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  • September 20, 2017, 08:52:59 PM

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Author Topic: Spinsters' Club Support Thread  (Read 202723 times)

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diesel_darlin

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #840 on: January 07, 2015, 11:34:13 AM »
Good luck ladies! Im just gonna be over here perfecting my "you kids get off my lawn" voice.  ;D

Outdoor Girl

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #841 on: January 07, 2015, 12:57:47 PM »
And the meeting just got bumped to tonight.  I knew he was free and my plans fell through so I texted him to see if he wanted to bump it up.  Which means I only have the rest of today to freak out instead of several days.  And I won't have time to spend hours on hair and makeup - I'll only have about an hour to get home, change, and put on a little makeup.  Which is good.  I'm a low maintenance kind of girl; better to start off as you mean to go on, right?
After cleaning out my Dad's house, I have this advice:  If you haven't used it in a year, throw it out!!!!.
Ontario

Outdoor Girl

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #842 on: January 07, 2015, 08:43:05 PM »
Ended up only have 10 minutes to change my shirt and throw on a bit of make-up.  Glad I didn't have time to obsess.

We're meeting again on Sunday.

He might not be Mr. Right but he's definitely going to be Mr. Right Now.  I'm not sure we have enough in common to make a long term go of it but I'm keeping an open mind.

And I know he finds me attractive, which is awesome.

I hope my new glasses are in by Friday...
After cleaning out my Dad's house, I have this advice:  If you haven't used it in a year, throw it out!!!!.
Ontario

daen

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #843 on: January 07, 2015, 09:15:05 PM »
Ended up only have 10 minutes to change my shirt and throw on a bit of make-up.  Glad I didn't have time to obsess.

We're meeting again on Sunday.

He might not be Mr. Right but he's definitely going to be Mr. Right Now.  I'm not sure we have enough in common to make a long term go of it but I'm keeping an open mind.

And I know he finds me attractive, which is awesome.

I hope my new glasses are in by Friday...

Glad the first date went well.

For what it's worth, I wasn't too sure about the first guy I met through online dating after the first date, but it turned out pretty well. (We've been married 5+ years.)

Outdoor Girl

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #844 on: January 11, 2015, 02:07:32 PM »
Well, my new glasses came in but all for nought.  He cancelled.

Back to the drawing board...
After cleaning out my Dad's house, I have this advice:  If you haven't used it in a year, throw it out!!!!.
Ontario

Reader

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #845 on: January 12, 2015, 02:59:34 PM »
I've established that my work schedule is more or less incompatible with developing a relationship at this point in my life - it would have been great when I was in college and most potential partners were working retail or food service, but it's terrible now that most of my potential partners are young professionals with 9-5 jobs.

I feel your pain.  Even though I work 55 hrs M-F with weekends off, I find most suitable dating partners put off by my schedule.  Not that I'm in any hurry.  Been single since I dumped my controling, alcoholic, possibly crazy ex back in July.  Rather be out here on the ledge with you lovely people than be constantly accused of cheating (how like I said I work 55 hrs a week and we lived together), and have my privacy violated (he checked my phone while I was sleeping, and becasue I let him use my home computer (saved passwords were not my friend here) he also read my facebook messages.)

Winterlight

  • On the internet, no one can tell you're a dog- arf.
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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #846 on: January 12, 2015, 06:18:33 PM »
I'm moving back home to live with my dad, which I'm guessing is going to kill my dating life. He's not doing well since mom died, so I got a new job locally and will be going back soon. I get the feeling, though, that moving in with Dad in your 40s is not exactly going to look cool. Oh, well.
If wisdom’s ways you wisely seek,
Five things observe with care,
To whom you speak,
Of whom you speak,
And how, and when, and where.
Caroline Lake Ingalls

greencat

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #847 on: January 12, 2015, 07:58:37 PM »
I'm moving back home to live with my dad, which I'm guessing is going to kill my dating life. He's not doing well since mom died, so I got a new job locally and will be going back soon. I get the feeling, though, that moving in with Dad in your 40s is not exactly going to look cool. Oh, well.

There's a big difference between moving in with your aging parent to take care of them and moving back home because you can't afford to live on your own.  I went on a few dates with a guy who was taking care of his grandparents when I was in my early twenties, and even then the difference was pretty clear to me.

Outdoor Girl

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #848 on: January 12, 2015, 08:23:50 PM »
I agree.  I would date a guy living with elderly parents so they could stay in the family home.  I wouldn't date the guy living in his parents' basement, playing video games all day.

And guess who sent me an email today?  Make up your dang mind, man.
After cleaning out my Dad's house, I have this advice:  If you haven't used it in a year, throw it out!!!!.
Ontario

Outdoor Girl

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #849 on: January 14, 2015, 05:44:53 AM »
I now definitively know it's him, not me.  The first time he cancelled out, I thought maybe I'd come on too strong.  Then he emailed me, trying again.  And cancelled again.  Definitely him.  Men Suck!

On Sunday, after I went from sad to mad, I texted a girl I play ball with.  We're going out on the town on Friday.  It'll be fun to just let loose a little.  If we have fun, maybe we can make it a regular thing.  Not looking to pick up, since guys don't pick up girls like me in bars, even when I was that age, but just get out of the house and have some fun.
After cleaning out my Dad's house, I have this advice:  If you haven't used it in a year, throw it out!!!!.
Ontario

Outdoor Girl

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #850 on: January 26, 2015, 10:06:04 AM »
I think I must have a loser magnet attached to me somehow.  Talked to another guy last night - fortunately didn't meet him.  Whole lotta baggage with that one.  I sent him a message on the site, telling him it was because of the distance between us, which is at least partially true, but it's really because, after talking to him, I have no interest in this guy.

