Etiquette Hell

General Etiquette => Techno-quette => Topic started by: gena264 on April 19, 2013, 09:01:37 AM

Title: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: gena264 on April 19, 2013, 09:01:37 AM
I posted about a friend before who had a somewhat irritating way of texting. For a bit of background, we knew each other in HS and started emailing on facebook and then exchanged numbers to text as it was easier. This is a male friend (if that matters, I am not sure) and I am female. Anyway, we have been catching up again on old classmates and he initiates almost all of our texting conversations. During the course of long conversations he will sometimes say ,"brb', and then not return. That is pretty irritating but I can understand that somewhat when we have been texting for some time.

 Here is what I don't understand. He sent me a text at 10pm my time a few days ago (he is two hours behind me, so 8pm his time). It was late and I didn't feel like talking so I didn't respond. His text simply said , "hi!". The next night at around 7 pm his time he texts me , "or not". I reply back right away with , "hi, sorry". he replies back no problem he is just BBQ ing his dinner. We make small talk for maybe 2 texts back and forth and then he asks if he can text me back later as he is just getting ready to eat. I say sure, and he says , "be back shortly" and never returns.

First of all, why text if you know in 2 minutes you are going to have to go eat? Why say you will be back shortly and never return?

I just don't understand the whole initiating a conversation when you know you can't talk in the first place? Is this how most people text? For me, if I am texting someone and that is our only means of conversation (we don't see each other in person or talk on the phone) , I am texting to TALK , much like a phone call. I wouldn't call someone to say hi if I know I am getting ready to sit down to dinner (or start to drive, or go into work) , I would wait until I had time to actually talk . It's like calling someone and saying hi, how are you? That's good, well gotta go eat dinner now, I'll call you back, and then I don't even call back.. what's the point? Is this rude texting behavior?
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: artk2002 on April 19, 2013, 09:28:58 AM
I think that your core problem is that you are treating texting like an actual conversation. One of the beauties of texting is that you don't have to answer immediately. I'll use it for short discussions, like negotiating carpooling with my ex, but that's about it. If I want to have a sustained conversation, then I'll use the phone.

I don't really see anything wrong with the exchange in your 2nd paragraph. You didn't have to respond to the ', or not', just as you didn't respond to the initial reply. He wanted a brief exchange with a break in it. Again, that's the beauty of texting.
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: laceandbits on April 19, 2013, 10:02:13 AM
Texts are a bit like e-mails as when you send them you have no idea when they'll be received, if the person you are texting is asleep, or eating or at the movies, so if you want to use texts instead of talking, you just have to wait until both of you both happen to be free at the same time.  But if I wanted a "conversation" I certainly would prefer to talk than text which even with abbreviations is soooo slow and with no subtleties of meaning.  I text only if I need a chance at an answer very quickly, but it's not appropriate to phone or email.  My daughter when at work would be a good example.

Regarding brb and other similar expressions of getting back to you, they need to be taken with an enormous pinch of salt or ignored altogether.  In the same way as in real life "I'll be there in a minute" is never 60 seconds.  And the really irritating and increasingly common in the UK, "see ya later" from a shop assistant, for example, who you will probably never see again. 

But as it obviously annoys you as much as it would me, just make sure you never do it from your end; if you say brb, then brb.  I would put about 15 minutes max on that one for it to be true.  Be back shortly, maybe an hour.  Any longer just say you're having a busy time and will catch up another day.  Anything over an hour and it's all too easy for other things to distract you so even if you had the best of intentions, you forget all about the texting.
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: gena264 on April 19, 2013, 10:12:00 AM
Texts are a bit like e-mails as when you send them you have no idea when they'll be received, if the person you are texting is asleep, or eating or at the movies, so if you want to use texts instead of talking, you just have to wait until both of you both happen to be free at the same time.  But if I wanted a "conversation" I certainly would prefer to talk than text which even with abbreviations is soooo slow and with no subtleties of meaning.  I text only if I need a chance at an answer very quickly, but it's not appropriate to phone or email.  My daughter when at work would be a good example.

