Author Topic: Six-month-iversary, and similar maybe-'milestones'  (Read 6888 times)

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jmarvellous

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Six-month-iversary, and similar maybe-'milestones'
« on: November 03, 2011, 05:51:43 PM »
So, my boyfriend and I have been dating for 6 months as of yesterday (as in, our first Internet-dating-site-prompted date was May 2 ;D ). I realized that today, and merely said, "Happy 6 months of dating!" in our afternoon chat session, to which he replied, "woo hoo." I know he doesn't know when our first date was (and I had to think about it!), nor do I care one way or another; it was more that it was a nice thought -- I've enjoyed these past months a great deal!


I am remembering when I was in high school and some kids celebrated every "monthiversary," (and some expected their friends to acknowledge it) but I really don't know how the rest of the adult world views these things, as they seem to get much more private as we age.

I am curious, though: Is there a protocol for these sorts of non-occasion occasions (at least coming at it from the view that there's no Hallmark card for the half-year mark)? What do you expect from an SO, if anything?

If there's not a generally accepted take, how do you personally feel? What have you done, or not done?

Angel B.

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Re: Six-month-iversary, and similar maybe-'milestones'
« Reply #1 on: November 03, 2011, 05:55:15 PM »
I've always done monthiversaries for the first year of seeing someone, and then just gone to "oh we've been dating a year and a half, ect"

If it's at a half a  year or a year, then my (ex)SO and I used to do things to celebrate, but if it was just, for example, 8 months, we've mention it in passing and maybe give each other a kiss. :)

I think it entirely depends on the couple TBH.
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leftout

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Re: Six-month-iversary, and similar maybe-'milestones'
« Reply #2 on: November 03, 2011, 06:07:18 PM »
I think it's silly at this point. And I don't mean it's stupid. Like since you remembered and acknowledged it with a sort of, "Hey, I still like you!" 10-second conversation, that's cute. But yeah, no one celebrates that stuff in adulthood. I would have to make up a date if I wanted any sort of anniversary with my boyfriend!

Judah

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Re: Six-month-iversary, and similar maybe-'milestones'
« Reply #3 on: November 03, 2011, 06:08:22 PM »
When I was dating, it might have been mentioned in passing, "Oh, hey, today is one year since we started dating!", but only if I remembered, which wasn't likely.  Anything less than a year isn't even worth a mention to me, and I don't care if he remembers or not. 

For wedding anniversaries, we generally celebrate with a weekend away, or at least a romantic dinner and the exchange of cards.  I'm not overly sentimental, so acknowledgement of the date is enough for me. 
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Daffydilly

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Re: Six-month-iversary, and similar maybe-'milestones'
« Reply #4 on: November 03, 2011, 06:15:34 PM »
My DH and I were talking about having a date night for our one month wedding anniversary. Then I counted the days, realized my cycle was off and took a test that morning. We were so shocked to find we were expecting, we didn't do anything that day. And we're not planning on celebrating a one month anything again, just in case.

ilrag

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Re: Six-month-iversary, and similar maybe-'milestones'
« Reply #5 on: November 03, 2011, 06:17:27 PM »
I like to bring up monthaversaries in a jokey "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DIDN'T GET ME 12 DOZEN ROSES SPRINKLED WITH UNICORN BONES" kind of way but not in any sort of regular interval.

Delia DeLyons

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Re: Six-month-iversary, and similar maybe-'milestones'
« Reply #6 on: November 03, 2011, 06:22:05 PM »
Im 26, BF is 30 - we acknowledge every month-iversary, simply bc, when we started dating, he told me his longest rel@tionship was 2 mos...so now its kind of a running joke (just hit 4 mos... We conveniently started seeing each otheron 1 July... Easy to remember!) and I have a silly internal sense of pride that Ive been his longest rel@tionship... Mine was 5 years, lol.. So we dont mention that part!  Its not silly @ all if it makes you happy girl! And I disagree that "adults dont do that"  Adults do tons of sill things often thought to be reserved for younger folks... Tickle fights? Pumpkin carving? My world would be kinda bland with the spice of these childish detours :-) Best wishes!
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leftout

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Re: Six-month-iversary, and similar maybe-'milestones'
« Reply #7 on: November 03, 2011, 06:36:43 PM »
Im 26, BF is 30 - we acknowledge every month-iversary, simply bc, when we started dating, he told me his longest rel@tionship was 2 mos...so now its kind of a running joke (just hit 4 mos... We conveniently started seeing each otheron 1 July... Easy to remember!) and I have a silly internal sense of pride that Ive been his longest rel@tionship... Mine was 5 years, lol.. So we dont mention that part!  Its not silly @ all if it makes you happy girl! And I disagree that "adults dont do that"  Adults do tons of sill things often thought to be reserved for younger folks... Tickle fights? Pumpkin carving? My world would be kinda bland with the spice of these childish detours :-) Best wishes!

