Etiquette Hell

Hostesses With The Mostest => Entertaining and Hospitality => Topic started by: AprilRenee on March 31, 2007, 01:26:10 AM

Title: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: AprilRenee on March 31, 2007, 01:26:10 AM
Ok, I'll admit, I like hearing about your worst house guest stories. So what is your WORST one (if it's already posted, link me!)

I don't have alot of houseguest stories, simply because I never have the room to have someone stay with me for an extended period of time. Once though, quite awhile back I was living CRIVINS! my husband and daughter in a one bedroom apartment. It had this HUGE closet that actually fit a crib and a dresser along with some shelves so that was my daughters room, until she was slightly over a year old.

Anyhow, i had had a friend that was pregnant the same time I was and her baby is only slightly older than my own. She was going through some hard times and asked if she could stay with us for two or three days Since she had a baby I was hard pressed to say no. I had been asked several times before by different people and had always said no. I talked this over with my husband and we decided that she could stay with us for a couple days only, since we literally did not have room for another body, let alone two.

The first night she is over she commandeers my daughters crib for her child, since "She can sleep in your bed". Apparently her child slept so cute that she had to use MY camera to take 15 pictures of him sleeping (this was film, BTW)

The second night, and the third night, she is going to run out and get groceries (she had offered to help pick up a few things for us while she was there, those were LEAN days) yet she doesn't come back. She leaves her child with us and went out partying until the wee hours of the morning. She didn't have a key to the apartment so she had to bang on the door and wake us up to get in. We sat her down and said we have a "curfew" of 11 PM because we can't leave the door unlocked all night and we didn't want to wake up whenever she got home. She was also told that we don't mind watching the baby but she needs to ASK and be upfront about where she is. She asks to stay with us a couple more days. I agree because i didn't want to throw her out of the house.

Things (predictably) get worse. She is unhappy with the curfew we imposed on her. She takes my daughter out of her swing where she is sleeping to put her child in it. She starts "borrowing" our diapers and baby food.

A week later, my husband and I tell her she needs to find another place to stay, that things are too crowded and we cannot afford to keep feeding her and supplying her with diapers and baby food. She gets angry, states she DID buy groceries and calls another friend. The groceries and replacement diapers never appear.

BUT before she left she DID steal all of my baby spoons and about half the bottles I had for my daughter.

Oh, and the groceries she bought? A gallon of ice cream that she generously shared.
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: IndianInlaw on March 31, 2007, 06:49:05 AM
Does Princess Pantene count as a houseguest?


I rarely have houseguests, since I am antisocial, but this happened to my poor mother.

GROSSNESS ALERT! :o

My cousin (about 48 yrs at the time) went to stay with her for a while.   She is a slob extraordinaire, no lie. 

I have blocked out most of the details, but when she left, my mom found used Tampax stuffed down the heating registers.

WHO DOES THAT? :o
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: Twik on April 01, 2007, 07:53:10 AM
GROSSNESS ALERT! :o

My cousin (about 48 yrs at the time) went to stay with her for a while.   She is a slob extraordinaire, no lie. 

I have blocked out most of the details, but when she left, my mom found used Tampax stuffed down the heating registers.

WHO DOES THAT? :o

At 48? She hasn't figured out how to dispose of things like that?

I can't imagine that's stupidity. There must be malice there.
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: sammycat on April 01, 2007, 10:55:00 PM
Thankfully I haven't (yet) had a houseguest that was from hell, but this story did happen to a friend of mine about 10 years ago.

My friend "Liz" had emigrated to this country and was contacted by an old friend (MiserWoman) of hers from the original country, inviting herself to stay with Liz.  Liz happily agreed and warmly welcomed her friend to her home.

Liz was on fixed income (she was in her late 50s at this stage), and lived in a small but very nice 1 bedroom unit.  MiserWoman, on the other hand, had a large disposable income and was quite free with her money - on herself.  She stayed with Liz for 10 days, never once offered to pay for groceries or contribute towards household expenses, never offered to pay for either herself or Liz when they went out, and commandeered the bedroom during her stay. She stood back and allowed/waited for Liz to pay for everything - bus fares, meals, entry fees etc.  She did, however, buy herself expensive souvenirs, jewellery and clothes during her stay.  She also never offered to help with the cooking, cleaning etc. 

I was flabbergasted when Liz told me this story shortly after the "friend" (leech) left.  She couldn't explain why she allowed this to happen.  She doesn't like to offend people but she's not normally a doormat either.  The only thing Liz could put it down to was that MiserWoman thought that the host should pay for everything, and that if she went to visit MiserWoman then MiserWoman would pay for everything.  Liz never had a chance to find out though as she never heard from MiserWoman ever again.

I can feel myself getting het up over this and it didn't even happen to me!
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: Redhead on April 02, 2007, 06:39:06 AM
Our last houseguest wasn't from hell - but certainly from heck at least : )

Probably best described in the letter I would have liked to write >:D

Dear Houseguest

Thankyou for your recent visit.  Just a couple of things I would like to mention before you impose... er visit us again.

I realise that due to the short notice of you coming to stay we didn't get to chat much before your visit.  And perhaps you didn't really understand what I meant when I asked what you like to eat or if there is something you don't like/eat.  A reply of "anything" tends to give me the impression you will actually eat "anything".  So the gluten free and soy product demands requests did come as a bit of shock when you mentioned them on the morning you arrived after I had gone shopping and menu planned.

I don't expect you to help cook or clean on a 3 day visit, but the occasional offer to clear dishes or the like would have been nice - rather than you plopping down on the couch after dinner and asking for dessert while playing with the TV channels.

Its nice you missed your friends when you were in town.  Perhaps next time though you could get them to call before 1am and then you wont be interupted when we bang on the door after half an hour of giggling.

I have a perfectly functioning laundry and bathroom towel racks.  It is appreciated if wet towels could go to one of these two places rather than hung over my canvas lamp for 2 days.

I do appreciate that you smoked outside,  however could you please shut the front door if you are going to lean on the screen door to smoke, especially when those were definitely NOT umm store bought cigarettes.

Oh and in regards to your comment about staying with us for longer while you look for a place to stay when you come up here for work later this year...we have turned the spare room into an recreation room and as such we regret that we just don't seem to have a place for you to crash.  I can recommend a number of hotels and realestate services though.

Regards

Redhead.
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: Bob Ducca on April 02, 2007, 09:31:53 AM
I think the worst was a family who stayed with us for about a week.  (Originally supposed to be three days, then four, then six).  Daughters were 17 months and 4 years.  Husband did his best to take care of them.  Mom woke up no earlier than 1 pm the entire visit, then got snippy when I wanted to go to bed (with my 3 month old) at 8 pm.  Anything we planned was rejected out of hand and replaced with activities she wanted, and then she got snippy that I didn't want my 3 month old outside in the sun all day (and I was still breast-feeding, and do not do it in public).

Her thank-you note expressed her regret that I didn't spend more time with them.

Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: kathrynne on April 02, 2007, 10:17:07 AM
I've actually had one guest who was worse than MIL and SIL, each of whom moved in (the former for one month, the latter for eight) and had to be kicked out.

The other guest didn't actually stay.

It was the summer following my sophomore year of college. I was working at a chicken joint (not the one Pamela Anderson dislikes. I've worked with two different chains) and the manager of another store had fired his whole staff two months earlier, and still hadn't hired many people to replace them all. So I was working a full 40 hours at each store--my own and the other store--each week. This left no time to clean my apartment, but it also left me no time to mess it up. My roommate handled the messing up and ignored the idea of cleaning.

My "best friend" from junior high and high school called to say she was coming for a visit. She left the message with my roommate, including the date and time to expect her (arriving on a Friday). I did manage to call and verify this before arranging several days off work--including one full day (Thursday) before her arrival to clean the small apartment, knowing my roomie would never lift a finger. We also discussed the hours I was working, so it's not like anything that happened next should have surprised her.

Wednesday night I arrived home from work (actually 3 a.m. Thursday) to see a note from my roomie that "Jay" would be arriving at 11 a.m. Thursday instead of Friday. My plan had been to crash and sleep until about noon, before getting up to clean for company. I'd hoped to have two good nights' sleep and a clean apartment for this "friend" of 12 years. Instead, I faced the choice of cleaning or sleeping--while my roomie slept in the next room. I opted to sleep a few hours and left a note for roomie to wake me before leaving for work--at 7.