Regarding brb and other similar expressions of getting back to you, they need to be taken with an enormous pinch of salt or ignored altogether.  In the same way as in real life "I'll be there in a minute" is never 60 seconds.  And the really irritating and increasingly common in the UK, "see ya later" from a shop assistant, for example, who you will probably never see again. 

But as it obviously annoys you as much as it would me, just make sure you never do it from your end; if you say brb, then brb.  I would put about 15 minutes max on that one for it to be true.  Be back shortly, maybe an hour.  Any longer just say you're having a busy time and will catch up another day.  Anything over an hour and it's all too easy for other things to distract you so even if you had the best of intentions, you forget all about the texting.

Right, that is something else I don't get. If I say brb, I mean I will literally brb in about 15 minutes tops, like you said. IF it turns out I can't or something comes up, then I send a text back saying so to the person so they aren't left wondering where I went.  It seems like the polite thing to do...

I also understand a bit better now when you said that when sending a text, you don't know when it will be received. So I guess in this case, he sent the , "or not", text, and maybe didn't think I would reply back right away. I don't know, he does have a habit of seemingly always initiating texts, then having to 'brb', and then disappears for days and it starts all over again.
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: CakeBeret on April 19, 2013, 10:29:50 AM
Well, I'll contradict Art. I think it's kind of asinine to strike up a text conversation and then 2 minutes later drop it. Sometimes I will text a friend when I don't have time to talk but I need to say something specific, but that's different from starting up a "Hi, how are ya" chitchat 2 minutes before you have to go.

I would call the situation weird and a little annoying, but I'm not sure it really crosses the line into rude.
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: EllenS on April 19, 2013, 04:29:09 PM
Coming from the totally opposite end of the spectrum, I can't imagine using text to "converse" with someone when you are both on your phones. Why not just talk by voice instead of typing? 

To me, texts are like putting sticky-notes on someone's desk or on the fridge.  "don't forget the milk" "leaving late, see you at 6:30".  "call me when you get home" Live-chat texting seems like two people leaving notes for each other when they are in the same room and could just talk.
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: Sharnita on April 19, 2013, 04:30:16 PM
Coming from the totally opposite end of the spectrum, I can't imagine using text to "converse" with someone when you are both on your phones. Why not just talk by voice instead of typing? 

To me, texts are like putting sticky-notes on someone's desk or on the fridge.  "don't forget the milk" "leaving late, see you at 6:30".  "call me when you get home" Live-chat texting seems like two people leaving notes for each other when they are in the same room and could just talk.

I tend to look at it the same way.
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: NyaChan on April 19, 2013, 09:10:13 PM
Coming from the totally opposite end of the spectrum, I can't imagine using text to "converse" with someone when you are both on your phones. Why not just talk by voice instead of typing? 

To me, texts are like putting sticky-notes on someone's desk or on the fridge.  "don't forget the milk" "leaving late, see you at 6:30".  "call me when you get home" Live-chat texting seems like two people leaving notes for each other when they are in the same room and could just talk.

I tend to look at it the same way.

I know it seems weird, but in my generation (or at least the members of it that I spend time around) it is almost considered an imposition to call someone when a text would have done just as well.  For quick questions for example it takes up more of a person's time and these days it also is a sign of familiarity with a person that may or may not actually exist.  As in I can call my close friend to talk about something lengthy, but if it is another student I'm working with on a project, I would only text or email.  If I need to call for ease's sake, I text first to ask if now is a good time.  Most people I spend time with operate under the same practices.  If I get a call from a not so close friend, my mind immediately starts wondering if something is wrong/or if there is an emergency.
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: MariaE on April 20, 2013, 04:35:43 AM
I don't think either of you is in the wrong - your texting habits are just mostly incompatible.
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: blahblahblah on April 20, 2013, 02:02:03 PM

I know it seems weird, but in my generation (or at least the members of it that I spend time around) it is almost considered an imposition to call someone when a text would have done just as well.  For quick questions for example it takes up more of a person's time and these days it also is a sign of familiarity with a person that may or may not actually exist.  As in I can call my close friend to talk about something lengthy, but if it is another student I'm working with on a project, I would only text or email.  If I need to call for ease's sake, I text first to ask if now is a good time.  Most people I spend time with operate under the same practices.  If I get a call from a not so close friend, my mind immediately starts wondering if something is wrong/or if there is an emergency.
Yep, same here. I'm in my late twenties, to give a sense of my age demographic, and this is how texting is viewed in my circles as well. I personally don't like it, because I'm not a fan of texting, but....sigh.
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: DottyG on April 21, 2013, 09:37:16 PM
I don't think either of you is in the wrong - your texting habits are just mostly incompatible.

