too? Maybe you could tell yourself that if for no other reason than to make yourself feel better?  :)

It sounds like a lot of drama just for you happening to stand in the wrong place.  You sound as though you were being perfectly polite and patient and the cashiers made too much of a production out of it.  I can see where the first cashier was perhaps trying to explain why she asked if you were next in line.  "Are you next? Our layout isn't clear and I wanted to make sure I was helping the appropriate customer." I can see a comment like that being okay.

On that note, if people are "coming from all directions" they probably need to address the layout of their checkout area.  It sounds like a hassle for customers and employees.
Title: Re: I got in line the wrong way.
Post by: CrochetFanatic on February 01, 2013, 04:43:41 PM
It can be annoying (or, at the very least, awkward) when customers do this, but from what I've seen it's almost always an accident.  The cashier who yelled like that showed a serious lack of judgment, and you didn't deserve it.
Title: Re: I got in line the wrong way.
Post by: JoieGirl7 on February 01, 2013, 04:49:29 PM
Even if the Op did something wrong, no one should be yelling at her or making a big deal out of this.

I don't shop at a certain grocery store in my town even tho the prices there are a bit less because while checking out the cashier would hold a conversation with the other cashier who is behind me, chomping on her chewing gum the whole time like she was a cow out in the pasture.

It was like I didn't exist.  I didn't feel that I needed to spend my money in a place that treated me like I was invisible and where the cashiers were annoying.

If I were made to feel humiliated even if that feeling lasted a second or so, I would never shop there again.
Title: Re: I got in line the wrong way.
Post by: jpcher on February 01, 2013, 05:01:25 PM
This humilated you? I can see it being awkward for a moment, but clearly everyone agreed that you were next. I'd do my best to shrug it off.

I would have been embarrassed, just as the OP was. Being yelled at in a crowded situation where you are pointed out as being the "bad guy" would definitely be cause for me to want to shrivel up and die/hide in a hole somewhere.

The cashier who yelled like that showed a serious lack of judgment, and you didn't deserve it.

POD. People often make simple mistakes that certainly are not yell-worthy-reprimandable.


Cashier was out of line. Not you, OP. (No pun intended ;D)
Title: Re: I got in line the wrong way.
Post by: pearls n purls on February 01, 2013, 06:58:58 PM
Mistakes happen.  Yelling was not okay.

A couple years ago, a local grocery store was remodeled.   It wasn't busy and there were no lines, so I went straight to the cashier.  After I had paid he let me know I was in the express lane (and I had about 20 or so items.)  I hadn't noticed that the express lanes had been moved to the opposite of the store.  I was embarrassed, but it was an honest mistake and I would not have been happy if he had yelled at me, letting everyone nearby that I was doing it wrong.
Title: Re: I got in line the wrong way.
Post by: Piratelvr1121 on February 02, 2013, 02:33:52 AM
This humilated you? I can see it being awkward for a moment, but clearly everyone agreed that you were next. I'd do my best to shrug it off.

I would have been embarrassed, just as the OP was. Being yelled at in a crowded situation where you are pointed out as being the "bad guy" would definitely be cause for me to want to shrivel up and die/hide in a hole somewhere.

It would have made me mad rather than embarrass me, honestly. 
Title: Re: I got in line the wrong way.
Post by: nyoprinces on February 02, 2013, 05:33:56 PM
I had almost the exact same situation happen to me a few years ago - the only difference was that there were multiple people in the "non-line," because the way the store was set up, it looked like the natural place for one, and the "line starts here" sign was way at the other end of the cash stands in what was actually a different, connected store, and faced away from the entire store I was in. I sent a complaint through the corporate website because it was embarrassing (the cashier had taken several people in front of me from the "wrong" line, then yelled at me when I got up there because someone had found the "right" line and was in the process of coming through the switchback lanes).

When I visited the same store several years later, they'd remodeled so the checkstands were walled off, with one clearly-marked entrance in the middle of the two connected stores.

I don't know that my complaint made any difference, but many of them together probably did.
Title: Re: I got in line the wrong way.
Post by: Raintree on February 02, 2013, 06:59:27 PM
It sounds to me as though they need to mark the entrance to the line-up more clearly. The OP did nothing wrong and the cashier was rude.

