It's been a while since I posted (but I lurk every day
The good news is that Carla no longer bangs on my doors and demands rides every day, and she has only come into the house once (I forgot to close the garage door
) It was very, very cold, and raining to boot, and I felt bad when I told her "That won't be possible" when she asked for a ride.
I broke the rules a little bit, though. I told her that I wouldn't give her a ride *because* she came into my property without an invitation, and I had asked her to refrain from that.
My children are elated with their normalised morning routine, and I am very relieved that I don't get to work frazzled and in a bad mood in the mornings.
Carla asked for a ride or two since my last update, and I did give her a ride on those occasions. I am happy to help out if I am asked in advance (not ambushed in my bedroom/ shower) and if it suits my plans - but I'm not telling Carla that
There were times when I thought I would have to involve the law (* more than just asking for advice) because I felt backed into a corner and really harassed, but consistently saying "no!" and then refusing to actually give her a lift did the trick.
Thank you for all the support, I reread my original thread for ideas more than once. It gave me the determination I needed to keep going.
A positive spinoff is that I am so much more comfortable saying no to *other* things. I am slowly unlearning my doormat behaviours!
*edited to add important detail.