And I discovered that I love my new smart phone.  It has a block feature.   ;D  Which I kind of have to thank the last guy for, since it was because of him that I started the process of getting my own phone, rather than depending on my work cell.

Still haven't made it out with the girl I play ball with since her grandmother had a stroke and then passed away.  Poor girl.  But in the midst of it, she changed her relationship status on Facebook to 'In a relationship' so now, she might not have the time to go out with me.  I'll have to see.

I just found out that one of my best friend's cousin is an avid skier and lives not too far from me.  Great guy and we could have a lot of fun skiing together.  He's gay, though, unfortunately.
After cleaning out my Dad's house, I have this advice:  If you haven't used it in a year, throw it out!!!!.
Ontario

Lynn2000

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #851 on: February 09, 2015, 04:04:17 PM »
Historical note: I was doing some family history work this weekend and came across some original marriage documents from England. Man, they sure had a lot of marriage paperwork in the 1800s! I usually found at least three documents attesting to each marriage. Anyway, the groom was usually listed as a "bachelor" and the bride as a "spinster." The first time I saw that I was like, "Huh? She was only 21!" Then I realized that was just the term they used for any woman who hadn't been married before. So at some point it must not have had the connotation of "too old to be unmarried."

Holiday story: My grandma had a tradition of giving each of her grandchildren a book for Christmas, with cash hidden in the pages.  ;D After she passed away my uncle took over this tradition. However, as the grandkids (his kids, nieces, and nephews) grew up it seems like he wanted to start phasing it out, so he started making arbitrary rules about who was no longer eligible. Out of college. Out of high school. Finally it came down to just me, the youngest. I have been out of high school and college for a long, long time, even considering that I got advanced degrees. I still keep getting the book and cash (these days, it is not a book I'm interested in, and not much cash, <$5). Why is that, I wonder? Let me look around at my cousins and think about what is different between us. Oh yes, I see, I'm the only one not married. ::)

This year my uncle gave me a book, with a little cash (like $2), and also vouchers from where he had donated to a local charity. Other kids, like my cousins' kids, had gotten cash; other adults, like my parents, had gotten the vouchers. I went over to thank him for the gift, and he said, "The cash is the kid gift, and the vouchers are the grown-up gift. You're kind of in between, so you get both." I'm 35. I've lived on my own for over ten years. And I have a PhD. Obviously none of that counts for as much as a wedding ring, though... But hey, maybe next year, right? Since I'm in between instead of firmly a kid. ::)

A nice story: I have four cousins (other side) who are brothers. One just got married and two have long-time girlfriends. The fourth just moved to a new area and is lonely. His dad connected him with his girlfriend's kid's art teacher's niece, or something like that, and now the two of them are apparently having substantial phone conversations! I thought that was nice, although the two people are still 1000 miles apart. It's just kind of hilarious to imagine my uncle as a matchmaker--he's kind of a gruff, cynical, opinionated sort of man.
~Lynn2000

Outdoor Girl

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #852 on: February 20, 2015, 11:10:26 AM »
Another date tomorrow, with someone somewhat promising.  I've had some interest from guys just looking to hook-up but since that's not all I want out of this, I've been passing on that, tempting though it may be.

I've definitely had some interesting conversations, though, with various people.  Some of whom I have no interest in meeting but the conversations are interesting.  It's all practice, right?  I can use all the help I can get.  I'm great in writing; not so good face to face.  Shyness is my downfall, for sure.  I think the information age might actually be helping me, now, because I can get my point across in writing.  Which just wasn't done when I was 'normal' dating age back in high school and university.
After cleaning out my Dad's house, I have this advice:  If you haven't used it in a year, throw it out!!!!.
Ontario

siamesecat2965

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #853 on: February 20, 2015, 12:21:39 PM »
Another date tomorrow, with someone somewhat promising.  I've had some interest from guys just looking to hook-up but since that's not all I want out of this, I've been passing on that, tempting though it may be.

I've definitely had some interesting conversations, though, with various people.  Some of whom I have no interest in meeting but the conversations are interesting.  It's all practice, right?  I can use all the help I can get.  I'm great in writing; not so good face to face.  Shyness is my downfall, for sure.  I think the information age might actually be helping me, now, because I can get my point across in writing.  Which just wasn't done when I was 'normal' dating age back in high school and university.

Yay for you! Hope it goes well!  I feel the same way about writing vs. face to face. i am also very shy (although those who know me as an adult only find that very surprising!) i always felt really awkward making small talk, and would freeze up.  I do so much better, even with my female friends, and former classmates I've reconnected with via social media. i'm working on getting out of my second job, and once i do, I think i may try the online dating thing. My friend offered to help me with my profile. i just have to get up the actual confidence to meet someone. i constantly feel like they're looking at me and thinking wow, she's not very (pretty, funny, etc.) which I know is silly, but still can't help it.

Outdoor Girl

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #854 on: February 20, 2015, 12:39:04 PM »
And I continue to think that you are my only slightly older sister that my mother never told me about.  None of my friends, coworkers or teammates think I'm shy.  But I used to be painfully shy.  It's only in the last few years that it has improved.  In large part to some of my teammates on my one ball team.

What has helped me is to have sort of a set list of things to ask in my head and try to work them into the conversation organically.  It's still difficult but at least I'm getting out there.

Be prepared for the weirdos, though.  Although one I had this week was extremely entertaining.  I think he tried his schtick on the wrong woman, though, because the night after he was messaging me, he came back on line with a different user name and profile.  So I think someone who was less amused than me reported him.

The smart phone has come in so handy because it is so easy to block unwanted numbers!
After cleaning out my Dad's house, I have this advice:  If you haven't used it in a year, throw it out!!!!.
Ontario