Don't eat the meatballs! AKA: Stupid stuff you've done.

[LadyJaneinMD]

Having some things on your mind + fixing microwave popcorn = absentmindedly hitting the "Quick Min." button instead of the "Popcorn" button and ending up with about a half cup of popcorn and a bunch of unpopped kernels. Oops.

That's easy enough to fix, though.  Just hit the 'popcorn' button again and stand by the microwave and listen.  When the pops get to be less than one pop a second, it's almost done.  Count to 10 and open the microwave.  it's pretty simple.

I've learned that lots of tiem the 'popcorn' button isn't quite long enough and I could use maybe 30 seconds more.   It's better than wasting popcorn, isn't it?

[CrochetFanatic]

That's what I ended up doing, but I still felt pretty silly.  And I just thought of another one.  Two days in a row, I turned on the coffee pot only to come back to find it cold and empty.  I had forgotten to plug it in.  My brother got a good laugh out of that one.

[mmswm]

That's what I ended up doing, but I still felt pretty silly.  And I just thought of another one.  Two days in a row, I turned on the coffee pot only to come back to find it cold and empty.  I had forgotten to plug it in.  My brother got a good laugh out of that one.

This is much better than my father's favorite trick.  The carafe for their coffee maker is solid stainless steel.  You can't see what's inside. It's also a 3 minute "quick brew" maker.  Once or twice a month, he goes to make the coffee, forgets to check if there's any old coffee in the pot and starts it.  The result is a huge mess of coffee all over the counter and floor.

[Diane AKA Traska]

The Six Month Double Cheeseburger

So today, I'm trying to figure out lunch, and I see (as I often do) a double cheeseburger we bought at least half a year ago.  It's been int he fridge (not the freezer) that entire time.  We keep passing it, and after a certain time it basically became One With The Fridge.  That is, it was almost decorative.  I decided enough was enough.  I was going to open it, and decide do I throw it away, or eat it?

I open it, and inspect for signs of decay.  Bun is soft and free of growth.  Cheese is pliable.  Meat smells normal.  So I plunk it into the microwave, figuring that if it smells off, I can chuck it.  It smelled good.  I don't mean not bad, I mean tasty.  So...

I ate it.

Give it a few hours, and I'll update with just how stupid this idea was, but I've eaten more questionable things in the past.  (As a teen, shimmery ham leaps to mind).

[lilfox]

Chopped an onion that was starting to get old with a knife that was much duller than I thought.  I went a little too quickly and the knife skidded across the surface and landed on my finger.  It only caused a little nick, and my first thought was "wow I'm glad it wasn't sharper!"

My second thought was "a sharper knife wouldn't have slipped in the first place.". 

[Outdoor Girl]

The Six Month Double Cheeseburger

So today, I'm trying to figure out lunch, and I see (as I often do) a double cheeseburger we bought at least half a year ago.  It's been int he fridge (not the freezer) that entire time.  We keep passing it, and after a certain time it basically became One With The Fridge.  That is, it was almost decorative.  I decided enough was enough.  I was going to open it, and decide do I throw it away, or eat it?

I open it, and inspect for signs of decay.  Bun is soft and free of growth.  Cheese is pliable.  Meat smells normal.  So I plunk it into the microwave, figuring that if it smells off, I can chuck it.  It smelled good.  I don't mean not bad, I mean tasty.  So...

I ate it.

Give it a few hours, and I'll update with just how stupid this idea was, but I've eaten more questionable things in the past.  (As a teen, shimmery ham leaps to mind).

I think this should be cross posted in both the 'What Brave Things Have You Done' and the 'Gross out' threads.   

[Shalamar]

I should tell my buddy about that burger.   He and I once went out for dinner, and a couple of days later I brought the leftovers from my meal for lunch.  They'd been in my fridge for the entire time.  He asked what I was having for lunch, and when I told him, he sputtered "Are you CRAZY?  You'll get food poisoning!"  "What?  Those leftovers are only two days old!"  "EXACTLY!  You should throw them out!"  "Uh, no, I'm not going to do that."

I ate 'em, and I was fine. 

[random numbers]

The Six Month Double Cheeseburger

So today, I'm trying to figure out lunch, and I see (as I often do) a double cheeseburger we bought at least half a year ago.  It's been int he fridge (not the freezer) that entire time.  We keep passing it, and after a certain time it basically became One With The Fridge.  That is, it was almost decorative.  I decided enough was enough.  I was going to open it, and decide do I throw it away, or eat it?

