Poll

Do you like the restaurant staff singing to a diner for a special occasion?

It's fun for all!
25 (8.7%)
OK for others, but not for me.
75 (26.2%)
A free dessert is nice, but please don't make a big deal out of it.
106 (37.1%)
No! Delay everyone else's dinner and intrude on my time with my group? Just, no.
59 (20.6%)
Other
21 (7.3%)

Total Members Voted: 255

Voting closed: July 22, 2014, 12:47:12 PM

Author Topic: Restaurants and personal celebrations  (Read 3613 times)

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TootsNYC

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Re: Restaurants and personal celebrations
« Reply #75 on: July 09, 2014, 11:22:01 AM »
I chose "Ok for others, but not for me".  I don't care if others choose to celebrate this way.  To each his own as the saying goes.

However, I told DH that if he ever did this to me I would get up and walk out on the whole shebang.  Last month we went to a fine dining place for my birthday.  DH told the waiter and they wrote "Happy Birthday" in chocolate syrup on my dessert plate.  That was okay.  Singing waiters and goofy hats...no thanks.

The thing is, -someone- in the dining party has to tell the waiters about the birthday. Honestly, nobody should be doing that if the person doesn't want the attention.

Though I agree w/ CakeEater, that if you directly ask someone, are they going to think it's OK to say, "Oh, yes, make a fuss of me!" And it also ruins the surprise.

So I think that unless you really know the person well, you just shouldn't arrange it.

And I'm not realizing that I haven't seen it in a long time. Don't know why that it--maybe we're eating at such middle-market places that people don't do there for special occasions, or maybe dining out in NYC is such an everyday thing that the percentage of birthday celebrants is greatly watered down...

Yvaine

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Re: Restaurants and personal celebrations
« Reply #76 on: July 09, 2014, 11:36:44 AM »
I chose "Ok for others, but not for me".  I don't care if others choose to celebrate this way.  To each his own as the saying goes.

However, I told DH that if he ever did this to me I would get up and walk out on the whole shebang.  Last month we went to a fine dining place for my birthday.  DH told the waiter and they wrote "Happy Birthday" in chocolate syrup on my dessert plate.  That was okay.  Singing waiters and goofy hats...no thanks.

The thing is, -someone- in the dining party has to tell the waiters about the birthday. Honestly, nobody should be doing that if the person doesn't want the attention.

Though I agree w/ CakeEater, that if you directly ask someone, are they going to think it's OK to say, "Oh, yes, make a fuss of me!" And it also ruins the surprise.

So I think that unless you really know the person well, you just shouldn't arrange it.

And I'm not realizing that I haven't seen it in a long time. Don't know why that it--maybe we're eating at such middle-market places that people don't do there for special occasions, or maybe dining out in NYC is such an everyday thing that the percentage of birthday celebrants is greatly watered down...

I've had waiters notice when carding me for alcohol, though they didn't automatically launch into a song. :D

Lynn2000

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Re: Restaurants and personal celebrations
« Reply #77 on: July 09, 2014, 02:04:37 PM »
I would totally say, "Yes, sing to me!"  ;D Except I wouldn't, because I really don't want it to happen to me, but if I liked that sort of thing and they asked first, I would feel perfectly comfortable saying yes. You can say yes in kind of a silly, ironic way, or you can say, "That's exactly why we came here for my birthday!" or something like that. I think there wouldn't be many times when you literally had to say, "Yes, I want everyone to adore me for two minutes, and give me free food as well." Just my opinion, of course. :)
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JoieGirl7

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Re: Restaurants and personal celebrations
« Reply #78 on: July 09, 2014, 06:40:48 PM »
My problem with this is that it is rarely kept to just singing.  A sushi place I eat at a lot will do this and include the banging of this little gong that is carried over to the table--bong bong bong as it goes.  Also, lots of rhythmic clapping.

So, in the middle of an otherwise peaceful upscale place, all heck breaks loose so that someone can be presented with a small scoop of vanilla with reddi whip and sprinkles for their birthday.

Sometimes it will happen more than once.

There are a couple other places that do something similar and again, it does not involve only singing but clapping and sometimes shouting.

I find it very intrusive to my dining experience.


jedikaiti

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Re: Restaurants and personal celebrations
« Reply #79 on: July 09, 2014, 08:24:03 PM »
I couldn't decide where to throw my vote.

I've rarely if ever experienced singing so loud it drowns out other conversations, but it is almost always distracting. It usually doesn't bother me all that much, though.

