Etiquette Hell

General Etiquette => Techno-quette => Topic started by: kitchcat on May 23, 2013, 10:27:43 AM

Title: Craigslist query-- what's the norm?
Post by: kitchcat on May 23, 2013, 10:27:43 AM
I've sold a handful of items on Craigslist before. All but one time, the buyers came to my house to pick up the item. On one exception, I met with the buyer in a store parking lot because she was having difficultly locating my home. Whenever I've purchased items from Craigslist, I've always picked them up from the buyer's home. I assumed this was the norm.

Yesterday, I listed a piece of furniture on Craigslist and a woman emailed me asking if it was still available. I said yes. Her reply? "Great. Can you be at my home in two hours to drop it off?"  :o On top of that her address was at least a hour drive from my home! Jaw met floor. I replied bluntly, "I'm not going to deliver it. If you want it, you have to come get it from my home." She responded, "I was not asking you to deliver it! I was asking if you happened to be in the area and could drop it off!"  ??? Huh? So you're asking me BY EMAIL if I happen to be driving around your home by chance with the piece of furniture in my car? Firstly, no. Secondly, that would still count as delivering it. But I digress.

Would you assume there is norm when it comes to buying an item off Craigslist? I would never even think of asking a seller to come to me.
Title: Re: Craigslist query-- what's the norm?
Post by: Seven Ate Nine on May 23, 2013, 10:30:43 AM
I personally prefer public location exchanges, but I would never expect someone to drop something off at my house.  DH did buy something off of CL that was going to be dropped off at our house, but at the last minute our dinner plans went awry and we were closer to the person's house so he brought it to us in town instead.  I have seen several ads that specify that there is no drop off, so I do wonder how many people expect it.
Title: Re: Craigslist query-- what's the norm?
Post by: Outdoor Girl on May 23, 2013, 10:31:17 AM
I would always assume that I was picking up the item at the seller's home or another place of our mutual choosing if s/he didn't want to tell me where they live.  In light of recent events here in Ontario, I wouldn't be upset at all being asked to meet someone at a mall, rather than their home.

But to assume that the seller was going to deliver?  Never.

ETA:  If it was a large item, I might enquire of the seller:  'I'm interested in purchasing [item] but I don't have a vehicle large enough to pick it up.  Would you be willing and able to deliver it?  I'd be willing to pay an extra $[amt] for delivery.'
Title: Re: Craigslist query-- what's the norm?
Post by: Cat-Fu on May 23, 2013, 10:38:24 AM
Entitled requests are a pretty common occurrence on craigslist. Some people charge extra for delivery. I just say "no delivery" in the ad itself and ignore anyone who still wants me to deliver stuff.
Title: Re: Craigslist query-- what's the norm?
Post by: NyaChan on May 23, 2013, 10:43:38 AM
I had someone ask me to deliver even after I specifically stated that the couch was pick-up only.  I even took $50 off of the price so she could rent a truck to come get it. Then she canceled the day of pick-up saying she couldn't come get it, only to call and text me repeatedly the next day acting shocked that I was no longer around to sell her the couch.  Sorry honey, I said Sunday pick-up only, gave you the option of Friday or early Monday as an additional courtesy, so no, I'm not going to waste half a day sitting in an almost empty apartment when I could have been two states away by then. 

ETA:  I offered to store some items for a fellow student over the summer.  She filled my apartment which I was subletting with her things without telling me and booked it out of town.  She then listed various items on Craigslist, again without telling me, and only informed me that people might be stopping by my place to look at her stuff.  I was not happy.

So I wouldn't assume it was home pick-up and I wouldn't assume it was delivery.  I would expect it to specify in the ad which options were available and if it wasn't, I'd ask what they were, not demand the one I wanted.
Title: Re: Craigslist query-- what's the norm?
Post by: ladyknight1 on May 23, 2013, 10:45:22 AM
Seems bizarre to me, but I have experienced strange contact every time I have posted something on Craigslist.
Title: Re: Craigslist query-- what's the norm?
Post by: amylouky on May 23, 2013, 11:56:19 AM

ETA:  If it was a large item, I might enquire of the seller:  'I'm interested in purchasing [item] but I don't have a vehicle large enough to pick it up.  Would you be willing and able to deliver it?  I'd be willing to pay an extra $[amt] for delivery.'

I've done exactly this with good results. I would definitely expect to pay extra if the person is able to deliver, because the norm is for the buyer to pick up the item, either at the seller's home or a public location. I prefer public locations myself but I have had a few people pick up larger items here (and one delivery of a racecar bed  :)  )
Title: Re: Craigslist query-- what's the norm?
Post by: 25wishes on May 23, 2013, 12:56:28 PM
I have this happen even when I am GIVING away stuff on Freecycle, to the point that I put a disclaimer in each listing, I do not go out often and can not meet you anywhere. (also I do not have a cell phone so it really wouldn't work).