This.

Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: artk2002 on April 22, 2013, 09:05:08 AM
Coming from the totally opposite end of the spectrum, I can't imagine using text to "converse" with someone when you are both on your phones. Why not just talk by voice instead of typing? 

To me, texts are like putting sticky-notes on someone's desk or on the fridge.  "don't forget the milk" "leaving late, see you at 6:30".  "call me when you get home" Live-chat texting seems like two people leaving notes for each other when they are in the same room and could just talk.

I tend to look at it the same way.

I know it seems weird, but in my generation (or at least the members of it that I spend time around) it is almost considered an imposition to call someone when a text would have done just as well.  For quick questions for example it takes up more of a person's time and these days it also is a sign of familiarity with a person that may or may not actually exist.  As in I can call my close friend to talk about something lengthy, but if it is another student I'm working with on a project, I would only text or email.  If I need to call for ease's sake, I text first to ask if now is a good time.  Most people I spend time with operate under the same practices.  If I get a call from a not so close friend, my mind immediately starts wondering if something is wrong/or if there is an emergency.

It has nothing to do with generations. This is how I use texting as well and I'm 1 if not 1.5 generations ahead of you. If it's a short "Are you getting the boys or am I?" a text message is perfect (unless I need an answer in the next hour or so.) The other person may be driving or in the middle of teaching and a text allows them to respond when they can. If I want a conversation, as in "what are we going to do about #1 son's chemistry grade?" then a phone call is the right way to go.
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: Rhindle on April 23, 2013, 09:03:07 PM
Coming from the totally opposite end of the spectrum, I can't imagine using text to "converse" with someone when you are both on your phones. Why not just talk by voice instead of typing? 

To me, texts are like putting sticky-notes on someone's desk or on the fridge.  "don't forget the milk" "leaving late, see you at 6:30".  "call me when you get home" Live-chat texting seems like two people leaving notes for each other when they are in the same room and could just talk.

Some of us would rather read and type than speak and listen. I find it more soothing to communicate that way. I use texting both as a "note-leaving" method and as a conversation medium.
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: WillyNilly on April 23, 2013, 10:24:46 PM
Coming from the totally opposite end of the spectrum, I can't imagine using text to "converse" with someone when you are both on your phones. Why not just talk by voice instead of typing? 

To me, texts are like putting sticky-notes on someone's desk or on the fridge.  "don't forget the milk" "leaving late, see you at 6:30".  "call me when you get home" Live-chat texting seems like two people leaving notes for each other when they are in the same room and could just talk.

Some of us would rather read and type than speak and listen. I find it more soothing to communicate that way. I use texting both as a "note-leaving" method and as a conversation medium.

Yup. 

Quite honestly I find the anti-text stance on these boards a bit holier then thou sometimes. No one has to like texting, but its not a wrong way to chat. I don't like the phone. I never liked the phone. Not back in high school in the 90's before a personal cell phone was even a far away dream let alone a reality. And now that there is texting and email, I see no reason to use the phone for pleasure ever, because its never ever pleasurable for me. heck i refused to do business with any vending vendor that wouldn't do the preliminary and follow-up business via email. I enjoy talking in person, or texting/emailing if not in person. And I'm not wrong or lesser for it. If [general] you don't like text conversations, fab for you, but you aren't a better person or conversationalist then I am for it.

But the reality is, just like in-person conversations vary in style (see the Life in General thread "How do you Converse"), so too do text conversation styles. And I think that's what this is boiling down to, a difference in style. For some people "TTYL" or "brb" means 5 minutes, others 5 days. Its ok to not like someone else's style or not mesh conversationally. Its frustrating but its a reality of life - some friend ships work out, some don't.
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: DottyG on April 24, 2013, 12:12:29 PM
True.