I'm not usually to into being sung to like that, except at my favorite sushi bar. They do a whole dim the lights, sing Happy Birthday, and a free (yummy) dessert, and I like that (and they don't make the staff gather around... the server starts singing and the others join in - as they continue attending their tables). The whole clapping and everyone in your face singing is not really my thing.
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Luci

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Re: Restaurants and personal celebrations
« Reply #80 on: July 10, 2014, 10:13:07 AM »

I'm not usually to into being sung to like that, except at my favorite sushi bar. They do a whole dim the lights, sing Happy Birthday, and a free (yummy) dessert, and I like that (and they don't make the staff gather around... the server starts singing and the others join in - as they continue attending their tables). The whole clapping and everyone in your face singing is not really my thing.

They dim the lights?!?

That is dangerous. If I were coming back from the restroom, for example, my eyes couldn't adjust to suddenly even slightly dimmer lights and I'd trip, being the coordinated person I am! What if my companions and I are studying, for example, a flyer about local attractions? We would be really ticked to be disturbed like that. I also wouldn't be happy with a server singing while attending me while we are having a nice discussion.

Asharah

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Re: Restaurants and personal celebrations
« Reply #81 on: July 16, 2014, 01:21:22 PM »
I voted OK for Others, and Other.  Here is my "Other."

Several years ago I went out to a late lunch/early dinner with my DH, adult children, and grandchildren at a local Italian restaurant for my birthday.  My daughter brought me some presents in a gift bag, and I looked at them before our food was served, but we did not tell anyone at the restaurant that it was my birthday.  When the meal was over our server came out unexpectedly with a huge, kind, smile and a tray of large pieces of cake on plates.  Of course, we all thanked her profusely, smiled back, and ate the cake.  The gesture of the young server was meant to be kind, and I never would have wanted to hurt her feelings.

I was secretly rather unhappy, though.  Waiting for us at home was a home made cassata cake that I had carefully made for my family, and several of our favorite ice creams.  When we got back to our house everyone was too full of the restaurant's cake to sit at the table as planned and have dessert and coffee together.  The adults did have some small pieces of cassata before they left to be polite, but it was not the event that I had anticipated.

To make matters more disappointing to me, the restaurant cake was stale, had a chemical aftertaste, and had cool whip style icing.  I'm not sure if it's allergies or my body's rebellion, but I get really uncomfortable and hyper when I eat commercial baked goods with a lot of those chemicals and preservatives in them.
I know you didn't want to hurt the servers feelings, but I don't think there would be anything wrong with politely explaining you already had plans to go elsewhere for a special dessert and decline to accept the cake the server brought.
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Lynn2000

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Re: Restaurants and personal celebrations
« Reply #82 on: July 16, 2014, 04:52:48 PM »
I voted OK for Others, and Other.  Here is my "Other."

Several years ago I went out to a late lunch/early dinner with my DH, adult children, and grandchildren at a local Italian restaurant for my birthday.  My daughter brought me some presents in a gift bag, and I looked at them before our food was served, but we did not tell anyone at the restaurant that it was my birthday.  When the meal was over our server came out unexpectedly with a huge, kind, smile and a tray of large pieces of cake on plates.  Of course, we all thanked her profusely, smiled back, and ate the cake.  The gesture of the young server was meant to be kind, and I never would have wanted to hurt her feelings.

I was secretly rather unhappy, though.  Waiting for us at home was a home made cassata cake that I had carefully made for my family, and several of our favorite ice creams.  When we got back to our house everyone was too full of the restaurant's cake to sit at the table as planned and have dessert and coffee together.  The adults did have some small pieces of cassata before they left to be polite, but it was not the event that I had anticipated.

To make matters more disappointing to me, the restaurant cake was stale, had a chemical aftertaste, and had cool whip style icing.  I'm not sure if it's allergies or my body's rebellion, but I get really uncomfortable and hyper when I eat commercial baked goods with a lot of those chemicals and preservatives in them.
I know you didn't want to hurt the servers feelings, but I don't think there would be anything wrong with politely explaining you already had plans to go elsewhere for a special dessert and decline to accept the cake the server brought.

I remember that story from a long time ago! How awkward. Another thing is, I think after she'd gone, you could have reminded the table there was dessert waiting at home. So people could choose to eat this cake if they wanted, or maybe most people would take one bite, push it around a little on the plate, and then just leave it there. Or ask to take their piece to go, because they were "so full" from dinner. But, it's hard to think of those things at the time, especially if you're trying to coordinate a table full of people.
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guihong

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Re: Restaurants and personal celebrations
« Reply #83 on: July 16, 2014, 05:41:33 PM »
I've always told my DH that he's one shenanigan away from having a gorilla show up when and where he least expects it.  My 50th passed without any incident  ;D.