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Author Topic: No, I don't have a problem with Christmas actually...  (Read 3370 times)

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No, I don't have a problem with Christmas actually...
« on: November 26, 2011, 12:22:01 PM »
I have younger coworkers who are enthusiastic and a lot of fun to be around.  Sometimes.  It would appear that the majority of them are really gearing up for the holiday season with several of them having put up their trees before Thanksgiving.  Frankly, I don't care what they do in their own home and I listen to their stories with good humor and I am happy that they are happy and that they enjoy themselves. 

However, over the past few years, I have been less enthusiastic about Christmas.  My mom and brothers died within a short time of each other.  My nieces are grown and living their own lives.  My husband is an avid shopping hater so we don't exchange gifts anymore and he only buys for his own children (which is fine, I usually just get my nieces gift cards and my widowed father a bottle of his favorie bourban) I don't need the sugary treats, and I am toying with the idea of not putting up a tree.  See, I don't mind the holidays but I absolutely loathe the post-holiday letdown feeling I get each year.  I do enjoy the holiday displays and looking at Christmas cards in the rack but I feel that I am just past the other stuff. 

Anyway, I guess this lack of outward cheer makes me look kind of curmedgeonly and some of my coworkers can't seem to stand it.  Last year, I got Christmas trinkets in my mailbox or seasonally wrapped candy or something.  They were doing it to have fun and yes, I am a good sport, but I honestly don't know how to impart to them that my approach isn't all that bad. 


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Re: No, I don't have a problem with Christmas actually...
« Reply #1 on: November 26, 2011, 12:35:03 PM »
"Sorry guys, I've just had trouble mustering the enthusiasm these last couple of years. But I think it's great you guys get so into it."

Then you can add one of these lines whether they are entirely true or not:

"Actually, your holiday spirit cheers me up a lot!"

"it's so lovely to see you guys starting your own traditions and enjoying the season so much."

.....(insert an anecdote of your own from a Christmas in the past to let them know you really have enjoyed it and you're really not a Scrooge)


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Re: No, I don't have a problem with Christmas actually...
« Reply #2 on: November 26, 2011, 02:51:08 PM »
Do they seem to single you out with the xmas trinket gifts or they just include you in little gifts that they get one another? I'm not sure it matters much...just treat it as any other gift and thank them and take it home to dispose of it how you wish. There is no need to reciprocate.

I'm not big into xmas either...actually I'm not enthusiastic about any holiday other than Halloween and even that I'm not consistently up for it. I just say a lot of "It's not really my thing" & "I think it'll be a quiet one at home this year" then add a question or comment about their celebrations and/or enthusiasm.
Do I contradict myself? Very well, then I contradict myself, I am large, I contain multitudes.
Walt Whitman


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Re: No, I don't have a problem with Christmas actually...
« Reply #3 on: November 29, 2011, 08:27:37 PM »
Short of your co-workers forcing you into a chair and tying you up in tinsel in order to stuff you full Christmas cheer, I am not really sure why you should impart your way of doing things on them. I don't really see it as a matter of convincing anyone- people deal with holidays differently. If it sincerely hurts you to receive gifts, perhaps a blanket e-mail explaining your hurt (not preaching your POV.) But even that seems a bit much. If I were to receive that, I would be a little hurt. I make cookies for my whole office this time of year. Frankly I don't care if people eat them, give them away, or throw them out. But I wouldn't want it thrown back in my face. I would quietly get rid of the Christmas cheer that is given to you, and if someone asks, just take them aside and mention that it isn't a happy time for you, or something to that effect.
"He attacked everything in life with a mix of extraordinary genius and naive incompetence, and it was often difficult to tell which was which." Douglas Adams


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Re: No, I don't have a problem with Christmas actually...
« Reply #4 on: November 30, 2011, 09:48:22 AM »
I'm with you; I used to love Christmas, but sadly, my dad passed away ON Christmas Day, so ever since, it hasn't been the same.  My friends and co-workers are aware so I don't get much grief from them, but in my PT job, which is retail, I have to put on a happy face and go with the flow when customer gush about the holidays.  I've gotten quite good at too!


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Re: No, I don't have a problem with Christmas actually...
« Reply #5 on: November 30, 2011, 10:20:37 AM »
I don't think you need to impart anything.  They don't need to know if you decorate your house or not.  I haven't decorated in over 10 years and I'm only 40.  I buy gifts for my mom, sis and niece and nephew. I stopped exchanging with my bro and SIL (parents of said kids) because of money reasons several years ago and even though I could afford to now, I still don't because they are impossible to buy for, and I do kind of resent having to shell out for 4 people there while getting one token gift "from the kids" and not from BIL/SIL, so I feel this way balances things out a bit more.

Holiday Bullies really bug me. In my old office the decorating got out of hand as departments competed with eachother. I was considered a spoilsport for not decorating my door.  I told them this was 'not my thing' and just ignored their derision. I really didn't care what they thought.

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Re: No, I don't have a problem with Christmas actually...
« Reply #6 on: November 30, 2011, 11:39:29 AM »
For me, Christmas is a stress filled guilt fest, balancing divorced parents and spending money on ungrateful nieces and nephews (belive me, family peace is much better if I buy them gifts).

I dread the holiday, and simply can't muster up much "cheer" for it.

At least I have my annual Solstice celebration with friends.  That's fun.
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