Which goes back to how MariaE summed it up.

Quote
I don't think either of you is in the wrong - your texting habits are just mostly incompatible.

Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: reflection5 on April 24, 2013, 12:35:49 PM
Quote
Live-chat texting seems like two people leaving notes for each other when they are in the same room and could just talk.

This.

There are times when it’s ok to text and other times when a conversation is necessary.  Texting should be a supplement, not a substitution for a real conversation.  If someone never wants to have an actual conversation they are most likely lazy, socially inept, or they are (for some reason) avoiding real live communication.
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: Piratelvr1121 on April 24, 2013, 12:49:38 PM
I'm with Art in that I don't think generations have anything to do with it. The friend that got me texting as much as I do? My friend that's 22 years older than I.  I mean I texted a bit before that, but the amount of texting that goes on between myself and bff has really necessitated the need for a phone with a QWERTY keyboard and an unlimited texting plan.

And there are a lot of times it's just more convenient than calling.  Recently I've been texting her about decisions for our camping trip and the two nights she'll be staying here.  "You bringing your own pillows? We do still have some for you here." or "Hey your cot arrived, want me to put it together to be sure all the parts are there?" That certainly doesn't warrant a call. 

But sometimes if one of us misreads the tone of a text, or she has something to tell me that either would take too long to text or is best told over the phone, then we call.  She says she hates talking on the phone, and I am not too crazy about it either, generally but let me tell you, we've made good use of the free mobile to mobile minutes we get for being with the same cellular company.  There've been times we've chatted in excess of an hour.
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: Judah on April 24, 2013, 12:52:58 PM
Quote
Live-chat texting seems like two people leaving notes for each other when they are in the same room and could just talk.

This.

There are times when it’s ok to text and other times when a conversation is necessary.  Texting should be a supplement, not a substitution for a real conversation.  If someone never wants to have an actual conversation they are most likely lazy, socially inept, or they are (for some reason) avoiding real live communication.

That's more than a little offensive. People have different communication styles and preferences and none of them are wrong. I don't talk on the phone. I don't like it at all. I'm not "lazy, socially inept, or they are (for some reason) avoiding real live communication", I just don't like talking on the phone.  Texting works for me.
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: reflection5 on April 24, 2013, 12:59:22 PM
Quote
Live-chat texting seems like two people leaving notes for each other when they are in the same room and could just talk.

This.

There are times when it’s ok to text and other times when a conversation is necessary.  Texting should be a supplement, not a substitution for a real conversation.  If someone never wants to have an actual conversation they are most likely lazy, socially inept, or they are (for some reason) avoiding real live communication.

That's more than a little offensive. People have different communication styles and preferences and none of them are wrong. I don't talk on the phone. I don't like it at all. I'm not "lazy, socially inept, or they are (for some reason) avoiding real live communication", I just don't like talking on the phone.  Texting works for me.

Who said anything about the phone?  Where in my post did I say anything about talking on the phone?  Is soneome tryingi to force you to talk on the phone?

Frankly, I don't see why you are offended.  If you NEVER want to talk to human beings in person or on the phone, and think that's okay, then don't.  However, you say texting works for you and if that's what you wish to do the rest of your life, well, good luck finding and keeping people in your life who will go along with it.
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: Judah on April 24, 2013, 01:04:34 PM
Who said anything about the phone?  Where in my post did I say anything about talking on the phone?

Frankly, I don't see why you are offended.  If you NEVER want to talk to human beings in person or on the phone, and think that's okay, then that's your right.  However, you say texting works for you and if that's what you wish to do the rest of your life, well, good luck finding and keeping people in your life who will go along with it.

A conversation can easily be had via text, which is what this thread is about. 
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: reflection5 on April 24, 2013, 01:17:49 PM
Who said anything about the phone?  Where in my post did I say anything about talking on the phone?

Frankly, I don't see why you are offended.  If you NEVER want to talk to human beings in person or on the phone, and think that's okay, then that's your right.  However, you say texting works for you and if that's what you wish to do the rest of your life, well, good luck finding and keeping people in your life who will go along with it.

A conversation can easily be had via text, which is what this thread is about.