It's FREE - pick it up if you want it!! Geesh...
Title: Re: Craigslist query-- what's the norm?
Post by: Slartibartfast on May 23, 2013, 02:32:24 PM
I have this happen even when I am GIVING away stuff on Freecycle, to the point that I put a disclaimer in each listing, I do not go out often and can not meet you anywhere. (also I do not have a cell phone so it really wouldn't work).

It's FREE - pick it up if you want it!! Geesh...

I recently offered an XBox on Freecycle - DH had gotten it (one of the original ones) for free somehow and we've never used it, and he finally admitted he wasn't likely to bother setting it up.  I very specifically said in my listing that I would only give it to someone who replied with a specific date and time they could come pick it up - I'd much rather be able to say "Sure, that sounds good!" than have to go the additional step of "You're first; when can you get it?" and having to do another back-and-forth.

I got twelve replies, only ONE of which offered to pick it up at a specific date and time.  She wasn't first, but guess who got a reply from me?   ::)
Title: Re: Craigslist query-- what's the norm?
Post by: lowspark on May 23, 2013, 03:09:50 PM
In my experience, the norm is to meet somewhere mutually agreeable or for the buyer to come to the seller. I quit meeting people in neutral places because when they don't show up, you're stuck somewhere waiting. I always just have them come to my home (and especially if it's furniture I'm selling) and if they don't bother to come, well, no skin off my nose.

I have neither the equipment nor the muscle to move heavy furniture. You want it? Come 'n' get it.
Title: Re: Craigslist query-- what's the norm?
Post by: MommyPenguin on May 23, 2013, 03:39:48 PM
I just joined a new Freecycle (we moved to a new area), and it has a two strikes rule.  If somebody doesn't show up when they're supposed to, and they don't contact you and explain the emergency or whatever, you can contact the moderators and tell them.  They'll issue the person a warning.  If the person does it twice, they lose their account.  It makes me much happier about using this new Freecycle, as I feel I can be reasonably sure that I will have fewer no-shows than I have in the past, because people would get booted if they did it.
Title: Re: Craigslist query-- what's the norm?
Post by: CakeBeret on May 23, 2013, 03:52:19 PM
A couple weeks ago, about 10PM one evening, I offered a free box of books on CL and said I would give preference to whoever would pick them up first. I got a couple emails before I went to bed and arranged for a very nice lady to pick them up about 10AM the next morning.

I woke up to a dozen emails in the morning and replied to them all with a quick note that they were pending pickup but I'd notify them if it didn't work out. One person emailed me back and said that she felt she should get the books because she could pick them up "right now" (about 9am, so an hour earlier than the other person) but I'd have to meet her in a public place because she didn't feel comfortable picking them up at my house. I thought it was pretty cheeky for her to try and trump the other person's claim while simultaneously demanding that I inconvenience myself to meet her in a public place.

OP, I'm pretty impressed at the gall of the person in your story. Wow!
Title: Re: Craigslist query-- what's the norm?
Post by: GSNW on May 24, 2013, 03:30:36 PM
Seems bizarre to me, but I have experienced strange contact every time I have posted something on Craigslist.

This!!!  Selling stuff on CL can get so weird.

As a buyer, if I want something I can't go get myself, I would expect to pay more in asking NICELY if the person was willing to deliver.  I've seen a lot of ads that state, "Delivery is absolutely not available, sorry" which may or may not have deterred the woman who answered OP's ad.

Title: Re: Craigslist query-- what's the norm?
Post by: Mikayla on May 25, 2013, 04:08:43 PM
Overall, I've had very good experience with craigslist. I think if there's a one size fits all answer, it's just to communicate well what you want.  In a couple of random instances, I needed delivery, but I went out of my way to explain that I knew exactly what they were offering and I guaranteed I'd purchase it.  In other words, I knew it was a slightly "off" request, so I tried to mitigate it.  Also, I made sure to find ads close to me and I offered a stipend for the trip.

Also, most of what I've sold has been items small enough to where we meet "at" my home, but the item itself is outside or in the garage. 
Title: Re: Craigslist query-- what's the norm?
Post by: takeheart on June 23, 2013, 07:49:47 PM
I've sold a lot through Craigslist (from rims/tires to a wedding set). I've either met them publicly with a friend by my side or had them come to our home while DH and I were home. When we sell, if we're able to deliver, we include that in the ad but it comes with a fee and is usually only within city limits. Delivery, especially an hour away, is definitely not the norm.
Title: Re: Craigslist query-- what's the norm?
Post by: VorFemme on June 23, 2013, 09:23:13 PM
I offered moving boxes of a particular size on Freecycle - I got asked to send a picture of them???

