Etiquette Hell

General Etiquette => Life...in general => Topic started by: TexasRanger on March 23, 2013, 11:45:05 PM

Title: Keep or Sell?
Post by: TexasRanger on March 23, 2013, 11:45:05 PM
I am right now selling off the excess goats (three intact boys and a two year old breeding female) and have a dilema.

I know a woman down the street named "Patsy" and her DD, "Daisy".  Patsy has said she wants to buy one of my goats, she tells me she will be moving out in May and will be renting/owning land in another part of the state. Problem is, I don't believe her.

Patsy appears to be a pathological liar with financial issues.

Here are some of her stories:
1. I tell her about my goats = She bottle fed a baby with a deformed jaw.
2. She see's my horse = Her nanny got kicked in the head by a horse when they brought it into the house during a storm.
3. I tell her one of my dogs is part pit = She bred champion pits.
4. I tell her about fossils in the area = She found a super rare one on some guys land.

Patsy also has a problem with finances (she had a hot check issue and problems paying rent/utilities). She is getting the money from a settlement that I'm not even sure exists.

 Other then the above she is a nice person and a good mother to her teenage DD with autism. DD is attached to said goat. They love and take care of their dogs and cats, plus I have watched her interact with the goat.

I am not in any rush to sell the goat, I can keep her indefinably. What would be the best way to word "Is this really going to happen?"
Title: Re: Keep or Sell?
Post by: WillyNilly on March 23, 2013, 11:52:15 PM
I would just avoid the conversation with her, or say "I'll bear you in mind but I am not in any rush to sell the goat." And then when an appropriate buyer comes into your life, just sell the goat. If she asks why you sold to someone else just say "I know you were interested but after weighing all the factors, this was a better for Goat."
Title: Re: Keep or Sell?
Post by: snowdragon on March 23, 2013, 11:55:05 PM
I would keep the goat.  If I can't trust you to tell the truth, I can't trust you with my animal.  ( really a horse and a goat in a house?????)
Title: Re: Keep or Sell?
Post by: kudeebee on March 24, 2013, 12:11:19 AM
Tell her that you the goats are for sale and that you can't promise that there will be one left in May.  If there is and she has the money, you can talk then.
Title: Re: Keep or Sell?
Post by: katycoo on March 24, 2013, 03:05:46 AM
Tell her:
1. you cannot hold the goats on reserve;
2. you feel obligated to inspect their prospective homes to ensure they're going to a suitable location; and
3. if one is still available when she moves, and her property is suitable, you'd be more than happy to sell her one.
Title: Re: Keep or Sell?
Post by: TexasRanger on March 24, 2013, 09:40:05 AM
I would just avoid the conversation with her, or say "I'll bear you in mind but I am not in any rush to sell the goat." And then when an appropriate buyer comes into your life, just sell the goat. If she asks why you sold to someone else just say "I know you were interested but after weighing all the factors, this was a better for Goat."

I wish it was that easy. From her house she can see my pasture from her kitchen window. The daughter comes over before and after school to say "hi" to the goat. The goat is really helping the DD. The DD was super shy before she met the goat, then after a few sessions of petting/talking she was able to say more then two words together at a time to someone.

 She  would make a great home for the goat if the money is real. She has sacrificed alot for her existing animals and those belonging to other people. She once helped a neighbor who couldn't afford a car, take her dog to the vet to get spayed.

The goat in question is of a breed and size that is often used in Mexican dishes. That is the reason I am in no hurry to sell. My other goats are smaller and are "pet" breeds. Selling her in the normal way results in tons of replies in both English and Spanish wanting her for food, even those ads with the words "Not For Eating, Pet Only" multiple times in two languages. The goats sister when to a woman who has two kids with special needs and she witnessed the goat and DD interacting and said it was a good fit.

I'm thinking of just keeping the goat if the woman doesn't take her.
Title: Re: Keep or Sell?
Post by: JenJay on March 24, 2013, 10:10:34 AM
I wouldn't sell the goat to a stranger, out of fear she'd end up dinner.

I'd keep the goat and let the girl interact with it on my property for as long as possible. If the woman actually moves I'd be very honest with her and say "Patsy, we'd both like to keep Goat and DD together, but I have to consider your ability to care for Goat financially. Ordinarily that'd be none of my business but this is my animal and I need to do right by her. How can you be sure you'll be able to buy good quality feed? What if she needs a vet?" If she mentions the pending settlement you could say "Why don't I keep Goat for now. When your settlement comes through you call me and we'll work it out." You could offer that she's welcome to bring DD to visit the goat if you're comfortable with that.
Title: Re: Keep or Sell?
Post by: AnnaJ on March 24, 2013, 10:36:57 AM
A friend of mine gave away a dog a few years ago - problems at the time made it the best solution - and insisted on meeting the whole family and seeing the house; she was good with it but made them promise that if ever they couldn't keep the dog they would let her know and she would take the dog back.  Two years later she got that call, and was in a better situation so could take Butter back.