I actually managed to get the livingroom/kitchen picked up before my "friend" arrived--at NINE. It wasn't clean by anyone's standards, but she was a full 26 hours early and I was mainlining strong coffee with one hand.

She walked in, accepted my greeting and hug, then looked around and said, "Ugh. This is disgusting. I can't stay here, even for one more minute." She then turned around and left. To say I was flabbergasted would be a huge understatement. That was 1980, and we haven't spoken since. I ran into her sister once a few years later, and she apologized for Jay's nastiness.

I guess I should've expected this sort of consideration from her, though. I'd told her the previous year that she could visit anytime except Final Exam Week, and that's exactly when she showed up. With no money for food, and complaining that I actually needed time to study for exams.
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: Buffy2424 on April 02, 2007, 11:06:06 AM
These are horrible.  I share the sentiment that fish and houseguests stink after 3 days... or earlier. 

My stories aren't as bad, but I have a kinda funny, bizarre one.  Long, but it's a good story:

My in-laws live 3 big states away, and we only see them about twice a year (when we visit "the hometown" and see everyone).  So last summer we were glad when SIL and her boyfriend decided to come up for a weekend and visit us. 

Except they didn't so much visit us.  Mostly they hid around the house and made out.  Went out on the back porch to make out.  Holed up in our spare bedroom to make out.   

They were 22 and 23 years old at the time, but they're young for their ages, live with their respective parents, etc.  They announced to us that it was their first "overnight" together.  I was feeling weird about that, like I was an accomplice to juvenile delinquency.  And my MIL kept calling on the phone to ask in detail about what they were doing.  ???  A big part of coming all the way out to visit us was to spend alone time with each other. 

They also played a rough game of tag (among other things) in the small house we rent, and I had to ask them to stop before they knock the bookshelves loose.  Stuff was flying, cats hiding, etc.  I don't like feeling like the strict stepmom or something when we are practically the same age.  I hate to have to say something (re: the tough tag), but even when MIL is with them she just laughs at how cute they are, like they're rowdy puppies.

And as I said on another thread, they don't exactly eat meals and such, so that was weird too.  SIL basically is allergic to most all but 3 things.  SIL's BF was a hearty, boyish eater when we first met him but has become increasingly food phobic; now his eating habits resemble hers.  So while they were here DH and I ate from our cheese & crackers/fruit platters, ate nice dinners, drank wine, etc etc while they picked at white bread and water that they brought with them.  (This isn't abnormal for them, though I had wondered if that would be different when away from MIL).

The one time they did eat was when I made a salad, corn on the cob and burgers on the BBQ.  SIL's BF ate a burger by itself and SIL took everything out of the salad and had some lettuce. 

By the way, I am just relating an amusing story, not complaining about their eating habits (no, really).  I wasn't put out -- in fact, they are inexpensive houseguests, very easy in that way.  I make things that I suspect they may decide to eat, but I know how it is and don't take it personally. 

Back to the rude parts:  SIL's BF criticized our apparent lack of stuff.  He wanted to know why we didn't have an office.  Well, it's a 1,000 sq ft house.  That phone over there?  Is our office.  And he wanted to know why we didn't have a kitchen clock.  He kept saying that DH and I didn't have as much stuff as he did, because "We have an X room, or X products."  He lives with his parents.  Yeah, my daddy has an office too. 

Also, when they went through our fridge like it was a museum, taking out things and exclaiming over them.  I guess it held ultra-exotic fixings or something.  At one point, SIL's BF took out something and said, "Did you buy this in America??" like it was freaky.  It was some frozen veggie thing that I probably bought at Food Lion.  I mean, really now.

Oh, and then there was the afternoon when the BF seemed to be communicating with one of our cats.  I asked him if he liked cats, and he said, "No! I was just looking at it." 

What??  When I finally got my speaking voice back, I tried to clarify that I was wondering if he was a cat or a dog person? But he was all flustered and insisting that "it was a logical conclusion" or whatever.  (What conclusion?)

Anyway, he went on an on, but I tried to explain that I wasn't accusing him of molesting the cat or whatever, but you know what -- I think I'll just keep him away from my pets.  That was weirding me out big-time.

At the end of the visit, they suggested that they stay all week and play house while we're getting work done.  Um, no. 

Though to his credit, SIL's BF actually thanked me on their way out.  I have to admit that it again took me a moment to find my voice.  Those two used to be a lot ruder, but they're getting increasingly well-mannered, in my opinion.  We've visited with them twice since then, and noticed a change.
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: aline on April 02, 2007, 11:21:37 AM
A little background. MIL and FIL love to travel and fly somewhere different (within the US) every weekend. We joke that because we now live by a major airport (1500 miles from their home), we see them way more often than we did when we lived 40 minutes away by car. Her visits are always entertaining, to say the least, but the worst visit would have to be about a year ago, right after my husband and I bought our first house.

Here are some of the outtakes from the visit:

- They brought my grandmother-in-law without telling us. Now, we adore Grandma, but we were not prepared for an extra guest, and had nowhere to put her.

- They treated our house like a hotel. Left their wet towels and dishes everywhere, and made a general mess of everything. Cleaning the bathroom up after they left was a very unpleasant job. I won't go into any more detail than that. I spent most of the time cleaning up after them.

- They're difficult to cook for, because they like to eat everything my husband or I can't eat (he has cholesterol problems), and complain when I try to find a healthier compromise, or if I don't happen to have something specific they wanted in the fridge or the pantry.

- The first night I made dinner, MIL offered to help prepare. As soon as I took her up on it, she said she didn't want to mess up her manicure.

- They took us out to dinner at a nearby restaurant that they chose, and complained loudly throughout the entire meal. MIL decided to ask me at the top of her lungs whether or not I have my nipples pierced.  ??? Several people in the restaurant turned around a stared at me in disgust. Being a bit shy in large groups, I was mortified. When the bill came, we had to split it with them because it was too much. I'm always happy to split the bill, but they told us they were taking us out to dinner to say thank you for letting them stay with us. The grand total was $50, with tip, for 5 people. Not exactly unreasonable.

-  MIL has allergies. We have a dog. When we know she's coming to visit, we deep clean the entire house, and block off the part of the house they will be staying in so that the dog won't be in that area, and provide an ionic air purifier for their room to try and help. She complained the entire time about her allergies, and how I must be a terrible housekeeper, but refused to take any of her allergy medication because she "didn't want to".  Probably not my finest moment, but I politely told her I'd be happy to take her to the nearest hotel.

- The kicker was their attitude towards the new house. They made disparaging comments about every little thing, the fixtures, doors, the paint, etc, knowing that we were excited about our first home. For the most part, I just ignored it, but felt bad for my poor husband. We later found out that they were annoyed, because our house is slightly bigger than theirs.  ::)
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: IndianInlaw on April 03, 2007, 09:06:02 AM
Twik, my cousin is just plain nuts.   I could write a book about why I won't speak to her.


My mom is only nice to her out of respect for my late aunt, who was my mom's sister.

I'm not that nice.
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: Pixie on April 03, 2007, 05:18:08 PM
Worst?  My late Mother's husband, "Ken".  He stayed with us for a week after Mom died.  I never liked him, I HATED the way he treated my Mom, (he treated her like a replacement part for his late wife) but I never let on that I couldn't stand him as that would be rude, and I didn't want to hurt Mom.  However he totally and completely irritated me when Mom died. 

 1. He never spent any time with her in the hospital, he said he had "been there, done that" when his first wife died.
2.  He gave away many family "treasures" to the neighbor lady across the street. (Who he moved in with 3 months later)

3. When it came time to fill out the death certificate he didn't know: Mom's maiden name, birth-date, where she was born, how many children she had, her middle name, or if she had siblings.  They were married 10 years.... and he didn't know the smallest detail about her.   He kept trying to give the funeral director his FIRST wife's information.... the Funeral director just talked to me.

