Your holiday hill to die on.

[jedikaiti]

My hill to die on is nobody will interrupt me during the Doctor Who Christmas special or they will face the wrath of a mad bitey woman!

It's like kissing, only there's a winner!

[The TARDIS]

My hill to die on is nobody will interrupt me during the Doctor Who Christmas special or they will face the wrath of a mad bitey woman!

It's like kissing, only there's a winner!

Hello, I'm...sexy.

LOL

/hijack over

[AngelicGamer]

My hill to die on is nobody will interrupt me during the Doctor Who Christmas special or they will face the wrath of a mad bitey woman!

You too?    We're usually all over with dinner and all when this happens but I might have company this year because of the regen happening.  Usually I go up to my room with the haul opened presents and watch alone.

[Bethalize]

...   A few years ago, before Wife was banned, we were all having dinner together and Wife threatened Aunt R (her MIL). Physically. At the dinner table. Started to climb over the table to get at her.  ...

Funny that Norman Rockwell never showed that scene in one of his Thanksgiving paintings.   

If was any good at art I'd have Norman Rockwell parodies for sale by the end of the week. Fabulous idea!

I bet someone's done it already.

[Bethalize]

My hill to die on this year is that I am not pressing anyone else to make plans. I have plans; I'm going to go to the gym on schedule as normal, and I'm going to keep on cooking food that works with my eating plan. I don't want to have to struggle to get the vast amount of vegetables I need at each meal, or feel hungry because I didn't have enough protein at my last meal. I'm going to host New Year's Eve for my friends, and I'm going to go clay pigeon shooting in between Christmas and New Year as much as I can. I have mentioned Christmas to DH's sister who was dismissive so let the chips fall where they may. No one is inviting us to spend Christmas day with them. No one wants to see us so badly that they want to ensure our plans work with them, so they can take us as they find us.

It's sad because I am acting a little bit out of hurt. I love(d) Christmas, all parts of it, but it's no fun if you are the only one bothering.

[Free Range Hippy Chick]

Funny that Norman Rockwell never showed that scene in one of his Thanksgiving paintings.   

If was any good at art I'd have Norman Rockwell parodies for sale by the end of the week. Fabulous idea!

I bet someone's done it already.

I'm seeing an entire series of Bateman cartoons: The Woman Who Refused To Go Home For Christmas. The Man Who Criticised The Family Recipe. The Guest Who Asked For Pink Goo.

[English1]

I reached it a couple of years ago. I decided I was done with Christmas. I used to do ALL the work - the cleaning, shopping, decorating, cooking, clearing up, the lot. While ex refused to do anything. I love Christmas so I wanted it to be nice, and as we had his kids over wanted it to be nice for them, but it got old. That year two things were the hill; ex saying to me while I was running round like a mad thing 'you really love Christmas, don't you' and my thinking 'I used to but not any more' and then when the meal was finished they all just stood up and started to walk off, leaving me to clear everything and I snapped 'I've cooked it all - you all get to clear up and load the dishwasher'. They did. But I'd had enough and decided Christmas was cancelled after that.

Then we split up and last year I spent a quiet Christmas Day on my own and loved it.

This year I have new man plus his parents over for christmas and while he's a bit 'Christmas? Bah humbug!' and he's warning me his mum will want to come in and interfere in kitchen etc, I'm still looking forward to it because he does his fair share of any work. Could be interesting as we both tend to micromanage each other in the kitchen (we've given up trying to cooktogether, we just take it in turns now) but I think if we both have our own dishes and keep our noses out of each others, we'll be fine. And I've told him to tell his Mum that I'm one of those women who's very protective of her kitchen so keep out! Not true, but it'll leave us in peace. It's only a tiny kitchen anyway, with us both in, there it's full.

[Free Range Hippy Chick]

Apologies for double posting but I had to get on the laptop for this; the tablet doesn't let me format or correct anything, for some reason.

Now look, #glances around nervously and waves everybody to come closer#, #lowers voice#, this is not strictly etiquette approved, but it's all that's got me and a couple of friends through our respective family Christmases. And as long as you don't do it anywhere the other guests can see... Like it's not rude to think 'Cousin Angina is a sour-faced bigoted ill-informed old prune' even though Armageddon would ensue and you would be in the wrong if you said it aloud.

Bingo cards. The solution is bingo cards.

Every year I draw up a 5 x 5 bingo card. I have #counts# 61 possible entries listed and each of the players (me, friend in Ireland, friend in Scotland, 3 friends in the US) fill in our cards with random choices from the lists. Local variations are permitted (mention of Thanksgiving, religious dietary restrictions etc.) These are things people may do, or say. For example:

* trying to change all the arrangements without reference to the person who is hosting the event. (I've ticked that one off already for Christmas this year and we aren't even in the last week of November yet.)

* asking suspiciously 'what's in this?' while pulling some inoffensive foodstuff to pieces, and then refusing it, because it contains some totally out-there ingredient, like fresh herbs.

