I have an entitled aunt like this (expects everyone to cater to her whims). Aunt's twelve brothers and sisters endured her behavior for years...until Grandma died a few years ago (my heritage is such that respect is a big deal so if Grandma, their mother, wished to include Aunt, then it had to be done). We had one more incident of horrible behavior from her and her precious oldest son one Easter that resulted in the entire family being so upset by what took place there were no family parties the rest of the year. When the family parties started up again, Aunt and her entire branch of her family were excluded and continue to be excluded to this day (it's been 4-5 years now). I think the only family member who still speaks to Aunt is my mother (one of her sisters), and Mom will only deal with her on a limited basis and only when it suits Mom (Aunt even tried to go through me to force Mom to call her, which resulted in me blocking Aunt from being able to contact me again as I found Aunt's repeated requests rather intrusive). Aunt is in her 60s, and Cousin is in his 40s. They are never going to change; we all (the family) could only change how we react to their behavior. I think Sam should never invite Tonya to another family event he hosts as she clearly can't be trusted. There might be pressure from other parts of the family, but he'll need to stand his ground until they back off or learn to do the same. I know without Aunt and Cousin around, the rest of the family no longer needs to worry about drama because the *only* drama came from Aunt and Cousin (I have two other cousins, her kids and Cousin's brothers, who are normal but if they get invited, then that'll bring along Aunt and Cousin so all are excluded).