Need Response For Unwanted Gifts

[Ms_Cellany]

Hawai'ian/Flame shirts?

I'll take them!

*boxes them up and sends them your way*

I'm actually quite serious. Hope they're 2X!

Or if they're smaller, The Sweetie can wear them in her drag persona, Vinnie. Vinnie loves tacky shirts.

Pix or it didn't happen. 

Will have to get them off my home computer. But I can throw you a bit of her routine:

(done in a fierce Joisey accent)

"So, when dey axed me to come here, dey sed the audience would be women who love women. I t'ought, 'Cool! I love women too!  I love dem magazines!'

But I gotta say, when I got here, I t'ought, 'Hm. Da women here don't look like da women in da magazines. Youse guys look more....square.'"

"square" is pronounced "skway-yuh" and comes with hand gestures.

[Shiraz_Much?]

 

Love it!

[Wonderflonium]

 

[Bibi]

Look, if he says he doesn't want them but won't donate or throw them out you must hush up and endure.  He doesn't care.  You must forget it.

[dks64]

Look, if he says he doesn't want them but won't donate or throw them out you must hush up and endure.  He doesn't care.  You must forget it.

But I can't. They're so bad  And a HUGE turnoff.

[Twik]

You know, I think people end up doing what they want. And if your BF insists on wearing these shirts, I suspect it's that he actually likes them, or at least not having to buy other shirts.

If this is a huge turnoff, perhaps you need to consider another BF. However, before you go that far, how about *you* buying him a good number of shirts that you would like him to wear? Tell him that it'll hurt *your* feelings if he doesn't wear them.

The results should tell you a lot about his style preferences, as well as how he will treat you compared to others, in future.

[dks64]

You know, I think people end up doing what they want. And if your BF insists on wearing these shirts, I suspect it's that he actually likes them, or at least not having to buy other shirts.

If this is a huge turnoff, perhaps you need to consider another BF. However, before you go that far, how about *you* buying him a good number of shirts that you would like him to wear? Tell him that it'll hurt *your* feelings if he doesn't wear them.

The results should tell you a lot about his style preferences, as well as how he will treat you compared to others, in future.

I did! I bought him 4 new shirts. He does only wear the ugly ones when he has nothing left, so to me, it sounds more like laziness on washing clothes. He's a typical guy, waiting until there's nothing left to do laundry. We plan on moving in together in January or February, I'll make sure the laundry gets washed regularly. Then we'll know for sure. I do notice that the shirts I bought him are at the bottom of the hamper, so he does like to wear those first. They fit him too, the shirts he gets from others tend to be a little too big (width wise). It's not flattering to his lean shape.

[LazyDaisy]

Who normally does the laundry? I'm not SUGGESTING that you purposely ruin the BF's clothing, but accidents involving knocked over bleach bottles or mysteriously appearing ink/grease/paint stains have been known to happen.

[dks64]

Who normally does the laundry? I'm not SUGGESTING that you purposely ruin the BF's clothing, but accidents involving knocked over bleach bottles or mysteriously appearing ink/grease/paint stains have been known to happen.

I'm not gutsy enough to do that and honestly, even with an ink stain, as long as his work apron covered it, he would probably still wear it.  I'm just going to make sure he has nice, clean shirts at all time. Problem solved... or those shirts or getting torched  I've shown up to his place and washed his clothes before because I can't stand looking at an overflowing laundry basket. I'm a neat freak with mild OCD.

[gramma dishes]

Somehow things like that always get accidentally torn -- in some incredibly conspicuous place.

Then they become shirts that are great for washing walls, cars, and dog poop off the bottom of our shoes.   

[Wendy Moira Angela Pan]

Don't ruin his stuff because you don't like it! How would you feel if he did that to you. That would be a dealbreaker for me. A partner who intentionally sabatoged my posessions would be out on their ear befor they could say, "Ooops a mistake accident!"

[dks64]

Don't ruin his stuff because you don't like it! How would you feel if he did that to you. That would be a dealbreaker for me. A partner who intentionally sabatoged my posessions would be out on their ear befor they could say, "Ooops a mistake accident!"

Like I said, I wouldn't do that, I will just keep his nice clothes clean so he has no excuse. Then once they've been sitting in his closet for a while, he'll have to get rid of them because he's not using them and they're taking up space

[Yvaine]

Don't ruin his stuff because you don't like it! How would you feel if he did that to you. That would be a dealbreaker for me. A partner who intentionally sabatoged my posessions would be out on their ear befor they could say, "Ooops a mistake accident!"

I agree. I've always resolved to never become one of the wives who throws out her husband's old shirts. Whenever I've had an SO who wore ratty old clothes, I left those alone but made sure to keep giving them good-looking clothes as gifts and then complimenting said SO's hotness in the outfit. 

[LazyDaisy]

I'm sorry if my post offended people. I was joking, of course. This isn't a case of the OP hating her BF's favorite clothes and wanting to change him whether he's willing or not.

The BF claims to also hate the "gifts," but doesn't want to hurt his stepfather and coworkers feelings; it would provide HIM with a way out of wearing the shirts without having to say to the givers "I think you have awful taste in clothes and I don't want your gift." Even if the shirts aren't really ruined, they can disappear and if asked about, they "got ruined in the wash," or while working on the car or doing yard work etc. rather than thrown away or donated.

[VorFemme]

Possibility 1: I have to say that if his coworkers keep giving him shirts of a certain type then my suspicion is that they don't feel that he is dressing appropriately for work and are trying to give him a hint. If that is the case he needs to find a look that combines his preferences with what work considers appropriate and then the gifts should dry up.

No, it's not like that. He works for Home Depot and any collared shirt is fine. The ones he wears are a million times nicer than the ugly Hawaiian/Flame shirts.

Possibility 2: Perhaps he is wearing previously given old man shirts to work and so they think that is his preference. If that's the case then he needs to stop wearing them to work and then their gifts may fall in line with his preferences.

That's one of the problems, he wears them to be nice, even though he admits they're not the nicest shirts in his wardrobe and they're "everything else is dirty" shirts.

Possibility 3: Your boyfriend actually likes these kinds of shirts and is trying to be 'cool' to impress you. Then there's nothing to be done.

He says he really doesn't. What's worse... I thought one of the Hawaiian shirts belonged to his Mom because it looked like a woman's shirt. I was horrified  I'm not even a person big on fashion, but these shirts... my gosh, horrible.

Time for a terrible accident in the laundry with the worst of these - a bleach spill, the sleeve gets wrapped under the agitator & rips, or possibly you try ironing the shirt & scorch it..............

Or just clean the closet and toss the OLD shirts into a box - the box could be for the local charity thrift shop, it could be for cleaning rags, or it could be taken to the local pound to be used as bedding material (cut off the buttons). 

If he feels like he needs a shirt or two of last resort - pick the least ugly............