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I will usually use an identifier at the beginning of the thread and then name after.  I find I relate more when names are given.  I would start the thread, my friend Jane and her husband, Bob... then later I would just say Jane and Bob since it was established at the beginning who they are..
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Life...in general / Re: Thanks for nothing! Flaky guests.
« Last post by Otterpop on Today at 09:14:35 AM »
So sorry about your dinner plans OP.  It's bothersome when guests cancel at the last minute.  The last time that happened to me I did not include those particular friends in any plans ever again (they cancelled w/ no explanation, were fine next day).

However, the mother had a child die last year, Jasmine lost her sibling.  They are losing their home and the stress is causing what's left of the family to fall apart.  I'd give them a pass on being flaky.  With a year like that, I'd find it hard to take a shower, brush my teeth or even get out of bed.

It's annoying to you but understandable for them.  Maybe they thought two guests would not make a difference.  Maybe they couldn't see beyond their own grief.

((Hugs)) and have a great Thanksgiving.  There can never be enough left over turkey (turkey sandwiches, soup, croquettes, you can freeze it, dice it for pet food...).
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Life...in general / Re: Thanks for nothing! Flaky guests.
« Last post by Jloreli on Today at 09:08:14 AM »
Last year I was given a GIANT turkey and decided to cook it the weekend after Christmas. I invited a co-work and her two small kids a few weeks in advance but she never said one way or the other. I asked her a couple of times but not wanting to be a pest let the matter drop and figured they wouldn't come. You know what's coming right? I got a text while I was in the middle of the cooking rush saying they would love to come and what could they bring.  ::) At that point it may have been a major ehell fail but I replied that since she hadn't said she was coming I had assumed they weren't and DH had invited some of his coworkers so now there was no room. So sorry we will miss you, see you Monday. She seemed ok with this and was unphased as far as I could tell.

I don't know which is worse....last minute cancel or last minute acceptance?
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Interesting point, as I wonder about that sometimes when I'm posting. I usually write "my friend Amy" or "my former co-worker Emma" to give context, but at the same time I worry that people are going to say, "Yes, yes, we know who that is!" I guess even if they do, that's better than saying, "Wait, who is that again?"
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Time For a Coffee Break! / Re: Silly Reasons You Dumped Someone
« Last post by Lynn2000 on Today at 09:03:29 AM »
Yeah, I really don't like the trope of "women don't like guys who are too nice" because it's rarely about being too nice--it's often about showing no initiative, or being boring, or being too passive, which are all way different than being nice, which I equate to "kind". I have never known a woman to not be into a guy because he was too kind.

I think too many people confuse "nice guy" (= guy who is kind) with "Nice Guy (TM)" (= guy who believes he can "nice" his way into a female friend's pants).  Nice Guys need everyone to see how nice they are, how supportive and wonderful they are, because they believe they should get credit for every nice thing they do and eventually, somehow, all that credit will eventually transform "friend" into "girlfriend."  These are the guys who whine and complain about how girls always end up with pushy alpha guys - completely overlooking the fact that women (we're not "girls") generally choose our romantic and sexual partners based on compatibility and respect and attraction rather than who buys us the most lattes and gives us the most rides when our cars are in the shop.

I knew one of those "Nice Guys" and your description was very apt for him.  He'd make a big show about how he still had manners such as opening doors for women, talk about treating them like queens, etc.  It got kind of obnoxious, really cause he'd be going on and on about manners while talking over you anytime you wanted to say anything.  ::)

Yeah, show, don't tell. Anytime someone starts going on about the great stuff they themselves do, I start to get a bit suspicious, especially if it seems to be out of context with the rest of the conversation. I think if it's a deep-set part of someone's character, they will just do stuff, and not find it remarkable enough to mention that often.

Though, as I mentioned earlier, there's also the nice guy who you could see turning into a doormat or being taken advantage of by others--the guy who's always spending his weekends helping friends move or driving them to the airport or stuff like that, with no indication that his friends do anything for him in return. I don't know if that would be considered as "too kind" or in some other category, but that's not a train I want to get on--I don't want to be cast as the bad guy who says, "Bob's always borrowing money and never paying it back, stop lending to him," or "Can't we spend some time together without your friends around?"
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Holidays / Re: Boycotting Black Friday
« Last post by lmyrs on Today at 09:02:19 AM »
In the event they try to urge you to come along and bring Baby what about invoking "Doctor said"? As in "Oh my goodness Baby's Doctor said it isn't a good idea to expose Baby to large crowds until she/he is X months old. We wouldn't want to get XYZ especially during the holidays!" With X months old being what ever Baby's actual age is plus a few months.

This seems like an excellent way to be back in a year trying to make up a new excuse.

Lots of people don't like BF shopping and it has nothing to do with morals and ethics. You don't have to go into details. Just tell them you don't like it.  Putting this on the baby is just going to mean dealing with it every year while baby grows up. Own your dislike as yours or you're asking for years of trouble
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Holidays / Re: Boycotting Black Friday
« Last post by Jloreli on Today at 08:50:56 AM »
In the event they try to urge you to come along and bring Baby what about invoking "Doctor said"? As in "Oh my goodness Baby's Doctor said it isn't a good idea to expose Baby to large crowds until she/he is X months old. We wouldn't want to get XYZ especially during the holidays!" With X months old being what ever Baby's actual age is plus a few months.
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Last night I made Spicy Southwestern Pumpkin Soup and Cheddar Bay Parker House Rolls for today's dinner at my PILs.

I was starting a second batch of rolls...but then the power went out.

So I sat and watched the fire with a glass of wine.  That's still an accomplishment, right?

LOL.  That was me Monday night, although I read my Kindle by headlamp, rather than watched the fire, since I don't have a fireplace.

Would you be willing to share your recipes?  Both the soup and the rolls sound delicious!
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Last night I made Spicy Southwestern Pumpkin Soup and Cheddar Bay Parker House Rolls for today's dinner at my PILs.

I was starting a second batch of rolls...but then the power went out.

So I sat and watched the fire with a glass of wine.  That's still an accomplishment, right?
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Not much done Tuesday or yesterday.  Tuesday morning, in the 15 minutes before I had to go to work, I did some tidying in my spare room to make room for more stuff.  And spent the evening knitting a hat that was commissioned for a silent auction next week.  Yesterday, I did my farm trip, washed the lettuce and spinach, put all the vegetables away, finished the hat and loaded and ran the dishwasher.

I have a big weekend planned.  I want to make at least one batch of all the cookies I normally make for Christmas - pecan balls, almond crescents, cranberry white chocolate shortbread, whipped shortbread, regular shortbread and gingerbread.  And still try to do some tidying and unpacking in the hoard.
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