Author Topic: Your holiday hill to die on.  (Read 249774 times)

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Amara

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Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #645 on: November 20, 2013, 01:52:40 PM »
Free Range Hippy Chick, that is the best idea ever! I am actually quite excited about it because I am hoping to get Bingo. First, though, I will have to create the card and think of all the things I can put on it. If I do I think I deserve a special prize for what I plan to be my impeccable Ehell behavior.

Our family never exchanged gifts among cousins and nieces/nephews. That decision was made by my parents' generation once the first child--me--came along. The parents agreed to exchange a couple of gifts among themselves as siblings but nothing else. So it's always seemed odd to me to see how many other people actually do this.



KenveeB

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Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #646 on: November 20, 2013, 01:56:53 PM »
My cut-off is when the nieces/nephews are no longer in school full-time.  If they aren't going to school full-time, then they should get a full-time job and buy their own stuff.  I spend only $10 - $20 per kid anyway.

In my extended family, the aunts and uncles bought for the kids and did a name-draw exchange among themselves. You get one year grace period after high school, then you're an adult. It worked fine, except everyone struggled what to do once the great-nieces and nephews started arriving. Last year we finally agreed to have the kids do a name draw among each other like the adults do.

On the Bingo card, I made one with all the embarrassing childhood stories that my family likes to drag out and tell about me. (And only me. My brother doesn't get the stories.) When I get a bingo, I get to treat myself to some item on my Amazon wish list. :) It keeps me from getting frustrated, upset, and angry about the stories.

Valentines Mommy

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Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #647 on: November 20, 2013, 02:23:08 PM »
To update my situation: phone calls were made last night. DH and I are exhausted but our families of origin understand that we are NOT going to visit for Thanksgiving.

We are still working on fortifying our spines as neither side is recognizing that we are not visiting for Christmas. Mom is already packed and ready for her current guilt trip. MIL is about to join her. No, no, non, jamais, nein, etc. I am not going home this year.

nutraxfornerves

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Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #648 on: November 20, 2013, 02:33:41 PM »
I plan on opting out of Christmas festivities with anyone else - DH and I are putting up a "booze tree". Our regular pre-lit tree decorated with ornaments and those tiny airline bottles of booze in flavors/kinds we haven't tried before tied to the branches with ribbons.  We plan on making Christmas morning a cocktail hour and keep track of the good, the bad, and the "Dear God NO!" from the booze. 

I fully expect us to be asleep by noon.
My mother did this for Easter baskets for adults. In addition to the itty bitty bottles, she included booze-filled chocolates.

Nutrax
The plural of anecdote is not data

cwm

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Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #649 on: November 20, 2013, 04:04:29 PM »
http://print-bingo.com/

So I can go to THAT website at work, but not http://bingocardgenerator.org because the second promotes online gambling. But the first...doesn't? Okay then.

Well, I'm going to leave these here in case people need someone else to make cards for them.

gingerzing

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Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #650 on: November 20, 2013, 05:30:44 PM »
Bingo cards. The solution is bingo cards.

* arriving just as you put away the last spoon and asking insincerely if they can help with the dishes.



*asking 'did you not make any [some foodstuff that you have made religiously every Christmas since 1942 and thrown away untouched every Boxing Day because nobody actually likes it]'.


Thing of beauty. 
I use to Bingo card at work during department meetings.  Mostly just key phrases.

Also do not forget -
Family says to come to their house at noon but they don't actually serve ANY food until 8PM.   (Sadly this was not a holiday meal)

For comment in red - I can't count this one since my DH does this every time I clean up in the kitchen. 
Though it could also be done as "You are just putting finishing touches on the last of the meal when someone comes in and asks if you need any help with dinner"  (Again happens about once a week with DH and dinner)

Purple comment - my mother actually did broke the cycle of oyster dressing for her family.  We live in a landlock state so oysters are $$$.  The only people in the family that liked oysters were my great grandparents (who were dead several years at this point) and great uncle (in California) who came to Thanksgiving about once every 4-6 years.  Mom refused to make it.  General hue and cry.  Then she asked her aunts and parents (my great aunties and grandparents) if they actually liked it.  Well, NO but we ALWAYS have it.  yesh.   ::)

Editeer

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Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #651 on: November 20, 2013, 05:41:11 PM »
This is a great thread!

For more than 20 years, I've flown across the continent twice a year for family holidays. (I've skipped a few holidays, but just a few.) My parents are now in their 80s and no longer live in their own home. So now I not only travel, but have to get a hotel, rent a car, etc. My parents pay for it--they pay for all of us kids to visit (their choice, and I very much appreciate their generosity). When my parents are gone, however,  Things Will Change. I will not pay $3000 twice a year and use up precious vacation time so I can spend two days on a plane and be ignored by my siblings.

