Author Topic: Your holiday hill to die on.  (Read 245194 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

jedikaiti

  • Swiss Army Nerd
  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2732
  • A pie in the hand is worth two in the mail.
Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1020 on: December 16, 2013, 03:37:01 PM »
I never heard of that green bean casserole until I got to this site.  My jaw hit the floor when someone posted that her husband preferred the canned version to her made from scratch with fresh produce version.  Still don't feel that I've missed anything.

For me, it was something only seen in movies until quite recently. We never had casseroles when I was growing up, and these days I far prefer the fresh green beans my husband roasts in the oven with a bit of olive oil, a pinch of salt, and some garlic.
What part of v_e = \sqrt{\frac{2GM}{r}} don't you understand? It's only rocket science!

"The problem with re-examining your brilliant ideas is that more often than not, you discover they are the intellectual equivalent of saying, 'Hold my beer and watch this!'" - Cindy Couture

Peregrine

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 457
Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1021 on: December 16, 2013, 04:06:41 PM »
That awful "let's buy presents only for the kids" meme that pops up every now and then on my side of the family.  Yeah, no.  Every time it pops up I have to squash it again. 

DH and I are the only childless couple on that side of the family.  And I don't care how selfish it makes me sound... I am not going to buy people presents if I have no expectation of getting anything in return.

We just instituted the only buy for the kids this year for my husband's side of the family.  We live far away so we have always exchanged gift cards, so as to make sure we don't spend as much mailing the gifts as we spent on the gift.  3 of the 5 siblings have kids.  One of the childless siblings never acknowledged receipt of any gifts, never mind thanked or reciprocated in any way, so they got dropped after 12 years of that.  The other childless one does get a gift (movie theater gift cards) from us, despite her saying not too, because she gifts all the kiddos very generously and we don't want her to get the short end of the stick.  Last year got a little ridiculous when the adults ended up trading $50 REI gift cards, and we just decided to end the exchange among the ones with the kiddos.

I do completely understand, however, not wanting to be putting out for your siblings' kids with no reciprocation, or worse yet a complete dismissal of your value as a family, because you don't have kiddos.

Venus193

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 15893
  • Backstage passes are wonderful things!
Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1022 on: December 16, 2013, 09:37:22 PM »

For me, it was something only seen in movies until quite recently. We never had casseroles when I was growing up, and these days I far prefer the fresh green beans my husband roasts in the oven with a bit of olive oil, a pinch of salt, and some garlic.

Now that's a green bean recipe I could enjoy!

Snooks

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2426
Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1023 on: December 17, 2013, 06:28:19 PM »
This year, I've come to the conclusion that we are coming as close as possible to skipping Christmas, due to DP's medical situation. I'm not doing my traditional couple hundred cookies and pounds of candy and loaves of bread. Family is getting (easy to order) Swiss Colony gifts. No Christmas cards. DD is getting a couple of gifts, but they are easy to order, shipped directly to her. We put up a tree (as DP found that to be a big deal, as usual) but other than that, not decorating. I just don't have the energy or money for all that nonsense this year.

Anyone that complains can come and use my kitchen to bake/put up our lights/etc. themselves. I'm still begging DP to eat more than two or three hundred calories a day and managing nausea/pain. I don't have time for festive.

I know you're going through a rough time and I really hope things get better soon but the evil side of me pictures you being forced into a Santa hat as you say the final sentence. Sorry  :-[

Valentines Mommy

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1049
Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1024 on: December 18, 2013, 09:32:04 AM »
Not my hill, but my brother in laws!  BIL graduated college this year and is interviewing for jobs in Houston. He and his very sweet girlfriend asked if they could join us for the holidays, as there is overlap in his interviews and such. Of course we said yes!

DH is so excited! He and BILL don't see each other often but they have a very warm relationship. Given the 15 year age difference, it is a very avuncular relationship.

MIL's reaction: very, very bad! If her boys don't come home to her, she gets very unreasonable. It's a week away and the texts and voicemails are way past woe is me.

BILL told me he is looking forward to a turkey free and drama free Christmas for the first time in his life.

cwm

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2427
Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1025 on: December 18, 2013, 10:15:20 AM »
Not my hill, but my brother in laws!  BIL graduated college this year and is interviewing for jobs in Houston. He and his very sweet girlfriend asked if they could join us for the holidays, as there is overlap in his interviews and such. Of course we said yes!