But back to his visit:   He was rude.  He ate everything in the house and never lifted a finger to help, not even the day  Mom died when I was busy on the phone notifying family.   He broke several sentimental items in my home, with NO apology.  He CHAIN-SMOKED in my non-smoking home!   I smoke, but I do not smoke in my house!   If I could go outside, so could he.... Hubby finally put his foot down.
He brought his spoiled little dog who was in heat and let her bleed all over my white comforter, she also went potty on my new carpet.   Oh and chased my 3 cats including my 19 year old cat who had AIDS!

All of that I could have forgiven, if he had not come into my office as I was writing Mom's obituary the morning after her death to tell me how long it had been since he and Mom had had sex, and rubbed my leg!    I tossed him out of my office, told my brother (who had also spent the night) and my husband, and was never alone with "Ken" again.

I have not spoken to him since the memorial service, and I have no intention of ever speaking to him again.

.


Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: aline on April 03, 2007, 05:38:12 PM
 :o :o :o

Pixie that's horrible. I hope you never have to see that rotten man again.
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: kathrynne on April 03, 2007, 06:38:46 PM
Oh, Pixie, that really is awful.

Unfortunately, you've reminded me of yet another rude one.

My mother's stepmother (Aunt G) did not come out for my Dad's funeral when he died. Not a problem, she lived about 1,200 miles away and not everyone can travel on short notice. Instead she visited about a month later.

Dad had been disabled and in a wheelchair or electric Scoota for 10 full years. We had a Stair-Glide to take Dad up to his own bedroom at night, and ramps in the family room and garage of this colonial (one step up here, a step down there) house so Dad could get from one room to another.

We picked Aunt G up from the airport and as she walked up the garage ramp she was shaking her head. When she stepped into the family room she exclaimed loudly, "I thought you'd be rid of these things by now!" She was talking about the wheelchair ramps, but she wasn't any happier to see we hadn't just ripped the Stair-Glide out of the wall five minutes after burying my Dad.

Ever change the levels of something in your home after getting used to the way things are? Miscount the number of stairs as you're going up or down in the dark? It's embarrassing and can hurt.

Wheelchair ramps are tricky for those not in wheelchairs. If you approach the ramp from the side you have to remember to lift one foot higher to clear the angle, and Mom actually broke her pinkie toe several times because she forgot to do this and smashed it into the ramp.

But if you're used to the gradual slope of a ramp instead of the full riser of a stair, the mere thought of removing the ramp is pretty scary. Especially in a family full of clutzes who can trip over our own tiny feet. When we finally did take the ramps out, every person familiar with that house tripped multiple times. We'd lived there more than 20 years, but half that time there wasn't a step. It didn't belong.

The Stair-Glide, btw, stayed until it died.

Aunt G is still alive, but has not been back.
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: Gyro Widget on April 03, 2007, 08:03:15 PM
My worst house guest story?

Back in one of my early university years, I had an apartment with my sister.  Well a friend came over and brought a couple of her friends.  One of the other girls I knew somewhat, but she was only an aquaintance.  I had hung around with a group of friends where she was on a couple occasions, but really, all I knew was that this girl went to my University and still lived at home with her parents.

Anyways, when it became late, most of the group got rides home in taxis, but this one girl lived waaaaaaaaaay on the opposite side of town from everybody else.  She tried to call her parents but could not get them on the phone, nor did she have any money for a cab.  Myself being a broke 17 year old as well, didnt feel like handing over someone $30 for a cab so I told her she could crash on the sofa until her parents were awake in the morning.

Well I went to bed, exhausted, and she came into my room and sat on my bed.  I was then subjected to what seemed like a pet cat trying to meow its owner awake for the next few hours.  She kept saying "I'm BOOOOOOOOORED"...  "Lets go out an DO something", "I'm SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO bored!!!!!!".  This went on into the wee hours of the night, with me nearly crying, telling her to shut up and to please go out on the couch. 

At one point I wanted to cry because I was so tired.  Here was this girl who I was not even really friends with, and who I barely knew, whining like a stray animal "Waaaaake UPPPPPP..... I'm BOOOOOOOOOOOOOORED..... GET UP!!!!!!!".  Meanwhile, this was, oh, 4am!!!!

I should have given her cab money right then and there, but like I said, as a broke univeristy student, I couldn't afford to pay my rent half of the time even.  Looking back at it now, I suppose I could have driven her outside of the apartment to walk home, but that would have been cruel considering the rape crimes that go on in that town.   

I basically spent the night sitting up on my bed, nodding off, with nothing but her occasional pleas of "I'm booooooored".  Its not like I was even conversing with her.  I wonder now if she was actually mentally ill or something. 

Finally around 7 or 8am, after being kept up ALL night... I got her to call ANYBODY who could pick her up... and I think a relative or someone came to get her.  It was almost like she was a neglected child... well, if you could call an 18 year old a child. 

I then went back to bed, and finally fell asleep.  That group of friends were NEVER invited back to my home again.  I'll never forget though, how a near stranger kept me up all night whining "I'm SOOoOoOooooOOOooooo bored!!!!"

Maybe I'm just silly for even remembering something from so long ago, but then again, my mother taught me that when you are a guest in someone's home, you follow their lead - that includes going to sleep when they do. 


....One of the many reasons why, with the exception of my parents and my future in laws, I refuse to have houseguests, or stay with other people...
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: magdalena on April 04, 2007, 02:55:01 AM
My brother, whom I adore, his wife and kids spent a little over a week with us.

My SIL drove me nuts.

Now, the whole family has quite a few food restrictions put together, so cooking for them is by no means easy. I'd been preparing, planning and fretting for almost a week before they came and had the feeling I had found quite a good solution.

The first evening I got out the bread without yeast/white flour/sugar for her, the eggless rolls for my nephew and the milkfree things for my brother. SIL looked at me aghast and asked why I didn't have any lactose-free yoghurt (really hard to find where I live), butter milk for niece or organic milk for nephew. My brother told her I probably didn't have all that much space in my little fridge and reminded her that they hadn't mentioned those things to me when asked about preferences. (There was plenty for all to eat, just not necessarily the stuff they have at home. The kids seemed happy and ate a lot).

The second day she wanted to go grocery shopping. Got the things she thought were missing (exept for the yoghurt that she finally believed was hard to find) and did not once offer to pay. (when we got back my brother asked what things had cost and gave me money to cover it)
While shopping, I asked her what the kids might like to eat. Her answer was: "I always wanted to try fresh asparagus, lets get that".
The kids didn't like it.
My brother helped me around the kitchen as he knew I wasn't used to cooking for 6 people all the time. He also came up with fast and easy things the kids enjoy and we could all eat on the other evenings, without having to make three or four different meals.

By the end of the week the appartment didn't look all that tidy anymore. We'd given them our bedroom and were crashing in the livingroom ourselves, which was a little cluttered due to that. I'd been showing them around all week. As we got home from another day full of sights, museums and other places where I'd acted as a tour guide (she wanted to trace the route we walked on her map so I had to keep showing her the exact streets) and interpreter, she followed me into the kitchen and watched me bake an eggless cake and cook (my brother was out with the kids) another dinner, all of a sudden she asked me:
"So, what are you gonna do when you have a baby?"
Me: "Why? What do you mean?"
SIL: "Well, look at the floor! There's flour all-over and it really should be cleaned!"
Kids and my brother came in that instant, and my brother must've seen the look on my face and heard his wife's comment.
He came to me and said: "Well, sis isn't pregnant yet - and I'd think when she has a little one she'll sweep the floors more often, if she thinks that's necessary, and she won't have guests over for a week!"

They were no guests from hell, just quite tiring. I'll invite them over again. Just not right now  ;D
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: retreadbride on April 04, 2007, 12:22:59 PM
Invited a former roommate for a holiday. She brought her NEW roommate and said she thought it would be rude to leave the New Roomie alone on the holiday.

Evidently it wasn't rude to bring her along to my house, unnanounced, and expect me to feed and entertain her all week.

Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: Minmom3 on April 04, 2007, 03:18:03 PM
<<"Waaaaake UPPPPPP..... I'm BOOOOOOOOOOOOOORED..... GET UP!!!!!!!". >>

I remember things similar to this when my children were young.  My final line, which for some reason ALWAYS worked, was said through slitted eyes and gritted teeth, "I DON'T CARE if you can't sleep.  Get in your bed, pull up the covers and pretend.  Do not get out of that bed unless you need to pee, and once you have peed, you get right back in that bed, and don't go anywhere else BUT your bed.  If you wake me up again I will beat you!"