Which doesn't answer my questions, but that's fine.  Your post was about how you hate talking on the phone.

Just sayin' - I don't know of anyone who can get thru life without, at some point, opening their mouth and talking (in person or on the phone).  If you can, then so be it.
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: cass2591 on April 24, 2013, 01:46:24 PM
Reflections, it would serve you greatly if you changed the nature of your posts. Perhaps reading them objectively before you hit send, because you sure are coming off rather harshly.



.
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: lurkerwisp on April 24, 2013, 04:29:53 PM
Who said anything about the phone?  Where in my post did I say anything about talking on the phone?

Frankly, I don't see why you are offended.  If you NEVER want to talk to human beings in person or on the phone, and think that's okay, then that's your right.  However, you say texting works for you and if that's what you wish to do the rest of your life, well, good luck finding and keeping people in your life who will go along with it.

A conversation can easily be had via text, which is what this thread is about.

Personally, I dislike texting on my phone because it's awkward and I don't have a text messaging plan which makes it expensive.  I do, however, pretty much communicate with most of my friends exclusively through text - just not phone based text messaging.  We're spread pretty far over the country now and none of us could afford to be that talkative over long distance phone call rates, but even when we were in shouting distance of each other's dorms we still used IM instead of the phone to get multiple people in one conversation at a time without having to seriously interrupt schoolwork to do so.

That said, one of my inlaws will only communicate via text messages on his phone, even when we're meeting in person.  He's deaf, and texting is how he can talk to me even though I don't know sign language.  He owns a tech company and we've a lot of interests in common that I would never be able to know about if I stuck to verbal communication as some kind of gold standard.  It's awesome that we are still able to communicate, and I am ever thankful for the technology that allows it.  :)

It sounds like OP is looking at text messaging as more of an instant messaging type thing.  When I IM a friend, I know they're online, can see that they're available, and on some chat clients can even see when my messages have been marked as read.  So in that case it's to be expected that people will answer back quickly because you can see that they're there.  IM conversations tend to start and stop and jump back erratically, but then internet connections can be fickle, and a person can't sit at a computer all the time, so that's just the nature of the beast.

Texting, on a phone, is more like email.  You can't see if the other person is available, or even has their phone on.  The message gets to them when it gets to them, so you've got to just be patient waiting on a response.  It's possible that OP's buddy isn't really entirely considering it like an IM, but more like a speedy email, while still using the IM type conventions of BRB to say that he's AFK for a while.  His lingo isn't so much matching his usage, but like PP's have said, it's just an incompatibility of texting styles going on, not something really rude.
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: reflection5 on April 24, 2013, 09:14:48 PM
Quote
He's deaf, and texting is how he can talk to me even though I don't know sign language.  He owns a tech company and we've a lot of interests in common that I would never be able to know about if I stuck to verbal communication as some kind of gold standard.  It's awesome that we are still able to communicate, and I am ever thankful for the technology that allows it.

lurkerwisp - Yes, I forgot to mention that texting (and also email) are great for people with hearing impairments or speech impediments.

However, I’m glad I have cassette recordings of my nieces and nephews talking and singing songs when they were toddlers.  I’m happy that some friends and relatives still call once in a while and we still see each other in person and talk.  I also have good memories of phone chats with my mother and older brother.  If they were still around, I wouldn’t dream of telling them “I HATE TO TALK ON THE PHONE  >:(  SEND ME A TEXT MESSAGE.” and hanging up.
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: lurkerwisp on April 25, 2013, 09:45:26 AM
If they were still around, I wouldn’t dream of telling them “I HATE TO TALK IN THE PHONE  >:(  SEND ME A TEXT MESSAGE.” and hanging up.

I don't think anyone upthread said anything about hanging up on someone who calls?
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: NyaChan on April 25, 2013, 11:43:53 AM
If they were still around, I wouldn’t dream of telling them “I HATE TO TALK IN THE PHONE  >:(  SEND ME A TEXT MESSAGE.” and hanging up.

I don't think anyone upthread said anything about hanging up on someone who calls?

