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• March 21, 2018, 02:05:47 PM

### Author Topic: Your holiday hill to die on.  (Read 1019957 times)

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#### Library Dragon

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##### Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1110 on: December 26, 2013, 10:16:18 PM »
Good point greencat. I may end up giving Rudy another go if I ever have grandchildren  .

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#### scarlett

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##### Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1111 on: December 27, 2013, 11:13:54 AM »
My hill is that I refuse to do all the planning, shopping and cooking for both Thanksgiving and Christmas. DH is a lovely man; but he gets carried away entertaining and hosting leaving me as the kitchen drudge and I'm sick of it. In fact, he is the better cook! I will do one or the other but not both.

Funny, we both agreed that we would love to visit relatives next year for Chrismas when they Skyped us to say that are all coming to where we live, renting a house and staying for the holiday. DH and I looked at each other and both said, "we aren't cooking!"

#### FauxFoodist

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##### Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1112 on: December 27, 2013, 01:31:57 PM »
DH is a lovely man; but he gets carried away entertaining and hosting leaving me as the kitchen drudge and I'm sick of it.

My DH is the same way.  Lovely person and quite the extrovert so he loves loves LOVES to socialize.  While I don't, by a long shot, find working in the kitchen a drudgery, I know when something is going to be too labor-intensive and choose not to do it.  I've sat back and watched DH run around, all frazzled, trying to get something ready because he wanted a particular thing for his family and didn't plan in advance the time to get it done without having to break his neck doing it, and I've told him it's up to him to get it cooked/baked/completed as it's way more work than I am willing to expend.

I did have another hill about 1.5 years ago and, boy, would I not budge no matter how much DH (then-DF) huffed and puffed about it!

BIL and SIL were getting married, and BIL is DH's only sibling so I said let's get them something special, rather than just off the registry.  DH agreed so I set about coming up with ideas for their wedding gift.  I looked at their registry, came up with an idea, talked to DH about it then spent a bit of time online trying to find items that matched their fancy china wedding pattern (they were toasting flutes and a cake cutter, in case anyone's wondering).  I even came here to get feedback about having them engraved, shopped a couple of engravers to see who I liked best, blah blah blah.  Essentially, I handled everything to get the wedding gifts and get them engraved.

The moment arrives that the gifts need to be wrapped.  DH has done NOTHING at this point, except answer my questions and go with me to the mall once to check out one engraver (so, no spending time online locating the gifts/ordering the gifts/finding discounts and no running around town to get the gifts to/from the engraver I selected, which he did not go with me to check out -- in all, I made three trips to that engraver, plus a few phone calls).

I told DH that since he did not do anything else and that this is HIS brother, that he needed to do wrapping.  You would've thought I'd ordered DH to go kick a puppy, he was so upset!  It was far more important to DH that the wrapping look "perfect" (meaning I do it) than the fact that if *I* did the wrapping, then that would mean DH expended no effort.  I flat-out refused.  I don't think I made the wrong choice, and I thought DH was being incredibly selfish (he never once volunteered to do anything like take the gifts to/from the engravers for me).  DH's excuse is that he's terrible at wrapping.  I told him it didn't matter how nice of a job he does -- what matters is that he actually have some part in the process and do the only thing left to do, which was wrap the gifts.

DH ended up wrapping the gifts, albeit being very angry the whole time, but I just didn't care.  I knew I had done all the work while he did what he usually did at that time (pursue his interest of all things Catholic) so I wasn't about to let him off the hook this time.

Months later we talked about it, and DH agreed that he was being quite unreasonable about the whole thing.  I still do the bulk of anything regarding shopping for gifts (DH doesn't expend the effort trying to find a deal so he'll spend more money than we'd actually need to if I don't do it myself).  It's okay; I like shopping.  This year, I was fine with doing all the wrapping (except for my gifts) and had him just do the ribbon since, by the time I was done, I had no interest in dealing with ribbon and bows; DH has picked up other household tasks so I know work is actually more even now.