An 18 year old behaving like that?  Good lord.  I'd have told her to turn on the TV and (Oo, I just used a rude phrase that the moderators won't be happy about. ) and leave ME to sleep.  I'd agree with the person who said it sounded like possible brain damage, because it's certainly not normal to act that way.  Not once you're over the age of, oh, 7.

My nearly 18yo DD sometimes can't sleep.  Then she either reads a book or stays up late online, being very quite about it so as not to disturb US....  Headphones are her friend!
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: AprilRenee on April 04, 2007, 03:27:07 PM


I remember things similar to this when my children were young.  My final line, which for some reason ALWAYS worked, was said through slitted eyes and gritted teeth, "I DON'T CARE if you can't sleep.  Get in your bed, pull up the covers and pretend.  Do not get out of that bed unless you need to pee, and once you have peed, you get right back in that bed, and don't go anywhere else BUT your bed.  If you wake me up again I will beat you!"



Haha I said that EXACT thing this morning. Unfortunatly my children never believe my beating threats.
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: minnaloushe on April 04, 2007, 03:37:11 PM
My worst houseguest would be the friend that needed a place to stay for a short while and ended up sleeping on my couch for three months. 

He was a computer guy, and set up his business in the dining room, effectively stopping us from eating at the table.  But that was okay, because he was used to eating at the computer anyway.

He also commandeered our phone so he could work (i.e. set up an internet connection), except he didn’t ask, and would get very angry if a call came through and broke the connection.  He actually convinced the phone company to cancel the call alert so he wouldn’t be interrupted. He also yelled at a friend for daring to call when we weren’t home.

Finally, he didn’t contribute anything to the household.  He wasn’t a “guest” in the sense that we invited him to visit, he begged for a place to stay because he hadn’t found an apartment and his old place was demolished. We didn’t want to put any undue financial strain on him as he was saving for an apartment, but it soon became evident he wasn’t looking for anything, and always seemed to have money for Starbucks and smokes, but nothing for food, TP, etc. basically anything we had to provide anyway. He didn’t eat much of our food unless I was making dinner (which I do all the time) but he never once offered to grocery shop, do laundry, tidy up or actually leave the apartment so DH and I could have an hour of privacy. I don’t think he’s been back to more than twice in the ten years since, as DH is still miffed.

At a much later date we had another friend in a similar sticky situation, but the results were completely the opposite.  This gentleman was considerate, clean, and helpful.  He was also there for three months, but we’d have him back in a heartbeat.
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: kathrynne on April 04, 2007, 03:39:45 PM
My nearly 18yo DD sometimes can't sleep.  Then she either reads a book or stays up late online, being very quite about it so as not to disturb US....  Headphones are her friend!
I learned insomnia etiquette when I was very young, having been a chronic insomniac all my life. It runs in the family, so it wasn't unusual to quietly go downstairs and discover Dad there watching whatever was on the "Late, Late Show." Those are actually some of my best childhood memories.

Dad and I would watch bad movies ("Night of the Lepus," anyone?) and play poker or 21 until the test patterns came on, and then try the bed again. If Dad was lucky enough to sleep when I couldn't, I'd just read or watch bad movies.

Insomniacs value sleep. Most of us know better than to "share" the affliction, but I've known a few people who needed educating on the topic.
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: Jaywalker on April 04, 2007, 08:28:07 PM
re the SIL/brother from hell --- my FOO lived in a tiny tiny two bedroom house when I was small and my mother's huge extended family loved to come and crash -- we would have as many as 26 people stacked up like cordwood for Thanksgiving -- her father moved in for 6  mos before I was born and was angry when my mother indicated that she would be needing the room for her baby -- uncles and their families stayed all summer while uncles went to college on the GI bill etc etc --

there were always moochers parked on the floors the couch (in the one bathroom) etc -- my mother the perennial doormat had one sensible rule though -- she would not put her husband out of his bed for guests (and of course she got to stay in it with him) -- she felt that the guy who had to get up and work to support whatever moochers were sacked out in the living room should not have to sleep on floor or couch ---

I having been brought up with this 'standard' have never given my bed and my husband's bed up to a guest -- We tried to have a decent guest bed -- but kept ours

it is crazy making enough to have guests for days at a time, without having to live like a nomad in your own home

and you are less likely to have long term guests with this policy

time to buy an inflatable air bed for SIL/brother  or a futon
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: loopey2u on April 04, 2007, 09:27:15 PM
Or you can pay for a hotel room if you can afford it, which is what I'm considering next time my IL's come to visit.  If they're offended, they can stay home. 
We plan on having something going on next time somebody invites themselves over unless it's MIL and she comes by herself. We've had a lot of houseguests the past 4 years and we're tired of them. 

Background.  We live 4 hours away from all family, so a day visit is just not feasable unless it is an emergency. We do go back home a lot, so it's not like we don't see anybody.  We were just home in November, December, January and February.  Next time we plan on going will be at the end of May for my sisters surprise 30th birthday party.

I will say that sometimes we do stay with family members, but we always clean up after ourselves, and make sure we're not a burden on the hosting family as far as food/entertainment.  One night's stay is the max for us at another persons house.  Any more than that, and fights/resentsments happen.  They just do.
 
We stoppped inviting people (i.e. the PITB people) to come to our place for the weekend last year.  It just became too much for us all.  People were using our place as a vacation to "get away", and we were stuck with all the work while they were here and after they left.

IL's are nice people and I like them, but they're slobs.  When they come I'm expected to just let my house go, which I don't do.  That's something I don't budge on because a messy house makes me very uncomfortable. (OCD)  They have known this for at least 15 years now, but make no pains to ensure my comfort, although when they come I'm supposed to drop everything.

On one visit nephew was being potty trained, and he pooped on my family room rug left a milk bottle to drip for hours inside my sectional.  Then they hung his underpants on the railings of the stairs after they were washed.  Everybody else thought it was funny.  I was disgusted, and cleaned the carpets and sectional as soon as they left.  The sectioanl still stinks to this day, and I wish we had the money to replace it.

IL's never offer to cook or take us out for a meal, and generally make themselves at home sleeping in our family room until noon or later, making us prisoners in our own home as we have to tiptoe around the sleepers until they wake up.  (This after I offer them a bedroom that has internet access and cable tv).  They also stay for days, not just one night because "only one night is not worth coming out"

Apparently the cost of gas is so high, they complain the whole time they are here about how much it cost them to come out, and generally make us feel uncomfortable and responsible for feeding them breakfast lunch and dinner.

I could go on and on and on, but I won't.

People, don't let yourselves be taken advantage of by rude houseguests.  Show them the door or show them a hotel room, even if you have to pay for it.  Better yet, don't open yourselves up to the situation in the first place.
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: dustyninja on April 04, 2007, 10:40:21 PM
Oh my!! Reading all these stories reminds of houseguests my family had about 15 years ago. I blocked out most of the details.The ones I do remember are detailed below.

Guests call us in January. Asked if we had any plans for July 4th week. "nope" Told us that they MAY be in our area around that time and could they come see us.  Ok sure my mom hadn't seen this "friend" in about 25 years and had limited correspondence. Plus they lived over 500 miles away.  She said just let us know when your plans are final. (she thought it would be nice to catch up with her friend.)

Nothing is heard during the following months until....7am July 4th, our doorbell rings. It is the guests from Hades. Mom, dad and two kids under 10. 

The kids mom expected me and my sister to play with her kids. I was 18 and my sis was 15.  ???

My mom asked what they liked to eat and they told her what they liked, so us being good hosts go to the store, along with the guest mom. Proceed to buy $400.00 worth of groceries of what THEY liked. When we got home and tried to prepare what they liked, it was met with eww, and we don't like that. GRRRRR

Nope, they didn't reimburse us one penny. Not that that's bad, as they were guests, but how about a little gratitude? On the bright side we did have a fully stocked kitchen.

My sister was on the phone talking with a friend who was having a family crisis and my sis was trying to comfort her. The mom comes over presses the disconnect button and tells my sis that her kids want someone to play with them and she's been  elected.  Needless to say my sis was none to happy.