DH is so excited! He and BILL don't see each other often but they have a very warm relationship. Given the 15 year age difference, it is a very avuncular relationship.

MIL's reaction: very, very bad! If her boys don't come home to her, she gets very unreasonable. It's a week away and the texts and voicemails are way past woe is me.

BILL told me he is looking forward to a turkey free and drama free Christmas for the first time in his life.

YAY for you and DH and BIL! Ignore MIL, she'll either get over it or die angry, and there's no reason to sacrifice personal happiness for a high-stress environment, plus skipping out on possible interviews.

Mandible

  • Jr. Member
  • *
  • Posts: 13
Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1026 on: December 19, 2013, 03:47:39 PM »
Hi everyone, this is my first post, but this subject just called me to share.

My holiday hill to die on:

(BG) I live a state away from most of my family and I am always traveling down to them for holidays and such. I am 2 years out of college (making me 24) and every time I travel home it is more stressful and I start to dread holidays.

1). This year I will not put up with comments about my weight. It was always "You have thunder thighs." "Should you really eat that?" "You look like you have gained some weight". Well, I have recently lost 40 lbs and when I went back for Thanksgiving my great-grandma said in a loud "whisper" "Mandible is getting too skinny (ha, I am 174 pounds and 5'9", I think not) she should really put on some weight. No more weight comments! EVER! If someone says anything, I will beandip, but if they continue I will just get up and walk out.

2). My mom commandeering all of my time and making me feel guilty when I want to stop and see some friends, or spend time with my aging grandparents, who she hates.

There is a lot of history with this, but basically it boils down to not being talked over, made to feel less than or just generally feel unappreciated by people who never take time out to visit me.

Thanks for letting me ramble.

PastryGoddess

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 4700
    • My Image Portfolio and Store
Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1027 on: December 19, 2013, 04:08:59 PM »
Hi everyone, this is my first post, but this subject just called me to share.

My holiday hill to die on:

(BG) I live a state away from most of my family and I am always traveling down to them for holidays and such. I am 2 years out of college (making me 24) and every time I travel home it is more stressful and I start to dread holidays.

1). This year I will not put up with comments about my weight. It was always "You have thunder thighs." "Should you really eat that?" "You look like you have gained some weight". Well, I have recently lost 40 lbs and when I went back for Thanksgiving my great-grandma said in a loud "whisper" "Mandible is getting too skinny (ha, I am 174 pounds and 5'9", I think not) she should really put on some weight. No more weight comments! EVER! If someone says anything, I will beandip, but if they continue I will just get up and walk out.

2). My mom commandeering all of my time and making me feel guilty when I want to stop and see some friends, or spend time with my aging grandparents, who she hates.

There is a lot of history with this, but basically it boils down to not being talked over, made to feel less than or just generally feel unappreciated by people who never take time out to visit me.

Thanks for letting me ramble.

You may want to try what Green Eyed Hawk* did with her Aunt Bitterhag.  She looked at her and asked "What do you mean by that"  after a particularly nasty comment.  Apparently Aunt Bitterhag is afraid of GEH now.

*I may have gotten the poster wrong

zyrs

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1976
  • spiffily male.
Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1028 on: December 20, 2013, 01:41:47 AM »
My family version of Green Bean casserole has sliced or slivered almonds in place of the onions.  I love it because even my horrible cooking skills can't mess it up and I think it tastes better.

We have another hill to die on.  We don't want people sending Christmas presents to us this year.

We are in the process of moving and trying to make sure things are delivered to the right address and picked up in a timely fashion is just going to be too much of a pain with everything else that is going on.  We sent the presents to the family and would rather they just relax and eat a pear rather than worry about which address to deliver to.

Redneck Gravy

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2680
Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1029 on: December 20, 2013, 11:13:29 AM »
Hi everyone, this is my first post, but this subject just called me to share.

My holiday hill to die on:

(BG) I live a state away from most of my family and I am always traveling down to them for holidays and such. I am 2 years out of college (making me 24) and every time I travel home it is more stressful and I start to dread holidays.

1). This year I will not put up with comments about my weight. It was always "You have thunder thighs." "Should you really eat that?" "You look like you have gained some weight". Well, I have recently lost 40 lbs and when I went back for Thanksgiving my great-grandma said in a loud "whisper" "Mandible is getting too skinny (ha, I am 174 pounds and 5'9", I think not) she should really put on some weight. No more weight comments! EVER! If someone says anything, I will beandip, but if they continue I will just get up and walk out.

