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81
All In A Day's Work / Re: "Are you still teaching?"
« Last post by Stricken_Halo on Today at 08:39:51 AM »
Thanks, all, for helping me see I should not be so sensitive about this question. I will use some of your suggested responses the next time someone asks.

Quote
Maybe OP is hearing subtext because she's tired of teaching and hasn't admitted it to herself yet?

I honestly don't think this is it. If I'm unhappy with anything, it's aging, not teaching.

82
Glitches, errors, problems / Re: EHELL just got really really small
« Last post by coolio on Today at 08:28:06 AM »
Try pressing ctrl and 0 together. It might be that you reduced the font size inadvertently when typing.
83
Time For a Coffee Break! / Re: What.....wait, .....WHAT?
« Last post by PastryGoddess on Today at 08:27:10 AM »
-snip-
I'm not saying that child support is the right of the parent.  I'm saying that I find it questionable that a parent can have child support mandated for a child s/he never knew existed but can also be blocked from ever even meeting that child.

Sorry that quote tree was getting a bit crazy.

I see it this way. The child support is a legal thing.  Whereas the blocking of contact is a personal thing that can be enforced through legal action. 
84
Life...in general / Re: Unwanted gifts
« Last post by Harriet Jones on Today at 08:23:58 AM »
Not all generosity is polite. Creating a false or too-sudden intimacy is actually quite outside the bounds of etiquette (where "etiquette" = "bad form" as opposed to "meanness to another person").

Creating a false or too-sudden intimacy is, in fact, what con men and abusers do. That's why it's incredibly bad form for people to do it.

It's also a signal of people who view the balance in your relationship very differently. Which is awkward.
--snip--

(They also may have bought similar photos for other people, and so maybe you just got piggybacked; if they bought present for other people who were at the event where the photos were taken, they may have worried that you've be insulted to have been left out.)
I think that if they are close enough to share a holiday together, they might be close enough that it is entirely fine to spend pictures from the shared holiday to the people. And I think it's also entirely possible, that they don't plan to gift later on, but this is single time occurrence because they think that oh, now we have something that the family XX might really want.
Example: I usually don't gift my cousins or most of the aunts. However, one year we were all gathered at the same time to my parents' house and I was taking pictures. That year I gave everyone a picture which was collection of pictures chosen so that everyone who was present was pictured in at least one. Didn't even think that they would owe me anything back because of that. I just thought it would be nice of them to have some pictures from the gathering :D And this sounds quite similar situation actually! Gift is a picture from a shared holiday. (And some extra stuff)

The OP says they're pretty large photos, though.  If I was going to send copies of vacation photos, I would be more likely to send snapshot size (4"x6"), rather than assume they wanted something to hang on their wall. 
85
Family and Children / Re: S/O the kiss hello
« Last post by Psychopoesie on Today at 08:23:18 AM »
When I stayed with friends who lived in Greece, they did kiss both cheeks - no air kissing. In fact, when I did that to my friend's sister, she called me out on it, only half-jokingly. Don't know if it's just their family custom, common to the island they're from or more widespread in Greece.

I'm from Oz. For me, the kissing cheek thing is usually just with family. I'm not big on the whole hugging/kissing thing generally, except with close friends. With some, it's more of an air kiss in a jokey way or very light with cheeks just touching. Happier shaking hands with people I've just met or acquaintances. Just saying hi is fine too.

I did get some good advice from Ehell earlier about how to dodge my very nice SIL whose family tradition is to kiss hello and goodbye *on the lips* - not something I'm comfortable with. So far it's been working. Thanks folks!
86
Glitches, errors, problems / EHELL just got really really small
« Last post by POF on Today at 08:19:47 AM »
As  Iwas typing - the entire website is not teeny teeny tiny.  No other open window got rally tiny. not sure if its me or something glitched ... but though I'd bring it up. I will poopadities down and reboot.  ....
87
All In A Day's Work / Re: If you had bothered to ask beforehand....
« Last post by POF on Today at 08:18:15 AM »
I am against giving the boss big group gifts altogether. Gifts, if any in the workplace, should come from the top down. It's one thing to give a small token gift, but a large gift that requires many people to put in $12.50 is, IMHO, inappropriate. I'm glad you did your own thing and am glad you refused to participate. I wonder if anyone else refused as well.

I am sooooo against this.  I remind my managers every year that gifts go top down and they should not spend their time and money on me :).  I gift to them and it is always a visa gidt card.  I tell them - I could take you all out to a fancy $$$ lunch or give you the money and you can go out with your significant other or spend it on lottery tickets  ;D.  They all laugh and are appreciative.  We work closely with each other every day and I know we would all see a fancy lunch ( for just the four of us as a chore ) .


My secretary is married to a very successful business owner, no children , loves to shop and is very fashionable.   She has exquisite taste, loves to buy gifts and every year gets me a stunning scarf - I always accept it graciously - because she loves doing it. ( and I wear them all the time ) .


You are absolutely fine and you boss should really put a stop tp big departmental gifts.  ( Token smaller things are fine - one of my managers went to a Portuguese bakery and brought me a dozen donts to share with my family, another always buys me a paperback romance novel ( kind of a joke between us ) . 


88
Life...in general / Re: Need advice from Catholic Ehellions
« Last post by Alicia on Today at 08:01:45 AM »
Yes you give a donation. Donation is typically $100-500 is my understanding or at least what my family does. More if asking a lot of the priest or church.The rule my family uses is 2% of funeral cost min 100.

My prayers and sympathy for you and your family.
89
All In A Day's Work / Re: If you had bothered to ask beforehand....
« Last post by Venus193 on Today at 07:58:56 AM »
I am against giving the boss big group gifts altogether. Gifts, if any in the workplace, should come from the top down. It's one thing to give a small token gift, but a large gift that requires many people to put in $12.50 is, IMHO, inappropriate. I'm glad you did your own thing and am glad you refused to participate. I wonder if anyone else refused as well.

This.  Here's hoping you don't have to deal with this at your next position.
90
Family and Children / Re: S/O the kiss hello
« Last post by menley on Today at 07:53:19 AM »
When I meet people I put my hand out to shake hands.  That is the limit I am willing to touch other people.

I really despise the air-kiss; it looks like such hypocrisy.

Can you explain the bolded? I don't understand that at all.

Regarding others' posts as to whether you're actually kissing the cheek - I currently live in Europe and no one that I've met actually kisses the cheek. Generally you press the side of your cheek very lightly against theirs and kiss the air next to it, so you have cheek-to-cheek touching but no lips on anything.

It gets rather confusing for me as different groups of people do a different number of kisses! For example, we live in country H but have a lot of expat friends from country B. Country H kisses both cheeks, starting with the left. Country B only kisses one cheek, the right. So if I'm in a group of people mixed between H and B people... well, let's just say that there have been some funny near-kisses ;)
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