General Etiquette > Life...in general

A Few 'Welcome' Thoughts

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amznprincess:
I came across an article recently that talked about how while 'please' and 'thank you' are still in general use 'you're welcome' is getting rare, and have noticed this myself - it's very common to see an exchange like the following:

Cashier: ...and, thank you for shopping at ____. ::hands over grocery bags:
Customer: No, thank you.

So, I started to think about what this shift means, and whether it's really a bad thing.  Often, it seems to be used to show an egalitarian mindset.  A cashier or other service person may be grateful for our business, but it's as valid to say we ought to be grateful to them for the service/help they've provided.  That perspective, if genuine, I can't condemn.  'Thank You' - 'You're Welcome' still has a place when there is a clear receiver and giver of some boon (such as a gift or an excellent letter of recommendation) but I think we may be right to reconsider the old script in other situations.

Bijou:
That going back and forth about who should thank whom is really silly. 
I really detest that "No problem." has replaced "You're welcome." in the business world.  They assume I think I am troubling them by asking them to do their job...no....I expect them to do their job, which happens to be helping me!!  I am thanking them because I'm polite and appreciative, not because I think I am bothering them.  Guess this should go in pet peeves but it applies here, also.

Lauren:
I think it depends on the situation. The example you've given is one where if the cashier got a "You're welcome" as a repsonse, she'd probably think the person was a wanker. Saying thank you back is the nice/polite thing to do.

Other situations, if I thank someone I don't want to be thanked back. A you're welcome, is all that's needed.

sempronialou:
For me it depends on the situation.  If a person thanks me for doing or bring something or one of my patients thanks me for coming to see them that day (I work for a hospice), I say "you're welcome." If a cashier or sales person thanks me for shopping at their place of business, I tend to say "thank you for your help" or something to that effect. Usually they tell me to have a nice day, so I say "you too."

amznprincess:

--- Quote ---They assume I think I am troubling them by asking them to do their job...no....I expect them to do their job, which happens to be helping me!!
--- End quote ---

I'm a little unsure here as to whether the 'them' is coworkers or service people.  Still, I would point out that we thank people in many situations - such as passing the salt and pepper at a meal - where they have gone to no 'real' trouble for us, and couldn't be seen as bothering them (barring, say, having interrupted them or someone they're talking to to ask). 

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