The kids have to sleep in my sis's room, my mom in my room with me on the floor and the other adults in my mom's room. (Not a problem)

Then my mom has to go out of town for the weekend with my aunt. She had made plans a month prior because she thought that our lovely guests, weren't going to come.  So me and my sis have to stay with our grandparents. As mom didn't want me and my sister to be around the husband. Do the guests leave when the weekend approaches? NO! They proceed to stay in our home and wreck my sisters video game system and other things. I threatend them to stay out of my room. Doubt they did though.

The husband kept leering at us and being otherwise creepy. The kids were constantly whining about one thing or another.

They didn't talk...they yelled constantly. Thank goodness for tylenol!

They finally leave after two weeks. I can understand the proverb that says, "like fish, guests stink after three days."

Since that incident I've made myself keenly aware of trespassing laws in my state.

(We got even though in a way. The husband and wife were coming through town about a year later and asked to stay with us. "SURE" (I should say when we came home they were in our driveway.)

We didn't clean the floor immaculately like we usually do and mom and me and sis refused to give up our rooms again, so they had to bed down on an air mattress in the living room. Then the three of us made light noises and scrapes along the wall during the night. They were gone early the next morning citing they heard "bugs". ) Not nice, but sure did relieve a lot of tension.
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: Rei-chan on April 05, 2007, 12:09:04 AM

Wow.  Just wow.  I have 2 stories to add to the mix....

Situation #1:

DH and I were moving home from 2 hours away.  A friend and her BF were coming up the night before to help out the day of the move.  We'll call them Looneytunes and NiceGuy, or LT and NG for short.   :)

Anyhow, they show up and aren't there for 1 hour when LT pulls out a pint of Seagram's 7, and proceeds to drink most of it.  NG has 1 or 2 light drinks.  We hang out, everything seems OK, and around midnight, I go to bed, leaving them watching TV on the sleeper sofa.

Around 4 am, I am awakened by my bedroom door being SLAMMED open.  It's LT.  Apparently, she had decided to rehash her failed marriage for the millionth time with NG.  From what I gathered in my rage, NG had told her that she was being drunk and maudlin, and that he wanted to sleep, which ticked her off.  They had argued, and he went outside to get some air.  I told her to calm down and go to bed. 

She proceeded to march back downstairs, out the front door, and unable to find NG, began running around the parking lot SCREAMING for him.  I race outside and bodily drag her back inside.  She goes through my stuff to find our cell (land line was already off) to call NG's mom (long distance) to tell her that LT was mad at her son.

At this point, I swear that I lost my mind.  I let her have it, took the phone away, and told her that if she didn't go to sleep right then, that I would call the cops. 

I found NG sleeping in their car, just to get some peace.

Situation #2:

A year later, another friend and her girlfriend were moving home from Atlanta.  We'll just call them EX and GF.  EX had come up to finalize their apartment (in our complex) and she was heading back to GA.  We were due to follow that weekend to help.  It was Valentine's Day, and the roads were slushy and wet.  I get a frantic call from EX.  She had blown a tire, hit some slush, spun into several 360 degree turns, and broken the back axle.  If not for the median, she would have been in 5 o'clock traffic on the highway.  DH and I head out to get her and make sure she is OK.

After calming her down, we start to head back to my place to make insurance calls, call GF, etc.  We also had plans to go out with friends for dinner, who were en route and not able to be reached.  When EX reaches GF, they decide (without consulting us) that EX would be staying with us for the rest of the week (5 days) and that we would bring her to Atlanta, as GF didn't want to make the drive to come get EX.  I was ticked at GF, but I felt bad for EX, so we went with it.

EX then wants us to cancel our plans to take her to visit with her Grandmother, who was 30 minutes from us, wait there for her, and then bring her back to our place.   >:(  I suggested to her then that if I took her down there, could she stay there for the week, and we would pick her up on the way down that weekend.  She declined, and went to dinner with us and our other friends, who had arrived by that point.

The week was spent with her hanging out around my place while DH and I were at work, bugging us to let her drive one of our cars so she could go shopping (Um, NO), and generally driving DH crazy while I was at work at night.  Keep in mind that this was her hometown:  she had numerous relatives that she could have asked for help, including her Mom. 

The end of the week brought the 6 hour drive to GA, packing a truck and driving back the same night.  We got separated on the highway, and when we got home, there was no sign of them.  My car was filled to the brim with their stuff, and although we waited till 5 am, we didn't hear a word from them.  We found out the next day that they had decided to stop at EX's Grandma's to sleep.  Apparently a call on the cell to let us know was too much for them to manage.   ???


Note that neither of these girls are my friends anymore, but the final straws for both are another Jerry Springer show.   >:D
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: Sophia on April 05, 2007, 09:19:16 AM
I having been brought up with this 'standard' have never given my bed and my husband's bed up to a guest -- We tried to have a decent guest bed -- but kept ours

I, too, believe in this rule.  I had to actually convince my parents of it.  In my case, I don't have a guest bed, so I happily sleep on the couch when my parents visit.  But, when my grandparents and other family visited my parents.  My parents vacated the Master bedroom, and Dad slept on a air mattress on the pool table.  It really hurt my parents when my grandparents complained about the bed and their private bathroom.  Especially since there was nothing to complain about.  The bed was very good quality and people could get lost in the bathroom. 
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: PeasNCues on April 05, 2007, 01:17:20 PM
Oh I have a couple stories:

--The first is my aunt. She loves to come over for the weekend and ends up staying several weeks. She has awful dogs who drool over my poor rabbit (who is used to romping with my golden retriever), poo in the house and bark incessantly. Any movement is often met with the statement "you're scaring my dogs".

--When my mother was 9 months pregnant with my little brother my aunt and uncle came to visit - unannounced. They stayed after the birth. My mom litterally had to tell them that she could not be a hostess and a brand new mother all at once and they had to leave.

--My great uncle was at our house for a barbecue (he knew us well but this was his first time at our house). He spent the entire time critiquing how my father cooked the meat (most of my fam eats their meat rare but he made burgers cooked to whatever the eater wanted) and telling us how ignorant and stupid we were not to share his political views (we have a no politics/no religion rule at our house and he was well aware of it as it was a rule shared by the whole family). Then he did something that got him kicked out of our house for good. We had a lovely old golden retriever. He was very arthritic and could only lie on one side otherwise he could not get up. In our family, dogs are like children - we love them and care from them as they are part of the family. Dog went to greet great uncle (limping in a great effort to see to doggie etiquette of greeting a guest) and sniffed his pants leg, wagging his tail (note - no aggressive or invasive behavior). Great uncle kicked him so hard he knocked the dog over - onto his bad side - and could it not get up. My father, who trains all of our animals, looked like he was about to murder uncle. I went outside, picked up the 80 pound animal and took him inside, ignoring great uncle's greeting and shooting him Death Glares (rude on my part but I was so angry I felt that any response I could give would be even more rude). I still have not forgiven him for that, though the dear old dog is dead and buried. In what culture is it ok to come in and abuse your hosts' pet? I understand that he might not have liked dogs, but he should have mentioned that before we welcomed him into our home or at least simply asked us to remove the animal from the room. He was informed by my father that any repeat of the incident would have him thrown out of the party. He has not been invited back to our home since.

Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: IndianInlaw on April 05, 2007, 01:35:04 PM
Relative or not, I would have had him arrested for animal cruelty.
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: Rei-chan on April 05, 2007, 04:26:30 PM

PeasNCues, I would have been on the evening news if someone had done that to one of our "children", and Great Uncle would have one less leg to kick poor defenseless animals like that......as well as several skull fractures from me beating him with said leg......

In that kind of situation, etiquette be da*ned. >:(
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: Suze on April 05, 2007, 05:12:06 PM
Nobody hurts my "babies" and lives to tell the tale.

I once wore a bruise for weeks protecting someone else's horse.

He was going to wap the horse for some horsey misdeed. (I think horse moved his foot when he "told" him to stand still)

He waped me instead.  Amazing how fast you can move when a "child" is threatened.  At least I saved the poor beast from one hit.
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: Esther_bunny on April 05, 2007, 07:07:28 PM
Dog went to greet great uncle (limping in a great effort to see to doggie etiquette of greeting a guest) and sniffed his pants leg, wagging his tail (note - no aggressive or invasive behavior). Great uncle kicked him so hard he knocked the dog over - onto his bad side - and could it not get up.