I contacted the next person in line - because if someone doesn't know what a moving box looks like (one of the named sizes - dishpack, wardrobe, etc.) - a photo isn't going to be enough information without measurements and I didn't feel like taking the time....

The second person never did come by - so the third person picked it up "that night" when I let them know that they were under my porch and that they had come to the top of the list.  Now I have a little more space to sort through things to take to Goodwill or trash (some things didn't fare well in the move, some things didn't fare well in the storage area, and a few things were outgrown between the move & when I started trying to unpack - eleven year olds grow fast).
Title: Re: Craigslist query-- what's the norm?
Post by: steelstress on July 07, 2013, 08:01:21 PM
Something I dealt with this past week:

I posted a like new small animal carrier... think rat, hamster.  Asking $7.  One lady lived 40 miles away and wanted me to meet her halfway because she thought "that would be fair."  Um, no... it'll cost me that much in gas round trip...why don't you go to the local chain pet store where it costs $15.00?  She said she's trying to save money. ::)

The next one lived...50 miles away, though she was perfectly fine driving 30 of those miles to meet me.  Um, no,... it'll cost me that much in gas round trip...why don't you go to the local chain pet store where it costs $15.00?  She said she's trying to save money. ::)  >:(

Another one... a guy didn't exactly know where my city was, so he had to ask me how long a drive it would be.  It would be 1.5 hours.  Why is he even looking at ads in my area????  :o

I still have the item, just received a new response and I asked her if she was local so she can pick up, and explained about the previous two responses.  I've still yet to hear back.
Title: Re: Craigslist query-- what's the norm?
Post by: 25wishes on July 24, 2013, 06:38:04 AM
I just had ANOTHER one - posted FREE items on Freecycle, with my proviso that I do not get out much and can not meet them anywhere.

One answer suggested I donate them about 30 miles away.

The other wanted some of the items, and suggested I could arrange with whoever got the rest, to drop off to her the ones she wanted.

Honestly, some people....

BTW, someone came yesterday and took them all. Drove right up to my house, imagine that.
Title: Re: Craigslist query-- what's the norm?
Post by: VorFemme on July 24, 2013, 08:21:42 AM
I get the impression that a lot of people read only the key words and not the whole message.  They will ask for a WHOLE THING when I am offering a half thing - but posting "parts" to XXXX can still get people asking for the whole thing, as I guess they think that they can fix the XXXX.  Even if the post is that all I have is the parts....although the drafting table base got picked up by someone who was happy to go to the local hardware store and buy a sheet of plywood to make his own table top!  The base was all that would fit in the trunk of his car in one trip!

+++++++++++++++++

I posted a chair BASE (wheeled office chair with lift - they are pretty standard) as the leather was worn and even rotting in places (cheap leather and sweat are not a good combination).

I got back a story about someone needing a new chair for medical reasons but they couldn't afford one.  I replied that the BASE was in good shape...but the chair upholstery was rotting.  They passed on picking it up after all.

++++++++++++++++++

I also posted a glass punch bowl with cups - I got a request to text someone on their cell phone who wants it because they could never afford  ::) a clear glass punch bowl with cups.... :o .

I can't do texting as we don't have that option on our cell phone plan.  Guess I can't get back in touch with them....
Title: Re: Craigslist query-- what's the norm?
Post by: miranova on July 27, 2013, 08:41:00 AM
Ignore the crazies.  People who don't bother actually reading the entire ad don't deserve a response.

We have delivered things for an additional fee at times, but we have access to a trailer and a vehicle capable of towing said trailer, so it made sense for us to do it because hey, we got our stuff sold that way, and the delivery fee was fair.  However I would never deliver anything without someone nicely offering a delivery fee first.  If someone just TOLD me to deliver it, especially without realizing that this costs ME labor, time, and money and not offering to compensate for that, I'm not dealing with them anymore.  That kind of entitlement just tells me that I'm going to show up and they won't be there, or will have changed their mind, or want $50 knocked off the price for this or that.  People who feel entitled to free delivery of used items from a random stranger aren't going to be reasonable people.

We've had some great experiences buying and selling on CL, but we just ignore people who refuse to read the ad completely or become totally wishy washy or ask too many inane questions.  It's a used item people.  There is some degree of risk in that.  If you want something new and perfect, go buy it new.

It never ceases to amaze me what will sell quickly and what doesn't.  I am shocked that we quickly sold two used cheap twin mattresses.  I thought we'd never sell those.  Yet we are having a hard time selling our old living room furniture that doesn't have any damage at all.  I don't like the set, hence why we got a new one, so maybe no one else likes it either...but i can just never predict what will sell.  I thought for sure we'd sell those couches before used mattresses!  And someone even bought the world's ugliest kitchen cabinets when we tore them out and redid our kitchen.  I told my husband he was crazy for thinking anyone would want them. They were gone in 2 days.  I find it all very fascinating.