* arriving just as you put away the last spoon and asking insincerely if they can help with the dishes.

* bringing some foodstuff that they know perfectly well you always make yourself.

* bringing a hostess gift that requires immediate and lengthy attention.

* or equally, arriving to an event that lasts for twelve hours and several complete meals, and not bringing so much as a bottle of water or a tube of Smarties.

*asking 'did you not make any [some foodstuff that you have made religiously every Christmas since 1942 and thrown away untouched every Boxing Day because nobody actually likes it]'.

* asking at 9pm on Christmas Eve if Christmas dinner could be served at some completely different time (or indeed location) to what has been arranged with 20 people for 2 months.

* coming into the kitchen, getting in the way and trying to make a sandwich when the cook has just announced that dinner will be served in 15 minutes (anyone with a genuine health concern gets a pass on this one).

We make up our cards in the week before Christmas; shooting opens 9am Christmas Eve. Hits are announced to the group by email or text, just for the fun of it. Honesty in reporting is assumed; near misses are put up for group consideration and usually granted (wine intake helps with this - we're more generous towards the end of the day). No prizes except the knowledge that gibbering insanity has been avoided.

I commend it to the House.   

[cicero]

Apologies for double posting but I had to get on the laptop for this; the tablet doesn't let me format or correct anything, for some reason.

Now look, #glances around nervously and waves everybody to come closer#, #lowers voice#, this is not strictly etiquette approved, but it's all that's got me and a couple of friends through our respective family Christmases. And as long as you don't do it anywhere the other guests can see... Like it's not rude to think 'Cousin Angina is a sour-faced bigoted ill-informed old prune' even though Armageddon would ensue and you would be in the wrong if you said it aloud.

Bingo cards. The solution is bingo cards.

Every year I draw up a 5 x 5 bingo card. I have #counts# 61 possible entries listed and each of the players (me, friend in Ireland, friend in Scotland, 3 friends in the US) fill in our cards with random choices from the lists. Local variations are permitted (mention of Thanksgiving, religious dietary restrictions etc.) These are things people may do, or say. For example:

* trying to change all the arrangements without reference to the person who is hosting the event. (I've ticked that one off already for Christmas this year and we aren't even in the last week of November yet.)

* asking suspiciously 'what's in this?' while pulling some inoffensive foodstuff to pieces, and then refusing it, because it contains some totally out-there ingredient, like fresh herbs.

* arriving just as you put away the last spoon and asking insincerely if they can help with the dishes.

* bringing some foodstuff that they know perfectly well you always make yourself.

* bringing a hostess gift that requires immediate and lengthy attention.

* or equally, arriving to an event that lasts for twelve hours and several complete meals, and not bringing so much as a bottle of water or a tube of Smarties.

*asking 'did you not make any [some foodstuff that you have made religiously every Christmas since 1942 and thrown away untouched every Boxing Day because nobody actually likes it]'.

* asking at 9pm on Christmas Eve if Christmas dinner could be served at some completely different time (or indeed location) to what has been arranged with 20 people for 2 months.

* coming into the kitchen, getting in the way and trying to make a sandwich when the cook has just announced that dinner will be served in 15 minutes (anyone with a genuine health concern gets a pass on this one).

We make up our cards in the week before Christmas; shooting opens 9am Christmas Eve. Hits are announced to the group by email or text, just for the fun of it. Honesty in reporting is assumed; near misses are put up for group consideration and usually granted (wine intake helps with this - we're more generous towards the end of the day). No prizes except the knowledge that gibbering insanity has been avoided.

I commend it to the House.

LOVE.THIS.

can we get double bingo if they ask one of the following:
*so when are you (going to get married/have children/your son getting married/fill in the blanks)?
*you gained a lot of weight since i last saw you, no?

[Emmy]

Apologies for double posting but I had to get on the laptop for this; the tablet doesn't let me format or correct anything, for some reason.

Now look, #glances around nervously and waves everybody to come closer#, #lowers voice#, this is not strictly etiquette approved, but it's all that's got me and a couple of friends through our respective family Christmases. And as long as you don't do it anywhere the other guests can see... Like it's not rude to think 'Cousin Angina is a sour-faced bigoted ill-informed old prune' even though Armageddon would ensue and you would be in the wrong if you said it aloud.

Bingo cards. The solution is bingo cards.

Every year I draw up a 5 x 5 bingo card. I have #counts# 61 possible entries listed and each of the players (me, friend in Ireland, friend in Scotland, 3 friends in the US) fill in our cards with random choices from the lists. Local variations are permitted (mention of Thanksgiving, religious dietary restrictions etc.) These are things people may do, or say. For example:

* trying to change all the arrangements without reference to the person who is hosting the event. (I've ticked that one off already for Christmas this year and we aren't even in the last week of November yet.)

* asking suspiciously 'what's in this?' while pulling some inoffensive foodstuff to pieces, and then refusing it, because it contains some totally out-there ingredient, like fresh herbs.