#### Hillia

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##### Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1113 on: December 27, 2013, 05:21:07 PM »
I didn't think BIL could get worse about Christmas gifts, but he has.  I had already decided that this was the last year I get him anything for b'day or Christmas, because he never acknowledges, let alone thanks us, for his gifts.  On his FB yesterday, he posted, 'Well, I didn't get <expensive item> for Christmas...all I got was socks and pens'.  The pens were from us, and contrary to the implied '99 cent package of Bics from the dollar store', they were $80 worth of pens customized with the name and contact info of the business he is trying to get going. The idea was that he and the IL's could pass them out to friends and family during the course of their day. It's just so deliberately insulting; he went out of his way to publicly be a jerk about something I put a lot of time and thought into. #### gmatoy • Member • Posts: 3104 ##### Re: Your holiday hill to die on. « Reply #1114 on: December 27, 2013, 05:51:11 PM » I didn't think BIL could get worse about Christmas gifts, but he has. I had already decided that this was the last year I get him anything for b'day or Christmas, because he never acknowledges, let alone thanks us, for his gifts. On his FB yesterday, he posted, 'Well, I didn't get <expensive item> for Christmas...all I got was socks and pens'. The pens were from us, and contrary to the implied '99 cent package of Bics from the dollar store', they were$80 worth of pens customized with the name and contact info of the business he is trying to get going.  The idea was that he and the IL's could pass them out to friends and family during the course of their day.  It's just so deliberately insulting; he went out of his way to publicly be a jerk about something I put a lot of time and thought into.

Ouch! Just, ouch!

#### Julian

• I lost it between Thriller and Gangnam Style...
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##### Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1115 on: December 27, 2013, 06:43:05 PM »
My hill this year was cooking.

This Xmas it was just me and Housemate.  So no big glazed ham, no baked veges, no extravaganza of high-level cooking at all.

I bought a kilo of shelled green prawns, a heap of premade salads and fresh salad ingredients.  Xmas cooking consisted of 10 minutes cutting and slicing, and 5 minutes of barbecue time.  Bliss!

So if we have guests next year, unless there are special requests, guess what's on the menu again!

Out on the patio we'd sit,
And the humidity we'd breathe,
We'd watch the lightning crack over canefields
Laugh and think, this is Australia.

Ganggajang - Sounds Of Then (This Is Australia)

#### jedikaiti

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• A pie in the hand is worth two in the mail.
##### Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1116 on: December 27, 2013, 10:49:02 PM »
And why have I had to show them how to download library books 5 times in one year?

Aggravating to be sure but my guess is that they're not paying attention when you show them - they just want you to do it. Apparently they only care to download library books 5x/year (or whenever you visit).

I had to help my grandfather with his stereo so many times I put colored tape on the buttons and wrote him color coded instructions. Worked like a charm. :-)
What part of v_e = \sqrt{\frac{2GM}{r}} don't you understand? It's only rocket science!

"The problem with re-examining your brilliant ideas is that more often than not, you discover they are the intellectual equivalent of saying, 'Hold my beer and watch this!'" - Cindy Couture

#### jedikaiti

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• A pie in the hand is worth two in the mail.
##### Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1117 on: December 27, 2013, 10:49:44 PM »
My hill? Rudolph the song and any other related items aren't allowed in my home. If I can avoid outside I will.  I find it a horrible message. If you're different you have to prove your worthiness/value to be accepted.

I know a version of the song that addresses this, and if you'll remind me I will post the details tomorrow.

Is it the Jack Johnson version? That's got this verse at the end:

Well Rudolph he didn't go for that
he said "I see through your silly games"
How could you look me in the face
when only yesterday you called me names?
Well all of the other reindeers man,
well they sure did feel ashamed,
"Rudolph you know we're sorry,
we're truly gonna try to change"

It's my favourite version.

That's it!
What part of v_e = \sqrt{\frac{2GM}{r}} don't you understand? It's only rocket science!

"The problem with re-examining your brilliant ideas is that more often than not, you discover they are the intellectual equivalent of saying, 'Hold my beer and watch this!'" - Cindy Couture

#### JenJay

• I'm a nonconformist who doesn't conform to the prevailing standards of nonconformity.
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##### Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1118 on: December 27, 2013, 10:56:58 PM »
I didn't think BIL could get worse about Christmas gifts, but he has.  I had already decided that this was the last year I get him anything for b'day or Christmas, because he never acknowledges, let alone thanks us, for his gifts.  On his FB yesterday, he posted, 'Well, I didn't get <expensive item> for Christmas...all I got was socks and pens'.  The pens were from us, and contrary to the implied '99 cent package of Bics from the dollar store', they were $80 worth of pens customized with the name and contact info of the business he is trying to get going. The idea was that he and the IL's could pass them out to friends and family during the course of their day. It's just so deliberately insulting; he went out of his way to publicly be a jerk about something I put a lot of time and thought into. Whoa!! I would have had a very difficult time not replying "I'm sorry you didn't like the$80 worth of customized pens I had made for your new business. I promise that you won't receive a disappointing gift from us next year!" Jerk!

