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Author Topic: When you smash up my car, please let me know...  (Read 12011 times)

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Tea Drinker

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Re: When you smash up my car, please let me know...
« Reply #30 on: February 27, 2013, 08:45:42 AM »
Coworker is still pretty upset with her friend.
Borrower is arranging to pay the deductible, and the Borrower driver also got points against his license.

Coworker knows that she can't demand an apology. However, she would still like to convey her feelings of disappointment to her friend, but she's really at a loss of what to say.

Any suggestions for wording, either by phone, face or email?

So, to recap:
1. The Smashers smashed up 2 of the CW's vehicles.
2. They didn't bother to stop and tell anyone; in fact they went right on w/ their day, driving the now-damaged truck.
3. They only told the CW's son when he came over to see their DD, in an offhanded 'oh btw we smashed your car' sort of way.
4. They've uttered no apologies.
5. They're paying the deductible. No mention of covering the increase in rates for the next 3-5 years (# based on my experience in US)

Wow.  :o  >:(  :o 

Obviously, since they have no clue how to drive a truck, they never get to borrow one again. Nor a car, since they have no qualms about causing an accident and keeping it quiet. I think if I were CW I'd be mourning the friendship even as I go ballistic over this behavior.

Maybe the solution is for her son to talk to the Smashers--since they damaged his car too, and he's the one they told, and they're his almost-inlaws--and say that it's not cool what they did, it's not cool that they kept it quiet, and it's not cool that they're not paying all the damages. And that his mom is really hurt and wondering if they're really her friends. Maybe that'll snap them out of their bubble of selfishness.

I totally agree with this that the son should say something. Honestly if I was the son, I'd be questioning my involvement with the whole family. If the parents or their daughter got upset that I stood up for myself and my parents, then I'd say see ya later because honestly, anyone who can behave that poorly is not someone I would want to spend the rest of my life with. If she didn't stand up to her parents with me, then that would be a big wake up call.

In the son's shoes, I would talk to my girlfriend and see what she said, but not assume that she would take her parents' side. A surprising number of selfish or thoughtless people manage to have good, thoughtful adult children.
Any advice that requires the use of a time machine may safely be ignored.