Interesting Assumptions and EHell

[DottyG]

I didn't quote the whole post and the background that led up to it.  I got the impression that the "we try not to" was a little more than what you may be thinking of (which, yes, I will admit freely might be an IA on my own part in reading this person's post).


 

[Zilla]

I believe I read a mod stating that at some point.

I can see why it is frowned upon. It is phrase recommended to deflect people with unwanted and inappropriate comments. When posting here, comments are appropriate. I do not think it is wise to be dismissive of your fellow board members, particularly if you are the OP coming for advice.

Also, I often see people pulling it out on other poster when someone make an assumption based on the person's post because the OP worded things clumsily or did not provide enough information. If there is something wrong with the original message, I don't think its right to blame the readers.

If someone is really making huge and inappropriate leaps, I would report it to a mod or ignore it. "What an interesting assumption" is a bit combative for this environment IMHO.

I agree.  Instead of using Interesting Assumption, I would use the words extreme or carrying it too far.  Etc.  Or agree to disagree, no need to be coy here.  But IRL, with someone you are trying to deflect, I do think its fine.  Because that is all in the tone, which is completely lost here.

[Merry Mrs Martin]

  IMHOeven it's it is being used correctly , it's a bit snarky for what should be a polite debated.  It's meant to be a little snarky. I think " That makes sense but we are only assuming that particular fact. There are other reasonable explanations" just seems much more polite.  The word interesting implies ridiculous/baseless/prejudiced too me , in this context.

   


EAT to remove a not that should not have been

[Lynn2000]

I believe I read a mod stating that at some point.

I can see why it is frowned upon. It is phrase recommended to deflect people with unwanted and inappropriate comments. When posting here, comments are appropriate. I do not think it is wise to be dismissive of your fellow board members, particularly if you are the OP coming for advice.

Also, I often see people pulling it out on other poster when someone make an assumption based on the person's post because the OP worded things clumsily or did not provide enough information. If there is something wrong with the original message, I don't think its right to blame the readers.

If someone is really making huge and inappropriate leaps, I would report it to a mod or ignore it. "What an interesting assumption" is a bit combative for this environment IMHO.

POD to this. IRL it is meant to deflect, dismiss, and otherwise end the discussion with a person who is being rude. That's pretty counterproductive behavior to engage in on a forum--if someone else on the forum is being rude, I think it's better to report them to a mod, or politely ask for clarification of the statement you find offensive, rather than just posting this very loaded phrase.

[penelope2017]

I think the point is who is "we"? I agree with Dotty that using that phrase may not be an indication it is a rule, but still implies there's been a large consensus. Which is sort of the objection to the "We." Who is we?  Especially when you don't agree with the poster making statements on behalf of the board as "we."

[DottyG]

I think the point is who is "we"? I agree with Dotty that using that phrase may not be an indication it is a rule, but still implies there's been a large consensus.

Exactly.  I can see how there are some opinions on using it or not using it here.  But I think that "we" there seems to say that we had a vote somewhere - and I apparently missed it!  Whether I agree or disagree with using the phrase here, I still would have liked a vote before I became a part of the "we" that was used!

So maybe change my initial question in this thread from "should we use IA for posters here" to "should we automatically use the word "we" when not everyone may have participated in the election"?
 
 

[O'Dell]

What I see as the misuse of the phrase lately has had me wanting that "ignore" feature that we were promised/threatened with! When it pops out at me is when someone uses it in place of "I don't agree with your assumption".

The use of the "royal we" might not have been ideal, but I agree with the sentiment. It's a phrase meant to shut someone down by pointing out that their assumption could be and very likely is wrong. It's meant to be a conversation killer. That isn't appropriate here.

And I too remember a conversation about this before where many people stated that they agreed that it should be avoided, so it's not as if the person pulled the comment from a deep dark mysterious place.

[Wavicle]

I am not sure which mod said it and I cannot find it, but I do recall a post by a mod saying that it is not to be used against other forum members.

Someone inappropriately scolding other posters is another thing to report the the mods. We are expected to self moderate to a point though, so I don't think it is inappropriate to comment on someone slightly crossing the line in a way that could help diffuse the situation.

[Lisbeth]

Speaking for myself, I've gotten tired of this phrase.  It might work outside of Ehell on certain people in certain situations (the ones it was suggested to address), but here in the forum, it does come off as very snarky.

[O'Dell]

If the issue is the person's use of "we" then why don't you just send the person a PM objecting?

[DottyG]

If the issue is the person's use of "we" then why don't you just send the person a PM objecting?

Because I initially didn't realize that's what was catching my eye when I read the post.  And because I still think it's a valid thing to discuss, as this is not the first "royal we" that has appeared in the forum.

[PrincessInPink]

I think the point is who is "we"? I agree with Dotty that using that phrase may not be an indication it is a rule, but still implies there's been a large consensus.

Exactly.  I can see how there are some opinions on using it or not using it here.  But I think that "we" there seems to say that we had a vote somewhere - and I apparently missed it!  Whether I agree or disagree with using the phrase here, I still would have liked a vote before I became a part of the "we" that was used!

So maybe change my initial question in this thread from "should we use IA for posters here" to "should we automatically use the word "we" when not everyone may have participated in the election"?

Good point. I can see what you mean. I do agree that saying "we" do this or that implies that there's been been some sort of consensus, and I have noticed that popping up in multiple threads.

[Elfmama]

Ok, is it all right to use it of our own assumptions?  For instance Member X posts a complaint about her neighbor's yapdog and how should she approach the neighbor to make it stop. Someone else asks why she lets it bother her. If I know that Member X has a night job, I  might say "I'm making the interesting assumption that Member X doesn't care to have her daytime sleep constantly interrupted."

[DottyG]

Ok, is it all right to use it of our own assumptions?  For instance Member X posts a complaint about her neighbor's yapdog and how should she approach the neighbor to make it stop. Someone else asks why she lets it bother her. If I know that Member X has a night job, I  might say "I'm making the interesting assumption that Member X doesn't care to have her daytime sleep constantly interrupted."

I don't see that it'd be snarky in reference to ourselves.  We do know if we're making an interesting assumption of someone or something.  I made one above myself.  I acknowledged it.

[Merry Mrs Martin]

  The next thread I read was the one OP quoted , I don't think posted quoter was out of line.  I do believe most posters here would of disagreed with it's use in this case.  I think rarely "we" is appropriate and have seen it used in a positive manner.

OP did you disagree "that's an intresting assumption " was an inappropriately snarky responce? (I think that's what quoted poster meant..."don't get mad at us because we disagree withyou") or take issue with the use of "we"?