Oh no, I would've gone ballistic on that man! No, just no, no, no!
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: hollasa on April 06, 2007, 09:54:58 AM
Both my worst house-guest stories are about my MIL.

The first one was when she came up when DD#2 was 4 weeks old, DD#1 was 2.5, and we were packing up to move to a bigger house. She said she ought to fly back the first night (she does not travel well), and then she got sick... Seems to have been an inner ear infection, or Bell's Palsy, but she woke up in the evening and she couldn't move one side of her face. Rather than come tell me - I was nursing in the living room, while DH and DD#1 were asleep - she waited until the morning when DH was awake. We took her to the hospital, and she stayed there for a week. Then she came back and kept on getting worse - I would help her get up from her bed to the bathroom, think of things to make her she might eat, and otherwise help her out (DH was at work), and try to keep the toddler quiet (it was a very small house, and did I mention I'd just had a baby?). She went off at me this one time for not changing her sheets - well, she was never out of them, and she could just ask... Eventually we got her back to the  hospital, she stayed for two weeks, we moved, and then she came to the new house. Fortunately, she stayed until she could manage stairs, and the hospital did supply a home-care worker (I didn't have to tweeze her chin, thank goodness). She would come downstairs, and sit and glower in the living room while I fed her, fed the toddler, nursed the baby, tried to eat myself, unpacked some, and tried to finish a project that I'd accepted (self-employed). She held the baby once, made one "meal" (put cream cheese on a rice cake for the toddler), and told my mother that she was surprised I hadn't unpacked more of the house. Two weeks later, DH took time off work and flew back home with her. I arranged for a home care nurse, and help at the house. A few months after that she sent a long letter about what a bad mother I was, as my toddler had (gasp) a tantrum while she was there.

We invited her up again.

DH used the "be a better person" line.

She, my mother, and my brother came up for Christmas 2005. MIL stayed with my mother a night before the plane trip We moved the girls into our room, and put a grandma in each girl's room, next door to each other. MIL complained that she had to get out the wrong side of the bed to go to the bathroom.

Christmas eve, my mother heard loud mumbling coming from MIL's room at 4 or 5am. Knowing of the previous health problems, and being a nice person, she knocked on the door to find out if MIL was OK. MIL started "ranting" (my mom's word) at her, about how she and her clan had ruined my MIL's life and future, and how she had never liked me and I was raising her grandchildren all wrong and it was my mother's fault and on and on. She nearly hit my mother, and when my mother left the room she went after her to continue the rant. Eventually, this woke DH and I up, and DH went out to tell her not to go back to bed, and not ruin Christmas for the girls.

Fortunately, the girls didn't wake up, and we basically separated the rest of the stay - MIL and DH by the fireplace in the family room, and the rest of us in the living room. DD#1 was sitting at MIL's feet at one point, and admired her necklace, and MIL said it was a family heirloom, it had come to her, and it ought to go to DD#1 as the first child of her first child - but it wouldn't, because DD#1 didn't have MIL's birth last name (she has her father's last name, the last name of the man MIL married). "Do you like it?", MIL said. DD#1 said no. Fortunately, I'd prepared the children by saying that MIL was rather old, and not well, and she gets a bit cranky sometimes especially when it's noisy, "but grandma still loves you, of course."

MIL and my mother flew back in the same plane, but different seats. My mother didn't sit by MIL in the waiting room, which caused MIL to rant a bit more at her in public. She also called a lady who asked her for advice on flying "common". We had called MIL's cousin, who MIL was going to stay with after staying with my mother for a few days, and she met MIL at the airport and took her home. She quite understood, as she had stopped talking to MIL for 10 years sometime previously. My mother has not talked to her since.

In deference to my husband, we stayed with MIL for 3 days last summer, but it was about 2.5 days too long. We are not doing that again.
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: dings on April 06, 2007, 10:10:50 AM
All I know is, when it comes to houseguests, there seems to be a language barrier.  Because with my houseguests, "one week" or "two weeks" seems to actually mean one or two or six months.  Always. It's odd... ;)
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: Shoo on April 06, 2007, 10:22:16 AM
We have had houseguests for the past month.  The Other Mom and her two dd's I've written often about here.

We originally agreed that they could stay with us until their new house became available on April 5th.  About mid-way through March, Other Mom decided she didn't really want to move into that particular house after all, so she started looking for a different house.  Of course, the only houses she qualified for and liked were not available until later in April, or the end of April.

She asked if they could stay for the month of April.  We sat down with her and told her we were able to accomodate her only until April 5th, which was our original agreement.  Beyond that, she would have to find something else.  We were polite, calm, and united.  She took it rather well.

So they left yesterday.  It would have been easy to give in, out of guilt, out of concern for her kids, out of some sort of desire to do for her what her own family didn't seem to want to do, whatever.  But we didn't relent, and we didn't waiver.  When she would talk about how hard it was trying to find accomodations, etc. I would listen intently, then change the subject.  I refused to get drawn in.  It seemed to work.

Our house is our own again.  I wish her well, but I was glad to see her go.
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: dings on April 06, 2007, 10:32:30 AM
Ooh, I just thought of one, but it is in reverse.  I had made plans to go visit a friend in Arizona for a week.  I lived in Northern California, and I was going to drive, by myself.  Probably a bad idea, but I was going through some rough times and I thought it would give me time to think and help clear my head.  So, I took the week off from work, got all ready, and about 2 days before I was about to leave, gave my friend a call.  Her roomate answered.  I asked for my friend. "No, she's out of town right now."  Really.  Do you know when she'll be back?  "About two weeks.  She's driving around Colorado with her boyfriend.  They just sort of left out of the blue."  Oh.  Okay.  Well gee, I am so glad I called.  When my friend got back, she was sooooooo sorry.  Turns out she just "spaced it." 
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: caranfin on April 06, 2007, 01:41:22 PM
IL's never offer to cook or take us out for a meal, and generally make themselves at home sleeping in our family room until noon or later, making us prisoners in our own home as we have to tiptoe around the sleepers until they wake up. 

No, you don't have to. You choose to. No law of etiquette or common sense says you have to tiptoe around people who choose to sleep in your family room after turning down a private bedroom. Go ahead and live your life while they're there. Maybe they'll decide sleeping in the family room isn't such a good idea after all.
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: Joannie81 on April 07, 2007, 01:01:33 PM
We don't have many houseguests, but my brothers gf stayed with us once.  She was pregnant and due about 4 months after me.  She kept moving all my things around because she said they looked better that way.  Yeah maybe, but I have kind of strange taste and like them the way I like them.  Months later, when I had to stay at my moms for a while, she would come over with her son to visit.  She would use the diapers I had and never replace them.  She always said she forgot them.  Once or twice, maybe, but not to the point where I had to buy twice as many as I should.  Since her son could only have one type due to allergies, I started buying another brand.  I offered her a diaper doubler since I had them and they were cheap the first time she came over without them after I started buying them.  She had the nerve to make a comment that I should go back to the other kind, because now she had to make sure she brought them with her.  I said sorry, but I liked this brand better.
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: Twik on April 07, 2007, 01:41:37 PM
(Gives Joannie81 a thumbs up!)
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: ginlyn32 on April 11, 2007, 02:38:54 PM
I don't know whether I would call my parents bad houseguests...they are just clueless I guess.

My dad will talk or complain through any tv show or movie he doesn't like. Or he will just make fun of it loudly so that you can't hear it.

My mom expects to  be waited on hand and foot. She expects it to be like a hotel. I don't mind doing extra cleaning or cooking but at least help out! The last time they were here, she asked me if I wanted help in the kitchen and I said yes. She then goes, oh I was just asking to be polite. I told her that it WASN"T polite to offer help and then refuse when the offer was accepted.

When we go to their house, I am expected to help cook and clean. Sometimes I even clean their house so my mom can't talk about how we tore her house up. I know she would too.

So I think the next time they want to visit, I may point them to the nearest hotel. That way we will all be happy.

