Author Topic: Spinsters' Club Support Thread  (Read 88622 times)

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LadyJaneinMD

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #795 on: November 13, 2013, 07:40:38 AM »
I need to buy this cat furniture.

I got my cat's tree from Cozy Cat Furniture  -  http://cozycatfurniture.com/
It's cheaper and better made then the stuff from the pet store.  I love that it's made of real plywood rather than pressboard, and my cat loves her tree.  It was relatively easy to assemble, too. The directions were very clear.
Enjoy.

I could easily become the Crazy Cat Lady of the neighborhood, but I'm allergic to my own cat. One cat, and I just sniffle a little.  Two cats, and my eyes swell up.   So....one cat forever.  Just one. 

Venus193

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #796 on: November 13, 2013, 12:16:04 PM »
I feel for you.  It would upset me greatly if I couldn't cuddle and kiss my furbabies.

Julian

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #797 on: November 14, 2013, 10:40:10 PM »
Being single has its positives.

I don't have to share my bed.  Oh wait...  yup, I do, the dogs take it over, hog the warm spots and steal the blankets.

I can go anywhere and do anything.  Except Housemate gets worried if I'm home late, and wants to go everywhere with me when I'm not working...

I can schlub off odd jobs till I'm ready to do them.  Oh no, I can't - Housemate nags until I do them.

Hmm, all the disadvantages of 'relationship' with none of the advantages??

Move over girls, I'm coming out on the ledge to join you...   :-\

greencat

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #798 on: November 14, 2013, 11:02:25 PM »
I'm just hoping that my budding relationship with Mr. Handsome, Kind, and Smart doesn't fizzle with my upcoming change in my work schedule.  I swear I'm cursed - I can either have the time and money to have a relationship or someone to have one with!

Redneck Gravy

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #799 on: November 15, 2013, 01:08:31 PM »
I had dinner with a couple of single female friends Tuesday evening, of course the discussion turned to happy/unhappy relationships. I said my bro & sil are the unhappiest couple I know, I keep wondering why they stay together and are miserable. 

My friend A says, "probably because they are afraid they will die sad and alone like us."   :o

I said, "I'm not sad and I don't think I am going to die alone.  I have kids, siblings & friends around." 

Friend B said, "I'm with you, I have kids and friends too and I'm not sad either."

Friend A had nothing else to say.  I'm concerned that she is so unhappy that she really does believe she is going to die sad and alone.  Of all my friends she is the one complaining regularly about being alone, she is also the one that does nothing to change that.  I was just shocked that she lumped us in with her.  The topic died a rapid brutal death and was not brought up again during dinner.



 


siamesecat2965

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #800 on: November 15, 2013, 01:16:00 PM »
I had dinner with a couple of single female friends Tuesday evening, of course the discussion turned to happy/unhappy relationships. I said my bro & sil are the unhappiest couple I know, I keep wondering why they stay together and are miserable. 

My friend A says, "probably because they are afraid they will die sad and alone like us."   :o

I said, "I'm not sad and I don't think I am going to die alone.  I have kids, siblings & friends around." 

Friend B said, "I'm with you, I have kids and friends too and I'm not sad either."

Friend A had nothing else to say.  I'm concerned that she is so unhappy that she really does believe she is going to die sad and alone.  Of all my friends she is the one complaining regularly about being alone, she is also the one that does nothing to change that.  I was just shocked that she lumped us in with her.  The topic died a rapid brutal death and was not brought up again during dinner.



 

Yup. i am convinced there are plenty of couples who stay together for that very reason. But I'm like you and your other friend. WHile i don't have kids, i have friends and family, and enjoy being alone. If you had to ask me the one thing I woudl change about my life, its not that I'd want a partner, its that I wish i could be financially stable for the rest of my life, and be able to buy a house, be debt free, travel, and have fun. THAT is the only thing I'd change.

TurtleDove

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #801 on: November 15, 2013, 01:46:23 PM »
Friend A had nothing else to say.  I'm concerned that she is so unhappy that she really does believe she is going to die sad and alone.  Of all my friends she is the one complaining regularly about being alone, she is also the one that does nothing to change that.

The sad truth is that this may prove to be a self-fulfilling prophecy.  It is not common for a person to be attracted to someone who is visibly unhappy and complaining while doing nothing to change it.  :(  I hope your friend can take notes from you, Redneck Gravy!

Redneck Gravy

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #802 on: November 15, 2013, 02:33:04 PM »
Friend A had nothing else to say.  I'm concerned that she is so unhappy that she really does believe she is going to die sad and alone.  Of all my friends she is the one complaining regularly about being alone, she is also the one that does nothing to change that.

