Etiquette School is in session! > The Ehell Guide to Never Behaving Badly

University Etiquette

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It is bad form to do your yoga exercises while blocking the hallway outside a classroom door. Find a dead end hallway to do it in, or better yet, the rec and wellness center yoga room!

Been a while since I graduated, but a couple stand out:

- Partying is fine, but it must be done in moderation. If your drinking is interfering with things like taking tests, you need to seek help.
A roomate of mine spent at least 1/2 a semester drunk or hung over. She missed a final because of a hangover but managed to talk the prof into rescheduling it. What did she do? She got good and drunk the night before the rescheduled test and missed it AGAIN. Not surprisingly, she was put on academic probation and later flunked out.

- Do your share of group work or get dropped from the final grade.
We had a group member blow off all the work. The ONLY thing responsibility we gave her was to deliver the completed project to the prof (because the other group members couldn't because of work or early morning classes on the other side of campus). She couldn't even do that. We told the prof exactly what happened and she received zero points for the final projectó50% of the grade. (Thankfully, the prof was understanding and gave us deserving group members full credit. The slacker's excuse? "Oh, I forgot.")

In an on-campus computer lab/the university library, you do not get to "save" seats for friends who are "using this computer". (As in, the friend hasn't arrived and there is nobody actually sitting there using the computer.)
Especially if there is a queue to use said computers.
Especially during high-traffic times when there are no other computers free.
My presence trumps your friend "coming". If they're not here and not logged on, they're not using the computer.

Please don't talk/make noise/do anything else distracting during, or throughout, a lecture.
You've finished compulsory education, and are now (hopefully), an adult attending university by choice. As in, you don't actually have to be here. It's rude to the lecturer, and to everyone else. Very few of the subjects I've done have taken attendance in lectures (arts subjects), so you could have just gone to the pub to continue your conversation if you didn't actually want to learn.

[Basically, please don't do anything that will affect anyone's learning or grades than your own.
You may be happy to scrape through with minimum effort, but it's not fair to drag other people down. So pull your weight in group projects. Don't troll/bait people when they're trying to get something done. Don't treat the library as a common room to brag about last night's party when there's a pub/social gathering area 30 seconds down the path.

Disabled students do not have it "easy".
Support is put in place to put disabled students on a level playing field. They (we) are NOT "lazy/thick/entitled/making stuff up/scamming the system" to get "free laptops", extra time in exams, note-takers, etc. You want the "benefit"?  >:( Take the disability with it. Trust me, we'd really rather not be disabled.

Your classmates do not "owe" you notes.
I've given my notes to classmates before. Some of them have helped me out the same way. But it was occasional, not habitual, and something we did as friends if the other person had missed the lecture due to illness or something. The notes were not handed out to strangers by hardworking students because Jimmy went to this awesome party last night and decided to sleep in. That's rude. If you can't be bothered to make the class, then expect someone to give you the notes they struggled in for 9am to take, you are insulting them. You are basically saying, "I had better stuff to do than be in class, but you didn't, schmuck."

Don't be the drunken idiot who everyone has to carry home. Or if you are, at least be grateful.
I only had one incident of extreme drunkenness where some friends had to take me back to my room. Fortunately, it was on campus, in the building next to my dorm (the central building housed the student bar). I tried cider for the first time and liked it, but then forgot that I shouldn't mix. (I'm not a heavyweight drinker.) It was only the second (and last!) time in my life that I'd ever been drunk enough to need taking home, and I thanked my friends profusely.
My "friend" J, on the other hand, was the opposite. (He and I are no longer friends.) J likes to drink. He drinks to the point that he blacks out, pretty much every weekend. At one point he got kicked out of the same club 2 weekends in a row for being drunk and disorderly, and starting a fight. You constantly have to watch him and stop him punching some innocent bystander for some perceived slight. Anyway, most nights out, he has to be carried home. One night, the "friend" J was clubbing with, dumped a drunken, almost-passed-out J on a mutual friend of ours, C (who had only recently arrived, and had one drink) who got him in a taxi and took him home. By the time he got in the front door, J couldn't even remember having been in the taxi 30 seconds ago. J's housemate of the time (another friend of ours) literally had to watch him all night to make sure he didn't choke on his own vomit. When it was suggested that J should be grateful to C for getting him home, and apologise for spoiling C's night, J complained indignantly, "Why? He didn't have to, did he? He could have just left me there!"  ::)   >:(  Um, no. We all know that C, like most normal people, has a conscience. C wasn't going to just leave J lying in the gutter, alone, at night, unable to even remember his own name, for goodness knows what to happen to him.
So, yeah. If you're drinking, that's fine. Being carried home occasionally by friends is acceptable dependent on friendship groups etc, but it really gets to be a pain if you're doing it EVERY time you go out. We want to have a good time too. Also, please note that if you need looking after EVERY time we go out for a drink, invitations will soon disappear.