Ginger
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: SnugsMom on April 11, 2007, 03:01:27 PM
Great uncle kicked him so hard he knocked the dog over - onto his bad side - and could it not get up.

My jaw is on the floor.  I would have flipped out completely.
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: SnugsMom on April 11, 2007, 03:09:54 PM
This isn't nearly as bad as some of the stories but it's still strange and gross.

My sister and her husband had his sister and her husband staying with them.  The visitors slept in the upstairs spare bedroom which has its own bathroom, closets, etc, but nothing resembling its own refrigerator, which apparently was a problem.

The guests brought a bunch of food with them when they came, which seems polite.  But instead of putting it in the fridge in the kitchen, apparently they were afraid my sis and BIL would eat it, so they took it upstairs with them.  Perishable food.  They didn't bother to throw the leftovers into the trash and naturally, the leftovers spoiled and the entire top floor of their house smelled like rotten food after they left.  They had eaten in bed and the bedding was stained and covered in crumbs.  Scraps of food were sitting on top of the bureaus.  It took my sis a month to get the "rotten meat" smell out of that bedroom.
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: SnugsMom on April 11, 2007, 03:24:57 PM
Ok, I just thought of another weird one, but this happened to my OTHER sister.

My sis has in-laws that go everywhere in this GIGANTIC RV.  They always invite themselves to visit saying that since they have the RV they won't really be houseguests and won't really be inconveniencing anyone.  Riiiiiight. 

A couple of years ago my sis and her now-husband rented a house on a lake for a week.  Both families were invited to join them, but most people are polite enough to know that you should give them SOME time to themselves.  After all they are paying for the property.  So my family was there for the first weekend and lo and behold, here come the ILs in their giant RV.  We left on Sunday.  ILs stayed the entire week. 

Later in the week, sis had invited her best friend (Laurie) and her husband to spend the night. 

As you can imagine, the giant RV has a bathroom, so I have no explanation for this story other than the fact that the ILs know no boundaries.

On Thursday morning, Laurie was taking a shower in the house with the bathroom door locked, and MIL pounded on the door and badgered her (b/c she HAD to "go") until she got out of the shower, gathered her clothes, and got the hell out of the bathroom.

On Friday morning, my sister was in the shower and had not locked the door.  MIL walked right in and went #2 while she was showering, not 3 feet from the shower curtain.

My sister got out of the shower, got dressed, told her fiance to enjoy the remaining two days with his parents, got in her car, and drove home.
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: Sophia on April 11, 2007, 10:25:36 PM
On Thursday morning, Laurie was taking a shower in the house with the bathroom door locked, and MIL pounded on the door and badgered her (b/c she HAD to "go") until she got out of the shower, gathered her clothes, and got the hell out of the bathroom.

Might be a tad PA, but I think I would have spent hours in the bathroom.  Washing my hair can take 45 minutes.  Then add in shaving.  Then add some other things. 
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: Gambitgirl on April 12, 2007, 12:09:03 AM
i have one, it's awful!

my younger sister came to town one weekend for her 10 year HS reunion about 2 years ago. unfortunately i got very sick and wound up in the hospital that weekend from complication from my Crohn's disease for 3 days. i was supposed to go to her reunion w/ her b/c i know a lot of her old HS friend, but obviously couldn't. i was in immense pain and doped up on morphine while undergoing tests and treatment.

my sister was supposed to stay with me that weekend so we could go to the reunion together, so I gave her a housekey and told her to still feel free to still use my house to get ready at and stay in for her reunion so she didn't have to drive all the way out to our parent's house in the county. i got out of the hospital the day after the reunion and went straight to my house to shower and change clothes b/c before i went over to my parents' house to rest and spend time with them.

i walked in and my house was a wreck! there were glasses and litter everywhere, all my beer and some of fmy ood was gone. the trash was overflowing as were the ashtrays. i found a pair of men's boxers on the floor of my bedroom and saw used condoms in my trashcan. apparently my sister brought some people over to my house for an after-party and someone had sex in my bed! sis had apparently gotten up and gone to my parents' house to await my arrival from the hospital w/o hiding the evidence for some reason ???

i went to my parents' house in a fury and confronted sis. her defense??? "i didn't know you would be going right back to you house after you got out of the hospital! i was going to go back and clean it up after you got here!"

i said, "what? so it was ok if i didn't find out!" she had the gall to get angry at me for catching her out! she said "if you did that to me i wouldn't be upset!" and i said "that's the difference, i would never do anything so horrible!" turns out she was the one who has sex in my bed with a former classmate  :-X

my parents were upset i was yelling so much but i told them if they dare took her side on this i would never speak to them again b/c after all i was in the hospital while she was having a party at my house and sex in my bed! my sister got all indignant and said "well if that's the way you feel about it maybe i should just leave right now!" and i screamed that that was fine by me. she got in her car and drove back to Washington, DC a day earlier than planned. my parents were upset my sister had left early and so angry, but again i told them that if they dare took her side in any way shape or form i'd freak out on them for defending her inexcusable behavior.

my parents settled down after they'd processed everything b/c it sunk it just how badly i and my home had been mistreated. this sister and i are quite close, which is why this hurt me so badly, if my older sister did this i would still be pissed but not surprised b/c she's just that way.  i didn't take her calls for a month after that and when we did talk i told her that if she ever wanted to stay in my home again she had to abide by my rules and respect me and my house or she would never be welcome in it again. i think it finally sunk in at that point how mad i was and she apologized and said she would never treat me like that again. she hasn't...but i still am deeply bothered to think she has that level of disgusting rudeness and insensitivity in her to think she could do that to me, supposedly her best friend.
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: SnugsMom on April 12, 2007, 08:18:33 AM
On Thursday morning, Laurie was taking a shower in the house with the bathroom door locked, and MIL pounded on the door and badgered her (b/c she HAD to "go") until she got out of the shower, gathered her clothes, and got the hell out of the bathroom.

Might be a tad PA, but I think I would have spent hours in the bathroom.  Washing my hair can take 45 minutes.  Then add in shaving.  Then add some other things. 


LOL Tempting, but I'd imagine she was so shocked at having someone pounding on the door yelling that she'd been in there long enough, that she just got her stuff and got out.
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: Sophia on April 12, 2007, 09:57:24 AM
On Thursday morning, Laurie was taking a shower in the house with the bathroom door locked, and MIL pounded on the door and badgered her (b/c she HAD to "go") until she got out of the shower, gathered her clothes, and got the hell out of the bathroom.
Might be a tad PA, but I think I would have spent hours in the bathroom.  Washing my hair can take 45 minutes.  Then add in shaving.  Then add some other things.
LOL Tempting, but I'd imagine she was so shocked at having someone pounding on the door yelling that she'd been in there long enough, that she just got her stuff and got out.
Yah, unfortunately when other people behave really really badly, sometimes our brain just freezes.  I would have definately done it the second time though.  She was smart to leave early.  I am sure her bf had lots of fun without her. NOT.   

I don't think I would have had to deal with that.  My FH is shameless.  He would say, "You need to stay out of the house until at least noon."  Why?  "Because we will be having s*e*x."  Even if we weren't. 

Note: I added the * myself.  I figure if the word g*a*y might bring annoying ads, then so might s*e*x.
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: SnugsMom on April 13, 2007, 01:19:02 PM
On Thursday morning, Laurie was taking a shower in the house with the bathroom door locked, and MIL pounded on the door and badgered her (b/c she HAD to "go") until she got out of the shower, gathered her clothes, and got the hell out of the bathroom.
Might be a tad PA, but I think I would have spent hours in the bathroom.  Washing my hair can take 45 minutes.  Then add in shaving.  Then add some other things.
LOL Tempting, but I'd imagine she was so shocked at having someone pounding on the door yelling that she'd been in there long enough, that she just got her stuff and got out.
Yah, unfortunately when other people behave really really badly, sometimes our brain just freezes.  I would have definately done it the second time though.  She was smart to leave early.  I am sure her bf had lots of fun without her. NOT.   

I don't think I would have had to deal with that.  My FH is shameless.  He would say, "You need to stay out of the house until at least noon."  Why?  "Because we will be having s*e*x."  Even if we weren't. 

Note: I added the * myself.  I figure if the word g*a*y might bring annoying ads, then so might s*e*x.