If I am initiating the conversation and would prefer to text on that occasion, I just text.  If they choose to call me back rather than texting me back, I talk.  What you described is a rude response and an extreme one at that - I don't believe anyone in this thread is advocating for that.
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: Moray on April 25, 2013, 11:46:40 AM
If they were still around, I wouldn’t dream of telling them “I HATE TO TALK IN THE PHONE  >:(  SEND ME A TEXT MESSAGE.” and hanging up.

I don't think anyone upthread said anything about hanging up on someone who calls?

Yeah. Where are you getting that?

Personally, I like to do both, but I primarily text, because it allows me to stay in contact with say, my sister, or the guy I'm dating, in a more casual, less response-driven manner throughout the day. If we need an immediate response, we might call, but generally, nothing's so urgent that it can't wait for an hour or two. We still talk in person and have our heart-to-hearts, but generally, we're texting folk. Sometimes, my sister or I will even say to each other "I'm kind of busy right now; text me!" and I fail to see how that makes us somehow lazy or not invested in our relationships.

We might exchange a couple of texts just because we saw a cool sculpture on the way in, or want to say "thinking of you" without having a 5-10 minute conversation. Sometimes we might just text "Squirrell!" for no reason. Because we like texting. We like that we can communicate a quick note, or have a conversation (real time, or not!) with someone without having to coordinate schedules or take a long break from whatever else we may be doing. If anything, texting keeps us more connected.
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: reflection5 on April 25, 2013, 11:55:17 AM
The point is 1) texting is a great tool for people who are hearing or sheech impaired in some way, and 2) (for me) there have been and still are occasions when hearing the voice (in person or on the phone) of someone I care about (and them hearing mine) is important.  That’s all I was trying to convey, but I do understand that not everyone feels that way.
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: Moray on April 25, 2013, 12:01:47 PM
The point is 1) texting is a great tool for people who are impaired in some way 2) (for me) there have been and still are occasions when hearing the voice (in person or on the phone) of someone I care about (and them hearing mine) is important.  That’s all I was trying to convey, but I do understand that not everyone feels that way.

So it's not a good tool for people who aren't impaired? Huh?

I'm very confused as to what you meant by " I wouldn’t dream of telling them “I HATE TO TALK ON THE PHONE  >:(  SEND ME A TEXT MESSAGE.” and hanging up."

It's like you're implying that people who prefer texting would be that rude ('cause we're lazy or something), and that's mighty offensive.

Texting and calling are both great means of communication. I'm not getting the prejudice one way or the other.
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: reflection5 on April 25, 2013, 12:12:50 PM
??? Moray -
If you will go to my (unedited) post #15 you will see that I said:

Quote
There are times when it’s ok to text and other times when a conversation is necessary.  Texting should be a supplement, not a substitution for a real conversation.

I also see nothing wrong with agreeing (with another member) that texting is a great tool for people with hearing and speech limitations.

I've gotten into enough trouble in this thread, and I really don't want to irritate the mod or other members, so even if some people want to continue to try to argue and take offense at (whatever), I have no more to say here.

Peace, out.   :)
Title: Re: Texting Rudeness?
Post by: Moray on April 25, 2013, 12:23:09 PM
??? Moray -
If you will go to my (unedited) post #15 you will see that I said:

Quote
There are times when it’s ok to text and other times when a conversation is necessary.  Texting should be a supplement, not a substitution for a real conversation.
[/b]
I also see nothing wrong with agreeing (with another member) that texting is a great tool for people with hearing and speech limitations.

I've gotten into enough trouble in this thread, and I really don't want to irritate the mod or other members, so even if some people want to continue to try to argue and take offense at (whatever), I have no more to say here.

Peace, out.   :)

Yes. And many of us are saying that your attitude is still wicked judgemental, and that the obvious judgement is irritating. We are telling you that (even without any physical limitations) we see it as a valuable medium in its own right. Not just a supplement. You seem to find that inconceivable.

Just answer me one thing: Where did you the idea of "I wouldn’t dream of telling them “I HATE TO TALK ON THE PHONE  SEND ME A TEXT MESSAGE.” as something that needed to be said to us? I am legitimately confused as to how you got that sentiment from anything any of the posters in this thread have said. Your bolded explanation does not explain that in the slightest.