People with cars are not your personal taxi service/chauffeur.
If your friend/housemate has a car, and OFFERS you a lift, or suggests you grocery shop together and put the shopping in the car, it's OK to accept. But it's not a constitutional right (or polite) to demand they drive you somewhere whenever you please. If you want a car, pay for one yourself.

Taking a degree in something does not make you a leading expert.
I used to know a guy who bragged all the time about how he was a "BMusEd" student. (His degree was Musical Education, and he wanted to become a high school music teacher.) But he has such a superiority complex about it. He thinks his degree makes him the authority on schools, and on music. ANY piece of music you hear, be it on the radio, TV, in a club, whatever, he'll immediately start telling you what key it's in, and start criticising something about it - it's flat/off key/the artist has a lousy voice.  ::) And unless you did his course, even if you play several instruments to a high standard AND know all the theory, AND teach music, you can't possibly know as much as him.
He also thought he was a leading authority on schools, because he did a few weeks' placement in order to get the class credits. He'd always make a HUGE deal out of something small, then when I commented saying he was making a mountain out of a molehill and the topic was basic common sense rather than actual law, he tried patronising me. Um, I've worked in schools longer than he has, plus my mother has been a high school teacher for 20+ years. Trust me, I know things.
So, yeah... don't feel you have to know everything. Just because you're studying, say, English Lit, doesn't mean you're expected to know the complete works of Shakespeare off by heart.

Don't out people. Or mock them.
For a fair number of the LGBTQ community, university is the first time they've been able to find people who "get" their issues, or who are openly gay or whatever. Sometimes it's the first time they've had the opportunity to date like the rest of their peers. For some, such as transgendered people, it's the first opportunity some of them have to be in control of their own gender identity.
However, just because they're out to YOU, doesn't mean they're out to everyone. Sometimes their family doesn't know, or doesn't approve. Sometimes they just don't want their sexuality/gender identity/confusion etc to be a big deal, or the subject of hot gossip across campus. Whatever the reason, it's not your place to "out" someone.
Also, don't mock. If you don't understand something, or don't know how to support someone going through issues, just ask the LGBTQ society. Most likely there will be someone willing to explain things you're not sure of. And no, you don't have to be gay to go to a meeting!  :P

You are an adult, and the university aren't mind-readers.
If there's a problem, the uni will generally bend over backwards to try and help you. But if you want an appointment with the counsellor, for example, you have to book it - they don't know you'll want to see them. This isn't like high school, where you have a homeroom teacher or whoever to set you up with a meeting there. Nor is it your mum's job to call the faculty.
When I had problems in my personal life that were affecting my studies, the university were amazingly helpful - when I told them I was having problems. Until I told them, all they knew was that I wasn't turning up to tutorials or handing in much work. When I emailed my adviser to actually ask for help, she was amazing.


--- Quote from: purplerainbow on October 06, 2013, 05:15:14 PM ---In an on-campus computer lab/the university library, you do not get to "save" seats for friends who are "using this computer". (As in, the friend hasn't arrived and there is nobody actually sitting there using the computer.)
Especially if there is a queue to use said computers.
Especially during high-traffic times when there are no other computers free.
My presence trumps your friend "coming". If they're not here and not logged on, they're not using the computer.

--- End quote ---

Related to this:

* If it's a deadline day, and people are obviously looking for computers to print off assignments and time is ticking away (We had to hand in assignments by 12pm on the day of the dealine. Even a minute after and you got a 0), hogging a computer for the sole purpose of checking Facebook is a really jerkish thing to do
* For the love of all that is sacred and holy, when you are done with a computer, LOG OFF OF IT. There is nothing more frustrating that thinking you've found a computer only to discover that someone logged in, got what they needed and left, and now if I want to use it I'll have to wait 30 minutes for the auto log-out to kick in.


--- Quote from: snowdragon on September 04, 2013, 11:30:25 PM ---A student's ADA accommodations override your prohibitions of anything - recording, "guests" or what have you.  If you can't deal with the fact that a student might be LD enough to need to record rather the write notes, or need a sign language interpreter or notes in braille and a seeing eye dog - get over it or don't teach but you can't deny a student documented accommodations for any reason.
--- End quote ---

I asked to be allowed to record as an ADA accommodation, along with some other accommodation requests. My academic advisor (I was also taking the class she taught) took me into her office after the first class of the year and said that in the 'real world' of the field we were in, I would have to learn to do without those, so I wouldn't be allowed them in class (meaning any of my classes.)

She was incredibly intimidating to argue with, just because of her persuasive skills, which actually made her brilliant in teaching the subject she taught, and I ended up loving her classes.

When I shared with other students the story of being denied permission to record, they brought up some of the ulterior motives we've discussed here, primarily, "She doesn't want you selling her lectures on the black market."


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