Not sure if you were responding to what I wrote, but this is totally what I meant. It's cool if it's fun and silly and something you get a kick out of. And for you, yeah, it sounds like you guys get a kick out of it, you don't take it seriously with Hallmark cards and a fancy evening out, it's just an acknowledgement for poops and giggles. It's very different from the high school super-serious three week anniversary!

jmarvellous

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Re: Six-month-iversary, and similar maybe-'milestones'
« Reply #8 on: November 03, 2011, 06:57:18 PM »
Just sayin, Leftout's phrase "poops and giggles" is way more hilarious than the phrase it comes from.

WillyNilly

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Re: Six-month-iversary, and similar maybe-'milestones'
« Reply #9 on: November 03, 2011, 07:08:33 PM »
For me, as an adult, I have generally viewed 6 & 12 month anniversary's as god time's to do a relationsip audit and have a state of the union conversation. Nothing super formal, but basicly personal reflection about how I feel about the relationship, a good starting point for conversations about where the relationship is headed, that sort of thing. Its a good time to start casual mariage conversations IMO because its low pressure - most people don't get engaged at 6 months, so you can say "hey I know we're not there, but are we on that path?", and all the conversations that surround long term - are you on the same page about kids, where you'll live, do your neatness, eating and financial habits mesh? Have you met each other's families? Etc.

bah12

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Re: Six-month-iversary, and similar maybe-'milestones'
« Reply #10 on: November 03, 2011, 07:23:11 PM »
I celebrated the monthiversary when I was in high school, but have never done anything like that in my adult relationships...not that they're wrong, but they aren't me.

When DH and I were dating, we did have "the talk" around 6 months....but not on the exact date.  And I think it was a good time.  We celebrated our one year dating anniversary by getting engaged.  But since neithr of us could remember the exact day we officially started dating, we just picked some random Saturday night and called it our anniversary.  Since marriage, the only anniversary we celebrate is our wedding. 

I think that as relationships mature (with time), then celebrating annually is the easiest fallback.  For me, at this stage, it would be exhausting to celbrate every single month...or even every six months.   More than just celebrating, it's too mentally exhausting for me to even think to simply acknowledge the day.  Annually seems easier, more special, and for me, more appropriate.  In high school, that was different.  If I made it to six months with a guy I thought that was forever!  My perspective has changed.

That being said, there are some that are way way more sentimental than me, so acknowledging a date isn't a bad thing.  It's actually impressive that you can remember and remember to say something about it!

Allyson

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Re: Six-month-iversary, and similar maybe-'milestones'
« Reply #11 on: November 03, 2011, 08:55:32 PM »
I think as long as the couple is on the same page, it's fine. Though I think expecting one's partner to acknowledge 'months' outside of high school would be a bit much. If that's what both people want to do, cool, but since it is rather outside the norm I think getting upset because someone forgot a 4 month anniversary wouldn't be too great. And, expecting friends to acknowledge it in any way would be a big no.

Also, the 'dating anniversary' thing has slightly confused me. When would I count mine...from the day we first hung out and realised we were interested? First one-on-one get together? When we acknowledged we were seeing each other? My boyfriend and I do have something we could point to as a first 'date', but lots of couples I know don't even have that--they more drifted together towards a relationship.

Palladium

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Re: Six-month-iversary, and similar maybe-'milestones'
« Reply #12 on: November 03, 2011, 09:04:30 PM »
My DH and I both deliberately didn't remember the date of the first time we went out, specifically to avoid the whole 'monthiversary' thing. Neither of us is into it at all. We know roughly when we first started going out to within about 2 weeks (FTR I was only 19 at the time and he was my first boyfriend), but not the exact date. Before we were married we used to celebrate on Valentine's day. Now we have our wedding anniversary, so we'll do something nice for that every year as well, that's enough for us.

Miss Sheep

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Re: Six-month-iversary, and similar maybe-'milestones'
« Reply #13 on: November 04, 2011, 05:49:35 AM »
We celebrate the years with a chocolate cake and then, when I remember the days (I have a program that count the days betwen to dates). The days are more numbers that we like (500, 777...), and our celebration consist in treat ourselves to eat something that we enjoy, like cheese fondue. We never celebrated the first month, but we celebrated the first 200 days.

Bethalize

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Re: Six-month-iversary, and similar maybe-'milestones'
« Reply #14 on: November 04, 2011, 06:05:31 AM »
I view wedding anniversaries as a private thing. My husband and I remember it, but I don't expect anyone else to. My bridesmaid does. My mother used to.

We also celebrate our "secret" anniversary. It's the date we got together. We weren't married until nearly ten years of being together so the secret anniversary is the big one.