Spinsters' Club Support Thread

[Venus193]

I sometimes feel like an oddball for being a spinster, but since men don't like me "that way" I stopped fighting it.  My dignity doesn't like being injured.

Since then I have become accustomed to being permanently single and it would be too much work to be in a relationship.

[Petticoats]

I worry that, at my age, after 22 years of no romantic attachment, even if I miraculously find someone I may be too set in my ways to get married. At the same time, sometimes I feel like I'm starving. I hate that I've basically--except for a short time half my life ago--been excluded from this huge, important part of the human experience. I don't feel like I'm living a full life without love in it.

[Venus193]

I had a major lightbulb moment about ten years ago:  You have no control over whether anyone loves you.  You can't choose your parents and you can't make anyone love you no matter what you do.

That realization has saved me from displaying much undignified behavior.

[Winterlight]

Tonight I'm serving spiked apple cider- rum or calvados?

Ooh, normally I'd say rum but I've never tried calvados.

It's an apple brandy, so you get twice the apple yumminess and a big old hit of booze. *g*

[mbbored]

Tonight I'm serving spiked apple cider- rum or calvados?

Ooh, normally I'd say rum but I've never tried calvados.

It's an apple brandy, so you get twice the apple yumminess and a big old hit of booze. *g*

Well, I know what I'm buying the next time I'm at the grocery store.

[Reader]

Cookies and any booze is good.

But I did get a nice compliment the other day at the grocery store.  Went after work, hair in a bun, what was left of my makeup after 11 hours, in my work uniform from my cleaning job.  Nice man in front of me started up small talk and then asked for my number.  Made me feel 10 feet tall walking out the door. 

[Petticoats]

Cookies and any booze is good.

But I did get a nice compliment the other day at the grocery store.  Went after work, hair in a bun, what was left of my makeup after 11 hours, in my work uniform from my cleaning job.  Nice man in front of me started up small talk and then asked for my number.  Made me feel 10 feet tall walking out the door.

That's really nice. Certainly nicer than my most recent unsolicited compliment--from a possibly inebriated panhandler. His remarks weren't actually offensive, though, and I'm starved enough for male validation that I giggled foolishly instead of stalking by while pretending not to have heard. Eesh.

[Outdoor Girl]

I was at our year end baseball banquet Friday night.  I ended up having a great time and stayed way later than I'd intended.  I ended up on the dance floor with people I didn't know when the song I requested came on.  And one of the guys I was dancing with ended up at the same time as me and he bought me a drink!  He made a sexual innuendo without being really crude.  He was too drunk for me to even consider pursuing anything more but it did stroke my ego that someone found me attractive, even if he was wearing beer goggles at the time.

[DollyPond]

Tonight I'm serving spiked apple cider- rum or calvados?

Ooh, normally I'd say rum but I've never tried calvados.

It's an apple brandy, so you get twice the apple yumminess and a big old hit of booze. *g*

Well, I know what I'm buying the next time I'm at the grocery store.

Another good "additive" for hot apple cider is the Italian liquor Tuaca.  It is cinnamon, vanilla and citrus flavored.  Put whipped cream on top and the drink is called "Hot Apple Pie"

[greencat]

Tonight I'm serving spiked apple cider- rum or calvados?

Ooh, normally I'd say rum but I've never tried calvados.

It's an apple brandy, so you get twice the apple yumminess and a big old hit of booze. *g*

Well, I know what I'm buying the next time I'm at the grocery store.

Another good "additive" for hot apple cider is the Italian liquor Tuaca.  It is cinnamon, vanilla and citrus flavored.  Put whipped cream on top and the drink is called "Hot Apple Pie"

My favorite liquor to add to apple cider (or apple juice) is Fireball Whiskey.  It's whiskey that has a sweet cinnamon flavor - it generally tastes like RedHots candies.  However, I tend to refer to it as the "alcohol of bad decisions," as it's 66 proof but doesn't taste strongly of alcohol.


I'm currently in a holding pattern with my personal life.  I want to start dating again, but I'm rather hesitant since I am hoping for an improved job (better pay and benefits) that comes with a rather different working schedule.

[siamesecat2965]

I sometimes feel like an oddball for being a spinster, but since men don't like me "that way" I stopped fighting it.  My dignity doesn't like being injured.

Since then I have become accustomed to being permanently single and it would be too much work to be in a relationship.

I do too, but for me its because of how society views us mature ladies who are still single, never been married, and not d@ting anyone. I always say if I could have anything I wanted, just one thing, it wouldn't be a "man". I would be to be financially secure for the rest of my life. 

While I would enjoy being involved with someone, I am also very very very set in my ways, and stubborn. I find it very hard to imagine myself living wiht someone else, and sharing ALL my time with them, or most of it. 

I cracked up some classmates at my 25th college reunion when I said I'd love to get married as long as I didn't have to live with my husband!  They all thought I was joking, but I wasn't. Then again, most of them got married within a couple years of graduation, and still are. So their path in life has been very different than mine!  I guess they can't imagine NOT being with someone, when that's all I've really ever known, and am quite happy with my "me" time.

[Venus193]

Agreed.  After all this time I wouldn't have time for a relationship and would need a huge living space to be able to live with anyone.

[siamesecat2965]

Agreed.  After all this time I wouldn't have time for a relationship and would need a huge living space to be able to live with anyone.

Even my own mother and I, who I get along with well, know we can't live together. Next door, yes, but in the same abode, so not happening!

My cousin, who is several years older, and just ended a 4 year relationship, keeps nagging me to go online dating. Which, when I'm good and ready, I may try. But at the moment, i have two jobs, and work 6 days a week. I have a coupld of free evenings, and Sunday. And have enough to do in that little free time I do have, without trying to squeeze in time for/with someone else.

[Outdoor Girl]

I have joked for many years that if I ever get married, hubby is going to have to buy the house next door.  Except, I'm not sure I'm really joking!  I've lived on my own for so long now that I'm not sure I could handle living with someone else.  We'd definitely need to get a different house - mine is too open concept for us to have our own spaces, which we'd need so I wouldn't kill him.

My Dad lived with me for a month or so when he had some surgery.  We survived but when he started talking about moving in with me, I cringed.  It may still happen but if it does, we'll be doing some renovations so he has his own little apartment with his own bathroom, bedroom and kitchenette.  We'd have dinner together but we'd need to have completely separate spaces.

[Petticoats]

I'm the same way. I don't know if I could share my space now; I love having a place to myself. But conjugal visits would be a must.