If you don't mind keeping the goat, it does sound wonderful for the daughter.  If mom does get a place, maybe you could put the same conditions my friend did on the deal - if she can't take care of the goat, bring it back to you.
Title: Re: Keep or Sell?
Post by: jaxsue on March 24, 2013, 10:42:11 AM
I would keep the goat.  If I can't trust you to tell the truth, I can't trust you with my animal.  ( really a horse and a goat in a house?????)

Maybe she's been watching Two Broke Girls.  :)
Title: Re: Keep or Sell?
Post by: TexasRanger on March 24, 2013, 10:44:33 AM
A friend of mine gave away a dog a few years ago - problems at the time made it the best solution - and insisted on meeting the whole family and seeing the house; she was good with it but made them promise that if ever they couldn't keep the dog they would let her know and she would take the dog back.  Two years later she got that call, and was in a better situation so could take Butter back.

If you don't mind keeping the goat, it does sound wonderful for the daughter.  If mom does get a place, maybe you could put the same conditions my friend did on the deal - if she can't take care of the goat, bring it back to you.

I will probably do that.

Title: Re: Keep or Sell?
Post by: Bijou on March 24, 2013, 03:51:02 PM
A friend of mine gave away a dog a few years ago - problems at the time made it the best solution - and insisted on meeting the whole family and seeing the house; she was good with it but made them promise that if ever they couldn't keep the dog they would let her know and she would take the dog back.  Two years later she got that call, and was in a better situation so could take Butter back.

If you don't mind keeping the goat, it does sound wonderful for the daughter.  If mom does get a place, maybe you could put the same conditions my friend did on the deal - if she can't take care of the goat, bring it back to you.

I will probably do that.
You say she is moving in May, so how can you do this?  Unless you travel to another state or area where she is living you won't be able to do so.
My feeling is this:
While I understand and appreciate your feelings for her child, you have a responsibility and obligation to place the goat in a safe and good home.  In fact, when I first started reading your original post I thought you did not want her to have the goat since you don't really trust her, and were looking for advise about how to let her down easy. 
Maybe you can put her in touch with people who sell goats where she is going to live and they can do the inspecting and so forth to make sure their goat is going to a good home.

I also have to ask...are we really talking about a goat, here, or is that a code name for something else?  That happens so often on here that I'm kind of worried that I'm talking about goats, or some other substitute thing, and everyone else knows it's really a blue 1973 Toyota with a Merle Haggard neckerchief in the glove compartment.    ;)
Title: Re: Keep or Sell?
Post by: JeanFromBNA on March 24, 2013, 04:21:19 PM

I also have to ask...are we really talking about a goat, here, or is that a code name for something else?  That happens so often on here that I'm kind of worried that I'm talking about goats, or some other substitute thing, and everyone else knows it's really a blue 1973 Toyota with a Merle Haggard neckerchief in the glove compartment.    ;)

If it is, that would be a tough stew.
Title: Re: Keep or Sell?
Post by: GreenEyedHawk on March 24, 2013, 04:30:21 PM
A friend of mine gave away a dog a few years ago - problems at the time made it the best solution - and insisted on meeting the whole family and seeing the house; she was good with it but made them promise that if ever they couldn't keep the dog they would let her know and she would take the dog back.  Two years later she got that call, and was in a better situation so could take Butter back.

If you don't mind keeping the goat, it does sound wonderful for the daughter.  If mom does get a place, maybe you could put the same conditions my friend did on the deal - if she can't take care of the goat, bring it back to you.

I will probably do that.

If this is what you choose to do (and every responsible dog bre*der I know has attached this condition to every sale of every animal ever) get it in writing. 
Title: Re: Keep or Sell?
Post by: TexasRanger on March 24, 2013, 07:08:23 PM

I also have to ask...are we really talking about a goat, here, or is that a code name for something else?  That happens so often on here that I'm kind of worried that I'm talking about goats, or some other substitute thing, and everyone else knows it's really a blue 1973 Toyota with a Merle Haggard neckerchief in the glove compartment.    ;)

If it is, that would be a tough stew.

It's a goat. More specifically a Miniature Silky Fainting X Nigerian Dwarf goat.

Her name is Artemis "Ari" and she is two years old.
(http://farm6.staticflickr.com/5453/7186137950_5cd6c3d4d9_z.jpg)
Title: Re: Keep or Sell?
Post by: Black Delphinium on March 24, 2013, 07:27:55 PM
Since she is an intact female, you could put forth to Patsy that you are holding out hope of selling Ari to another Breed3r.
Title: Re: Keep or Sell?
Post by: wonderfullyanonymous on March 24, 2013, 09:14:19 PM
I would not sell her to this lady. She does not seem like she would be responsible enough to take care of your goat. Just reading your post set off bells and whistles against selling any of them to her.