#### cwm

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##### Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1119 on: December 30, 2013, 11:33:22 AM »
And why have I had to show them how to download library books 5 times in one year?

Aggravating to be sure but my guess is that they're not paying attention when you show them - they just want you to do it. Apparently they only care to download library books 5x/year (or whenever you visit).

I had to help my grandfather with his stereo so many times I put colored tape on the buttons and wrote him color coded instructions. Worked like a charm. :-)

I had to color code all of sis's cables and cords so she could set up her own entertainment system. She ignored the colors, set it up wrong, had a friend come "help" her who didn't know what he was doing, and the only after a month called me back to come help. I came in, looked at the mess of cords, then asked her where the color sheet was that I'd made for her. She dug it out, and I made her go through and plug everything in the right place by colors. It was amazing how well it worked after that...

#### StarDrifter

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##### Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1120 on: December 30, 2013, 05:39:47 PM »
Does NYE still count as part of the holiday celebrations?

Because I am *refusing* to be the person who all the small children are thrust upon. The last few years (because I'm 'so good with the kids!' ugh) anyone under 13 has been directed to where I am trying to read or work on my computer to be entertained while their parents get rip-roaring drunk outside in the function area of my parents' house.

No.

This year I have BabyDrifter to deal with and she's teething, so she's not sleeping much at all. I will not be responsible for everyone else's kids, too.

(If I had things entirely my way we wouldn't even be going to my parents' NYE party, but a cousin of mine who I love dearly is in town for the first time in 7 years and will be there, it'll be one of our few chances to catch up and he doesn't drink much, so I think we'll end up sitting somewhere quiet, me with BabyDrifter in her carrier attached to me, and chatting while the other adults deal with the over excited children waving glow sticks and sparklers around).
... it might frighten them.
Victoria,

#### Library Dragon

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##### Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1121 on: December 30, 2013, 05:49:10 PM »
I think it counts and you have a good plan.  Babydrifter and cousin will be need all your time and attention.

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#### FauxFoodist

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##### Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1122 on: December 30, 2013, 05:51:37 PM »
Does NYE still count as part of the holiday celebrations?

Because I am *refusing* to be the person who all the small children are thrust upon. The last few years (because I'm 'so good with the kids!' ugh) anyone under 13 has been directed to where I am trying to read or work on my computer to be entertained while their parents get rip-roaring drunk outside in the function area of my parents' house.

No.

This year I have BabyDrifter to deal with and she's teething, so she's not sleeping much at all. I will not be responsible for everyone else's kids, too.

(If I had things entirely my way we wouldn't even be going to my parents' NYE party, but a cousin of mine who I love dearly is in town for the first time in 7 years and will be there, it'll be one of our few chances to catch up and he doesn't drink much, so I think we'll end up sitting somewhere quiet, me with BabyDrifter in her carrier attached to me, and chatting while the other adults deal with the over excited children waving glow sticks and sparklers around).

I'm interested to see how this goes for you (I, fortunately, have never had this happen to me; the last time I was good with kids was when I was 15 years old and worked as a camp counselor -- now that I think about it, I was "stuck" with the very young children every week we had a trip to an amusement park because I was "good with the young kids," which really chapped my hide since I once was assigned 9-10 campers to watch in a big amusement park by myself when we usually didn't have more than 6-7 per group).

#### Free Range Hippy Chick

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##### Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1123 on: December 30, 2013, 06:07:57 PM »
Can we put together some sort of Early Warning System, by which 6 weeks before the celebration in question next year, we get an email saying 'remember what happened last year and start planning the escape now'?

I hereby swear that next Christmas I am not offering to organise/cater/host ANY family event other than Christmas Day, and that will be for my own nuclear family. Anybody who wants anything else from me will have to ask, out loud, in words, not by assumptions and guesswork, and if they do, then we're doing whatever it is the way I want, and we aren't changing the arrangements seventeen times including once after all the shops have shut and there isn't time to rework anything.

Yes, NYE does count: we're having a takeaway and a family evening at home and no visitors at all! I don't care who gives me the puppy dog eyes, I'm done for what's left of this year. If you wanted me to put together yet another family shindig, you should have said. If you wanted to see me on NYE, you should have invited me, not assumed that I would be organising something.

#### kherbert05

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##### Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #1124 on: December 30, 2013, 08:46:20 PM »
If I had control over the weather my hill to die on would be there would be a gully washer of a rain every night from sundown to sunup between now and Jan 7th when the kids go back to school. I hate drunk irresponsible idiots setting off fireworks!
Don't Teach Them For Your Past. Teach Them For Their Future