AHAHHAAH Yeah I can see how that would definitely keep the ILs out!
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: Cellardoor14 on April 13, 2007, 04:24:07 PM

That would be my SIL

She was suppose to be there for two weeks and it ended up being 3 months.

I've repressed most the memories but still remember The Chocolate Donut Incident

She refused to eat anything I made for about a day. Then when I was having two chocolate donuts as a treat (I had offer to get her one from the bakery and she said no), SIL told a donut off my plate and ate it.

Oh here's another little gem.  Her comment when I was seven months pregnant and bedridden due to complications:  "You know , you just look really fat.  Maybe you shouldn't just lay around all day. That's kinda lazy."

And she wonders out aloud to my DH why I don't like her. 
(He reminds why of course  ;))

Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: Twik on April 13, 2007, 05:08:35 PM
On Thursday morning, Laurie was taking a shower in the house with the bathroom door locked, and MIL pounded on the door and badgered her (b/c she HAD to "go") until she got out of the shower, gathered her clothes, and got the hell out of the bathroom.
Might be a tad PA, but I think I would have spent hours in the bathroom.  Washing my hair can take 45 minutes.  Then add in shaving.  Then add some other things.
LOL Tempting, but I'd imagine she was so shocked at having someone pounding on the door yelling that she'd been in there long enough, that she just got her stuff and got out.
Yah, unfortunately when other people behave really really badly, sometimes our brain just freezes.  I would have definately done it the second time though.  She was smart to leave early.  I am sure her bf had lots of fun without her. NOT.   

I don't think I would have had to deal with that.  My FH is shameless.  He would say, "You need to stay out of the house until at least noon."  Why?  "Because we will be having s*e*x."  Even if we weren't. 

Note: I added the * myself.  I figure if the word g*a*y might bring annoying ads, then so might s*e*x.

AHAHHAAH Yeah I can see how that would definitely keep the ILs out!

Not necessarily. I think I recall one story on the old board about some ILs who had no problem with entering the bedroom during private activities.  :o

I think I'd swear off sex for life if I were that couple.
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: Venus193 on April 13, 2007, 07:26:30 PM
I wasn't the host here, but here's my story.

My first apartment was a studio in a nice house in a residential neighborhood near my college.  I worked nights as a bartender in those days.  On Labor Day weekend my landlord and his wife had the Houseguests from Hell:  An English couple and their three hellspawn (ages 9, 6, and 4).  To this day I have trouble remembering that the couple were supposed to be university professors because they fell for the Summerhill approach to parenting which, as far as I could see, meant allowing the brats to do whatever they pleased.

I found myself locked out when I came home at 5 AM.  The chain bolt had been put on the back door when the guests were specifically instructed not to touch it.  I had to wake up my landlord to get in.  At 9:30 one of these brats tried to break my door down.  They screamed and carried on all weekend.  When I finally saw the landlord's wife toward the next weekend she was exhausted.  She told me that these brats ran all over the furniture, harrassed the dog (the sweetest Great Pyranees you ever saw) until she hid in the master bedroom all weekend.  She had just finished shampooing all the upholstery and carpets.  She then put her foot down and told her husband that under no circumstances was this family ever invited again.
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: Nuala on April 14, 2007, 12:10:37 PM
Before SIL married her now ex-husband, they were vacationing in a beach area in the next state.  DH suggested they come visit us several times, but each time they declined.

Until they changed their minds and called to say they were on their way.

The house wasn't really up to visitors.  My children were young, and I was more apt to spend time with them than clean--although I did try to clean one room a day (my joke was that the house was always clean, just not at the same time).  Also, her ex had never been to the house before, and I like people to see it at its best, at least the first time.  After that, they get what they get!

Dear friends took my children to their swimming lessons and library time so I could wash sheets and scrub toilets.  I spent the entire day cleaning, except for a quick run to the market.

After they arrived, I asked them what they would like for dinner, Meal A or B.  "Oh, don't worry about us.  We're going out to dinner." 
And so they did.

DH was a little shocked and said to me, "You shouldn't have to cook tonight.  What you would like me to bring home?"  Um, mints for their friggin' pillows?  If they wanted to eat by themselves, why didn't they do it before they got to our house, rather than just "checking in" before they went out?

A few years earlier, she was looking for a 6 week class to take, and her parents wanted her to stay with us.  "She could help take care of the baby!" they said.  Yeah, she would have held my son while I cleaned up after her.  Thank goodness I had the presence of mind to decline that little invitation!

Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: ShadesOfGrey on April 14, 2007, 12:55:32 PM
We have had houseguests for the past month.  The Other Mom and her two dd's I've written often about here.

We originally agreed that they could stay with us until their new house became available on April 5th.  About mid-way through March, Other Mom decided she didn't really want to move into that particular house after all, so she started looking for a different house.  Of course, the only houses she qualified for and liked were not available until later in April, or the end of April.

She asked if they could stay for the month of April.  We sat down with her and told her we were able to accomodate her only until April 5th, which was our original agreement.  Beyond that, she would have to find something else.  We were polite, calm, and united.  She took it rather well.

So they left yesterday.  It would have been easy to give in, out of guilt, out of concern for her kids, out of some sort of desire to do for her what her own family didn't seem to want to do, whatever.  But we didn't relent, and we didn't waiver.  When she would talk about how hard it was trying to find accomodations, etc. I would listen intently, then change the subject.  I refused to get drawn in.  It seemed to work.

Our house is our own again.  I wish her well, but I was glad to see her go.

Shoo, I remember this thread, and I just want tosay GOOD FOR YOU! ;D :D :) ;) :)  I am so glad your house is your own again and that you and your DH were able to stick to your guns. yay!
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: Alida on April 14, 2007, 01:19:05 PM
Not the worst, but the most tiring... DH's aunt, mother, sister, brother in law, niece, nephew and other sister... three weeks.  It was slightly staggered in that we only had 2 weeks with everyone here and a few days with just everyone but one sister on one and and only her on the other end.

I did nothing but babysit the children - and they wondered why I wasn't doing more family things.  Uh, I was too exhausted!  And did I mention that we'd gotten Orion, only 8 weeks old at the time, just a week before they all came?

Three weeks.

Never again. 

Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: willow08 on April 17, 2007, 09:50:37 AM


Dear friends took my children to their swimming lessons and library time so I could wash sheets and scrub toilets.  I spent the entire day cleaning, except for a quick run to the market.



You have awesome friends! (Shame about the in-laws, though.)
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: Nuala on April 18, 2007, 04:05:08 PM
Yes, my friends were lovely to help out like that.

It's been almost 20 years and they have moved.  Still have the SIL though.  ;)
Title: Re: The WORST houseguest?
Post by: Thipu1 on April 18, 2007, 06:59:46 PM
The worst houseguest we had was one we didn't get but it was a close thing. 

Back in the mid 80s I received a phone call from a cousin.  Her son had been accepted at an art school close to our home.  We  offered her congratulations.  She had an offer of a very different kind in mind.

Her son, who I'll call Axl, wanted to find an off-campus apartment but didn't have the opportunity to go looking.  Could we put him up while he attended classes until he found a suitable place?

I had doubts about this.  Mr. Thipu and I had only been married a few years.  We had no experience dealing with a person of College age.  Our neighborhood was still a bit on the iffy side.  We knew there was a crack-house on the next block and a dubious 'Youth Center' on the corner.  We told my cousin about this but she still wanted her son to live with us.

I made a day-trip up to her house to interview Axl.  He was a polite young man.  He also was very Goth.  I do not mean to offend Goths but, in the mid 1980s 'Goth' seemed a bit more dangerous than it does today.   

I asked about his art.  He reluctantly showed me his portfolio with the caveat that it was 'violent'.  He was a talented artist but his art was a very flamboyant type of Anime that involved a lot of spurting blood. I was starting to have real doubts about setting up my old drafting table for Axl in out guest room.   

My doubts were confirmed when I asked Axl if he knew much about Brooklyn.  Yes, he knew a lot.  He and his mates often drove down to clubs in odder areas of Brooklyn and got into swinging matches with Home Boys.  That clinched it!

I wanted to help my young relative but the vibes were very, very wrong.  We were not about to give keys to a kid who went out and got into fights. with people who might just follow him home.