The sad truth is that this may prove to be a self-fulfilling prophecy.  It is not common for a person to be attracted to someone who is visibly unhappy and complaining while doing nothing to change it.  :(  I hope your friend can take notes from you, Redneck Gravy!

B i n g o  !

Petticoats

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #803 on: November 15, 2013, 04:06:02 PM »
And that's one of the cruddy things about being lonely or sad to be alone, because you constantly get the message that you have to not feel that way to find someone.

I have no siblings, no kids. I look at my parents helping each other out with doctors' appointments, health issues, all of that, and I am increasingly unnerved at the thought of what old age will be like for me.

Lynn2000

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #804 on: November 15, 2013, 04:43:44 PM »
I also like the idea of having separate spaces in a shared dwelling... I think I would really need that if I lived with someone else. I am way too used to living alone and having things my own way. Even stuff like, putting something down and knowing no one will move it, so it will be right there when I go looking for it. That sort of thing happens with my parents all the time, that one of them will deliberately put something somewhere for a reason, and the other one will go and move it for another reason. ::) I wouldn't call that a reason to never have someone else in the house ever, but it's certainly discouraging. Or weird things showing up in the fridge when you don't know what they are, how long they've been there, if anyone really plans to eat them. My dad is infamous for doing this. My fridge is almost embarrassingly empty, I know what everything is, *I* put it there, and I can throw it out or eat it whenever I want without consulting anyone.

Of course there are downsides, too, sometimes things I've never even thought about before. For example, I'm trying to move into a new position at work, and my boss (who is an alarmist, I must admit) was telling me how it would be so much easier to move me to this position if I had a spouse who was also employed at the company. They do "spousal hiring" as a perk to lure/keep good employees, allowing their spouses to bypass a lot of the usual channels for gaining employment. But obviously there's no equivalent thing for a single employee. Great, thanks for putting that in my head. ::)
~Lynn2000

Honeypickle

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #805 on: November 15, 2013, 05:33:46 PM »
"I was just shocked that she lumped us in with her."

If she doesn't have children, and you and your friend do, don't you think your response was a little cruel? Being alone with no partner is very different to being single with children.

Lynn2000

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #806 on: November 15, 2013, 05:51:26 PM »
"I was just shocked that she lumped us in with her."

If she doesn't have children, and you and your friend do, don't you think your response was a little cruel? Being alone with no partner is very different to being single with children.

Well, she does at least have friends, though, since she was eating with two of them. It wasn't a very good reflection on how she felt about them, either.  :-\ I would be kind of shocked, too, if a single friend tried to say "all of us" were "sad and alone"--sometimes I do feel that way myself, but it's not a very good characterization to hear from someone else. I do feel kind of bad for her, though. Maybe you guys could make getting together a regular thing, maybe go out and do some activities together for fun (if you don't already)?
~Lynn2000

greencat

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #807 on: November 16, 2013, 12:46:29 PM »
I think I may be turning in my membership card!  I went out with the guy from last week and a few other people including one of my few close female friends to a movie, and when he went to the restroom, she turned to me and said "He's gorgeous, he's nice, he's smart, he's charming...Is he a robot?"

I swear I did not go to Build-a-Boyfriend. 

Redneck Gravy

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #808 on: November 17, 2013, 01:20:52 PM »
"I was just shocked that she lumped us in with her."

If she doesn't have children, and you and your friend do, don't you think your response was a little cruel? Being alone with no partner is very different to being single with children.

We each have two children.  We are about the same age as are our children.  The three of us have been friends for at least 20 years and we do go out/get together at least once a month plus our birthdays and a holiday dinner. 

I think calling me "cruel" was a bit assumptive before you found out if she had children. 

siamesecat2965

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Re: Spinsters' Club Support Thread
« Reply #809 on: November 17, 2013, 04:53:05 PM »
And that's one of the cruddy things about being lonely or sad to be alone, because you constantly get the message that you have to not feel that way to find someone.

I have no siblings, no kids. I look at my parents helping each other out with doctors' appointments, health issues, all of that, and I am increasingly unnerved at the thought of what old age will be like for me.

Me too. Its just me and mom. And while I hope to be as independent and healthy as she is, and her mom was, the thought is a bit scary.

On a lighter note, and i can't post the cartoon, but my mom sent me an email with a bunch of Maxine cartoons. One said 'A man without a woman is a bachelor, a woman without a man is a genius" it made me giggle.