Funny things you've said/done while under anesthesia

[SamiHami]

I wander. When I had my wisdom teeth out at age 21 I was put under and all was fine. Once I woke up, still very, very out of it, I had this overwhelming need to see my mother. I kept asking for her and they kept telling me they would let her back in a few minutes. So, apparently nobody was actually keeping an eye on me, because I decided to get up, walk to the waiting room and get mom myself. That was the plan, anyway.

What I actually did was get up, take one or two shaky steps and collapsed to the floor, completing upsetting and freaking out the staff. The did go get mom.

Fast forward a couple of years and I had to have a minor procedure that required me going under anesthesia. DH and I explain to the staff that I "wandered" previously, but they said no worries-that is not going to happen. Fine.

I come out of anesthesia and I really, really wanted to see my DH. I kept asking for him and again I'm told he'll be allowed back in a few minutes. Not good enough for me. I want to see him NOW!

Once again I get up, take a couple steps and bam! I'm on the floor again. They should have taken me seriously.

The few times I have had to be anesthetized since then my husband and I are adamant about it and insist that they must keep an eye on me at all times. As a result, we usually are able to convince them to have DH waiting in the recovery room for me so I see him first thing when I wake up. That works for us.

[Kimblee]

I proposed marriage to my dentist. Who has a male life partner. Who is his dental assistant and apparently found the whole matter hilarious. I would not take no for an answer and for some reason wanted the dentist to be my wife.  (I kept seranading him with "Dr. Brendan, you're a fine girl, what a gooood wife you'd beeee" But couldn't remember the next line. )

I barelky remember it, but they told me about it later. All i remember for myself is tyhe doctor saying "no" and the dental assistant telling him "Oh come on, you can't do any better!"

I should mention I was maybe fifteen or so at the time.

[suzieQ]

The post is too long to put here but a link to it will provide you with some merriment.
http://type1anautoimmunething.blogspot.com/2011/03/shot-of-versed-with-chaser-of-crazy.html

This is the story of when my son had an endoscopy.

[kokopellimom]

While in the recovery room, I hit on the doctor who took out my wisdom teeth. My mother was in the room. I was 16.

I was mortified later. And guess who couldn't stop laughing when she told me about my lewd behavior? 

--

On a more dramatic note, I had eye surgery this past summer, one eye at a time, a month apart. During the first one, I was under sedation, rather than general anesthesia. Apparently, I had a panic attack during the procedure (I don't remember it). My eye surgeon told me afterward that they would be doing the other eye under general anesthesia.

I asked him, "Was I that bad?"

Ever the master of calm understatement, his reply was, "It's a very, very good thing that we had you strapped down so well. You were absolutely feral."

I asked him again at my follow-up appt, "Are you sure I have to have general anesthesia for this eye?"

His reply? "No, you don't. But you will have to find another surgeon."

I must have really been something to see. 

[ettiquit]

(I kept seranading him with "Dr. Brendan, you're a fine girl, what a gooood wife you'd beeee" But couldn't remember the next line. )

ROFL

[2littlemonkeys]

After my first c-section, I remember telling DH that I didn't feel a thing and I really didn't know why everyone talked about how awful the pain from c/s was.  My spinal had worn off and I wasn't woozy or anything, I guess I kinda forgot about the fact that I was loaded to the gills with morphine.

Ha.  Ha ha ha.  I discovered reality about 8 or 9 hours later.   

[hobish]

Anesthesia apparently short-circuits my DH's memory.  After his wisdom tooth removal, DH kept insisting that he was totally fine and had fully recovered from the anesthesia (after 10 minutes - yeah right!).  While driving home, he kept looking out the window and asking me what we were doing.  I would say "driving on the freeway" or "driving home" and he would say "this doesn't look hard, I could do this". (at this point, he was like 28, and had been driving for 10-12 years)   
When we got to the exit for our city, DH said with some alarm, "Where are we?".  I told him we'd just exited onto Street.  "Oh!" he said, "How did we get here already?  We just left!".     Yep, previous 30 minutes of driving (and all related questions/comments) were totally forgotten.  When we got home, he fell asleep on the couch and woke up having forgotten that he had the surgery!  Totally didn't believe me until I asked if his jaw hurt and he admitted it did.

OMGoodness, i did the same thing!  Riding home with my mom i kept asking "Where are we?" all incredulous like, and i kept tying to get out of the car. I'd pass out for a sec, wake up, and repeat. Gish was waiting for us at our apartment and i apparently threw myself into his arms as soon as i saw him. I passed ot again when i got home and Gish went to sleep in the doorway to make sure i didn't get up and go wandering off somewhere. Instead i woke up and started yelling at him that we had missed my appointment, then stopped mid-sentence when i realized my mouth was full of blood and pain 

The time after that i wet myself.

[Sirius]

The day Mr. Sirius had shoulder surgery we were watching Jeopardy in his hospital room, and he was answering all the questions as soon as they were read off.  The next day when he came home he said he didn't remember a thing.  I told him about the Jeopardy questions, and the answer to one of them was "Saturn V2 rocket".  He still didn't remember. 

[alkira6]

Um, okay, let's work backwards from a couple of weeks ago.

Held conversations with the staff in French. Groped the Dr. in front of my DH while both of them laughed hysterically.

Sang the Cell Block Tango from Chicago, complete with commentary and random writhing that was supposed to be dancing.

Demanded freedom for all of the oppressed pygmy marmosets that were being kept as sweatshop labor. Demanded a boycott of Ticketmaster due to the company's policy of racism against koalas.

Sang dirty dirty lymerics to all and sundry.

Demanded cake and icecream.

[Valentines Mommy]

I hallucinated a drug bust while on Percoset after I had my wisdom teeth removed.

[siamesecat2965]

Not after, but while being put under for one of my umpteen endoscopies. I was a pro by this time, and the anesthesiologist first wanted to know where the Bon Jovi CD was which cracked me up, then, just after he started injecting the happy juice, I hear him say "Her eyes are still wide open"  I wanted to say "well give me MORE then!"

[Dazi]

I kicked my oral surgeon in the Private bits.  He had to join me in the recovery room for awhile.

I don't remember doing it and I AM STILL HORRIBLY EMBARRESSED BY IT.  Apparently, I come out fighting...fighting dirty.

[GreenEyedHawk]

DAZI! LOL.  That's hilarious, with apologies to your surgeon lol.

[Dazi]

DAZI! LOL.  That's hilarious, with apologies to your surgeon lol.

I do still feel bad about it, but it is kind of funny now.  I woke up about 1/2 through the procedure and they had to re juice me and restrain me.

[Piratelvr1121]

Not me, but when DH had his wisdom teeth out a few years ago he got very, very sentimental, thanking me so much for being there for him and supporting him.   When it wore off he didn't remember saying that.

I also had my bff call me after her gallbladder surgery saying "Oh I feel GREAT!! This anafweesia stuff is gooood!! I don't know why I was so nervous about it..." (She'd never had surgery before, or rather nothing that required general anesthesia) and then later she said to me "Oh I didn't talk to you at all after I had my surgery."  I giggled and said "Yes you did, honey, you called me and practically waxed poetic about the joys of anafweeshia." She laughed and told me that she apparently called her sister too.

I'll have to ask DH if I said anything funny once the epidural kicked in but I've been telling everyone I felt like Lucy doing the Vitameatavegamin commercial, it felt so good.