2). My mom commandeering all of my time and making me feel guilty when I want to stop and see some friends, or spend time with my aging grandparents, who she hates.

There is a lot of history with this, but basically it boils down to not being talked over, made to feel less than or just generally feel unappreciated by people who never take time out to visit me.

Thanks for letting me ramble.

Welcome

Congratulations

Enjoy your shiny spine!  Merry Christmas

Xanadude

  • Jr. Member
  • *
  • Posts: 11
Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1030 on: December 21, 2013, 12:29:46 PM »
Work colleagues who send graphics/audio heavy Christmas e-mails.   They clog my inbox.  Next year I am going to ask our administrators to gently remind everyone to not send these out, especially to the entire organization.

HGolightly

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 153
Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1031 on: December 21, 2013, 10:33:06 PM »
My lovely hill was established when my DH and I were married. We had been living together just before getting engaged and did 5 family dinners in two days. DH also owned a business that was 24/7 so he also had to go into work for 4:30 over those two days. Our first married Christmas we put our feet down, we were willing to spend time and celebrate with our immediate families between Christmas Eve, Day, and Boxng Day. It meant we missed out on dinner with the extended family but we were not over extended. This is so much more important now that we have kids. Sure my extended family has been less than understanding why we have dinner with the inlaws but at the end of the day our moms gave us life and the rest of the relatives give me grief. Honestly they would prefer DH and kids came and I stayed home (my side).

Softly Spoken

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 614
  • "I am a hawk on a cliff..."
Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1032 on: December 22, 2013, 11:29:19 AM »
Hi everyone, this is my first post, but this subject just called me to share.

My holiday hill to die on:

(BG) I live a state away from most of my family and I am always traveling down to them for holidays and such. I am 2 years out of college (making me 24) and every time I travel home it is more stressful and I start to dread holidays.

1). This year I will not put up with comments about my weight. It was always "You have thunder thighs." "Should you really eat that?" "You look like you have gained some weight". Well, I have recently lost 40 lbs and when I went back for Thanksgiving my great-grandma said in a loud "whisper" "Mandible is getting too skinny (ha, I am 174 pounds and 5'9", I think not) she should really put on some weight. No more weight comments! EVER! If someone says anything, I will beandip, but if they continue I will just get up and walk out.

2). My mom commandeering all of my time and making me feel guilty when I want to stop and see some friends, or spend time with my aging grandparents, who she hates.

There is a lot of history with this, but basically it boils down to not being talked over, made to feel less than or just generally feel unappreciated by people who never take time out to visit me.

Thanks for letting me ramble.

Welcome! Glad you are standing up for yourself.  :) Regarding #1, I just read an article about dealing with judgmental people that you may find helpful. The author reminds us that we are the "boss of our own underpants," and that we cannot all be the "jerk whisperer". ;D She has a lot of good articles about dealing with critical/nosy people during the holidays so you may want to poke around her site and follow some links, but this is her latest post and the timing was just perfect.

Good luck!
"... for there is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so."
-William Shakespeare

"We find comfort among those who agree with us - growth among those who don't."  ~Frank A. Clark

Snooks

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2426
Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1033 on: December 22, 2013, 12:45:11 PM »
This isn't so much a hill but it's not worth it's own thread and doesn't fit anywhere else.  My relationship with my ILs is not good, partly this is because it grates that they expect a super close relationship without any effort on their part.  DH is very laid back, I am not, this leads to problems fairly frequently.  Anyway DH gets an email from MIL two days before they're due to arrive in the country (news to us, figured they'd be coming over but no idea when and I didn't care to find out) asking us if we'd like to visit for new year.  That'd be new year which is two weeks away, that we've had plans for since October.   DH agreed to email back that maybe if they'd given us more notice we would have been able to make it.  Seriously though, two weeks notice and expected to travel 8+ hours to get there, no thanks.  I'm hoping this might give them a clue by four that if they want to see us they are actually going to have to plan.

Still they might have the last laugh, we've currently got a large package (3 feet tall) leaning against the wall which arrived from them and is our Christmas gift.  Apparently our Christmas is being bought to you by the letters W, T and F which is what DH uttered when he saw it.

snowfire

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2255
Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1034 on: December 22, 2013, 01:40:13 PM »
Does it look like this???  >:D  ;D