* arriving just as you put away the last spoon and asking insincerely if they can help with the dishes.

* bringing some foodstuff that they know perfectly well you always make yourself.

* bringing a hostess gift that requires immediate and lengthy attention.

* or equally, arriving to an event that lasts for twelve hours and several complete meals, and not bringing so much as a bottle of water or a tube of Smarties.

*asking 'did you not make any [some foodstuff that you have made religiously every Christmas since 1942 and thrown away untouched every Boxing Day because nobody actually likes it]'.

* asking at 9pm on Christmas Eve if Christmas dinner could be served at some completely different time (or indeed location) to what has been arranged with 20 people for 2 months.

* coming into the kitchen, getting in the way and trying to make a sandwich when the cook has just announced that dinner will be served in 15 minutes (anyone with a genuine health concern gets a pass on this one).

We make up our cards in the week before Christmas; shooting opens 9am Christmas Eve. Hits are announced to the group by email or text, just for the fun of it. Honesty in reporting is assumed; near misses are put up for group consideration and usually granted (wine intake helps with this - we're more generous towards the end of the day). No prizes except the knowledge that gibbering insanity has been avoided.

I commend it to the House.

You could sell this as a board game.  After the holidays, people from this forum can get together to play.

Relatives are coming here for the holidays.  I have 2 kids, a 2 year old and a 4 month old, a DH who is lost in the kitchen, and no family in the area to help or even somebody who can clean before the guests arrive so I decided that I will not do any cooking.  I will clean before the guests arrive and enjoy their company.  I ordered a full Thanksgiving spread from the supermarket.

[Venus193]

I love this.  What happens when someone calls "Bingo"?

[Miss March]

Oh, oh- add a bingo slot for being 'volun-told' or hit up to drive someone somewhere at the last possible second! Because you know Auntie Mrytle will call and say that she thinks her tires are bad, and can someone come pick her up? Or maybe Grandpa Jim will need someone to run him home at mid-day because he forgot to bring along that medication that he needs to take before lunch.

[ladyknight1]

We need to play this after the holiday. Maybe a drinking game version? 

[z_squared82]

That awful "let's buy presents only for the kids" meme that pops up every now and then on my side of the family.  Yeah, no.  Every time it pops up I have to squash it again. 

DH and I are the only childless couple on that side of the family.  And I don't care how selfish it makes me sound... I am not going to buy people presents if I have no expectation of getting anything in return. 

To me, a big part of the fun of Christmas is the present exchange.  (emphasis on exchange)  I am not a present-producing-machine, and if you tell me that I am good enough to get presents for all of your kiddies, but not good enough for you to get me something... then I will refuse to participate and not get anyone anything.

And I keep having to go over this over and over again and listen as relatives gasp in shock at what a grinch I am and how selfish to "demand gifts" and how "Christmas is really just for the kids"... ugh.

Just ugh.

My feelings are my feelings and sometimes I feel like the holidays are the worst time of the year to have no kids, and there is no time of year when the childless/childfree are less appreciated...

Can I get a bah, humbug? 

(Man... maybe I should have posted this in the "I need a hug" thread...)

(((slow clap)))

I think your reasoning is sound. Honestly, as the only childfree member of my family, I kind of regret not making a similar stand. I easily spend over $300 on my nieces and nephews for Christmas, and if I'm lucky, I get a wallet sized copy of their school photo in return.

I have three kids and can't imagine excluding a family member without kids in this way.  I have a childless and single BIL and we specifically try to "big gift" him as we know he's spending x3 kids and x2 us on the holidays.

One idea perhaps for you; My sister, who married into a family of which her husband in one of 9 siblings, and there are at recent count 36 kids afoot amongst them all, does this;  adults put their names in a hat and exchange.  Kids do the same.  Buy a gift for the name you pick.  Done and done.  (Of course adults are largely responsible for the names their children pull, as most are super young!)  Simple gift exchange, generation-style.

This is what my family did for years. The aunts/uncles, and then the cousins. You generally also got a gift from your godparents. We've stopped that now as most of us cousins are adults, and we've (ahem, they've) started having babies. Now we play a game with a $5 gift card buy in, and a white elephant with a $20 price limit. Participate, don't participate, just make sure to come and eat.

[z_squared82]

...   A few years ago, before Wife was banned, we were all having dinner together and Wife threatened Aunt R (her MIL). Physically. At the dinner table. Started to climb over the table to get at her.  ...

Funny that Norman Rockwell never showed that scene in one of his Thanksgiving paintings.   

If was any good at art I'd have Norman Rockwell parodies for sale by the end of the week. Fabulous idea!

I bet someone's done it already.

You can make it even more humorous with this tidbit. Wife is significantly older than Cousin. Like, 20 years. I think she's only about five years younger than my aunt/her MIL. So it was a 55yo, mentally unstable woman trying to get across the linen-dress dining room table to assault her 60yo MIL...