I open it, and inspect for signs of decay.  Bun is soft and free of growth.  Cheese is pliable.  Meat smells normal.  So I plunk it into the microwave, figuring that if it smells off, I can chuck it.  It smelled good.  I don't mean not bad, I mean tasty.  So...

I ate it.

Give it a few hours, and I'll update with just how stupid this idea was, but I've eaten more questionable things in the past.  (As a teen, shimmery ham leaps to mind).

I give you a twelve year hamburger:

http://aht.seriouseats.com/archives/2008/09/12-year-old-mcdonalds-hamburger-still-looking-good.html

[ica171]

Cooked hamburger patties are relatively low moisture, so that's why the McDonald's cheeseburger and Diane's didn't get moldy. I don't know that I'd eat a six month old cheeseburger even if I didn't see mold, though (but a cheeseburger wouldn't last six days in my house).

[Diane AKA Traska]

UPDATE:

I still function!

More importantly, other than some minor gas, the burger does not seem to have negatively impacted me.  Yay for science!

[mbbored]

Don't attempt to walk down stairs in stilettos while drinking from a glass bottle.

Fortunately I managed to fling the Coke bottle across my living room and throw my other hand out so I didn't slam my head into the door frame opposite my stairs. Now I have a sprained thumb, a series of bruises up one side of my body, a scraped shin (how I did that I don't know) and freshly mopped floors.

[Amara]

Don't attempt to walk down stairs in stilettos while drinking from a glass bottle.

Fortunately I managed to fling the Coke bottle across my living room and throw my other hand out so I didn't slam my head into the door frame opposite my stairs. Now I have a sprained thumb, a series of bruises up one side of my body, a scraped shin (how I did that I don't know) and freshly mopped floors.

Following up on that, I can add: Don't move a wine rack without emptying it first. If you do, you take a chance that it will snag on something, spill some of the bottles out whereupon one will break and spray (good) red wine all over the floor, counters, shoes, walls, and rugs. When you get down to clean it up, you will use at least one sheet, one bath towel, a full roll of paper towels, a cupful of vinegar, and even then you will have a cloud of red wine hanging about your head for two full days afterward, making you sick. Oh, and be sure to wash that bathrobe you were wearing. Alone. In cold water. First. Then throw out the bath towel and sheet. The trash collectors might have opinions about your lifestyle when they come on Monday mornings but never mind that.

[CrochetFanatic]

Tonight I burned the rice because I forgot to turn the heat down to let it simmer.  I've never done that before (I swear!), and up until then I was feeling pretty pleased with how efficiently I was managing my time and three hot pots.  What I got was a nasty mess in one pan, a burned thumb, and a boiling temper.

The rest of the meal was good, though.  I didn't want rice anyway. 

[Gyburc]

That's like telling someone "Don't slip", then promptly landing on your behind.

ROFL!  Oh, I've done that!!  When I was working at a fast-food place, long, long ago, the person before me had not emptied out the grease trap to the grill.  So I emptied it, then mopped up the spilled grease so no one would slip on the greasy floor.
Then I promptly slipped on the wet floor.   And landed ON THE GRILL.

The burned arm took 2 years to heal properly.

I used to lead a team at Habitat for Humanity. One day I was giving my usual safety lecture, winding up as usual with "And don't get hurt because the nearest ER is 30 minutes away!", then promptly slipped and fell into a ditch filled with broken cement blocks. I gave myself a concussion and ripped a whole in my leg down to the muscle. Then I got to give an impromptu first aid course and directions to said nearest ER.

I know of someone who teaches historical swordsmanship, and was giving a class, using live steel (a sharp replica sword). I believe he had just covered the safety aspects before he shifted from one stance into another, and in the process stabbed the sharp sword quite deeply into his own thigh.

I'm afraid to say the gentleman in question wasn't terribly popular, and as a result this has now become legend. 

[siamesecat2965]

Mine is minor, but still very annoying. I cleaned on Sat, then went to work from 5-9. After I got home, all i had to do was put clean sheets on my bed. So its about midnight, and i set my clock ahead, making it almost 1am. I change my sheets, make the bed nicely, and go to put the "dirty" ones in the hamper. ONly to find the fitted sheet is missing. I had neglected to remove it and made the bed OVER it. I thought about it, then just pulled it all apart and started over. Note to self: change sheets when you're more awake.