This doesn't excuse her attitude, but she had probably been dealing all day with people who got in line in the wrong place, and people from the correct line yelling at her for taking the "wrong" people. Of course, the cashier doesn't usually get to decide how the line-up is marked, so someone should inform management that it is causing confusion.

Reminds me of a time I went into Ubiquitous Canadian Donut Chain. I am not a regular there. I had never been to that particular location. Our group of about seven walked in, and nobody else was in line, so we lined up in what seemed like a logical place (nothing was marked).  The cashier said, "Oh, you're lining up over there. Okaaaayyyy........"

After that, people started coming in and lining up in a different spot, so I gathered that they were regulars and that was where the lineup usually began. I was mildly miffed at that cashier for expecting us to know, intuitively, where to stand. It may seem like it sometimes, but not everyone goes to Ubiquitous Donut Chain every day.
Title: Re: I got in line the wrong way.
Post by: LifeOnPluto on February 02, 2013, 10:16:22 PM
If the cashier yelled at you, I hope she also yelled at all the other people who were ahead of you in the "wrong" queue.

As for how to respond, I would have politely stated that (a) the sign for the "right" lane was not clearly noticeable; and (b) there were other people ahead of me in the "wrong" lane, indicating that the queue started there.
Title: Re: I got in line the wrong way.
Post by: sweetonsno on February 03, 2013, 03:14:56 AM
The cashier clearly messed up, but I'm going to give her the benefit of the doubt and assume that she wasn't being a jerk on purpose.

I'd assume that this was a clumsy attempt to consolidate "Yes, she was next" with "Folks who are waiting, please form one line in the middle." Basically, she was intending to address the others who were(n't?) in line and totally botched it.

Other possibility is less forgivable but probably understandable: she had been dealing with customers arranged in a slightly chaotic manner rather than an organized line and was about to explode from the repetition. Obviously, it's not a customer's fault for not understanding a new system and customers haven't been told a million times. However, sometimes you forget that even though you've issued what feels like a million reminders, your audience of one hasn't heard it before.

It happens to the best of us, and I hope it didn't ruin your day.
Title: Re: I got in line the wrong way.
Post by: gen xer on February 03, 2013, 10:37:40 AM
I had something similar happen...except the cashier chastised her coworker in front of customers for taking what she thought was the wrong person ( me ) in the lineup.  I was embarrassed for the coworker.  I was in what I thought to be the line ( snaking through the gauntlet of racks full of small items, candy etc ) behind a couple of other people ( who also must have thought it was the line ) when all of a sudden it was my turn and the cashier called me up.  To which his snotty coworker said loudly "You shouldn't have taken her - she's not next.  Next time you need to take people in order."

Of course I started looking around to see a man off to the right waiting.  He did not appear to be in line at all and I can't think of anyone who would have reasonably thought so especially since two other people went ahead of me without incident.  I apologized to the cashier who got chastised because I didn't want him in trouble but was really annoyed by the other cashier's attitude.  She was glaring at both of us.

You weren't rude - she was.  It's unprofessional to call someone out like that espcially if the line is not clearly marked.
Title: Re: I got in line the wrong way.
Post by: Zilla on February 03, 2013, 01:29:40 PM
This was my third time in this store.  The last time 6-8 months ago.  The time before that was over a year ago.  The previous 2 times the line was right where I stood this time.  By the buy by the pound dog treats by the registers.

Moray, I don't really know who she was yelling to, she was literally yelling, not talking loud.

lowspark, that is exactly how I took it.  It made her feel good to be authoritative and call someone out.

It's a pity that she has such a meaningless life that she has to yell at customers who pay her wages in order to feel better about herself.

I would like to think she was just having a really bad day.  But, I also will never be back.

Bad day or not, I would have called the manager on duty and informed him or her of the cashier's behaviour. There is no possible reason to ever raise a voice at a customer and especially like that in your situation you described.  I would not be humiliated though, just be angry.  Why in the world would I be embarrassed? She is the one making herself look like a fool.