Policy for when there are issues with posters?

[wheeitsme]

I believe the policy tends to be to notify the Mods and stop posting.  Sometimes truth is stranger than fiction, sometimes the truth is fiction.  It's the Moderators' responsibility to make that call.  In the meantime, I figure if I'm not posting, I'm not in danger of attacking a possible innocent.


my 2cents.

I mostly agree but when it becomes thread upon thread of drama upon drama, including extremely sensitive tragedies,  with people getting emotionally invested, it starts to become painful to watch - as I said above.

I didn't say it was easy.  Sometimes the hardest thing to do is to not respond. But moderating the forum is the role of the Moderators.  And I think the proof of what a good job they do is manifest in the forum itself.  So sometimes I just have to notify them, trust in their judgement, and walk away.

[Two Ravens]

What about sending a private message to the poster you are having doubts about?

I am not sure what this would accomplish...are you expecting the person to come clean?  It would more likely add fuel to the fire, "Now, I am getting harrassed by PM!" etc.

[Hollanda]

What about sending a private message to the poster you are having doubts about?

I am not sure what this would accomplish...are you expecting the person to come clean?  It would more likely add fuel to the fire, "Now, I am getting harrassed by PM!" etc.

I guess...just a suggestion.

[Perfect Circle]

I remember a long time ago when I merely lurked the Dame said it was ok to question posters - it was in the LizettaRose thread about a co-irker trying to kill her:

http://www.etiquettehell.com/smf/index.php?topic=23488.msg526192#msg526192

I don't think sending a PM will establish anything - a troll is unlikely to respond in the affirmative.

However, I personally report posts rather than call people out.

[pierrotlunaire0]

Thanks WF, I'm usually a lot sharper than that.  now that they've been pointed out, the inconsistencies seem absolutely glaring.

POD POD POD POD POD!!!!!!!  I feel like an absolute fool.  I was getting ready to send a very nice PM, and now I am very angry and embarrassed.

[Lisbeth]

I'd report the posts you have doubts about to the moderators and then leave the thread.  Questioning the poster directly, whether in the thread or by PM, can lead to flame wars and other ugliness that don't belong in the threads.

[LadyL]

What I have done when I had doubts about a posters story and thought other people were missing it was to go back through their posts and cut and paste quotes highlighting the inconsistency, and then said "You said X here and Y here - I'm confused, can you clarify?" Of course this only works if the inconsistency is within one post or several posts on the same topic, rather than across several posts on different topics.

In the case in question the poster was seriously downplaying a major detail that made their situation seem far more sympathetic/dramatic than it really was.

EDIT: the example thread posted by Perfect Circle is very similar to what I mean in terms of how I responded.

[pierrotlunaire0]

What about sending a private message to the poster you are having doubts about?

I am not sure what this would accomplish...are you expecting the person to come clean?  It would more likely add fuel to the fire, "Now, I am getting harrassed by PM!" etc.

I guess...just a suggestion.

Not the LizettaRose, but the Jhante one, there was one person who sent several PMs to the troll, which were ignored.  Then she started posting on the thread that she suspected shenanigans, and the troll denied them (although her denials made it worse in that the stories got more and more convoluted).  Finally the whole thing fell apart, but I know that a few people were hurt in that they had been emotionally invested.

[LadyPekoe]

I think sometimes the mods don't have enough "proof" to ban someone as a troll but there is plenty of evidence that they are.  And, I, personally, think posters should step up in those situations because you can SEE people getting emotionally invested.  I saw it happening with NEW and I see it happening again here.  Because a good troll picks topics that emotionally invest people, they have a billion terrible things happen constantly, and they have truncated timelines (so they post constantly), in most cases.

[Fluffy Cat]

Personally, I'd be wary of questioning posters about lying or making objectively offensive statements directly in any thread.  Generally it seems that is more likely to get one in trouble than making up stories or being offensive in the first place.  I report and then try to move on even when in most cases no visible action is taken, mostly for that reason.

[LadyL]

I think sometimes the mods don't have enough "proof" to ban someone as a troll but there is plenty of evidence that they are.  And, I, personally, think posters should step up in those situations because you can SEE people getting emotionally invested.  I saw it happening with NEW and I see it happening again here.  Because a good troll picks topics that emotionally invest people, they have a billion terrible things happen constantly, and they have truncated timelines (so they post constantly), in most cases.

I would also appreciate closure WRT posters who have been banned for these reasons. I did not know until this post that NEW was actually banned. I had discussed my concern about her story with some posters off board and had checked for new posts from her out of (morbid) curiosity, because it bothered me that so many people were expending so much energy and sympathy based on a highly improbably story. But it is at least reassuring to find out now that the mods did address it.

[Poirot]

Me too LadyL, but I fully understand why the mods don't want to get involved in such disclosure.

I am however very interested if the mods or ehelldame could give us a clearer idea how they'd like us to proceed if we are suspicious, but not comfortable with adding pointed questions to the thread.

[Hollanda]

I'd like to know as a newbie the best way to deal with this...

[Xallanthia]

Really you just notify mods, and maybe contact other posters who are getting emotionally involved, if you feel you want to do that.

The sad thing is it's difficult to do the right thing.

[Horace]

All i can say is that I'm another person who was taken in by NEW and a couple of other posters but I've only just realised they were trolling so I'm feeling a bit daft. I'd like to know what the mods say we should do in the future.