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51
Time For a Coffee Break! / Re: What's your brain bleach?
« Last post by cabbagegirl28 on Today at 07:32:04 PM »
Long talks with my friends/fraternity sisters

Music, especially Christmas music (I have several days worth of Christmas music) or choral music (The Kings' Singers, Chanticleer, music composed by Morten Lauridsen). However, I'm relaxing to a mix I made for listening on the drive to grad school, and that's equally wonderful to me.

2048 (either the regular one or the circle of fifths one)

Playing one of my many instruments or singing through pieces I'm working on

If all else fails, cuddling a stuffed animal usually helps. I don't have a dog to cuddle and love on, so I make do with my stuffies.

I had and still have issues with anxiety, so I make sure I have what I like to term "exit strategies". My grad school profs really emphasize the importance of self-care, especially since we're going into a helping profession. After all, if we don't give ourselves what we need, how can we have the ability to give others what they need?
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Time For a Coffee Break! / Re: What's your brain bleach?
« Last post by rose red on Today at 07:31:59 PM »
youtube videos of musicals, animals, kids, (anything nice).

Library or bookstore where I can browse titles for hours.
53
Family and Children / Re: Big Momma and the Birthday Battle
« Last post by KenveeB on Today at 07:28:16 PM »
I've adopted a firm policy with my family, after many years of problems, that if I'm not important enough to the event that my schedule is considered, then I'm obviously not so crucial that I can't be there if I have a schedule conflict. If I'm free, I'll go, but if not, I cite "other plans" without a tiny speck of guilt.

OP, keep firm to your response. I'd adopt a tone of honest bafflement. "I wasn't told about the party in enough time to make plans, I have my own plans for my own birthday that day, and I'll be with Mom for her actual birthday in November. Why would it be a problem I'm not at this party?" And every time Mom or Aunt tries to pull the guilt trip, firmly repeat that you'll be with Mom for her actual birthday. Missing the party isn't a big deal!
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Time For a Coffee Break! / Re: What's your brain bleach?
« Last post by readingchick on Today at 07:27:15 PM »
It depends, but I can usually reset myself on Pinterest: music I've pinned, a video of Patrick Hicks talking about the inspiration behind "The Commandant of Lubizec", even recipes. Lately I've been immersing myself in the world of Diana Gabaldon's Outlander series.
55
Time For a Coffee Break! / Re: Librarians, educate me please!
« Last post by Katana_Geldar on Today at 07:24:46 PM »
I'm a library technician, we are the ones who do the cataloging and putting together the Dewey numbers. There's a science to putting a correct Dewey number together as the content of the book can be broken down into what it's about and where it about. The more specific a book is, the longer a Dewey number can be.

A book about the habits of cane toads in Cairns is going to have a longer Dewey number than a book about amphibians as it's more specific. You don't have to construct the whole number sometimes as it can be done for you by another library tech and you just need to find it, I used to use a website to make my Dewey numbers when I did my diploma and I swear I found a constructed Dewey number for a book on the international export of onions.  :o
<snip>

That is really interesting! Thank you for telling us.

Would you happen to remember what the name of the website was?

It was shocking to me to find out that some U.S. books only have Library Of Congress numbers, and not Dewey Decimal numbers. It makes it hard to shelve books in a DD# based library.  >:(
Web Dewey is the site, but you need to be a member to use it.
http://dewey.org/webdewey/login/login.html;jsessionid=B4F2B5B81675261D6EDE966738F3828F

And I wasn't trained in Library of Congress Classification, none of the cataloging teachers knew how to do it. I had to use a library with it at my first year at uni and I hated the system, gave up trying to work it out so I just remembered where the books I wanted were.
56
Family and Children / Re: Not Inviting Sister
« Last post by KenveeB on Today at 07:18:47 PM »
Secondly ,  if your sister posted "I did some bad things in my marriage and now my sister dislikes me so much that she invited my ex husband and children to her kids Bday parties. I don't really want my kids around someone who actively dislikes me so much they can't stand to have me in the same home as them. Can I say no my children wont be attended?". I'm pretty sure many of us would answer if your sister cant hid her dislike your children shouldn't be around her.  She has a nuclear option too. You may not care if she exercises it but your spouse , parents and kids might.  And in all honesty her and Jake may still get back together or at least become amicable for the kids.

That wouldn't be my answer. My answer would first be, "How does your sister inviting your ex and children to her kids bday parties show that she dislikes you? If the kids are friends and cousins, there's nothing wrong with inviting them. And unless she's actively bad-mouthing you in front of the kids, I don't see anything wrong with your kids being around someone who dislikes you. That happens in divorce."

My second answer would be, "You don't have to take your children to events at your sister's house if you feel that way, but you don't have any control over your ex taking them if the events are when he has custody. That's one of the hazards of getting divorced. You don't have control over what your co-parent decides to do. Unless it's something that would actually be dangerous to them, it's out of your control. Feel free to talk to your ex about not wanting your kids there, but you'll have to accept it if he doesn't agree."
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Family and Children / Re: Not Inviting Sister
« Last post by CharlieBraun on Today at 07:02:11 PM »
OP, do you feel as though inviting your sister is condoning her adultery?  Allowing her to wrap her extramarital relationship in the blanket of family acceptance of it?

I would, myself. 

I'd go for a cooling off period, and if questioned by family, state something like "I'd prefer not to spend much time with her for a while."

58
Time For a Coffee Break! / Re: What's your brain bleach?
« Last post by Bijou on Today at 06:42:20 PM »
Working a word puzzle or game.  It occupies my mind and takes it away from what is bothering me.
59
Time For a Coffee Break! / Re: Update on nephews-K'nnihave's sons
« Last post by Nuala on Today at 06:40:37 PM »
I'm so happy for Nephew 1. You and your husband did a wonderful job modeling appropriate behavior and boundaries for him. I hope he can rescue his brother at some point.

I agree with a previous poster about BIL and his disapproval of N1's desire to travel. I'm a little surprised that he and K'nnihve are still together.

Thank you so much for updating us, Roe. I well remember The Summer of No. It's a shame you had to go through all that, but it was entertaining reading!
60
Time For a Coffee Break! / Re: S/O PD Student Darwinism
« Last post by Sirius on Today at 06:38:24 PM »
My sister was given most of her tests orally because her dyslexia was so bad.  She did well enough with this that the school district decided she didn't need her tutor, and took the tutor away - whereupon her grades would drop like meteors.  My mother argued quite a bit with the school board those three years.  My poor sister went from having a tutor to not having a tutor, to having a tutor to not having a tutor, and her grades bounced up and down accordingly.   

UUGG That is when you beat your head against the wall.

See even with a diagnoses of an LD - you only need interventions if there is a significant difference between your expected level of performance and your actual level of performance. If you are performing on level you don't need interventions anymore and they are removed. A few cycles of that and then the admin accuses you of trying to game the system. New testing laws both Federal and Texas (Don't know about other states) also severely limit accommodations because the politicians believe that LD's are being falsely diagnosed so schools can put trouble kids on modified test. So basically kids in life skills (severe cognitive disability and will always need to live with family/half way house/or nursing home care) are being given the same test as mainstream kids.  The stunt El Paso pulled hurt kids across the state.

The only fortunate thing about the whole situation was that my mother was a mother bear squared when it came to Younger Sis.  I suspect that Mom had struggled mightily in school from the stories she told, and she was determined that YS wouldn't have to struggle as much as she did.  Mom would take on the school board on a regular basis, and never lost once. 
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