Just tell her selling to her won't be possible at this time.
Title: Re: Keep or Sell?
Post by: Bijou on March 24, 2013, 09:45:21 PM

I also have to ask...are we really talking about a goat, here, or is that a code name for something else?  That happens so often on here that I'm kind of worried that I'm talking about goats, or some other substitute thing, and everyone else knows it's really a blue 1973 Toyota with a Merle Haggard neckerchief in the glove compartment.    ;)

If it is, that would be a tough stew.
On, dear.   :'(
Title: Re: Keep or Sell?
Post by: Bijou on March 24, 2013, 09:47:54 PM

I also have to ask...are we really talking about a goat, here, or is that a code name for something else?  That happens so often on here that I'm kind of worried that I'm talking about goats, or some other substitute thing, and everyone else knows it's really a blue 1973 Toyota with a Merle Haggard neckerchief in the glove compartment.    ;)

If it is, that would be a tough stew.


It's a goat. More specifically a Miniature Silky Fainting X Nigerian Dwarf goat.

Her name is Artemis "Ari" and she is two years old.
(http://farm6.staticflickr.com/5453/7186137950_5cd6c3d4d9_z.jpg)
She's beautiful!
Title: Re: Keep or Sell?
Post by: rashea on March 25, 2013, 09:29:54 AM
I think you have to be okay with the idea that an animal you let go might not be used for the purposes you want. I know how hard that is, so I think you need to decide if you are okay with that before you give or sell this goat to anyone.
Title: Re: Keep or Sell?
Post by: Winterlight on March 25, 2013, 10:11:54 AM
She's pretty!

I would not be selling to Patsy, since you don't know what condition the place she's moving to is in.
Title: Re: Keep or Sell?
Post by: Calistoga on March 25, 2013, 10:55:58 AM
Alright. So I have to say upfront...I have no idea how much a goat sells for these days.

But since you say they are good pet owners to the other pets they have, and her DD does so well with the goat, would it be possible to make the goat a house warming gift if they ever do actually move? Look over the place she's living of course to make sure it's a good home.
Title: Re: Keep or Sell?
Post by: SPuck on March 25, 2013, 11:31:02 AM
If your gut feeling say don't sell the goat, then don't sell the goat. AnnaJ's story might have had a happy ending, and even if you get her to sign some kind of contract, once the goat is out of your possession it is out of your possession. Wouldn't you rather send the goat to somewhere you have a good feeling about?
Title: Re: Keep or Sell?
Post by: BeagleMommy on March 25, 2013, 11:41:19 AM
I would ask Patsy some very specific questions before selling the goat to her.

1.  Does she know how much it costs to feed the goat?
2.  Does her new property have enough land to support the goat?
3.  Will her landlord let her have the goat?  Some will allow cats, dogs, birds, etc. but livestock is a different story.
4.  Can she give you cash, up front, for the goat?  With her financial history this is what I would require.

There are probably more questions, but this is all I could think of right now.
Title: Re: Keep or Sell?
Post by: DavidH on March 25, 2013, 12:33:29 PM
If they love and take care of their other animals and her daughter is attached to the goat, then it doesn't sound like she would be the type to abuse or sell this goat to someone using it for a meal. 

From what I read, it sounds to me like your concern is will she really ever buy the goat and is she really moving to a new place where she can keep it.  Since you're not in a hurry to sell it and being around the goat seems to be very helpful to her daughter, why not keep the goat for now and tell her that once she moves and is settled in to her new place, you'll sell her the goat.  Until then, you'll keep it and let her know if anything changes and you decide to sell it to someone else. 
Title: Re: Keep or Sell?
Post by: TootsNYC on March 25, 2013, 12:39:04 PM
I wouldn't sell the goat to a stranger, out of fear she'd end up dinner.

I'd keep the goat and let the girl interact with it on my property for as long as possible. If the woman actually moves I'd be very honest with her and say "Patsy, we'd both like to keep Goat and DD together, but I have to consider your ability to care for Goat financially. Ordinarily that'd be none of my business but this is my animal and I need to do right by her. How can you be sure you'll be able to buy good quality feed? What if she needs a vet?" If she mentions the pending settlement you could say "Why don't I keep Goat for now. When your settlement comes through you call me and we'll work it out." You could offer that she's welcome to bring DD to visit the goat if you're comfortable with that.

I just adopted a cat. I had to fill out forms, provide work and personal references, and agree to a home visit. Two of them, actually.

I think this is perfectly reasonable for you to demand.


It's also reasonable to think that it's not your responsibility to sacrifice the goat's well-being for the child's. Another, different animal might *also* help the daughter maintain the momentum that has been established so far.
Title: Re: Keep or Sell?
Post by: TexasRanger on March 25, 2013, 02:17:31 PM
I would ask Patsy some very specific questions before selling the goat to her.

1.  Does she know how much it costs to feed the goat?
2.  Does her new property have enough land to support the goat?
3.  Will her landlord let her have the goat?  Some will allow cats, dogs, birds, etc. but livestock is a different story.
4.  Can she give you cash, up front, for the goat?  With her financial history this is what I would require.

There are probably more questions, but this is all I could think of right now.

1. She does. One 50lb bag is $9 and would last a month. Hay is anywhere between $7-$11, she doesn't need horse quality, goats are good with straw and pasture. Trace mineral and salt are $5.
2. Several goats can live on 2 acres, so that shouldn't be a problem.
3.Usually if your renting several acres, livestock is ok.
4. I only take cash, she knows this.