 >:(

JennJenn68

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Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #652 on: November 20, 2013, 05:50:07 PM »
I'm so happy that I'm not the only one who has decided that this year, Christmas Day is just for me, my DH and DS.  My in-laws are with my SIL's side of the family (it's done this way every odd-numbered year) and my dad and his wife are down in Florida for the winter.  I'm going to have to polish my spine when it come's to my brother's wife, though--I refuse to spend Christmas Day pretending that everything is peachy-keen and dandy with her and my brother, although I know that he hasn't lived in that house for over a year now, and in fact has been living with his girlfriend for six months and more. ::)

It's sad.  I feel sorry for my niece and nephew, but I'm tired of being the referee between my brother and his wife and his wife's mother, who is an evil-tempered old trout around whom I have to sit on my hands lest they reach out, grab her and shake her until her teeth rattle.  If the grown-ups in that situation cannot act like adults, I refuse to make it my problem anymore.  I have plans on Christmas Day, darn it!  (The fact that they, too, involve the Doctor Who special doesn't have to be discussed, nor does the fact that I intend to laze about in my comfy clothes, order in Chinese food for dinner, and get quietly and pleasantly pickled.)


GlitterIsMyDrug

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Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #653 on: November 20, 2013, 05:56:00 PM »
Purple comment - my mother actually did broke the cycle of oyster dressing for her family.  We live in a landlock state so oysters are $$$.  The only people in the family that liked oysters were my great grandparents (who were dead several years at this point) and great uncle (in California) who came to Thanksgiving about once every 4-6 years.  Mom refused to make it.  General hue and cry.  Then she asked her aunts and parents (my great aunties and grandparents) if they actually liked it.  Well, NO but we ALWAYS have it.  yesh.   ::)

Oh...we must be related. There was some dish or other that was "always served", but never eaten. Finally one year my grandma had enough and didn't make it. No one liked it. No one. No one even remembered why we always made it. So it disappered. Her brother said "But it's tradition! We pass it around the table and no one takes any!" so grandma got up and handed him an empty saucer plate and said "Here! Pass this around! It's the same BLEEP thing!", so we did. And we still do that. Anytime great uncle comes for dinner grandma says "Hold on! I gotta get my empty saucer" and we pass around an empty saucer. The first time it happened and Partner was there she said nothing, just passed around the saucer afterwards I asked why she said nothing and said "Babe, I know crazy when I see it. The best thing to do is to just not fight it", now we know why I'm really marrying her. The story makes her crack up though...I think we'll do the empty saucer at our Thanksgiving this year.

GratefulMaria

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Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #654 on: November 20, 2013, 06:01:15 PM »
MIL is the one who monologued her way through her entire visit one Thanksgiving.  This year DH emailed her that we wouldn't be available on the day itself, and we invited her for dinner this past weekend.  Even though we cracked the code on managing conversational traffic flow with her, we don't want to give a holiday over to that obligation.  Better to just decide there's a day we'll spend time with her, choose it, and move on to enjoy the holiday.  Sadly, that means not including her, but her behavior made that decision.

I am so relieved I could weep.

Amara

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Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #655 on: November 20, 2013, 06:28:58 PM »
Quote
evil-tempered old trout

I love this! I may borrow it from time to time.

snowfire

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Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #656 on: November 20, 2013, 07:32:12 PM »
I *LOVE* the Bingo card idea!!!!!I wouldn't be able to do as much now as we've given my MIL the Cut Direct & my GM, Uncle & Aunt have all passed so we are not subjected to the "Family Holiday" at Uncle's or Uncle's brother's house. (But the stories I could tell.....) I dearly loved my GM & I only tolerated Uncle & Aunt for her sake.  Aunt was toxic x 100000.

My MIL is famous for changing invitations.  You invite her for dinner on Friday. No, it must be the following Tuesday, etc.  When we were still speaking she NEVER accepted an invitation without trying to change the terms & dates.

Holidays are much more peaceful at our house.


Outdoor Girl

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Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #657 on: November 20, 2013, 07:36:27 PM »
When my Mom died, I took over the big meal prep.  It's just my Dad, my brother, and my two nephews, now, though so it isn't bad.  Although we sometimes have some 'strays' who don't have somewhere else to go.

It was traditional that we have 'plum' pudding for Christmas dessert.  That first year without Mom, we had one in the freezer so we still had it.  It is rather complicated to make and the next year when I started talking about gathering together the ingredients to make it, everyone else kind of hemmed and hawed and asked me if I was really set on making it.  Turns out, no one else liked it.

So now I make raspberry pie for Christmas dessert and everyone is happy.  And it is a whole lot less work for me!
I have CDO.  It is like OCD but with the letters in alphabetical order, as they should be.
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ladyknight1

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Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #658 on: November 20, 2013, 07:39:02 PM »
Since we end up cooking 90% of all festive meals, I no longer bow to external demands. I cook what I want and plan the meal at a certain time that I know I can have everything ready by.

That is why Thanksgiving dinner is at 4PM every year, because I refuse to get up before 8PM.

Elfmama

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Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #659 on: November 20, 2013, 07:43:41 PM »
To update my situation: phone calls were made last night. DH and I are exhausted but our families of origin understand that we are NOT going to visit for Thanksgiving.

We are still working on fortifying our spines as neither side is recognizing that we are not visiting for Christmas. Mom is already packed and ready for her current guilt trip. MIL is about to join her. No, no, non, jamais, nein, etc. I am not going home this year.
Time to retrain your brain.  "Home", my dear, is where you and your DH live.  Your parents/PILs house is just that, their house. 
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